The issue of consent has been playing up for a while now. I just thought I should add a little to the debate here. As a lawyer, I know what constitutes rape, and what consent is. I have heard some ladies argue fiercely on this issue. One went as far as saying that she can decide to sleep naked on a guy's bed, and not give consent for sex. Even if she kisses and carresses the guy, it is still not consent. Well that is what the law says in theory. A lady can withdraw consent at any time she feels like. Anything after that is rape. Well only in theory. I have defended two people accused of rape in court, and won in both cases. So I believe I am in a good position to dish out this advice. Take it or leave it.
Our ladies should realise that we are in a morally decadent society, most men and women have no honour anymore. Sex is a frivolity. If you do not want to have penetrative sexual intercourse with a man, DO NOT go visiting him in his house at night, or even attempt to sleep over, avoid anything remotely suggestive while you are alone, such as kissing, smooching etc. In this situation, 80% of men will assume you are down for sex. Because truthfully, 80% of women in this situation are prepared to have sex before doing the above. If a guy rapes you under these circumstances, it ll be extremely difficult, if not impossible to prove a case of rape. Take him to court, it ll just be your word against his, with his word appearing more valid than yours. You will not be able to prove beyond reasonable doubt that he raped you he ll always have a stronger case than you. In theory, it would not matter to the court that you consented to other forms of intimacy, but in reality, that thought is just hanging on everyone's mind including the judge and that is what the defense lawyer ll harmer on. As long as the guy maintains that you both agreed to have sex, and you even agreed to visit him and spend the night, you cannot prove that you withdrew consebt at some point. The kind of rape that is easy to prove is the type that occurs with force, usually with no prior relationship or intimacy.

There are perverts everywhere. Social media campaigns and ranting won't change their behavior. Some cases of rape are difficult to prove, so the law nay not be effective in helping you. Please protect yourself from these predators. If you don't want to get raped, don't visit him in his house alone, or spend the night. Do not consent to any form of intimacy. A word is enough for the wise

thorpido:
It could be men or women.There are some troublesome women who are also violent as the lady in this case.They cut with their tongues and do damage with their hands.
It's more common with men however being the physically stronger one.

Do men derive pleasure in beating women? I think women provoke their husbands to violence, and then the men lack self control, or a naturally bad tempered. The result is this

lalasticlala make we add pishure of snake?

jadekitana
stupedinluv
julietcutie
pucelle
rocktation

I'd like your opinion

otswag:
Here we go again. Another "JOHESU vs Medical Doctors" series of threads brewing. If its your right, use the law to defend your argument. Don't bring a lame excuse that because drs are paid this, u must be paid that. Plus, learn to stop painting drs in a bad image and misleading the public just to gain public sympathy for your cause.

But doctors started it!

Lalasticlala Dominique oya do the needful abeg

Lalasticala ishilove dominique.... Time to put foward anoda perspective, lets b balanced

Famous pen wrote
14th of May 2015, Nasiru Ahmed a 45yr old diabetic was admitted into a private hospital after symptoms of hyperglycemia. He was subsequently placed on insulin. However, something happened after a few days. Nasiru started shaking and sweating profusely. He appeared disoriented and confused. The 'nurse' on duty assured him that he would be ok. But his condition worsened. There was no doctor immediately available. The 'nurse', apparently confused decided to administer more insulin. Mr Nasiru entered into a coma, from which he did not recover.
Another news sufficed sometime ago on the internet, about a 'nurse' who chopped off a baby's joystick in the name of circumcision.
Sad stories like these have continued to emerge from our private hospitals, both in the rural and urban areas. Nobody seems to take note, until they are personally affected. There is an adage that if you see a fowl scattering faeces with it's legs, chase it away because you do not know who would end up eating those legs, it might be you!. Any of us or someone close to us may need medical care someday, and may fall into the hands of these killers in uniform.
Nursing as a profession in Nigeria today requires three years of education in a school of Nursing for Nurse assistants or five years in the university, after which one must pass series of professional examinations. During training, like physicians nurses are exposed to courses like anatomy, physiology, medical biochemistry, pharmacology and pathology. As well as skills necessary to carry out certain routine Nursing procedures. These courses are designed to help a nurse make sound clinical judgements after careful observations, using certain guidelines known as the "Nursing process" . Hence, a nurse is bound by certain moral and ethical principles that have been developed over time, and frequently reviewed. This therefore entails that nurses are continuously trained, and sit for exams to bring them up to speed with current trends modern realities.
Sadly however, in an attempt to bridge cost and make quick money, doctors in the private sector aided by certain Nurses with low moral integrity have resorted to training and employing quacks who pretend to be Nurses, at the detriment of patient's safety. These quacks who are termed "Auxiliary Nurses" are responsible for countless harm done to patients on a daily bases, as well as the negative image currently being suffered by the Nursing profession today.
One may ask, is the job of a nurse so easy that a secondary school drop out could be trained to work like Nurse? The honest answer is a big No. In a country like Nigeria where a lot of things go unregulated, impersonating any professional is quite easy. We would not forget so easily the story of a man who impersonated a doctor in the ministry of health for up to a decade before he was caught. Visit the rural areas today, there are male nurses and 'chemist men' who pass themselves as doctors. Even bricklayers and foremen pass themselves as engineers and architects. These often go unnoticed until disaster occurs. In every profession, one could learn a handful of the basic rudiments and impersonate, until he or she is faced with a challenge that requires professional judgement.
These "auxiliaries" are often young secondary school leavers or older ones who have nothing else to do. They are recruited by private hospitals, and trained for six months, were they are mostly thought how to give injections, check vital signs, dress wounds, and in some cases they are allowed to take deliveries of pregnant women. They are given nurses uniforms and used as nurses. This is done under the assumption that there would always be a doctor around to give orders and control what they do. But herein lies the real danger to the patient. As in the case of Nasiru, there was no doctor around when the emergency occurred. He was left at the mercy of an uneducated slowpoke, who had no medical knowledge to make sound clinical decisions at that time, even if she knows how to give injections. Mr Nasiru simply had hypoglycemia Probably due to insulin overdose, or failure to eat after taking insulin. Even a first year nursing student would have anticipated and identified the symptoms and acted accordingly. Two cubes of sugar or a bottle of coke would have kept him alive pending further intervention.
Even in cases where there is a doctor or a Registered nurse supervising, the danger is not reduced in anyway. It does not change the fact that the Auxiliary holding a syringe is uneducated and unqualified to do the job, and hence is unaccountable for any error made, making her more likely to make grave errors. 8 days prior to the writing of this article, i spoke with a man who had a bad leg. He had been like that since he was 9 years old. How did he lose his leg? A nurse in a private hospital injected him right in the middle of his buttocks, Probably injuring his sciatic nerve leaving him paralysed for life. A simple knowledge of anatomy would have prevented this grave error.
Even when no lasting damage is done, these quacks misinform patients and expose them to further complications. One once told a pregnant woman that she could deliver her baby without ceaserian section, even after a doctor had told her it was her only option. She was eventually admitted into a private hospital to be delivered. She was fully dilated when she was moved to the delivery room. After unsuccessful attempts to push, there was no fetal descent. It was a doctor who later arrived that palpated her abdomen and discovered that the baby was lying transversely. She eventually went through casearian section
This pieces is intended to sensitize the public to be on the look out for these quacks. Countless errors have been made, lives have been lost to the activities of these quacks. The hospital owners are very good at covering up these incidences, or offering evasive and untrue explanations. According to the act establishing it, It is illegal and criminal to practice as a nurse without a license from the nursing and midwifery council of Nigeria or engage the services of such an individual. It is also a criminal act to train, or claim to train individuals as nurses, except in accredited institutions. A word of caution also goes out to the doctors in the private sector who undermine the lives and safety of their patients by training or engaging unqualified personnel to impersonate. One day, the Nursing council will wake up to its responsibility and tackle this menace head on.
Whenever you or a loved one checks into a private hospital, be weary of the 'nurses' that attend to you. It is your right to know the qualification of any nurse that attends to you. You could ask a simple question "Are you a registered Nurse?". Your life would be in serious danger if you leave life and death decisions about your health in the hands of an 'Auxiliary nurse ". They are uneducated and unlicensed quacks who have absolutely no idea what they are doing. You may be better off being looked after by your mother at home. Nigerians Beware!
Dicefrost

dicefrost:
Lalasticlala, ishilove, is dis not front page worthy? At least something for Nigerian children today

Seconded, lalasticlala, abeg move it to front page lets dedicate this to Nigerian children nd d incomin administration. Ishilove olawalebabs , Fynestboi , Richiez
Oya do d needful pls

Twaci:
There was this story I heard one time, a guy saw a girl in a shopping mall and approached her. They talked...gisted was more like it and even exchanged numbers.

The guy didn't call back and refused to pick her calls later on. Why?

"She paid my bills -" he had replied.

And I asked myself, so what? But then he finished his sentence. "- it was worth N52, 500"

More to that, another thing that had got to him was the fact that the girl drove off in a sweet ride while he had hailed a taxi.

Thanks for the info Rapmoney, hope guys read and understand this.

You are free to draw your own conclusion. But the truth is you fo not know the guys intention. I have dated a girl who is very rich. Her father was a politician, she was a successful doctor. I never felt inferior, even if i was a fresh graduate with no job. I even drive her car sometimes. She was more than ready to sponsor our wedding too. But i had to end the relationship at a point. Why? She forgot that she is a woman, and that her man is supose to be in control of the family. She is never open to suggestion, and she tries to give me instructions! Even my parents warned me. Did i break up with her because i felt inferior? Far from it. She was just not wife material, and her money made her so. So my dear, the truth is that for most wome, as ttheir social status grows, so does their ego. If a man percieves that your ego has grown to the point were you cannot becontained, he will walk away. A man would not marry a woman who he cannot control period!

cokacoola:
My brother-in-law is tormenting my life

hey romancelander' my name is cokacoola, i have been married for eight years now and the marriage is blessed with kids, there is this problem of my wife jnr broada staying with us. My wifed travel last month to abuja on a bisusness trip for 2 weeks. On evening I was very Hot and decicded to visit an ashawo joint down the streat. I got there, picked a girl and bargained with her and we headed to her room, i got to her door and saw my brother-in-law coming frm another room with an ashawo and he saw me face to face. I was very shocked and ashamed he even greetd me. That niqht i didnt even come home. When i came bark the next morning, the first he said to was "guyman, abeg i need 50k no be force if u go give you give me if u no go give me, anything ur wife hear na ur pocket". i became afraid and gave him the money and ever since the he has bin blackmailing me and am tired buying and give money to him forcefuly.

Please, dear romance landers, how can I end this?

You deserve wat u r getting. .... Nexxxxxt

Bro, u r hurting ursef. She clearly doesn't want u anymore. She is stayin out of pity. I bliv dere is someone else in her life already. So spare urdef d heartache, walk away

khiaa:
Whenever a man is cheating on his wife and the wife finds out, you men always tell her not to end the marriage and to take it to God in prayer. Well I would like to ask you male hypocrites a question. If you found out your wife was cheating on you would you

1. Throw her out of the house or

2. Take it to God in prayer, be honest

I don't justify cheating, but you should know that a man's cheatin is difrnt frm a woman. A man can have random sex nd not even remember d woman's face. Its just wat it is, 'sex: notin more. But b4 a woman opens her legs, her emotions has to b iinvolved. Except prostitutes, women dnt fvck random strangers. So if ur wife cheats, it isnt just sex, u v lost her too. Hence its easier to 4giv a cheatin man dan a cheatin woman

funmilayoB:

definately yes some can even loose it to pigs, chicken ,goat holes and gays. once u achieve d orgas 4 d first tym u r no more a virgin

Ejaculation can occur as wet dreams, with out sexaul activity. So u position is definitely flawed. A guy is disvigined wen he inserts his jt in a hole

Dating in the university is a waste of time and money. Babe go just dey chop u 4 free., dey divide ur pocket money

You can't have it all in a relationship, you jist have to talk and compromise

Nigeria lost its only professor of neuro surgery because health workers are on strike. They are on strike because this same government refuse to meet agreements it entered. Should i feel sorry for him? He should bow his head in shame that his sister jad to be flown to ghana, when we have more than 30 tertiary hospitals

jackpot:
@Peaceemerald

Involve his boss in the office and get him sacked. His boss won't even trust him again because he can even blackmail him. Trust me, it works! He will live an eternal life of regret. The boy is childish and a nonsense low-lifer!

You sound really angry..... .. But i agree, d boy is childish and a low-lifer. is the girl a saint?

I heard a story like that, don't know if it's true o. It may be fiction.
A guy dated a girl for 2years, both of them were students then. He loved her so much, and even offended his mother and sister just to please her. Her dad died along the way leaving her stranded. The guy in question practically extorted his well to do parents to pay her fees and keep her in school. One thing led to another, and he discovered that the girl was cheating. He broke up with her, and she kept begging and sending people to beg him. Eventually she was forgiven. The same thing happened again, this time it was with a friend of the guy. She pleaded again, and the guy was stupid enough to forgive. Infact, he introduced her to his family. He eventually graduated and left town, but kept hearing rumours that she was dating one doctor infact they were engaged. all the while she was still collecting money from him for project seminar etc. She collected close to 70k. When he came back to town he confronted her about the cheating, and this time she did not beg anymore, she just said she wanted to break up, that she has found someone that wants to marry her next year, and since the guy still has law school and service in front of him, he should look for someone else. He knelt down to plead with her, even sent the same people she sent previously to beg her. He offered to marry her after law school, but she just refused. So the guy accepted his fate. One day he went to her house, after talking they ended up having sex. She didn't know that the guy had set his phone to capture everything, and even took some pictures when he was pretending to answer a call. He sent her the video and pictures on bbm the next day. And he didn't contact her again until he left for law school. The guy isn't interested in blackmailing, or making the video public, but then as she is getting married, let her leave with the guilt that someone somewhere has secrets that could destroy her. While he is managing a broken heart, she should manage a troubled heart. Scores are level, no hard feelings.

jackpot:
You lack self esteem. You are a kid, and a low-lifer. Cheap blackmail for more sex? You're scared you can't get more holes to dig after hers? Mtcheeeew. I'm out.

Once again, I'm not the one!

dicefrost:




Haaaaaa op you cheated on a guy after all that? You took his money while you were screwing another guy? He forgave you, you still didn't repent he begged you to stay you left. Sorry o i hate to be the devil's advocate, but that guy has every right to be angry contrary to what your female folks may tell you he could screw you right now. No amount of money you refund will compensate for what you ve done. Just accept that you are wrong and keep pleading. He loved you once, those feelings are still there somewhere.



And to you guy, she is a LovePeddler. And a bitchh, and a gold digger, shw has done something very terrible. But let me ask, for a woman you once loved, is it worth running her life? You ll get over the hurt, but once those pics are out, she ll be damaged forever. What shw has done to you ll b insignificant compared to ruining her life..... Think about it and do the right thing.

Wise advice, dost sensible so far. Folo it or gudluk wit d police. .... Abeg nairalanders I'm not d guy

taryour:
@ op. Honestly I don't want to believe this your story is for real, but if its real then you are not smart at all. Hold on a minute,how old are you? Where are your parents? Do you have elder sisters,brothers,uncles and aunties? Cause really if you were to be a relative of mine I would give a very dirty hot slap first for not being wise.

How long are you going to beg for Is he your god Is he married to you or obligated to you in any way

YES you dint wrong by cheating on in while you where dating which is VERY VERY WRONG,you apologised to him and he forgave you. You said yourself that he deserved a better person than you are which means you totally know your flaws,so you left it cause your conscience wouldn't let you rest.

Now isn't it better you left than stay and he being a second fiddle You going back to him to have s3x with him makes you even less smarter than I thought.

Now the deed is done and he has your nUde pictures and a video of you having s3x. Wake up girl and take the bull by the horn. What the hell is all that? That guy must be so stup1d and a weakling, he is a big F00L.

Get up girl and regain your dignity!!! That is to personal,he has no right whatsoever on this earth to have such in his hands no matter what you have done wrong either you are married to him or not.

Stop begging him abeg, you making him feel what he did is right. Here is what to do.

Bear the shame and report the incidence to your parents, go with soldiers to his parents house and give then strict warning,if possible HE or his PARENTS to should write an understatement, For no reason whatsoever should your nude pictures and videos bee seen anywhere, not only on social media but also any other phone except his. If he wants to keep it,let him fantasize on it even to his grave.

Not just that alone o, if anything as liitle as an insect bite comes your way as vengance from his side,either he double crosses you or send friends or touts to hit you then he is in a deep sh11t.

You need to be very serious about this o, this souldnt be a treat but a strict warning cause this can tarnish your future and your image. GO with soldiers. Nothing should happen to you, not even a mosquito bite.

Quit the begging abeg, you cheated on him so!! He isn't your hubby yet oo,and do you know what he has also done

WTH that guy must be so silly in his brain and you are so DuMb to have go meet him to have sEx again after breaking up.

Arrant nonsense.

Honey you are just assuming that he is someone who can be pushed around.... Lol, there iz something called 'law' it is a tricky thing, but some people are trained in the act of wielding it. Soldier ko soldier ni

modelmike7:
......... hmmmm, tho I dnt knw her or tryin to ever know her, I just feel so sorry for her future in this technology age, before you know the vid and pix might just start trending all over the country, albeit, the world! Just sorry for he future family, that's my only concern here!

It's her fault, she was a serial cheat, took d guy 4 granted cos she tot he was a fool. I gues d guy is in control nw

modelmike7:
........ You are right bro, in this case, the Police iS your BEST friend, especially the male ones, they will put or their training in police college to practise to make sure he surrenders the video, albeit, even for their lustful desires!...... So girl, police is one of the solution, but there are still some other options!

Lol u tink its everyone d police can just arrest and toture? Wat if dey find nothing on him? Or u tink he is so dumb? Judt let naughty lady pay 4 her sins jhor

When you hurt some so much, it's only fair they take a bite from you too. He ll just blackmail u 4 more sex, being d biitch u r, I'm sure u won't av a problem wit dat

You can actually become popular in romance section by opening and commenting 9n senseless threads. Someone has a thread with 90k views and 1k comments in this section

Equado:
really...dice frost aint d sole intellect bhynd dt story...ah v proof...s

Lol, i stay in the hostel with dicefrost, i c him typing the story so boss go nd die

Equado:
Been silently following this story...I think its tym I said my piece....@dicefrost...y wud yhu post a story here....r yhu so clueless to think it wud nt b exploited...infact you have no case here...Nairaland is an open forum for all...so wt yhu post here is open...so stop barking toothlessly...and complete your 'story' which I doubt is truly yours.....

I wouldn't normally insult anyone online, but mheeen you are slow! You were much better when you were following silently. After all the best way to cover stupidity is to keep quiet. But now that you have spoken, you have exposed the dept of your stupidity and buffoonery to the whole world. Please dig a hole and hide.

this is a wicked lie

this space is occupied

it is these ones that deserve death