₦airaland Forum

O boy, if I leave naija, both naija boys and guys are out of my friends lists. The thing is that we are over clouded with the terrible things that some of us are capable of that to build trust will be very difficult. Most africans in diaspora are opportunist on various degrees and no need to lie about that. Some people just want visa and quick bucks and are willing to do anything to make that happen. They create bad impressions that even when someone with a noble heart comes around nobody believes him. Naija boys will meet a white girl or akata babe that loves him, he will scam her and only to return home to marry a naija girl regardless of what has being done for him. For me, to marry an African girl is not by force, whether home based or foreign, I no dey wash pant

Romanoff:
What responsible man comes home late and drunk?

The woman done tire ni and this one that beating and joined, that marriage is already over.

Why do you women think you have the moral high ground to punish a man because he is married to you. If man locks his wife outside because she didn't cook or too much salt in the soup what will be your reaction? Do you know your excesses that men tolerate, or simply ignore? That's why to get married dey fear me, marry person wey go come dey wicked you in your own house. Before they marry them na to pretend them sabi. If I get baby mama I swear anything marriage is out of my agenda

I was in Enugu on Sunday and left on Wednesday. On Monday was the first time I experienced the lockdown, Baba it's serious ooh. Everywhere was shut down, I heard it's twice a week now. It's just suffering and smiling and forming tough for some Igbo. The Igbo governors have lost authority over their own people

Ever Kim Kardashian sextape with Ray J, celebrity nude pics and vids have become sought after, some intentionally do it for cheap fame. Blackmail and extortion are the oldest means of human manipulation most especially if you are a public figure. There is what is called sextortion and revenge pornography. So recording yourself in a sexual explict act is just plain stupidity cos anything can happen. Ever since I watch a movies as a kid where political opponents used a politican's past to force him to step cos he threatened their interest is when I knew that some things should always remain private no matter the urge to flaunt.

Sexual irresponsibility most times lead to violent conflicts. We as humans are pleasure seeking and if the possibility of been caught and punished is low, we do what's on our minds. But people react to things differently. Husbands are expected by society to be breadwinners and feel they have sexual monopoly over there wives. When men's ego are bruised, many resort to physical violence. A cheating wife is the worst thing any man wants to have, because she is dubious and deceptive to keep the affair away from her husband so as to still maintain her marital status. In an era where a lot of married women feel they can pursue their sexual fantasies although still wanting to maintain their marriage, expect more incidences like this. PEOPLE REACT TO THINGS DIFFERENTLY. The devil will advise you to cheat and enjoy orgasm and the devil will still push the person you are cheating on to punish you, or you contact what will affect your health. The modern obsession with orgasm is a threat to society/family balance.

1stGenAmerican:
I don’t understand why you keep speaking of him being accused because that stage is done. He was tried and found guilty.

This was not acquaintance rape. As soon as the child saw him heading her way, she ran and he chased her.

White boys and Catholic priests had nothing to do with this crime.

Did he feel sorry for the child and think about the rest of her life before he raped and sodomized her? Her KILLED this child’s dreams. And he really thought he would see his homeland again because he figured she would be too scared of his threat to kill her to tell. OP thought he would throw her aside in the dirt and keep on moving. By the way he walked to his car, he acted like he had just left a movie or amusement park.

He will never see his homeland again and this child will never see her innocence or live a normal life again.

Commit the crime, do the time.

You sound so sure, like you were in his head. Like you were CSI. Crime is subjective and relative. If you think you are perfect, stay your whole life in your room. Don't ever be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Unfortunate things happen to people, if you have ever had sex with a girl you are not married to, you're going to hell according to Christian theology. He is not perfect neither are you. You guys just want to see someone punished, will it make the world a better place

1stGenAmerican:
There are millions of Black Americans in the US and just because you see a hundred or even a thousand in the audience still does not mean that the majority of us watch those comedians. Not all Black Americans use TikTok, What don’t you understand?
Have you been reading CNN and other news outlets with stories about how trolls on Russian Trollfarms sit on social media pretending to be Black Americans? What I said in my original post is what I stand by.

No one ever said that the Justice System is foolproof but most of the people you see who are released were convicted BEFORE or in the early days of DNA evidence being used in court. OP was convicted based on evidence from an FBI investigation, two different sets of DNA tests, the witnesses’ testimony, and the three different admissions of guilt that he gave to the court.

If you don’t know the details the say so. If you apply for a US visa and state on your application that you will be spending your entire stay in one part of the country but after you overstay your visa you are caught in another area of the country, you are already guilty of breaking the law before you are even charged with your new violent crime.

The op might not be innocent of other crimes doesn't mean he is guilty of what he is accused of. You see, you didn't grow up in a third world country and experienced the struggle that comes with it and the dreams of any person in diaspora. I can't imagine a guy being in a foreign country for the first time and raping a girl just few weeks into his stay. It just doesn't make sense. Acquaintance rape is the highest form of rape compared to stranger rape. Does he have a record for such behavior? 3 life sentences plus 72 years is too harsh. White boys who shoot up the whole school or malls don't get such penalities. We are not defending him, but spending the rest of your life in prison is what makes us sympathize with him. He will never see his homeland again. You don't know what that feels like. Catholic priests do worse but are let off with slap on the wrist

1stGenAmerican:
Perhaps the ignorance is on your part. You are clueless about Black Americans beyond what you see on tv and you are clueless about how the US Justice System works.

Aries Spears, comedians, and the people on Wilding Out don’t represent the majority of Black Americans, most of us don’t even watch them and neither do we sit around making jokes about Nigerians.

I sympathize with neither R. Kelly nor Bill Cosby. R Kelly was found guilty/convicted and must face even more charges in another state, Bill Cosby was not exonerated, he was released on a technicality from a prior case.

You are right, I am not the judge in this matter. OP was given a chance to claim and prove his innocence during his trial however based on evidence presented from both sides, the jury found him guilty.

The judge in this matter was done with this trial when he sentenced OP, banged his gavel, and moved on to the next case. In the US, once a person is convicted, the opportunity to claim innocence is over.

The OP failed to prove his innocent and was subsequently found guilty/convicted and sentenced based upon that conviction.

Benefits of the doubt don’t fly after a conviction. What are you not understanding?

Men the denialism is strong. You were quick to point out how Nigerians are quick to make disparaging comments about a.a to white people and then you say you don't have time discuss about us? You don't watch black comedians? Then who are people in the audience in those shows? I am no tiktok and read comments sections, and I know many a.a have negative views about africans and call us sell outs. Bro,the op's sentence will not aid you in anyway. I have read of a.a who suffered miscarriage of justice and felt for them, released after decades after protesting their innocence. The American criminal justice is not fool proof ok

I'm from Cross River state and my fiance is from Oyo state. Baba it's people who grew up in the village that have bigoted mentality. If you grew up in an urban area mixing with so many other people then you will be open minded. Ethnocentrism is not peculiar to one ethnic group. Everybody believes that their own tribe or people are the best and should not mix with other people. White people don't like interracial marriage and black people still discriminate on the basis of ethnicity.

1stGenAmerican:
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And there is no prison in the US where you won’t find a Nigerian inmate. Hopefully your xenophobia didn’t blind your eyes to that.

YOU have a lot of nerve to disparage Black Americans especially since one of the MAIN reasons Nigerians were ever able to migrate to the US was because of BLACK AMERICANS AND THE CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT. And oh yeah, Nigerians do the same things that you claim Black Americans do. And so do Whites. And so do Asians.

For those of you who were not daft enough to like his comment, I want to tell you something.

See the horrible way this guy spoke about Black Americans? As soon as many Nigerian men set foot on American soil, they seek out White people so that they can say those same things about Black Americans to White people which makes White people lose even more trust in Nigerians.

OP mentioned groups not wanting to help him but it wasn’t just because of his crime. Most Black organizations are reluctant to help Nigerians who really need and deserve help because of Nigerians like the guy that I am replying to. They waste no time talking bad about Black Americans to White people but the minute White people show them that they don’t see them as special, they want to cry racism and expect help from the people they disparaged. [size=8pt][/size]

I’m sure OP felt the same way and now look, he has received a longer sentence than ANY Black American man in the history of the US.

This is also why some Nigerian immigrants are very careful about the Nigerians that they befriend in the US.

Bro take the chill pill. I know there is some kind of schism between africans and African Americans and it goes both ways. I have watched Aries Spears and a host of black comedians make disparaging jokes about africans to entertain a majority white audience. I have watched Wild n Out shows and heard the silly things those a.a guys talk about Micheal Blackson. That's doesn't mean that a man shouldn't be granted a benefit of doubt when it comes to his crimes. That I'm African doesn't mean that I don't sympathize with R Kelly's case or Bill Cosby. You are not the judge in this matter. About 60% of inmates in America are blacks even though they make less than 20% of the entire population. If a person commits a crime regardless of race he should be convicted and if innocent should be given the opportunity to claim his innocence. All this hated is out of ignorance

Your cousin has to understand the implications of her actions. There is what is called sextortion (sex and extortion) and also revenge pornography. When two people claim to be in love, they do a lot of silly things forgetting nothing lasts forever. When two people breakup, most atimes they become bitter and try to disgrace or shame the other person. If the guy doesn't marry her nko? What do you think will be his opinion of her? Guy protect your family image, the stuff about guys is that we don't mind to do what we will never agree to be done to our female family member

Have you not heard of men who don't like taking pictures? Have you not heard of men who like to keep their relationships private? You guys be talking has if it's only women who have options, men do too. That's how some people make it sound like any girl you are marrying is somebody's trash, am I the one who is a virgin? Someone too is going to marry a girl I have bleeped and don't remember her name. You will think only millionaires got girls, which is not true.

My ex got pregnant for some guy I didn't know, she hid from me, when I found out she begged and cried I shouldn't breakup with her and that she doesn't mind to be my side chick. One part of me said I should just pretend and be chopping her, but I realised I fit con put am the 2nd belle and na so I no go fit separate again. Baba I bone the chick with immediate alacrity. See if you know you don't like a woman's character don't even her sex with her cos you could get stucked with what you don't want to deal with. Why have sex with someone you don't have feelings for?

Wait ooo, you first had a relationship with your brother's sister in-law. That is to say your brother's wife's sister. That one no do, now na your brother wife you don con dey fancy. So you wan flex the both women connected to your brother? God abeg oooh, I no want this kind brother oooh. I don't know why some guys can't go and get their own babe, but after you don run your matter finish them go wan flex am for you. My current GF is still single ooo, but immediately I put the ring on it and bring her to my family house na so person eye go dey shook. I better warn that babe from now.

Patrioticman007:
These southerners are epitome of evil, may lord lugard never sleep well for joining us with these devila incarnate.

All this north vs South beef every time is sickening. If an abduction of school students occurs in the north, that's the same thing southerners will say about the northerners as well which is wrong. If I ever leave this country na only my family fit be the reason I go show back. Why will I want to live amongst people who will stereotype and hate me for no just cause

udemzyudex:
I no dey understand nonsense.

Of course even in class no bi every student dey understand.

Starzo:
So according to this your logic, spilling of human blood is only evil if it's done for ritual purposes but totally justified if it's to appease some blood thirsty gods right??...and you were claiming to be the one that believed in the sanctity of human life. So disappointing.

Baba don't misinterpret my words, I first said they did it out of ignorance and what I pointed out again is that they were not callous and senseless killers. Did you read the story were a brother took his younger brother to kill and cut off his hands to make money though rituals in Kwara state? Or they stealing of girls pants for juju? I condemnation all forms of murder either to appease the gods or for money. It's abysmal that in the 21th these things still occur despite the level of knowledge gap between we and those ancestors who lived in the bushes.

Starzo:
almost all tribes in Nigeria performed even still perform some type of human sacrifice.
Either before the burial of a late king or the coronation of a new one

Was it for money or to get rich? Did they do it to their family members or close relatives? See if you want to do human sacrifice to make money no quams, but I pray it's not police that arrest you but vigilante or community youths. Then explain to them that their fore father were doing the same.

Kobojunkie:
OP didn't say that now she is pregnant. She instead told you that she is 2 months pregnant.

What difference does it make? In fact, if she was 2-3 weeks pregnant then she could abort with less complications. But 2 months? The baby bumped have started to show already, she has made up her mind that she wants to keep the baby. If she didn't, she would have gotten rid of it already. Her calculation no pay na the matter be that. And if you think we all just being harsh on her, go and marry her and adopt the baby. Shey na you for another trend say no baby should be abandoned cos of paternity fraud, oya work don show

Starzo:
Which ancestors??,the ones that were killing twins and making human sacrifices to appease the gods??

They did it out of ignorance and more over its only among Efiks and Ibibio people that killed twins, it wasn't rampant. The Yorubas or Hausas didn't do it. If you like go and kill your mama to make the same money others are making daily. With all the rituals for money how many are richer than Elon Musk

Kobojunkie:
Try to learn to not inject your personal biases into any story you read. That way you can infact pick up on exactly why the author is telling you.

None of what you continue to infer makes sense as regards this story.

Minister of Defense, let see if I got it again, op met her old flame in a party, she didn't know he was married. She was suspicious and finally knew he was married. Now she is pregnant, wants to contact his to expose everything and needs advice. Oya na wetin again? Did I miss something?

udemzyudex:
This your talk no get head I swear.

Na you no get head to understand am.

Kobojunkie:
I don't understand your reasoning at all.

What does it matter how many other single men approached her while she was in this relationship with this man?

What does it matter to this story how some gals praise or don't praise sugar daddies?

I really don't understand how what you have related here has to do with this story as told?

It all matters and if you don't understand that you don't understand anything. She had choices to make to have prevented what has become of her. She just simplified everything in one post, did you know how long their relationship lasted. Or you think he didn't buy her gifts or gave her money when they were together. Baba her greed and poor decision making is what has brought her to this point. All this white knights call a spade a spade. You think if I know my sister is dating a married man, I would support her? Cos I know this is how it always ends

[quote author=Kobojunkie post=106348072]I didn't say you absolved the man either. I said you are choosing here to blame the woman for the fault that is the man's.

The moment this woman become pregnant for this man, she became part of that family meaning she has business with the man's family and wife. She can and she probably should text or call the wife so she learns of what her husband has been up to.
[/quote[b]]I couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him[/b]. Abeg na who talk this statement? Why do you make it sound as if she is a zombie and has no idea of what's going on. Do you know how many other single guys that have approached her during her relationship with the married man and she rejected them. Wait have you not seen were girls praise their sugar daddy for the gifts and money he showers on them? Baba babes are not the type of people you want to support blindly oooh. If you watch the Meyers show, they will shout and talk and talk and the DNA test will confirm they are lying. Support a girl at your own peril

MufasaLion:
Yes, ladies bear the brunt more but the man too shouldn't be left out.

Highest she can get is to use the court to force him to pay child support monthly until the child is an adult. And don't forget that she first saw the red flag that he never invited her to his place and finally when she found out he was married, she still continued, she didn't break it off. Oga white knight go and save her, marry her with her pikin. Girls nowadays don't like to take responsibility for their actions or hate accountability. If you enjoy big gbola and squirting orgasms, know say pregnancy dey

MufasaLion:
[s][/s]

Srop spewing trash! Why must she (women mostly) be this castigated when she didn't impregnate herself?

Because women have more to lose if a sexual relationship doesn't work out. She didn't impregnate herself but she allowed herself to be impregnated. If I keep on inviting guys of questionable character into my house, they come and go at odd hours and do anyhow. If something gets stolen in my house, and I start shouting what do you think my neighbors will say; are you not the one bringing useless boys to your house? You are responsible for the type of people you let into your life. Who now is carrying the pregnancy? Abi na the man?

ifyken:
Your parents may not interfere if your marriage has trouble,after all you are an adult you are supposed to take care of your problem yourself.
Some married people don't have stable homes, don't think that marriage gives stable home. Trust me as long as both of you love each other, marriage or no marriage you will have a stable home.
Also you don't have to follow all christain tradition after all you don't follow
1) if you have a female boss would you resign since the bible does not all women to be the leader (1 Timothy 2:12)
2) rape virgins to marry them (Deuteronomy 22:28-29)
3) kill children if they insult prophets or pastors ( 2 Kings 2:23-25)
and so many others so leave some christain tradition if it is not morally right or good for you.

Bros it's not all that old testament thing. We are africans ok, and in an African setting living with a girl who you have not paid her bride price is seen as a taboo. She is a Yoruba girl and the last born of her family. Her mom will not consent to cohabitation, and sincerely I don't want to completely cut off from my family becos of marriage cos nobody knows tomorrow. Everybody likes a successful marriage it's only the terrible ones that scare people away. I have seen ladies in their 30-40s desperate for marriage

OKOATA:
Funny thing is that we did white wedding, engagement, introduction and court marriage and yet she still cheated. I wouldn't roll out court marriage for young couples but it's helping me now to have custody of my only child. Assuming there was no court marriage it might have been worse but that's the only advantage of court marriage, if you are taking care of your child's responsibility the court will easily allow you to have access to her, aside the child thing court marriage is pure bullcrap, because right now if not for court strike the divorce would have been finalized but here I am waiting till the court starts the sitting again so I can get it over with. Once you cheat bye bye to public toilet puzzy.

Engagement, introduction, white wedding and court marriage and then she still slept with her boss con scatter the marriage. Chai, abeg what kind of embarrassment be this. What did her family have to say about the whole saga?

People don't read history that's why they don't know. Human civilization right from ancient Mesopotamia has lasted for more than 10,000 years. The Egyptians had their own religions for more that 5000 years before Christ, the Hindu Vedas and Sanskrit texts are older than the Bible. Confucius was born 500 years before Christ. Do you know how many people have predicted the end of the world (Mayans, Incas and Aztecs)and we are still here today. There was a time the Roman emperor Nero was thought to be the anti-christ. Christian Eschatology and Apocalypse is what I had about before I wan 20. We should worship God out of love and not fear. Just hustle, take care of your family and live a good life that's all.

JovialJune:
Oh so it is solely Op's fault? She is suppose to buy condom for the man to use?

And at bolded, explain me this, are you saying a man cannot say NO to a woman's advances? Are men weak beings that they can't decline to sexual activities? It may be that I do not get you clearly, so let me ask, do you mean that sexual activities start and end with females instead of two consenting adults?

Didn't you read the first line abi you purposefully skipped it so that you can provoke. To answer your question, how many guys since your puberty have approached you, either for sex or love, did you accept them all? A man will always make his move, but nothing is sure if the girl doesn't agree. She knew at some point that he is married but she didn't leave him because she claimed she was in love with him. She choose to be the side chick, it's a choice she made and was not under duress. It's only that the man ghosted her if not we won't hear of this matter. You girls carry your emotions to high and you forget it could lead you to wrong person. It's not totally her fault but she knew what she was doing, she was not raped

ifyken:
You don't need to marry. Marriage doesn't make women or men faithful, it is just a waste of time and money. Whatever married couples enjoy, unmarried couples also enjoy. For this buhari time when good are rising by the week (sometimes day), talk to her that we don't need to marry and no Kobo should be wasted.
If she disagrees tell her that who did she want to impress during wedding, people who may not give to you if your financial capital reduces. If she disagrees break up, she may be one of those women who only like the title of a married woman and may change when she is married.
JUST MY TWO CENTS

My brother you know this Christian family of a thing and tradition. My parent will never support me to be a baby daddy. And more over I always wanted a family and I am not scared of responsibilities only for the person who Worth's it. I don't want to have kids outside of a stable home

OKOATA:
I told my ex the same thing you are saying to ur current GF. Well she dared me and slept with her boss and now she's my ex. No time.

Abi ooo. I will be 30 by January, I have passed that stage of puppy love. I don't beg anybody to do the right thing anymore, and if you know you can't play by my rules na to free you make you go. It's your life and your body, I wish for the best out of life but I will not hesitate to protect myself from selfish MUMU people without better home training