₦airaland Forum

Let’s talk Story Telling Baby!

Any primary 2 pupil, who has ever told a folktale during Story time in school, can tell a good story must have 4 things to keep the audience interested.

For our purposes and because I think story telling in all of it forms should be a religion, I’ll call these rules THE 4 TENETS OF STORY TELLING.

Introduction - this is the beginning of the story, where information is given to the reader about the story's characters, location and time period.

Conflict - this is generally introduced near the beginning of the story we learn that the major character has a problem or conflict, either personal (internal) or with someone or something else (external).

Climax - this occurs when the conflict is pushed to its limits, something intense, important, or climactic occurs, usually near the end of the story.

Resolution - this is the continuation of the story after the climax. The resolution may answer questions you are left with after the climax, or it may leave questions intentionally unanswered

To show the above is not new, let’s take one of our African Fables and see if we can apply the four rules to it.

Once upon a time in the Animal kingdom, there lived a tortoise. They tortoise always slept while others farmed because he thought he only needed his brains and not brawn to survive (introduction)

The other animals hated him because they thought he felt he was trying to say he was smarter than all of them. They decided to deal with him by lying to the king that they overhead the tortoise saying he more intelligent than the king (Conflict)

This made the king angry and he decided to put the tortoise to death. When the tortoise was brought to the presence of the king, he was asked to make one request before his hanging. (Climax)

The tortoise requested to be have his life spared and since it was the law of the land that all last requests must be granted, the king had no choice and that’s how the tortoise was spared (resolution)

See, it’s been there since beginning of time!

A good story should progress like the diagram below

[img]http://depts.gallaudet.edu/englishworks/literature/fiction.gif[/img]

Simple as ABC isn’t it? Then why oh why is Nollywood having a hard time applying these simple rules in their story telling?

Instead of the diagram above, a typical Nollywood movie goes one of three ways

1) A flatline where nothing is happening and everyone just sleepwalks through the entire movie



2) In circles where it seems like the actors know they are meant to do something but for the life of them, they are not sure what it is, so they just keep doing the same thing over and over again. In this scenario, the movie peaks at two points - The beginning when the audience is optimistic about seeing a good movie and at the end when the audience is overcome with relief that the movie is over.


3) All over the place, too many things happening at the same time, the audience can’t keep up with it. This is where you find yourself asking questions like “wait isn’t this the dead guy” and getting answers like “no, that was his brother in law’s son, the one who they first thought was dead but we found out wasn’t and was only pretending to be the other one who is really dead. . . I think, I’m not sure”


Introduction! Conflict! Climax! Resolutions. . . Nollywood writers, please learn it, embrace it, apply it and if it is too difficult to do, just ask your 7yrs old folktale telling daughters and sons to write your stories for you, okay? Thanks 

The 4 Tenets of Storytelling. . . brought to you by the NOLLYWOOD REVOLUTIONIST BAND! https://forum.surfthechannel.com/style_emoticons/default/badsinger.gif

Coolio!

Who was it who said “When I do good, no one remembers. When I do bad, no one forgets?” Anyway, this is exactly what happens with Nigeria, the bad things are exaggerated while the good things are understated and even never talked about.

If you are getting your information from the internet, of course you wouldn’t want to go back, sometimes when I read what’s people have to say about the country, I want to  go hide under my bed in fear, then I remember this is the same Nigeria my nieces can’t wait to go back to when they came here for vacation. This is the same Nigeria we have to beg my mom to leave just to come visit us here and after one week she’s telling us “Our Ilu does not ba her la ra mu” meaning she’s ready to go back. . . THAT NIGERIA. People are living there and they are very happy!!

If you don't want to go back to Nigeria, that's perfectly fine but please stop trying to make it out to be hell on earth, it isn’t!

@ Ikeyman00
Rotflmao! Nigeria does not need me? I should denounce my Nigerian Status. . . because I told you to take the advice you are so quick to dish out?

Are you kidding me?

Where is your proof? Where is the evidence to support your post. . . The post you used to rubbish another person's post? You told him to stop spreading false premise, yet you do the same. . . And before you say you know what you know, I should tell you it won't make a difference because until you show some supporting evidence, yours is also an idea you just plucked out of your imagination. Wishful thinking, my dear is NOT reality, okay?

Do you get it now. . . Mr. Nigeria?

Oy Vey!

ikeyman00:
sorri bro, continue fooling yourself as much as u like till the end of the earth!

dnt know much about the most educated tribe, but what i can tell u is when it comes to education right

in igbo land na imo people

in yoruba land na ogunstate people minus all the alaye boyz ha

edo etc, so please check careful before spreading your hoax and funni premise everywhere plzzzzzzzzzz

should u think u can proof me otherwise feel free to do so
1 love

LMOA! Yeah, the way you are being careful about spreading hoax and funny premise. You sure proved him wrong with all your stats, articles and whatnot! I'm telling you, It's gonna take a long time to finish reading all the data you have so generously provided to support your premise!

@poster
With people like you i do not think these Country called Nigeria can make any head way
Do we all want to be WINNERS ?
When Live in Nigeria is purely Meassured on freiends is a Public Officer who probaly has stolen the common wealth of all to enrich himself and immediate Family. These our problem Everybody coming from Abroad must be Stupendously rich if not his a failure
MAN rethink or ur perish

Do we all want to be winners? Err. . . I'd hope so. I doubt anyone wakes up in the morning and says "Today, I hope to be a loser, father Lord help me be the best loser I can be"

I think you meant to say not everyone wants to be ostentatious and materialistic, right?

Metal Scrappers? Lmao! Was going for garbage scrappers but this is good too!

The insinuation here is that if they spent more time making the movie, they will see the flaws and you know. . . correct 'em. You'D have to be top of the top, good at what you do, to shoot in a week and these ones. . . well they ain't.

Something has got to give, don't you think? Either perfect your skills so shooting in 1 week makes no difference to the quality of the end product or take all the time in the world with the end result being quality work.

You feel?


A good focused script will always help detract the audience from a flawed technical production.

Love this and will also add "in the right hand".

A Good focused script in the right hands will always help distract the audience from a flawed technical production. . . because  there are some people out there who can turn cheesecake to dog poo in 30 secs flat!!!!!!

vescucci:
Sisi, answer this boy o. Me waiting for a PM too o. With a YIM to relate with o. Do quick o. Abeg o. Okay o. Bye bye o.

Tee hee hee. . . AIM?

grafikdon:
Kanto, take am easy o. . .

Hey, Hey. . . everybody has their own way of catching fun, don't ruin mine for me ooooooo. 

grafikdon:
@Sisikill, the big problem is most of the movie producers see the art of film making through the prism of manufacturing, hence the inclination to knock together a movie in one or two weeks and rush it to the market for a ''quickie'' ermm. . . I was referring to fast cash/profit. I was totally stunned when I gathered from a very reliable source that one of the ''gods''. . . emmm. . . I mean. . . marketers refused to work with Izu Ojukwu because according to him, Ojukwu ''takes too long'' and by ''too long'' he meant 3 months.

No Way! Please, tell me you are just pulling my legs!
Three months? . . . three months is too long to shoot!!!
Charlatans! Hack! Quacks!
Ughh! Why I oughta. . . https://forum.surfthechannel.com/style_emoticons/default/fist.gif

In my humble opinion, no serious director or producer will attempt to direct/produce more than four films in one year. I could be wrong but that's just my humble opinion. That is the reason why the likes of Ogoro, Ojukwu and Ogidan do not have dish out 365 films in one year. Spending a little extra time is no guarantee one will end up with a ''hit'' but it sure gives you a better opportunity to fix glaring errors in post production.

Absolutely, Positively Correct!! QUALITY not QUANTITY!!!

Hmmm, someone is making a fool of themselves quiet alright, let’s see shall we. . .

Flashback Naija movie style with stupid sound effect. . . . trrrriiiiiiiiinnnnnn

Me - Nollywood makes crappy  movies.

Kanto – Yeee! You are a witch and a wizard!

Me - Nollywood needs to step up their movie making game.

Drama Queen Kanto – Ah! It will not better for you.

Me - Just because we criticize Nollywood, does not mean we hate it.

Foaming in the Mouth Kanto -  You are evil creature, Bastard!

Me - https://forum.surfthechannel.com/style_emoticons/default/sneak.gif

Kantolino - White supremacist are right! You are a monkey! A Racists,

Me - https://www.clipartof.com/images/thumbnail/2014.gif

Oga Kanto - I am even doing you a favour by responding to you. I am far too superior to empty lesser mortals

Me – Oh Wow! Bravo! https://www.messengerfreak.com/emoticons/smilies/clapping2.gif

Superior god Kanto ^{using his super powers to spit 100 sentences in 1 go} - nigeriaissuretoremaininthedustbinforalongtimetocome!Whatwillyouallanationthatcannotprovidecommonelectricity?Whatwillyoucallanationthat cannotprovidecommonpipebornewater?Whatycallanationthatcannotprovidehospitals?Whatwillyoucallanation that cannot provide good schools?Whatwillyoucallanationwheretheleadersgoabroadfortreatmentandsendtheirchildrentoschoolsabroad?Whatwill you call a nation that cannot provide security for her citizens?Whatwillyou call a nation that cannot provide roads?What will you call a nation with over 70% unemployment?What will you call a nation that cannot organize simple free and fair elections?What will you call a nation that is the 6th largest oil producer in the world but imports fuel?What will you call a nation where human corpses can be seen on the streets?What will you call a nation where all the leaders at every level are government robbers?


Me - Lawd-a-mercy! https://www.messengerfreak.com/emoticons/smilies/BlahBlah.gif


Bobo Kanto - Empty good for nothing, loudmouths, lowlifes and enemies of progress

Me - https://www.clipartof.com/images/thumbnail/2235.gif ^{When are we going to talk movie making?}


Returns to present Naija movie style with the another stupid sound effect. . . paaaraaaraaan

Ah! Yes, I can see now, I am the one who is making a fool of myself,  . . Totally!


Rotflmao! Jeebus! Like I said, when you are ready to talk movie making. . . just holla! Mmmkay!

Until then https://www.messengerfreak.com/emoticons/smilies/Tongue04.gif 

What the. . .

Yes Tara pay attention to the people who are telling you not to pay attention to what your husband is trying to tell you.

That's right, ignore your husband when he tells you he doesn't want you, ignore him when he says he can't be seen with you at parties, ignore him when he tells you he doesn't want you attending his church. When he told you he plans to move back to Nigeria in 2 years and you won't be coming along because you are not Nigerian enough for him. . . I hope that entered one ear and came out the other? It didn't? Ah, okay start ignoring it fast, fast. Last but not least, ignore the fact that he is doing the horizontal tango with his refugee girlfriend, instead imagine she is his male buddy whom he plays touch football or wrestling with. . . at night. . . on the bed.

TARA, IGNORE ALL THE SIGNS, THE COMMON SENSE STUFF AND WHAT YOU HUSBAND HAS TOLD YOU.

What should you do instead?

Beg him, ask him to tell you what you can do to please him more, tell him you will do anything. . . anything as long as he does not leave you and when he says he still isn't interested, what should you do? Why, you beg some more, okay?

Okay.

What in the world is Uncle Kanto going on about? Oh Diversionary tactics, eh? You sly man you! I gotcha! 

Wake me up when you wanna discuss movie making and how Nollywood is making mockery of it, mmmmkay!

Until then, it's snoresville for moi!  https://forum.surfthechannel.com/style_emoticons/default/zzz.gif

Wait. . . did you say something about schools? Okay, Okay, I'll give you that one. Yes, we need to provide good schools seeing as majority of the Nollywood movies out there look like they were made by illiterates!

Nice Idea Kanto, really nice! Well done!. . . and some people thought you wouldn't come around to seeing things our way! 

Jakumo:
Eat your heart out Los Angeles, because Rodeo Drive will NEVER be as scenic as these breath-taking pictures of Nigeria's shopping malls , and the same goes to you, London, because Oxford Street will NEVER be able to boast of a central brown-water CANAL deep enough to float the boat of customers who choose to shop from the seat of their Kawasaki jet-skis or recreational canoes.

I note with great pride the botanical gardens tastefully planted on the roofs several hovels in the foregoing pictures.  This environmentally friendly concept of combining avant-garde architecture with roof-top greenhouse gas-absorbing gardens is only BEGINNING to be explored in the West and Far East, obviously with inspiration sparked during furtive espionage trips by foreign architects to Nigeria, where visionary urban-planning concepts are invented daily.

Ayep! Going Green - Ariaria Market was there first!

And We di'n't need no stinking Ex VP to make a ridiculously expensive movie to tell us.

Woo! Wooo!!

Sarah Palin is many things. . . a mom, a hockey mom, a woman whose son is in The Eye-raq mom, woman with a pregnant 17 years old mom, Moose hunting, library book burning mom, a governor and now a MUSE. She Inspires people to do things they never thought they would.

What a woman! What a woman! What a might fine woman!

Enjoy!

[flash=425,344]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7DIc8jdra0o&hl=en&fs=1[/flash]


Queen_Plus. . . you future Canada Neighbors

Yes! Yes! I found the perfect article to start us off or rather, continue from where Vesc started. Ironically, his first point - FUNDING is one of the two major problems the writer of this article mentioned!

Brilliant!!!

[QUOTE][B]THE FLAWS IN NIGERIA MOVIES[/B]

As a movie critic for I have seen more than a thousand Nigerian movies since the end of the 90s and I am very often asked why Nigerian movies are so poorly produced and executed.

Don’t get me wrong, I have laughed, cried, screamed and learned a bunch from a couple of great movies that remain the reference till today in Nollywood history, to name but a few: The Price, The Intruder, The Issakaba franchises, Little Angel, Old School.

There are two kinds of flaws that rampage the quality of Nigerian movies:

- the lack of funds and technical knowledge that hamper movies in the fields of sound and image, special effects, scenes choreography and structure, and so on. . . 

- the lack of creativity and the greed to push to the market a movie that is a carbon copy of another or develop a theme already seen a million times before and counting.

The ride will be long and chaotic, so fasten your seatbelts, here we go:

Introduction at the beginning
Is always way too long, it sometimes takes a third of the space on the disc to advertise other movies from the same production house. The advertising guy sounds like he has 2 minutes to read an A4 sheet and at the same time the house is coming down because the roof is on fire. He has to get out of there in 1 and a half minutes or he’s dead!

The beginning of Part 2 usually has 15 minutes of part 1 before it properly starts. Just put on a Hallmark production and you’ll see my point.

The soundtrack: Headache alert!
It plays continuously over the dialogues to the point that at times the viewer doesn’t understand a word that is being said.

The Themes
They are repeated times and times over to the point that the viewer can just see the title, listen to the soundtrack and just five minutes into the movie, they know already where the storyline is heading to.

How many times is a bored married woman going to get an accident and fall madly in love with the passerby/doctor/mechanic who comes to her rescue?

How many times will a rich man/woman conspire to have their offspring marry the rich offspring of their friend/business partner/political godfather?

How many times will a match made in heaven be undermined by trouble brewed by the boy/girl best friend?

How many times is a woman in love going to finance the wellbeing of her jobless, parasite boyfriend who will eventually abandon her? How many times?

Action/Thrillers
The fighting scenes and the shooting scenes are poorly choreographed and amateurish. Action heroes in Hollywood are also masters of martial arts which takes time and discipline to learn, you don’t improvise that. Gunshots sound like firecrackers.

Punches and kicks sound like they have been stolen from scenes from other movies.

Actors
For the great majority of them, they lack formal and basic training in voice coaching, body language, and impersonation of the character. They don’t feel their characters and don’t play them convincingly either.

Acting is a formal training, a great figure or a cute face are far from enough to be a credible actor or actress.

In “Touch My Heart”, Desmond Elliot plays a loud and rowdy illiterate to the perfection. He really became that man and who is totally opposite to the person Desmond is, and despite all his flaws, the viewer comes to feel empathy for him. That’s what acting is all about! More examples: RMD in “The Price”, Stella Damasus-Aboderin in “Standing Alone”, and Patience Ozokwor in “Old School”.

Sex, sex, sex
It has become indispensable to the narration of every story, and rather too much of it than too little. It is for the most part senseless sex that the storyline doesn’t justify. It is either sex between lovers or sex for money between pot-bellied middle-aged fools and girls the age of their (grand) daughters.

Why can’t a man and a woman be lovers without jumping in bed with one another? Isn’t there anything else lovers ever do? Is sex the only means of communication between lovers?


Rape and pregnancy
Rape scenes abound and there seems to be a general rule to it: the girl gets pregnant. In almost 90% of the cases. And when a woman is pregnant, she “must” have morning sickness.

Problem here is that a pregnant woman gets sick in the middle of the day. The nauseous state at the beginning of the pregnancy is called morning sickness for a reason, it gets the woman out of bed in the morning. The nausea can continue throughout the day, but as a general rule, it happens in the morning, before a woman is out of bed. Ask your wives and sisters! Then again, some actresses are mothers and know that all too well, still they play pregnant women who have nausea in the middle of the afternoon.

Part 1 - 2 - 3.
Stories drag on unnecessarily for the sake of selling more cds/vcds. The popular fashion of making 3 parts to a story has proportionally decreased the viewing pleasure. “Standing Order” is the most grueling, senseless piece of nothing I ever sat down to watch 9 hours long! People, 9 hours long!

Spelling Mistakes
Does anybody ever review the finished product before pushing it out to the masses? Actors names are very often grossly misspelled in the credits and subtitles are a serious hazard to your health.

Since 2006, the fashion is to put the summary of the story on the cover. Really? Has anybody ever tried to figure out that garbage? Syntax nonsense and spelling mistakes will kill you before you ever get there! Don’t even try!


Editing Mistakes
In “The Intruder”, Rita Dominic is talking about Chief Jacobs calling him Chief Douglas who was another character in the story. Sometimes, actors call fellow actors by their real names or by someone else’s name. Continuity!!! It also happens that the title in the movie is not the same on the cover. The movie “The Invisible man” is called so on the cover, but is “The Invincible man” in the movie. Go figure!

Fake Accents
When an actor is given a part of someone returning home from abroad, they feel that they have to fake the American or English accent. Mike Ezuruonye in “Beyond Reason”, Bob Manuel Udokwu and Oge Okoye in “Beyond Dreams”.


Storyline
A movie hardly ever keeps the same storyline from begin to finish. A story that began as a money ritual movie ends as a Christian movie (Dwelling in Darkness and Sorrow)and a Christian story ends as a money ritual movie.(Bless Me)

The boxing in of the actors
Patience Ozokwor is the evil mother (in-law), King Joe Okechukwu is the pastor who speaks in tongues, Kanayo O. Kanayo is the cultist, Benita Nzeribe is the husband snatcher, Clarion Chukurah is the prostitute, Chioma Chukwuka is the nice girl, Rita Dominic loves rich older married men, Mike Ezuruonye throws tantrums and slaps women around, Genevieve Nnaji is the high-class, expensive call girl, etc,


Make-up, wigs and garments
The circus is in town! Women have their faces made up like clowns with sometimes each eye brow in its own colour! Eucharia Anunobi-Ekwu is a specialist at this kind of nonsense. Wigs and hairpieces are a national disaster and look like bird nests on a rainy day!

Granted the fashion these days is low waist. Does that mean the viewer has to get dizzy roller-coasting up and down the fat rolls on the hips and buns of Uche Jombo and Monalisa Chinda to name but a few?

Actress get sausaged in tight outfits that don’t fit their generous shapes and make them look outright ridiculous while they could be regal in African attires. Do they sign a clause in their contracts that forbids them from wearing African attires?

You said International Film Award?
How can an industry that churns out an average of 300 movies on a year basis not be represented nor win any prestigious International Film Award? You said The Cannes Festival? The Oscars? Or even Fespaco?

If movies like Sarafina, Blood Diamonds, Hotel Rwanda, or the recent The Last King of Scotland have proudly represented the continent and won international awards as well, why can’t we? It’s high time we put our money where our
mouths are.

Husbands
They are always right and they always get away with all the evil they ever commit against women. A man will chase his wife away from his home for 3 years, and marry someone else who will off course disappoint him. In the meantime, the wife is beating the path to the local church every hour of the day and praying and fasting continuously to get back her cheating, back-stabbing husband. All he has to say, but it’s not compulsory, is that he is sorry. And she’ll come back running with the blessings of her family and this will be a day of great joy for her. She’ll confess to him that she never lost hope while he was enjoying himself with someone else.

In “Naked Sin”, Bob-Manuel Udokwu rapes the dead body of Chioma Chukwuka who not only gets pregnant in the process, but also sees an act of salvation in it!

In “Games Men Play”, the same Bob-Manuel Udokwu plots the rape of his own wife, the same Chioma Chukwuka who eventually forgives him because he’s sorry! Next, please!

Women
Should an alien come down to Earth and watch exclusively Nigerian movies, what do you think they would go back to tell their folks about Nigerian women? Women are mostly cast in a negative light that portrays them as dumb, submissive, nymphomaniac, slaves, immoral, and greedy gold-diggers.

The minute a woman gets a man, the only thing on her mind is to get him to marry her the fastest  way possible and she will stop at nothing to make that happen. All the women in her direct entourage have nothing else in mind but to snatch him away from her by all means.

Her mother, sisters, best friends, colleagues and even her housemaid are now a threat, they all become her worst enemy. Women walk around hunting for men to marry them at any cost.

In “Honey Desire”, a single mother and educated woman with a comfortable situation throws herself at an illiterate street bum who can’t tell his left from his right.

She fights tooth and nails to keep the idiot to herself and even fights her own daughter who off course throws herself at him as well. And since the bum thinks with his third leg anyway, he gets himself the best of both worlds by taking them both to bed and eventually abandoning them later. A woman who’s kind, a true friend and a caretaker of another woman is always a victim.

The Bible Says
Every time a husband is facing domestic problems with his wife, that he would call insubordination, the next thing you hear him say is :”The Bible says…”

The Holy Book is the ultimate justification for all the evil men commit against their women and it’s an incredibly powerful tool to keep them submissive and obedient.

As far as I know, the Bible was exclusively written by men, there isn’t a single line in it that was ever written by a woman, let alone a verse. Is it that back in those days women couldn’t read nor write?[/QUOTE]

You can read the comments about this article here

http://nigeriamovies.net/news/news181.php

@Vesc
Nah, we are bring out the big guns for this. LET THE REVOLUTION BEGIN!!!
https://forum.surfthechannel.com/style_emoticons/default/fireworks.gif https://forum.surfthechannel.com/style_emoticons/default/fireworks.gif https://forum.surfthechannel.com/style_emoticons/default/fireworks.gif

Lmao! You are a glass half full person, aren't you?

Major rant ahead, so if reading other people’s rant is not your cup of tea, please look away now.

Thanks.

Question – Do Nollywood Directors think the audience is daft? Do they think we don’t get subtlety or is about them not knowing there is such a thing as not choking the audience with too much information?

What am I talking about? I’ll tell you.

I just saw a movie with Ramsey Noauh called Passionate Appeal. In this movie, whathisface is the leader of a blackmailing ring. He sleeps with rich bored housewives whose husbands seem to have gone to the same “How to be a successful but neglectful husband” school.

In the first scenes they established how whathisface and his gang of merry blackmailers operate. They have a girl who works in a salon where rich women go do their hair, after these women are all “did up” she tries to find out about their marital status by paying them a compliment.

Girl Blackmailer – Wow, madam you look beautiful.
Rich bored madam (preening) – Oh thank you.
GB – This will sure turn your husband’s head.
RBM (smile turned down) - My Husband? Will he even notice?
GB – What do you mean?
RBM – He is a busy man, he never has time for me oh….blah, blah, blah

Bam! They have their would be victim.

First of all, how contrived is that? Which woman goes around blasting the news that her husband does not have time for her? Normal women will smile their thanks and indulge in fantasy that as soon as they get home, their husband will be so taken by their beauty, he turns into a drooling caveman but for Nollywood purposes, all women are blabber mouths.

Moving on. . .

As soon as the woman leaves, GB goes outside, calls her boss, describe what just transpired, she tells him how to find the woman and he starts setting the trap. Runs into her a few times, pretends he is in a bad relationship with his wife, basically charms the pant off these women. . . literally and because they are rich bored housewives, they fall like a ton of bricks. When they finally have sex, he has it taped and the tape or picture is sent to the woman for blackmail. To throw suspicion off him, he pretends he is also being blackmailed but unlike the rich madams, he doesn’t have the money. The women pay and pay and pay some more.

There you have it, their plan, so easy, so simple even a two years old can understand it. . . right?

So pray tell. . . why they feel the need to repeat the process over and over and over again? Do they think we are stupid or we have short term memory? Do they think if we don’t see how they got Madam B, we will, scratch our heads, squint our eyes and say “Hey, me know understanding whati are happen here…how did they get her” even though we’ve already seen the process at work on Madam A?

You remember earlier I mentioned, GB calls her boss whenever she finds a suitable victim. What I didn’t tell you is she repeats word for word what just happened. . . something we already know. Helloooooo Producers, we have brains and it works. We don’t need to hear her tell him to know what she is telling him. Jeebus! How about fading out as soon as she picks up her phone and start dialing?

Every Scene should give the audience something new!

Don’t show us 10 scenes of a woman pacing up and down telling us 100 times she is worried about her child, once is enough. Matter of fact don’t even let her open her mouth, her acting should be enough to let us know why she is pacing. Besides, we’ve been following the story. . . we are not daft, so if her child was behaving in a reckless manner all through, we will know she is pacing because she is worried about him.

Don’t show us 20 scenes of a husband being an arrogant bastard to tell us he is an arrogant bastard.

Don’t show us 50 scenes of the house girl eavesdropping to tell us she lacks manners.

What am I saying Nollywood Producers? Simple – Treat us like we have brains!!!!!!

Oh one last thing, why is it that there is never a realistic balance in the portrayal of characters? Why is everything always to the extreme?

A busy man is a busy man is a busy man.

A naïve wife is a naïve wife is a naïve wife.

A wicked mother in law is a wicked mother in law is a wicked mother in law.

The good is EXTREMELY good and the bad is EXTREMELY bad.

Life is not like that! It is not black or white, there are shades of grey and it is in the shades of grey the drama lies!

A ball bursting, devil may care, career oriented woman with a soft spot for children.

An arrogant male chauvinist, who cares deeply for the old woman living next door.

The juxtaposing of two opposite elements in a character and showing him bounce back and forth is DRAMA!! 

Human beings are complex and you. . . Nollywood Directors do us a great disservice when you reduce your characters to one note Janes and Johns

End Rant.

*Breathes out*

Wow! This is a huge testimony.

Thank God for sparing you and your son's life.

[quote author=plus_Queen link=topic=178478.msg2886734#msg2886734 date=1223003463]I sat on the ground all through so I don't shout and fall and break a body part.
It was showtime at the apollo
I tell ya[/quote]LMAO! Good thinking.

[quote author=davidylan* link=topic=178478.msg2886739#msg2886739 date=1223003593]who is Joe six-pack? 
Is he a hockey dad?[/quote]Your Average Joe now. . . you know the one who drinks six pack (American) he keeps cold in a homemade ice bucket in the garage. Joe watches football with his friends on his front lawn and chows down on frozen pizza over the kitchen sink . . that Joe Six pack!

maxell:
lol.

At one point she said "I have only been at this for only 5 weeks" and then switched the answer to something else.

LMAO! Only that? What about "I'm a washington outsider" ^{[Insert Cutesy Aww, shucks giggle here]}

My British cousin is watching with me and she kept asking. . . "Am I not getting what she is saying because I am not American and I don't know the issues or am I just dense? I had to reassure her that even Americans who know the issues don't get her! LMAO! Poor thing thought her brain had turned to mush.

I about fell off the chair laughing when Biden said this. . . .

"I would compare mine and Barack's record against McCains and anybody else."

ZING! ZING! ZING!!!

Rotflmao! What a way to DISMISS her!