₦airaland Forum

@ reddish

you again lol
I can see you have a serious crush on Omotala, she's real lucky to have you in her bag. To what extent won't you go to defend her name?, even when its obvious the poster didn't mean anything out of the blue with the comment.

Please dearie, take it easy. Its just a "celebrities'" world, but not to worry though, if i ever get to meet OMOSEXY, i'll never forget to mention you to her, aight darl??

HAPPY NOW?

Well dear, its a good thing you realised your mistakes. Lying is not a good foundation for any relationship, i'm happy you know that now, should a "next time" arise

Now there's only one way out, tell the truth. The longer you keep it a secret, the bigger chances of it ruining what you have, and how worse if it should drop out by mistake from you or someone that knows you. It'll make it more purnishable, and you wouldn't want that?

Take her to somewhere quiet, sit her down and tell her the simple truth. Tell her why you had to lie, that you were afraid of her turning you down, and that you didn't know you'll grow to love her this much (even though there shouldn't be an excuse for lying, be as honest as possible, let her be able to read the honesty in your eyes and the fact that you never want to hurt her.

Of course, she'll be hurt (we girls are always sensistive you know ), might even feel betrayed but she'll get over it. I believe she loves you enough to give you a second chance(i hope you don't have more skeletons in your cupboard ooh )

Like someone mentioned you guys are still to young to be thinking marriage, but should it come to it, know that there's nothing wrong or unheard of in marrying someone your age. As long as both of you gat what it takkes to make it a good one and make it work, the sky is your limit!!!

My dear, the english man will call it "a list of priority"

Make one,

Who do you really love most out of the three, you cannot love two people the same you know?
what is it you need/want most in a girl, which of them bears those quality(ies)
which of the girl do you see standing out the length of time?
Which of them do you see making a better wife?

Dearie, take your time and think things through. Maybe take some space from them so your judgement don't get clouded, then spend some time with all three equally to see who has that "little extra" you want in a woman Cos they all sound like three different people.

Do not let someone else make the decision for you Cos your priority and likes might not be somone else's and you'll rather live regretting and building up your own mistakes and choices than someone else's.

You should take your decision in good time, and gently let the rest two go so they don't get their hopes high and be rejected in a bad time , When you've taken your decisions, live and stand by it. Nothing and nobody is perfect, and you couldn't have married all three or . . ?

And maybe, just maybe you're yet to come across your soulmate , one step at a time hun!!

@ Ballash,

I get your point of view, really i do Yes they shouldn't promise things Cos its our money. Its not his money and in your words, "he's our servant"

Now view with me:

I believe in the saying, first things first

First of all, they're there to serve our country, but calling them servants to me would be the right choice of word
Thousand of them have been there, promised us and yet didn't do a sh^t out of all they promised . . what have we done to those people?? Nothing, they're all walkiing about, squandering our money, doing none of the listed-promises but what have we done about it?? That's why when someone else comes along and promises, we get excited with a hidden hope that he does as promised

Now, why do we get happy when a handful of them actually carry out their promises?? well dear that's because the ones that do as they said, are much much lesser in number than the ones that don't. We say thankyou, Cos even though its all "our money", if they didn't do the things they promised, we would still not have done a thing about it!! So the thanks is to tell him that's he's appreciated amongst others and hopefully he'll do more

Anambra state, had this governor once that was sent from heaven, Anambra was really becoming a better place. But before we knew it, Obasanjo had already demolised him as a governor, why?? . I've come to believe that the leaders at large do not like the ones that actually do something worth-while with our money!!

TruBrotha:
lol @ wowo + wowo = chei lol lol i bet sai u be chei nah hi make u fit even come up with the fomula lol.

I'm coming back at ya and hey i am very sorry that the offer is not open to u because i am not gay lol hahahaha.

LOLOLOL . . but one advice though, beggers they say cannot be choosers don't jump into saying you're not gay until you're sure what the outcome of the sale will be. At the end of the day, if no female is ready to prize you, i'm sorry honey but you might want to settle for a guy. That's if there's one that wants you

But honestly i bear you no hard feelings, because ok, i can't say i know how you feel, Cos i've never been in the situation of needing to sell myself, but i can imagine though what you're going through. You've even become so frustrated to the point of seeing double. Only a blind man would mistake the "f" and "m" gender, sicne you obviously mistook me to be male LMAO But like i said, we're cool

BTW, if nairaland doesn't work out, you can try a church "harvest and bazar", i'm sure someone would like to buy you there, at least for 50kobo or 1naira. Good luck with the business sha!!!!!!

[quote author=blue-sky link=topic=51114.msg1079282#msg1079282 date=1177868059]@Cute-ass
i agree with everything your saying, why can't most people be like u [/quote]Be like me?? I don't know about that ooh . . then i won't have someone to argue with . . naah

But seriously, thanks for the compliment, i'm flattered

I guess there are some certain situations you need to have witnessed yourself, to see the author's point of view. I'll be nutts to point an accusing finger on her when i know i've been in her shoes and can confess life wasn't anything to write home about at the beginning . . but its all good sha!!
Its always an adventure to be told, mine eneded well. I hope her do too!

davidylan:
Because if we all wrote long emotional epistles like dear old mummy, nairaland would be the most boring place on earth.

I agree with you, but why epistles?? what about acts of the apostles or you forgot sermon on the mount

Don't worry i'll be releasing psalms soon

jaybaby:
Wow--Cut-Ass, your Replies r alwayz Long Abeg WHY?

Because i like stating everything i think, not half of it, is that ok with you??

Its just for the benefit of the beneficiary, noone else. Anybody that thinks its too long for their reading, can jump over. Believe me i won't draw you back

2muchmoney:
miss cute ass,
so would u , as a person,
remain in a relationship, marriage involved, !!!
if domestic violence kicks in, ?

or he tells u, he is fed up, and wants to seperate, ?

don't lie,

LOL . . well i'd rather not go there, every circumstance deserves a different out-look, so until i'm there i'd be lying to say i know exacty what i'm going to do So since you specifically warned me not to lie, i won't!!

I pray dearly to God that i don't have to be there, but like i love to say, i'll cross the bridge when i get there.

One thing i'm sure though is that the day my boyfriend totally looses his love for me, i'd leave and not turn back, Cos it takes two to do the dance

dodowaski:
Its not true at all. On the contrary women are more mature than men when it comes to relationship. Don't be deceived these girls have seen things so they know more than we do.

I agree with you that women are more matured than men (not all women though) when it comes to relationships, yes ooh, its a sealed signed fact.

They give it all to make it work, and sometimes their efforts are misjudged and mistaken for stupidity

Yes someone's hereeeeeeeeeeeee!!

Seriously you're highly welcome to nairaland with lots of love, you sound really fun and jovial, that's good

BTW if i may ask, what's your nationality, from your post i could gather you aint nigerian, am i right??

Well this is were its happeneing, so its a good thing you're social Cos we've got all categories of them people

While you're at it, just stay out of trouble, aight??

eeeeeennnnnnnnnjjjjjjjjjjjoooooooooooyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!

2muchmoney:
cute ass,
All you the examples you gave actually does relate to what am trying to get at,
but 1 major one is that fact that most women will still remain in a relationship even tho there is domestic violence INVOLVED
is that love or dumbness

Blunt and absolute dumbness

I pity people like that, but then its not their faults all the way, we should blame love some

I understand that you should fight for what is yours, determine on your stand to gain success and you shouldn't give up at any cost[b] but[/b] what i find irritating is when you're fighting for something that is not worth it, or something that doesn't want to be fought for. I think that is sad

If you're in a marrieage. its totally different, some vows and promises have been made, but when your boyfriend walks up, tells you he doesn't love you ever or anymore, that he's been trying to, all to no avail,

You guys decide to give it a second shot, at the end of the day, he still isn't feeling you, now you'll be damned not to hit the road.

I know, yes i know its painful, its so undescribeably painful, please cry, kick the wall, do everything to get out the anger dissappointment, sadness, heartbreak and all it comes with, but i'll not advice you to remain there or start lashing out threats to the guy.

Love cannot be forced, its something else when something or someone is the cause, but apart from that, walk.
What gain is it to you to be with someone that neither wants you nor loves you , Or is it that they don't think they deserve better?? I call it DESPERATION!!!

finemocha:
choogntin  when  u go home just have fun ok.  and no offense but going to nigeria at this age is not giong to change your attitude.  your rudeness.  u have passed the impressionable age. and once u go back to america u will be surrounded with the same old rude freinds anyway.  To be polite has to be taught at home, not when the child is a teenageer u send them to boarding school so that it can be some other person's problem.  I have a lot of friends who went ot nigeria for boarding school.  heck they are still freaking rude, only now they know how to smoke garri.

That was funny (now i understand why my parents dragged me there at the age of 5 ) I do get you though but everybody might adapt differently

In as much as i believe in the saying "train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he'll not depart from it" and i have some friends too that have gone and come back the same

lets not forget the few that have changed some deal, even though i'm disciplined, respectful and all that (things i apparently learnt in naija) I came back to Norway at the age of 15+ but there are still some attitudes from naija that i've switched with some here

What i'm trying to say is that it might not be too late, atimes its all about choices, we can chosse to drop the bad attitudes and go for the better ones though we aren't used to them.

Her parents might have been a bit late, but better late than never, right??

You cannot afford to loose this opportunity?? well it seems you want to loose it by still sitting there "thinking", when the clock is ticking

You're in love with this girl, she's shown you some sweet side of her, which might mean she's interested and you're here asking nairaland what to do . . lol, thanks for making me laugh, its been a moody day

You got to take your chances, ask her out There are two possible answers to the question:


YES?: and you're a lucky man, take her out, treat her nice, get to know her, and if she's what you want in a girl and the spark is there, then who knows what it might lead to?? Wedding bells?? No one knows, you just take a step at a time. The sky is your limit!!!

NO?: Its painful, i know that alright. But life goes on sooner or later, knowing you tried but unfortunately it didn't work out. That would give you the closure you need to live on to the next phase of life, than going about speculating everyday, wasting your time and hers till someone comes along from no where, and you live the rest of your life in "WHAT IF". Its not a recommendable situation ooh, beileive me

Darl. you got to get your feet moving, remember to make hay while the sun shines Cos time waits for noone, and the next minut might be too late Wish you luck though!!!!!!!

2muchmoney:
is true that women are so dumb when it comes to relationships, !

Dumb? as in we love with all our heart, give everthing to make it work, exercise patience with our guy, try to create hapiness even when it seems impossible, try to be there for our guy even when he's proven he doesn't deserve it, forgiving him his numerous atrocities, compromising to the least to make him happy, at the end of the day getting all your work smashed in your face for some other girl that doesn't give a hoot about what a relationship shpuld be like, a girl you know doesn't stand up to your slip-ons

Yes some girls have been that dumb

Elaborate your point of view, then we can talk? Can't read your mind

khalifonia:
hey cute-ass, i aint no girl, am a guy, as on profile. and thanks for the welcoming

Sorry dear, i've modified it already

There've been so many new girls in the forum lately, that i just went with the flow. Didn't mean to insult your gender nor mooden your day. Please accept my apologies

chiegemba:
Wow! u guys r 2 harsh "abeg take am easy oooo" D girl didnt mean 2 offend anybody through her written. She just thought she might get a better view through d help of Nairaland users not crucifixtion of her statment.
Very true she might not have used d greatest choice of words, but pardon her. As per it was just a cry 4 help!

Still reading my mind

If i can remember the girl's post correctly, she wrote down her fears, asked for help, advice and guidance and then asked if someone else have been in her shoes.

What does she get?? Mouth-slaughter

What's wrong in saying, what you heard about your country and mine isn't all true, give her a reason to look forward to her experience there. No matter how lovely weknow it is, she hasn't been there.

If living abroad has made her rude and non-challant, then so be it. Isn't that why she's being taken doen to Nigeria to learn some?? Her parents already told her that, so why can't we tell her something she doesn't know already??

I have been in her shoes, i was dragged down to naija at the age of 5, and even so young as i was it wasn't easy at all Being in the midst of a whole new world, you know nothing about their language, i couln't even speak English at the time, just Norwegian. I cried and cried and cried. I just my parents were just being wicked but today i couldn't thank them enough

But then i had to go, see and conquer to find that out. Lets give her a chance to do the same.
It's never been a crime to be scared or is it??

The newest of the new . . hun i love the sound of it!

Well dearie welcome to the land of friendship and enemity, discussions and arguements, live long or get banned, troube-makers and peace-loves- - - - - i'm talking about NAIRALAND!!!!

The list not withstanding, its going to be a ride you won't forget in a long long while, yes ooh, a memorable one


eeeeeennnnnnnnjjjjjjjjjjjjooooooooyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!

busygirl:
Hi choongtin darling, First of all, Is that you on your profile? _{just curious} If yes you're pretty and look like a white girl. Nigeria is not as horrible as you think it is. . . .There are lovely places in nigeria, lots of them. When you get to naija I'll advice you to visit abuja. . .And you'll forget you're even in nigeria. Idon't blame you. . . I think if your parents have been allowing you to visit nigeria during the holls. . .You won't be Scared! About mosquitoes, insects and stuff, it's inevitable. . .start getting used to it! I have cousins like you, at the mention of bees, mosquitoes,or cockroach, They start crying. . And they told me that they will never go to Africa because they hate insects. Although they are still young. . .but I feel sorry for them. Believe me, there's no place like home. ^{ALWAYS REPRESENTING!} Green is ma home.

THANK YOU JOOOOOOOOOO!!

spoilt:
nigeria is not perfect. we never said it was. but it beats me hollow when people front like they are petrified of kidnappings and blah blah. who would want to kidnap your sour ass?

So tell me dear, the ones that have been kidnapped and killed in the past, were their asses smooth??
Its just being at the wrong place at the wrong time
It doesn't happen in Nigeria alone, but when you're moving to somewhere unfamiliar, life has a way of making it seem to you as if "that place" is the end of the world.
Tell me something if it wasn't Nigeria she was talking about, would we have been here making all these arguements??

spoilt:
don't they see all the muggings, rapes, killings, suicides, pervs, pedophiles, necrophiliacs, armed gun men, drive bys that take place here? don't those worry them? they live here up to their eyelids in debt to finance school and just to survive and they have the guts to talk smack about the motherlan'? please!

Well thats just it, our fears sometimes blinds us to the realities of life, we tend to see things for what they're not.

I remember talking to my cousin last year, and i was like i prefer living in England to living in the Us, because ever since the tower incident i've been scared to death about the place. And he was like, well what about the train incident that happened in London. I now said, well i'll stay put in Norway, and then he finally said, "what makes you think Norway is anything more secured".

That was when i started thinking straight again!! FEARS OF LIFE!!

D Truth:
@cute ass
i don't agree with u on that ooooo.
Hav u asked why the blacks are leaving and the whites are entering Nigeria

Just to prove that it goes both ways, what you're condemning someone else loves, and what you love, someone else doesn't necessarily have to love Its not a defensive attack of "my country, my country", everybody has their preferences!!

I love Nigeria with all my heart,its the best place you can have fun and feel alive, i don't support her way of composing the post but her aim of it was being scared, and insecure. What is wrong with that?? what is wrong with giving her some sisterly and brotherly advice?

In summer i'll be moving to another town in Norway, for my university right?? I'M bleeping SCARED!! That's just a human feeling. I'm a whole lot excited, but i'm still nervous to the change of enviroment, you can't help wondering what its going to look like. On more than a 1001 occassions, i've asked friends who live there, what is it like?? how is this, how is that?? thats just life!! This is in the same country just another town not to talk of a whole different country.

Yes we know that Naija is the best, lovely and all that, but she doesn't, she had to build up thoughts on what people said

There was this thread on why our youths all want to travel out of the country(Nigeria) some will do anything humanly possible to achieve that, so tell me why?? Lets not all hide behind i love my country story!

Most of us are in europe, why the hell aren't we in Nigeria?? our dearly beloved country! Afterall there are schools in Nigeria, you can do business in Nigeria, so why aren't we?? Have we ever tried to fly bac to Nigeria and meet some air-port workers who said "no you can't travel back??

I hear some adults saying when i've made it money-wise i'll leave, some will say if not for the money, why will someone leave africa to come here and suffer?? well my dears if money wasn't all that important, why can't they just go back and live with whatever they see??

Please lets face facts here, we love our country so much, but there is still something however little it might be that we love to have been here

Well i think by now she's gotten the message, we've all asked of some unfamiliar countries one time in our lives, though not rudely

She said she "heard" '(it might be true, Cos the whites truly are good at making us look bad), we all hear things. Some have asked me untrue things about Norway which i've simply said "no, its not true" to.

Some of us are scared of adjusting to new things, even if she doesn't live good here, its what she's used to, some Nigerians when they get to europe also complain of it not being "all that". Actually it goes both ways!!

Please ma people, take it easy on her. The first thing i thought to myself too was '"gosh, this girl's got some nerves", but on second thoughts She might have sounded rude, but isn't that why her parents want to send her to naija to learn some discipline?? I'm sure she already knows that, lets give her some time to get rid of the attitude

D Truth:
all this things u saying about Nigeria is tru, they would not send u there.
are u black or white (not discreminating).

She's mixed, half nigerian and half italain (not too sure, but something like that)!

D Truth:
@Cute-ass
Thanks for training Dr Dre and also for not makin it too much. lol

Abi??

Btw, you got my mail?

^^^^ exactly my point dear. Shit happens everyday, everywhere! Actually no where is safer than the other Cos anything can happen

Put your life in the hands of God, he knows best

Iniedo:
I read it today and i put it on my blog so sad am really feeling bad.

Don't cry hun, she'll be back before you know it, you'll see! One year seems a long time, but time does fly Out of sight is not out of mind, for the banishment-time being keep her memory alive by watching her existent movies!!

chiogo:
Am fine, sister. lol How are u doin'? how was work?

Work was tiresome, i'm exhausted *yawns*. Apart form that i'm cool

choongtin:
well am excited but the thing is am scared that i might die or something because have heard lots of storeis about nigeria and how they kidnap people kill them

LOL . . we all live by our destinies, death and kidnap doesn't happen only in Nigeria? you could still be killed in the UK, not?. The train incident that happened in London last year, and the tower incident that happened in the US in 2001, well those victims, if you asked them might still have thought that Nigeria was more dangerous. What i'm trying to say is that no matter where you are, you're still exposed to danger, we just have to pray for long life

In Oslo (capital of Norway), they kidnap and kill people on daily basis too, so??

choongtin:
mosqitoes and insects and gosh hate insects

Darling you just have to get used to them, use preventives and stuff but that will still not keep you 100% protected.

choongtin:
also things like the teachers are really horrible and ignorant,

Well some are, some are not. Just like some teachers in europe are "racists", no place is a bed of roses. I'm sure you won't be the only student in class, so if the teacher is like that, with time you'll start being independent to them as the rest students. Pay your dues (i mean be up and doing in class) and believe me their ignorance and horrible behaviours will be of no consequence to you. You're there to study, nothing else!

choongtin:
also the fact that there is poor eletricity

Yup, poor electricity, but you'll adjust. Take my words. Many before you did And when you start melting into the society, you'll be enjoying yourself so hard that electricity would be the least of your problems. It sucks, i know alright but its not the worst that could happen!

choongtin:
well well well my parents want me to go to nigeria because apparently am "rude" and i dnt know my roots, i dnt know if i am going to like it or not all i need now is the truth about nigeria, i was there once but that was when i was little i can't remember anything, am scared because am staying, for a long time, God knows how long, has anyone been in my situation before or tell me what nigera really is like, i do know a lot about nigeirians but not nigeria

The truth about Nigeria is that with some cash in your pocket to take care of your needs, its the best country in the whole world. Why do you think people on nairaland talk day in day out of things they miss about Nigeria??

Those little not-so-perfect things make it memorable. You can be sure of enjoyment 24/7 Yes i've been in your situation, lots and lots of people i know have been there too. Its a common routine for nigerian families, millions before you and zillions yet to be in the shoe. Parents do it to ensure their kids a disciplined and moralled adult life. Like you said, they think you're rude, now that is something your parents believe is a result of european/american life (kids growing to be wild and nuisances to the community), just trying to protect you from ending up one.

Have an open mind, take it that you're going on a many-years vaccation to a foriegn land, and tell yourself that no matter what you're bent on making the best out of it, and come rain come sun, you're going to have fun. Its actually not as bad as it seems, neither is it as bad as people make it sound. "Whites" that have been there sing praises of our country not to talk of someone that has her roots there??


VERY IMPORTANT WANRNING THOUGH: control your youth, do not let your youth control you. Make good friends, bad friends are dangerous, very dangerous and they'll end up leading you into things you'll regret deeply later. You're new, so it'll be easy for you to fall for anything and anybody esp. when you're parents are not there to guide you. But with the right head on your shoulder, you'll pull through. Be the matured adult they think you can't be.

Just be extremely careful, i wish you all the best Its a story to be told, make it a nice one!!!!

chiogo:
It's funny that they banned her but i noticed that she dresses badly most of the time in her movies(like a hooker or smthin') but that's no reason why they should ban her, though. It's her life!

Yea its her life, but maybe they have standards of clothes they want to be portrayed by different characters of a movie, if she dresses against that standard then i don't blame them. They said it wasn't just her dressing though, wish we could get the whole story

Someone mentioned on this thread that "unilag" students have been banned from wearing certain clothes and after viewing some pics, i'm totally in support.
Now those students own their lives too, but wen they're owning their lives on someone else's boundary, then they just have to take what they get Which is the same in Ini's case. If she owned the movie industry, it would have been a different song, but when she doesn't . .

Btw darling sis. how're you doing today?