pocohantas:


I don't like fight.
When girls say, guys shouldn't date without money...they flare up. But they say girls shouldn't date if they don't want to have sex.
That's arrant rubbish coming from both sides, relationship is way beyond sex and money, if at all it is present...it should be mutual.

If a girl looks you in the eye and tells you, she can't date you without money, will you find it funny? You'll probably run to NL to create a thread and they'll jump on it like monkeys to call her olosho.

No one should make his sexual preference a standard. Do your own, let others do their own.

What pains me most is, create another thread now...saying Nigerian girls are lose. These same hypocrites would be there to judge.

You seems to be missing the point here, honestly.

what the Op is saying is simple plain black and white

You cannot have a romantic affair without sex or money in a relationship unless the parties involve have stated in clear terms the direction in which the relationship is heading.

The key point is to have him / her understand your actions and the reason behind them. But with most men, if they’re investing in a woman sex tends to be expected same for women too

Rapmoney:
Sex is a human act. Abstaining from it does not define a real man.

a human act subject to human. a real man dat loves his girl will wait or do d needful if he finds himself in dis situation. I doubt all men wud want to let go. I rather say the guy shud leave if he can't control his john Thomas.

Skubidude:


And u think she wud tell u she is wide and all the guys she has been with? Either u are naive or just acting dumb.
Now lemme ask u one question. What if u are in this no sex relationship spending ur hard earn money only for you to discover she is been having sex with some other guys all the while u've been answerinng Mr. Nice Guy, what would u do

That is her lot! it is quite painful , in fact very painful. But i will be glad i played my part as a good guy who respected her opinion. Then i could say she is not loyal or whatever. Abi? what difference does it make if i shag her and she still goes around sleeping with other guys? like i have been saying, what is good for the goose is good for the gander. If i like and want sex so much , i will find a partner who does same too. 4/2. equal equal. Our mindset is always to feck every girl we come across. feck! feck!! feck!!! so much energy chasing fecks up and down. If you have to feck your girl, let it be mutual. If she doesn't agree you can call the relationship off and move unto the one that will give u what you want.( you can see i am not trying to be sentimental here, i am just being truthful)
It is not like girls also don't have responsibilities or things they should adhere to. Example is loyalty. If she uses u as Mugu 14 and gets actions outside then whatever you want to do is left to you(Another topic for another day).

Just had to go through the OP's post for the second time(Just to be sure) and the comments,esp from the first page,that i'm reading are totally different from what the OP is talking about....Is it that most of those who rushed to comment didnt understand the write up?

Ifedith:

I don't know why you're taking this simple topic and making it complicated. Jesus says, if your left hand will cause you to sin,cut it off, simple solution. This guy just gave a simple solution to girls who don't want sex but want to be in a romantic relationship, the solution was simple,stay away till you're ready to have sex, if you can't stand the heat, stay away from the kitchen. Simple! Why are you making it difficult?

Exactly...and i think the OP is actually talking about compatibility here....If U want to have sex when U are married,then seek for such Ur kind of person in Ur life....Its wrong to go asking for a romantic relationship as if the person doesn't understand what it entails....

Naija girls would be draining a dude like lightning n b forming no sex b4 marriage. If we get home today.. .. .. .

Jodha:
Bingos will always bark...

Dry nairaland bingos..

See as you dry like crayfish, what do you hv to offer with your breastless and assless body..

I think most of those commenting against Op's post are seriously having comprehension issues......
There are clearly "different kinds of relationships"...
Before U enter any,ensure that U have "defined" that Relationship to avoid having difficulties with Ur partner in the future....
"Romantic" relationships involves s.ex....If U dont want s.ex during a relationship,then dont go into a romantic relationship..
....from the start,make it clear to Ur partner about the kind of relationship U want.....
If Ur partner agrees,Fine...
If not,then go Ur separate ways..
..Be in a relationship with someone who shares Ur moral or spiritual values...finito!!

christm386:

pls this topic is not 4 u, u re too ugly for God's sake, even if I been wan sex ur face go kill the urge within milliseconds, I am sure ur boyfriend(which I doubt that u have of course who will be that stupid to date u) will be the one begging for no sex until break up, keep ur smelling pussy to urself, ugly afonja

been reading the comments n i wasn't intending to comment meself till i read yours.
.
.
i know u think u're being funny with dt kinda comment but bro, dt was so uncalled for.

@topic, it's a matter of choice na. op, u have absolutely no right to tell ladies to stay off rxns just cause of sex, dt is hogwash. If u know u can't love a gal without sexual intimacy, let her know n take a walk b4 things get 2 serious...leave d 'no sex girls' alone

HannahHitler:
If you desire sex so much then put a ring on it. No. you don't want to put a ring on it, you don't like good girls with principles, you run after those ones that use sex as a bargaining tool and then come back here crying of heart break and your girlfriend liking money too much. Niccur gerrarahia.

u girls just come online and say rubbish...until u tell urself d truth things will continue to get worse....do u know how many girls here dat have offered themselves up for sex because of phone not dat they were interested in rings on their fingers or marriage.....sometimes I just see a pathetic society.....

franugo:


been reading the comments n i wasn't intending to comment meself till i read yours.
.
.
i know u think u're being funny with dt kinda comment but bro, dt was so uncalled for.

@topic, it's a matter of choice na. op, u have absolutely no right to tell ladies to stay off rxns just cause of sex, dt is hogwash. If u know u can't love a gal without sexual intimacy, let her know n take a walk b4 things get 2 serious...leave d 'no sex girls' alone

do u know u concluded by saying nonsense....so a girl can not open up and tell a guy d kind of relationship she wants so dat d guy too will decide d next step.? I hope she won't complain when d guy refuses to give money or gifts too...

franugo:


been reading the comments n i wasn't intending to comment meself till i read yours.
.
.
i know u think u're being funny with dt kinda comment but bro, dt was so uncalled for.

@topic, it's a matter of choice na. op, u have absolutely no right to tell ladies to stay off rxns just cause of sex, dt is hogwash. If u know u can't love a gal without sexual intimacy, let her know n take a walk b4 things get 2 serious...leave d 'no sex girls' alone

by openmine ( m ): 4:36am
I think most of those commenting are
seriously having comprehension
issues......
There are clearly "different kinds of
relationships"...
Before U enter any,ensure that U
have "defined" that Relationship to
avoid having difficulties with Ur
partner in the future....
"Romantic" relationships involves
s.ex....If U dont want s.ex during a
relationship,then dont go into a
romantic relationship..
....from the start,make it clear to Ur
partner about the kind of relationship
U want.....
If Ur partner agrees,Fine...
If not,then go Ur separate ways..
..Be in a relationship with someone
who shares Ur moral or spiritual
values...finito!!





.,...... ....................................................this is d type of advice I expected from u

Fourwinds:
do u know u concluded by saying nonsense....so a girl can not open up and tell a guy d kind of relationship she wants so dat d guy too will decide d next step.? I hope she won't complain when d guy refuses to give money of gifts too...

Oga it's a rxn, nt a military regime. the couple should be able to talk about such things...if d guy cannot love without sex, then he should let d gal know n d gal would tell him if she is d 'no sex' kind or nt...if d couple cannot talk abt these things, then make them kukuma break up cause dt ain't no rxn.

I have never seen it written down anywhere that it is a law for a lady to have sex with her bf in a relationship so this is a very sexist article. I don't understand why you should demand for such as if it's your right and it actually isn't but a matter of choice. Sex generally means more to women than men so that is why some ladies want deeper commitment before engaging in it. The society these days has made it become normal for guys to think it is their right when they are not even married to you. No one forced you to date her or buy things for her in d first place. Not that am condemning girls that do it but it is strictly a matter of choice and not coercion or giving an ultimatum for relationship.

franugo:


Oga it's a rxn, nt a military regime. the couple should be able to talk about such things...if d guy cannot love without sex, then he should let d gal know n d gal would tell him if she is d 'no sex' kind or nt...if d couple cannot talk abt these things, then make them kukuma break up cause dt ain't no rxn.

so what u wrote and what isaid earlier., what is d difference.?

evansjeff:
Who sent Nairaland to start posting signatures under comments? Is that the upgrade we need? Mmmtttccchhheeeww....

na today e start? e dy like dt since na

Fourwinds:







by openmine ( m ): 4:36am
I think most of those commenting are
seriously having comprehension
issues......
There are clearly "different kinds of
relationships"...
Before U enter any,ensure that U
have "defined" that Relationship to
avoid having difficulties with Ur
partner in the future....
"Romantic" relationships involves
s.ex....If U dont want s.ex during a
relationship,then dont go into a
romantic relationship..
....from the start,make it clear to Ur
partner about the kind of relationship
U want.....
If Ur partner agrees,Fine...
If not,then go Ur separate ways..
..Be in a relationship with someone
who shares Ur moral or spiritual
values...finito!!





.,...... ....................................................this is d type of advice I expected from u

Oga we r basically saying d same thing, where we deviate is how u view romance...i bliv u can have a romantic rxn without sex, just like u can have a sexual rxn without much romance

Ujnwosu:
I have never seen it written down anywhere that it is a law for a lady to have sex with her bf in a relationship so this is a very sexist article. I don't understand why you should demand for such as if it's your right and it actually isn't but a matter of choice. Sex generally means more to women than men so that is why some ladies want deeper commitment before engaging in it. The society these days has made it become normal for guys to think it is their right when they are not even married to you. No one forced you to date her or buy things for her in d first place. Not that am condemning girls that do it but it is strictly a matter of choice and not coercion or giving an ultimatum for relationship.

very funny hearing this from a girl....did u read what OP wrote at all.? he said d relationship should define right from d beginning.... is dat not fair enough.....if u don't know girls have actually arm twist their boy friends to part with gifts and money... I have seen when a guy was ready to marriage a girl....dis girl complained about her phone., d guy promise to get her one after d marriage since marriage requires spending a lot of money.....do u know d girl use d marriage to forcefully demand for d phone or else it won't take place.....tell me what is more foolish than this

franugo:


Oga we r basically saying d same thing, where we deviate is how u view romance...i bliv u can have a romantic rxn without sex, just like u can have a sexual rxn without much romance

Romance is the expressive and pleasurable feeling from an emotional attraction towards another person. This feeling is often associated with sexual attraction. It is eros rather than agape, philia, or storge.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Romance_(love)

i dont understand Nigerians anymore...oga ooo. people cant read and understand plain English!!!.
all the ladies saying a lady bla bla ,reread what he posted!!!
he said " Anyone who feels she can't do sex shouldnt go into a Romantic relationship!!!!"
simple!!, i.e if you won't let him fck u,dont go into relationship where you kiss, smooch, suck urselfs Otan!!!!
you have a choice fine
make your choices known to him simple.
if u feel sex is a no! be in a non romantic relationship. where it's pure, no immoralities involved. sefini

i guess most people didnt even read what op posted sef

escapefromusa:


Not if ur like my friends and I. When we tell a girl. I will fly u out and she so excited for 3 or 4k usd. You know shes junk.

Many of us are looking for girls that respond with "when u pay my bride price u can fly me anywhere u want".

We can make that 3 -4k from commissions. But they dont know.

Uncles mistress took 5M naira and ran. She thought hit the jackpot. But he has 3 children in NYC attending private catholic school and a wife living in a 2 bedroom apt. That cost 1.8K usd per month.

Why is your uncle cheating on his wife?

Fourwinds:
so what u wrote and what isaid earlier., what is d difference.?

D gal hasn't done anything wrong by expecting celibacy 4 a given period. She doesn't need to state it, though its best she does to avoid issues down d line. Its d guy dt wants sex dt should do so early enuff bro..
.
.dt having been said, i never hear people dy distinguish between types of rxn b4 entering them. 'would u be my gf?', 'yes' n voila, they're in a rxn. naija people rarely specify d kinda rxn they want by saying 'romantic rxn' b4 d dating starts

openmine:


Romance is the expressive and pleasurable feeling from an emotional attraction towards another person. This feeling is often associated with sexual attraction. It is eros rather than agape, philia, or storge.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Romance_(love)

Sexual attraction in a rxn is a given, sexual intimacy on d other hand isn't. where we differ bro is what romance entails in a rxn.

franugo:


D gal hasn't done anything wrong by expecting celibacy 4 a given period. She doesn't need to state it, though its best she does to avoid issues down d line. Its d guy dt wants sex dt should do so early enuff bro..
.
.dt having been said, i never hear people dy distinguish between types of rxn b4 entering them. 'would u be my gf?', 'yes' n voila, they're in a rxn. naija people rarely specify d kinda rxn they want by saying 'romantic rxn' b4 d dating starts

look it is selfish for u to say d guy should state his own part how d relationship should go y d girl is silent on her part....both should open up simple......FYI I always state d purpose of my relationship and in most cases t does not last because I have discovered most Nigeria girls are into relationship because of material gain not necessary marriage....I go into relationship for marriage sake ok

franugo:


Sexual attraction in a rxn is a given, sexual intimacy on d other hand isn't. where we differ bro is what romance entails in a rxn.

its quite simple...just "define ur kind relationship" wit u partner...whether romance is involved or not....that's wat the OP was trying to say...

Mosjentle:
i dont understand Nigerians anymore...oga ooo. people cant read and understand plain English!!!.
all the ladies saying a lady bla bla ,reread what he posted!!!
he said " Anyone who feels she can't do sex shouldnt go into a Romantic relationship!!!!"
simple!!, i.e if you won't let him fck u,dont go into relationship where you kiss, smooch, suck urselfs Otan!!!!
you have a choice fine
make your choices known to him simple.
if u feel sex is a no! be in a non romantic relationship. where it's pure, no immoralities involved. sefini

i guess most people didnt even read what op posted sef

where u don hear naija people dy specify d kinda rxn they want by saying 'romantic rxn'? besides IMO, romance doesn't necessarily have to end up with with sex

openmine:

its quite simple...just "define ur kind relationship" wit u partner...whether romance is involved or not....that's wat the OP was trying to say...

Romance is expected in a guy-gal rxn...things like writing a poem 4 her, she writing a song 4 him, holding a door 4 her etc... sex doesn't have 2 be d culmination of romantic gestures.
gotta do devotion bro, later things

pocohantas:
Nigerian men and the overflogged, 'what you offer is sex', then in the same breathe say if you can't give sex...stay away from relationships. It's not about what she can offer but what you willingly accept. If you give the average guy everything, without sex...lots of them won't be satisfied. Face it and stop the 'it's all you can offer' talk.

When will you guys realise that sticking with a girl who offers just sex and isn't ready to improve, makes you as stupid, if not more stupid than the girl? You reserve the right to walk away from these kind of girls with your values intact...but you stay, because what you also want is sex.


I just imagine how angry some people will be if a girl says guys without money shouldn't think of romantic affairs. Don't give me that, so you sell your body. Good number of Nigerian relationships are fukcd up, guys in it for sex...girls for money.

Tueeh!!!

u see y I like truth....ur last sentence there is d truth....both parties are guilty....

Silentscreamer:
Hmmm... Seems nigerian guys lives depend on sex. See ranting.

You don't need to light up dear, I love black queens

Comprehension is really a problem for some people.

Safiaa:
This thread just doesnt nake any sense to me.

it won't make any sense..... since it didn't favour d female gender.... but. what I just read from OP"s thread was a balanced mutual relationship

Benita27:
There's no sense in the thread. Ask yourself this question; is your main motive for going into a relationship with a lady "Sex?". If yes, then you shouldn't be in a relationship. We have brothels where you could patronise prostitutes if you so much desire sex.

Guys who reason like this offer absolutely nothing in relationships.

and u would say relationshio mustnt end in marriage....is dat not.? I just hope every party will abide by d rule....imagine saying no to sex in relationship and u later find out d girl is giving d pvssy out to someone else while u spend.....arrant nonsense....



I'm very good at appying rules but don't dare my principle as stupidity