I deduce she doesnt want to be tied down by any marital law,just like u said,she is out for youthful exploit,bt i will suggest u start prayg to God to change her if u love her indeed.

. Come :-Xto t-X ;Dhink of if, are u their father or their sponsor er? Is either somthin is wrong, lik u dick is not peformin.if u really wan marry, 4get her n move on

Especially with African women if they do not want to marry its usually because

1)she might have done it before and is still traumatised by the experience.
2) she knows or has a strong indication that if she does it with you it will end in divorce. (check yourself are you faithful, are you pulling your weight in the home or being looked after in all matters including financial, emotional etc are you too controlling and given to anger at very little things)
3)She might only be interested in having children with you and not some of the negatives she attributes to getting married.
4)She might just like to be in control of her life and destiny

When you put the chicken before the egg, its usual for the excitement of starting a life together to dissipate. Its usually the men that are dragged kicking and screaming to the altar where couples have children first and, if you are the one pushing for it then one has to ask why? If its important to you that you get married you need to let her know and that she might loose you and its up to her to decide how she values your relationship together.

Good luck

bleedingheart: I am very confused, the woman i love, cherished and adore so much is not ready for us to get married. we already had 2 kids, a boy and a girl. Each time i bring up the topic it always result in fighting... I have done everything expected of a man to have a good home by providing and giving her whatever she wants yet she does not want me as her husband... her family loves me so much and they are confused why she is acting in this manner ....What do I do since we already had 2 kids? Should i let go of her or give her some breathing space? Pls help me out....

If you had followed God's commandment which states that you should flee from fornication and all forms of s/e/x.ual immoralities, you would not be in this sorry predicament right now. She probably has refused to marry you because to her, you are just a s/p.e.r.m donor. Maybe she does not want to get married to begin with and only wanted kids. I mean I can't blame her considering how most of you Nigerian bred males treat your wives like glorified housemaids. Atleast, you have learnt your lesson. Next time, before you generously donate your fluid to any lady for baby reproduction, make sure she is your legal wife first. Goodluck!

bleedingheart: hmmm just that she is not taking good care of the kids, always on the phone and wont let me know who is calling.... she wont answer some calls that come in when am around....

That is it, she's not ready to get married, because it will tie her down. She still prefer to flirt and f**k around, my fear is, even if she decides to get married to you, she will still flrt around. I will advise you look out for your wife elsewere. Goodluck.

bleedingheart: she is from abeokuta, a nigerian.... the family memebers are no problems.... i dont know wht she is hiding from me.

children out of wedlock?
Amu Igwe! Weh yuh deh?!

@poster don't mind me oo.
I'm trying to piss off another nlder.

As for the topic, the only thing important in your life
should be your children. Sure, you love her and want a stable
home for the kids but if she is not ready or happy, it makes
no sense trying to force what is not meant to be. That won't
make a happy home trust me.

Ijogz K: The kids are not yours... Cant u see the writing on the wall?

damn.

@ OP After 2 kids, 99% of the time, it is the woman that will be huzzling to be crowned, but your case seems so odddddddddd.

Painfully, i have to say this, Don't get married to her, even if she comes to ask for the marriage tomorrow.

yosmen: she has a spirit husband,take her for deliverance...

+100

cynthiafred67:

+100

Don't you have anything to say? Everywhere you comment it is +100, -5000, x20000 wtf?

of a truth, go and do a DNA test for those kids, we never can tell, they may not be your afterall.

+ 1, this is making sense

Yondesie: It is obvious she is cheating. It is also possible that she is religious.
If so, she is avoiding the 'STRONG GUILT' of being married and having an affair (Adultery). She is probably preferring the option of being a fornicator rather than adulterous.

She is hiding something, and what she is hiding is her affair with men. That explains why she is always on her phone, and wouldn't pick some calls in your presence.

The day she agrees to marry you is the day she decides to give up having affairs outside your bedroom.
Put her in a tight corner (create the tight corner) and insist that she makes a choice, either marry you or lose you. Then she will be made to face the reality and stop living in fantasy and carefree.

Thank you all, i really appreciate you guys... God Bless you All... Amen

sexkillz:
And how exactly did you sniff the air to know that? "I too sabi's of Nairaland Kingdom". . . Shior!

Wht else can restrain a normal woman from marrying a man she claims to love after having two kids for him and the family is not a problem?.....

March 30 2012 post reaching front page in 2022?