Ayee Idris: Last week, a friend confided in me that her husband was hitting her. I directed her to this page hoping she can get some info/relief or guidance. She just got back to me saying that "abuse" on the page isn't what she had in mind. I didn't get her until I read all the pages. If every victim of abuse is going to be this scrutinized,doubted and judged, there is no way anyone is going to participate. A new thread has to be created. One clean of all tthe side talks, insults and judgmental people and one that won't be on the front page. IMO

Merkki: Shame on all the fighters on this thread. Big shame!

pickabeau1: Soffri sofri

Una don turn this thread to gist hangout

Ok ooo

francafrank: Maybe the originator of this thread should do another one on abuse. it looks like we have missed the point here.

this thread is so so so important especially for women in Nigeria...it is a big shame how it has become trivialized....a big shame really

tteam: hi house
good to know everyone is doing great.
i traveled to Houston on the 5t of October ad wast let in.
Even after showing my payments to west Houston and declaring how much i had.
Their reason was that i lied i was not pregnant during my visa interview.
had the most horrifying experience ever.
i am back in Nigeria now, thank God i and baby are safe.
apart fro me, two other 9ja ladies were set back too.

learning point: state preg stats when applying for visa, if u already have a visa then by all means avoid Houston. there are devils there searching out for black preg women.
wishing everyone goodluck wit their plans

o mine, that's crazy... sorry to hear!

was this your first trip to the US? how far gone where you...?did you try to disguise it? where you traveling alone?

hope they dint cancel your visa


personally, I always advice firstimers to try and use their visas first before they go to give birth (if they can afford it), travel with your husband (if you can), that way he answers the questions and sort of blocks you from their view, do your makeup before you disembark then disguise, disguise disguise as much as you can

pele dear, safe delivery

forevermine: Hello house. Pls I have an enquiry to make and it's kinda urgent, so I'd appreciateany useful response, especially from anyone who's had a similar experience. Pls is it necessary to change my maiden name(surname) to my husbands , on my international passport? Does this mean I will be issued a new passport entirely or js a modification of the datapage of my current passprt( as I have evidence of travels on my current passport, though there's no valid visa). If I do,Will this affect my visa application(eg it may nt correspond wt d name on my bank statement, if I'm using mine) .also wen applying for the baby's passport in usa, will bearing my maiden name(in d event that I dnt change d passport) affect this? Pls I need clarification on what to do pertaining this situation. Thanks a bunch.

Well you can change it to your husband's name but you will need to go to abuja to do that. Its an entirely new document...last i heard it is about 55k. If you do that your visa will still be valid. You will just need to go with your change if name document to present at that airport or poe to show you are the same person.

If you dont change it....u can still do all your baby document without wahala. Do you think its every married woman even abroad that take their husband's name. What of pple that have kids and are not married? Wont their baby get passport?

If your passport is still valid....dont bother till it expires. My two cents

ringofGod: Hey everyone, just to let u know I got into America today, no hassles at POE though they seized my indomie and kilishi ....
They just asked how much money we had, what our budget was, I showed him my hospital receipts for what we had paid etc and that was it.

One question though, I don't understand the stamp on my passport, it says OCT 0X 2013. what does that mean, how long can I stay in the US for based on that.. Help pls people.

Hey congrats and safe delivery. look well again, there should be another date on the stamp...

WudBMother:

I used Dr La. You can contact his office via the office manager Sheri Harshman

Sheri Harshman
Office Manager
281-589-0156
sharshman@doctorla.com

She will send you a comprehensive document detailing what you will pay.

My tests from Nigeria were accepted, but I had to do some others that were required by Law like HIV.

Dr. Fees - 2795
WHMC - 2500 -Vag delivery with 2 day hospital stay. 4000 - C/S with 4 day hospital stay
Anesthesiology - 1200 optional for Vag delivery
Surgical assistant if CS - 250
Pediatrician - depends on how many times your baby is seen. Mine was seen everyday during my stay at the hospital , plus one visit afterwards osting 236 + 163-discounted because I paid cash.
Pathology in the hospital - 55 - discounted because I was self paying patient.
Pediatrix hearing test -optional@326 . I refused this.
Circumcision - optional @325.
Mandatory tests at Drs. office 125

In all I spent approximately 8900 because my delivery was an elective CS and I travelled at about 31 weeks (would have avoided some tests taken at the Drs.office). A Vag deliv without epidural would cost about 6200

Before traveling I made part payments to the Dr and the hospital. I obtained receipts and letter which I VOLUNTARILY showed at POE.

After delivery. SSN came in about 4 days, birth cert was picked in a week. US passport in 2 days- expedited. Nigerian visa in 5days via an agent.

Feel free to ask any questions you have.

thanks dearie...so with epidural..one needs to estimate about 7,500 dollars..

hmm! Houston is not cheap o!

hardeymijuh: @WudBMother,

Thanks for the info. Pls advise on available hotels/apartments close to the hospital.

Sometime the internet doesnt give accurate info....as you would have expected.

if you are going to end up staying in an apartment or hotel...why not consider using MIHS or Elpaso...and save yourself thousands of dollars

WudBMother:


If you are interested, I can send you my doctors contact. I delivered in WHMC recently and his fees are quite reasonable.

I am interested too in the dr's contact and the total amount it costed you

@wemba...thank God for safe flight! I wish your wife a safe delivery in jesus name


P.s i think its firsttimers they scrutinize well

I'm married, the unmarried ones are envying me
I have kids, the ones without are envying me
I had normal delivery the ones that had cs are envying me

God really need to deliver a lot of Nigerian women from these mentality!

Life is not a competition and believe it or not some people's life do not revolve around answering 'Mrs'

Neither is it a competition of whose children got into sec school first or got married first! Jeez

Its not a race or 'first/ winner takes all'

I was at the gym in 2009 and two women got into a fight and the next thing we heard was 'that's why you are not married' shuooooo! Marriage don turn badge..the other woman she was abusing was even married, she just doesnt wear her ring to exercise


Coming from someone happily married for almost two years and still in a honeymoon phase self! Breathe in and out...your unmarried friends are not coveting your life....even the bible says it in ecclesiastics..there is time and a season for everything.

The fact that their time hasn't come yet doesn't mean they envy u or covet ur life or that you are even better than them

smokey drinky:

no you didn't get me right. so you are equal to ur male counterpart? wow

no my reason for getting married isn't coz i didn't want to be 30 and single.its bcz there was nothing stopping me from being 20+ and married and coz i realised dat at 30, not only will my kids be on their way to being teenagers, i will be far advanced in my career, i will still have youth by myside and will be living in my children's time et all.... in other words i realised i could have it all, that marriage is not a barrier.

I'm definitely equal to my male counterpart. We are partners....!!!!!!

Dolly-Parton:

I know right! I can't imagine going home to tell my dad I wanna get married while still in school. Am I crazy He would never allow such. He believes its his responsibilty to train us to the level of first degree at least and more if the kid is willing. He tells us often, that he would never allow anyone to train his kids for him. No matter what.
And why do I wanna rush into marraige when am yet to fully define my path in life. If a 23year old is a graduate with a job, I'll say by all means, go ahead and get married. But when a 2nd year, 23year old is thinking about marriage, all I do is wonder what type of upbringing she got.
Abeg I do not want a man or his family to come and start telling me, they made me what I am. That priviledge is for my parents and siblings only.

Omg....i could have written this! What liver would i have used to tell my daddy that i want to marry while i was in school!

I guess it depends on upbringing sha! But i definitely wanted to achieve a lot with my life as an individual first....marriage wasn't even in my radar in school or the first 5 years after school

At 23, i already bought my brand new car myself and was a chartered accountant earning about 300k with 3 years work experience in the bag

Some parent's singular ambition is to see their kids married and they trained them to think being a 'mrs' is a great achievement! I had a friend that at 20, her dad was already harrassing her for husband..So i can't really fault some people's reasoning or comments on here. Its all in the upbringing and mentality.

@op...face your book! If he loves you, he should be 'mr right' and not 'mr. Right now'. he will still be there two years down the line

solidhomes: Nice thread. Thanks to everyone who has been of great help here.
My friend is currently about 14 weeks pregnant and her hubby would like her to have the baby in the US. They have booked a tourist visa appointment for first week in October and are praying they get the visa.
The plan is to go in December, with or without her hubby, and stay till her due date which is late March 2014.
They don't have relatives or friends in the US; my friend has only been to Ghana before, though her husband was in Belgium for a visit like 2 years ago. They will be staying in a hotel in Orlando, Florida, for 21 days, after which her hubby (if he goes with her) will return to Nigeria.
They want to know:
1. After getting the visa, can they cancel their hotel booking and rent a place to stay in Florida till she delivers and returns to Nigeria? How much will that cost?
2. What good and affordable hospitals are there in Florida?
3. This is her first pregnancy. Will she be able to cope with labour and post delivery on her own? Are there caregivers, preferably Nigerians, who can assist in this regard?
4. How can she hide her pregnancy at the point of entry?

1. yes they can cancel and book another place. as per cost go to booking.com or tripadvisor and do some research
2. dunno, but since she has no family I will suggest MIHS or Elpaso (www.doctoresparati.com) as they are cheaper, read the previous pages for more details
3. Check the Elpaso website, you can book caregivers through them
4. she is going early enough, so she shouldn't have a problem, but is she really going to pay hotel cost from Dec to April?

dotunbond:

Hi dear, please what is the name of the catholic hospital in california that your friend used? i intend giving birth in california too. Thanks in advance.

i'l find out the specifics and get back to you

bigdaddyyo: Hi NL. I've been lurking this thread for quite sometime and like you all guys. We would like our 2nd child to be born in the USA. Currently wifey is at the US and we are expecting our little boy early Nov or later of October.

This thread is a big help. We got a maternity package in CA for 15,000 USD (all in) in a private hospital, additional 2,000 USD if CS. This includes stay for 3 days in the hospital after child birth.

Praying for safe delivery. Thanks.

Is ca carlifonia? 15k is expensive o! I have a friend that gave birth in the catholic hospital in carlifonia for about 5.5k in total.

I wish your wife safe delivery

Hey peeps! Try and read previous posts on this thread. Most of the questions being asked especially with regards to visa has been answered over and over and over on this thread. Do yourself a favor and read from the beginning

bamakoe: Hi all,
Entrance at POE was seamless to the glory of God... POE was JFK.

OFFICER: How long are you staying?
Husband: a few months
OFFICER : Are you all returning together the same time
Husband: No I will be back earlier for work but will come back for the family later
OFFICER : Ok .....let me have your thumbprints etc....

The rest is history

Great. Thank God

To my dad for being relentless and never accepting academic averageness

To my school for flinging me out of computer science to statistics...that gave me the wake up call i needed to make a 2:1

To my dad for getting me a good internship which paved the way for my first job and shaped my career

To my dad again for making me take ican....made me better for it

To my first md...for seeing the star in me


To my husband for showing me that every story can be rewritten

To God almighty for helping me turn all my setbacks and failures to stepping stone and for granting me divine favor and quantum leaps in my career

@adeeva pls let her be careful about saying she is here to have her baby at poe...if she is not asked no need to say it since she dint declare at the interview.

Of course if she is asked, no need to deny it. But Since she is going early im sure she can effectively disguise it. Pls read baaby's story of poe. Safe journey to them

beyunce: For any one that wants to know about Methodist Dallas medical Center.
Their estimated cost for both child and mother for 2 days is 7500$ that's withouht physician fee. When they have your final billl. A 40% discount will be applied to your bill. That is for self pay uninsured patients.

so with the discount, it is approx. 4,500...not bad!

nikkygal:




@Uchetobi. . . .You're right about the Methodist hospital cos I know that the one in houston (there's another one in Sugar Land) charges about $6k approx for everything but up till delivery.The costs of the pediatrician, subsequent appointment visits for the baby, immunization & other tests are excluded from this cost. Please plan well and take enough money oh....lol! A friend of mine had her baby there and it was an overall pleasant experience for her as well.

I'll suggest that for people who don't have friends or family to stay with and are on a tight budget, it might be better to use arrangments like El paso or Phoenix as they are set-up to cater to 'out-of-towners' and overall it will probably be cheaper for you. The cost of renting apartments or hotel for like 2/2.5 months is a lot of money. . . .could be as high as $2-$3k excluding additional furnishing you might require.

Thanks darl. My budget is 10k dolls which includes my ticket....i am leaning towards that
methodist but we will see

Congrats baaby at success at poe. I wish your wife safe delivery in jesus name

surety: @bolanle ife,I just concluded wit jaymee today and had our contract signed,I was supposed to have signed with another midwife yesterday but I didn't like the atmosphere of her office. So I called jaymee. She charged 3,500 but I negotiated to 3k for prenatal,delivery and postpartum. Thanks for checking.

So are you going to give birth in your house or she has a birthing centre? Good luck and safe delivery. Pls keep us posted

surety:


Someone also talked about west houston medical centre. Call and find out their charges.

i still have time. I intend to go early at 32 weeks and waka the investigation of all suggested hospitals on ground not on phone

pele dear, that is too expensive for the level of service you received and the comfort you gave up! imagine a new mom spending the night in the lobby! pele dear

I think its worth it self to consider that Elpaso even with hotel charge it wont be up to that

I am going to Houston sha, cuz I have family there. a friend that gave birth in Methodist Hospital Texas said she spent about 6k dolls for everything, including epidural, baby, everything! it's worth checking out for those going to Houston

@mousepad thank God for your victory o! Thats must have been distressing...try and rest....was this your first time to the us?

I think firstimers should endevour to use their visa before they go and d give birth just to clock in sha.

And if you cant, especially if you dint declare you were pregnant try not to mention it at POE. Wear big clothes and do your makeup right before you disembark so you don't look too tired and stressed out.

If you applied with your husband, try and go with him and stand behind him during questioning.


Its well

Seconded. I have a friend that gave birth to her ds1 in atlanta and she wasnt impressed with the circumcision as it wasn't done properly and she had to do it in naija again. for her ds2 she dint bother until she got back to naija.

Most hospitals dont know how to do jewish circumcision which is like naija's...all according to her

Mousepad:

Sorry I'm not sure if its Uchetobi or Tobiojo, i'm confused but its sha one of u (the one that recently entered yankee)...

My dear.its mrs bee that recently entered and i asked her about her experience at poe and she has not responded yet.

tobiojo2002: One needs to be careful with these hosp, they overcharge at times and they also do not give you full details so they can gve one ridiculous bills
One of the Financial counselors suggested something to me so I could reduce the bill.she says I can apply for medicaid for the baby and myself , medic aid pays the hospital and. I can refund medicaid the actual amount paid by them, cos she hinted me that medicaid has a standard amount they pay for mother and baby which is lower than the rate the hospital will quote for self paying patients.
Has anyone heard of this or know anyone who has done ths before?

Personally i would advice you not to go down that route?what if it still shows up in your record? And not all parts of medicaid is refundable...at least that has been the experience of several women on this forum who tried refunding medicaid when they couldnt renew their visa...

Do your research well and opt for a hospital which someone on this thread or someone you know personally have reviewed

Dentale:

I wish you the best Surety. Just to add to Babababy's post, not only do you require a 2 year visa to use the drop box option, also if you are renewing with a spouse that has a 2 year visa, both of you will be interviewed. So no drop box either. Drop box will be valid if you both had a full validity visa within 12 months or less from the stated expiry date. I know this because hubby and I had our visas renewed a month ago in Lagos and the whole process was explained in detail to us.

Check this website http://www.westhoustonbirthcenter.com/. They have a number you can call and discuss self-pay rates. All the best!

If your spouse meets the condition you won't be interviewed either, at least that's the info on The visa website. see below:

Spouses and children under 18 years of age may qualify to apply with parents renewing their visas even if the spouse or children do not meet the above conditions. Please note, however, that children over 18 years must apply independently of their parents even if they are traveling together

Mrs Bee:
Hi, My advice as follows.
Before you go for your interview get another hospital with higher fees accompanied with an invitation letter or an hotel reservation bla bla. This is because at the point of interview the interviewer wouldn't appreciate you presenting documents from a cheap hospital because this is going to seem like you can't afford to pay your bills. Please don't pay for any hospital bill before bin issued a visa, most hospitals won't take money from you anyway because its a long process getting a refund if in the end you aren't issued one. After you done with the whole visa processing you can call MIHS Few weeks to your date of departure to book an appointment with them and they ready to receive you even at 37 weeks. All test and all will be conducted when you get to MIHS. Worry not about a birthing center, worry more about your interview, getting a date, and also proving to the interviewer you can afford tompay for your bills conveniently even when there is a case of an emergency. And pls donot lie about bin pregnant. Because all your history in the us goes into the system. Hope this helps.

I guess you'v entered good! safe delivery

nikkygal:

Yes i had my baby in houston. . . I used West Houston Medical centre! Same hospital walmart talked about on this thread earlier. There are other hospitals you could use in that axis though. . .like Oakbend hospital which is around Richmond, Methodist women's hospital etc and all these still charge within the $5k-6.5k range all inclusive up till delivery (doctor+hospital) as i know people who have had their babies there. Please take note that the costs for the paediatrician and other tests for the baby post-delivery are not included in this estimate.

o great! I am going to Richmond so I guess il be fine

@Nikkygal..I don't know, you are probably right as I don't know anyone that was issued a 3 month visa


DId you give nirth in Houston? what hospital did you use?