₦airaland Forum

ecolime:
Anyway, she didn't indicate the man's age. So there should be old Bachelors (40 to 50) ready to wife her. Goodluck in her search.

Same way there are men in their 20s and 30s who will propose if they like her.

ecolime:
You have millions of them around, but how many would be interested in a 35year old woman?

A good number of the women you see get married each weekend are in their 30s. If I personally know more than 5 Nigerian women in their 30 get married this past couple of months, what does that tell you? People I went to school with. Late 20s to mid 30s all getting married like clockwork.

I don’t know why NL is a den of perpetuating false and unrealistic narratives. 30+ is increasingly the marriage age I’ve been noticing recently.

Abiflexy01:
This is totally different from the main question, sensible husbands should always support their wives dreams, most men will gladly support their wives if she is building her own house and if you notice most men always include their wife's name in their properties. The question here is why house if he had many already, will they now relocate to the new one or what? and secondly is it okay for such a huge project to be done secretly.

He’s in a better position to answer. Why doesn’t his wife feel safe enough to share such information with him?

ecolime:
Please educate her because you are truly not far from the truth.

Nothing is impossible, so all I can wish her is Goodluck.

Takes a miracle to find a single childless man who’s not a criminal?

ednut1:
a single man with those specs abroad and above 35 is not going to marry a 35 year old woman . Even older celebs like rita and funke akindele had to marry divorced men. Make una dey tell these babes reality

Is the not-divorced part the unrealistic expectation here? First let me say that I personally don’t see any issues with being divorced. I’m an advocate for quitting a non-viable marriage and I believe divorced people can find love again. But what’s unrealistic about a non divorced man in his 30s?

1) why would someone look for a relationship if they aren’t already single. That makes the single part of her requirement a common sense requirement.

2)And what’s difficult about not being a criminal? I want to believe the greater percentage of the population aren’t criminals.

So again, the too much she’s asking for here is that he not be divorced?

Most people always say choose better men but when women try to, you guys say they are asking for too much.

She’s in her 30s, she’s young!!! And she can definitely find someone her age or slightly older who fits her requirements. It happens all the time.

Y’all quit this nonsense rhetoric that tries to tell women that once they are no longer 20+ then they are worth nothing. It’s insanely mind-blowing misogynistic.

Men and women in their 30s get hooked to each other every Saturday and we all go dance and make merry but come online to tell women that if they over 30 they can’t expect to marry a single non-criminal oriented man.

She didn’t even ask him to be tall, rich and handsome. Lmao. And she didn’t have an age requirement either. I’ve seen men in their early 40s who have never been married. Those men are passing their prime and can’t be that choosy either. So if a woman in her 30s says yes, they are to be thankful

ednut1:
Making unrealistic demands at 35 You aint ready

What’s unrealistic about a single, childless, non-criminal oriented man? That’s like below the bar bare minimum.

Better question is why do Nigerian men (as shown on NL) hate the idea of women owning property? Is it because property can help build wealth and we hate the idea of wealthy women? What’s the actual problem?

And since it’s undesirable for women to own property without the permission of their husbands, does this mean we are encouraging joint ownership of property where men build houses and include the women as co-owners? I haven’t seen that as the norm (again on NL). So again what’s y’all’s problem? Why the enemy of progress vibes?

amorprincesa:
I love spice...

Same. can’t stand bland food

Hed0nist:
Yeah sure. Men have every right to ask. Women have every right to say no.

Meaning that it takes two to tango. Great!
We have reached an understanding

No woman demands you to be a bad boy. Some of you just tell yourselves lies to justify your weird beliefs


Yes women can decide to stay pregnant or not.
Yet one man can impregnate a different woman everyday for 365 days. It seems as if unbridled male sexual exuberance is a better indicator of population explosion than that of women.

Supersymetry:
Example, to double a population in few years you need few men and Many women, but can't be achieved with many men and few women. Not to mention that they own natural incubator.
Women hold the key to the rate of population growth, one of the reason Muslims hardly give out women.
It might look like 50/50 but it's not, majority of the power belongs to women, especially the decision to be pregnant, because female fertility has window, but men don't. Possession of womb.
The fact that there are three arms of government don't mean that the power between them are shared equally.

The society/nobody is expecting men to be sexually experienced but women, same women want, all men turn bad boy. The list goes on and on. Then turn to complain about it. So help me ask women that demand sexually experienced men how they are going to get the experience.
The problem with women is insincerity, and greed,they should openly advocate what they want and be truthful about it.

Their demands are alway irrational and delusional. Since women demand irrational things, they should also provide a solution to it.

Supersymetry:
Women control the gateway to procreation and most of sexual pleasure, that's an absolute power they have , but power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.

If men keep their sperm cells in their testicular regions, no eggs are getting fertilized and no procreation is happening. So this here is a convenient cop out use to abdicate responsibility to the other party. Another regurgitated talking point from the podcast bros that falls apart when you shine a small light of logic on it. Remember logic? The one you were just advocating for.

To add; only an inexperienced or naive person/man believes women want a male virgin or chastity in men, all they do is reverse psychology to blackmail men into accepting high body count. Women willing give it out to the highest bidder, and claim victim.
To women the greater the body count the greater the appeal, often times irrelevant. So let no one ask me illogical question of male virgin, something they/ females don't value, dislike, as a good man am here to help some men understand reality not for illogical suggestions.
The question should be how do we create a society where women value chastity in men, off course by editing the Gene or DNA of human females.

I see.

Women don’t want virgins or low body count men therefore men have to somehow get a bunch of sexual experience under their belt before settling down. But at the same time, the women within their community are somehow expected to be virginal and celibate.

Oh What a conundrum!

So it’s safe to say the lamentations are only beginning?

Hed0nist:
Na for those romance novels them mills & boons, harlequin and silhouette dem de find this kind babe.

You must be trolling walahi. The man sef no go fear?

This has to be a joke

Glad you can see how ridiculous it sounds.

Hed0nist:
It’s simple. The women should just say no.

Right. So less sex for men then? We are on the same page with the less-sex-for-men idea

revived2:
You have a YouTube food vlog?

no. I wish

Wifeneeded:
Might look funny, but it is not. My marriage was indeed a serious one, but what will be, will be. I However owe the lady to be my wife some explanation though

I’m sure it must have been serious if you guys ended up married. I was just amused by the way you said you’re now ready for something serious. It kinda gave the impression that the previous one wasn’t serious.
But I understand what you meant after all

1) fried rice and honey walnut shrimp

2) ham scramble and roasted vegetables

Easy to say

Winters23:
The man is a coward


No real man should beg for his life this way.

When a man come face to face with death look it in the face and tell to go fvck itself.


Take the bullet and die with dignity

Divorced and and NOW ready for a serious relationship

I don’t know why I found this funny. was the marriage not serious?

Nothing to add

Gerrard59:
Never going to happen unless you want to usurp the tradition of bride-price and dowry across many cultures.

On the other hand, what Cococand.y meant is: you cannot expect women to be chaste while the men are doing brostitution upandown. While I understand that men pay the piper, hence, dictate the tune, it smacks of hypocrisy for the same men to harp on the need for virgins. Look at the Baze University's example, older men are literally spoiling and debasing these women with so much money for pleasure of 30 mintues. Tomorrow, the younger ones (who plan to do the same when they age) will chant "wE wAnT vIrGiNs". Like I argued here: https://www.nairaland.com/6643241/nigerian-men-failed-women If Nigerian men esp the young ones want their women to be virgins, they have to create an environment for that to thrive. These women no dey fvck themselves.

Virginity is prized in the Arab world largely because the men created that environment and the consequence are severe that even young Arab women who studied in western countries have to undergo hymenoplasty to re-fix the hymen so they get married. Meanwhile, in countries such as South Korea, Japan, Singapore, Taiwan etc., pre-marital sex is rampant but wedlock is rare because the men tolerate the former but not the latter. So, those East Asian women don't undergo hymenoplasty in a bid to get married. How many women have you heard/seen/read undergone hymenoplasty in Nigeria? But there has been a rise in plastic surgeons to add more flesh to the yansh and breasts because the men reward such behaviour.

In summary, "men create the system, women integrate into it." - Pansophis.t

GloriousGbola:
Team just the tip at it again

Ah don’t kill us with laughter

begoniaa:
You did not answer that question satisfactorily and direct!

How do we create a society in which women aren't overused? How do we ensure women stay virgins or have low body counts?



So, if I get you right, in a nutshell, you are saying women should completely stop having sex with men to retain their values?

You post is hella confusing.

They are dancing around a completely simple and clear question just to avoid saying what they might have deduced the question was leading them to say.

pocohantas:
By women closing their legs and men forcing it open. Abi you want them to die ??

they are dancing around the question like it isn’t clear

JBriel:
When humans depend on laws to act, humanity has been reduced and bastardized.

Okay.

yes speaking in general terms anyone who needs rules/laws to tell them how to be good, aren’t intrinsically good. They may just be conforming in order to avoid punishment. Whole heartedly agree. And of course that implicates almost everyone.

Simply put, ladies should be more humane and moral. Embrace satiety, patience, long suffering, tender without loosing the soft feminine mystique. View tomorrow through the lens of hope. Not seeking the next exit out of complex situations

But my question is referring to the topic of women being “overused” aka not being virgins. We are prescribing less sex for women without addressing the issue of more sex that we promote and encourage for men.
Is there anyway that makes sense unless we somehow think men can magically have more sex while women have less of it. In the same society. How?

#nosarcasm

I’m sincerely happy for you that you have contemplated and settled on a decision that is best for you and at the same time is saving another person some trouble as well.

I’m saying that because some guys might feel like this and still end up getting married. Imagine how miserable they’ll both be? Of course I’m more concerned about the lady being miserable but yes they’d both be feeling the same frustration.

At least you have decided what you don’t want from the beginning.

Raalsalghul:
Marriage comes with sooo much responsibility which I don't want. I can't be responsible for another adult who most probably will not add any value to me.

Yes, call me irresponsible. I accept it with my full chest.

Also, mind you, Redpill doesn't translate into hatred for women. Or have you seen me shaming women on this forum at anytime?

Though, I agree with you Baby mamarism comes with its own challenges so maybe I'll look towards Surrogacy or adoption.

Thank you.

Hi.

So, What do you think would need to happen amongst the general population in order for women to stop being “overused”. How do you think we as a society can go about creating a dynamic where women are virgins and/or have low body counts?

Supersymetry:
A sure reality,
At the end most woman will still get a financial stable man, because men don't want to die poor.
But most men will definitely get, overused woman, ie not the kind their inner mind desire.
men can only change it temporary by raising their standard as it has been before, but that's equal to fighting nature and denying reality, like raising a particle into a higher energy level of unstable equilibrium, it will surely fall back to ground state giving enough time and circumstance.
Serious men are looking for alternative to women; Monopoly of any kind is dangerous.
Artificial uterus, AI android ,
Or the nuclear option, transcending and digital immortality, eg mind upload and cloning.

Mindlog:
When Reno was mentioning Tonto and Nkechi Blessing, didn't he remember it was their private lives or his jabs at single mothers.

He prides himself to be a table shaker, well other table shakers have come out to play. No one has the monopoly of being insensitive.

Only insensitive self righteous jerks like Reno will not see a problem with him. He’s always been loud and wrong.

Acidosis:
What's this coco?


22 and financially well to do ke?

Yes na. They want young girls who have their own money hence won’t depend on them and will contribute to the family wealth building. Over 25 is getting to evening newspaper and over 30 should frankly stop existing as far the standards go these days.

So I think my understanding of the requirement is on point. Don’t you think so?

Moreover, see the amount of likes that post is getting. I don’t know if the sarcasm isn’t apparent or these folks really read that post and said “yes, those are reasonable expectations”.

Marvyx:
A legit way to dump her then. If not, why would a man back out from a legit marriage proof to someone he loves?

na who I go ask? Lol

They are helping each other out

IvarTheBoneless:


Northerners divorce at the drop of a hat. Seen people divorce because coffee for breakfast was too cold.

Nothing like old cargo or used goods. Women can marry up to 4 - 5 husbands in their lifetime.

Threaten a woman with divorce , she might just accept and marry a friend of yours.

Seen a woman marry 3 different guys on same street. Currently on her 7th husband.

Guys in their 40s married 16 times ! A very rich man in Kano married 33 times

Yes I meant THIRTY-THREE. Tati tiri for Godsakes!



Babangida's daughter married as 3rd wife.... Abacha's daughter recently remarried as 4th I think.

tensazangetsu20:
Nothing. You got everything right. This kind of women exist in Nigeria but they wont want the op's kind. People dont know that with regards to hypergamy women look at more than money. They also want to be able to look up to you intellectually too. Its why intelligent women mostly marry intelligent men.

You mean mumu women exist in Nigeria? Because a mugu is what I just described

What do you think will happen if they try to travel abroad as husband and wife without a wedding certificate?

First of all do you think they can travel without that?
They have to travel with some proof of marriage even if it wasn’t issued by a court (but I’ll let y’all know now that depending on where they are going. Only a govt issued certificate is acceptable). Let say they do manage to go without a court cert but they offered some form of proof marriage, do you think she can’t use that same proof for whatever evil y’all think she’s planning to commit?

Just think about it.

emmanuelbrown26:
THAT LADY IS A MARRIAGE SCAMMER, ALL HER MIND NA COURT WEDDING SO THAT SHE FIT USE AM AGAINST BABA FOR OBODO OYIBO

Marvyx:
If you guys want to travel out, chances are that he's aware of family laws over there that favours women and not men. But that's not the main issue because many Nigerian couples are still getting marriage documented before travelling out.

I think you or someone else may have subtly given him the idea of uncertainty of what will happen when he marries you and travels out with you. We've read stories about how Nigeria ladies go abroad and turn to lions in the household because of their family laws. Guy man wants to protect himself. Forget 6 years, women will still be women. I can't think of anything else than that. The solution is to give him an assurance of loyalty.

satandeterrible:
Only a very foolish man will opt for court wedding when he intends to travel out with his spouse.

How many stores do we read here day on day out about men that have been rendered homeless and penniless by their Nigerian wives abroad.

When in Nigeria, the act like innocent, little princesses. Once you marry her in the court's and travel out, she transforms into a devilish tigress.

Your man is an indeed very wise man.
From the look of things, your plan is to ride on his finances to travel out of the country, then after some time, rape him in the divorce courts.

You are very wicked and demonic.
Tell me, why are you insisting on court wedding if not for your devilish and evil intents.

God will punish you pig.
May God help that man not to marry a wicked and scheming devil like yourself.

Acidosis:
I'm lost. Define "quality woman".

Young below 25. Preferably 22. Must be financially well to do.

Oh and no sex. Prior sexual activity disqualifies her.
Must be exclusively his but also be willing to be subject to his whims. Be tolerant and obedient when he’s exercising his polygamous rights. No questions.

When he’s done with other women, she’ll use her money to buy laundry detergent and wash their scent off him.

What did I miss?