Uririandme:



Wow. This is awesome, but can one get the hcg trigger without prescription?

Thanks

Yes walk into any big pharmacy that sells fertility drugs. Alpha is ur easiest plug if u reside in lag. Worst case get any Dr or nurse to prescribe for u but not too sure its a biggie. We got several results from this protocol last yr and last two yrs in my foundation. Not sure anyone had issues wt getting d trigger nationwide.

inoki247:
Ok you dey destroy wetin u for resell and use generate income is the Stolen Fuel drugs or you people head no wan coret.....

Na dem dem, thief catch thief and quickly release statement to the press to show they are working. Who loaded the vessel at the terminals? Past 12 years to show it didn't start with this administration so what hav they been doing since not catching the vessel? Them wan show Tinubu say then dey work so publish names of those involved na. Yeye dey smell.

Pojomojo:
From DM

Let her take serrapeptease for 3 months and go for flushing. She will be alright. Occlusion means the tubes are blocked close to the uterus hence they were not visualized during d HSG. This type of blockage is easier to open than htdrosalpinx. Try what I just posted n thk me later

Bolt458:
I am not writing this for religious people to come with their funny talks, I am just putting this out here to hear from people who might have tried this methods or who heard about this methods and still proceeded or did not. I want to hear your experience. I have been dating someone for 5 years now, it happened that I began to see her as someone I would want to spend my life with. Last year we did our genotype test and we were both AS. Now , I know some of you will say this should be the first thing you ask when you meet someone but c’mon, would you say people in university that are dating now, would ask their sef that question? That theory is only feasible when you are single and ready to get married and want to start a new relationship, then you can always ask, but we all know some of our relationships started when we no Dey even see marriage in the nearest future, all of a sudden you just see them as the right person and you take the bold step. Now, I had to meet my family doctor here in Canada, I explained to him my current situation and he referred me to a GENETIC COUNSELOR. I am trying to take the necessary steps cause I am not ready to bring in a child with Sickle cell to this world, and I am not leaving anything to faith. A fone appointment was set with the counselor and we spoke at length. She told me that in every foetus, there is a 25% chance that we can get an SS child. Now , how do we mitigate this percentage to the barest minimum I asked as I am not even ready to bring in a sickler to this world. She gave me three options, I would rather say two because the last involves test when the baby comes, and that is out of the question.

Option 1:
A) CVS: They take a sample of the fluid in the womb through her vagina, at 12 weeks to test, if it’s good then fine, if not we have to terminate.

OR

B) At 16 weeks, they take the fluid using a needle directly from her womb, and if it’s SS , they terminate. Both procedures are cover by the government and we don’t need to pay a dime.

Now, she assured me that abortion is a very safe procedure if done properly, and it is even a bigger risk that one can die from a penicillin injection or carrying a pregnancy to term than any harm during an abortion.I know many people would come here and say abortion is this and that but let us be frank to ourselves. If you were told that the child in your womb would have cerebral palsy, or Down syndrome or a neurological disorder, would you still keep that pregnancy? Is there a 100% assurance that two AA people would give birth to a healthy baby? I have come to a realization that pregnancy is just a risk that people take, cus you really don’t know how your child would turn out.


Option 2:
PGD. This is just like IVF, where they would select the genotype before they insert back to the womb. She told me the government doesn’t cover this, and it could cost between $10K- $40k. However she mentioned, just like IVf, it is not guaranteed as it can fail and your money is gone.

I discussed this with my girl in Nigeria and she said she was fine with option 1a. I then asked her, that if the first, second are SS would she still remove it. She accepted. I would not lie to you, this girl is everything I want in a woman. I am not just looking at just love because I know love fades with time, but she is a really nice person, and has a good character. She has always been like this from my days in Nigeria because I was with her before I moved outside. Now after finding out our genotype, I tried to get into a relationship with AA. The first one Dey nigeria, she is a nice person, beautiful, but I just didn’t like her or feel attracted to her. She got tire and we just free ourselves, the second one is here in Canada, I just don’t like this one . Please note, I never slept with any of these ladies because I feel it’s not fair.


Now my question is for those who knew all this and still proceeded, how did it work out for you?

I repeat, don’t come here to tell me about how abortion is this and dat. Cus I know if they tell any of you that your child would be abnormal, 90% of you will go for the abortion

PGD is about 3 to 4m in Naija if u can afford it but the easiest way out is donor egg and gonfor IVF straight. Wt your 1m to 1.5m you can do IVF with donor sperm. She can get eggs from a relative wt AA genotype or just use annonymous donor selected by the clinic. Most people with AS issues that is what is the easiest way out instead of amniocentesis and abortion.

mbok:
Good evening everyone. Please who has used IUI to achieve pregnancy here. what's the success rate like . No money for IVF now. Hubbys SFA is 95 million count, total motility is 45% and normal morphology is 25%. I had hyper prolactin which is nomalized now. Please is it wise to attempt IUI. I'm 31

You can actually try what we call local IUI - DIY IUI using clomid or letrozole. Ensure u don't have fibroid or cysts before trying this out. IUI Doctors do in hospital and the one u do yoursef there's really no much difference except cost savings. First of all ensure your tubes are open, hsg can confirm that. On day 2-6 try any of the ovulation induction drugs I mentioned, day 10 do a scan to check egg size, day 12 do same likewise day 14, once ur egg reaches 20-22mm take hcg trig.ger and fire on. To increase ur chances u can add progesterone like duphas.ton from day of trigger then add prayer to seal up the deal while u continue to fire till like day 18 to be on d safe side then test from day 24-28. Many of my peeps tried this n got results. If u don't get result, allow ur body rest like 2 months before trying again as the recipe can still work up to 2 months without any aid. All the best.

2mercy:


https://leadership.ng/outrage-as-police-vehicle-runs-over-handcuffed-man-in-edo/

Police and lies. So an unarmed civilian going about his normal business can easily attack armed policemen on duty and injure them? Only God knows what this country is turning into. I washed that video and screamed seeing a driver running over a handcuffed human being. Na even women do this kain thing. Na wa o, which way Naija? Human life that cannot be purchased from the market.

jenifer007:


Honestly speaking you must be a very heartless person in real life.Why will you encourage a young man that's AS to go ahead with a partner that's also AS.Yes love is beautiful but that doesn't mean one should be stupid to fall into a life of regret

Even the bible made it clear that there's a way that seems right in the sight of man but the end is destruction.

And yes the other lady is right by saying separation is the only solution.

And it was unnecessary of you to attack her cos she asked a question about the egg removal procedure.

Whether you like or not children are part of the ingridents of marriage especially in Africa

If procreation wasn't necessary, God wouldn't have said we should be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth.

Marriage is first of all for companionship before children. In Africa u used as example don't they have men who abandon their families/kids to go live with strange women because they realized they were never in love with their kids mothers in the first place? Are children alone enough to make a man marry a woman he doesnt love? Why would a man abandon someone he loves for issues that hav medical n financial solution? You can as well say a man who realized his fiancee has blocked tubes or other fertility challenges before marriage should as well abandon her because of money he's going to spend on medical treatment because he himself doesn't hav any fertility issue. That is, why would a fertile man be bothered about marrying an infertile wife when there are lots of fertile women out there? Thats the mindset you guys have, forgeting a word called love truly exists. In all of this, I gave advise on different ways to still have their own kids, ivf with donor, natural with amniocentesis and ivf with PGD, not that the couple will remain childless. At least i proferred solution rather than walking away to marry someone he doesnt love yet you called me heartless . Odiegwu! Read all you have written again and tell me who is heartless between the two of us. Love conquers all my Sister except the man doesn't love her enough. I will not waste my energy to insult you and others calling me heartless but always pray in life that you or your kids, siblings etc don't find your/themselves in same situation where people are advised to run away from problems with ready made solutions. The Fiancee did not create hersef to have AS, reason God thru science has given Drs more than enough wisdom to handle all these problems yet Africans and their way of thinking . I rest my case sha, all man with his own. Try and check meaning of words like "heartless" before using it next time.

Elohorp:
it seems your a novice abi, have you gone through IVF process,have you spent money on this,I don't think so,if you have I think you will have enough sense not to advice 2 young people with no fertility problem to go on such a journey,na WA oh,you should keep silent,close your mouth if you don't have good advice don't just talk cause you feel like talking

Thank you Madam. Marriage for you is all about reproduction, giving birth and then what next? The kids grow up and leave and the man starts sleeping around because he realized he was forced to marry someone he doesn't love to avoid having kids with SS genotype for minor stuff that medical innovations can take care of. I haven't done ivf before so I don't kno the cost abi? Continue deceiving young people with your mentality n mindset. The guy has been advised so it's left for him to make up his mind and take a decision if he truly loves the lady in question but stop telling him there's no solution to the problem except seperation cos that is where you got it wrong. Someone who has not even done one egg recovery to kno if they put you to sleep or not during the process is telling me I don't kno the cost of IVf. You must be a novice in this matter and also this group. Continue with your archaic advice.

But how are these people kidnapped herdsmen? The heading sha

Lordsinger:
Hello house,
Good morning to you all.

I'm a guy in my late twenties, my girlfriend in her early twenties...
We really have a thing for each other, but we discovered we are both of the AS genotype.

Now my question is:
*Can IVF help us get children that will not have the SS gene?
*Can this be done here in Nigeria?
*Is it cost friendly?

Pls I need experienced answers on the above questions urgently, so that a man knows which way to go.
Gracias...

To avoid kids with SS gene, you can either do IVF with donor AA eggs or if u can afford PGD, she does the IVF with her eggs and before implantation they are checked to get the ones with AA and AS and transfer. This is actually the best option but expesive as cost ranges from N3m-10m. Or better still, she gets pregnant naturally and amniocentesis test is performed from 12-16 weeks to check the gene of the child. After which if SS you are given the option to abort bssed on medical reasons. But then how many abortions will you subject ur wife to if u keep getting SS (though very unlikely sha in most cases)? So ur very best, safest and cheapest option is IVF with donor eggs. She could get a relative with AA to donate for her or do annonymous with the clinic. These days most clinics have made the process quite seemless by getting donors that looks close to the mother. Some even show pictures which you can pick from so the choice is up to you if u really want to go ahead and marry her since you really love her. Just ensure you are conscious of your genenotype and take precautions early on all the choices available to chose from. Normal IVf with donor eggs, with your 1m in places like Abuja you are good to go. Above all praayyy. All the best with your choice.

Elohorp:
my advice,the both of you should thank God you found this out early and go your separate ways,I know she will cry and you will feel bad, because love is sweet bit I tell you there is no love when the battle will start,IVF is not a playful or joyfull thing,IVF is not an easy thing there is no sane woman that can get pregnant naturally and will choose to go for IVF, and no IVF is not cost friendly at all,me and my hubby are spending close to almost 2 million naira right now for only a circle,do you have that money to spend when you know you don't have a fertilty issue,your in your late 20 she early 20,avoid problem and avoid years of pain and heartache please break up and go your separate ways,to avoid had I know

What kind of advise is this in this modern age and time? Na wa o, its better to remain silent than mislead people o. Is breakup that easy?

Elohorp:
what is it even used for

It helps with implantation during ivf. A lot of people with failed cycle, this is about d only different thing some of them took to get result

Manny24:
I have Intralipid Infusion 100 ml, 250 ml and 500 ml. Contact me on 0-8-1-0-2-8-8-6-5-0-5 (call/WhatsApp) or email manuel.ezeagwu@gmail.com
Regards!

It's expired so u shd dash it out to those who need cos no sane company will sell these

ufondunenye:

Good evening mummies in the house. We finally met the doctor today, and according to him, all the tests I did, blood tests, hormones, kidney, liver, thyroid, pap smear, everything came out fine, the only thing I have is 2.3 cm fibroid which doesn't pose any threat.

Then my DH test, he prescribed fertilad for him to be taking for three months, then he will come back to repeat the test later. So we are holding on for the IVF for three months so we can know how far.
So please, mummies, is there anything I need to do or take while I await?

U can take cost science or quinol plus while waiting for your husband.

ufondunenye:
Wow! Good day mummies in the house. I'm glad I stumbled on this thread. Please, I need some advice here.

So, I got married in the year 2020, three months later, I took in, that was 2021 and lost it two months later. Since then, DH and I have been trying to concieve again but it's not forthcoming.

So this year, we decided to try IVF ,and we choose to use Garki hospital here in Abuja ( though I have started the process before I got to know about this thread.) .

So here's the thing, we were asked to do some tests, I have already done hsg and Sono in another hospital last year, so I was asked not to do it again in this particular hospital.
The findings on the hsg result were:
1) bileterally patent fallopian tubes
2) fibroids of 2.3 cm
3) poorly estrogenized endometrium.

My DH also did his SFA at Garki last week and the result came out as follows:
1) motility 10%
2) immotile 90%
3) morphology- abnormal- 100%
Normal -0%
Findings: sperm count within normal range, but with very low motility, poor morphology and lots of debris.

The hospital called me this week that my histology/ cytology results are ready, so we will be meeting the doctor by next week Tuesday to know the way forward.

So please, I really need help from you mummies, please explain my result and that of my DH own to me, what I'm I to expect from the doctor and what and what do I need to ask him when we meet on Tuesday.
Does anyone knows the success rate of IVF at Garki hospital. Please I need lots and lots of explanation, I don't know why I have been anxious ever since I got a call from them this week.
Please Blendy77 and other mummies help me out here. I'm 35yrs while DH is 41yrs.

Since your tubes are open, u may need to work extensively on ur husband's sperm before proceeding on the IVF or even try naturally. Can you think of any change in habit that may have caused his count to redhce drastically like this? Am sure ur Dr will advise u same. Maybe take like three months to work on his sperm while working on yoursef also. 100% abnormal sperm calls for serious cause for concern. Its even possible its what led to the miscarriage cos most early miscarriages like that happen as a result of chromosomal issues which cod hav resulted from poor quality egg or sperm or both. Change diets, habits, and get supplements. Let's kno what d Dr tells u at your nex appointment first then we take it up from then but don't rush into proceeding with IVF without tackling this issue except you are open to donor sperm. All the best

Timitoyo:
BA! BA! BA!

Praise the Lord as I welcome my baby girl at 7am this morning at the age of 45yrs, 3 months and 14 days via ELCS . She weighed 3.15kg

Big big congratulations

Godfavoritte:


Hi Blendy77, please sis how do I contact you. Please I need your help. Can you send me your email please sis

Ruonar2000@yahoo.com or u cod just use d DM or inbox option.

Find a way and come to Lagos. There's a Dr we use and his results have been proven to be effective but he's in Lag. Dedicate three days n come to lag to flush. Ensure you take serrapeptease and do castor oil massage minimum three months before u flush for effective result. All d best. If u need the Lagos Dr's number do DM me.

DownTime44:
Hi guys


Please i put up this post basically because of my elder brother. I sincerely want to know if i was wrong talking to him, or I could have just let him be. I wasn't myself ever since i talked to him, and i was somewhat having guilty conscience since then.


I have an elder brother, he's 38 years old and also the first son. I am the fourth child in the family of five. The second child is a female and she's married. We lost our third child, that's my immediate elder brother some years back, while i have a younger brother. I came from a humble background. Lost my dad while i was in JS 3, even before his death we had been hustling on a daily basis for survival, and we live happily as one big family. My mother, siblings and i do hawk daily before we could eat. All thanks to public school in Lagos, my family wouldn't have had the opportunity to basic education. We hawk daily after school, weekdays and weekend. My family was bred and brought up in Ajegunle.


Few years after the demise of my father, we struggled to pay house rent. We had to leave Ajegunle to a local and developing area. I didn't allow my family conditions deter or weigh me down. Never! I believe I'd make it in life legitimately without venturing into crime, fraud, theft etc. After my secondary school, i was into all sorts of labour work. I worked in factory, building site, cleared bushes, laundry man , just to save up and further my education. I worked for 6 years after my secondary school, bought a bike from the little savings i had and proceed to school through jamb. I gave the bike to someone who often deliver #6,000 weekly for the upkeep of my family. I was in year 2 when i let go of the bike, it was on a higher purchase and the agreement we have had elapsed. I hustled my way through school and graduated. I'm done with service last year but couldn't land a job, probably due to my age. I'd be 29 this year and most graduate trainee often request for age below 28. Although, i had a 2.1. I'm only managing in a pure water factory to make ends meet, keep soul and body together and support my family


I sat my elder brother down and talked to him. He has been hustling like every other person in the family but i don't understand what's happening. He didn't futher his education nor learn a handwork. He's 38 but still live under his parents roof. He has been doing conductor work for many years. The family had talked to him several times to look for something else. It's fine you are hustling as a man for survival but doing conductor for many years without thinking of what else to do is wrong. A family friend of ours who later got to know what he does for a living had advice him also.


The bus he was following, the driver had misunderstanding with the owner and he collected his bus back. My elder brother had been idle for months, doing nothing. He claimed he has gone virtually everywhere in search of bus he could be working with but couldn't get any. This is a family that we all had to bring something no matter how little to survive. I was talking to him as a younger brother. I asked him why didn't he heed to people's advice when they were advising him then to stop the conductor work and look for something to learn, if perhaps he doesn't want to further his education? He doesn't believe in Nigeria education, because he could count graduates without job or those with petty job. My elder brother wear almost rag as clothes. I had to give him some of my little wears I'm managing. He has just one slippers. We don't wear same size of shoe or sandals, we could have been sharing that also. He sold his phone to feed sometime ago and had been without phone. I was initially saving to get my mum a small phone but i had to give him the phone instead.


He was crying when i was talking to him. I understand the situation of things in the country, which i myself is going through. I was just trying to know what other things he could come up with. I am not happy seeing him sitting idle doing nothing. The fact that he's the first son and found himself in this condition at that age breaks my heart daily. My mum had been so worried about his condition. I had to convince her that things will be better. I don't want her to develop high Blood Pressure that could lead to her untimely death.


Please guys was i wrong talking to my elder brother?

The truth is everyone in the same family will not have the same hustling spirit. How can someone be doing conductor work at his age? A smart conductor would have learnt how to drive by now and either be driving for someone or driving his own bus or even doing uber business. That guy is not smart and you cant keep pushing him when he's not ready to change. Sit down with him and have a heart to heart talk. Ask him what can he do? If he loves transport business so much let him go and learn driving then you look for hire purchase car that he can use for uber. He can learn other handwork like sewing, barbing etc. You too while waiting for a paid job, look for other side hussle you can add. You were a hustler before you went to school, please dont stop in the name of looking for job because no one knows where this country is leading to. You can also learn driving and start uber business, buying and selling and other business to put food food on your table. You guys should try as much as possible to make your mum happy otherwise mere thinking of her kids alone can increase her blood pressure. It is well. Will try and send you a DM to know what you studied and how I can help. God who sees how far you have struggled will make things easy for you

Why do men value women who dont hav their time? U love someone when doesnt hav time for you because of her shop even on weekends. So when u marry do u think that will change? Instead of u to love the one that has ur time you are here confused. Maybe state what and what you u want in a wife, score both women and go for the one wt the higest score. If caring, has time for me and very fertile are part of ur criteria, u hav a wife material already

Softprecious:

At lily clinic warri,is there any particular doctor I should ask for,one with good record of successful transfers??

That i wont kno but the clinic does ivf so u cam walk in and ask. If u dont mind travelling, Primecare Abuja is the latest bride in town. Cheap ivf plus high success rate

U are better off with keeping it a secret except you want to live a lonely life at old age. You already trained them and from the write up they are all doing very well. The only other person who is aware that could have spilled the news is already dead so forget the past and move on with your kids. You can remarry for companionship to enable you forget the past but telling your children this at this age, honestly they have nothing to loose cos they are already made but u hav everythg to loose including your biological daughter who must have formed a bond with her siblings all these years so itd best you just let sleeping dogs lie. It is well with some women n infidelity sha, tufiakwa!!!!

Softprecious:
both name of doctor and good place for ivf but am in warri I need recommendations around warri and ughelli

Try Lily Clinic Warri or Marviscope in Benin.

beesan:
Please, which hospital is good for ivf in kaduna and their prices.

Try and go to Abuja, Primecare Fertilty Hospital at Garki. Most people from Kano and Kaduna that I know, its where they used and got results.

Trippletripplet:
I want to give 10 gwoza for all mothers trying to conceive,keep moving, one day you will look back and realised you are an over comer.please I want to ask if it is possible to adopt a frozen embryo.those left that the parents don’t want to use again.it is possible.

Its very possible if the intending parents hav given permission for it to be adopted out. Unfortunately in Nigeria most people prefer to discard rather than adopt and most clinics wont adopt without permission cos they can be sued.

beesan:

Sent you a message, but didn't get your reply.

I responded o. Pls check

UyaiIncomparabl:


Can you give a clue about the price, please?

Not less than 2m cos it depends on ur treatment plan and age. I posted because you said you are not concerned about the money but quality amd success rate. Send him a chat 08032011536 and he will get someone to send u their price chat, if u mention from NL you might get some discounts. If u are willing to travel to Abuja and use Primecare's Dr Ese, you will spend far less than that amount less thn 1m and he's one of our best for now. For Lag Emeka still remains one of the best.

UyaiIncomparabl:


Thanks. It’s the track record I’m concerned about, not even the price.

Do Olive Branch Lekki if u can afford Dr Emeka. They are one of the best in Lagos. I had my twins with them

mbok:
Please who knows the total cost of IVF in national hospital Abuja? What about university of Benin teaching hospital? Is IVF also successful for a 32 year old TTC lady? Please reply

I dont kno cost of ivf in these places but ivf at 32 is a very good age cos ur amh at this age shd be very ok except there are other issues. To achieve a successful ivf is not by age alone, u need to ensure ur uterus is free from obstacles like fibroids, polyp, adenomyosis, bulky and too tinny lining. Ensure ur tubes are either open or completely blocked from the proximal or uterus side cos if its open n blocked at the fimbrai or ovary end, fluid from the tubes can affect implantation so Drs now do a procedure called salpingectomy to block d tubes completely to increase ur chances. Ensure ur hormones are balance espcially prolactin, as this can affect d quality of eggs if very high. Finally ensure ur husband's sp.erm is ok, this includes count and motility. These and many more are the reasons Drs conduct comprehensive tests before embarking on most IVF procedure except u are a returning patient. All the best

beesan:

Please can I PC you about this?

Yes you can ruonar2000@yahoo.com

ecolime:
Useless mother. Send her to jail ASAP


It is only in Nigeria evil doers justify their acts of wickedness. Some morons have started saying "Eh yah"

Expect fools to start donating sympathy money for her.

The father is not useless for not helping his wife offset the loan abi? Where was the idiot when the wife was hawking pour water to pay loan? I didnt see u address that because you be man too abi? Her actions are wrong but if she had normal human being called husband or father of her child by her side none of this would hav happened. That is if he wasnt the useless man who set her up sef and decided to report to the police because he didnt get his share of d deal

BrighterThanDay:
As a child from a broken home, I saw marriage as my happy ending of finally having a home filled with love and mutual understanding. After the death of my mom, growing up with my dad and stepmom was hell. I was treated as a stranger in my own home, so I thought starting my own family will be a lot better.

After I completed my education and got a good job. I had a lot of suitors willing to settle down with me. Most of them were rich and accomplished men, but there was no spark, I felt they weren't genuinely in love with me, and since I was never a materialistic person, I turned them down. I get easily content with what I have and I spend prudently. Then I met my husband. It happened that I was his crush back then in school, in fact, he even approached me as a student then, but I turned him down because I knew where I was coming from and I never wanted to gamble with my studies, it was my only hope to leave my father's house and fend for myself.

Fast forward to when I met my husband after school. He didn't even have a good job. But I could tell I meant a great deal to him, we'll speak for hours on the phone. I fell hopelessly in love with him, I could already picture a happy home with him and our kids. Then he proposed, and I accepted. I met his family, they were nice on the first visit.

After the introduction ceremony with my family, I started noticing certain things. I was taking pictures with his phone when I saw a message from his mom telling him I'm a stranger and he shouldn't allow me to come between them. I was surprised and wondered where all this was coming from, I asked him and he reassured me that it was nothing.

Then his father told me that hope I know that a son should love and care for his parents more than his kids. I kept pondering this statement. Then the worse of it all was his married sister, she hasn't even met me, but she rained insults and abuses on me on his phone and why he needs to make money first and allow his family to enjoy his money, before getting married. She said I was old, and just forcing him to marry me. I was just 26 then, but my education was very fast.

I had to speak to her dad about this and he cautioned her. I tried speaking to her myself but she rained insults again on me. I called off the wedding at a point but my then-fiance begged and involved my brother and so we went on with the wedding preparations. The wedding went well and his entire family stayed with us for a week before leaving.

My husband got a good job, I was working, we were fine and money wasn't our problem. A few months later, my father-in-law died. I sent messages and called hubby's siblings to comfort them. I couldn't travel with him immediately due to the nature of my job. I kept calling to check on him and inquire about the traditional rites I might need to be a part of. Hubby said his father was a pastor so he won't need to do anything, while we were yet speaking, his sister who hates me snatched the phone from him and said I have to do this and that or I should pack my things and leave the house and then she shouted at me.

I was so pissed and acted in a way that wasn't right considering that we were all mourning. I sent a message to her, telling her to be nice considering that we are all mourning but if she chooses to continue insulting and humiliating me for no reason, I won't take it. She forwarded the message to the entire family, including uncles, aunts, and grandchildren. On the day of the burial, I was treated as an outcast by the entire family, she told them not to give my birth family food, even though they came bearing gifts and comforting everyone. Hubby had to step in and ask the caterers to serve them.

She kept fighting and shouting at my hubby throughout the burial and tried denying him of things he was supposed to do as the first son and child. I was humiliated and she kept castigating my name and insulting me to hearings of everyone. I wasn't even allowed to eat. I was quiet all through, when family members were asked to sit behind the corpse, she asked me to excuse them.

For fear of my life after the burial, I had to go lodge in a hotel outside. The next morning she and her brother kept shouting and complaining that why did hubby allow me to lodge and that I should have been with their mom. They continued the humiliation, I couldn't take it anymore or hold back my tears so I left.

Hubby later told me that she held a meeting in my absence with the entire family and told them I'm a bad wife and needs to leave her brother. This was when hubby stood up for me and said I wasn't going anywhere.

Our marriage was never the same. Even when we had our daughter, no one called, hubby was ostracized from his own family and he blamed me sometimes. I couldn't concentrate at work, and my job is performance-based. I was scared that I'll be fired, so I resigned.

Hubby's income wasn't enough to sustain us, so we started facing financial difficulties. He had to even go meet the same sister to borrow money, even though I discouraged it. She always mocked him for it and I had to pay off the loan at a point.


When she saw that we are now broke, she stopped fighting with him and they are on talking terms now, of course, she still wants nothing to do with me. I know that they are family by blood and nothing is too hard to forgive, but each time she calls and they are happily discussing, Ican't help but feel angry for all she has caused us. I'm sometimes tempted to leave this marriage because this is not what I envisaged at all.

My brother is also married and I have never felt the need to interfere in his marriage or fight his wife.

I don't know how long I can continue in this union, even my innocent beautiful daughter is hated by them.

The fact that u hav a supportive husband is all you need. I think you are giving these people too much credit. If a family doesnt like u my Sister face front and face your husband. Infact stay very far away from them before the physical hatred turns spiritual. How can a SIL tell caterer not to serve your family at their father's burial? Irrespective of what you hav done, thats witchcraft of the highest order. U sef no try, knowing the kind of people they are, you shd hav made Provision for your guests cos same people would hav complained if u didnt invite anyone. Abeg avoid them and face your husband and kids o. You guys should should live within ur means and stop meeting them for help, that's the height of 'see finish'. Try and get a job or business so you can be financially independent. The Sis will come around with time if she wants to but if she doesnt want to abeg avoid them. Who wicked and nasty SIL epp? Its ur husband you are married to and if after a child they still dont want to accept biko bone them and face ur husband and ur marriage. Just stay very far away from them till they come around. They hav seen u as very soft hence all these nonsense. They wont try it with you if u are mean like them so better avoid them and stop trying to force friend where it doesn't exist with them if they wont accept u. Bettomline make money my Sister and build love and peace in ur marriage, thats all u need for now not bitter souls around u. Imagine resigning from a well paying job cos of extended family issues. U no try at all