₦airaland Forum

That guy with all these has not yet been born

casualobserver:
It sounds good in theory but if you did not experience a stable home with two parents, you have no reference point to build one yourself. Whatever we learn at home in our formative years is what we carry into the world. It is extremely hard to change dysfunction that has been built into one’s DNA.

We all have habits that we struggle with whose origins can be traced to our youth and upbringing. So for anyone to think you can just overcome family dysfunction is nothing but pure fantasy. It can be done but it takes constant consciousness and vigilance…most will not succeed. Very often those raised in dysfunction are not even aware of the dysfunction. Sometimes you want to over come but can’t because you have no reference point or experience of what it takes. This is why the cycle tends to continue.

A man is brought up in a home by a single mother he has no father reference figure. He has not seen what it takes for a man to have peace at home because he has not experienced the dynamics of 2 parents at close quarters. He starts a family and feels it is everything he has to comment on and does not have the knowledge that for peace you have to learn to see and not see because he has not seen his father have to do these things. A woman is brought up by a single mother, as the breadwinner the mother is naturally masculine and aggressive because she has to perform the masculine roles of a missing father, the daughter has never experienced a scenario where the mother is submissive to anyone or has trust in a man, she has never seen the dynamics of a man and a woman in a stable and peaceful home. How is she supposed to unlearn what she has been nurtured in her formative years and trust and depend on and be a partner to a husband? Children from broken homes are more likely to have broken homes themselves because painful as the experience may have been and determined as they may be to avoid it themselves…. You can’t give what you don’t have! especially these days that marriages are fragile. It is possible but the vast majority will repeat the cycle.

✔✔✔✔

For me, things became softer somehow...

This year, some ppl thought i could not. But i did, and wonderfully well too.

Shoodboi:
Is Nairaland now advertising fraud? The guy opened his profile about a week ago and even left his phone number on his profile. Deal with him at your peril.

You are far too wise

Ronu Dialect radio

Response to emergencies in Lagos is awesome

Taylor94:
Where una dey see Fvck sef




Every babe wey dey around me dey for period since two years ago

Budding teenager
Dont worry much. girls will begin to dash you their bum bum when u mature some more

Sniper101:
Mark my words, sire...

She'll either serve you divorce papers at some point or She'll turn you into the wife of the house if she eventually asks you both to come over or She'll actually switch up on you when things become "soft" for her over there.


NB: it's not like am wishing these on you though

It's a possibility.

Another hard one for japa ppl. Taking care of your baby should not be a problem. The main problem is do you trust your wife 100% to do the right things always when she gets there. I hope you get it ...😐

Calitoscassius:
Yea right! The resident qualified Nairaland doctor has spoken.. this is why so many Naigerians die outta ignorance.. i bet your bitterleaf cures cancer and kidney illnesses also, maybe even HIV, dementia, Migraine, heart diseases, cholera, blindness. Ashtma, tuberculosis. I tell you what! People should travel to Naigeria for medical treatments with bitterleaf, rather than Naigerians wasting millions of dollars seeking medical treatments in the UK and America.


Just eat bitterleaf!!

I tell you bro, it prevents more than half of what you wrote up there. It can even cure some of them too. It's the truth

emmanuelbrown26:
SO u are advicing people to stop taken chemotherapy? How stupid dis sounds is amazing

Oh i think your messed up eyes missed that part where antimalarials, antihypertensives and the likes were mentioned in the original post. That's what my post addressed.

Emmanuel, don't take out your frustrations on my innocent post. Nigeria is tough, yes! But you have got to be tougher. Your parents did a bad job on you. Go to them if they are still alive and take out your frustration on your stupid lots. Goat!

It's been over two years i took any medicine drug aside paracetamol and piriton which i take sparingly. People still don't know the usefulness of bitterleaf and scent leaf juice.

Get the leaves wash them thoroughly, extract their juices and drink every now and then. It does everything healthwise, i mean everything.

abbeyd2:
I have somebody of your age she's 56 now, She narrated the story of her life to me.

It ended this way "IF I COULD TURN BACK THE HAND OF TIME" she would have amended her way.

Because there's time for everything. Very soon no man will look on your side except shop and go.

Yes. OP failed to realize that indeed there is time for everything.

At 42! Well,its not too late

IELTS

LeoDeKing:
Olumba Olumba, Cele, Seraphim & Cherubim and other spiritual churches, I see them as spiritualists and kinda organised witchcraft operating under the cover of religion.

Please, I don't mean to offend members of these churches, just a personal perception.

And I never knew igbos cab be members of these types of churches.

A useless frog made this comment up 👆here

..

I miss this tiger. I miss it's sounds. A little tap on the gas pedal & it will roar like a beast.

lashout1:
You really do not know what your life pattern have been saving you from.

Exactly!

pansophist:
Most people's lives suck, not just you.

Just like no matter how hot water is, it will revert back to its default temperature, which is lukewarm. Human life is like that. Those that you think their life does not suck are just in a state of a boil, so the distraction kind of entertains them away to not reflecting on the fact that life sucks and they need help.

You havent engaged in that exercise, so you think there is some reward there. If you start having friends, going out, and engaging in more activities, you will see the challenges there, and you will have scars, that your solitude will later become your preferred state of being.

So you will be betrayed, maybe be introduced to money-draining addiction (eg gambling), heartbroken, nonreciprocal efforts, envy, users, waste money chasing the wind, maybe try to impress people that on a good day, want to stab you, etc.

Introverts are usually people who understand all these and just prefer not to engage much with the world because it's just more problem than it's worth. So-called extroverts are those who when they even need help, all their friends will give them the middle finger. So how are they better?

So, my guy, you are in a state of unspoiled. The only disadvantage here is that it may be boring, just like wealthy neighborhoods are dry and boring, but it's just a good way to live, otherwise, is to become rugged to your own detriment, and still return to the same place you started from.

Then boredom becomes peace, a place you will arrive at after you have been through the boil.

Clap !
Clap !!
Clap !!!

Bravo. Agba Nairalander. Nice write up

Peledonomy:
Let me go first.
1. Know your limits
2. Look before you leap
3. Some opportunities are traps
4. You must not win all fights
5. Stay in your area of strength


Add yours.

Quora things

A good phone. An iPhone preferably.

..

Around 6 p.m. four days ago, I was on my way to church, dressed in my white garment and walking briskly along a narrow footpath. I unexpectedly bumped into a man coming from the opposite direction. He was dressed in all black or navy blue; I couldn't tell the exact color because it was getting dark. We walked past each other on the narrow path, and we had to bend a little for each other to pass without brushing our shoulders or chests. I hope you understand.

When I was returning from church, sometime after 7 p.m., I took the same narrow path I'd used earlier. To my surprise, I bumped into the same man at the exact spot where we had walked past each other before. Again, we had to bend slightly to avoid bumping into each other.

It’s fascinating that this event repeated itself in just a span of about an hour. This is the first time I've experienced such a phenomenon. What are the chances of encountering someone at the same spot again? The universe is truly wonderful.

Do you think the universe is trying to convey a message or simply offering a subtle greeting?

Have you ever experienced this or any other kind of synchronicity?

Just sad

What consumes fuel in a car? ...hmmmmm that should be engine.
Period.

Just sad! I have learned a thing or two here.

Lesson for African men:

if you grow up to become an adult in africa, then abroad is just for vacation or work, nothing more. If you must relocate with your family, then as a man, you must be the breadwinner.

[quote author=MSN1 post=]... I stopped immediately I knew that nobody was interested in hearing my rubbish[/quote]That's right rubiiish 😏

So you expect OP to spill the whole truth here...hmm

This OP's story is touchy sha

MSN1:
Thanks Oga quota.
Too many children on this platform, Quota I don't even know anything about.
Everything and more I wrote here were from my head.
Bros. Take ur pen and come for schooling, don't allow Time to teach u, trust me; not everyone can survive after Time teaches them.
____Read my reply to the person u quoted.
Alhamdulilah.

Lol its called QUORA and not quota, daft head . Liar, Go back to quora and read some more. No hard feelings son.

Mamadf:
Thanks, I told him to be sending up keep money even if na 2k monthly to her and occasionally talk to her phone or at a public space but he refuses,this man always abuses and over do things. He wants something else but God will not allow him.

Ofcourse he would refuse such arrangement from you. It's only the court that can enforce such. Even the court maybe more linient and grant shared custody between you and her real father. These are some of the consequences of your past that you have to live with.