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SwagguElite's Posts

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Car TalkRe: DRIVING Tips:what To Do If The Road Is Flooded by swagguElite(m): 7:27am On Jul 24, 2017
You can never know when a rainfall will turn to a flood _I hv been in an area where rain fell for good 5hrs _there was no flood! _bcos of good drainage system n

No one would ever reason whether the area where he parked his car is prone to flood or has a poor drainage system! _unless anytime yu park _yu jog down to where the gutter to check if the gutter is filled up with dirt or not!

The OP made some useful tips _nice job! Bro _its just that yu can never see it when its coming! smiley
SportsRe: Nigerian Water SKI & Wakeboard Federation To Establish Facilities For Training by swagguElite(m): 10:09pm On Jul 22, 2017
henryvirus:
Yinmu... Wastage of funds.... How many people do the sport... Wait sef How many people even know of its existence....... Strolls out with toothpick in my mouth
n!gga _fuck ourra here! grin cool
RomanceRe: Ladies And Guys Rate My Handsomeness On A Scale Of 100 by swagguElite(m): 10:49am On Jul 21, 2017
urvillagepeoplee:
I can never be a bro to an asslicking snitch like you that will asslick a girl and run me down when I need you most,now buzz off and go work on your personality. Humpty Dumpty..
thank you Sir! _God bless you Sir!
RomanceRe: Ladies And Guys Rate My Handsomeness On A Scale Of 100 by swagguElite(m): 10:03am On Jul 21, 2017
urvillagepeoplee:
And you think you just passed English language on your waec with this your spaced up writing, use of underscores and lack of correct punctuation marks usage,you can't comprehend anything I say because you are a typical demented dullard, you are not even man enough to woo a lady straight forward without asslicking her, guys like you always take advantage of their fellow guys downfall to woo their girlfriend behind them. you are a snitch and should be avoided. weakling, who wants to know about the dirty girl that got pregnant for you and you are here claiming engagement, is it you that could only afford 3 curtains of 150naira or the 5½ ceilings of 100naira carpet you were able to afford to cover your untiled floor or your uncles burial shirt you are putting to avoid being shirtless that is deceiving you that you are engaged,who dash you money for engagement ring?
keep snitching and asslicking people's girlfriends till they put a bullet in your sharp skull. ode for life. gerarahere mhennn...
yea _yea! Thanks for the compliments bro! _yuar too nice! _hv a lovely day! smiley kiss
RomanceRe: Ladies And Guys Rate My Handsomeness On A Scale Of 100 by swagguElite(m): 8:56am On Jul 21, 2017
urvillagepeoplee:
now I know u are more dumber than I thought, if it were to be an an examination you would have failed woefully because what u just did amount to copying from someone who asked for an extra sheet because to you,the person is very clever. Someone jumped out of line from a simple question asked to humiliating a fellow guy like you with a freaking write up,did the guy asked her if she will date him? was the post in anyway directed to her personally to ask her of her opinion of dating the guy or not? even if the guy effed up by putting up such post,must you insult him rather than advise him or just close the thread after viewing, haven't you heard the saying"never hit a man when he is down", every man has got his pride,u are a guy too and ought to know better,one opinion doesn't win a judgment,even if one girl took the post personal and insulted him,4 more other girls will find him attractive. don't ever join a lady to criticize a fellow brother no matter what,just advise and leave,nobody is perfect, if u don't like fair people,create your own black people if you are the God that creates people. its obvious u don't have a girlfriend that will inculcate some useful common sense into ur dumb Sahara desert skull, no wonder u have started developing bald head at ur young age, stop trying to prove you are intelligent because you are just a dullard with an irrational I.q without any sense of humor. go sit ur black ass down and learn some cyber manners rather than ass licking and chasing little girls who keep wearing one pants per week thinking you got many chicks at ur beck and call. bounce..
grin grin grin _so because the OP is a guy I should protect his pride _I dnt owe him any duty to do such! _n you don't tell me what to do! _I heard yu;say cyber manners! _your I.Q is as low as my body temperature!

_yu came here bringing up issues that are not worth mentioning _even attacking me personally! _bringing up yur presumption that I dnt hv a girlfriend that's the reason why I wrote wat I wrote! ;ao old is this chap?_it won't b Worth it boasting to you about me being engaged with a lady! _yu don't deserve such info! _a dullard _no sense humour _ that I joined a lady to criticise a brother _that am a guy I ought to know better!

So are you done? _since yuar so pained based on my collab with a sister to share my opinion! _yur writeup shows yuar not sensible as yu pose to be! _baseless claims _well disorganised work!_ I can hardly read anything yu wrote! _it shows yu too rough! _no spacing yu just jampark evrytin together

_speaking out with pain! _like yuar her ex_boifrnd or some random sh!tty guy who has been lost in agony n hv nothing meaningful to do!

Yu know what bro! _that lady ass yu say am licking _I would lick it! _kill myself there n in case I survive the asslicking I will search for her parents are pay all the damn bride price!

N yu my Frnd! Could go hug a Transformer! On top my matter _I wouldn't gv a flying fvck! _I would lick that ass! _no matter what _I stay faithful there _ thats why am begging yu now pls _pls _kill yourself! kiss
RomanceRe: Ladies And Guys Rate My Handsomeness On A Scale Of 100 by swagguElite(m): 2:35am On Jul 21, 2017
ask4cyrra:
warriz dis one sayinghuh woman wrapper
checkout this dumbass! _ grin grin grin one blowjab could hv ended yur dumb bloodline from filling earth's precious space!

I admire sensible women! _bcos yu don't _doesn't make everyone like you! _Op's relative! _getting pained because a woman lashed out the truth! _Get yur life together Boi!
RomanceRe: Ladies And Guys Rate My Handsomeness On A Scale Of 100 by swagguElite(m): 2:23am On Jul 21, 2017
urvillagepeoplee:
ur ass licking just showed the kinda guy u are,sumbody like u can beat up his mom because of a bitch u call girlfriend. A slowpoke jumped out of the subject of discussion and started spilling rubbish like a demented yaba left escaped patient and you are here bringing down a fellow guy like u because of a girl u have never known just because she has one stinking hole bw her legs that u will never see talk less of inserting ur fragile deek into. I wonder when some guys will actually grow sense and start behaving maturely,anytime they see any female moniker, they start ass licking like he goats,hyping the nonsense she post and start foaming in the mouth like a castrated epileptic porcupine. I am waiting for ur quote so that I can talk some sense into u and remove the spirit of ass licking from ur life b4 one olosho turn ur brain against ur family in d near future.
grin grin grin its funny ao people think when yu support a woman ...you are doing it to get her to like you or want to get into contact with her! _i didnt open my account to do that! _they're obviously so many ways to get a girl than doing that!

I support her view! _the guy has definitely no special attribute to me! _he looks like a random broke guy seeking for people's opinion on his facial looks! _hu ever does dat he's not proud of himself! _yuar not a lady yuar a guy! _yu nid to chase after the good looks of money not your freaking face! _hu cares about your face!

Personally _I dnt like guys hu ar too light! _its either he's either too light;bleached or used a filter! ...either case he is too light n pretty much looks like a cotton bud to me!

He asked for an opinion the girl gave a well treated flow vis-à-vis truthful stream of herThoughtfulOpinion! _which I admired!

Considering the fact she gave him a truthful undiluted reply! _yu can never get a truthful idea of how sexy or cute yu look without asking a girl who is not your close frnd! _most times close female frnds say tins just to impress you n not the true things about so when

...you sight a lady who gives her pure opinion yu need to appreciate it since if she was your friend she wouldn't have given such opinion so as not to hurt your feelings!

So if yu think I opened an account to ass lick a girl! _yuar as dumb as fvck! _ladies are the least of my problems right now! _I dnt pursue punana _I pursue value! N dat lady possess the right amount _I hv so many female friends so I know when a lady is being truthful with you!

#So b!tch be humble _sit down! undecided
FamilyRe: My Wife And Her Ex Issue. by swagguElite(m): 2:48pm On Jul 20, 2017
...women never get scared of their exes! _Unlike men who would turn the other way when they see their exes! ..for reasons known to them!

In this case your wife is scared of her ex! ...maybe becos he might be the first guy in her life that took her virginity

_yea!_ ladies whose exes took their virginity hardly get in contact with them again because since the guy tricked dem into get them laid n dumping dem later on_ they believe the guy has carried their problems n want to move on with their lives without having anything to do with the guy again!

OR maybe _your wife might hv been seeing her Ex while you guys are still married! ...coz think about it why would she be scared of her Ex being around! _if not that she doesn't want you or the guy to be close ...so has not to reveal anytin she might have done that would hurt you in any way!

Don't sweet talk her into telling you anything! _if she wanted she woud hv done so! ...she's either waiting for the right time or doesn't want to tell you sh!t.

So! _dnt hold any grudges against her Ex instead find a way to meet him! _n be cool with him! _matured guys don't fight with anoda guy over a girl! ...it doesn't happen! _we are not ladies!

Personally! _if I know the ex of my girlfriend I will hv to meet him n let him know that just because am dating your Ex doesn't mean we should be fighting!

Get closer n watch your wife tremble with fear! _that's if she has anything to hide! ..n trust me that way of getting closer with her Ex! _she would stop talking to the Ex about your family issues

_coz she wouldn't trust the ex again with her secrets since evrytin minute yuar not at home she will thinking yuar with her Ex getting information about her from him!

That aside! _invite him for dinner at your home ...just say your Friend is coming over in the evening for dinner! ...dnt let her know!

_I want you to take note of this step! _if she gets to know that her Ex is one coming without you telling her _It means her Ex has told her he is coming n dats shows that their connection has not being broken yet! _this is just a test to know if they still both speak to one another!

Also _if the Ex decides to refuse your offer _influence him to come by all means _you could try teasing him that he is still scared of his Ex that's why he doesn't want to come! _am very sure he would want to prove that he is not scared n might come ...if not _try other means!

Thats is that about that! _In case your wife starts complaining of your closeness with him! _tell her that you just trying to get advice from since she decides to discuss your family matters with her Ex!

_that way she will discourage you to stop asking advicea from him n you as a good husband at that point tell her to stop discussing yu guys issues with her Ex! ...she definitely agree! _But don't stop there _also tell her that in case she decides to keep telling her Ex evrytin! _you will get to know because her Ex tells you evrytin!

At moment! _she will want to know what her Ex has been telling you! ... Just tell her to prepare you a meal before you start talking because you hv a lot to tell her! _just watch ao she will prepare a Goddamn finger licking meal!

After then _tell her to grab a chair n listen to you carefully! ...coz yuar not repeating any word! _"Now say promise me you will tell your Ex I told you these things oo!"

She will nod like agama lizard ...now drag her head n whisper to her ears ...saying "your Ex said that I have a nice smile! ...is he gay?"

Bros! _Protect your ear in case of a slap! grin grin smiley grin
CrimeRe: Angry Wife Puts Pepper In The Vagina Of Her Husband's Side Chick (photos) by swagguElite(m): 2:06pm On Jul 20, 2017
grin grin grin pussy has no right! _but she has rights that's if she can overcome the shame of telling to the court wat she had done that got her served with some chilled pepper pizza down her other mouth!
RomanceRe: Nigerian Girl Claims She Swallows Undiluted Sperm To Expand Her Hips by swagguElite(m): 1:54pm On Jul 20, 2017
cheesy dem badt guys don scoop This girl finish _telling her dat tale that are hips will increase if she sucks n swallow!

Me though! ...dnt gv a fvck if there anytin like diluted or undiluted! _I just nid a girl dat can suck n swallow! _wats the point of suvking if yu won't swallow ..unless yuar going to wash my rug n bedsheet after the showdown! _of which I hate! _yu swallowing takes care of evrytin!

So am good to go in any no-sex relationship if yu can suck n swallow! _sex is damn overrated _dnt nid it! tongue
RomanceRe: Some Things Every Women Must Do After Intercourse by swagguElite(m): 1:42pm On Jul 20, 2017
So girls don't really wash the V with soap n water! ....damn! _hv done tins _I shouldnt hv done! embarassed
RomanceRe: Ladies And Guys Rate My Handsomeness On A Scale Of 100 by swagguElite(m): 1:10pm On Jul 20, 2017
Zarqabe:
you dont look mature. you look like a jambite. you don't have beards and ur moustache was shaved badly. beards make men look more matured and more attractive. You arent ugly but you aren't good looking either. I wouldnt look at you twice if i walked past you on the streets. nothing special about your looks. you look too average. you are not the kind of guy I would imagine kissing or having sex with. You have no sex appeal. You aren't the kind of guy I would be proud to show off to my friends as my boyfriend. I wouldn't even date you.

you wanted an honest response and I have given you one.
yeah! _yu deserve more likes! ...perfect analysis! _yu would be a good problem solver! _I admire ladies who will look yu in d eye ...n tell you bro! _you look like sh!t.

"Yu have no sex appeal!" grin _am sure that would make O.p weak! _n keep him looking at his mirror until he focuses on what he can offer to his society n nt his looks! _fvck ourrae here couz! sad
EducationRe: SHOCKING: Two Big Snakes Killed In Unilorin COHS New Hostel (PHOTOS) by swagguElite(m): 12:56pm On Jul 20, 2017
Damn! ...these snakes are beautiful! _I kinda nid their skin for the pouch to my phone! smiley
RomanceRe: I Did Not Know How The Thing Entered....chioma. by swagguElite(m): 12:43pm On Jul 20, 2017
Why is it a crime to sell babies sef? _they are the owner of their tin _they should b allowed to sell to a better financially buoyant parent to take care of the child! ...most of these children are better off living without their "never wanted to get a baby" mother

Ao do yu expect a woman who says she didn't know when the thing entered her to care for a child dat came from her because she didn't know! _I just pity d baby!

These are the kinds of mother that flog their children with a hot pressed iron for eating her food that she hid in the cupboard! undecided
RomanceRe: Ladies, Would You Rock This Crazy One Piece Jumpsuit To A Party (photo)? by swagguElite(m): 12:30pm On Jul 20, 2017
To those of you saying "eeewwww _see her tummy!"

_yea hv seen it n I can use my leg to beat my chest n say that her tummy has two packs upper; a dimple n a curvy ass! grin _wat amazing tummy she's got!
RomanceRe: True Love! Lady Shows Off Her Chubby Boyfriend (photos) by swagguElite(m): 12:24pm On Jul 20, 2017
cerowo:
Is that how she would be changing her boyfriends picture if they suddenly break up.
I dnt buy that idea of a girl putting up her bf photo on her walls on social media, because anything can happen b/w both of them.
Buh i dnt mind though, if he put mine sha grin
grin grin grin yu don't mind if he puts you own! _see your mouth! _yeye Gurl!
RomanceRe: At What Age Does A Man's Manhood Stop Growing? by swagguElite(m): 11:35am On Jul 20, 2017
The age at which yu last got a blowjab! _get lots of blowjab from dem b!etches n yu will get additional growth!

Blowjab is the easier less stressful n cheapest form of exercise! _ f!ek yoga _get a blowjab!

Prescription: Four blowjabs per week for a month! _yur blackhammer would be as long as this thread

https://www.nairaland.com/871307/official-manchester-united-fan-thread

grin grin grin
Technology MarketRe: UK Used HTC One M9 For Sale by swagguElite(m): 9:48am On Jul 18, 2017
FrancisAdl:
Bro this phone is worth more than that, don't be a desperate seller. I use it and it's one of the best android phones I've used till date. It has everything!!!
C'mon this is HTC! _ The phone is dope! _no doubt _ But it has evrytin with Battery Capacity of 2840mAh _ fvck ourra here!
Technology MarketRe: UK Used HTC One M9 For Sale by swagguElite(m): 1:16am On Jul 18, 2017
48k? kiss
FoodRe: "Semo Turns To Rubber After A Woman Mixed It With Hot Water In Benue" (Photos) by swagguElite(m): 12:59am On Jul 18, 2017
Gawddamn! _yu call that rubber _honestly I hv to be plastic with you _yu nid a new chef! kiss grin
PhonesRe: Which Do You Prefer: Lasting Battery Or Good Camera? by swagguElite(m): 12:51am On Jul 18, 2017
dotedote:
OUKITEL K10000 AND OUKITEL K10000 PRO
10000mAh cheesy _ that power bank _ sorry phone would be heavy as fvck!
PhonesRe: Which Do You Prefer: Lasting Battery Or Good Camera? by swagguElite(m): 12:46am On Jul 18, 2017
Currently using the Gionee m5 _I hv no regrets buying the phone based on my thrilling battery ferocious need!

But trust me am tired of seeing my phone not dying grin! ...I want to use a camera phone with anyhow battery like Gionee A1 _probably it could teach me to be humble n respect phones with good battery!

Nothing remains sweet forever _the same billionaires who would kill for a RollsRoyce ; later after getting the wealth n the Car _ will prefer a vintage car which is as old as fvck! _crazy world mehn! smiley
CrimeRe: Autopsy Of A Drug Mule: Stay Out Of Hard Drugs (Viewers Discretion Advised) by swagguElite(m): 12:29am On Jul 18, 2017
I salute the ladies viewing this thread! _damn! _if yu hv the balls to watch this _ yu hv the balls to handle any goddamn man who tries to lay his hands on you!

Never underestimate the power within!_ it costs to be too gentle! wink
PoliticsRe: Popular Artiste Goes Through Surgery, Puts Horns On His Head (photos) by swagguElite(m): 12:12am On Jul 18, 2017
Of course! _the hoe is going bald n wat oda way can he get his hair insured _if not with horns!

_am veri sure his friends would like his new horns yea _ that's if it came with a free WiFi! _in Africa nothing is bad if it favours some people! smiley
EducationRe: 10 Things That Will Disappear Forever If The Bees Die by swagguElite(m):
yrex01:
In short der won't b us without em simple!!
When the bees are gone _we will miss dem sure but they will miss us too_without us their hustle will be a waste

Just imagine the bees producing honey n no humans to consume them to the fullest! (Forget bears! They only consume honey when they are h'orny) _Earth would have being another moon _honeymoon grin
Nairaland GeneralRe: Today Is Seun Osewa Birthday...let's Show Him Love (post Your Greetings) by swagguElite(m): 11:48am On Jul 17, 2017
Happi Birthdai to the young man! _Osewa Seun cool
#wishing_yu
#MoreMerryYears
EducationRe: Nigerian Lady With Masters In Law From A UK University Offered N35k As Salary by swagguElite(m): 6:48pm On Jul 16, 2017
isaacola57:
Nigerians and jealousy.. U think its easy to study in UK..If u studied abroad u deserve more than a Nigerian schooled..if it was easy everybody would do it
Deep suited erroneous statement from you! ... As a lawyer from UK _tell me what law are you going to be taught there ...isn't it UK's law!

Is UK's law n regulations similar with Nigerian legislations ....we might have borrowed their principles of Equity n certain doctrines of common law ...but dat doesn't mean we operate the same legal system!

Anyone who studies abroad n wishes to practise in Nigeria _according to the Legal Practitioners Act is expected to apply for a law school programme of two years _instead of one year applicable to law students who studied in Nigeria!

The reason for the additional months for abroad law students is for them to be grinded with the flour of our local laws n legislations! i.e they spend one year learning what Nigerian law students spent 5 years learning in their various universities! _So tell me what's the essence of studying law abroad if yuar still coming back to practise in Nigeria!

But in this case! _she attended her law school in the UK _a reasonable person should have laid his thoughts into practising in the UK! ..Nd not in Nigeria!

Except she came with an intention of using her abroad education to influence law chambers into granting her a big position n heavy steroid pills of money as her salaries! _We are lawyers we are aware of the banes of studying abroad n coming to practice in Nigeria! _so there is no way yuar in a better position than a Nigerian law student well groomed in our laws for 5years in the university n 1year in the Nigerian Law school!

Thus; you should know that it could be a different result for other departments such as political science or sociology to study abroad n be treated specially when he or she returns back home! _In law it is quite very different! _Bro!
EducationRe: The Worst Pharmacy student Is Better Than The Best In Any Other Faculty by swagguElite(m): 10:28pm On Jul 15, 2017
DABMarkNig2019:
How true is the saying?
I attended a pharmacy induction ceremony yesterday at the university of Jos where the executive secretary of the west African post graduate college of pharmacist and professor of toxicology prof. Noel Wannang made the assertion that the worst pharmacy student is better than the best elsewhere. His reason being that in the training of pharmacist, the pass mark required for student pharmacists is 50% and in some other courses 60% is required as the benchmark.
Pastor Noel Whatever based his decision on the appraisal of marks over intelligence!

_wat a big deal of foolishness! _hu cannot la cramme n la pour n get 80% in any field! _your selling point is nothing but your level of intelligence! _Brilliant students end becoming famous architects of great results but would never acquire the breathtaking achievement of an enthusiastic intellectual person!

Nd moreover; he said it in a ceremony! ... It is quite normal for such a situation! _that statement was just to boost their morale n not to look down on themselves for getting a poor result!

_ so looking at it in both direction the speaker deserves to be shot _with prompt mercy! ...it is not his fault ...he was trying to encourage the poor graded students!
EducationRe: Nigerian Lady With Masters In Law From A UK University Offered N35k As Salary by swagguElite(m): 11:23pm On Jul 14, 2017
MrBrownJay1:
ARRANT NONSENSE!!!
Each and every employer has the RIGHt to decide what they will offer their employees... And if that UK Master holder doesn't like it then she should go apply for ANOTHER JOB.

The reality is that A) There are many people in Nigerian who will accept this job, B) there are many Locally graduated lawyers who will PERFECTLY do the job required and C) just because someone has a UK master does NOT mean they would do a better job or should receive a better salary.

The top graduated lawyer of any 9ja establishment would be way better than some 50/50 UK master holder
God will bless you! ...n enlarge your knowledge coast! _you analyzed the issue perfectly well! _yu dah bomb! wink
EducationRe: 15 Hottest Courses In Nigerian Universities - Can You Compete? by swagguElite(m): 7:25pm On Jul 14, 2017
ZestAri:
I simply love this your conclusion cool
thanks bruh! wink
CelebritiesRe: This New Photo Of Regina Daniels Shows She Is An Epitome Of Beauty by swagguElite(m): 1:32pm On Jul 13, 2017
bbbabes1:
work hard so i can do same for you
holy cheesy molly! _that was some crazy ass comeback! _damn! ...yu guuud! cheesy
EducationRe: 15 Hottest Courses In Nigerian Universities - Can You Compete? by swagguElite(m): 1:10pm On Jul 13, 2017
dannytoe:
i lost hope when i saw law at 3 place...........op stop doing internet statitics, go outside and see unemployed graduate of those courses you call hottest.
b!tch ...sit down ...be humble! ....law is one of the best courses ever! ...dnt let your hate cloud your judgement!

I dnt see law as a special course above all other courses as it as a Specially Recognized Title! ...yu become lawyer! ... A Barr is added to your name _being a barrister does not determine whether yu will gain employment faster than an accountant _ Or make a superior a wealthy self-employed businessman! ....No! ...

Being a Barrister gives you freedom! ...freedom to go out there to claim any career yu wish to pursue _Falz the Badt guy is f!rkin lawyer ...so as Funke Akindele! .... N yet dat doesn't mean they beta off than their counterparts!

Beta still imagine yourself as a barrister who having being called to bar decided not to practice n continue your Father's Furniture business! ...yu changed his name from Akindele's Furnitures to Barr. Dannytoe Elite Furnitures!

If I were to buy from any of the two! ...I would go for the Barr dannytoe's one _because it would be safer to contract with a lawyer due to the fact it is presumed he would not try to cheat you on the basis that yu can easily get him sued n get his name tainted with bad image since all a lawyer needs to thrive; is a good reputation!

That's their weak spot! ..since you know that _n they know that! _yu would be able to favour yourself off their liability of losing their good reputation!

So Misterman! ... Yu can become a lawyer n dive into any show business or profitable venture of yours but you should know that the title Barrister grants you a favourable ground for obtaining contracts n recognition than any competition you might face in any trade yu deem fit to choose!

You determine who you are; by What you Do! _Not by your career!
#LoveALawyer_ItsLegal
@dannytoe.

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