₦airaland Forum

Thanks. I was hoping for more analysis of the idea, though.

Shawna, you aren't listening to what we are saying.

Cures for malaria exist and we are using them.

Do you think you know more about malaria than we do, because you're in America?

Q: Daddy, why did we have to attack Iraq?

A: Because they had weapons of mass destruction honey.

Q: But the inspectors didn't find any weapons of mass destruction.

A: That's because the Iraqis were hiding them.

Q: And that's why we invaded Iraq?

A: Yep. Invasions always work better than inspections.

Q: But after we invaded them, we STILL didn't find any weapons of mass
destruction, did we?

A: That's because the weapons are so well hidden. Don't worry, we'll
find
something, probably right before the 2004 election.

Q: Why did Iraq want all those weapons of mass destruction?

A: To use them in a war, silly.

Q: I'm confused. If they had all those weapons that they planned to use
in
a war, then why didn't they use any of those weapons when we went to
war with them?

A: Well, obviously they didn't want anyone to know they had those
weapons so they chose to die by the thousands rather than defend
themselves.

Q: That doesn't make sense Daddy. Why would they choose to die if they
had all those big weapons to fight us back with?

A: It's a different culture. It's not supposed to make sense.

Q: I don't know about you, but I don't think they had any of those
weapons our government said they did.

A: Well, you know, it doesn't matter whether or not they had those
weapons. We had another good reason to invade them anyway.

Q: And what was that?

A: Even if Iraq didn't have weapons of mass destruction, Saddam
Hussein was cruel dictator, which is another good reason to invade
another country.

Q: Why? What does a cruel dictator do that makes it OK to invade his
country?

A: Well, for one thing, he tortured his own people.

Q: Kind of like what they do in China?

A: Don't go comparing China to Iraq. China is a good economic
competitor, where millions of people work for slave wages in sweatshops
to make U.S. corporations richer.

Q: So if a country lets its people be exploited for American corporate
gain, it's a good country, even if that country tortures people?

A: Right.

Q: Why were people in Iraq being tortured?

A: For political crimes, mostly, like criticizing the government. People

who criticized the government in Iraq were sent to prison and tortured.

Q: Isn't that exactly what happens in China?

A: I told you, China is different.

Q: What's the difference between China and Iraq?

A: Well, for one thing, Iraq was ruled by the Ba'ath party, while China
is
Communist.

Q: Didn't you once tell me Communists were bad?

A: No, just Cuban Communists are bad.

Q: How are the Cuban Communists bad?

A: Well, for one thing, people who criticize the government in Cuba are
sent to prison and tortured.


Q: Like in Iraq?


A: Exactly.

Q: And like in China, too?

A: I told you, China's a good economic competitor. Cuba, on the other
hand, is not.

Q: How come Cuba isn't a good economic competitor?

A: Well, you see, back in the early 1960s, our government passed some
laws that made it illegal for Americans to trade or do any business wiA:
Well, you see, back in the early 1960s, our government passed some laws
that made it illegal for Americans to trade or do any business with Cuba

until they stopped being Communists and started being capitalists like
us.

Q: But if we got rid of those laws, opened up trade with Cuba, and
started doing business with them, wouldn't that help the Cubans become
capitalists?

A: Don't be a smart-ass.

Q: I didn't think I was being one.

A: Well, anyway, they also don't have freedom of religion in Cuba.

Q: Kind of like China and the Falun Gong movement?

A: I told you, stop saying bad things about China. Anyway, Saddam
Hussein came to power through a military coup, so he's not really a
legitimate leader anyway.

Q: What's a military coup?

A: That's when a military general takes over the government of a country

by force, instead of holding free elections like we do in the United
States.

Q: Didn't the ruler of Pakistan come to power by a military coup?

A: You mean General Pervez Musharraf? Uh, yeah, he did, but Pakistan is
our friend.

Q: Why is Pakistan our friend if their leader is illegitimate?

A: I never said Pervez Musharraf was illegitimate.

Q: Didn't you just say a military general who comes to power by forcibly

overthrowing the legitimate government of a nation is an illegitimate
leader?

A: Only Saddam Hussein. Pervez Musharraf is our friend, because he
helped us invade Afghanistan.

Q: Why did we invade Afghanistan?

A: Because of what they did to us on September 11th.

Q: What did Afghanistan do to us on September 11th?

A: Well, on September 11th, nineteen men? Fifteen of them Saudi
Arabians? hijacked four airplanes and flew three of them into
buildings, killing over 3,000 Americans.

Q: So how did Afghanistan figure into all that?

A: Afghanistan was where those bad men trained, under the oppressive
rule of the Taliban.

Q: Aren't the Taliban those bad radical Islamics who chopped off
people's
heads and hands?

A: Yes, that's exactly who they were. Not only did they chop off
people's
heads and hands, but they oppressed women, too.

Q: Didn't the Bush administration give the Taliban 43 million dollars
back
in May of 2001?

A: Yes, but that money was a reward because they did such a good job
fighting drugs.

Q: Fighting drugs?

A: Yes, the Taliban were very helpful in stopping people from growing
opium poppies.

Q: How did they do such a good job?

A: Simple. If people were caught growing opium poppies, the Taliban
would have their hands and heads cut off.

Q: So, when the Taliban cut off people's heads and hands for growing
flowers, that was OK, but not if they cut people's heads and hands off

for other reasons?

A: Yes. It's OK with us if radical Islamic fundamentalists cut off
people's hands for growing flowers, but it's cruel if they cut off
people's hands for stealing bread.

Q: Don't they also cut off people's hands and heads in Saudi Arabia?

A: That's different. Afghanistan was ruled by a tyrannical patriarchy
that
oppressed women and forced them to wear burqas whenever they were in
public, with death by stoning as the penalty for women who did not
comply.

Q: Don't Saudi women have to wear burqas in public, too?

A: No, Saudi women merely wear a traditional Islamic body covering.

Q: What's the difference?

A: The traditional Islamic covering worn by Saudi women is a modest yet
fashionable garment that covers all of a woman's body except for her
eyes and fingers. The burqa, on the other hand, is an evil tool of
patriarchal
oppression that covers all of a woman's body except for her eyes and
fingers.

Q: It sounds like the same thing with a different name.

A: Now, don't go comparing Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia. The Saudis are
our friends.

Q: But I thought you said 15 of the 19 hijackers on September 11th were
from Saudi Arabia.

A: Yes, but they trained in Afghanistan.

Q: Who trained them?

A: A very bad man named Osama bin Laden.

Q: Was he from Afghanistan?

A: Uh, no, he was from Saudi Arabia too. But he was a bad man, a very
bad man.

Q: I seem to recall he was our friend once.

A: Only when we helped him and the mujahadeen repel the Soviet invasion
of Afghanistan back in the 1980s.

Q: Who are the Soviets? Was that the Evil Communist Empire Ronald Reagan
talked about?

A: There are no more Soviets. The Soviet Union broke up in 1990 or
thereabouts, and now they have elections and capitalism like us. We call

them Russians now.

Q: So the Soviets ? I mean, the Russians ? are now our friends?
A: Well, not really. You see, they were our friends for many years after

they stopped being Soviets, but then they decided not to support our
invasion of Iraq, so we're mad at them now. We're also mad at the French

and the Germans because they didn't help us invade Iraq either.

Q: So the French and Germans are evil, too?

A: Not exactly evil, but just bad enough that we had to rename French
fries and French toast to Freedom Fries and Freedom Toast.

Q: Do we always rename foods whenever another country doesn't do what we
want them to do?

A: No, we just do that to our friends. Our enemies, we invade.

Q: But wasn't Iraq one of our friends back in the 1980s?

A: Well, yeah. For a while.

Q: Was Saddam Hussein ruler of Iraq back then?

A: Yes, but at the time he was fighting against Iran, which made him our

friend, temporarily.

Q: Why did that make him our friend?

A: Because at that time, Iran was our enemy.

Q: Isn't that when he gassed the Kurds?

A: Yeah, but since he was fighting against Iran at the time, we looked
the
other way, to show him we were his friend.

Q: So anyone who fights against one of our enemies automatically becomes
our friend?

A: Most of the time, yes.

Q: And anyone who fights against one of our friends is automatically an
enemy?

A: Sometimes that's true, too. However, if American corporations can
profit by selling weapons to both sides at the same time, all the
better.

Q: Why?

A: Because war is good for the economy, which means war is good for
America. Also, since God is on America's side, anyone who opposes war is
a godless un-American Communist. Do you understand now why we attacked
Iraq?

Q: I think so. We attacked them because God wanted us to, right?

A: Yes.

Q: But how did we know God wanted us to attack Iraq?

A: Well, you see, God personally speaks to George W. Bush and tells him
what to do.

Q: So basically, what you're saying is that we attacked Iraq because
George W. Bush hears voices in his head?

A. Yes! You finally understand how the world works. Now close your
eyes,make yourself comfortable, and go to sleep. Good night.

Q: Good night, Daddy.

Your Nija man is not too bad, but there's room for improvement.

See https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-212.0.html

Yes, but why can't our super-hero use the same "chi" to fight criminals?

The printing industry is a very secretive one. I don't see how you'll get this information from them.

If a girl wants me to die for her, rather than her dying for me, that means she does not love me!

Because if she loved me, she won't want me to die for her. Rather, she'll prefer to die so I might live!

- Which Computer Games Do You Play? -

Have you seen Pastor Chris and his mentors Benny Hinn, Reinhard Bonnke in operation?

They wave their hands at a crowd and everybody falls down. Now imagine a super-hero waving at the bad guys and causing them to fall down. Isn't that exciting?

We used to have cats at home. I observed them.

It's common for a mother cat to catch a rat and then bring it to its children to play with. Playing with a live rat is supposed to sharpen their hunting kills, but really it's for fun. They just love to play with mice!

It's not as if they are hungry, since we feed them anyway. They are just cruel by nature!

I'll advice them to use a condom because my wife has HIV.

Then I'll bring one out from my pocket and hand it to them.

In such a situation, you can only minimize the damage.

I guess they won't approve if I make any decision that doesn't coincide exactly with their wishes.

animals attack when they feel threatened or when they are hungry

Cats kill mice for food and sometimes for fun. Why can't I attack a kitty-cat when I am hungry or bored?

Ever heard of a food chain?

Well, we're on top of the food chain, so does this mean we can do whatever we like with animals?

I suggest we also eliminate all non-vegetarian human beings on the Earth since the chickens, rabbits and beef they eat has been taken from killed animals who never did anything to them.

Really, you want us to treat human being like animals? You're so cruel!

i'd like to see a woman doing the jobs considered "manly" without eye brows being raised!

This is a commendable goal but the best way to achieve this is to own a profitable business with 'manly' jobs and employ women. The NGO route is not the right route to take.

Read this:

My attention was drawn to the ignorance displayed because of little or no information about the truth on white garment churches at your nairaland site. I wish you could link your chatters/commentators to this upcoming site to strike a balance in favour of Jesus Christ , the church and the kingdom of God. The site is www.csbibleministries.org

So please visit www.csbibleministries.org to learn more about them

"My fellow citizens of the world, ask not what America will do for you, but what together we can do for the freedom of man" http://www.americanrhetoric.com/speeches/johnfkennedyinaugural.htm

Ok, he was not a villian afterall. The original quote was about promoting the freedom of man, which is good.

The president that said "ask not what your country can do for you, but ask what you can do for your country" is a villian to me. This is like saying, "ask not what your food can do for you". People are more important than countries.

Carnivorous pets like dogs and cats are cruel by nature:
They love to kill defenseless animals for food.

Carnivoruous wild animals like lions, tigers, and exotic snakes are just the same:
They kill innocent wild animals for food, and sometimes just for fun.
They even attack human beings sometimes.

So why do we show them so much love?
- Why do we complain when people are cruel to these animals?
- Why do we get upset when someone kills a dog or cat for meat, research, or its fur?
- Why don't we feel guilty about killing chickens and cows that haven't hurt anyone?

In summary, why can't we be cruel to cruel animals? Why do we protect carnivorous pets/animals?

What are your career goals?

Well, I guess mine are:
- To earn lots of money legitimately.
- To achieve this without working for a giant, soulless company.
- To own a lot of important businesses like power plants, TV stations, and publishing houses.

I can't think of anything else. Can you? Let's know your own career goals! Thanks.

Hello,

I just got myself a Laserjet 1020 printer. It's fast, and the cost per page is low compared to a deskjet.

I wonder if I can cut my printing costs further by refilling my toner cartridge each time I run out of toner. Do you know where I can buy the refill kit, toner and learn how to use them?

Thanks a million.

Hello,

Most people create business empires by buying or starting several small or medium-sized companies and merging them into a giant centrally-controlled company. So we see companies like Microsoft, Google and Oracle growing bigger every year by buying up new companies. I have with this approach: I dislike big company politics.

In a small company, the manager is typically also the major shareholder, and he runs the business with a sense of responsibility that no hired hand can exhibit. He knows that most of the profit his company makes will end up in his pocket, so his interests are aligned with the interests of a company.

On the other hand, a large company tends to be managed by several layers of administrators who are really only concerned about their own pockets. At the end of the day, a hired hand becomes the CEO. The company loses focus because really, it's not clear who the employees are working for: the CEO? the directors? the share-flippers?

No one really owns the company, so it becomes a political ('corporate') establishment. Look at Microsoft. They can't even ship code anymore. They are just to big. Their company has no soul, unlike say Nairaland.

So I want to have a business empire - I really do - but I don't want to create or work in a gigantic corporate organism where politics, rather than ownership, is what determines who is in charge or what he company does. I want to be the one making the decisions in my empire, else I want the people making the decisions to be owners too.

I've decided that I'm going to organize my future business empire as a network of small companies, each of which has no more than 45-150 employees, and is managed by one person who owns 40% of it(while I hold 50%). Each company will serve other companies within the network and will also be free to look elsewhere for business.

Each unit within my empire will be a profit-making unit, unlike in big companies where most departments tend to lose money and most of the money comes from just one department. My managers will be entrepreneurs and not politicians because their capital will be tied up in the company and they won't be able to sell their shares. It'll be great.

I'll to have a website where I can log in every morning to read up-to-date reports on income, expenditure, contracts signed, and hires in each small company within my empire. If a particular unit is not doing well, I'll contact the manager to find out what's wrong. If I lose confidence in a any manager, I'll just buy him off (shotgun clause).

I'll also set up a loan market within the network such that a business in the investment stage will be able to borrow money from a current cash cow and pay back later when its investments start paying off. Any unit that runs out of money will be allowed to die. This way, the managers will pay for their incompetence.

I feel that with this system, I'll be able to create a strong business empire with soul. What's your take?

There's no country worth dying for!

Countries were created to serve people's interests, and not the other way round!

I would happily pay thousands a month to be able to borrow the latest business books from a library in Nigeria.

Yes.
- Post your scripts on Nairaland to get more exposure.
- Go for a business with more customers. (TV advertising? School dramas with product placement?)