₦airaland Forum

decatalyst:
You have got more than enough of my attention already!

Grow up and move on!

decatalyst:
If you may excuse me..., live your life the way you want!

It is onbvious we ain't on the same cognitive level. Tkcr!

decatalyst:
Nah sense of entitlement dey make people feel disappointed! In the corporate world, it makes employee to be stagnant because they feel the company should promote or give them insensitives because they have spent so much time at a position. They feel they should be compensated with a position for what they feel they have achieved even when it is clearly stated in the company's HR policy that all employee must pass through the laid down promotion process.

The message is that, you should do whatever you can for people without expecting anything in return.

If whoever you have helped choose not to return the favour, you can't coerce them to do otherwise. Besides, if everyone we have hurt decide to return the favour, I wonder....[s][/s]

decatalyst:
My brother May I humbly tell you that you have done something bad, by throwing the money back at his face.

The issue with you and most 'Nigerians', based on my observations, is this sense of "entitlement" that has percolated into our systemic existence.

Sorry to say this, no body owes you anything in this life. What you have or make is dependent on how well you work or desire to have them.

Your parents have done a very good job and you have also 'sowed' into making him a better person in life. I thought your joy should be that he can now fend for himself and be responsible in life.

My brother, it is left for him to show appreciation and probably integrate into your family.

Never offer help because you wish to get help back from the person in the future. If you do so, you just activated 'disappointment' and 'heartbreak'!

RickRansom:
I was schooling in the Western Nigeria at the time of this incident. One day I traveled to a distant city, and since the person I went there to see was not a church goer, I located a church around for Sunday service. During the service, their pastor or someone like that, who I didn't know anywhere before that day, singled me out of the crowd and said, "Don't put yourself under pressure looking for a wife. Your wife is nowhere near. She is in a very distant place, and you will travel to the place before you can meet her."

Before the actual prophesy, she said "You're not in any dating relationship and you live alone. Two people told you they wanted to start living in your apartment. Please, don't welcome them."

That is very accurate. I was living alone in a room. Two friends, who were also students, told me that they would start living with me the following semester because they wouldn't be able to afford their house rent by the time we resumed for the next semester.

But I'm not a student of that type of prophetic school of thought. So, I don't rely on the prophesy. But despite all my efforts, unmarried women kept disappointing me until I lost interest in dating. So, I no longer care about getting a wife. But my people are mounting pressure on me to get married. They then started arranging women for me. I'm handsome, and anywhere I go, girls and married women won't stop looking my direction. I'm very funny and fluent in English. After meeting those arranged for me the first time, they stopped talking to me afterwards, despite that they couldn't look at me in the face when we first met. But this is not so with married women. I can swear that two married women offered me sex of recent.
I'm 37, and tired of being not married. Is this prophesy the thing that is orchestrating my woes?

steph2sweet:
Pls matured minds in the house, i need an advice. I just got the shock of my life today. I got to know that the man I am planning to spend the rest of my life with has a child out of wedlock. I heard this from someone close to his family and I confronted him about it. He said he is afraid to loose me, that was why he didn't tell me about it. That he doesn't have anything to do with the lady that gave birth to the child for him, and that the lady is already married. I am just short of words.

phoenixthefirst:
Pep is a brilliant coach.

JasonScolari:
It has come to my notice that Some Mixed breed"foreigners" are dying to represent this shithole in sports activities. Check the senior National football team, the inflow of foreign players of Nigeria decent from last year till date is really impressive. Let's not forget that of recent, the Super falcons registered theirs as well in the person of Sophia. Also, the basketball team (Tiger's) are not left out. How about those beautiful ladies that represented this shithole at the just concluded winter Olympics in South Korea?

We're blessed with talented individuals but we're cursed with bad leaders.


God bless this shithole.

BleSSedMee:
Kudos girl! You made real sense.

This aso ebi thingy is nothing short of gross exploitation of friends 'pockets'


Someone was telling me the other day that hers is #80K. I calmly told her to take it elsewhere. Like what

prechbills1:
My fiance and I have been dating for the past 3years. I attained 24 last week, I wanted to get married to her last year but I just wanted to wait till I attain 24.
The problem I have now is my mom. She is opposing our marriage because my fiance is 5years older than me, I'm 24 while she's 29.My dad has already endorsed the marriage, I'd have liked to go on with the marriage but I don't think going into marriage without both parents blessing is sensible that's why I need my mom's blessing and endorsement.
My fiance has good character, she's very kind and intelligent, I can't afford to lose her because of pressures from my mom at least I'm an adult.
I don't know what's happening, my mom endorsed our relationship but she doesn't endorse our marriage just because she's 5years older than me. The thing is, I can't leave this lady ,not now not ever, she have done so many things for me.
in fact she even promised to provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage!. She is rich, yes she is, the house I'm in living in now belongs to her, I moved in with her in 2016.
The truth is I love her and I can't afford to lose her because of my mom's wish. Both her parents and my dad have given us go ahead for marriage but my mom still doesn't want me to marry because of age and my fiance is beautiful.
I don't know what do now ,that's why I think I need advice from you guys,.I don't know if I should go ahead with the marriage without my mom's endorsement/blessings.

please advice

TheUpsetGirl1:

I don't understand...

someone said the white gown symbolizes purity, chastity and virginity.

so someone who isn't a virgin can't use a white gown?

in western countries every lady puts on white gown whether virgin or not, so why is Africa different?? who even introduced milk gown


as for me I'm gonna use a white gown whether even though I ain't a vir...


what do you think

KOPT33:
I am the first son of my father who is now late.

When my father died some 11 years ago, I relocated to Lagos to finish my schooling. I lived with my aunt then but I had to leave their home because I was being abused. Upon leaving my aunt's house, things became so difficult for me but I persevered with my education till I finished my bachelors.

During my lean years, I fell out with most of my family members. My mom refused to speak to me for three years, I was essentially the outcast of the family. During this period, my mom and some elders in our family gave out my sisters hand in marriage.

The couple had a trad/white wedding. Bride price was paid, all the customs of our people were followed save for one: the consent or knowledge of the first son. I wouldn't get to hear about this marriage until six months later. That night, I cried because their action proved that I was nobody, a nothing to my mom and siblings.

Anyways, I kept on working hard and soon became comfortable. I mended fences with everyone in my family, but even at that, no one offered an explanation why things unfolded the way it did or an apology. I didn't make any noise, I just picked up myself and moved on after committing the lessons learned to mind.

Six years and two children later, my sisters marriage has hit the rocks.

Now they're asking me as the first born to mediate and talk to the man.

I REFUSED.

The man (sister's husband) won't speak to my mom or the other elders he had been dealing with regarding a possible reconciliation. My family know me to be a good mediator and peace maker and they are not wrong.

I refused because there is no point mediating in a marriage that was done over my head.

As it stands now, I have no interest in playing head of house or anything of such nature. I send money, I help make connections, I foot bills for everyone in the family but I leave their decision making to them since they discounted me right from the very beginning. I have no interest whatsoever in becoming a leader in that family.

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

boiz2men:
you must be a Catholic. Did I break your heart by stating the obvious? You must really think your priests are infallible. I'm sorry, that are not. They are humans not gods. Even angels came down from heaven to have sex with earthly women. How much less man that has blood.

If any catholic priests is celibate, he prolly touches himself.

You must be smart to call one stupid.
and with all your wisdom and smartness, you missed such a fact..


Didn't the Pharisees think they were holier than Jesus?

You feel smarter now. I'm not surprised.