₦airaland Forum

hmmmm

bidemi12:
@OJD. I saw your footnote ''proud to be Nigerian, are you?''. Well all i can say is if you are a Nigerian living in Nigeria definitely you will be proud to be one. But if you are a Nigerian living in the united states or any civilised and organised country where everything functions, trust me you will not. Even Somalians make fun of us. Can you imagine, sea pirates. Kai i don suffer

Mehn, I am [i]VERY PROUD [/i]to be called a Nigerian both in the UK and the US. I infact flaunt being a Nigerian. I make sure my accent shows and no one will mistake me!

Criminal Nigerians or not, I am proud of my roots. I can't suddenly become Afro American. I know where I am from!

[quote author=frank3.16 link=topic=321588.msg4515561#msg4515561 date=1252571004]i am sure your boobs are tastless[/quote]do u want to taste, be a man just tell her you want some

Source please?

Saw this somewhere, it might be old and its a joke but its still true!

MEN OH MEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In the world of romance, one single rule applies to the Men:
Make the man happy.
Do something he likes, and you get points,
Do something he dislikes and points are subtracted.
You don't get any points for doing something he expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Here is a guide to the point system:


SIMPLE DUTIES



1. You make the bed (0)
2. You prepare his meals (0) after a hard day at work (0) and its not tasty(-10)
3. You clean the house (0) you clean the house after a hard day’s work (0)
4. You go out to buy him what he wants (+5) in the rain (+ But return without change (-5)
5. You do his laundry (0) and a stain doesn’t come off (-5)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

1. You stay by his side the entire party (0)
2. You stay by his side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)
3. Named Emeka (-4)
4. Emeka is a SHELL staff(-6)
5. Emeka is single and is really handsome (-80)


His BIRTHDAY



1. You forget his birthday (-500)
2. You take him out to dinner (+50)
3. You take him out to dinner and it's Mr. Biggs (+1)
4. you take him to a Chinese restaurant (+2)
5. You take him to O' Jez (+3)
6. You take him to an Nkwobi joint (+10)


A NIGHT OUT



1. You take him to a movie (-10)
2. You go with him to a movie he likes (+2)
3. You go with him to a movie you hate (+3)

YOUR PHYSIQUE



1. You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
2. You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
3. You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)
4. You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)

COMMUNICATION



1. When he wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression (0)
2. You listen and tell him he was wrong(-100)
3. You listen for more than 30 minutes (+50)
4. You tell him he was right even when he was dead wrong (+1000)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAH





Now ladies what chance do you really have hmm, ?

Some science mehn. Nominate you for the Nobel Boobs Price

richcookie:
I have been in Yankee for over 27 yrs and I am not suprised any more. Most Nigerians think this is back home. Some believe bribery, voodoo will help them when caught. The american law enforcement is very good at catching people. In america everything you do leaves a paper trail. The punishment for this kind of crime just got very severe. The defendents should do at least 5 to 10 yrs and then automatically deported unless a citizen.
    The Secret service, which is responsible for guiding the president, is also in charge of  printing fake money fraud, credit card fraud and identity theft when used to apply for credit card. I can tell you from experience, the secret service has many Nigerian agents that speak all dialects. The Nigerian agents will blend in and identify known culprits by sometimes participating in the crime.
   Personally, I try not to blame anyone in regards to how you earn your dough, but try to use common sense. I have friends that did not know when to quit and now serving hard times in prison. "Oyinbo" man is the worst crook of all. Just imagine how they colonized africa with the bible, enslaved us, slaughtered hundreds of millions of our fore fathers and continue to still rule Africa by remote control.
    To most of you that shout Nigerians are crooks in America, you have no idea what you're talking about. All ethnic groups do crime:

chinese and Koreans ( into smuggling fake goods, money laundering, drug trafficking, human trafficking, contract killings etc

Italians ( real organized thieves, union thuggery, fake credit cards manufacturers, best contract killers, truck hijacking, major drug smugglers, loan sharks, mortgage fraud

Irish groups (Political crooks, govt. control, have support in most law enforcement groups, smuggling, contract killers, industry hijackers, remote control of whole countries, major major dope smugglers, best currency counterfeiters

Jamaicans: (known killers,  drug smugglers, human traffickers, home invasion crooks

Mexicans: ( vicious contract killers, large quantity drug smugglers, major money launderers, political thuggery

Colombians: ( known contract killers (usually all family members), major drug distributors, money launderers, weapons distributors

Europeans: ( best bribe givers, control of major countries by remote control, best secret societies, best mental science practitioners ( also called voodoo), wholesale killings, best marketers of killing devices, run most African countries including Nigeria by remote control, very efficient contract killers

Do you need more? So please stop complaining about Nigerians and crime. Our only fault is not committing crimes to help our people progress like the europeans and chinese do. Our leaders are busy begging for aid, forgetting that a blessed country in natural resources like Nigeria should not beg but have a plan to spy, steal and copy technologies to move our  nation forward.

Nice one. The Jews too. They own half of the world. Control everything. Run everything. Make most things happen

I think Naija crooks have not fine tuned there criminalty to a science. All they do is the brazen crude s**T. We do not necessarily seek the betterment of the country called Nigeria. After stealing all these money, you bet none of the guys would have opened a factory as the Indian would have done in his country. I do not support any form of scam. But as you have pointed out. We are not the worst criminals, sometimes we are just the loudest mealy mouths. We talk too much, brag too much, too decentralized.
Very few Hispanics would talk when caught, very few Italians would too.

In the end, I think we should concentrate on the legal means of doing things, we are not good at being crooks.

The manhas stolen Nigeria's money. He wants to now use it to lunch himself into the political class.

Well done Chukwuma! A true son of Nigeria!


I hope the people in Anambra are more responsible. Even if they cannot do the work of EFCC, they should at least resist him.

Peace

Give him all your money

Or better still there is one babalawo my wife used for me, he never fails. Just put the designer love potion in your perfume or scan and attach to the email Just see the wonders. Just send me the details of the man. Please include your credit card number. Babalawo doesn't collect money again.

Seriously, don't try to make a man fall in love with you. We tend to use, if you think you must, seduce subtly. As predators we go for a weakness and exploit it!

dangiwa09:
Abeg, na wetin we go do to our yoruba brothers and this their apetite for credit card fraud. This thing is painting us bad o!

http://naijanet.com/news/source/2009/sep/9/1000.html

I hate to see stupid posts like these. Its not only the Yoruba people that are engaged in frauds. Its all of us.

These names on these websites sure doesn't look Yoruba to me
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/metropolitan/6603718.html
http://www.atmasphere.net/wp/archives/2003/07/26/houston-residents-indicted-in-nigerian-e-mail-scam

Fraud in Nigeria is not limited to any one ethnic group. Is your state governor not corrupt? Is your LGA chairman not a thieving politician, are the commissioners not thieves.

Please check your facts and kept back to me ASAP before I vex too much

classic

Live with it, enjoy it. Don't think of it.

Dwelling on it leads to problems. Try to make your own stash, remember though its not a competition

Peace

when you wanna scare your kids, say IBB
when you want to write the history of failures in Nigeria IBB

the killer of many. soldiers on training, killer of Gideon Orkar the April 22 coup plotter, killer of his 'best' friend, his best man and colleague, Mamman Vatsa, killer of Dele Giwa, killer of the country

Killer of Democracy,

Kleptogeneral

You bet my hate for him is plenty.

As the man above said, we talk too much. I wish I could pop him. I'll probably if I ever see him on the streets

HeinmanNig:
Are moderators allowed to do that . I made a posting in the tech market section this afternoon for some items for sale (which is what the tech market section is for) .

I tried a few times to post but the post kept not showing up. I though maybe it was an error because it has happened a while ago in the past and I attributed it to database error or something. I left it for a while, when to grab something to eat, then came back, and suddenly I cant log in and my username (Hynman) no longer exists

Do some of us have to foloow some special procedures to do what everyone else is doing. So far as I know, I didnt/haven't broken any rules?

Mail the admin for tech, will that work?

dangiwa09:
Abeg, na wetin we go do to our yoruba brothers and this their apetite for credit card fraud. This thing is painting us bad o!

http://naijanet.com/news/source/2009/sep/9/1000.html

I hate to see stupid posts like these. Its not only the Yoruba people that are engaged in frauds. Its all of us.

These names on these websites sure doesn't look Yoruba to me
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/metropolitan/6603718.html
http://www.atmasphere.net/wp/archives/2003/07/26/houston-residents-indicted-in-nigerian-e-mail-scam

Fraud in Nigeria is not limited to any one ethnic group. Is your state governor not corrupt? Is your LGA chairman not a thieving politician, are the commissioners not thieves.

Please check your facts and kept back to me ASAP before I vex too much

steve mike:
Spikecylinder you are a fool, you lack understanding, that is your problem

Steve Mike, take it easy on your blood pressure!!

dangiwa09:
Abeg, na wetin we go do to our yoruba brothers and this their apetite for credit card fraud. This thing is painting us bad o!

http://naijanet.com/news/source/2009/sep/9/1000.html

I hate to see stupid posts like these. Its not only the Yoruba people that are engaged in frauds. Its all of us.

These names on these websites sure doesn't look Yoruba to me
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/metropolitan/6603718.html
http://www.atmasphere.net/wp/archives/2003/07/26/houston-residents-indicted-in-nigerian-e-mail-scam

Fraud in Nigeria is not limited to any one ethnic group. Is your state governor not corrupt? Is your LGA chairman not a thieving politician, are the commissioners not thieves.

Please check your facts and kept back to me ASAP before I vex too much

davidylan:
this is rubbish, plagiarized directly from Exodus 33. Its amazing that the only people priviledged to see "god" have ALL BEEN JEWS FROM THE BIBLE!

Good observation considering Mohammed didn't get his 'revelations' some 2-3 thousand after Moses 'wrote' the books

Forgotten my Sunday school lessons

Pweety4me:
Hehe wat's d matter mr? [/color][color=#990000][color=#990000][/color]

I have had too much to drink and its just 3 pm. Feeling queasy

Oh, my bad thought it was part of the game!

Grays College
Imperial College
UT @ Austin

Abuzola:
Quran 4:171

'O people of the scripture (christians) ! Do not exceed the limits in your religion nor say of God aught but the truth. The messiah, jesus son of Mary was no more than a messenger of God ,,,,, say not 'trinity' stop it ! It is better for you . For God is only one God, glorified is He, far exalted is He above having a son. To Him belongs all that is in the heavens and all that is in the earth. And God is All sufficient as a Disposer of affairs'

Mullah Abuzola, please is there hope for Atheists with no religion. Especially those who think Allah is a cruel god and do no think he can act as any disposer since he doesn't exist?

No preference

Egusi with Pounded yam

2 day old Ogbono with Starch, Eba

fellis:
Quran 7:143 ;
'And when Moses arrived at Our appointed time and his Lord spoke to him, he said, "My Lord, show me (Yourself) that I may look at You." (Allah) said, "You will not see Me, but look at the mountain; if it should remain in place, then you will see Me." . But when his Lord appeared to the mountain, He rendered it level, and Moses fell unconscious, "Exalted are You! i have repented to You and I am the first of the believers."
Allah is too great to be behelded with your human eyes. That you cannot see him the way people see the idols they worship does not mean He is not the true God.
And there are different signs of Allah, it is not just the crescent and star. Some of them are the night and the day and the sun and the moon (Surah 41:37).

looks like a page from Grimm's brothers

He's right. It was the fans' fault. Fans like me who were born Nigerian.

The problem is these guys don't have the motivation, drive and predatory hunger to excel again or go for glor. They are like big fat overbloated agric fowl, satisfied with the money they are making in Europe.

God go punish that im mouth wey e take talk am.

Oloshi, ode, alakori, nonsense and ingredient.

I hiss in bakongo

same thing Houston. You get stopped sometime by the Police for nothing but the car you drive when they see you look black (as opposed to Afro American) and you drive a fly car. they got the feeling you must be making some money by the side illegally

its annoying and shameful at the same time

can't we just not be fraudulent (question is rhetorical - its a reflection of our f**ked up Dear Country and thieving leadership!)

Gadaaamit


[color=Black]SEe MaP!!![/color]


God, this is the one of the funniest s**tty thread I have seen in a while

becomrich is a certified lunatic

that guy no no imself


If possible fans should just ignore him

I hope one day I see him on the streetz, I'm gonna pop him
b***ch a**