₦airaland Forum

This is indeed a dilemma.

I missed growing up without a mom and low presence of a dad.

IgiveLadiesBj:
Guys please I need help urgently. I had sex with a girl and her menses started. She feigned ignorance that it just started. When I came I saw blood around the condom and at the base of my pennis...

Please what should I do or take please?


I'm in danger and I'm broke as Bleep now...
.. and I'm kinda homeless now

Brother, you're on your own o.

Many years ago, I had the privilege and honor of speaking at the Rethinking Virginity Conference at Harvard University. The conference was organized by Lena Chen and the Harvard Queer Students’ Association, and brought together an incredibly diverse and impressive group of feminists, who dropped some serious knowledge on all things virgin-themed. One of the most interesting parts of the panel was learning how much misinformation exists around issues of virginity, sex, and our bodies. I’ve compiled ten myths uncovered- and debunked- at yesterday’s conference:

Myth #1:
The hymen is THE definitive marker of virginity . There is no one physical trait that indicates virginity or sexual activity- not even the presence of a “hymen.” I put hymen in quotes because I’ve come to learn that it is really a nebulous entity. At yesterday’s conference, Professor Kathleen Kelly of Northeastern University discussed the history of the hymen and highlighted the way our understanding of the hymen has become misinformed. As she puts it:
“What we recognize as the hymen today was not always considered as such….If we trace the etymology of the word hymen from Greek through Latin to English, we can observe how the word progressively narrows in meaning, first denoting any sort of bodily membrane, then referring to the womb, and finally coming to mean almost exclusively “virginal membrane” in the early modern period. ..The hymen is an overdetermined, widely misunderstood sign precisely because it has never been a fixed part of anatomy…the hymen is both an anatomical part and a metonym.”
So the idea that there is some magical vaginal barrier that only virgins have is oversimplified at best. In part for this reason, back in December, a Swedish sexual rights grouprenamed the hymen the “vaginal corona.”

Myth #2:
Valuing virginity protects girls and women. In fact, valuing virginity puts girls and women at risk of violence, abuse, and assault by members of a society that believes a woman’s worth lies in her sexual behavior. As I discussed on my panel, “Virginity: A Historical and Cultural Primter,” violations of girls’ and women’s sexual and reproductive rights and health occur every day in the name of preserving and protecting girls’ virginity, delaying sexual activity, or controlling the circumstances under which girls and women lose their virginity. From forced child marriage , female genital cutting, and breast ironing to slut-shaming to the deliberate withholding of information on reproductive and sexual health, the emphasis on preserving virginity has pernicious consequences for girls in the West and beyond. I can do without that kind of “protection” thanks very much.

Myth #3:
Queer sex doesn’t “count”. As the panelists yesterday pointed out, heterosexual vaginal intercourse is often privileged above other sexual acts because of its association with reproduction (and because of good old-fashioned heteronormativity and homophobia), and so people often rely on a problematic concept of “virginity” that can exclude, marginalize, and ignore the experiences of queer folk. But yesterday’s panelists noted that it’s important for us to create and reinforce alternatives to this heteronormative penetration-focused view of virginity and how it’s “lost”. What about a female-bodied person whose sexuality does not involve being penetrated? Are her sexual experiences somehow less valid? Part of rethinking virginity has to include incorporating a more nuanced and more queer-friendly concept of sex and virginity that doesn’t serve to devalue the experience of any person or group of people.

Myth #4:
You can only “lose it” once. This myth is false on a number of levels. First of all, the term “losing your virginity” is problematic, as it suggests that something is inherently lost as a result of sex and therefore engages in slut shaming. Secondly, many people find the idea that you can only experience something new once to be limiting and/or oppressive. The concept of having multiple virginities was thrown around a lot yesterday- some found this concept useful and meaningful, some less so. The idea is that there’s a first time for lots of things, not just penetrative vaginal intercourse, thus, we all have multiple virginities to lose over the course of our sexual lifetimes as we take part in new sexual experiences that are meaningful to us. I find this concept useful because it’s not specific to one particular kind of behavior, and emphasizes sexuality as an ongoing journey rather than an all-or-nothing situation in which you’re either completely abstinent or fully sexually active. It also seems to make more room for queer folks whose sexuality includes being attracted to more than one sex or gender, as well as trans people who may have had sex before transitioning as one gender, but have yet to experience sex as another gender, and anyone else who has had what they define as sex in the past but feels for some reason they now approach the same activity from a new mindset or attitude.

Myth #5:
Sex within marriage is the “healthiest” kind. Unfortunately, a marriage license isn’t a magical key to a “healthy” and pleasurable sex life. In fact, sex within marriage is not even always consensual, and sadly, rape occurs within the institution of marriage every day. Remaining a virgin until marriage doesn’t guarantee a “healthy” sex life any more than having sex before marriage does.

Myth #6:
There’s one universal definition of sex. This one’s also false. In fact, when about 50 conference participants sat down to define sex for themselves, about 50 different definitions were created. Some people thought MouthAction should be considered sex, and some people didn’t. Some people thought the context of the situation determined whether or not it was sex- for example, if proper consent was obtained for a certain act (Some survivors of forced first intercourse consider themselves to still be virgins because rape is violence, not a sex act). Others took into consideration whether or not the partners had intended to “go further” but were interrupted for some reason. Some common factors that folks seemed to take into account when deciding whether something “counts” as sex or not:
-when and how consent was obtained
-number of partners
-existence of orgasm and/or ejaculation
-length of time engaged in activity
-intentions of the people involved
Perhaps most importantly, we established that even though there are many different ideas of what “sex” is, my definition of sex and your definition of sex can coexist simultaneously. One doesn’t invalidate the other.

Myth #7:
Slut-shaming plays an important social role by discouraging “risky” behavior.
Slut-shaming (as opposed to educating and empowering by providing comprehensive sexuality education) doesn’t discourage risky behavior or encourage healthy sex, it simply perpetuates a culture of shame, fear, and silence around sex and sexuality that has very real and dangerous ramifications for everyone, not just girls and women. Also, it’s important to note that while feminists have talked a lot about the harmful nature of slut-shaming, virgin shaming can be just as harmful, and is something we need to actively discourage as well.

Myth #8:
Teens should learn that sex is dangerous so they won’t put themselves at risk for unwanted pregnancy and/or STIs. This myth is so pervasive that the United States government has bought into it: all federally funded sex ed is currently obligated by law to teach that sex before marriage will do psychological, physical, and emotional harm. This argument is often grounded in pseudo scientific studies about oxytocin that claim the release of oxytocin makes casual sex emotionally difficult for women. Sex educator Meagara Bell put it quite well yesterday when she said, “The oxytocin [myth] is an absurd pseudoscientific rationale for a moral stance.” Why are we traumatizing the next generation with misinformation and scare tactics? Let’s stop policing people’s sexualities and start educating them to make informed decisions about their bodies and their lives.

Myth #9:
Teens don’t want to talk about sex with their parents. As the ever-sharp Shelby Knox pointed out, surveys consistently show that teens would prefer to receive sexuality education from their parents. And when you don’t have a community that supports you, no amount of sex ed in the world will suffice.

Myth #10:
There is no such thing as sex-positive abstinence. This myth is sometimes even found in feminist circles when people assume that abstinence can’t be taught as part of a comprehensive sexuality curriculum. This is false. When included as part of a comprehensive and factually accurate program, abstinence can and should be taught as an excellent method of birth control and STI prevention, as well as a valid and legitimate choice for sexual beings of any age. In fact, this is a crucial part of any sex positive curriculum.The unfortunate prevalence of this myth is indicative of a much greater need for inclusivity and sex positivity in sexuality education: now that we know that our ideas and experiences about sex and virginity aren’t as simple as they seem, sexuality education programs really need to catch up and become more inclusive of a fluid range of experiences, sexualities, and attitudes about sex.

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Jult:
I'm a single 30 years old lady looking for a man for a relationship that will lead to marriage.
I'm a working class in IT field, live in Lagos island. State of origin Edo, Christian
Kindly pm me if interested.

I just sent you a pm.

Olunmercy56:
And you don't want hookup But you can send dm to a married woman

If you read the post very well ma'am. In relationships, people suffer emotional abuse. However, She didn't mention leaving her marriage or needing hookup but instead warned off any man with bad intentions. Everyone needs someone to talk to when the need arises. And in furtherance to this, I'm not here to flirt with anyone but rather seek for my better half and very soon I believe with God she will overcome her fears and get better. Thanks Miss @Olunmecy56

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Lonelysoul:
Am married, but my husband doesn't satisfy my emotional needs. I provably won't cheat, so stay away if that's what you seek, however, if you don't mind being my virtual lover, going on virtual dates then please send me a Dm, or a mail @ blessingjohnson2131@gmail.com

tyronepriest@outlook.com
08130700260 WhatsApp.

Post Deleted

Diamondniyi:
This morning, she received a sum #20,000 which is for her food stuffs on campus. Fortunately for her, the bank account is her first bank account to be opened and never knew how Security nums and ATM CARD NUMs work.
She received a call from this scammer(07045504107) demanding for her Security nums and others, she gave all to them. It’s all her mistakes because she never knew how banks work. Please any help to trace the criminal. And any help from nairalanders please. She has been crying since morning

............................................................................
Obtain a standing order from a court. It should be N1,500. The bank will investigate the fraud and refund the money whenever the fraudster's account is credited. Most people don't know this. Even if the fraudster's account is domiciled in another bank different from yours.

Love is overrated... love gets you killed. Pain is love. At a point it'll get you emotionally drained. Only few are lucky to enjoy the luxury love brings- maybe 1 in a million.

Chii59:
I don't think love is worth it. Too painful, too expensive, too stressful. I give up.

People change a lot. Sincerity of purpose is one of the things lovers forget to have as their watchword. Most times, they get distracted by few situations and they stop loving one another. Most of these situations may be a strong indications that one of them is falling out of love. Excellent communication helps lovers to explore deeper thoughts of how they feel about one another thereby giving room to correct any mistake or bad behaviour in love instead of falling out of love. And from experience, when someone stops loving you, it can result in depression if you find it hard to get over it on time.

LoveTalk:
Hi Cuties and Fellas!

We've seen a lot of people fall in love in different ways.

Some people promise to change if you could give them chance to come into your life.

Many people have been victims of this in the past.

A guy or lady will promise to change and become a better person but the reverse is the case once you allow them in your life.

I don't know if people do really change when they love someone.

Please let's discuss this question:

Do you believe people can change if they love someone?

HakimZiyech:
If my life is a movie; you guys will shed tears.....ups and downs, but I try my best to create funny and meaningless topics/posts just to smile in this forum...but offline, local man is weak and a shadow of his online personalities.

Shoutout to all orphan first son that are married....God will not forsake us, Amen.

Amen

What do you expect from him...
His first degree is LLB. LAW and
his Master's degree, M.A. BUSINESS ADMINISTRATION. However no evidence of PhD. registration.

That's not Lincoln Navigator, it's one of the ESCALADES series. I drive one.

Omihanifa:
That's Lincoln navigator

Nah only for occultic movies he dey spend heavily nah

Real life he's just an average Man maybe the hoodlums taught the man go get plenty of pounds and dollars inside his car

highra:
why is the verification taking so long, I have uploaded my credentials for the past 1and half month and yet to be verified, I Hope I am not d only one on this chapter?

Consult Breathtaker above. He would fix that for you in less than 20 minutes. He's reliable.

Breathtaker:
Hello, if you have uploaded your credentials and you are yet to be verified, chat me up... I have contact with an Admin officer, he will verify it ASAP.
0903653698four (Whatsapp)

Thanks a lot man. You're one of the finest men on this platform. He actually did it in less than 10 minutes. You're the best. I appreciate.

Bang & Olufsen... World best TV manufacturer. It's expensive though; I use one.

Andyblaze:
I've gotten one particular brands which is touted to be the most durable products over and over again but I don't know why they keep getting "burnt" after a year or two... So I wanna know, between LG, Samsung, etc which is the the most advisable to go for

It's Atiku's Twitter handle. The statement wasn't personally signed by the former president. Atiku's tweets are signed AA. Maybe the reason for replying that manner. However, the word "Thanks" is a good gesture.

NOUN has the highest admission yearly as the school admits students every semester. I.e. twice a year. Admission is as high as over 50,000 in a year combining both semesters.

bigseank:
when lasu still had a lot of satellite campuses. just forget it. but i think it should come in 3rd now after Noun and Unilorin

Going by logic
No1. Noun has the most campuses all over nigeria
No2. Unilorin has the highest number of admission yearly
No3. Lasu is still the cheapest state school, located in a populated state like Lagos.

NOUN: 500,000 students...last Graduands were over 22,000

seanwilliam:
Noun 150k Lasu close to 100k students Follow by unilag I think. .60k

I had to eat sand for dinner having spent days on the street without food when my stepmom sent us out of our dad's house as kids.

umtitibaba:
In life, there are moments we are faced with difficult situations with the sole aim of surviving hoping there will be light at the end of such circumstance..

Mine: it happened when I was I part 2 second semester, it was close to end of semester and there was no cash on me, no gas in my cylinder and I had to eat that night .... i had to Cook 'Eba' with normal water, ate with Palm oil sprinkled with salt.. imo that night bad gaaan....

So over to you guys, what Is the weirdest thing u have done to survive?

daveFBL:
Finally, I was able to capture a snake alive without hurting it. Its still small, not more than 2 weeks old from the look of things.

The specie happens to be House brown snake, they are non-venomous snakes. You can confirm... Its day 2 with it. But just wondering where I can get pink mice or anything to feed her with. She's a female. I checked for that also.

Hope its not a bad idea?

Looks like OP has been watching NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC CHANNEL too much and to be precise; #SnakesInTheCity

arinze198:
Source: https://pmexpressng.com/daughter-kills-mother-over-sex-with-her-husband/

Mathematically, the mother gave birth to her at 16. Reward for being a b

MadeBoy:
I'm a guy that likes my privacy reasons of my quality time to think and pray for hours. Because I face a lot of spiritual challenges. And my midnight prayers have been helping me. Most especially when I had a nightmare or anytime I woke up.

I will seal up my windows and doors while my AC is blasting high. And even when I raise up my voice it doesn't come out.

The government just extended the lockdown which is tiring. She came to my house and doesn't want to leave. I have so many debts on my head now and my yearly house rent is expiring soon. This is the period I need to be alone in prayers. The little I have now I am using it to take care of her which I would have uses for myself to prolong the suffering during this lockdown. Branch and carbon are sending me SMS to pay my loans.

My apartment is so cussing, chilling and so comfortable more than her house by far. Maybe reason she doesn't want to go. She will be disturbing me and dragging remot control with me. When I am watching TV she will just change it to nollywood drama.

I do want her to be coming and going. Not just to come and stay like she is doing now. I'm not use to this type of life unlike some of my friends.

Outside of all this, I do not see future with her just normal control things..

I have not been able to leave the house or do other personal private stuff.

I need her to go maybe coming on some weekends or when invited.

She just extended her lockdown since government had extended the lockdown. The mistake you made is letting her extend her stay beyond the usual weekend you mentioned. Maybe it's high time to sit her down and explain the financial stuff with her. Even businesses are affected throughout the world. Meanwhile, exercise patience even if she's rude but tell her the truth about what's going on.

it's 11.16pm now and the moon is at its peak forming the shape of the cross in my location at Akure. I started observing it few minutes to 11pm. God is indeed great. Few days to Easter. You can check at your location too if you'll see what I'm seeing. Long beams of light from the centre of the moon to the four cardinal points- NORTH, EAST, SOUTH and WEST. My camera couldn't capture the long beams even when we used another phone. Beautiful sight to behold.

massinola:
See the animals the boys caught today.

The lockdown has not been easy on guys. So after their morning training, on their way back, they branched to a nearby bush and started hunting for any available bush meat.

These two were what they caught. I don't know their names but in our dialect, it's called Avu.

Peper soup 19 loading

African Civet

2Ballz:
How long has this been?
Have you gone for any diagnostic test to know the cause of this?
Also, is this your first experience having a foul smelly discharge?

Thanks for your Swift response.

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