₦airaland Forum

Though I don't like the Op, I will try to answer this as detailed as possible.


Let's take this in reverse order:

The "stingy" are those who could spend, but choose not to. They value money more than comfort or approval from others. This could be rooted in a fear of poverty, a lack of self esteem, selfishness or resentment.

The "cheap" are those who do not assess the value of what is spent vs. the benefit derived. They sometimes spend on items that are low in cost, but have no intrinsic value, simply because the item is cheap. They take pleasure from the immediate gratification of owning the item, without considering whether it has quality or enduring utility, or whether the amount spent could yield more if allocated differently.

The "economical" are those who assess the benefit of spending vs the cost. They seek to obtain the best value for, or highest benefit of, their spending. They seek enduring utility or intrinsic value in exchange for their spending.

The "generous" will spend a portion of assets not needed to sustain their needs. They may even sacrifice a measure of their own comfort to relieve a perceived need in others. Sometimes this is an act seeking approval. Sometimes this is a demonstration of power. Sometimes this is performed out of a sense of obligation. Sometimes this is an act of true philanthropy, performed simply because it is possible.

Shugavee:
u n this ur dog meme

Don't blame me O. I learnt it from my good friend marvin906

Segzee1:
Help! My Husband Wants to Divorce me because I am not a Virgin

Hello friends,

Please, I want you to help my friend.

She is currently in a big trouble and if she doesn’t take care of her marriage of two weeks, it will crash.

It all happened that she lied to her fiance then (now husband) that she is a virgin.

According to her, she said that when they first met one of the questions her husband (then fiance) asked was if she was a virgin and because she saw the serious look on him and she didn’t want to lose him, she lied.

When I asked her why she lied, she said that when her husband eventually finds out in marriage, she would beg her husband for forgiveness.

But things did not work out as she had planned for her husband has given her 7 days ultimatum to pack out.

Everyone has begged her husband including me but he didn’t listen to our pleading. He believed that if she can come up with such big lie then she is capable of killing him one day.

Now, a marriage of just two weeks after 2 years courtship is about to crash.

Please, friends, I need your advice on this issue

https://dailyfamily.ng/help-husband-wants-divorce-not-virgin/

Most people here will say the man has no right to want a virgin since he himself was never a virgin, that’s not the discussion here.

The problem is of a simple lie thus leading to mistrust. He wanted a virgin and had asked so clearly. If she lied to him, then that’s her problem.

Right now the man will be asking himself if he can build a lifetime relation with his wife after this lie.

TheUpsetGirl1:
that account has been hacked but what you just said here. you basically mean without money a lady can't stay in a relationship? no matter how much you have there'll always be people who have much than that.

If a guy has to provide some basic necessities she needs, so what will she provide in return? sex?

when guys say things like this I wonder why some ladies won't depend on them.

who's a mumu between us now?
this should be the last time you'll mention me on this forum because you're senseless

Stop with the lies, how come it's only yours that was hacked.

And about telling me to stop quoting you, that's never going to happen. I will always quote and bash the hell out of you whenever you write crap like you always do

Better go and sleep so you can do your midnight browsing like you always do. Mumu

MissWrite:
Your (friend's) husband isn't divorcing you because you're not a virgin. He's divorcing you because you lied and deceived him. So that adds "dishonest" to your lack of chastity; and if he could have gotten over the fact that you weren't a virgin, a liar is a much harder pill to swallow because it's an ongoing situation: once one, always one. It'll be hard to trust you again. That's not a good start to your ever after.

Women should stop working themselves into these tight corners. If you aren't a virgin, own it. Don't be ashamed about it; don't lie about it; don't apologize for it. Not every guy out there prioritizes virginity over everything else. know your selling-point, nurture it, and be sure it is genuine. And then, know your market.

Nice write-up

surgical:
please not only you, including members of your household, and your friends, as many people as possible as you can convince Nigeria must be liberated from shackles of poverty ,hunger, deprivation e.t.c please play your part.

Amen to that bro. I am already doing that. Telling the same to my colleagues at work, friends and family and anyone that cares to listen

We must take back power.

vybzkartel:
What's the danger

The awkwardness of working together should the relationship break-up in future. Well you might be different from me.

As for me I live by 3 relationship rules:

1. I don't date someone working in the same office as me
2. Back in school I never dated anyone in the same class
3. Then those days I lived in rented apartments, I never dated anyone living in the same building/compound as me

vybzkartel:
She is my crush at work
She was always moody around me until I took the first step to send her a Whatsapp message an she replied. Since then we have been chatting.
But anytime she sees me she laughs.. Not loud though

But anytime we happen to kinda bump into each other, she will quickly change her direction to avoid me.

What do you make of this??

Dude office romance is risky. If it works out ok, but when it turns sour trust me you wouldn't want to work there anymore.

You be the judge, is it worth the risk?

Shugavee:
tho i am sexually active atm!! But I know i can do without sex 4 a year if i dont hv a partiner but men r not that way!! Women love sex more than men but men hv more frequent urges!!

The bold face, so very true. Hmm hmmm this Shugavee lady is surprising me lately No more attacks from me from now on

mistyebby:
Haba..calm down.

All MEN AND WOMEN IN GENERAL have heard you!

Abi O My man CAPSLOCKED don vex

CAPSLOCKED:

YOUR SISTER THE OP SAID SOMETHING VERY RETARrDED..
THAT WOMEN CAN GO FOR MANY MONTHS WITHOUT THE URGE, THAT IT'S JUST THE MEN'S THING. SO INTERCOURSE IS JUST LIKE FAVOUR TO YOU, ME AND ALL MEN IN GENERAL.

SO THE PURPOSE OF THIS THREAD IS TO EQUATE SEX WITH MONEY ( ONLY MEN'S MONEY THOUGH). SHE THINKS SEX MUST BE BOUGHT.

I NOW SEE THE REASON WHY SHE WAS DUMPED RECENTLY, AND DIS-ENGAGED. NO LIVING MAN WOULD LIKE TO MARRY SOMEONE WITH THIS TYPE OF REASONING.

I wonder where she was told that women can go for months or a year without needing sex, very funny. My girl literally rips my clothes off me once she is sex starved and all hell will be let loose if I say I'm not in the mood when she is Hot. And this is a soft taciturn pretty lady. So tell me women can stay months without needing sex . The folly

Martin0:
Amu gi ana su oyibo?

Nekwanu onye iberibe, ichesi na mu anaghi anu okwu igbo

CAPSLOCKED:

SOMETIMES YOU TALK WITHOUT WISDOM..
IN FACT, YOU ALWAYS TALK WITHOUT WISDOM.

THE PEOPLE WHO GO TO NATIVE DOCTORS ARE NOT ATHEISTS. THEY'RE CALLED "TRADITIONALISTS", AND THEY BELIEVE IN TRADITIONAL RITUALS AND ANCIENT POWERS.

BEFORE YOU EVER TALK ABOUT ATHEISM AGAIN IN YOUR LIFE, TRY TO HAVE A CLUE ON WHAT IT TRULY IS.
WE KNOW YOU'RE HAPPY WITH ALL THESE LIKES BUT.. YOU JUST HAVE TO SHOW SENSE SOMETIMES.

THANKS.

Sometimes your level of savagery knows no bounds

MissJoy29:
These are my opinions about feminism;
*Strive for fairness especially in the way women are treated in marriage. For instance, it's not set in stone that a woman should be the only one doing house chores. A man can help out too without his manliness reduced. On the other hand, a woman shouldn't take his helping for granted.

*Be independent to an extent as a lady. In the sense that you can have your own money and pay up your bills without having to depend on a man. Depending on a man has levels. It gets really irritating seeing mature ladies begging for everything from a guy. A man that wants to help can help but don't beg.

*There's nothing wrong in helping out a man financially. There's nothing wrong in buying gifts for a man. There's nothing wrong in pampering a man & surprising him once in a while. But use your head. "Using your head" could mean a lot of things & could also prevent a lot of things.

*Be strong and firm yet feminine. That's a woman's strongest weapon, her feminity. Be sweet and gentle and cute.
Stop with the bitching & the bad attitude. That you can foot your bills doesn't mean you give oit that air that you don't need a man. Your independence should attract men to you not repel them.

*Finally, never look down on any man. Never broke-shame a guy because you think he's not up to a level you want. You see, no one knows tomorrow.

These being said, I am a feminist. The real one not the ones moved by hungry, frustrated leeches.

These are the ones I respect

OHCOMEON:
. What makes you think that all those who are going to register for new voters card will vote against Buhari?

Let them go get their PVCs first. The election must be tight and not one sided.

[s]

Martin0:
oga ,see make I help you, I nor sabi speak englishhuuu hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha only me illiterate 40year's hahahah my belle oooo chai my ribs ooo

[/s]

English please

[s]

Martin0:
hahahah these mgbeke boy's will not kill person oooo hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahaha chai 40year's kwa chai ar don die ooo

[/s]

I see you are laughing at your stupidity. 40 years is no joke At your age you should be married and settled somewhere.

Not coming here and constituting a nuisance on the internet. Asslicking girls old enough to be your daughter.

Old man

[s]

Martin0:
oh oh oh, Now ar see, ar don't give fucvks,!
ardont give bruffs!
ardont give Rufus like u, ma gawd earned time, to buchies and bitches like you and whoever u got behind Cam bleeps...

take ur pussy bitch outta ma thread, gaddam mullars ve got nothing to offa nigga,...

hey dammm ar got lost walking! but hey wah don't u and da bitch common and take ar ride?

little bruga

it not yet ma tym to strike, but we niggas don't give ar damm fucvk to hoochies and butches like ya hey ride ya cock head damn dick to that hoochie hole


hahahahahahah hahahahah hahahahah I like this, fun to me

[/s]

I have told you, if you want to communicate with me speak and write in proper English. I don't speak gibberish

At your age see how you write. You are almost 40 years old and still act like a baby. I pity you. Bloody illiterate

Martin0:
mehn nigga adont give a dammm fucvk to tha dammm bad-ass comments yuh got talking abawt! keep tha shiiittt

hey ar got ma origin from tha east! if ar may be asked nigga? am gonna u got depressed!

mortherfucker take ya shiiit outa ma thread, and go get ur ass back to wa it belongs...

#fucvk u nigga#

Dude try and speak proper english. Some of us here are learned and not riffraffs like you

You two faced hoe of a nigga. Talking shit behind peoples back. I am happy you were exposed for the cretin you are in that Lalas247 thread in the family section. You should be ashamed of yourself.

You are a disgrace to all men worldwide. Bloody illiterate. You disgust me

Only weak ass dudes asslick babes online. Real men get their women offline.

TonyeBarcanista:
We are disappointed in this new low of President Muhammadu Buhari and we assure him of the determination of  Nigerians to disgrace him at the poll and unceremoniously send him packing from Aso Rock".

"Buhari's declaration for a fresh term is simply an exercise in futility, a dead on arrival project", The statement concluded.
http://www.trendingistng.com/2018/04/pdp-youths-describes-buhari-reelection.html

At the bold face, if only that was possible. I seriously have my doubts because of the scary antecedents already taking play in the north where a huge number of people (both legal age and underaged) have already gotten their PVCs.

It's no news that in the present list of registered PVC holders the north central and north eastern geopolitical zones presently outnumber those of the middle belt, south east, south south and south west combined.

We all need to go out and get our PVCs. I never voted in the past election but I have gotten my PVC now. Even if my vote doesn't count I will still vote against the APC

Martin0:
this is clearly [b]the reason people from valdosta and Albany [/b]are more respected and treated right...

Keep quoting Albany and the likes, I don't give a fvck - it only goes to show how you reek of inferiority complex as shown from your out of this world asslicking and silly posts. Your attention seeking is extraordinary. I don't care if you're based there but your thinking is no different from the average dude at Onitsha

emelda86:
I have fallen out of love for so long I need love but I can't go about with placards that I need love I really want to be loved by someone who will adore & cherish me...
Some are lucky some are not

Don't give up on love sis. There is someone out there for you. Trust me once you fall in love with the right one nothing else in the world matters. It's a 24 hour feeling of bliss.

From your post I see you've been hurt in the past, and I feel you are the trusting, loyal and loving type. Don't change who you are because of past experiences of being hurt by someone that never appreciated you. I don't know if the fault was yours or from him, but learn from it for future relationships. Cheers

[s]

Martin0:
THE BEST MARRIAGE ADVICE EVER!!




Choose to love each other even in those moments when you struggle to like each other. Love is a commitment, not a feeling.


Always answer the phone when your husband/wife is calling and when possible, try to keep your phone off when you’re together with your spouse.


Make time together a priority. Budget for a consistent date night. Time is the “currency of relationships” so consistently invest time into your marriage.




Surround yourself with friends who will strengthen your marriage and remove yourself from people who may tempt you to compromise your character.


Make laughter the soundtrack of your marriage. Share moments of joy, and even in the hard times, find reasons to laugh.


In every argument, remember that there won’t be a “winner” and a “loser.” You are partners in everything so you’ll either win together or lose together. Work together to find a solution.




Remember that a strong marriage rarely has two strong people at the same time. It’s usually a husband and wife taking turns being strong for each other in the moments when the other feels weak.Prioritize what happens in the bedroom. It takes more than sex to build a strong marriage, but it’s nearly impossible to build a strong marriage without it!


Remember that marriage isn’t 50-50, divorce is 50-50. Marriage has to be 100-100. It’s not splitting everything in half, but both partners giving everything they’ve got!


Give your best to each other, not your leftovers after you’ve given your best to everyone else.


Learn from other people, but don’t feel the need to compare your life or your marriage to anyone else’s. God’s plan for your life is masterfully unique!


Don’t put your marriage on hold while you’re raising your kids or else you’ll end up with an empty nest and an empty marriage.


Never keep secrets from each other. Secrecy is the enemy of intimacy.


Never lie to each other. Lies break trust and trust is the foundation of a strong marriage.


When you’ve made a mistake, admit it and humbly seek forgiveness. You should be quick to say, “I was wrong. I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”




When your husband/wife breaks your trust, give them your forgiveness instantly which will promote healing and create the opportunity for trust to be rebuilt. You should be quick to say, “I love you. I forgive you. Let’s move forward.”


Be patient with each other. Your spouse is always more important that your schedule.


Model the kind of marriage that will make your sons want to grow up to be good husbands and your daughters want to grow up to be good wives.


Learn from other people, but don’t feel the need to compare your life or your marriage to anyone Else. God’s plan for your life is masterfully unique!


Never talk badly about your spouse to other people or vent about them online. Protect your spouse at all times and in all places.


Always wear your wedding ring. It will remind you that you’re always connected to your spouse and it will remind the rest of the world that you’re off limits!


Connect into a community of faith. A good church can make a world of difference in your marriage and family.


Pray together. Every marriage is stronger with God in the middle of it.


When you have to choose between saying nothing or saying something mean to your spouse, say nothing every time!


Never consider divorce as an option. Remember that a “perfect marriage” is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

[/s]

This will only be valid if it comes from a Married person. For now we'll just take this as your usual attention seeking habit

A single guy giving marriage advice. Rubbish

highpriestess:
yes,I'm not one these girls that parade here with pretense written all over there faces.they will claim dependent in one thread,while they beg for alms in another thread.

I can't date I stingy guy.

You're always candid and that's a good thing

highpriestess:
guys are quick to quote where bible said women should be submissive but always skip and forget that the same bible admonished them to take care of the bills.
well,that's there business. if I'm dating you and you show some selfishness and tight fisted attitude I will just dumb your sorry ass.

Was waiting for your comment. You never disappoint

TheUpsetGirl:
do you understand what she meant?

I understand but it's a flawed thinking. I agree with the point of us guys providing the basic stuff but what I don't agree to is the fact that because I am fvcking you I have to be totally (100%) responsible for your every needs. That's just wrong and such warped mindset is a perfect depiction of what entails in Nigeria today. Hence the reason girls keep complaining their guys don't do enough for them and using that as an excuse to go date more guys so they can increase their financial pool.

PrimadonnaO:
Now, take no offence my lovelies, but I feel the need to address a matter.

First of all, this was necessitated by @Upsetgirl's post. Hey, girl, I'm sorry for calling you out, but it's either you're such a huge attention-seeker, you're just nuts or you're simply a guy trolling on Nairaland.

Now, to the guys. Honestly, this issue I'm talking about has well been overflogged. It's irksome the way some of you quickly tag a girl a prostitute. I mean, c'mon. You're dating a girl and shagging, she expects you to take care of some of her bills, and you very quickly start calling all girls prostitutes?

The truth is, if you're with a girl, (whether or not you're fvcking is quite irrelevant), and you claim to love her, it's only natural that you'll do certain things for her. It is no obligation, yes, and she doesn't have to be broke first before you do stuff for her. It's just the way these things work...and it darn well won't be changing anytime soon. It's one of the ways you show care. If you'll do stuffs for a friend or a sibling, why not a girl you claim to love? It's being good, for goodness sake.

Allow me also, to explain why some girls begin to feel really entitled when you're sleeping with them. By default, most girls are not sex-freaked. A girl doesn't do the chase, she can go months and years without having sex. But this isn't the case with guys. A lot of guys go women-hunting basically for sexual gratification. Now, you're with a girl who would otherwise not be fvcking if she wasn't with you, and then you want it all so often, every other day if given the chance. The average girl sees it as her pleasing you, making some sort of sacrifice. So, in her head, it's only fair you do stuff for her, too. I mean, there are tons of other guys out there and she isn't paying them any attention. You're the one taking her time, loyalty and the goodies down there...Lol. While this may be wrong on some levels, it doesn't make her a prostitute either. It's not a business transaction, it's supposed to be a relationship. Feelings are involved. She's not doing it with every other person. She doesn't exactly make those demands like it's her right and she'll sue you if you don't meet them. She probably looks for a button to press, and makes entreaties. That's how she gets you to do things for her.

There's also a percentage of girls who feel you won't be with them if sex isn't involved, or that you'll cheat on them. Still yet, there's another percentage who think sex deepens bond and sh*t like that.

Now, what I personally find wrong in this, is a girl being weak and unscrupulous...sleeping with a guy because you think he'd leave you if you don't. Well, let him go! While I might be an advocate of abstinence, I still know that doesn't work for everyone. But you girl, should only do what you want to do. Forget the sentiments. You like him, you've got the hots for him, you wanna screw him, do it just because you want to, not because you expect him to give you money for it. But if you go about having the hots for every Tom, Dick and Harry and feeling like a 21st chick, so indulging yourself, well that's lack of self-control...promiscuity.

So, to the guys that call every girl a prostitute and say they won't spend a dime on a girl, well, you're deceiving yourself, and most likely, you're broke. No apologies. Oh, yes, and there's the consideration that you've only been attracting leeches who don't care two hoots 'bout you. So, check yourself. A real man, not broke, not bitter, and has got what it takes to attract a decent, smart girl won't come online ranting that all girls have a prostitute mentality. Yes, he knows that there are so many girls like that, but he knows also, that there are a good number who aren't like that...and knows not to make the others his priority. And yea, they know how to take care of their women.

So, dear Mr, who calls all girls prostitutes deserving of nothing, ranting online and typing all manner of obscenities, I'm telling you that you probably have a problem. Look for a solution. Bye!.

Interesting. Nice to see it from your side (ladies) as well.

For the first time I will have to agree with what the mumu poster up there (TheUpsetGirl) has said.

Giving money to your woman is no biggie, any right thinking guy knows that to guard against your girl being snatched by someone else, he has to at least provide some basic necessities she needs.

It becomes a problem when the lady expects you to provide for her everyday living and in the process becomes a leech.

Tessyama1:
Relationship expert, Joro Olumofin has advised single ladies who don't earn at least N150k a month to forget about marriage for now.
He wrote on Instagram;
"If you’re a single lady and you’re not earning at least N150,000 a month you shouldn’t be thinking about marriage yet. This is for your own security & sanity in marriage. Based on hundreds of mails I receive daily from posters. I’ve noticed a trend in behavior : Commitment before finances. Most ladies go into marriage with the hopes that the man will take care of everything . Some even see marriage as their way out of responsibilities such as paying bills, etc. A lot of married women are unhappy in their homes but can’t leave because they are not independent, some don’t even have transport money to go back to their parents house. Secure the bag first"
https://www.amagitesblog.com/2018/04/lady-earning-n150k-month-shouldnt-marriage-joro-olumofin.html

swiz123:
True talk joro

However, not everyone will appreciate this advice, especially my nl friend who works in a buscuit factory

eezeribe:
I hope those hungry girls in romance section would see this especially the UPSET one that sells biscuits and the other office typist that growls like a WOLF.

This post is for those broke hungry nairaland girls like TheUpsetGirl that works in a biscuit factory and earns less than 30k a month

TheUpsetGirl:
what's this one saying??

MISEDUCATIONS:
i bring the money
you bring the hymen.
deal?

GBAM!

CAPSLOCKED:

SHE DUMPED HIM BECAUSE SHE NEEDED A REASON TO, NOT BECAUSE OF HIS STATEMENT.

SEE THE PART SHE MENTIONED "SINGLE AND FREE"...
BABE ALREADY HAD PLANS.

BUT HER BELLY IS LIKE "SIZE 2" COMPARED TO SOME OF OUR OWN HERE WITH SIZE 10+

Morning bro. Men some of our girls just carrying permanent pregnancies (pot belly) for years and they see no reason to reduce it