₦airaland Forum

DoggoneDogg:
I only have a heart for the kids. The widow can go to hell cuz she is the heartless one here.

Widows and the fatherless. Not one or the other. Both.

DoggoneDogg:
I will leave you here...

Have a heart at least for widows and the fatherless. Thanks.

Humanoid01:
You are right, but I believe he made a good point by making a case from her late husband's income and her not having any sufficient means to support him.

Everything you said is true, but factors such as this cannot be overlooked in family planning. Some predicaments can be avoided by simply weighing up the pros of a decision against the cons. Unfortunately, this is something the woman and her husband didn't consider, unless there's more to the story that we don't know about.

All in all, I do not support the aggression, but his points should serve as a lesson to the lot of us.

Who said the late husband's income was not enough for them when he was alive?

Even the best of plans cannot be fully actualized. What if they agreed to begin it rough, save up and improve? Not everyone can plan their lives before it happens. Some in her situation are able to make it out. All it needs is time and commitment. She didn't get that when he died.

Now we have a woman ready to stick it out with a guy who had "nothing", and even men are calling her all manner of names. Interesting.

I will disagree with him because initially I thought these people had no plans, and were wicked for having many children, but after some outreach I got to know that they do. But life isn't fair to everyone. They are humans too. Some of them don't plan, but majority do. It just doesn't work out for them.

DoggoneDogg:
[s][/s]

Leave future and answer my question.

Even if the husband did not die, is 48k good for a single man not to talk of man & wife??
Only for the two idiots to go ahead on a fucking spree till they had 4!! Still on the 48k

What's your excuse please??

Who told you the 48 thousand was not enough for all of them?

Humanoid01:
I don't think she was wrong for bringing her plight here. In every situation, there will always be people who will choose to be apathetic and just talk without considering the other person's feelings.

The good side of it is she has access to a wide range of ideas and opportunities to help her get out of her current predicament. She just has to learn to sieve out the positive comments and ignore the bad.

However, the comment you highlighted isn't essentially a bad one, it has some truth in it. It was just too sharp and lacking consideration for the subject's emotions.

Her husband died. That was never in their books, but it happened.

To blame her for having children in the past when we only knew he would be dead now is simply unreasonable. They may have had plans on how they would move on with their lives and grow. She was not complaining before.

I get that we all think we are wise and won't have children until we have billions in the bank, but reality is quite different. We're all humans, the widow is human. There's no perfect time to do anything.

The truth is that all that hate and pointless agression isn't helping the widow.

DoggoneDogg:
Oh please.

So even if the husband was alive, you're saying 48k is good for a family of 6??

Are you okay??

I never said it was okay, but best believe they didn't plan to live like that forever.

You act as if they were happy with that and wanted to live on 48 thousand for the rest of their lives. Wasn't the man going to get promoted promoted?

Give it a rest. If for nothing, she's a widow and didn't plan for her husband to die.

DoggoneDogg:
[s][/s]

On 48k income abi.

The Nairaland widow & her late husband must be MAD.
I have no sympathies to waste here... nonsense



Inshort, if I catch her right now I go beat her die!
What rubbish!! You gave birth to FOUR kids and your husband's income was 48k & yours zero??

What happens to those kids now? Abuse, sexual molestation, suffering, trafficking, maltreatment, killed dreams etc... all because of their h0rny and sexually irresponsible parents.

Thunder fire this naraland widow.


Make dis tin just be fiction now cuz my blood dey hot

He didn't plan to always earn 48k.

And please, stop insulting the widow. You don't understand what happened to her, it's not your place to condemn her for having her and her husbands plans cut short at his demise. Because they didn't have money amounting to the billions you think every married person must have, they shouldn't have each other or a child?

Have a heart. Most of you who talk like this are probably under 25/30 and think you know everything about life. You don't.

Nobody knows the future. You can plan and achieve so much and lose it in a day.

Have sympathies for her. She got married, she didn't commit a crime. It's not her fault. Why on Earth would anyone turn so much anger and hate on a widow? Put yourself in her shoes.

I would blame her for bringing her issue to a forum for immature men to condemn and abuse her needlessly.

Whether or not you take the vaccine, you can still get covid-19.

Bifwoli:
But surely on pic #4 that lady named Oke doesn't look like she's under 20yrs of age. This is age doping.

What of the Namibian man running with the women? Isn't that sex doping?

tensazangetsu20:
How can someone with a working brain have four fucking children

Why not?

People can have as many children as they please— provided they plan to have that many and have a life plan for the children and themselves.

Sometimes unpredictable things happen and it seems like a poor decision. But there was once a plan.

cococandy:
I’m literally staring wide eyed at everyone advising her about how she’s tolerating his abuse but many of them will turn around to support ideas and schools of thought that breed women like her who end up with such a deep need to man-please that they lose all sense of self (no offense honestly intended).

But like how can they dissociate themselves from the cause and effect that’s obviously playing out right in front of us?

Even in her state, she still has stuff to say about feminists. When all they really want is for her to choose her own well-being over the excesses of any man whether it be society wise or relationship wise.
I just can’t.

She’s publicly calling me out that I refused to respond to her emails (just negodu) . My sister I helped when I thought she needed help but now I don’t believe she needs help. There’s nothing I’ve got to say that’s not feminism inclined and she doesn’t roll like that. What more can we do? Am I supposed to feel bad now or what? Or feel guilty? I don’t get why she’s doing this.

I wanted to ignore that mention as well but I recognize it for what it is. Some sort of guilt trappings like we are folks who owed her something but failed her.

Under certain circumstances your post would be terribly amusing, @calling you out. But we are actually reading from two very strange humans: one semi-animal, the other almost zombified. Two— for lack of a better word— psychopaths. You even tried to help her, but it's getting obvious what she needs help with is how to get back with that man. He's her oxygen.

That she has strength to fight feminists from her sinking pseudo-marriage remains a thing of amusement. At this point in time, her greatest desire is to be a good and submissive woman. Which is one of the reasons she and the man were back between the sheets without a second thought in a building they have not paid the lease on. Which brings us back to the key question: what is her point?

With all the advice, even from the police, are we still dealing with a normal person? Or did the boyfriend use a spell on her?

He should come and carry her. Their unending situation is becoming more of a format for something only the two of them understand best.

It seemed like a joke when people said they were after money, but it's plain to see that that is one of the side attractions to this daily update.

Nobody should feel guilted by the two of them. Narc and supply.

@bold: You couldn't have said it better.

AmazonTopaz:
This woman doesn't learn, since you have refused to have sense what more can we do for you

Stop bringing your problems to nairaland since you are not ready to heed to any advice

The funny thing is that all this is a sex attachment at best. The fear to be a woman on her own, if need be at worst. The need to be submissive because it shows she's a good woman, even when being beaten publicly from one house to the next. Many good women are in the grave. The worst they will do is parade him, and his guys on the forum will go: what did she do to turn him into a beast, stupid asewo, she was not a good woman, she enjoyed it, etc.

Both of them have deep issues. They are like two magnets that can't be separated. He's a narcissist and she's his supply.

If that isn't the case, then both of them are in some kind of forum game.

The latter is more likely.

damosky12:
When will we learn that this is unAfrican?

Trying always to copy the Western ways is not sound. You don't have to propose in a public place or go on your knees. How's this difficult to know?

Besides, marriage is a private affair. Trying to compel the other party into a union like that by proposing in public is the reason why many modern marriages fail. Saying yes or no should be upon sombre moments of deep thoughts...

But it isn't unAfrican to hold a phone and type about un African things?

People will continue proposing the modern way. Those who don't like it should go back to the village and enjoy Africanness.

Fake proposal.

jesusjnr2020:
Scriptures That Prove A Woman Who Is Born-again Is The Equal Of A Born-again Man

Galatians 3:27-28 (KJV)

For as many of you as have been baptized into Christ have put on Christ.
There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.

This first one is from apostle Paul. One thing I love about him is that he always has a way of righting his wrongs in the course of his teachings. Here he spoke the Truth about those who are born of the spirit, there are no males or females, for they are all equals.

John 3:6 (KJV)

That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.

This one is from Master Jesus and it corroborates the one from Paul, because it's only those who are born of the flesh that have gender. Those born of the spirit don't, because they are spirits not flesh. So there's no inequality among them.

Matthew 22:30 (KJV)

For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven.

This also from Jesus speaks of the life those who are born of the Spirit begin to live here on Earth, even the life of the Spirit as it is with the angels in heaven, so there's no male or female among them, for they are all the same.

John 1:12-13 (KJV)

But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name:
Which were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.

Now this last one is my favorite of them all, and no surprises it came from my favorite apostle, John, the brother of James, who happened to be Jesus' favorite as well.

It says not just men, but whomsoever, including women, that have received Christ has been given the power to become a son of God. So when a woman become born of God and of the Spirit, she also becomes a son of God, and sons are equals, so there's no inequality among them.

God bless.

Keep shining the light on little-preached truths. Let it not be said that they never heard it or saw it.

Just like they said TVs and Facebook are devilish paths to hell.

Guess who's being streamed across various screens?

Wonder who still listens to pastors.

keepingmum:
Ok, so what do you want from us in clear terms?

Cos updating this series isnt necessary without any goal in sight.

- do you wany money to move out again or to complete ur rent?

- your post suggests u would be willing to reconcile with ur partner if he pays your brideprice which then makes me wonder, why you want to leave him?

Are you just leaving because you dont want to stay with someone who hasnt paid your brideprice or because he isnt feeding or housing you? Which is it?

You cant continue to involve nairaland and the police without being firm and honest to yourself and the public on what you actually want.
Remember what you need has to be practical, achievable and perhaps requires compromise from both of you.

Forget about advising her. It's a perpetual cycle.

She is hoping he will come back to his senses—believe it. In fact, the next step is to accuse anyone who advised her of being a household destroyer, and she's gradually working up to that with her recent posts.

Every twist and turn in the story is beginning to look scripted. It will end in vigorous intercourse and more posts at a later time.

This particular woman believes in enduring in marriages, and even though she is not married, she is sticking out her neck to remain with the man by all means. She's not worried he could beat her to death, she's more interested in being in love him/his violence.

They have fought numerous times, according to her he even threw her out, and after struggling to get a place to lease, she's suddenly being beaten by him in her new place? What happened to his old place?

Why should the man be evicted? How does he know where she lives? Who invited him into the house? What have they been doing together in the house since he arrived? Doesn't he have a job, apart from dropping oily takeaway packs in her bin? Why is he suddenly a fixture in her new house? If he was not invited, how did he get there?

There are a lot of absurdities in the story, a lot of things unsaid. It is true she has been cohabiting with a woman batterer, but if she didn't like it, he wouldn't be back in her house.

emzynuel1:
Basically local woman mindset
All u want is to receive love and care without giving shit
U must have forgotten d law of equivalent trade
Am fucking tired of all dis pseudo moralistic individuals

Typical local broke male mindset on display, always exhibiting a lack of civility in interactions.

All they want is a dish cloth who will fall to their feet as if they are heaven and Earth, while they are empty within and have nothing to give, be it love or care.

We're all so tired of their false moralistic approach to anything to do with women. Women this, women that. Why are you still thirsting after women?

tensazangetsu20:
It's people having children here I pity. In the future children will kill their parents for making them Nigerian citizens.

This is way too fatalistic.

truthsayer009:
You do, you actually need to be old to have legitimate money. You women don't want to be realistic, that's why you prefer those scammers.

Except you are born into a wealthy family.

Please explain to me how a guy who graduated at 24, served at 25 has 100Million in his account. Even as someone who deal in Crypto or Alaba business man, it takes years to grow your money. Save and invest, rinse and repeat.

Apart from Tech start up owners like Mark Zuckerberg, Iyin of Andela, Shola of Paystack. How many common 20 year olds have made it who aren't from rich homes.

The average pay for graduate in Lagos is 150k, Shell workers will earn around 1.5M to 4M, how many 20 year olds are working in Shell?

Women will keep deceiving themselves.

You don't need to be old to have money legitimately.

Different folks, different strokes. Men don't want to be realistic, that's why they thoughtlessly become criminals to impress women, then somehow blame the women for their actions. Sorry, did she hold a gun to your head to make you a criminal, or was that always your disposition?

When it comes to women wanting scammers, you know best. That broke Nigerian men's anthem is getting old, though. The one where they claim all women are after is money.

Most Nigerian men have terrible characters. They spend so much time judging women while their characters are in shambles and their ego is too big. These are the things that chase females from them when they are broke or have money. When you have nothing except money to offer, who will want to stay with that? No good character, no emotional connection, nothing good except money.

There are enough under 25s working in Shell, but they don't exist, apparently. Whether their parents are rich or not is of no consequence, because they exist contrary to your assertions. Just like your assertions about women will be contrary to the truth.

This was always the game.

They are right there and don't want to give their kids water. They just sit back, some with their own water, and chitchat.

What should be done with these propaganda images?

They left the women and children behind, while they ran aboard.

truthsayer009:
These women will still ensure they marry the man for stability, then divorce him later if need be. Some don't even divorce but just continue for the sake of kids.

From personal experience Nigerian women date fraudsters Yahoo+ boys, during this period they pray they find a legit man to steal them away from their current situation but some don't get that convinient opportunity.

The reality is that women want the good life, fast cars, paid vacations and the only type of men who can provide it at their early age are men of questionable characters. Except you want to date 40+ old men in your early 20s.

That's why women like Nina, Tania Omotayo, Nengi etc settle for fraudsters, character doesn't pay the vacation, money does.

As much as there are women who like the easy life, the men they follow also like the easy life otherwise they wouldn't be criminals. But while we criticize them —men and women —who on Earth really doesn't want the easy life? Who doesn't like money? Who wouldn't want to be rich or have a rich spouse? It's not something limited to women only, because there are men who want the same thing but prefer to point at women while concealing their own desires.

But at the end of the day, money can't hold a relationship together. It is character that does. Even the richest man in the world was an awful husband and got divorced at the end of the day, due to his inability to be a man for his family.

Plus, you don't need to be old to have legitimate money. It's a common misconception that makes many men get into fraud.

theForth:
And the same women will say that broke men deserve no pussy even when has a great personality.

Abeg make we hear word.

Broke men with bad personality are hated openly. When they get money, they still keep the bad personality and are hated secretly. Therefore, they are still being divorced.

Why? Deep inside they aren't men of value and have not improved their characters. A rotten apple will always be a rotten apple.

Get all the money in the world, if your character is rotten, the woman will still go.

That you think it's all about pussy says a lot. Even the woman you think doesn't know anything will know that's all you're after and will bolt at the most convenient opportunity.

lonelyisland:
You know, at a time she couldn't stay any longer.
The pressure was much, she was loosing her mind.
We said it was us against the world, but she couldn't fight the world again.
Families were disturbing her for money, money was no where to be found.
What she doesn't know was her courage was what was pushing me forward, it was just what I needed to forge ahead.

At a time, I too was loosing it but she came with a strong vibes and aura which kept me moving.
She left, but her courage and strength is still there.

My advice to young guys please have money before you venture into a relationship, she might stay but you still need the money to keep it going.

Relationships/marriage are like old cargo trains that uses charcoal to function. You have to be ready to give in something. I don talk my own finish ooo

Most of you don't work on yourselves. You think money is everything. The P-square man with a lot of money (even Bill Gates) was divorced by his wife.

If money were heaven and Earth in a relationship, they wouldn't be divorced. Most of you men in Nigeria have convinced yourselves you need money to buy over a woman, forgetting that you cannot buy emotions. And you don't want to know the truth in that regard, except sweeping generalizations. Get all the money in the world —but don't change yourself and no woman will stay.

This is what happens when men neglect true development and believe money will sort out their character and beliefs.

Fountainofyouth:
Prove it that you know me na, from Ibadan to Lagos, show it na,

Dan iska, kin chi kanianka wallahi, tsinnanu kawai.

Take it easy on the teenager that's been quoting you.

eyinjuege:
Paul wasn't only sleeping with their maids, but also different IG slay queens.
Another woman is pregnant for him
He beats Anita steadily.
Anita is from a very good home, well educated and a very easy going simple woman. She no dey like drama, she minds her business. She was there when he still had tolotolo long neck with nothing and she stuck with him then.
She has been enduring all this while, but if he seems unrepentant and even tells her to do her worst, what exactly is left to salvage in the marriage?
A marriage can only work if 2 people are on the same page.
Paul aka RUDEBOY listens to nobody, so there's even nobody to advice him to try to salvage what's left of the marriage.
What is the wife supposed to do in such a situation where she stays miserable. Should she live in misery for life?
Some marriages will make you contemplate suicide or even murder. If it reaches that stage, best to waka.

How do you people know he beats her? Or that someone is pregnant for him? And the maids?

Are you related to them or any of their staff? Tell us more about them, because the man is beginning to sound like a tyrant/useless man.

LMAO. Is he the cause of it?

The frequency of bizarre topics on Afghanistan is amusing.

TOPCRUISE:
Why should a case be transferred. When a criminal case is been transferred here and there then it shows that Nigerian police are incompetent.

What of cases like that of the Ini Umoren serial killer that nobody hears anything about?

EmekaA125:
Sleepy, demented, senile and old Joe. This Ezi bida will soon shift blame to Trump.

He already has. But everyone is willing to sweep his numerous indiscretions and temper outbursts under the carpet and try to make sense out of his double speak. Why? Well, His name isn't Donald Trump.

Now it suddenly isn't the president who makes decisions. What a world. A man who ignored and lied about the state of things. Even if he bleeps up his own country, there will be some excuse for it and all will be forgotten. Even though he's worthy of impeachment, his left buddies want to hang on to power by all means. Well, he's forgiven. His name isn't Donald Trump.

Let's hope they don't spread from their enclave in the East to the rest of the world, because enough is never enough. A new branch will open in Nigeria soon. If this happened under Trump the insults, condemnation and headlines would be much, much worse. Pelosi would be tearing papers and acting treasonable.

Politics is the most useless activity in the world, worldwide. Give your enemy a bad name, and when it's your turn, do similar and find a way to claim you're right when you are wrong. Like Trump like Biden.

proclinician:
Ok u have many gfs, she said no problem. U used ur Benson and Hedges cigarette penls to have intercourse and it felt wide and you're calling her public toilet? U which public u come be. This story na cooked up lies BTW

Public toothbrush. That's why he found cleaning the "toilet" difficult. What can a toothbrush do inside even a cup?