daclemx:




If you dont want him...stand your ground....If they say they won't help you, forget about them....God will always provide a helper...Lucky you, you are about to finish your school...so, stand your ground....There are things you can do to make money and help yourself legally....Eloho...Urhobo right? Mavo?

Omame gare, Migwo

linearity:


When dem go act the part 2 of this cock and bull movie self?

You are 19 years old and in your final year? Or you meant final year for secondary school and your parents dey force you to marry for secondary?

What do you mean?,that you graduated at the age of 35 does not mean others must be like you.
This is the 22nd century, ppl graduate at 19,20,21,22yrs.
As a matter of fact I have a sibling who graduated this year and is just 19years

Your story and mine are almost the same. My dear, it's really hard and frustrating. I'm doing what makes me happy and I'm enjoying it...it's only possible cos I'm really far away from home now and not as young as you.

Toniaeloho:
A man in his late twenties approached me to marry him. I was not attracted to him neither was he a very friendly person. I told my mom about it and she advised me to think about it carefully.

After much thought, I decided to refuse because he seemed in hurry to marry me even when he barely knew me.

My parents got so angry with me. They said I should say agree because he is God fearing, has a good job( he owns a school) and they like him. I still refused , the man told me to marry him because he likes me and my parents like him. I tried reasoning with him but he told me that in those days girls marry men their parents approve.

My parents have threatened to not support my schooling if I refuse. I have tried to love this guy but I just can't. My parents esp my mom like him too much. I am not allowed to say a bad word against him. I am in my final year at school and 19 year old.

What should I do?

There's nothing like love in marriage. Its just tolerance and cooperation that's all. However I believe you are too young to tie the knots. Tell your parents that you'll marry at 22 and if the man can wait you will accept him then.

Eleyi gidi gannnnnn

Hmmm....at 19?... in 2016?... being forced into marriage?.... I think you have already told your mom about your decision... say no more to her. Tell the guy you are not in favour... and if you are forced... he would regret it since you are giving him fair warning... that you would never be loyal to him... nor would he ever know peace.. and you are 99.9% sure that he shall not be the father of any of your children...if he rapes you.. you will abort...that is... if you show up for the wedding.

uzoexcel:
U would give u daughter out for marriage @ 19?
ridiculous

yes beta than giving her out @49

Toniaeloho:

Omame gare, Migwo

Sis please don't marry someone you're not attracted to cos you're going to regret it later in life. It's your life and not you parent's. Just look for one or two things to start doing.
And that man seems to be authoritative type with his statement ''those days girls marry men their parents approved of''

Personally to me. I think @ 19 you're still young to be rushing into marriage. Make your decision wisely

The way you people of this generation see love is different from the way our fathers saw it, you guys want to physically attracted to the man, you dont have to be in lust before you love someone,I was gonna really explain it's not even worth it among this nairalanders, this is why Christ said the children of this generation are "wiser"(educated/indoctrinated) than the children of the Light

Toniaeloho:

this is my first time on nairaland , I joined because I desperately needed advise.

windeal:
This girl op can never be 19years I repeat this girl in question is not 19years ..Nigerian girls will never seize to be 19/20 years old even though they are at their late 30s. gone are those days when parents chooses for their son/daughters who to marry and who not to marry ..unless age, tribe ,job Issues

Lol I found this very funny. You don't have to believe me. So all Nigerian girls are in their late 30s. It seems girls have lied to you too much

Well, Best u marry ur parents.

No matter what your parents say about it, don't marry him except if u love him, it's not their decision, it's yours and yours only, I must tell u have selfish and inconsiderate parents

tee59:
I know ur parents are igbo who lik money dan anytn.. Money is d only language dis igbo women understand, dat is why dey encourage their toddlers to get married to rich dudes wtout considering their happiness and joy. Igbo people and money, only God can separate dem. I kno d guy must be rich.

seems your myopic nature didnt see eloho?

Have been in this kind of situation before.... it's really frustrating but just stand your ground manage yourself when they see that your mind is made up they will stop..if possible stop calling them for a while, wen they don't hear from you for longthlong they will call you and reason with you

automatix:
hahahaha... i wanted to ask. Yeah, Igbos still do that till date. Arrangy marriage lol.

Arranged marriages yet Igbo's have the most successful marriages in Nigeria. If that's the case then arranged marriage is the best!

Mean while the op is not Igbo but as usual, some people have started showcasing their obsession with the great Igbo nation.

@op, what an elder sees while sitting, a child can not see even while standing on an iroko tree. Your parents might have cogent reasons for wanting you married to this guy. Better listen to them. All these special advisers here will not be there to help you when the chips are down.

Raatataataatataataa!!! Daz how the thunder dah'll fire your parents will sound like

ThonieNwako:
Have been in this kind of situation before.... it's really frustrating but just stand your ground manage yourself when they see that your mind is made up they will stop..if possible stop calling them for a while, wen they don't hear from you for longthlong they will call you and reason with you

Haabaa she shudd disparents her parents ni??

Toniaeloho:
A man in his late twenties approached me to marry him. I was not attracted to him neither was he a very friendly person. I told my mom about it and she advised me to think about it carefully.

After much thought, I decided to refuse because he seemed in hurry to marry me even when he barely knew me.

My parents got so angry with me. They said I should say agree because he is God fearing, has a good job( he owns a school) and they like him. I still refused , the man told me to marry him because he likes me and my parents like him. I tried reasoning with him but he told me that in those days girls marry men their parents approve.

My parents have threatened to not support my schooling if I refuse. I have tried to love this guy but I just can't. My parents esp my mom like him too much. I am not allowed to say a bad word against him. I am in my final year at school and 19 year old.

What should I do?

Some parents need public flogging.

They don't care about what their daughter feels, they forget she'd be the one living with the man and not them.

They are just laser focused on the guy's achievements and money. They just don't care about their daughter's safety.

They don't even know if the man will end up killing their daughter for money rituals.

Some parents ain't worthy to have kids.

U ve come to d rite plc? Pls note 30post n weigh d advise for u nt to marry him in quote n chart sheet?

Ur mum is so blind wit material tins?

Take d case to her own pastor alone first bfor dey invite ur parent

Masonic:


her parents must have a reason for this.


OP, are you fat? Ugly? Deformed? Single mom?
Are your parents broke? There has to be a rationale behind this. There's a reason your folks are insisting on you getting married so soon and to someone you don't like. You might wanna find out.

or she could be one of those loose girls jumping from one guy to another.

her parent may be trying to avoid unwanted pregnancy in their home

ameezy:

Why u put blank picture

I'm not a fan of putting profile pictures of me on forums e.g NL.

Rone16:


I'm not a fan of putting profile pictures of me on forums e.g NL.

Ok girlie

Toniaeloho:
A man in his late twenties approached me to marry him. I was not attracted to him neither was he a very friendly person. I told my mom about it and she advised me to think about it carefully.

After much thought, I decided to refuse because he seemed in hurry to marry me even when he barely knew me.

My parents got so angry with me. They said I should say agree because he is God fearing, has a good job( he owns a school) and they like him. I still refused , the man told me to marry him because he likes me and my parents like him. I tried reasoning with him but he told me that in those days girls marry men their parents approve.

My parents have threatened to not support my schooling if I refuse. I have tried to love this guy but I just can't. My parents esp my mom like him too much. I am not allowed to say a bad word against him. I am in my final year at school and 19 year old.

What should I do?

Just 19 . What sort of parents are those ? You shouldn't even be thinking of marriage now. If you marry now, it could slow you down.
I think you should present your case to someone your parents would listen to. Do you have an elderly uncle, aunt or a mutual pastor ?

Toniaeloho:
A man in his late twenties approached me to marry him. I was not attracted to him neither was he a very friendly person. I told my mom about it and she advised me to think about it carefully.

After much thought, I decided to refuse because he seemed in hurry to marry me even when he barely knew me.

My parents got so angry with me. They said I should say agree because he is God fearing, has a good job( he owns a school) and they like him. I still refused , the man told me to marry him because he likes me and my parents like him. I tried reasoning with him but he told me that in those days girls marry men their parents approve.

My parents have threatened to not support my schooling if I refuse. I have tried to love this guy but I just can't. My parents esp my mom like him too much. I am not allowed to say a bad word against him. I am in my final year at school and 19 year old.

What should I do?

I don't think the way people think anyway. But you do have sex with a boyfriend whom you love and don't even know if you will end up together. Why not get married and have sex legally?

NO TOO MUCH TALK BRING THE GUY'S no AND LEMME FIX HIM WITH A WORKING CLASS AND WELL TO DO INDEPENDENT LADY @24, SO HE CAN LEAVE YOU ALONE, don't come here after 5years complaining,.

why not play along with ur parents and d guy, finish your education, further a bit and if he still fancies u den hit It off, if he is matured he wud see d clear picture, before you r thru, u wud b hitting mid 20s

Toniaeloho:
A man in his late twenties approached me to marry him. I was not attracted to him neither was he a very friendly person. I told my mom about it and she advised me to think about it carefully.

After much thought, I decided to refuse because he seemed in hurry to marry me even when he barely knew me.

My parents got so angry with me. They said I should say agree because he is God fearing, has a good job( he owns a school) and they like him. I still refused , the man told me to marry him because he likes me and my parents like him. I tried reasoning with him but he told me that in those days girls marry men their parents approve.

My parents have threatened to not support my schooling if I refuse. I have tried to love this guy but I just can't. My parents esp my mom like him too much. I am not allowed to say a bad word against him. I am in my final year at school and 19 year old.

What should I do?

Your story is totally un-true. You just have to quiet. So many fake stories on this social media.

my neighbor, She is just 21, her mom is on her neck to get a husband. Some mothers sha, smh

money don enter ur parents eye

Toniaeloho:

this is my first time on nairaland , I joined because I desperately needed advise.

I still smell bad gang lie, because my first day on NL I didn't know how to quote, but you sounding like a pro, and even quoting me.but never mind, Ogun is still watching you

Naijaboiy1:
19 years?

What sort of parents do you have?

so dem follow ban u seff. Lwkmd

Lexusgs430:


Did your Mum marry your Dad due to pressure from her parents?
Give her all the scenarios why her choice, cannot be yours.
If she refuses, don't worry abscond, I would marry you......

I feel this ur comment jare....especially the absconding part, u sure know how to calm nerves....