₦airaland Forum

You blow hot and cold in a relationship to make it work, pushover doesn't work for most men. My friend that devotes every every to relationship is facing same fate you are facing now. The bible said " don't be too good, don't be too bad".

My husband doesn't take his off even though it's almost cutting through his skin and I don't take mine off as well. If the husband has excuses for not wearing his ring, i don't see why the wife shouldn't have reasons to take hers off too.


If the man rids his ring,the woman should rid hers too, after all the ring is not the marriage.

Ngokafor: ....You just spoke my mind!..abi you be spirit? ....

...at this point,i have got nothing more to say

Wetin else person go talk?

wolewill: @chaircover thanks for your advice. If not for herpes will I have stopped it? Definitely, because my mind has plagued me for sometimes and like I said it is just quiet unfortunate this happened because I guess this normally happened to people who are not genuinely into women I guess that is were the punishment is coming from. Unfortunately all this happened the week it was agreed with the friend to stopped the sinful act.
My repentance cannot be complete without the spiritual side of it. Well I dont know if this is the right decision, but I have decided to talk to my wife in the presence of my father in law. He is the only one that my looked up to a lot for strenght after God and me.
I hope he can help out. Base on your comments and people like babyosisi, beeevan, cococandy, soulglo, memyselfandI, Njideoby and some others I have clarity. I have decided to beg off from work the remaining days of the week to travel with the entire family to see him and lay this to rest. Or what do you people think.

I think you should speak to your wife alone without involving her father yet, traveling to get this sorted is a good purpose. God is your strength.

isokey: Abi ooo... With lots of STI's, viral herpatitis, genital herps, HIV and even Ebola fast growing in town now, they still reason with their brain below only to come back with pity stories. Ao i wish they enjoy its pleasure and nurse the consequential pain all alone.

That fact that they won't suffer alone drives me bonkers .

Cheating husbands be like " my wife is extremely jealous ", once they contract STD, their song will change to " i love my wife and didn't mean to hurt her.... am not that bad yadahh yadahh blah blah blah" .

So much for serving it up and down like ceremonial Kolanuts.

You don't philander but you caught herpes, am sure you caught it like Ebola. See what you have done to the poor woman in the name of marriage and you still have the guts to tell us that you are not that bad, you are exactly as bad as can be.

aflyingbird: yum!!!


i like!

Thanks

Yam

SAMBARRY: seconded. Wole will take this advice o.however if this story is true my prime suspect who is hiding as wole will will either be pickabeau, coogar, red Benson, shizzle or andyblaze.their waka waka to much

Lol! PB doesn't strike me as a wakabout but the Cat....

Just go and kill yourself already, i really feel sorry for the poor woman that was cursed with you.


May God protect the innocent from wakabout husbands like OP.

Let me know when he beats her to death, mtcheeewww !!

Better park your load now that there is only a kid to worry about or get your brothers to beat him black and blue each time he beats you, choose whichever option is convenient.

There is nothing like snooping in a healthy marriage. You are either hiding something or you are not.

edwife: Yes o,laugh wan kill me

How are you dear?

Am good sis, e no get wetin person no go read here.

Edwife you here?

There is nothing OK about phocking another woman 's husband!!change your set of friends, their heads seems very empty.

sihom: Me, I am delighted at all the responses and LOL but let's face it guys. Married men dating single ladies is a vice that has come to stay and I don't see it going away any time soon.

This karma thing most folks are talking about doesn't necessarily happen my sister's husband has cheated on her and gotten another woman pregnant yet my sister married as a virgin, she lived on the straight & narrow path until her marriage. How does karma come into play here?

My dad has also cheated on my mum more than once leaving behind evidence through the birth of my half sisters, as far as I know my mum has never cheated on him and she also married as a virgin, again I ask how does karma come into play here?

Now it seems people are of the view that if you date & sleep with a married man that will surely happen to you too when you get married but in my mum & sister's case how do you explain what happened?

If you ask me karma is overrated and it doesn't even play out the way most folks are carrying on here. I don't endorse what the OP is asking but I'm realistic enough to know this BS goes on and there's just too much hypocrisy about it and too many folks sitting on moral high horses on this thread.

The reason i don't believe in karma, deal with people as ruthlessly as they deal with you, no point hoping on karma that might or never come.

cococandy: Openly philandering men are dancing surugede.
But they don't know it is the dance of the gods.

Am sure any woman with a philandering husband must at some point wished he was dead so she can be free to get a life without being judged.

You don't know what he does for a living.

cococandy: Some will even kill the man if they can.
Which makes me wonder 'don't philandering men see the danger they are in?'
Some see it as the woman knows her place and knows she stands to lose if she leaves the marriage. That's what gives them courage to carry on.

They believe that women are used to being cheated on, at least some pack condoms into their husband's luggages to encourage him to keep it sheathed while prancing about.

carefreewannabe: Choosing not to marry is not the same as wanting to be a single mother, is it?

She made it clear that she will have 4 kids from 4 different men.

Minimum of ones a day, there is no day we haven't said that.

The cheat is solely on his own here, the blame is his and his alone.

I had a class mate that said she will never marry , she was only 15 then. She is still single till date, lets see if she changes her mind because she is still young for now.

If am that dude's father you will never be my DIL, you are too desperate!

chaircover: An old school mate of mine lost her husband. He was a serial cheat and in fairness to her, she had always been complaining about it.
He was actually in the car with a gf, when he had an accident that claimed his life in Nigeria.

When I heard the news of his death, I went to see her to sympathise with her, but when I got there and she had the sound system on and was listening to fuji

She was even the one telling me to cheer up and what did I want to eat and she was jisting about other things. It was like I was at a get together. I felt uncomforable and I soon left.

I thought that maybe she was in shock, but in hindsight she was probably fed up of it all and his death just bought closure for her.

its really sad though, that a relationship can turn go from good when it started to so bad that a spouse can loose his/her life and the other party just carrys on like its a simple thing

Can you imagine ? Most men have no idea how much they hurt their spouse by cheating, the hatred that comes with infidelity is twice as strong as the love that has been. I doubt if any woman will feel much pain if her husband died in a road accident while visiting his mistress. Their is no bad thing that a cheating spouse does not deserve. Due to the stigma on divorce in Naija, most will rather be widowed than divorced, so they pray fervently for their premature death.

babygirlfl: Women are fellow woman's worst enemy. Please women lets be kind to ourselves.

My dear you are still trying to excuse men for cheating with all these things you are writing. Life is not always straightforward. There are times in life when it is not possible to have sex with you partner even for months. How can a man who cannot stay faithful with a pregnant wife for some months stay faithful during these months. A partner who is unwell in hospital for months cannot have sex. Is it then right for the partner to cheat while their spouse is sick in hospital? Or in the case where they are away from each other for months e.g in different countries for some months because of work commitment. Is it right for a partner to cheat?

I believe control is key and that is what we should be preaching.

Another thing to know is that different women respond differently to pregnancy and even a woman that has been pregnant multiple times will tell you that each pregnancy was different. I expect you to know this as you a mother to three kids. I have seen a woman who was in hospital almost every week during her pregnancy. Do you think sex is on her mind? There is also something called pre natal and post-natal depression. Do you think a depressed woman is thinking about sex. Or do you think that it is right for her husband to go cheating on her?

Depression can also make such women unkempt. Another thing that can make a woman unkempt is lack of support from her husband. Men please support your wife. Do take some work off her so that she can have time to look after herself.

Just to let you know, your husband does not cheat because he is disciplined and does not want to. It has nothing to do with how you have kept yourself and how you still draw attention. We all know super models that their husbands have cheated on them.

Instead of making excuses for people, let us teach people to be more tolerant and more accommodating. Lets preach that people understand what for better for worse means and not to run away from situation when worse comes their way.

God bless you for this post, snazzy just know your man doesn't cheat because he doesn't want to, not because you are the sexiest woman he has seen around.

smokescreen4: true the death of a cheating husband should be enough relief my friend is soo pretty and sexy I know she will start dating soon she was always taking care of herself for her hubby her weight skin and all but it wasn't enough for the man, men cheating left right and centre like they own their lives, I will never shed a tear for a cheating husband, I go hang out with my friends and drink to celebration of life which will be starting for me.I HATE CHEATING I can't stress it enough

Totally agree!!!!it should be no other way, the death of a cheating husband should be a relief .

I feel sorry for women, umunwanyi erigo nsi Aboki na uwa

Seriously the people that gives this " pack Condoms" advise needs psychiatric evaluation. As far as an concerned, any man that plays the " you are snooping around card " is a cheat.



OP, there is nothing I won't do to stop that journey if I were you , absolutely nothing.

smokescreen4: Travelling to go and cheat hmm,he is not worried about endangering his life on the road, my friends hubby who cheats on her died July 14th, I think she is happy she is looking so good she went to the saloon last week to make her hair and nails I swear she has never looked this good it got thinking will I mourn man who cheats on me? Or will his death be a relief. I HATE CHEATING.

Mourning a man that cheats on you will be madness, the person should be window shopping already.