₦airaland Forum

menxer:
OP, If the old man can see beyond the frumpy empty-nester and you can't see beyond your alleged big eyes, you are truly blind, with due respect.

lol, thanks for that but I doubt you really comprehend my message patently, try and read in between lines for total discernment.i was only trying to send a message to people out there who constantly diminish and loathe their self-cos of their looks.if you look at the subject matter, you will notice ,It was a question asked by a woman and the message was an answer I gave and i chose to share it here.anyways thanks once again.

1. You have to want them to go.

In truth, some people actually want their bad habits to stick around. So the first thing is to go deep into the recesses of your heart and ask, Do I really want to give this up?

You do? Good. Then on to the next step…

2. Make up a list of all of the reasons you want to quit your habits.

Make them positive. Make the list long. Start with the really powerful and dramatic if you need to. Now memorize them. Put them in your mind.

You are making connections between stopping the bad behavior with what good things you will get from doing so. If you want to lose weight, then picture yourself slim and looking good in those skinny jeans. If you want to stop smoking, picture your wife actually kissing you rather than sending you to the bathroom to brush your teeth.

3. Choose.

Once you have the information, this comes down to one thing: an act of the will. Choose to do it. Say to yourself throughout the day, I am choosing to…

Eisenhower rightly said, “The history of free men is written not by chance but by choice, their choice.” It is your choice. You can write your history.

4. Take action.

This is tricky because there are two philosophies about it.

One theory is that you must take massive action—you must go all or nothing. Using the weight loss example, this person would go spend $500 to join a gym, rework their schedule and hit the treadmill every day for a year. They will get rid of all fat in the house. They go all out—and that works for some.

Others would burn out on that, feel like failures and be worse off than before. They should start out slow, taking baby steps but working diligently toward a planned goal. This person would decide to start walking three days a week. They would decide to limit dessert to two nights a week, down from seven.

Either way is OK as long as you get to the goal eventually. Which one are you?

5. Tell somebody.

This is your accountability partner. Tell them your goal and tell them your plan. Write it down for them and have them ask you on regular intervals about your progress. This will prove invaluable.

6. Recover from failure.

Inevitably most people will have setbacks. The key is to have them be setbacks and not turnbacks. Pick yourself up and get going again.

Some people may want to lose 30 pounds and after losing 15, they eat a gallon of ice cream. Then they feel bad and give up. Don’t! Reset your goal for another two weeks and get going again. Chalk it up to experience! Say to yourself, Sometimes you win and sometimes you learn.

7. Reward yourself.

You should regularly congratulate yourself by rewarding yourself with some gift. Start small with small victories and plan a big one when you are finally and for sure over the habit.

Is it that simple? Most of the time, no. Habits are hard to break. There are so many intangibles that it would be hard to cover them all. But this is a simple and workable plan that will help you make great strides if you just apply the principles.

I'm not "mansplaining" or trying to discount how you feel - I'm offering a perspective that might help. Believe me - I know what it's like to dislike your body. i have a big eyes and i sometimes struggle to accept that i will never be as attractive as most guys out there are.

Anyway...I wish I could let you into a man's head as he's falling in love with a woman. It's a process that's so alien, so strange, that I'm afraid you've got to experience it to believe it. But it's as real as death and taxes....

Sometimes, a guy will meet a gal and think nothing of it. Maybe she's a co-worker, classmate, or his buddy's friend. She gets mentally categorized as "Female, acquaintance, feelings neutral". Then, he gets to know her better. If they mesh personality-wise, something fascinating happens in the man's mind. He starts to notice things about her appearance - pleasant things. It starts small - one day he realizes he likes looking at the curve of her nose, or where her ear lobe meets her face.

It's nothing he can put his finger on or describe, really...just that looking at that part of her makes him feel good. He starts wanting to do that more. Then, he notices an expression she makes - could be her genuine belly-laugh, or the way she furrows her brow in concern - and he gets a little flutter in his chest.

They stay friendly for awhile, get to know each other better.

Then, one day, she hugs him goodbye....and he can't stop thinking about it. He plays it over and over in his head - the feel of her breasts through two shirts, her arms around his back, her smell...he finds these little mental movies of her playing unbidden when he's driving somewhere, squeezing out his other usual daydreams.

Shortly thereafter, the guy realizes that whenever he looks at this woman, he feels good. He likes her lines, her curves, her sounds and smells...

It's like she's gradually turned from a black-and-white photo into a 3D color movie with surround-sound - a perfect movie that makes him feel good. He starts wondering what he can do to keep her around, to make her happy. He realizes that he likes looking at her more than any other human being in the world.

To him, she is perfect and beautiful.

A man in love with a woman doesn't see her objectively. There is a filter there or some kind of participatory illusion. He does not see who you see in the mirror. He is seeing someone beautiful and perfect and sublime, and it's one of the most powerful things in his life.

Go watch a happy old couple that's been married for decades. Watch the man's eyes. Sure, he may appreciate some young woman's ass in yoga pants or whatever...but watch his eyes when he's looking at his spouse. If you're paying close enough attention, you can almost see the filter click on when his gaze settles on her. In that moment, he's not seeing the same frumpy empty-nester that you or I see - he's seeing something wonderful.

Are you friendless? Do you feel like no one is ever around when you need someone the most? You are not alone....Below are some possible reasons why you may be struggling with friendship.Below are some of the reasons why you don't have friends.


1. YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP !!!

Friendship isn't about who you have known the longest, it's about who came, stayed by your side and never left you when you needed someone the most

EXPLANATION: valentine, Suzanne, Mariah and the Stranger are ALL your friends. They just serve different purposes in your life. Never discount anyone....


WHO IS VALENTINE?

VALENTINE is the typical friend. Someone who is there to have a great time with and make you smile.Valentine will never be there for you through the rough spots. Maybe he will see you around, maybe not. BUT, Valentine has served his purpose as your friend.

WHO IS SUZANNE?

SUZANNE is the unexpected friend. A person who comes into your life suddenly when you need someone the most. They help you through an immediate hard situation, BUT, the unexpected friend may also come and go. Suzanne has served her purpose, she is also your friend.


WHO IS MARIAH?

MARIAH is the lifetime friend. These friends often come seldom. These are the friends that are always there for you and will drop everything just to be with you when you need them the most. Lifetime friends can be created through the unexpected friend, only they never leave your life....for a lifetime. Mariah is someone whom you may also see very little, but she is always there when you need her. She is currently serving her purpose,

WHO IN THE WORLD IS THIS STRANGER??

THIS STRANGER................

YOUR HEAVENLY FATHER, THE ULTIMATE FRIEND....."Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you (Hebrews 13:5)."

CAN I BE THE FIRST TO INTRODUCE YOU?

"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends ( John 15:13)."


2. YOU ARE UNLIKEABLE TO YOURSELF !!

i am in a very bad mood so nobody better mess with me today dude


EXPLANATION: If you do not like yourself, no one else will. Common knowledge.


RESPONSES FROM YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU ARE UNLIKEABLE:

VALENTINE: " See ya around!"

SUZANNE: "Why are you being so down on yourself? I haven't seen you in forever! Is there anything I can do for you?"

MARIAH: "You really are a wonderful person!! I am coming over!"

STRANGER: "I WILL....." Can somebody let this stranger finish the sentence....this is getting really annoying!"

OK......YOU HAVE GOT TO BE ANNOYED....BUT AT LEAST YOU ARE OFFICIALLY SILENT AND LISTENING.THE STRANGER CAN NOW
SPEAK......!!!!"


3. YOU HAVE UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS!!!


EXPLANATION: Seriously....? Just because you are kind enough to do something for someone else, does not mean that they will return the favor. Never do anything expecting a return. Doing great things for people will always work in your favor, however, it will probably not come from the person you helped.


RESPONSES FROM YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU ARE UNREALISTIC:

VALENTINE: " Soooo sorry, I just do not have the time. See ya around !"

SUZANNE: " I haven't heard from you in forever! Is there anything I can do for you??"

MARIAH: " I am coming over to help!"

STRANGER: "I will....."

STILL NOT ANNOYED BY THIS STRANGER"

"FINISH THE SENTENCE STRANGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"FINISH THE SENTENCE STRANGER!!!!!!! NO ONE CAN READ THAT!!!!"


4. YOU SPEND TOO MUCH TIME ON FACEBOOK.

EXPLANATION: When was the last time you called someone in reality?


RESPONSES FROM YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU ARE ON FACEBOOK:

VALENTINE: " I guess I will see ya around? I will facebook you!"

SUZANNE: " I haven't heard from you forever. Only on facebook! Is there anything I can do for you?"

MARIAH: "I am coming over so we can view my new facebook pictures."

STRANGER: "I will.....?"

"YET!!!!!!!!!!!! STILL NOT ANNOYED BY THIS STRANGER"

"CAN ANYONE EVEN READ THIS NOW......ARE YOU ANNOYED BY THIS STRANGER YET??"


5. YOU ARE TOO JEALOUS !!!


EXPLANATION: Envy is a feeling that can quickly turn into hatred.....


RESPONSES FROM YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU ARE JEALOUS:

VALENTINE: "Since when did you become such a hater?" See ya around!"

SUZANNE: "You have so much going for you! Why would you want to be her?" I haven't seen you in forever !! Is there anything I can do? "

MARIAH: "Jealous?? You are such a wonderful person. I am coming over!!"

STRANGER: "I will.....?"

"ARE YOU ANNOYED YET?"

YET??


6. YOU ARE BORING !!!!!

EXPLANATION: I didn't realize that people stopped living by the age of 35?
RESPONSES FROM YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU ARE BORING:

VALENTINE: " We use to have fun! See ya around!"

SUZANNE: "Is everything okay? You seem different. I haven't seen you in forever !! Is there anything I can do?"

MARIAH: "Something is definitely up! But we can still have fun and talk. I'm coming over!"

STRANGER: "I will.....?"

ARE YOU ANNOYED YET?"

"ARE YOU ANNOYED YET?"


7. YOU ARE DEPRESSING !!!

EXPLANATION: You never have anything good to say. Negativity is contagious. No one wants to catch your disease!!

RESPONSES FROM YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU ARE DEPRESSING:

VALENTINE: "Cheer up! Life is not that bad. Since you can't go to the movies tonight, I guess I will see ya around? Feel better!! "

SUZANNE: "Is everything okay? You seem a bit different. I haven't seen you in forever !! Is there anything I can do?"

MARIAH: " Okay, something is definitely up! I am coming over regardless of what you say. Be there in 5 minutes. Keep the door unlocked and the television on. I am bringing over a movie. I am coming over!!!"

STRANGER: "I will..........??

ARE YOU ANNOYED YET?"
"ARE YOU ANNOYED YET?"
ARE YOU ANNOYED YET??


8. YOU ARE SELFISH !!!

EXPLANATION: This just goes along with being conceited AND mean Double trouble!!!!

RESPONSE FROM YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU ARE SELFISH

VALENTINE: You really really think you are something! Nice hanging out with you. See ya around!"

SUZANNE: " Is everything okay? You seem a bit different. I haven't seen you in forever !! Is there anything I can do for you

MARIAH: I still love ya regardless of how little of your popcorn you share. I will be there in 5 minutes !"

STRANGER: " I will.....?"

"ARE YOU ANNOYED YET?"


9. YOU ARE CONCEITED !!!!

EXPLANATION: No one likes being around a person who literally only sees themselves.

RESPONSES FROM YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU ARE CONCEITED:

VALENTINE: " You really think you are something else? Nice hanging out with you. See ya around!"

SUZANNE. " Is everything okay? You seem different? I haven't seen you in forever!! Is there anything I can do for you?"

MARIAH: I still love ya! Even when you are over the top. I am coming over!"

STRANGER: " I will......."

Can somebody let this stranger finish the sentence....this is getting really annoying!!!!!!"


10. YOU ARE MEAN !!!

EXPLANATION: Being constantly critical of other people is the fastest way to drive people away. Life is hard enough, without the extra added negativity.
RESPONSES FROM YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU ARE MEAN:

VALENTINE: " You are acting like a jerk! See ya around!"

SUZANNE: " Is everything okay? It seems like you are having a bad day. I haven't seen you in forever!! Is there anything I can do for you?'"

MARIAH: " I still love ya. Even when you are being completely mean. I am coming over! "

STRANGER: " I will......??

Can somebody let this stranger finish the sentence....this is getting really annoying!!!!!!"


friend [frend]
1. a person attached to another by feelings of affection or person regard.
2. a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter: friends of the Boston Symphony
3. a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile: Who goes there? Friend or foe?
4. a member of the same nation, party, etc.
5. ( initial capital letter a member of the Religious Society of Friends; a Quaker.
6. a person associated with another as a contact on a social network Web site: We've never met, but we're Facebook friends.

(1)ANYTHING THAT YOU MAY CHANGE YOUR MIND ABOUT

Before you post ask yourself the following questions:
Would I be willing to show these pictures on the front page of vanguard newspaper?
Am I being too degrading?
What would my future or current employer think about this post?
Do I currently owe money? (No better way to find a person who has dipped out on their bills by seeing their facebook status!).
Do I understand what "web cache" means?

Web cache
A folder full of Web pages in the user's computer that is maintained by the Web browser for a period of time. If the local, cached page has not been updated on the Web, it is retrieved immediately by the browser, saving download time.

(2)INTIMATE DETAILS!

We know you want to show off your life but do us all a favor and leave the following details OUT of your posts:
Your sex life (OR PROBABLY LACK OF...)
When you are planning to have children
Personal sonograms
The overbearing make-out pictures
When your last menstrual cycle was?
How big or small "anything" is
Bowel movements..."Why do I have to keep mentioning this one?? Any guesses?"
Your ridiculously long store purchases....?? ALONG WITH THE fake PRICE??!
Anything that should remain underneath your clothing....
Ummm....your relationship "intimate" details...

Many relationships fail because people do not understand to keep certain things between TWO people.


(3)FUNERAL PICTURES??!!!!

NEVER DO THE FOLLOWING!
Post pictures of the actual funeral

Post pictures of the currently deceased member on the internet.
Ask yourself how are you honoring someone by posting images of them in a coffin so the entire world can view it.
Having an open casket funeral is fine for those who agree with it. Sharing those intimate photos...ARE NOT!
Would you rather someone post a picture of you as the person you were, or in a coffin?

To honor you currently deceased loved one, find a picture that reveals who they were when they were alive. The last picture people see is the most lasting impression.
DO IT TO HONOR THEM....

(4)YOUR CHILD'S PICTURE....WITH THEIR NAME PLASTERED EVERYWHERE!!!

This is a child safety issue. Everyone is guilty of wanting to show off their family members, but doing this with your children is just NOT SAFE!
There are predators everywhere who will not only know what your child looks like, but their name, age, location and EVERYTHING YOU POST ABOUT THEM!
Most predators are people you know or someone you have seen before.
The average person has facebook friends they never speak to, but they continue to post their child's entire life history...EVERYWHERE!
Just because you are posting pictures for your only your facebook friend to see, does not mean they have privacy settings similar to yours.

Children are very gullible. All it takes is for an individual to come up to your child, call them by name and gain their trust by telling them EVERYTHING YOU POSTED!
FOR EXAMPLE:

"Hey, valentine!
Remember me? You are so cute! All grown up! Wait...you don't remember me, do you?
Well, I can never forget a pretty face like yours. You mother Helen and I work together. She talks about you all the time. I know you love fudge and your favorite color is yellow! How about you jump in my truck for a bit! Your mom says it's okay, She sent me here because she was going to be running a bit late. Don't Worry........"

FOR CHILD SAFETY TIPS
Start personalizing who you send your child's picture to.
It is easier to track down who you have given your pictures to, if you minimize.
Never post your child's name, age, date of birth, and where they attend school.
Talk to your kids about strangers....everybody is NOT your friend and NOT their friend.
Put your child's safety above your ego!

(5) CONTROVERSIAL ISSUES...GAY,STRAIGHT,BLACK,WHITE,UGLY,FAT....

We live in Nigeria, so we should be able to say whatever we want!!! Right??"

Wrong!!!!!
You are allowed to post and say whatever you desire, but always remember that someone is watching what you post.
There is an appropriate time and place for everything; posting highly degrading material may sabotage you in the long run. If you start posting signs about how much you hate fat, ugly, stupid, black, white, Asian...etc...there is a 100% chance that those messages will fall in the wrong hands.
Vital relationships can be severed by posting degrading material. We all come to the point in our lives where we need help. There is no quicker way to burn bridges than to post hate statements about the characteristics of other people.
CONSTANT NEGATIVE STATEMENTS ONLY HURT YOU!


(6)CONSTANTLY CHANGING YOUR RELATIONSHIP STATUS!

DO NOT WORRY ABOUT HOW OTHER PEOPLE VIEW YOU,

JUST REMEMBER....PERCEPTION IS REALITY

"I am not really sure if this is wrong, it just makes you appear HIGHLY unstable, or a liar,
whatever comes first...."

"Do not allow what you consider good to be spoken of as evil
(Romans 14:16)."


(7)UPDATING YOUR LOCATION EVERY SECOND

"Why does everyone need to know your every bowel movement??

REFER TO NUMBER 08

(WHEN YOU ARE GOING ON VACATION!

Everyone is excited when they go on a beautiful vacation, however, I would always refrain letting all of your Facebook friends know exactly when you are going and returning.
People steal....mostly someone you know.
If you choose to brag about your whereabouts, only tell a few during the time of the vacation. AFTER you return, you can brag all day long!

PROTECT YOURSELF AND YOUR FAMILY


(9)HEAVY USE OF PROFANITY!

Whether you like it or not, in this country there is a reason why we call certain words "bad."
Today, saying these words is no longer the problem....writing them is!!!
Because these "potty" words have a bad stigma attached to them, IT A BAD IDEA TO POST THESE WORDS!!!!!
Bad language also includes using hate words, slander or victimizing other people.

Why?

"Perception is reality. If you ever want a career or a chance of respectable relationship..."

"Yes, you can say whatever you want, but understand for every behaviour their are consequences!!"

"If your purpose is too bad mouth someone else, you are only bad mouthing yourself...keep it clean!"


STOP WRITING DIRTY WORDS!!!!!
"Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble
(Proverbs 21:23)."


(10)PICTURES OF YOU PARTYING HARD, SMOKING AND INDECENT DRESSING

Everyone wants to enjoy life. But in today's internet world, anything you post could last a lifetime. Many people find these photos highly entertaining and they are....until you realize they will continue to resurface FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!
Your so-called friends are probably busy copy, pasting those and sharing them with other people. They are not laughing with you, they are laughing AT YOU!
If you are using pictures like this for attention, this is the wrong way to go!
Any associate who does this to you, IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
These photos are downloaded worldwide and posted on websites for the enjoyment of many people.
Try to take down as many obscene photos as possible and move on...

IF YOU SEE A FRIEND WITH CRAZY POSTS:
Do not laugh, this is not funny!
Do not share!
Encourage your friend to TAKE THE PICTURE DOWN!
You are not being a true friend if you are participating in permanently humiliating another person.
What if someone did that to you?
And if you are using this as a revenge tactic...
What goes around comes around!"
Displaying another person's humiliating moment that could potentially destroy their career or relationship, just makes you a weak person!
Revenge is never sweet and it will NOT make you feel better in the end.
Strong people never do things to hurt another person purposely and if they do...the never kick someone who is already knocked down, they wait until they are standing straight.

"'Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people,
but love your neighbor as yourself
(Leviticus 19:18)."

(1)I’m a good bet for someone who wants a long-term, stable relationship: pretty decent income potential and pretty good with managing my finances.

(2)I love God and i am a God fearing Christian

(3)I love cooking. I’m pretty much an artist in the kitchen. No recipe. Give me the ingredients and I’ll make you something delicious.

(4)I believe in working to live rather than living to work. Whoever I end up marrying or dating long-term is going to go on a lot of romantic getaways.I’m a pretty decent lover who gets off on getting you off. That’s literally the most exciting thing for me.

(5).I am a good listener; whether it be a useless and totally out of place conspiracy theories or a recipe for the new dish you learnt to cook, I am all ears.

(6)I prefer to avoid expensive restaurants, movie halls, and shops. I spend, but wisely. I would rather cook, buy a home theatre and wait for discounts.

feel free to add yours

These are certain things i would definitely want my better half to say to me at times when i finally find one
(1)Call me when you're done with your friends. (Not in an angry tone)

(2)You're driving!!! okay, call me after you reach somewhere.

(3)Wanna go for a party?? Don't forget to enjoy yourself!!

(4)Let's talk when you're free.

(5)Okay I won't disturb you while your football, tennis or F1 matches.

(6)Let's booze together.

(7)Let's split the bill.

(Let's watch your preferred flick. (alternate times)

(9)It's okay. No issues.

(10)Shall we? shall we make love and have sex

(11)I am SORRY.

fee free to add yours guys

smh this is ridiculously amusing,prolly oka as starter,akpu as main course and coke with cigarette as desert..what a combination..enjoy dude

There are many reasons why most Nigerian ladies are single. Here are the common ones

1. Search for the perfect man

Most ladies who end up becoming old spinsters must have waited in vain for Mr. Perfect and while the suitors kept coming, no man was ever good enough for her.

It was either the men were not rich enough, handsome enough, not tall enough, was not romantic enough or was not good enough in bed.

They build castles in the sky on the kind of perfect man they want, becoming choosy and dump the serious men that came their ways and in the end, the search would continue into their old ages.

2. Miss Independent

Many ladies will usually have at the back of their mind that career first in an effort to become independent. and do not have the time to get married when their mates were doing so.

They pay more attention to their careers and neglect their private lives but by the time they realize, time is far gone and they start running from pillar to post looking for any available man.

Some of them who managed to get into relationships fail to balance their affairs and professional time, paying little or no attention to the feelings of their partners even when their partners complain bitterly.

They are quick to tell any man that they are independent and can stay on their own without any man dictating to them.

3. Feminism

Most ladies have taken feminism to another level with their constant advocacy for women’s rights on the ground of the equality of the sexes.

They feel they have equal rights with men and as such, no man can tell them what to do. By so doing, they place themselves on a pedestal that makes it difficult for the men to approach them.

Some of them do not know where to draw a line and keep saying they do not need a husband to be fulfilled. This may be true but everyone needs a companion in old age.

4. The eligible men are not ready for marriage

Most ladies will quickly say that the eligible men are not ready to get married as some of them are either jobless or struggling to make ends meet.

5. Experience of past heartbreaks

Some women are very emotional when it comes to relationships and when they are hurt, they find it difficult to get past it and move on with their lives.
This goes to show that some ladies who have gone through several heartbreaks find it very difficult to ever give men another chance in their lives as they always tend to think that all men are the same.

They put on a very strong front once their relationship becomes a disaster, especially when they were expectant of marriage in the relationship.

6. Laziness

Some ladies are so lazy that they do want to be involved in domestic chores. Many of these are either caused by their parents who either over-pampered them or refused to allow them to take part in household chores.

Most of them forget they are Africans and believe as the world has moved on, men should also move on and not expect them to stoop so low to do the domestic chores.

7. Impudence

Some women are so difficult to manage that it becomes virtually impossible for any man to keep them in check.

Such ladies believe they are always right and no matter a man does, she would want to let him know she knows better than him.

Men want women they can control and not the ones that would challenge them in their homes.

8. Double dating

Most women who indulge in keeping many men at the same time find it difficult to settle down with one of the men because there are things they are attached to in each of them.

They erroneously believe they cannot put all their eggs in one basket and as a result, they get confused and end up losing the one person who was ready to take the relationship to the next level.

Many ladies spend most of their youths indulging in frivolities like partying non-stop and flirting around and when they are ready to settle down, the men would stop coming.

9. Family expectations

So families indirectly make it difficult for their daughters to get married with the high expectations they put on them and their husbands-to-be.

In some societies, it is known that getting married can be very expensive and as such, men dread getting married from such places and in such a situation, the ladies would end up without a husband for many years.

10. Pressure from family

Some families also put undue pressure on their daughters to get married and take up some responsibilities in the home. The ladies, in turn, put pressure on the man they are dating to come home and do the right thing.

Some men would not like to withstand such pressures and for them, the sensible thing to do is to get out of the relationship fast so as not to be bogged down.

(1)Chicken contains 266% more fat now than it did 40 years ago.

(2)Tea is the most consumed drink in the world after water

(3)Pure Honey is the only food that doesn’t rot. It can last more than 300 years.

(4)Airplane food is not tasty because the altitude decreases the sense of your taste.

(5)Ketchup was sold as a medicine in 1830.Ketchup was used as a medicine in the 1800s to treat diarrhea, among other things.

(6)Eating bananas can help fight depression.Best fruit ever!

(7)Apple floats on water because 25% of their volume is made of air.

(Cucumber contains 96% water so lots of cucumber can make your skin riveting and fresh always

(9)Cheese is the most stolen food in the world

(10)Eating Citrus fruits like Orange and Mosambi will make your skin shine. True. No fair and lovely. Just eat and be lovely.

(11)Eating raw tomatoes everyday morning which has vitamin B6 will help your body attain sufficient immunity.

(12)Coconut water can be used as blood plasma in case of health emergency

(13)Potatoes can absorb and reflect WiFi signals..it's so real and true, i have tried it a couple of times.

(14)Pineapple is a natural painkiller

(15)Onions are natural antibiotics

(16)The only food that provides all the nutrients human need is breast milk

(17)Beetroots, banana,fish,garlic, watermelon olive oil, fresh green, and bitter leaf can spice up your sex life.

thanks for reading..feel free to add yours

We have many churches in Nigeria because churches are profitable.

Those who recognize this and play “the game” are enjoying millions of dollars today by milking many Nigerians dry. Sadly, those being sucked dry remain faithful pawns to any willing smooth-talking, Bible-toting criminal. I could return to Nigeria today as a son of Miracles” and I’d be on my way to claiming a million dollar empire. God! That sounds GOOD!
We have very few Christians in Nigeria. We’ve all become churchgoers!

There are 2 reasons why the church-culture is growing in Nigeria.

1. Persistent desperation (see the roads I shared below).
When you travel on roads like this, you pray to God (of course through your pastor/church, after sowing seeds) to keep you safe. Let’s not ask the Nigerian government to give us better infrastructure. Let us continue praying because God will NEED to touch the hearts of the Nigerian government before they do the right thing or come down himself to give us our basic amenities.
Pray harder!!

2. Get rich quick scheme
Both the pastors and their congregation are guilty of this. The pastors steal from the members, and members are deluded into thinking that if they sow enough “seeds” they’d become millionaires overnight. Who has this ever worked for?!
What actually happens when you sow “seeds” is that your pastor would become an overnight millionaire! You get poorer!
The only thing many Nigerians understand is MIRACLES. We don’t understand hard work or common sense. We understand MIRACLES, even when it does not make sense.
When I was in Nigeria, I would follow some of my friends to some night vigils, and some miracle prayer houses. As events unfolded in the church, I always felt like I was at a car dealership
I perpetually felt patronized. I would roll my eyes to the heavens seeing how pathetic and desperate many of these pastors were. I felt sorry for them. Hunger is a bastard! It’d make you eat your own legs to stay alive. Haha! It made me sad that my friends could not see what I saw. I kept my thoughts to myself because you don’t waste your time reasoning with the lost ones. When I tried, I lost!
I don’t know why I was like this. Maybe my Catholic upbringing is just used to the idea of accountability. I do not trust any man who runs a show by himself and remains accountable to no one. Maybe I was the devil himself or my Catholic upbringing is just used to order, not chaos in the form of praying against witches and wizards who might not even be interested in us.
I mean, if I was a witch, I would be too busy flying all over the world on my broom, passport and visa-free, to worry about paranoid Christians who don’t even have constant electric power. They’d bore me to death so I think I’d party differently. I’d go to Norway, which is currently ranked best country to live in.
If I were the devil, I will not be in Nigeria. “Isn’t that country in a recession? Aren't they a developing country? I’m outta here!”
I will go to other developed countries and either chill or bring them to ruins!
If you ask me, I think Nigerians need to invest the same level of energy we give to prayers to ensuring our elected officials keep their word and utilize public funds to make life easier for everyone.

Nevertheless, i still remain a roman catholic and happy Sunday yall.

so let's hear your own reason(s) why there are many churches in Nigeria today

In most cases, the marriage satisfies your dad, mom, sister, brother, first cousin, second cousin, grand father, grand mother, long lost uncle, his dog, pesky aunt, her husband, her mother, her mother in law, your neighbors, their parents, their children and a thousand others who attend the wedding. You know whose name is missing in the long list? Yours. That’s a flaw that is bigger than 1000 Jupiters put together.

Breakups or failed relationships are reminders that you're better off without a certain person than with him/her. Otherwise a break up wouldn't have occurred in the first place. There is no such thing in an arranged marriage. No second chances to find the right partner. Being single is better than ending up with a wrong person.

share your opinions

Insecurity is a normal human emotion that just about everyone experiences. So no, it doesn't automatically kill a relationship.
It's a question of degree. How often do you feel insecure? How intensely do you feel it? And most importantly, what do you do when you feel it?
If you frequently feel deeply insecure, and then you mistreat your partner as a result — accusing, snooping, controlling, withdrawing — then yes, you will harm your relationships.

Being insecure – in life, at work, in relationships – is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
This means that my behavior and my actions cause what I predict to come true.
In other words: I cause what I fear.
Some examples can be:
I am afraid of getting hurt and therefore will close myself off from relationships (this guarantees pain and isolation.)
I am going to sit alone because no one will want to sit with me (and people see me eating alone and assume I don’t want company.)
I am going to assume you will leave me and will, therefore, be paranoid and hypervigilant (suffocating the relationship).
If we let our insecurities dictate our behavior, our insecurities will strangle everything.

share your views and ideas pals

wetin concern me?i am ugly and happy

1. Engineers have a lot of free time.

No matter how many subjects they have, and however tough those might be, attendance shall always be a problem. So those 4 years is actually about wandering around the city you live in and eating out a lot, than it is about getting a degree!
You will never hear an engineer say that he or she does not have time!

2 They are extremely organized

It’s no secret that engineers tend to be somewhat particular about where their things go. They like to have easy access, up-to-date technology, working solutions, and organization in their world. Perhaps their idea of organization is not the same as yours, but being with an engineer means respecting their ways, as intruding in their system can be disruptive to their balance and ability to be productive. And you will enjoy leading an organized life with your loved one.

3 They know how to handle high-pressure and stressful situations well

Engineers encounter a lot of high-stress situations at work, and they know they can’t lose their minds. This is actually a great thing for you if you are the partner of this logical type because that means he or she won’t join you on the emotional rollercoaster and instead be a calming force in the relationship.

4 They absorb information quickly

Men and women in the engineering profession acquire acute attention to detail. Not only does this mean they will want that specific type of cheese and will go to the store late at night just to get it, it also means they will remember special dates, things you said, small details, and be extremely thoughtful when in a relationship. They won’t necessarily show it in a lovey-dovey way – but they will remember to get you that one thing for your birthday you mentioned briefly months ago, and not even make a big fuss about it.

5 They have no problem committing to someone, or to something

Engineers are some of the most dedicated people, and they will work on one thing until it’s perfect. Committing to such a demanding career shows that they are not short-sighted, and this can translate to how they view their personal relationships as well. They don’t like to waste time with too many relationships, and would rather have more serious, quality partnerships. Quality over quantity can ring very true with this group.

6 They are actually very creative

The myth that engineers are math nerds could not be further from the truth. Engineers actually have to be very creative to come up with solutions for impossible problems on a daily basis. This sort of creativity requires a lot of brain power however, so many engineers blow off steam by doing something else creative, like playing an instrument, painting, or working on a “fun” project that tunes their ever-thinking brain out. Your home will never be a boring place.

7 They have the ability to think logically, think ahead, and make a plan

Being an engineer means you always have a plan. Whether it’s for the weekend, your next trip, your meals, your future, or your finances. Sometimes it can be difficult to keep up with their level of brain organization, but you can rest assured that you are ultimately safe, and do not have to worry about a thing.

8 They are not lazy

Engineers never really rest. Even on their days “off”, they continue to engineer away in their mind. They may put off a project for a while to let the solution come to them, but they don’t give up and rarely get discouraged. They know there will be a solution – they just have to find it. This makes them incredible partners because they are willing to put work into solving your relationship problems until there is a resolution.

9 They have a lot of initiative and re-engineer everyday problems to find better, more functional solutions

This does mean that you will find their “solutions” around the house. Solutions for leaky pipes, or solutions for the neighbor’s cat who keeps leaving presents in your lawn. Nevertheless, they solve everyday problems themselves, without having to call a professional. You can trust that if your house is flooding and the roof is on fire, they will figure something out.

10 They have an impressive ability to admit mistakes and re-work their approach

Because their work can require a lot of trial and error, engineers learn to rethink their strategies constantly. This translates nicely into relationships, as it makes them more likely to examine a behavior that may not be producing very good results (and making you mad) and look for ways to change it to achieve better results.

If you are lucky to have found yourself one of these gems, celebrate their qualities, appreciate their talents, show that you see how hard they work, and most of all, enjoy the perks of having such a thoughtful partner!

11 They can be really charming- after all, they have had so much practice with talking teachers into not failing us.

They have the best experience in convincing and being a charm to any one, indeed.

12 They are dedicated – it takes a great deal of effort and mental strength to study the same subjects over and over again.

What more could you possibly want from your significant other?


13 They will never forget dates and anniversaries because they are used to mugging up stuff.

Say goodbye to those “How can you possibly forget…?” fights… Engineers can recite a load of crap… even if they don’t understand it!


14 They are made for long-term relationships… 4 (or more) years of engineering has taught them to keep calm and carry on.

Engineers- Solving problems they didn’t know they had, in ways they don’t understand.



Who am I kidding? Engineers are special and the best

PROUDLY AN ENGINEER, IF YOU ARE ONE, YOU ARE SPECIAL AND BEST AMONGST ALL EQUAL.

cocoderm is also good,thats what i am using and its awesome, used palmers cocoa butter before and it was darkening my skin and wen i changed to cocoderm ..my natural skin colour came back

wetin concern me, i am from Biafra biko

Many people realize they are addicted to sugar when throughout the day, they would often find themselves craving something sweet and comforting that would give them a little lift. Have you become a sugar addict? Are you eating too much sugar? Below are 10 warning signs you’re eating too much sugar.

1. Tiredness And Lack Of Energy

A constant feeling of tiredness or fatigue is one of the biggest signs you’ve got too much sugar in your diet. Although high-sugar foods can give you a big carbohydrate boost and temporarily lend a feeling of increased energy, the crash that comes afterward is a daunting one.

Feeling tired all the time may be a sign that it’s time to reexamine your diet to see if you’re eating or drinking too much sugar.

2. Sugar Or Carb Cravings

If you find yourself craving the sweet flavor of sugary snacks on a daily basis, chances are you’ve become a sugar addict.

Sugar consumption can create a chain reaction of sugar cravings because it is so sweetly addictive. If you hear the carbs calling your name with every move you make, you could be in the throes of a deep sugar addiction.

3. Frequent Colds And Flu

If you find yourself falling ill more often than you used to, it could be due to having excessive sugar in your diet. If every virus that goes around seems to find you and make you sick, it could be due to your penchant for sugary treats.

Consumption of too much sugar can weaken your immune system, making your body’s natural ability to fight off colds, flu viruses, and even chronic disease weaker than it would be if you avoided foods with added sugars.

4. ANXIETY OR DEPRESSION

Just as eating a lot of sugar can make your body physically crash, it can make you emotionally crash, as well. Once sugar’s energy-boosting effects have worn off, the physical fatigue of the sugar crash may be accompanied by psychological fatigue.

Feelings associated with depression, such as lethargy, sadness, and social withdrawal, may be experienced by sugar addicts.

Feelings of anxiety, such as nervousness, feelings of impending doom, and constant worry, may also be a sign that your sugary diet needs adjustment.

5. SKIN AND FEET PROBLEMS (INCLUDING DARK CIRCLES UNDER YOUR EYES)

Sugar has an inflammatory effect on the body when it is eaten, so it can also contribute to inflammatory skin problems.

If you find yourself suffering from acne, rosacea, eczema, or even just excessive oiliness or dryness, sugar could be to blame. Some people find that cutting sugar out of their diets greatly improves their skin problems not to mention their overall health.

Sugar could also have an inflammatory effect on your feet. This inflammation could appear in your foot as plantar fasciitis, which causes pain in the thick band of tissue that runs across the bottom of your foot, in your heel, or elsewhere in your foot.

6. WEIGHT PROBLEMS

The human body is set up to accommodate a limited amount of sugar. When the body has had its fill and the sugar keeps pouring in, the sugar calories end up being converted to and stored as body fat.

This can quickly lead to weight problems like obesity and weight problems carry a risk for a host of health problems, such as high blood cholesterol levels, cardiac problems, sleep apnea, and more.

7. HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE

Blood pressure problems may not be due to the sodium in your diet, but rather, to the sugar in your diet.

In one 2010 study performed by researchers at the University of Colorado, more than 4,500 adults were studied and the data gathered showed that there was a link between high blood pressure and excessive sugar consumption.

So, if you have high blood pressure, don’t be too quick to blame the salt shaker without looking at your sugar intake, as well.

8. DENTAL ISSUES

Virtually everyone has heard that sugar is no good for your teeth, and it’s the truth. If you keep finding yourself in the dentist’s chair due to constant cavities requiring fillings and root canals, it could be the sugar you eat causing the problem.

Sugar likes to work its way into the nooks and crannies in your teeth, where it can rot away tooth enamel and infiltrate your teeth, causing painful dental problems.

Sugary drinks could be to blame for white patches on your teeth. Sugar causes damage to the protective enamel on your teeth causing them to have a white stain-like appearance.

9. DIABETES

Eating too much sugar or sugary foods can cause weight gain, and weight gain can increase your risk for developing type II diabetes.

Even if you haven’t ever been diagnosed as full-on diabetic, many people are pre-diabetic and don’t even realize it.

If you find yourself constantly thirsty or hungry in spite of regular eating and hydration and feel flushed after a sugar binge or extremely weak and off when you skip a meal, you may wish to talk to your doctor about your diabetes risk. There are other early warning signs of diabetes that you shouldn’t ignore.

10. HEART PROBLEMS

A sugary diet has the potential to wreak havoc on the heart.

In a study conducted on rats at Case Reserve Western University, a high-sucrose diet was found to hasten death and increase risk for cardiac issues more than high-fructose, high-fat, or high-starch diets.

These findings cannot be applied directly to people, as the subjects in the study were rodents, but since excess sugar intake does increase the risk of developing illnesses that have a negative impact on heart health in humans, it’s not a far leap.

for me: No.

At least not in its former guise. I'm a believer in one Nigeria but when Nigeria continues to do so poorly, it is inevitable that people will clamor for separation thinking it is the solution. It isn't.

The South-south does not uniformly aspire to be part of Biafra. And the economies of the Igbo dominated states cannot thrive without access to the seaports. No import-export? No economy in the Biafra. Try selling goods that have to be flown in or double taxed at another country then at your local border.

The current agitation for Biafra is more of political and not for the freedom of their people.

The Igbos leaders supposedly to lead the movement are divided

Those in favor of this movement have little-to-no knowledge on it.

They dont follow the necessary procedures.

Some of the movement leaders are massively corrupt.

A lot of disunity among the people calling for the freedom of Biafra. e.g. Some groups want to be free while some need the control of the oil.

A lot of corrupt people are running the movement which means they can easily be manipulated by the political class.

Most Igbos are against the idea of breaking away.

They are not taking the right step in the movement.

Nigeria will only reach its true potential with a true federal system that allows the best of each state to shine. This will lead to innovation and growth in the country.

Where is Biafra going?

Biafra is heading nowhere! This is very clear.

Their agitations are valid and they have the right to do so.
However, they seem to stand for nothing. Take a look at Nnamdi Kanu. What is his ideology? What does he represent as a person?
Unfortunately, he has shown that he is not a man of integrity. It is obvious he talks from both sides of the mouth. A few years ago, he was for the Unity of Nigeria. All of a sudden, he has switched side.
Funny enough, he wasn't arrested for his agitations. He was arrested for committing a crime!
Secession is a serious issue, yet when you listen to any of Nnamdi Kanu's speeches, it is so shallow. Rather it is laden with empty threats garnished with short -sighted visions and blabberings.

At this rate, Biafran agitators cannot actualize anything.

Avoid doing the following..

Buying presents
Buying flowers
Listen to her problems. You’re not her therapist.
No good morning text. WTF? You’re not trying to be her friend. You want to date her so focus on that.
You’re not her entertainment. She can watch a movie or some clown. If you try being some entertainment then you will struggle with being consistent about it. It becomes a drag later on.
Avoid doing these because she hasn’t earned the attraction.

Attraction has always been = status.

Status is = behaviour.

That behaviour above is supplicating, begging and pleading. If a girl got problems with trust and so on, you cannot fix her or change her.

You be you, approaching and be direct in an appealing way. You don’t need to bribe a girl. Any you find who need that are not worth your time.

That’s a red flag for you already if she expects that and thinks she’s entitled for things just to ask her out on a date.

Remember, how you start is the reflection of who you are and frames everything from there to wherever it goes.

Behave supplicating and you then are treated as such all the way.

Under 3 seconds or less, a girl has made a decision already. So no use trying all the supplicating like she’s not your equal.

Think about it for a moment not in fantasy but real world.

How would you feel if someone you don’t even know or do know, walks up to you and starts showering you admiration, gifts, presents, flowers?

You’re alarm bells will go off.

You’re not lovers.

You’re not dating.

Even if friends, it feels weird.

“Oooh what does he want from me mmmm?”

Make your intent clear and direct by your actions not by buying her affection. Be very wary of girls who desire this to be asked out on a date. It is unbalanced. This is not some game, shit test which some do to see if the guy is serious.

No one is shit testing anyone today not on from my answers. Be on equal footing, eye to eye, human to human being.

I have a huge respect for girls, huge respect when they don’t expect me to buy anything when asking for dates, going out and even sex, relationships. I like to do that sincerely when giving, not because it’s a shit test.

That’s the girls who accept you for who you are, are gold and have their head screwed right and their whole spirit is planted on solid reality ground. The ones who do get hurt, are girls up to their eyeballs with fantasy and prince charming, and they are the first when infatuation is gone, look for another shiny object.

You’ll be walking on eggshells because anything you say she doesn’t like, is so bad and a criticisms to her ego and starts doing all kinds of games and she thinks she can because you approached in a supplicating way instead of screening girls out, filtering them out to get to the one who isn’t full of mess.

Girls talk about guys being their equal.

Ok then. You don’t need to buy her anything to ask a girl out.

Of course some girls want that but believe me, what they say and what they do is a different thing altogether.

When you do these things, she will feel you are buying her attention, buying for her body and sex. It sends a massive red flag, Massive.

Second, no girl is a princess and we are not prince charming and knight.

You approach and find out if she is mutually attracted to you without any bribery, flowers, gifts and trying to be some pal.

You are her equal.

Behave as such and she needs to behave in that manner as well, without looking down at you and thinking/behaving she is superior.

I have never done any of the above, never, Nor have my friends. I have seen guys do that and get nowhere. They get used. They emotionally invest lots of time on a girl who then doesn’t follow through because she’s a gamer. She just wants attention and nothing else but that.

Then I walk up with doing none of the buying, flowers and gifts to date, for her to also desire same as me and we are compatible.

Then the nice guys who did all that supplicating start looking at me, getting all mad at guys like myself and call us assholes for a girl to say YES.

I am an asshole because I didn’t buy gifts, supplicate to her, being direct, revealing who I am and want? I am the player, the jerk who went up to a girl with nothing but myself and had fun, talked, flirted, and she said yes?

Has nothing to do with that.

I didn’t put a girl up on a pedestal. I am the one who screens the girl in or out. I am showing who I am and she can say yes or no right there.

I flipped it so there is game so now, rejection for me isn’t even that. It is me seeing if she is sexually attractive available to me or not.

If no, I found out what I need to know.

If Yes, we move forward.

Rejection then doesn’t hit me like it does to most guys.

And I’m a bad boy, player, jerk, asshole for being honest on what I want, not hiding and removed the mask to be real?

I don’t believe in the “one” in that way.

I know girls who want that are trying to rope me into a relationship and they will dangle sex for months on end. The ones who I approached without any of that were girls who got the head screwed right.

You know how I easily know girls on here and anywhere who frame a connection into a “relationship.”

Here’s their language..

“I don’t see looks. I see personality.”

Translated, de-coded..

“I got hurt dating good looking guys, already slept had sex, had my fun, got hurt real bad, and now…I don’t look for the looks anymore but want a relationship, so I will take my time on a guy and dangle sex, because that way I can keep him hooked.”

Healthy emotionally and minded girls know..a relationship cannot be predicted and framed. You can’t fix or change a guy.

It takes time, trust and you cannot buy attraction. Those who want to be bought like that are girls I stay well away from.

I approach, be direct, being fun, flirt and then ask out. I make my intent clear and if that is not good enough for her, that’s her problem. I’m not going to beg and buy her out and invest tons when I don’t need to.

I just want a Yes or a No, and I can get that and so can you in minutes of the interaction. It saves you a lot of pain and frustrations, looking for signals and orbiting around her doing all these things.

You want something, you be clear about it and let that person know. Then it’s just a matter if Yes or No.

Approach
Flirt, be down to earth, fun. Less serious
Find out if she’s available. Be direct.
If no, move on
If yes, move forward, suggesting something, exchange number.
Text and phone for the goal = dating.
The first date if local would take a week or less.
Without buying, giving gifts and being her emotional tampon impress her. It is equal. She needs to also show she’s mutually attracted to you but if she acts like a princess wanting all that, let her go.

Because she’ll expect all that all the time and wonder why you don’t do that anymore. If you be yourself in a manner of being consistent to you, then you don’t raise the expectations of girls to believe you as someone else.

It makes it easier for you and girls you date later on.

You are enough.

She’s enough.

It’s just a matter of finding out if you’re both attracted to each other.

Approach knowing you are enough and if she says no, move on and approach others. Avoid putting any girl on a pedestal.

Short Version:

Dad!!! What makes a man decide to marry?

Hmm, well life is like a rocket. Lots of brilliant people come together to shape your future and prepare you for a mission. Your parents, siblings, teachers, friends lift you off the ground and propel you to great heights and slowly they all fall off and you keep revolving up there all lonely and admiring life from a distance.

So I will be dead, your mother will be dead, your sister will go her own path, your friends will have little to no time for you ...... and there you are all alone in a world full of people and no one gives a damn about who you are.

You are my son, all I have is faith in you that you are a good kid. Besides that, I don't know much about you. Same goes for your mother, sister, friends and everyone you have met. No one has any idea of who you are. No one really cares.

And that's why you get married. To have someone witness your life, to whom your presence or absence matters, who knows all about you and someone you can bet your life that no matter what happens, they will stand by you. She slowly replaces everyone else in your life.

A wife is (at times):

Your father: She's the one to discipline you when you go warily of your ways.
Your mother: She's the one to spoil you with love and care.
Sister: She's the one who has the right to fight with you and it's your responsibility to persuade her to make peace.
A teacher: She's the one who teaches you what you don't know.
A friend: She's the one you go on adventures with.
A lover: Well, that's captain obvious.
An enemy: She's the one who drives you mad and angry at times.
A daughter: She's the one you forgive no matter what.
You find a girl like that, bring her home.

Me: Dad, that's deep. Did you think all of that before you married mom?

Dad: Well at that age, you just want to marry a girl who you can wake up next to and feel happy for no reason at all. All this wisdom comes with age.

Accepting one’s flaws/past peacefully.

Helping each other progress.

Breaking stereotypes.

Loving imperfections.

Absence of judgments.

Letting one study, without disturbing.

Not just talking, but actions to prove.

Loving the same person till 80.

Letting go of small fights and admitting when you’re wrong.

Giving one their personal space and not being insecure. Love can't be forced after all.

True love is a combination of being wild, crazy and practical at a go! Well, you need maturity to do this!

You need to get the mindset of an above average person:

They don’t just dream big, they work really hard to achieve their dreams.

They are confident and believe in themselves.

They invest in themselves and make themselves better every day.

They are passionate, they do what they love and enjoy doing it.

They don’t blame/complain, instead, they focus on finding a solution.

They take a risk and do what is right not what is easy.

They don't quit when they fail, they learn from their mistakes and come back prepared and stronger.

A lot of folks believe jealousy is something you feel because of sex--because someone wants to have sex with your partner (or you think someone does) or because your partner wants to have sex with someone else (or you think they do).

The reality is that jealousy isn't about sex--jealousy is about insecurity. You're afraid that you'll lose something you have, or lose something you want to have.

We live in a society that tangles sex and love all up in a big knot. That's a social construct, not a fact of biology. We are told over and over, almost literally from the day we're born: if your partner wants sex with someone else, they don't love you! You can only love one person at a time! If your partner strays, you'll lose them! If your partner loves someone else, that means they don't love you! If your partner strays, you're not good enough!

And on top of all that, we are not taught how to be secure, we're not taught how to communicate, we're not taught how to advocate for our needs.

So you combine those two things--we are told to mix up sex and love and assume that a partner who wants sex or has feelings for someone else is about to leave us, and we're not taught to be secure--and you have a recipe for sexual jealousy.

But again, these things are cultural, not an innate part of being human. We aren't born with these attitudes. We learn them.

#1 - Ultimately, women are looking for friendship. Yes, they want romance, but at the day’s end, they want to know that they are married to someone who has their back like a friend does.

#2 - Love is a choice, not a feeling. We choose to love our husband/wife. The feelings follow and are important. If you rely on feelings to determine the love that you have for your spouse, you will indeed be confused.

#3 - Marriage is an adventure. Which means that you need to be creative and adventurous. Seek opportunities to have fun and enjoy life. Find out what your wife likes to do and do those things. Introduce her to things you like to do as well.

#4 - A marriage that gets into a rut, will have problems. Don’t get into a rut. Yes, that takes work. But anything worth it takes work.

#5 - Men need respect. Women need love. This is known as the Love and Respect Principle.

#6 - If you have children, and do not keep the marriage priority after the children leave, there will be no marriage.

#7 - The best gift you can give your children is a happy, thriving marriage.

#8 - Do not live outside of your means. Allowing finances to be an issue of conflict is really hard on a marriage. Determine together what the budget will be and stick to it. If you are the finance person - you pay the bills. If your wife is - let her. Think about it as teamwork, rather than your desires and her desires. Sometimes the adventure of living on a budget is fun and challenging.

#9 - Treat your wife as a precious gift - you will never regret it!

#10 - If divorce is not an option, then your marriage will be much much sweeter. If you give the impression that you have an out through divorce, there will always be stress and less honesty and less willingness to work it out.

succyblinks:
Op ehn, me sef I tire pass u
I went to the market with 4k the other day to get some baking things and I couldn't get up to half of what I needed with the money

I jus tire, any opportunity I get to leave this country God knows I'll grab it

lol,if you are tired,come join me in Ghana at least currently Ghana is far better than naija

(1)At some point, one of you is going to wonder,
“We’re so good together. Why don’t we date?”
And just like that, there’s romantic feelings in the mix and all the things that you initially did because you were friends can be interpreted in all the wrong ways by one person.

(2)Everyone thinks you are together or will end up together. your friends, family etc.the girl who has a crush on him and sees you in his Facebook photos, the boy who has a crush on you and sees him in your Facebook photo.

(3)You may get pushed aside once he gets a girlfriend. But what usually happens is you get to approve the girlfriend, so she tries to impress you.

(4)Some people make the assumption that you are siblings because you look alike.

(5)You cannot share some thoughts.

(6) When whispering a joke, people automatically think it's something flirty.

(7)You've screamed, “WE’RE JUST FRIENDS” in people's faces about as many times as you've taken a dump.

feel free to add yours.

Sexism.
Both men and women face sexism. But the type of sexism that women face is acknowledged by society. This is rarely the case with the sexism that boys and men face. For example:
If a man slaps his wife because she cheated on him, he is an abusive and a horrible person. If a woman does the same, she is a strong, independent woman that doesn’t take shit from anyone. She is even praised.

If I take my shirt off, and a group of girls stare and take a picture of me, then they are just girlish. If a woman takes her shirt off, and a group of boys stare and take a picture, they are seen as perverts.

If I am drunk and have sex with a sober woman, I am regarded as lucky. If I am sober and have sex with a drunk woman, I am labeled a rapist.

Responsibility, then more responsibility. Responsibility until you die like a responsible person.

A girl can be accompanied by a guy easily, all they have to do is ask a guy. But for a guy, it is a nightmare to get a girl if they are not committed.

Often the girls with a beautiful smile, pretty eyes or a sexy figure would end up getting higher scores than the hard working boys who slog for hours in the college library.

Why does socializing have to remain a distant dream for the millions of single guys out there?

let me drop my pen here, guys feel free to add yours

(1)We are NOT your ex. Don't treat us like we've done
something wrong.

(2)Not all guys are abusive

(3)We like picking where we eat sometimes too.

(4)If we are staring at you it doesn’t mean we wanna sleep with you. You look pretty and that’s it.

(5)We aren't going to sexually assault you if it's just you and me. Taking reasonable safety precautions are understandable but don't treat us like we're convicted sex offenders

(6)Yes, you do get on our nerves sometimes. But everyone else does too. If they don't annoy you at times do they truly love you?

(7)We get jealous of your ex. Don't talk about him and definitely don't compare us to him.

(We hate it when you make us choose between you and our friends. We may choose you but that's short term. We'll feel like a prisoner if we don't have freedom.

(9)We are not your slave. Quit treating us like a servant

(10)You look beautiful without makeup on. Seriously, we'd prefer you without makeup over you with makeup.

(11)Sex isn't a weapon. Quit treating it like one

(12)We want you to make the first move sometimes.

(13)Most of us don't mind stretch marks or acne. If guys focus on that then they're with you for the wrong reasons.

(14)We don't focus on your weight as closely as you think. If you ask us if it looks like you've gained weight and we reply something like "No baby of course not" then we are being honest. We don't watch your stomach to see if you've gained weight or lost weight.

(15) Nevertheless, there are guys who call you after you reach home late from office, not because they are flirting with you but because they care for your safety and your security.

(16)We have the power to understand whether your male best friend is trying to become your 2nd boyfriend (in case we happen to be the first)

(17)No, we do not think of sex every 7 seconds or whatever the myth is.

(18)We like it when u ask to split the bill (Even though we reject it till the end)

(19)We're not vastly more emotionally stable or less sad than you are, but we are a lot better at hiding it because that's what society expects of us

(20)There are guys who sacrifice their dreams, goals, and desires just to be together with you
.
(21)Not all guys really judge a girl on her beauty, there are guys who fall for her values. There are guys who tend to work hard in order to replace the tears of sadness with tears of happiness in the girl’s eye.

(22)Don't ever expect guys to take sides of their mother or their wife. Both are equally important. That single question of weighing the priorities between their mom and you breaks them apart.

(23)Guys love appreciation. Just how you girls like attention and compliment.

(24)That we are really dumb at 'picking up hints'. We aren't subtle, we are far from being subtle and have trouble comprehending all the subtlety.
So please, do your guy a favor and spell out, loud and clear, what you want to get across.

(25) Finally, we might have one thing in common(man hood) but it doesn't mean we are the same, so we ain't dogs like most of you regard us, we are human just like you.

I know I spoke for guys in general and all guys are different, but I can say that a lot of guys will agree with me.also, guys feel free to add yours.
thanks

Here are 7 signs that your partner doesn’t deserve you.

1. Your partner doesn’t challenge you.

Living in a partnership ideally, includes a coming together of mutual goals. If you challenge your partner to be a better person by accomplishing their goals, but your partner doesn’t support your dreams, it might be a sign that they don’t deserve you.

2. Your partner is a liar.

When you’ve lost the bond of trust that you had with your partner, it’s hard to get it back. Whether they said something untrue or they didn’t follow through on what they promised, your faith in them has changed. While it’s not impossible to get it back with time, losing trust could be a sign that your partner doesn’t deserve you.

3. You have to apologize for your partner’s behavior.

If you’ve ever been in a group of people whose mouths dropped open by something your partner said or did, you may have found yourself apologizing for your partner’s behavior. “I’m so sorry, s/he didn’t get enough sleep last night,” you say as you drag your other half away from the group. Apologizing for something that you didn’t do is never a good sign.

4. Your partner has a different outlook on what they want.

You’ve got big dreams, hopes, and aspirations for your future. Your partner isn’t sure where their next paycheck is coming from. When your partner has no desire to improve their situation in life, but you do, it may be a sign that your partner doesn’t deserve you.

5. You make the effort but your partner doesn’t.

If you find yourself planning all of the activities that you do together, your partner might not deserve all of the effort that you put in to the relationship. You remember birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays and already have the perfect party outfit and supplies ready for next Valentine’s day. Your partner asks “Don’t we have a thing this weekend?” as you roll your eyes at them and explain that yes, you are expecting them to attend your 10-year wedding anniversary dinner on Saturday at 5:00pm, promptly.

6. Your partner rejects your desire for intimacy.

Initiating sex is a very delicate balance. When one person approaches the other, there is tremendous potential for hurt and rejection. If one person suggests sex, and the other turns it down, this often leads to resentment and finally avoidance.

Your partner should treat you like a priority, and that includes respecting your need for intimacy. If your partner treats you like an option rather than a priority, it could be a sign that your partner doesn’t deserve you.

7. Your partner overlooks when you’re feeling down.

Your partner’s mood is upbeat, but you have a case of the blues that’s hard to shake. Pulling yourself up out of the hole of depression that you’ve fallen into is stressful to a relationship. It’s even more stressful for a couple when one partner disregards the feelings of the other.

A big difference in mood from one partner to another can make the happier one feel annoyed and resentful. The one who is suffering from depression feels like a burden. At a time when you most need them, aren’t around for you.

If your partner doesn’t deserve your time, it might be time to break ties with them and move on to someone who does.

How they decide if a man is attractive.

Put an attractive woman in front of a group of men.

Ask them to rate her on a scale of one to ten and I'll bet my shirt the answers are pretty close: 8,9,8,10,9,9,8.

Put an attractive man in front of a group of women. Good luck guessing the results: 7,2,10,1,10,1,8,3,9

My pet theory is that each woman has either -

A) a unique and highly complex equation in her head

OR

B) a random number generator

-that determines whether she finds a guy physically attractive.

But in reality I know there will always be a lot of 10-scale variances because attraction for women is often a deeper concept that includes making an intellectual and emotional connection, criteria men could probably use a bit more of in the selection process.

And I’m not usually a fan of highlighting/compounding sex differences but (I think) this is one area where men and women differ vastly.