₦airaland Forum

ikbnice:
I hope you know that cell phones have grades.

And some are fake sef..chinko

Nigerian will soon be better.
Jesus is coming soon..



soon and I don't know av been unconsciously equated in meaning..coz wen we hear soon..we juz knw dat it's a synonym of I don't knw..



The emboldened is not a word u throw anyhow these days..
We all av a new definition of the word wit respect to the practical delays in our evriday lives ascribed to it.

So lemme help pastor kumuyi rephrase:
I don't knw when Nigeria will be better

Oh....the Nigerian Army now has a new orientation.
Let's say the No1 sole aim and objective of joinin the Nigeria army these days is to defeat boko haram...
Smh...

obongkaks:
If u go back in time to Genesis, u will see God relating with man on the basis of grace. Case in point, Adam and Eve sinned but God never punished them, rather he came down to them and even killed an animal to cloth them.

CAIN killed Abel and God never punished Cain rather he placed a mark on Cain so that no one wud kill him. Abraham was an Idol worshipper but God still called him and blessed him and his descendants.

All was well untill Man asked for the law. The law came to expose the faults of man and each fault stipulated punishments. How ever Jesus came to fulfill the requirement of the law cos man was helpless as Regards the law.

the angle from which u read the Holy bible, to av derived such alien understanding of the referenced scriptures is quite strange I must say..

In sequel to three previous threads

www.nairaland.com/3268719/3-biblical-facts-almost-
everyone#48206598

www.nairaland.com/3270169/3-biblical-facts-almost-
everyone

https://www.nairaland.com/3280130/3-biblical-facts-almost-everyone

--------------------

THE BIBLE NEVER CONCLUDED JESUS WAS A CARPENTER

I’m not saying He wasn’t a carpenter.
I’m only suggesting that it’s not clear.

Let’s look at the text:

“Isn’t this the carpenter, the son of Mary, and the brother
of James, Joses, Judas, and Simon?”
Mark 6:3


“Isn’t this the carpenter’s son? Isn’t His mother called
Mary, and His brothers James, Joseph, Simon, and
Judas?”
Matthew 13:55

--

These are two texts with variant and parallel meanings. We don't know for sure whose account is correct. There are two instances where his carpentry background is
mentioned, and they are parallel accounts. That is, Matthew
and Mark are describing the same event. It says that He is
both a carpenter, and the son of a carpenter.
I wouldn't like to bore u with the possible reasons for this issue.


----------

CLEANLINESS IS NEXT TO GODLINESS

This is one nice quote from the bible that we've always misinterpreted or misunderstood you think?
Guess Why!
It's not anywhere in the bible.
Francis Bacon is credited with these words of wisdom. Wanna know who he is? Google him up!

--------------

JESUS WAS NOT BORN IN A MANGER

A manger is a feeding trough. And nowhere in the bible story does
it suggest that Mary gave birth in a feeding trough.
For those of you who are still unclear on this, here is what
Luke 2:7 actually says:
--
"And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him
in swaddling cloths and LAID HIM IN A MANGER…"

--

So is that clear, Sir/Ma?
This isn’t an issue of critical scholarship or
liberal skepticism or whatever skills you got in theology debates. The text of the Bible itself
says that Jesus was born and then laid in a feeding trough, not born in one.
So, if you have ever said it in the past, please never again
say “Jesus was born in a manger.”
Thank you.

-----------------------------

P.S: Opposing views are welcomed. Atleast open your bible
and read thoroughly(and understand in context) before
coming forward with a debate we can learn from.

nnaemekanwachuk:
Bro . I will never belive that they are safe places bevcause l am a wittness.

witness to what, exactly?

4kings:
3. The journey back was 'similar', so it took the same time 150min=2&1/2hours.

7. "Nothing is wrong with it but you must admit that there is something wrong" - that is what is wrong with it.

1. "1" can be continuously halved till it gets to zero.

stil wrong!!
3. Has been answered already...try the rest

KingEbukasBlog:
The first one is 8 cos it is made of two zeros . All these riddles are old

correct..
All these riddles are old..yet na only one u ansa correctly...juz negodu!!

KingEbukasBlog:
7 months = 31 days
The same 7 months still have 28 days

wrong!!

2dugged:
nigress?, Tiger /tigress, nigga /nigress,hehehehe, I hope nor be sweetened youghurt? if not na dysentery you dey ask o

Nah... Na sour yorghurt

2dugged:
hehehehehehehehehe, I am a lady and my moniker was coined because of trolls,they inspired me to come up with the name

oh...that is a plausible ansa..flex on

2dugged:
and whats so unladylike in not backing down?

biko! Niggress, I made no reference to ur character in my statement. Kindly read again. To fight no hungry me dis aftanun oo.
I juz chow bitter-sweet yam with parfried egg. Mk e digest biko.
*sips chilled yorghurt*

*leans back and relaxes on couch*

*continues typing*

Cc: freeze001[the use of the 'Niggress' tin make sense abi?..*winks*..lolz]

freeze001:
I tire. Meanwhile I'm female so u wanna try 'niggress' or 'sistah'? Lol

lolz..uhm..Niggress seems cool to me...
Lemme go widah..

2dugged:
why do people always call me bro?,do i sound like a guy?,this is not the first nor fifth time

uh...thr cud be only 2 reasons for this..
1. Ur moniker is so, so unladylike

2. God might be trying to expose sumtin bou u, we the rest NLanders don't knw...so..erm..now will be a gudtime to confess....#juzSayin

freeze001:
You should learn to recognise sarcasm when u see it. Try to understand the nuances of English language especially when it's deliberately highlighted. Now read again carefully:

Ma Niggress!...u even missed whr I highlighted LAI(lie) Mohammed too sef.
U needn't go thru the stress mehn..let him and some inapt others throw needless jibes at me.
They are very welcome

4kings:
5. Minimum of SSCE 6. Snip - because the rest involves movement 8. 6 months.

all wrong

dunkem21:
You used advanced sarcasm..

Sorry for the barrage of attacks, people dey vex

lolz...tnx bro..I aint bothered a bit..
I knew very few wud tune to the reasonin frequency of my statements on dis thread...
It takes only an intelligent mind to decipher em'..

kernel504:
Stop fooling yourself. Why not relocate to Borno to prove a point.

good ..da means u agree that LAI mohammed is living up to virtue of his name...lolz
Juz take 2mins of ur time to look-up the word "pun" in the dictionary

Shelyklose:
Please just asking if it's right giving tithe from money earned from bets e.g nairabet

It is not right, only if sports betting is a SIN TO U.

lative:
2. he lives in a red bungalow n d last time I chkd, bungalows av no stairs
10. counterfeit money

Both correct..
Awaiting ur ansas to the rest...

whitecloth:
3.2½ hours = 150 minutes
4. Today, Tomorrow, Tuesday, Thursday.
5. Must have a minimum of OND/B.SC
6. Flow.

8. February.

5, 6, 8 are wrong

KwaraRat:
Pls kindly lead the way by relocating to the safe Borno.

You are only deceiving yourself with that rubbish above.

And next time get a dictionary at hand before you post rubbish here because it seems you do not understand the meaning of the word hypocrite.

Lolz...my mastery of our Lingua Franca is way beyond ur comprehension..don't try to seem clever.
You're the one who needs a dictionary to check the meaning of "Pun"

KwaraRat:
Zombie General

I hate hypocrites like U, if u can't accept Borno and Yobe being a safe place, then u're a threat to National Unity.
Gerarahiaa

.

OP..nice thread jaree...

Don't mind these anti-Nigerian oyinbos..

Every state in Nigeria is very well safe..

BORNO and YOBE are even the safest places at that..

I wonder why they would just talk as if they know naija pass our HONEST GOV'T, well represented by LAI Mohammed.

3 and 4 are Cake-walks for me mehn!

1. Half of zero is still zero.
What other number can be halved to make zero?[Solved: KingEbukasBlog]

------------------------

2. Everything Mr Seun owns is coloured red, he lives in Lagos in a red bungalow and his chairs are red, his tables are red.
His ceiling, walls and floor are all red.
All of his clothes are red, his shoes are red, even his carpet,
television and phone are red.
So What colour are his stairs?[Solved: lative]

--------------------------

3. I went on PH last week. There was a heck of a traffic and the journey took two and a half hours.
On my way back home, the traffic was similar, but I made it
back in just 150 minutes. How is this possible?[Solved: whitecloth]

---------------------------

4. Can you name four days which start with the letter "T"?
[Solved: whitecloth]
---------------------------

5. According to the Nigerian Constitution, in order to became President of the Nigeria; there are only five pre-
requisites. The candidate must:
.
a. be at least 35 years old.
b. be a citizen of the Nigeria.
c. have resided in the Nigeria for at least 15yrs.
d. have been born in Nigeria.
.
.
What is the fifth requirement?
.

--------------------------

6. Which is The Odd One and why?
.
a.FLOW
b.SNIP
c.TRAP
d.DRAW
e.BACK

-----------------------

7. Study this paragraph and all things in it. What is vitally
wrong with it? Actually, nothing in it is wrong, but you must
admit that it is most unusual. Don't just zip through it
quickly, but study it scrupulously. With luck you should spot
what is so particular about it and all words found in it. Can
you say what it is? Tax your brains and try again. Don't miss
a word or a symbol. It isn't all that difficult?

---------------------------

8. 7 months have 31 days. How many months have
28 days?[Solved: lative]

-----------------------------

9. What kind of room has no doors or windows?

-----------------------------

10. Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it,
knows it not. Whoever knows it, wants it not.
What is it?[Solved: lative]

-------------
DISCLAIMER NOTICE: Some facts in the above puzzles are fictitious.
Cc: Lalasticlala

ShySteady:
https://www.nairaland.com/3251033/5-words-nigerians-use-actually


This first appeared on Nairaland on 25th July 2016, but because the author is not a Muslim-Fulani, or a member of APC, it didn't hit front page.

Una well done o!

BUSTED!

These are very common words we tend to 'mispell' in our use of the Lingua Franca in speaking and writing. I'm a regular victim of some of these words too, just like y'all. God knows what would have become of our media convos, were it not for the regular saving grace we enjoy in the Autocorrect feature embedded in our various smartphones.
Atimes, we'd just look at some of these words and know there's something wrong, but we'd have to keep looking and re-spell the words severally to be able to figure out the error.
Yea rite! I fink I can hear someone say "who get time?"...
Atleast, not when u got some important message to pass across asap. If you'll agree with me; autocorrect feature can't and will not save u on all media/electronic platforms, since we're unconsciously abating the ink and paper age.
So, let's examine a few of a plethora of these commonly 'mispelled/mispelt' words.


Note: the correct spelling of the following words are being put in Upper-case form.

--------------------

1. Withold - WITHHOLD
2. Drunkeness - DRUNKENNESS
3. Seperate - SEPARATE
4. Excercise - EXERCISE
5. Maintainance - MAINTENANCE
6. Sustainance - SUSTENANCE
7. Aquire - ACQUIRE
8. Arguement - ARGUMENT
9. Priviledge - PRIVILEGE
10. Embarassment - EMBARRASSMENT
11. Harrassment - HARASSMENT
12. Ocassion - OCCASSION
13. Liason - LIAISON
14. Cemetry - CEMETERY
15. Strenght - STRENGTH
16. Personel - PERSONNEL
17. Questionaire - QUESTIONNAIRE
18. Reccommend - RECOMMEND
19. Amature - AMATEUR
20. Begining - BEGINNING
21. Tommorrow - TOMORROW
22. Flourescent - FLUORESCENT
23. Hygene - HYGIENE
24. Libary - LIBRARY
25. Noticable - NOTICEABLE
26. Rythm - RHYTHM
27. Underate - UNDERRATE
28. Hinderance. - HINDRANCE
29. Pronounciation - PRONUNCIATION
30. Lolz...I guess most of us didn't notice that throughout this thread, I spelt "Mispelt/Mispelled" wrong.
NOTE: "Misspelt/Misspelled" is the correct one.

toposi4naija:
Bro....which one be chatted aqain

Chat nah Chat!......

They do us easy for Romance section nah





The dude above me ehn.....very funny!

Professor! Biko no wash urself..."Chatted" is correct..
Apologize to the OP b4 I change my mind.

mandarin:
2kings 2:10-11. Please read again and again. The prophet was taken up to heaven by the chariot through a whirlwind

11 As they were walking along and talking together, suddenly
a chariot of fire and horses of fire APPEARED AND SEPARATED THE TWO OF THEM, and Elijah WENT UP TO HEAVEN IN A WHIRLWIND.



.

.
.

I quite understand the perspective you wanna employ here. But, sir, deductive reasoning cannot override the contextual explicitness of that passage.

Deductive reasoning wud actually create more confusion coz it can give different mental illustrations to that passage.
It's imaginable to say, the chariot separated them and went on its way, OR separated them and vanished OR separated them and carried Elijah to heaven[as we'd all like to bliv].
So, why bother stress ourselves with controversial perspectives to this, when the passage is quite explicit?