₦airaland Forum

Experienced with Jobs. So the fact you already said you don't like the current is enough reason to switch. You don't want to wake up dreading where you are going to work.

However, you should be sure of the prospects for growth truly where you are headed, will there also be possibilities that your pay will be reviewed after specific and Clear time frames? Ask these questions. If not, be ready to also put a time frame for how long you'll be at the new job and when you'll move using it as a stepping stone. Good thing you know the worth of your skills and in tune with how you feel. Many people just live on auto pilot.

Your field should be paying you in 6 figures by the way 100k is even small.

In other news Toyota Camry Pencil Light. Car in perfect working condition. Available for inspection at Garki 2, ABUJA. AC working perfectly. Automatic. Body parts neat and in good working condition. Engine in good working condition, very quiet. Pick and drive. Registered with complete papers. Going for 1,350,000 (Negotiable)

Quit soda. It's slowly killing. Health issues don't just arise, it's small every day actions.

Your body is the only place you have to live in.

In other news.
Toyota Camry Pencil Light. Car in perfect working condition. Available for inspection at Garki 2 Abuja. AC working perfectly. Automatic. Body parts neat and in good working condition. Engine in good working condition, very quiet. Pick and drive. Registered with complete papers. Going for 1,350,000 (Negotiable)

SensualMan:
This one wants to solve all generational problems at a swoop with the sale of one abused car

kikikiki! How cheap are you that a paltry sum can solve your generational problems?

While you are making noise, some people are actually negotiating. Abused car because it once belonged to you and you abused it abi.

There's wisdom in moving along when you don't have something worthwhile to say. It's 2022 grow up. But then with a moniker like that, your thinking is probably always in the gutterz.

Charisma01:
1.350 for pencil light?
Brightgem you're not bright at all.

if you say so. Atleast you can see negotiable there

NO LONGER AVAILABLE

In continuation of 30 Days of Content for Men we asked Guys what they think on how Men ought to show up for each other. Below are their thoughts.

A man is a creature with flesh and blood and he has a soul, he has a mind, he has a heart and he feels pain, he understands pain, he cries on some days, there are some days he needs hugs. Unfortunately, most of these are what we are expected to give to the female folks. Showing up for a man that has an issue by a man is a less discussed topic. I used to have a friend, we became friends because we could relate on certain plain of intellect. Fast forward to some point, I will go visit him and he will insist that we hug, I will be like guy... I don't understand, but he would always insist. I suspended whatever funny thoughts I might have, like “common we are humans.” There are health or psychological implications of hugs like that. A man also cries and there are days when he will need comfort and he needs solace as well. We men ought to show up for our fellow men as we are in fact the ones who can relate to what other men are going through.
OLISA BASIL NNODIM – IT and Multi-Media Professional.

Men should learn to show emotional support to their fellow men. There are men who are traumatized from abuse but because of how society has labelled men as warriors, Men hardly share their feelings and pains. Men should have accountability group of men who can show up for them when they need help. Men should hold other men in their circle accountable for any bad behaviour. Men should be open to show up for eachother in times of crisis, either health, financial or marital. Men should set examples to other men to emulate, such as through mentorship systems.
JOSEPH OKHIKU – Multi-media Professional based in Lagos.

All around the world, men are projected to be Gladiators; Strong, emotionless, dominant, unbreakable, unshakeable and unaffected by adversities. Men are thought to not need emotional support and seen to be able to weather any storm without help. Men love to be appreciated and respected, encouraged and supported, listened to and understood. Care isn’t only about calling each other out when needed but also about being vulnerable with one another, talking about failing relationships and a hug from our bro afterwards. Support one another when we can, offer words of encouragement, advice, motivate and act kindly always. This will build a positive chain capable of making the world see us as emotional beings.
SULTAN KAMAL ABDULAZEEZ – A Civil Servant, Basketballer, and passionate about values and uprightness in society. He writes #minutesbeforemidnight

We can show up for each other by making ‘real friends’ as few as they can be and genuinely helping them grow as they too will help you. See their wins as your win and thus give your quota. This could be something as simple as sharing a link to an online course that you think might be helpful to that friend of yours.
GIDYON LOFTY AMPKITAN – Is a Multi-Media Specialist based in Abuja

We should concentrate on reaching out to each other not only physically but also psychologically because a lot of men are going through things but tend to smile and pretend everything is going cool. The society has created an image of us like that of a super man in the movies that can survive any circumstance, but we are also humans with flesh and blood. So let's talk to each other more to get many of us out of our various holes and troubles.
DANJUMA IDACHABA – A Media and Communications Professional based in Abuja.

Spend quality time with your fellow men, be supportive, guide with investment ideas, Share experiences, encourage living healthy and passionately.
MUSTAPHA DALHATU – A Customer Care Rep. A Husband & a Father.

There are “real friends” and then there are “acquaintances”. I generally tend to spend 35% of my time with the real friends. They are the friends that can improve me physiology-wise, safety-wise, belonging-wise, esteem-wise and self-actualisation-wise (whether directly or indirectly). At the same time, these are friends who I ensure that I can mutually improve their lives physiology-wise, safety-wise, belonging-wise, esteem-wise and self-actualisation-wise. The manner in which the men spend their time certainly varies based on activities or places they find themselves, however every engagement with each other must move them forward in growth & development from where they are to where they want to be. That’s how we ought to show up for each other.
BELLO TONGO – CEO of Tongston Holdings. Passionate about entrepreneurship.

Enjoy other posts The Moral Code shared this week across social media platforms.

Okay now. The gimmicks begin. It's always the little things.

Anyways, enjoy some content from The Moral Code as we continue 30 days of content for Men and seeing the recently marked International Men's Day.

Below is a post on NL here about THE ACTIONS OF THE MAN THAT SHOWS UP FOR HIS FAMILY. Have a good read and enjoy other posts shared during the week from the 30 days of content for Men series

https://www.nairaland.com/6860372/what-actions-man-shows-up

In continuation of the 30 days of content for Men from The Moral Code. Guys share their thoughts on the actions of a man that shows up for his family.

Most men believe that being a good provider means only supporting a family financially.
A man should also contribute to the emotional, spiritual, physical and mental well-being of his family. A man that shows up his family is one who understands his role as a father, lover and friend.
A man that shows up for his family is a protector, this doesn't mean beating up the guy next door if he insults your wife. It means protecting her self-esteem and self-worth as well as your children's. A Leader -Get in the game and create what you want in your family
A teacher - He will lead by example and be a role model to his family
JOSEPH OKHIKU – Multi-media Professional based in Lagos. @joeywizzy

He has to do away with many of the old patriarchal way of life and do everything possible to make sure his home runs smoothly, than leaving so many things to the woman believing he only needs to provide.
A man who does some chores that has been allotted to women since the beginning of time is no stupid man, he knows the benefit of doing those for his home and such a man should be celebrated.
OGAGA AYANWUNMI MICHAEL – A Blogger and IT Professional

Actions that portray that a man owns up to his family are numerous but the most vocal include the following whose inaction can term one as not fully responsible. He should be and act as the head, be a provider within his means, be protective to the safety and being of all. Be a leader and an inspiration to the family. Also be a teacher both in worldly and spiritually matters.
MUSTAPHA DALHATU – A Customer Care Rep. A Husband & a Father.

Responsibility is such an amazing concept. It is broad. Its also specific. It is relative too. But among its variety of expression, I’d like to believe that it is a deliberately learned virtue. It then goes to say that nobody is responsible at conception, rather you BECOME responsible – that’s a process.
Let’s be responsible men. Let’s be men indeed. Men that won’t eschew good counsel; men that won’t let the home front down; men that uphold integrity and honesty; men of virtue and righteousness; men that fear God; men of valour and decent charisma; men that won’t molest women; Paragons of goodness to their children; men who won’t marry a woman and not take care of her. A RESPONSIBLE MAN!
OLISA BASIL NNODIM – IT and Multi-Media Professional.

The man that shows up for his family is seen to be responsible and also hard working, he’s always there trying to meet their daily needs. Looks out for the family's wellbeing and always defends his family against any negative external force.
DANJUMA IDACHABA – A Media and Communications Professional based in Abuja.

35% time spent on the man’s growth & development ought to be shared between himself, his family and his friendships. Certainly, as a man, your immediate family should be your priority while keeping an equal balance with your origin family.
one of the best ways is to look at improving them according to what we all know as the “Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs”. Thus, just like himself, regardless of the person in the family, the question is ‘where are they physiology-wise, safety-wise, belonging-wise, esteem-wise and self-actualisation-wise’ (in that order)? If you really want to show up for them, the resource (money, energy and time) they spend on their family should improve the members in the five realms of the Maslow’s Hierarchy. I urge men to study the various elements within each of the five realms in order to better understand the angle to show up for their family members.
BELLO TONGO – CEO of Tongston Holdings. Passionate about entrepreneurship.

Men can use their skills, knowledge and wisdom to be great brothers, fathers and husbands. To be successful as a man, you have to be a good provider, protector, leader, and teacher. These are all privileges that come along with responsibilities. Being a provider entails supporting your family not just financially but also to be able to contribute to your family’s mental well-being, spirituality and emotional balance.
A PROTECTOR: This means protecting your family’s self-esteem and self-worth. It can also mean protecting your way of life and guarding against any threats
A LEADER: This means taking the lead and initiative to provide solutions and solve problems. This also applies to creating what you want in your family instead of whining about your family situation and blaming it on your wife or family.
A TEACHER: Children look up to both parents as role models and become who they are because of their advice and support. In particular, the father can pass on his knowledge and values to his children, making sure the things he believes are important are carried on to the next generation
SULTAN KAMAL ABDULAZEEZ – A Civil Servant, Basketballer, and passionate about values and uprightness in society. He writes #minutesbeforemidnight

A man that shows up for his family first and foremost has good foresight to envisage a problem even before they happen. Standing up for the family not just the ones they have created, trying to defend their fathers name or image or their mother's name or image or the family. If a child is still under the control of his or her parents, it is not optional for such a man to stand up for the child or not, it is a given, he must, it is a responsibility
GIDYON LOFTY AMPKITAN – Is a Multi-Media Specialist based in Abuja

Find other posts shared this week across The Moral Code social media platforms.

As we continue the 30 days of content for Men. It is day 13. Let us hear from them on this topic. Have a good read and share with your tribe.

Focus is key to success and happiness in life. The most successful people on this planet are highly focused. Highly focused men are simply mindful. Highly focused Men don’t gossip. They have better, more productive things to do with their time. The only people who engage in this petty behaviour are shallow people whose personal lives are not fulfilling enough. Highly focused men don’t multitask. They focus on one thing at a time to boost attentiveness and productivity. Highly focused men don’t procrastinate. highly focused men know the best time to do something is now, and they do it now—not later. They don’t seek validation from others. Highly focused men don’t need your approval because they know their own self-worth.
IDARA EKPO – An Academist and Entrepreneur.

Besides money and energy, the most important limited resource that we have in life is time. If you really want to know what a person cares about the most in terms of interest and passion, you should watch what he spends most of his time on. The focused man spends most of his time on things that add value to his (incl. family and friends) growth & development, his business, and his community’s growth & development. Anything that doesn’t add value to these three components of growth & development doesn’t really deserve any of his time.
BELLO TONGO – CEO of Tongston Holdings. Passionate about entrepreneurship.

I feel what should encompass most of his time should be capacity building, seeing that the world is getting broader, complex and extremely complicated. I feel being focused makes you pick a particular thing and then you get better at it. There’s a saying about the blind man and being focused, as the blind man is not distracted by onlookers or passers-by. If what you want to see tomorrow is a paragon of a gentleman that is distinguished perhaps in his particular area of competency, today should be when he puts in efforts through his time.
OLISA BASIL NNODIM – IT and Multi-Media Professional.

A focused Man is one that will always be organised and plans his day out. Then in his free time should look for ways to improve and add some requisite skills while also not for forgetting to spend some time with family, friends and loved ones. He should strike a balance between his work and his free time.
DANJUMA IDCHABA – A Media and Communications Professional based in Abuja.

You have 24hours a day, how do you utilize this short time to earn a living, look out for yourself while also being there for your loved ones? Create a schedule and balance everything out, this is bliss. Know when and how to get things done.
OGAGA AYANWUNMI MICHAEL – A Blogger and IT Professional

When a man is focused he utilizes his time effectively and efficiently. It starts with writing down and prioritizing your goals. Keep track of your time, Identify and eliminate bad habits. Make out time for family then friends.
MUSTAPHA DALHATU – A Customer Care Rep. A Husband & a Father.

A focused man knows how to maximize his time, to help improve or maintain productivity daily. He does this by having certain routines that helps him manage time appropriately, a focused man ruthlessly eliminate distraction.
A focused man is unstoppable. Especially with all of the distractions that plague men and constantly pull our attention away from our good work. A man without focus is a man who is a slave to the society around him. To become focused as a man, one has to make the decision to first identify who they are. Because your identify will determine what you want to focus on. What you give attention to will become part of your life. By deciding on what to do in life and creating a vision on how to do it, a man becomes more focused.
JOSEPH OHIKU – Multi-media Professional based in Lagos.

A focused man tries to stay committed and away from distractions that my hamper progress; He is goal driven. Men are solution providers and problem solvers. You will have to strike a balance with your time; so much as you are ambitious and look forward to accomplishments, you must also spend adequate time with family.
SULTAN KAMAL ABDULAZEEZ – A Civil Servant. Basketballer, passionate about right values and upright leaving. He writes #atminutesbeforemidnight.

Getting enough sleep, eating well are part of being focused. Living on daily doses or excess doses of motivational speaking without you having your own personal plan is you not being focused enough. The focused man takes care of himself physically, mentally and spiritually.
IDYON LOFTY AMKPITA – Is a Multi-Media Specialist based in Abuja

Other messages for men shared during the week below.
#themoralcode

November 19th is international Men's day.

The Moral Code is sharing a 30 days of content for men. Find this content shared and share your thoughts.

Infertility is not just a woman's business, walk through the journey with your partners. Having infertility issues does not make anyone less of a human.

International Men's day is Marked on 19th November. The Moral Code has dedicated 30days of content for the male folk and this is one of them. We need more topics addressing men's need.
So what does the well-groomed man look like?

A well-groomed Man is the man that carries himself with dignity. He should be able to keep basic hygiene like do his nails, wear ironed clothes, cut his hair, dress sensibly and according to occasion He should be able to at least buy deodorant to smell good.
DANJUMA IDACHABA – A Media and Communications Professional based in Abuja.

I don't necessarily judge people by how they look, I have met awesomely dressed guys with the best of suits and they have got the most terrible attitude. You should have a sense of character; your charisma should speak. But then a well-groomed man should ultimately be neat. Most guys believe they can wear a singlet or undies for fifteen months without changing it and it is terrible. Essentially, look good and don't look like yesterday.
OLISA BASIL NNODIM – IT and Multi-Media Professional.

Looks alone can be a misleading criterion to use in identifying a well-groomed Man. Like they say, looks can be deceiving. A well-groomed Man can be identified by his actions and selfless service to those he loves and cherishes.
Willing to take responsibilities, not full of pride and ready to accept changes in life. Character is part of grooming.
OGAGA AYANWUNMI MICHAEL – A Blogeger and IT Professional

A well-groomed man should be focused, organized, neat, presentable, good mannered and well cultured. Dress well not necessarily expensive (knowing what to wear & when). Clean nails & avoid unnecessary long nails. Take care of your hair. Keep it nice, trimmed and tidy. Smell nice always (Mouth or Body odour is a capital NO). Clean inner wears are a must.
MUSTAPHA DALHATU – A Customer Care Rep. A Husband & a Father.

Grooming is not just about things like keeping a well trimmed facial hair. It’s a part of it, a well-groomed man is someone with neat, tidy and pleasing appearance. A pleasing appearance has a way of boosting confidence. I grew up understanding that your appearance affects your thought process. Being well groomed leads to a bolstered sense of self-esteem which affects how others sees you.
If you feel unkempt, this will impact negatively on how people perceive you. How you carry yourself in the right posture also says a lot.

JOSEPH OHIKU – Multi-media Professional based in Lagos. @joeywizzy

My view in terms of the appearance of a well-groomed man, is that it’s all about three major ingredients: simplicity, comfort and confidence. I tie ‘simplicity’ to the physical aspects of grooming; ‘comfort’ to the clothing aspects of grooming; and ‘confidence’ to the activity aspects of grooming. In terms of clothing-grooming, ‘comfort’ is key. In terms of activity-grooming, ‘confidence’ is key because regardless of how simple and comfortable he looks, it is the manner in which he carries himself when talking or doing something that matters.

BELLO TONGO – CEO of Tongston Holdings. Passionate about entrepreneurship.

Good personal grooming communicates that you care about yourself and you have healthy self-esteem. The well-groomed man should smell good: When you smell good, people notice. It influences how they feel about you. It makes them want to get closer to you. Look after your smile: Keep your teeth neat and your breath fresh. Take care of your facial hair. Have beautiful hands and feet: Clip your nails weekly. Avoid heel cracks. Exercise every day or every other day, it keeps you fit and healthy looking. With these you can get out there looking well-groomed and handsome.
SULTAN KAMAL ABDULAZEEZ – A Civil Servant, Basketballer, and passionate about values and uprightness in society. He writes #minutesbeforemidnight

A well-groomed man, should look appropriately dressed as per occasion demands, knowing when to wear what. Where to where what. He grooms himself by taking care of his physical, mental, and spiritual life.
GIDYON LOFTY AMKPITA – Is a Multi-Media Specialist based in Abuja

Over the years a man’s grooming routine has evolved and it is no longer just a simple shower. There is now beard care, skin care, picking the right deodorant, shaving, manicure and pedicure for men etc. For a typical man, self-grooming is usually the most affected when making a trip. Why? Because it’s a multi-faceted process that involves various actions, tools, and products. That is why it’s very likely that you’ll forget to do or carry something. So, before you leave on that trip, check your grooming essentials. You don’t want to go to foreign lands looking funny.
IDARA EKPO – An Academist and Entrepreneur.

#THEMORALCODE

If you are interested in family values, Morals, Principles, and some Common sense which is increasingly getting scarce. Then we welcome you to enjoy The Moral Code content and follow across social media platforms.

Hoping we can help build a society where the abnormal is stopped from becoming normal.

KEVIND:
Did anyone notice Fulani youths and elites supporting the ban of twitter by the Nigerian feudal state? Did anyone observe that all Fulani politicians both in APC and PDP looked the other way? The only people opposing that satanic policy are Southern youths.

When you people say things like this and make it about tribe, you are part of the problem.

Nothing like ONLY PEOPLE! Those who have a conscience, know right and wrong irrespective of tribe and religion are speaking against this, against it all. So let's stop with all these tribe, region and religion ish

webm:
Which other platforms? Facebook? Because I know many Nigerians that don’t use Facebook. And again, these companies have support staff in both Facebook and Twitter. Now, the support staff wound be in excess and given how Nigeria companies don’t care about overworking their staff, I believe they’d take this opportunity to lay off some of them

Facebook still topping as the biggest used social media. You may know some Nigerians who don't, nor many. I'm less huge on Twitter myself, but still annoyed at this move

My mother is a hustler. She'll find a way to make things happen and she doesn't give up just like that. She's also physically strong and hardly tires out, I no carry that one from her, small sun beat me I go Wan faint. Hehe! But if the task has to do with using brain, sense or creativity, I no dey tire.

Well I digress, here's the real gist. As I said earlier, my mother works hard , she's no lazy woman. She told me this story of how in her younger days, after secondary school, people start searching for work. She went to a part of Town in Jos city that year, searching for work, some company or office that might need new staff. Well on her way back, her transport fare could not take her home, and trekking back was not an option at all.

She stayed a while in the streets wondering what to do, she sighted a Mallam hawking his goods, she can't remember what he was selling anymore, but she stopped him and quickly explained her problem, man didn't ask too much than ask how much she needed, gave her and went his way.

More than 30 years later, I don't know this man, but when I think of him, I pray for him and wish him good. He may be dead or alive. But his kindness that day, still serves as a currency for him.

When we can, let's help people, when we can't help, let's be kind in behavior.
Just remember, a single act of kindness can favor you even before God. Don't be kind for any specific reasons, just be kind for the sake of humanity. Kindness is a language understood by all.

Source - www.themoralcodeng.com

#themoralcode #morals #morality #values #growth #kindness #humanityfirst #musings #naijawriter #naijastories #naijaladies #naijamen #maryamtmc

Do watch this piece, ladies especially will find it useful. By Jola.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whxiwDhD_oQ

Comfort’s Madam watched her as she played with the kids. She thought to herself “what a cheerful young girl.” Her last Maid had suddenly announced her exit at the start of the year, leaving her hanging. She was basically being controlled by her mother who felt she wanted her to go and work elsewhere for more pay.

These girls work in the city, sourced by agents from rural areas or other towns, and most of their pay go to their families, knowing this, Madam D made sure any of them who came to work with her had all their needs provided for, personal needs and health needs, but these girls, their families could get greedy. Which was what happened with her last Maid.

Her last Maid had stayed with her for a year, she knew the routine and was efficient, but suddenly at the start of the year, the girl’s mother became troublesome, demanding for more pay, it wasn’t that Madam D couldn’t afford to pay more, but the subtle threats and attitude from the girl’s mother made her let her go, and seeing that the girl too refused to speak up for herself even while admitting Madam D had always treated her well.

Shortly after the last girl’s exit, Comfort was brought to her. Madam D was sure she could not keep her initially, the girl could barely use basic household equipments, even turning on the gas was a huge challenge, but the attempt to send her back got Comfort crying profusely and pleading with Madam D to let her stay.

Madam D reconsidered because in this girl she saw someone teachable. Her kids and her husband also thought they should give Comfort a chance.

Weeks passed, Comfort had adjusted, Madam D placed her age at around 18 to 20, often times, these girls didn’t know their ages for sure. Comfort was easy going, Madam D had warned her against unnecessary mingling with men and the girl would always hurry back when sent on errands. She never gave attitude when admonished as typical with some young girls.

However, there was one thing Madam D hadn’t done, which she had always done with her maids in the past.

Madam D was at the Salon, when her husband called her, she picked and his words were “come home o, you need to come home now, they called me about her test results, she’s positive”

Madam D became disoriented at the Salon, what she hadn’t done earlier was run major tests on Comfort to confirm her health status and this one had backfired.

Madam D while telling her colleague at work the following week, said “see I just lied to you on phone over the weekend that it’s Hepatitis, she’s HIV positive”.

Even her colleague felt bad about the entire situation, she knew how well Madam D had cone to like Comfort and all the trouble with finding good maids. Madam D believed Comfort’s over agreeable nature, hardly able to say No, always cheerful might have led her to being complacent with boys who took advantage of that very nature of hers, leading her to this sad fate. And without parental guidance too as Comfort’s mother was a local alcoholic drink seller, and her father late, years back. This kind of disaster was bound to happen sooner or later.

As expected Madam D, could not keep Comfort anymore, it was a sad farewell.

This is a true story.
The lessons.

We should place the right steps ahead before we get emotionally entangled in anything. This is to be applied to all other aspects of life, that friendship, that relationship, that job. Have we done the required background checks to avoid heart breaks later?

Some of us may be privileged to have a good life, raised well and have access to the more than basic things for living. But this is not the reality for many, maybe just a single word of advice for young girls and rural women out there can turn their life around and save them from that one misstep that could alter their lives forever, as has happened to Comfort.

Finally, HIV is still very much out there and real. It’s not gone, so for those still living a sexually loose life.

Source - themoralcodeng.com

Mrs. Ola heard her phone ringing. John was the caller, she picked and listened for the next few minutes to his rants, rants which he started by greeting her with "Good day Madam" he went on and on about how her sister, his wife, doesn't take corrections, and is not even efficient with house chores anymore always saying, he should understand it's because she is pregnant.

He ended his rants saying he was tired and he needs a break from this marriage, from Titi. Mrs. Ola asked him "should I send my driver to get her?" There was a pause at the other end of the phone. It wasn't quite the response John was expecting from this woman, he said he'd call her back and hung up.

Mrs Ola immediately called Titi and told her to pack her things the driver would come get her.

She had raised Titi as a second mother after their parents passed. She was more than 15years older than her sister and had fought many battles for them to have a good life. Mrs. Ola currently had only daughters herself.

Months passed, John's ego was already having a melt down, his wife had delivered twins, he was not invited or called for any form of reconciliation. He had not even seen his children. He knew Mrs. Ola was famed as a no nonsense woman, but he too felt he had to teach her a lesson for taking his wife away from him.

His friend and Lawyer after listening to John say he was going to charge Mrs. Ola and her family for abduction told him it looks like he was fighting a lost battle. He allowed her to go and didn't reach out either, he could tell John was suffering inside but ego was his problem. He told John he knows the right thing to do and he should do it.

When John eventually admitted to himself that he missed his wife and longed to see his babies. He found himself face to face with Mrs. Ola at her gate, as she had warned the gate man not to ever allow John into the building.

Continue reading - https://themoralcodeng.com/2021/04/07/leave-my-house-but-who-your-house-epp/

Shey e go against our Morals to shoot shot as woman?

Even if you Wan shoot your shot, which way be the proper way to do am?

When be that time wey you suppose know say shooting your shot, you no need am?


How man supposed respond to woman wey shoot her shot forram?

I don yarn this shooting shot matter before o! If you miss that post Gift Barry say make we join talk this matter again for her podcast GEEROH'S BOX!

Make una use this link listen to the full episode. �

https://anchor.fm/gift-oba/episodes/Shooting-your-shoot-as-a-womansey-e-dey-okay-er5ocb/a-a4p2dln

SMALL GIST

Towards the end of last year I came across a guy I had seen before (few months back) online, had looked through his posts and thought I might want to talk to him. So I decided why not. I sent a message saying, "Hello, my name is... You look like someone from so and so tribes, are you this tribe?" I slept off as it was night and woke up next day to see an answer. He responded nicely and politely and within the next few days I had one of the most amazing conversations with anyone in recent years.

Having that conversation taught me a couple of things, just by virtue of talking to this person I realized subconsciously I was already holding on to some negative thoughts about life, men, relationships and as we asked each other questions, we both learned from each other. We vibed at the same intellectual and maybe emotional frequency. He gave me his attention � percent. Whether we are still talking or not, you gist lovers should come back another day for that part. Haha! �

So now let's get to business.

NOTE OF WARNING PLEASE

�This post is not to encourage young girls, teenage girls to say they are shooting shots.
�This post is not to encourage you to start running after another woman's man in the name of shooting shots.
� And this post is not to encourage you to stay and keep trying to make someone like you or talk to you. You can't force anything.
�It is for assertive, focused ladies who know how to identify what they want but keep conforming to the silent standards that a man must make the first move to learn it does not have to be that way.

So moving on to the point. What ways can you shoot your shot and make the first move?

✔️As in my example, reach out, say hello and add something that will likely lead to a conversation with the person. A question, a compliment... This applies to talking online or physical interaction. All of this requires being bold. How bold are you?

✔️Have a basis or foundation that can lead to a discussion, you see them reading a book you've read, you see them wearing something you know about, comment on it and start your conversation.

The above two examples is with the assumption that you have never spoken to the person and want to break the ice.
So what if you already talk to this person and you know you see potential in them and want more. You either keep dropping hints, like showing concern, being there for them, dropping hints which to me is a time waster and form or self torture, that brings me to the next option which is the one many ladies feel is "God forbid" for them. TELL HIM.

It's tough, but tell him what you see in him and admire, have always admired and why you think you both could be more. You will never know till you ask. If you are feeling bold, ask to meet and spill it. OR write him and spill it, saves you from the anxiety of a face to face interaction.

Everything in life has its plus side and not so great side. Weigh a situation very well before making a move. If you think the friendship you have is better as it is, then that means it holds more weight as a friendship, shooting your shots can lead to loss of friendships, are you willing to take that risk? I'm talking about something like never talking to this person again for the rest of your life. Hehe! But then again, it may also lead to to having the very best kind of relationship you've always wanted, you may also keep the friendship after the awkwardness of the situation has passed and everyone can be themselves again. These are the possibilities.

MORE POINTS TO NOTE

�Shooting your shot does not make you a loose woman, as long as you keep it modest, decent and straight forward. Sending someone nudes is not shooting your shots. That's another thing entirely.
�Shooting your shot does not mean if the man didn't turn out what you thought then you stay and start enduring nonsense. It should be BOY BYE for you.
�Shooting your shot requires you to not be ashamed that you like someone. We live in times where you liking someone is used as a weakness or weapon against you. We like people. We love people. Why should we be ashamed of something that is good?
� You can and will get rejected if shoot your shot, please know your pain and endurance level before you indulge.
�If a man rubs it in your face, it makes you know very fast that this person you thought you like isn't even all that.

The more you can ask for things, the more your skin grows thick to rejection and you move ahead.
Find what works for you. This is just my own angle to the shooting your shot saga as a lady. It gives you a chance at being with someone you really want.

Your thoughts on this in the comment section, I'm sure they'll be very interesting.

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southniyikaye:
You sleep with everyone you meet, to you it’s nothing, it’s part of the Constitution of our generation. When you’re dating someone, it’s a written law that sex must be part of the equation. When you & your friends meet, your rate each other sexual prowess, and body count

Whosoever wrote this trash is Senseless..
If ladies don't give out their bodies for money or material things, no guys will not sleep around..
We are in a generation where being naked to entice followership, monetary gain and money is the order of the day...
On WhatsApp and Facebook status, they use affiliate marketing as cover up for their olosho businesses.. After every advert, they also advertise their unclothedness...
What brought about the issue of paternity today?
Some girls bleeps for fun
Money
Monetary gains..
Everyone of them wants to be like and live like Bobrisky forgetting Bobrisky is a smart businessman..
Bob gave an advice (a useless one at that) some days ago, I was surprised the numbers of braindead endorsing such advice, it shows how very shallow our girls reason

So it's a girl problem and men are faultless in this. It's a pity, et me school you a little. When you see all the pictures of girls flaunting their bodies online, who hails them the most, the men. Those are future fathers, Uncles, brothers etc.

What is the one thing men often think they can offer a woman, Money! Girls think they can offer their bodies, men think money is enough.

If men do not step up to their leadership roles, if they don't raise their standards we will not have better women, it will only get worse, so while you want to throw all the blame on women you also need to read that post again, sexual laxity is now a norm in this generation with both sexes involved. But then again your opinion, a post or angle to anything ca never be every body's cup of tea, and what you decide to comprehend from a post is all on you.

NextD18:
Only an idiiot will try justifying paternity fraud with anything.

Only a bigger idiot does not know how to understand how issues in society connect and have a ripple effect. A worse idiot is the one that does not see that this post is not justifying anything. Take several seats.

Single Ladies! Get in here. This is for you.

Was meant to be a whatsapp session but postponed

This aunty has said what many may still not have the wisdom to understand, they will still ask, what has this got to do with DNA testing? What has it got to do with this and that? We refuse to connect the dots and understand the ripple effects of a society strung up on wanton sex. After you have spent your youth lying with different bodies, even deceiving people to be in bed with them, you now want to settle down to a life of monogamy, karma may be dished to you through the partner you decide to settle with, then you will cry foul play, forgetting the history of your own life.

This is just on an individual level, on a societal level are the individuals we breed who will grow up and have very twisted and confused minds when they find out the scandals their parents were involved in, when they find out they were passed off as one man’s child when they actually belonged to another. Mental health issues afflicts them and the result is an even more sick society.

We are really in trouble, corruption in different forms, in our regular every day lives, we refuse to kick out corruption, yet we say we want the nation to change and we want the leaders to change. Sad.

So below is the excerpt from Your Rich Auntie @adejokewrites as posted on Twitter.

I see a lot of back & forth about DNA test and I just laugh. A generation that has built everything about itself on sex is fighting over DNA. You guys are really funny, you meet someone today & that very night you guys end up in bed.

You sleep with everyone you meet, to you it’s nothing, it’s part of the Constitution of our generation. When you’re dating someone, it’s a written law that sex must be part of the equation. When you & your friends meet, your rate each other sexual prowess, and body count.

All the songs we listen to are sexual in nature, music videos nko, sexually explicit, the most read articles are all on sex. And if one has a contrary opinion, you dare not say it. No one wants to hear no premarital sex or waiting for marriage You’ll be dragged, insulted & questioned if you dare say, you’re waiting till marriage.

Now the consequences of your actions are coming out, you’re crying. What did you expect when you used all your single years to sleep around? You think it’ll just stop? Because you’re now married? Kolewerk. If you planted fornication, you’ll reap adultery in full. Many of you are caring for kids, not yours, but you don’t know. This is just the beginning. What we’re seeing now is small, konitu sleeping around.

Vistit themoralcodeng.com to see more posts around Morals, Morality, Values, and more.

sissoko22:
His choice.
Please give up already.

Whatever is in public view will be talked about. His choice of course. Which we all make and we deal with the consequences of our choices

A very convenient time to be quoting sunnah! Failed to mention other sunnahs that calls for similarity and compatibility between partners.

Smells of hypocrisy and double standards. 46 and 26. Kid yourself very much boy! Time will tell you how far. You are still growing up.

MORAL AND ETHICAL LESSONS FROM THE MOVIE CITATION

I'm not always quick to watch new movies whilst the rave and rant about them is ongoing, but I guess I made an exception of Kunle Afolayan's latest titled CITATION. So straight to the point, these are what I believe are some of the Moral and Ethical lessons from the movie and how the boundaries you don't set can destroy your life.

That it remains true we must be ethical in our relationships, draw lines set boundaries. There are places unnecessary familiarities are not needed. The lecturer and the student, the religious leaders and their followers, the boss and the staff. Move away from anything that tempts you into wrong doing, move away physically and mentally.

The main character proves that in truth being very young can make you very naïve. There are some things that only experiences and the passing of years can help you gain wisdom on. You could be young and intelligent not necessarily very wise and experienced to win with a sly person or to handle the complications of life.

Sometimes we tolerate the evil we see in people, maybe because we continue to see the good in them which isn't there or we pretend to be there, or because we just want them around. As with the main characters friendship relationship with Ini Edo who proved to truly not be a good friend.

That even the the devil can look like an angel and people only show different parts of themselves to different people.
Manipulators and abusers have a set pattern of behavior. It's important not to ignore patterns, or what they say and the behaviors they exhibit.

All your degrees and so called educational qualifications do not define your moral uprightness. A poor man in his small village can have a better moral compass, principles and values than someone who is well educated and widely traveled.

Source - themoralcodeng.com

JONSYN7154:
The truth is that if you can endure women's repugnant character you won't regret your marriage.

Marriage is all about enduring each other's character.

if you have tough enduring skin you'll have a PERFECT marriage.

Why should you have to endure repugnant character, like why? Whether it's coming from the man or woman. Does repugnant feel like anything anyone would want to return home to every evening? There are some things not to be endured but corrected

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9dmvXZi9yk

Are you constantly lying about who you are to fit in? Are you constantly doing things you don't actually feel like doing? Do you only respect people of status and high standing and look down on some other kinds of persons? Do you behave a certain way to constantly get something from people? Is this you or someone you know? Let's talk about being fake and how to get real. Real and honest is the new beautiful.

Another episode of The Moral Code