I once read Linda Ikeji's very superficial blog. This is what she had to say about Dare Art Alade marrying a slightly older woman who had more money than him:

I am hearing gists  that newly married Dare has relocated to Abuja full time to start family life with his new bride Deola Ayeni who has a multi-million naira furniture business and contract deal over there. They said he might be stepping out of the music scene for a while to pursue contracts as initiated by his wife who has already started introducing him to those that matter in Abuja. All I'll say here is that I hope Dare married for love. Any other reason besides love is not good enough for marriage.

She insinuates very clearly that he married the woman for her money, because he is a guy and has no money control and the woman does

This is what she had to say about Sylvia Edem marrying Chris Emechete the aviation millionaire:

Beautiful ex-Miss Nigeria, Sylvia Edem Emechete is expecting her first baby with hubby of one year, Chris Emechete, in July. I read that they recently celebrated their first wedding anniversary some days ago. They got married April 15th 2006 in Lagos, and Sylvia got a Mercedes Benz S-Class with personalised plate number E1 SYL  as a surprise wedding anniversary present from hubby. I hear the hubby is super rich with investments in Dubai, UK and the USA. They say he drives a brand new Infiniti QX56, a Ferrari F430, and a Range Rover Vogue. This girl marry husband abeg! I also read that they live in a five bedroom mansion in Surrey in London and they jet-set to various countries around the world. Sylvia is a director in her hubby's aviation company. The koko of this gist is that our former Miss Nigeria will soon join mother's club. She's living the life she's always dreamt  of. I'm happy for her!


Can you see the double standard of Nigerian women, Sylvia marries money and it is okay for her, they are not concerned whether it is love. It is a good relationship because Mr Emechete has money control, imagine the statement: "This girl marry husband abeg!"


Can you see the greedy creatures? These are the people you say are interested in 50-50 relationship. Any man who does not understand the principle of control and practice it to some extent is digging a pit of sorrow for himself. I have learnt my lesson, to others I say, be wise. Be wise!

platinumnk:

@ David- I lost family members due to poisoning.

and i can show you families here who have lost members to poisoning. I guess the point you fail to see is that any ill you attribute to Nigeria is NOT isolated to Nigeria alone.

platinumnk:

maybe u think Nigeria is all rosy but even going by what I read here its a lie in itself

I never said Nigeria is a bed of roses . . . if it is i wont be here today. But to say it is any worse than the US is a blatant lie! I am more afraid of black-on-black crime here than i ever would in Abeokuta where i grew up.

platinumnk:

When in all my 16 years of life I have never bribed a cop, never was afraid to walk around my neighboohood because of kidnappers. . . and actually when i dial 911 helps comes.

I walked the streets of Abeokuta and Lagos at night too, as a 10 yr old i could walk 4 hours from school home just to have fun WITHOUT anyone having a panic attack about me being kidnapped. Perhaps 9-11 does not work in Nigeria . . . but we did just fine.

I lived in Nigeria for 22 yrs . . . NEVER once did i bribe a policeman, never once did i see an armed robber (not saying they dont exist) . . . puhlease spare us this nonsense.

Many of those who castigate Nigeria have never lived more than 2 months there themselves.

platinumnk:

Submit to who? why? Am i less than them? Did I not also work and earn my degrees?

lol and they say men are the ones with ego problems. That man you expect to help you wash and cook didnt earn his degrees abi? Marriage takes a lot more than all this hot air you are blowing here o.   Its a full time investment that requires plenty of self sacrifice. You better start learning now.

platinumnk:

Because he has a differnt chromosone I should jump when he say jump?

but you expect him to jump when you say jump abi?

platinumnk:

Na, whats wrong with mutual respect?
So he says "baby I want to buy a 100,000 car though we are late in our mortage and I want you to submit to my will, I should do what he say?

Submission is all about mutual respect, you are the one getting it wrong.

platinumnk:

Someone provide me an example of this so called submissiveness and tell me why its better than 50/50 mutual respect.

50/50 mutual respect i would not have a problem discussing things with my man because i know he respects me, and I would listen to him because  I respect his opinons, and we would eventually get to a solution.

Please tell me where submissiveness is in order.

you just described submission yourself. Cant do any better than that myself.

So the woman would have to do all the compromising and the guy just sit there?

Man! Im the wrong se*  then  

TOPE2000!:

As painful or annoying it may sound
There is nothing like 50-50 in a relationship. I dont knw abt anybody else ooo
cuz there cant be two bosses in a house, as long as my opinions n idea are respected and i am respected. i am fine.

Relationship invloves alot of compromise n scarifies so therefore there is nothing like 50-50.

I see one woman who understands what marriage is all about here.

platinumnk:

So the woman would have to do all the compromising and the guy just sit there?

Man! Im the wrong se*  then  

In most cases YES, It sucks yeah
i mean who gives up their careers usually to take care of the children?
When the woman forsake the home for 50-50 (why cant do the same as my partner), she is really putting her family in danger. Having it all is a myth. God made us with a purpose and assigned us our roles.

Paul said the woman to build home and the man provide for the home through the participation of the marketplace . . . . even in the bibile there is nothing like 50-50

Women were made of to be MEN'S HELPER. it says so in genesis hun

Many of those who castigate Nigeria have never lived more than 2 months there themselves.


hahahaha I laugh in Igbo- many of those who castigate Nigeria still LIVE there

Wasnt u raggin on Nigeria on the Haiti thread

davidylan:



Submission is all about mutual respect, you are the one getting it wrong.

So Men should submit to wives abi?

Mutual respect is NOT the same as submission.

Do you know how degrading  the word Submission is?


a: The state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

submissive - inclined or willing to submit to orders or wishes of others or showing such inclination; "submissive servants"; "a submissive reply"; "replacing troublemakers with more submissive people"


submissive - abjectly submissive; characteristic of a slave or servant; "slavish devotion to her job ruled her life"; "a slavish yes-man to the party bosses"- S.H.Adams; "she has become submissive and subservient

TOPE2000!:

In most cases YES, It sucks yeah
i mean who gives up their careers usually to take care of the children?
When the woman forsake the home for 50-50 (why cant do the same as my partner), she is really putting her family in danger. Having it all is a myth. God made us with a purpose and assigned us our roles.

Paul said the woman to build home and the man provide for the home through the participation of the marketplace . . . . even in the bibile there is nothing like 50-50

Women were made of to be MEN'S HELPER. it says so in genesis hun

** throws degrees in trash**

Sigh, I guess its to sit here and wait for a rich man because Im nothing more than a baby-maker

I guess if everybody was "homemakers" then we wouldnt have Refrigerators, computers, (Grace Hopper)

Will u stop look at dictionary for the word submission plat
Yeash some guys are ASSHOLE and they take the submission thing to a whole new level but the fact still remains that women are to be sumissive to their husband and MEN are the head of their household. .  .its in the BIBLE.

Platinum replies to David by exaggerating his point in an attempt to prove him wrong. As expected, David replies, also exaggerating Platinums point as well as trying to salvage his already misconstrued point, Platinum replies, what a mess!

You both clearly have different beliefs and neither of you will successfully convince the other! The good thing is there's someone for everyone, so just free yourselves OK.

platinumnk:




** throws degrees in trash**

Sigh, I guess its to sit here and wait for a rich man because Im nothing more than a baby-maker

I guess if everybody was "homemakers" then we wouldnt have Refrigerators, computers, (Grace Hopper)

Tell me you darl . . . . nobody will demand submission from you more than a RICH guy Infact they will rule you.

platinumnk:

Many of those who castigate Nigeria have never lived more than 2 months there themselves.


hahahaha I laugh in Igbo- many of those who castigate Nigeria still LIVE there

Wasnt u raggin on Nigeria on the Haiti thread

As always you get things easily confused . . . i wasnt ragging on Nigeria . . . simply wondering why Nigeria is wasting millions it doesnt have to "help" Haiti when it is no better condition. I understand how tough things are in Nigeria, but i dont call it a lawless hell hole, make false claims that divorce is not allowed there or claim that the actions of one man is representative of others.

platinumnk:

So Men should submit to wives abi?

Mutual respect is NOT the same as submission.

Do you know how degrading  the word Submission is?


a: The state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

submissive - inclined or willing to submit to orders or wishes of others or showing such inclination; "submissive servants"; "a submissive reply"; "replacing troublemakers with more submissive people"


submissive - abjectly submissive; characteristic of a slave or servant; "slavish devotion to her job ruled her life"; "a slavish yes-man to the party bosses"- S.H.Adams; "she has become submissive and subservient

unfortunately you have allowed society and dictionaries to determine what submission truly means. In the biblical sense it meant something far different. Christ was the leader of the disciples and YET was submissive to them in washing their feet, did it make Him any less of a man?

Submission to your husband does not entail slavery, i dont think a lot of women understand how much power they wield over their husbands.

I'm sure Tope2000 can help you on this one . . . and she's a woman too who is planning for a life of slavery with any man.

Poster, wow!!! It must be rough being this bitter and twisted!!! And some guys wonder why they cant find a decent woman with this attitude! What a lot of dribble!!!

Just a tip, us women have a way to make you think you are in control but we are the ones pulling the strings, lol!!!! The joke is on you!!!

platinumnk:




** throws degrees in trash**  

Sigh, I guess its to sit here and wait for a rich man because Im nothing more than a baby-maker  

I guess if everybody was "homemakers" then we wouldnt have Refrigerators,  computers,  (Grace Hopper)      

lol a rich man? you probably will have to submit your shopping list before you get money . . .

What you wrote above baffles me, you make it sound as if "submissive" women are all at home simply sweeping the floor and cooking. My mother is an example of a submissive woman (a thing i didnt like growing up because i once used to see the world like you 50-50). Well she never stayed home one day, she is a medical doc and a consultant with the WHO to boot. My dad has to cook his own food and clean his own stuff when she's out of the home (which is quite frequently).

So what exactly was your point? There are submissive women out there with way more qualifications than you can ever dream of. They have careers too.

David leave Plat alone jor, she is still young and she has this western ideas abt marriage, very soon they will all change.

PLAT, see what u dont knw is that men may be the head of the household but its the women that control the house very soon u will begin to learn hun

submission is not slavery, yes some guys think it means they can rule you. those are the types u shud run away from.

Tink_sh:

Just a tip, us women have a way to make you think you are in control but we are the ones pulling the strings, lol!!!! The joke is on you!!!

THank you . . finally another woman who understand. Most men knws without us they cant even find their boxers. we are the one controlling the house God created us because he knws how useless they wud be without us

TOPE2000!:

David leave Plat alone jor, she is still young and she has this western ideas abt marriage, very soon they will all change.

PLAT, see what u dont knw is that men may be the head of the household but its the women that control the house very soon u will begin to learn hun

submission is not slavery, yes some guys think it means they can rule you. those are the types u shud run away from.

the funny thing is that the idea isnt even western!  The women's lib movement is what brought about the 50-50 ideas and we see where that has landed them. 50% of US marriages end up in divorce within 2 yrs (now that is a 50 50 right there).

You'd be surprised that white girls are way more submissive than black girls, i've had white girls who wont even let you lift a finger or go near the kitchen . . . and they have degrees and dont consider themselves your slaves.

TOPE2000!:

David leave Plat alone jor, she is still young and she has this western ideas abt marriage, very soon they will all change.

PLAT, see what u dont knw is that men may be the head of the household but its the women that control the house very soon u will begin to learn hun

submission is not slavery, yes some guys think it means they can rule you. those are the types u shud run away from.

forget David and his mis constured fallcies


So Tope darl, what am I supposed to be submitting to?

Whats an example

First David Says we should submit now its the same as mutual respect

Dont you have a queen in England? lol  

For real though, what am i submitting to, if we have a problem cant we discuss it as adults, i might have a better way of doing things that he hasnt seen  

the joke is on you plat.

davidylan:



You'd be surprised that white girls are way more submissive than black girls, i've had white girls who wont even let you lift a finger or go near the kitchen . . . and they have degrees and dont consider themselves your slaves.

Oh so that is your idea of submission, for us to work and then you sit there flipping channels and scratching your belly?

davidylan:

the joke is on you plat.

no way, as long as there are men like elrazour there is still hope

davidylan:

the funny thing is that the idea isnt even western!  The women's lib movement is what brought about the 50-50 ideas and we see where that has landed them. 50% of US marriages end up in divorce within 2 yrs (now that is a 50 50 right there).

You'd be surprised that white girls are way more submissive than black girls, i've had white girls who wont even let you lift a finger or go near the kitchen . . . and they have degrees and dont consider themselves your slaves.

Acutally i have noticed that too.
The fact is no matter how bitter, most relationship i have seen ended up in divorce cuz of this 50-50 thing. it became like a competition btn a husband and wife . . ,  like who can do better
Truth is 2 ppl cant rule . . one has to rule while the there take the seat but always behind him to keep him check.
they say behind every successful man there is a woman, it didnt say beside
And behind every successful woman is there a MAN? guess having it all is a MYTH

platinumnk:

Oh so that is your idea of submission, for us to work and then you sit there flipping channels and scratching your belly?

see how i make an analogy and she assumes that is my idea of submission?  

I cant even be flipping channels, i love cooking as a hobby so there. My wife will enjoy herself and you bet she wont be a slave in her own home.

platinumnk:

no way, as long as there are men like elrazour there  is still hope

lol wake up to reality. There is NO man out there who believes in 50-50 no matter how loudly they make such a claim.

platinumnk:

no way, as long as there are men like elrazour there is still hope

Men like elrazur will prolly ask you to pay 50% of the bills too

Submission is a word which can be described and defined as "willing conciliation." That means that the wife should be "willing," not coerced. Wives are to respect their husbands. Husbands are to be considerate of and respect their wives. Both partners should be willing to "put the other's interests above his/her own" as Philippians 2 describes. The woman should be willing to submit to her husband not be unwilling or forced. The man should be a loving, servant leader – accountable and responsible to God and his family. A loving leader leads –doesn't manipulate or pressure. A submitter doesn't "take over."

It didnt say anything abt slavery, did it?

This place is hot!

TOPE2000!:

Acutally i have noticed that too.
The fact is no matter how bitter, most relationship i have seen ended up in divorce cuz of this 50-50 thing. it became like a competetion btn a husband and wife . . ,  like who can do better
Truth is 2 ppl can rule . . one has to rule while the there take the seat but always behind him to keep him check.
they say behind every successful man there is a woman, it didnt say beside
And behind every successful woman is there a MAN? guess having it all is a MYTH

o kare jare. You are ready to be a real wife and mother.

I know a couple whose husband does all the cooking while his wife sleeps all day . . . yet the woman defers to her husband as the head of the home. Both are as inseparable as twins. If God wanted it to be a 50-50 thing He would have created Eve on the same day he made Adam.

God never appeared to Sarah once . . . yet Sarah obtained the promise by virtue of her marriage to Abraham. God views the man as the light bearer for the marriage . . . it is his duty to teach his wife, lead her in love and humility, love her, cherish her and honor her. Nowhere did that same bible that advocates submission ask that a man treat his wife as his slave.
The bible says the husband shld love his wife as his own self . . . simple.

@ topic

Whatever!

davidylan:

see how i make an analogy and she assumes that is my idea of submission?  

I cant even be flipping channels, i love cooking as a hobby so there. My wife will enjoy herself and you bet she wont be a slave in her own home.

lol wake up to reality. There is NO man out there who believes in 50-50 no matter how loudly they make such a claim.

then y did you mention them

pshhh, are u everyman? fallacy

TOPE2000!:

Men like elrazur will prolly ask you to pay 50% of the bills too

Submission is a word which can be described and defined as "willing conciliation." That means that the wife should be "willing," not coerced. Wives are to respect their husbands. Husbands are to be considerate of and respect their wives. Both partners should be willing to "put the other's interests above his/her own" as Philippians 2 describes. The woman should be willing to submit to her husband not be unwilling or forced. The man should be a loving, servant leader – accountable and responsible to God and his family. A loving leader leads –doesn't manipulate or pressure. A submitter doesn't "take over."

It didnt say anything abt slavery, did it?

But what exactly are we submitting to?
Like what?

michelin89:

@ topic

Whatever!

you are a special case.

TOPE2000!:

Men like elrazur will prolly ask you to pay 50% of the bills too

Submission is a word which can be described and defined as "willing conciliation." That means that the wife should be "willing," not coerced. Wives are to respect their husbands. Husbands are to be considerate of and respect their wives. Both partners should be willing to "put the other's interests above his/her own" as Philippians 2 describes. The woman should be willing to submit to her husband not be unwilling or forced. The man should be a loving, servant leader – accountable and responsible to God and his family. A loving leader leads –doesn't manipulate or pressure. A submitter doesn't "take over."

It didnt say anything abt slavery, did it?

this girl is one smart woman i say!

the bible records Sarah as calling Abraham her Lord (a sign of her submissive relationship with him) YET Sarah was the one calling the shots when it came to Hagar and Ishmael. She even laughed in the presence of Abraham and the angels . . . a thing no servant would dare do.

davidylan:

you are a special case.

I just find all these topics boring. Make them pack themselves for a spaceship and move to another planet without women.

platinumnk:

But what exactly are we submitting to?
Like what?

Well, there is no book that lists what we have to be submissive to. every relationship is different so . . . .  
when u get married, u'd figure it out

all this negativity surrounding women

at this young age
i know what ive been thru

because of the nuisances called men!

i mean hw many of u deserve good women? thru the work u do, thru the way u behave?? by ur simple reasoning??

now the next thing is to start calculating and strategizing relationships??

*shakes head in disgust*

when i tell people i see men as toys to **ck and drop

they calll me crazy

ill just direct them here!!

men that have nothing- do nothing and are worth nothing

think they can talk anywho!!

kmt

Im off|!

davidylan:

you are a special case.

this girl is one smart woman i say!

the bible records Sarah as calling Abraham her Lord (a sign of her submissive relationship with him) YET Sarah was the one calling the shots when it came to Hagar and Ishmael. She even laughed in the presence of Abraham and the angels . . . a thing no servant would dare do.

whats the difference in mutual respect?
Men and women are not the same, but shouldnt he be willing to listen to my ideas?

Samson submitted to Deliah and cut his hair hahahhahaha