LoveKing:

Atreides

i can read through you.you already a "bad' girl, "rebel" in the making. what you need is a great deal of freedom from your Dad to explore the world beyond. But the world is scary, pleasurable, wicked, fun, and all that. I dont see you as a minor though. wish you were in p.h, would love to see you and teach you some things. Dont get infused with the mythology thing coz you might become a lesbian.

Seriously who is this not-so-smart ode?

@Topic
You will not understand now. Have your kids(esp female ones) and watch them grow into teenagers, you will definitely understand why your dad did that

So guys have forgotten women have different meaning to every word. Ask them what privacy means.If you have ever traveled via bus with a woman onboard and close to ur seat, you don die. It will be as if u in a call center. Second-hand smokers are like that situation. Any problems healthwise?

At OP, fathers will always be fathers. I sometimes don't like my dad's parenting method, but the truth is I will do the same thing with my kids and I'm sure they will also not like it. Yet the cycle goes on.

But I'm sure you have gotten over the issue by now.

Words of wisdom, delete suspicious texts That's what I do.

pmond:

Probably he checked your phone to reassure himself you're worthy of his trust and have nothing to worry about. Maybe your phone had been buzzing a lot lately, and definately those are boys calling, Boys are no good, and him being a man knows better -- so he want to help you think, when you can't.

Talkin' about trust… Wait 'till your dad read your post and he might not trust you for a long time. This is one of those reasons he keeps a check on you… cause now that you're unmonitored, you’re washing your dirty linen in public. You’re still immature - relax and let him guild you to maturity: Then you can do whatever.

FYI - Your privacy will always be invaded (wait until you have a boyfriend/husband)… Its very normal, cause people need to be checked -- or we probably might go astray. Happy New Year

Which bloody dirty linen is that? Is nairaland not anonymous anymore? Happy new year to you too!

omo_to_dun:

There is absolutely nothing wrong in checking your underage daughter's phone. A father does not do that simply because he is curious or does not trust his daughter, he does that because he loves her and feels the need to protect her. A couple of years ago, I would have agreed with lots of folks here that such an act was an invasion of privacy, however, as I am now more matured, experienced, and wiser, I understand even more that a parent will go to any length to protect a child. I'll advise the OP to empathize with her father, and consider what she would have done if she were in his position. And also remember, the OP claimed that she is closer to her father than she is to her mother, hence, I assume the greater need to protect.

Then, I hated my mother for being nosy. But now I understand and appreciate her nosiness. When I have my kids, God knows I'll be nosy, albeit in a Tom-Clancy stealth like manner, as opposed to my loving mother's Baba-Suwe-in-your-face style.

Baba-Suwe? Hehe. . Now that's some funny ish. .

jennykadry:

Seriously who is this not-so-smart ode?

@Topic
You will not understand now. Have your kids(esp female ones) and watch them grow into teenagers, you will definitely understand why your dad did that

Seriously,when i saw that post all i could do was wonder how some people's brains work. . And everybody always says i will understand when i grow up. That's probably true,but im not growing up/having kids anytime soon,so until then nko?

ferdiii:

So guys have forgotten women have different meaning to every word. Ask them what privacy means.If you have ever traveled via bus with a woman onboard and close to your seat, you don die. It will be as if u in a call center. Second-hand smokers are like that situation. Any problems healthwise?

Are you asking me whether i have any heatlth problems? If so,what does that have to do with anything? If not,why the question?

Abi na the dad wan marry em pikin?

so if the dad no wan marry im pickin he should allow her to go wayward?

Your Dad should also go through your Nairaland Posts to know better. Would be shellacking when we Guys are done with you, then you would give your Dad some credit.

@ Topic,

Should a dad buy his daughter a phone ?

banom:

@ Topic,

Should a dad buy his daughter a phone ?

He's not the one who bought it for me.

roymary:

Your Dad should also go through your Nairaland Posts to know better. Would be shellacking when we Guys are done with you, then you would give your Dad some credit.

I dont think he knows Nairaland even exists.

Atreides:

I dont think he knows Nairaland even exists.

don't be too sure about that, atreides!

^^^ He maybe on NL

^^lwkmd!
Nice contributions y'all got there. This reminds me of some years back while in sec school, my mum asked me if i had a gf. Sounded somehow cos she's the churchy type so i didn't expect her to say something like that. He's just trying to be protective of his daughter (duh!!! Something you've heard like million times)

Girlfriend, this is not the western world where a 1yr old child can call 911 and get his/her parent arrested.
we are all trying to go western forgetting that we have our own way of life.

* @ 16 1/7th year old, how did you get the money to buy the phone since your dad did not buy it for you?
*how do you get funds to buy your airtime, (d way u sound,ur eye don tear finish)
*you are not close to mum any particular reason?

irrespective of our ages, i believe we all need a sense of check and balance to guide in our daily life.
you mentioned somewhere in your post that the next day your dad went on like nothing happened, were you expecting he will come to you to apologise or talk about what he saw in your phone?
i believe he got all the info and it doesn't change the fact that he trusts you.

you are complaining about dad doing it. we will look out for when you have a boyfriend who does same or a husband who does same and you will run to NL to complain (thats is if NL is still in existence then).

i will do same to my children if i feel the need to but they wont know i do it.
you are still under his roof. live by the rules under the roof. and please remember to keep your phones and diary away from where dad will see them cos he will still browse through thme if he finds them anywhere around.

happy new year all

@2sleek,i saved up for it. I get an allowance and i save from that. I used to copy notes for people in school for a price. I have a big extended family-someone's always giving me money,or crediting me,or paying my internet subscription or worreva. Like i said,airtime is not my problem. As for me and my mom,even though we butt heads a lot,its not like we're not close or anything-I'm just closer to my dad. We have more in common.

As long as you are still depending on your parent, there is nothing like privacy. After all if anything happens you run to them . . .

....

Op, pls, take it likely with your dad, he's only doing his job as a father, believe me. Just like others have said, you'll get to know why he's doing that when you become a mother. Meanwhile, I'll like to share somethin with you. . .

Do you know that a man was sentenced to jail for 5 good years (in America) just b'cos, he checked on his wife email address? . . .The man said his wife was havin an affair with her X husband, of which the wife denied and called the police, and the outcome was 5years jail sentence (America is something else, can you imagine that?)

K, now tell me, would you prefer to be patient with your dad to be over protective on you just like he's doin now (so, when you'r grwon up, you can do whatever) or, would you like your dad to be jailed for 5years just b'cos, he invaded your privacy? (no offense meant tho, just a mere question)

Listen, young girl, forget about the trust issue you keep harping about. Only a foolish parent will trust a teenager. A teenager is by default irrational, and the parent must be there to guide you. Even if you have not given him any reason to distrust you so far, things can change in an instant with teenagers. So he has to continuously monitor you to make sure everything is going well. Next time, put a password on your phone and you won't have to worry about your dad going through it. However, your dad must do his job.

ranosky,
your unwittingly putting ideas into atreides' head!

@Genius,yeah. . And the minute i do that it becomes why am i locking my phone? What do i have to hide? He will take it to mean i'm acting suspiciously.

@Ranosky,of course i dont want my dad to go to jal. If he does who's gonna pay my school fees/clothing allowance etc?

i'm going to have to disagree with the majority of opinions on here.

the thing about trust is that u have to give it when u're certain and when u're in doubt. however, if he felt a need to go through your phone and make sure there was no secret life in there or serial despoiler using your head, i think he should have done so in your presence, with your permission.

nonetheless if you calm down for a bit, you'll just see that he's doing his best to protect his baby, and honey you won't understand why he feels threatened until you have something u're willing to die for (or kill) to protect. only happens when you have a child u love more than the world. what he did is irritating, but please go easy on him Wink.

you could talk to him about it (and i know you won't like the idea), but by bringing it up and discussing it, and letting him know that u're willing to answer (almost Grin) any question he has, he'll take your word more seriously

the same reason mutallab's father went to the FBI when it was already late

@2sleek,i saved up for it. I get a school allowance and i save from that. I copy notes for people in school for a price. I have a big extended family-someone's always giving me money,or crediting me,or paying my internet subscription or worreva. Like i said,airtime is not my problem. As for me and my mom,even though we butt heads a lot,its not like we're not close or anything-I'm just closer to my dad. We have more in common.

and this automatically equates being independent and self reliant lol kids

@OP
privacy,trust lol in your parents house? you seriously think that your dad at his age will trust a toddler like you and you seriously think you can be private in another man's domain
lol
these kids re getting ambitious by the day

_{you were lucky not grounded for a year}

I think I would rather not go through my daughter's phone at all for obvious reasons  A relationship is great when there is trust between both parties. My daughter and I would be great friends and we would virtually talk about everything so there wont be room to snoop around her room or her phone to find out who she gets in contact with and all that.


So no a father or mother shouldnt go thru his or her daughter's phone. Its not right if your daughter finds out you have been doing it she might decide to delete text messages or disguise contacts names on the phone. She might decide not to be open to you anymore. I wouldnt want that to happen between my daughter and I

^^bros, one of you had better go through your teenage daughter's phone.

all that one na long story, no offence.

@jp philips,nope-that equates being financially responsible and generally trustworthy. @Siena,you're making madd sense. . Ill bet you and your daughter will have a great relationship.

it is 4 your own good. i hope say he nor see the love text mssge him friend send to you sha?

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Really I don't see anything wrong. One if you have not to hid, text message pic or what have you. If you still under the "surveillance age group" then I strongly believe you still need monitoring.