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Do Long Distance Relationships Work? - Romance (9) - Nairaland

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Long Distance Relationships: Just Say No To The Torture. / How To Overcome The Pains Of Distance Relationships / Romantic Love Text Message And Advice For Distance Relationships (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ashbaby(f): 9:10pm On Jan 18, 2006
AguNwoke:

Hey, Ashbaby: Wanna be my lady no5? wink
Heck no! shocked I'm someone's lady no.1! cheesy That would be degrading to myself to be a number five!!! rolleyes

AguNwoke:

Just showing some possible pitfalls of a long distance relationship/relationships that's all! cool
I think more of saying what some ppl in long distance relationships do. You're more of trying to say that they are impossible, which I don't think is true. The broth coagulates because of ppl like you. angry
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by AguNwoke(m): 9:15pm On Jan 18, 2006
Ashbaby:

I think more of saying what some people in long distance relationships do.
You're more of trying to say that they are impossible, which I don't think is true. The broth coagulates because of people like you. angry

It's not my fault, true, long distance relationship is very hard work!

ah beg - na condition mek crayfish back bend o!  wink
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ashbaby(f): 9:35pm On Jan 18, 2006
AguNwoke:

It's not my fault, true, long distance relationship is very hard work!
Well, that's true, then why get involved if you know yourself and that you can't possibly and obviously make a long distance relationship work? unless you don't know yourself....
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by AguNwoke(m): 9:40pm On Jan 18, 2006
Ashbaby:

Well, that's true, then why get involved if you know yourself and that you can't possibly and obviously make a long distance relationship work? - unless you don't know yourself.... ?

It never started out that way.
Thought I could make it work, tried my hardest.

Also, I don't like seeing my ladies sad, I find it hard to break up with them. cry
No bulls%$t - I'm being honest here. cry
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ashbaby(f): 1:57am On Jan 19, 2006
AguNwoke:

It never started out that way.
Thought I could make it work, tried my hardest.

Also, I don't like seeing my ladies sad, I find it hard to break up with them. cry
No bulls%$t - I'm being honest here. cry
When you realize that you can't do it, the least painful time to let go is at that point of realization, otherwise, it'll become harder, and maybe almost impossible, and eventually, you'll also get very hurt, ur reputation will get ruined, among other more dynamic problems. And if anything, they'll even be more hurt if they find out that you've been playing them all along, yet you are genuine (I want to imagine) in your consultations with them. And then again, it's draining you financially. That's the last thing that you want. I think you deserve to live comfortably, and if bills, bills, bills are making you so worn out (as you have put across) it's probably not worth it.
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by mide2(f): 11:11am On Jan 19, 2006
Really, i've always tot LDR doesn't stand a chance but that went out the window when i found the love of my heart.
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by kallylove(m): 2:37pm On Jan 19, 2006
I was once in deep lovre with a girl but the distant btw us keep the love apart.
It's a sad storey and one of these day i will publish it.
What title shall i give it
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Z4M4eva(f): 2:54pm On Jan 19, 2006
kallylove:

What title shall i give it

The story of your sad relationship sad
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ashbaby(f): 5:29pm On Jan 19, 2006
kallylove:

What title shall i give it
The Love Rift. sad
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by AguNwoke(m): 6:43pm On Jan 19, 2006
Ashbaby:

And then again, it's draining you financially. That's the last thing that you want. I think you deserve to live comfortably, and if bills, bills, bills are making you so worn out (as you have put across) it's probably not worth it.
Cheiiii,
Na true u talk o!
Ok - by next year I go try change embarassed
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ashbaby(f): 11:04pm On Jan 19, 2006
All the best, aight!
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by AguNwoke(m): 12:05am On Jan 20, 2006
Thanx cheesy
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by sweetpea(f): 1:07pm On Jan 20, 2006
It always difficult to have someone far away from u.it takes devine intervention for things to be the same way they were when u were together.
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by kallylove(m): 1:40pm On Jan 20, 2006
Well.
I think I will go for "@ashbaby title"
Z4AM you sound so mean
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Z4M4eva(f): 1:55pm On Jan 20, 2006
kallylove:

Well.
I think I will go for "@ashbaby title"
Z4AM you sound so mean

Hey man! How do I sound mean?
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by kallylove(m): 4:48pm On Jan 20, 2006
rolleyes I thought you will at least give me a nice "TITLE" grin
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Z4M4eva(f): 4:52pm On Jan 20, 2006
kallylove:

rolleyes I thought you will at least give me a nice "TITLE" grin

Awww...don't worry Hun...but really you got to believe me...I had no intentions of sounding mean or summin...I didn't even know I sounded mean! man...hey I ain't like that! aiite? smiley Hey please receive ma apology kisses! kiss kiss kiss kiss cheesy
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by kallylove(m): 4:53pm On Jan 20, 2006
I think a long distance has only one cure to make it stable.

And that is: "Communication"
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Z4M4eva(f): 4:54pm On Jan 20, 2006
kallylove:

I think a long distance has only one cure to make it stable.

And that is: "Communication"

True that!...but hey have you recieved ma apology kisses? tongue kiss cheesy
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by kallylove(m): 4:56pm On Jan 20, 2006
"It's nothing Ok?"


Me I'll a girl in mah househood to make mah chicks
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by kallylove(m): 4:58pm On Jan 20, 2006
Yeah!!!!!!!!

I've reveived it......... A sweet kisses kiss kiss kiss kiss

grin grin grin grin
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Z4M4eva(f): 4:59pm On Jan 20, 2006
kallylove:

"It's nothing Ok?"

Ok smiley

kallylove:

Yeah!!!!!!!!

I've reveived it......... A sweet kisses kiss kiss kiss kiss

grin grin grin grin

Aiite...glad to hear that!thnx smiley kiss cheesy
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Z4M4eva(f): 5:00pm On Jan 20, 2006
Yeah so Long Distance Relationship can work if there is lots of communication!
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by kallylove(m): 5:04pm On Jan 20, 2006
Yes thats what I said.
It makes them closer even if they are not seeing each other.
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ashbaby(f): 7:52pm On Jan 21, 2006
Yeah, that's true. Communication and honesty. I can communicate and not be saying what's actually happening, but what I think one needs to hear. That's kind of scary.
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ladylike(f): 10:21am On Jan 23, 2006
[b]Hello from a black girl in the US.  cool They call me "Lady". I have enjoyed reading the Nairaland messages, so I became a member. I'm not sure if long distance relationships work, but I hope they do. I hear both sides of the issue, but I am especially curious for personal reasons.

I have met a man on the internet. He is a Nigerian man. He seems like the man God may have for me, but I still wonder if it will work for many reasons:
1) there are many warnings not to trust a Nigerian man, simply because he is Nigerian (which seems weird to me, b/c I know that anyone can be dishonest)...still i wonder if this should be a thing to watch for
2) because we are from different cultures and I have heard black women are not respected by the African man and his family after the relationship starts
3) Nigeria is a looooonnnngggg way from me, and I wonder what effect his cultural ideas of polygamy and female roles has on him

The main reasons I am even contemplating the relationship is because
1) he says he is a Christian and he acts God fearing (so far)
2) we seem to have many things in common from our conversation, we are even both twins (he has begun to call me and we e-mail and chat often)
3) he is direct, even about things that he could hide (like his feelings on marriage, family, money, etc.) and I think he appreciates my directness also.
4) he says he is educated and employed, so I feel he will not be intimidated by my education and we will be able to communicate on many levels, despite cultural differences.

This will be the first time that I have dated someone I met on the internet. This will also be the first time that I have dated anyone that is not a black American. However I have lived in other countries and with different cultures, so I'd like to think the cultural differences won't be too glaring or unacceptable.

Although no one can tell me my future, does anyone have any suggestions on how I might be able to tell if he is being truthful about his status of work, etc. in Nigeria?  Anyway, if Nigerian men do lie, how can I tell the difference than from when any other man lies? I am a trusting person, and I always ask for honesty from the beginning. I always give the warning (as I have to him) that if he makes me question his integrity I have no problem ending the relationship.

Can anyone relate to my situation and give me any positive advice about this? GreatPeter, and all the regulars of course I would appreciate your comments.  grin

Thanks in advance.
kiss, Lady
[/b]
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by shaddy(f): 12:18pm On Jan 23, 2006
Hi Ladylike,

just read wat u posted.Not all Nigerian guys are not honest.Some african american pple 2 are not honest as well.The only advise i can give you is to follow your heart some pple met their guys/girls thru d internet and it works out for them while some pple don't like internet dating.you are the only person that will surely knw if the guy is honest , open minded and his trustworthy.Your relationship may work out very well and it may not.

To tell if he is truthful about his work and so on, i can't give an answer for that .its you that must try and find that out thru differnt ways to make sure he is honest with you.Don't just belief wat he says .Try and Confirm it as well.
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by kallylove(m): 12:38pm On Jan 23, 2006
@shaddy smiley
You did great. A good advice.
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ladylike(f): 6:17pm On Jan 23, 2006
shaddy:

Hi Ladylike,

just read what u posted.Not all Nigerian guys are not honest.Some african american people 2 are not honest as well.The only advise i can give you is to follow your heart some people met their guys/girls through d internet and it works out for them while some people don't like internet dating.you are the only person that will surely knw if the guy is honest , open minded and his trustworthy.Your relationship may work out very well and it may not.

To tell if he is truthful about his work and so on, i can't give an answer for that .its you that must try and find that out through differnt ways to make sure he is honest with you.Don't just belief what he says .Try and Confirm it as well.

@Shaddy
thank you. he seems like a nice guy so i will give him a chance. perhaps i am hesistant becuase i ALREADY feel something for him and it seems a bit strange to me. i just wish it was easier to find out quickly what was real and what was not about him. if he was American i could find out very quickly through my resources, etc. Alas, he's from a whole different part of the world...so my patience must be my virtue. this can be good. well, look forward to my new place on NL, so cheers.
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ashbaby(f): 8:18pm On Jan 23, 2006
@Lady,
All the best! Time will tell. I hope your eyes will stay open to note any inconsistencies, even the slightest of them. If not, he might be....as you say, the man God intended for you. And if it is, then that's the best thing that could ever happen to you!
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by madam: 2:01pm On Jan 24, 2006
Well I guess it would work fine 4 some people... But i rather have my guy at arms reach.... I no like to waker too far 4 love
Re: Do Long Distance Relationships Work? by Ashbaby(f): 5:39pm On Jan 24, 2006
Well, yeah. That's true...dependant on preference.

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