₦airaland Forum

mbulela:
Lib dem ke?

Yels ke.

My MP is a lib dem and the man helped me get my daughter into a prefered school when the council flung my child to one yeye school miles away

I also don't pay for school dinner
That was a lib dem policy that the Tories want to poach.

Tuition fees aside they were a moderating factor in this coalition govt.

naijababe:
I had to enter Twitter to see for myself o. @ Ralph Lauren, are you in Scotland?

Chei sleep no be good thing o

I be mrs cynical for my church but I am seriously going to be rolling my eyes at all the 'bragging' that I will be expecting in church tomorrow Some people won't see it as the vote pulling tactic that it is. To them it's the 'status' RCCG has as the most influential black church in the world.Like God recognises the status of your church in your Christian walk

Me and my pastor don fight taya sef on my 'irregular' attendance of FOL.

The Lib Dems are still getting my vote.

naijababe:
Efe, please waste your vote on the SNP if there is a chance to do so

Can we vote SNP in England ni? I thought it was the Scottish Nationalist Party.

Efe is a London chic o

naijababe:
I just might vote SNP all the way. Nicola has been very impressive

She can't stand the Tories as much you do

Unfortunately we can't vote SNP in England. But she really held her own.According to Hubby she won the debate.

edwife:
It's a 'no', I'm afraid lol Ed is a comedian..

He needs to work with someone and for me the best candidate is Nicola,except for the independance issues they do share quite a number of similar goals.

Cameron don run

He does and so far the SNP is the nearest ideological leaning with them (that can actually get enough MPS)

Yea Ed Milliband said No I will not do a deal with SNP

I hope he does not need to go back on his word sha cos I don't think they can win a majority.

Ed Milliband does not like this thing Nicola sturgeon is doing o (at least in public ) That's why he is always saying we want to win a majority

Nicola sturgeon ' I will never ever do a deal with the Tories'

naijababe:
Dami, make I nor lie I was a beneficary of that scheme but honestly is should be scrapped. It's one of the reasons for skyrocketing house prices and to make matter worse, the councils aren't reinvesting the money on building new homes

Hubby too. It was meant to be a way to get on the housing ladder but these days it's just a quick way to flip properties in London esp.I watched a documentary where people on housing benefits wanted to buy their homes Apparently some 'estate agents' were offering them money to exercise their right to buy.This was in London Borough of Chelsea and Kensington so no surprises there

naijababe:
If only the governemnt will smell the coffee and stop selling council homes, taxpayers and basically funding this expensive but ridiculous scheme abd I hear the cons are plannning on extending the scheme to Housing Associations if they win the next election.

I will die first before I vote for the Tories. For the Scottish parliament I am voting the SNP and general election na Lib Dem

It's ridiculous me and hubby were just talking about it. He thinks it should be scrapped.

I don't know how The Tories want to implement the right to buy scheme with Housing Assoc.

Gen gen immigration

Nigel Farage in his element.

edwife:
Yes she is saying all the right things but i also don't trust her.
Dami don't try it o,Ed is trying.

My favorite quote: there is a "total lack of comprehension on the panel" and in the audience Nigel Farage 2015

or this audience is as Left wing as BBC audiences goes.

Though I agree with him a bit the panel is too Left wing joor

My MP is a lib dem and I think he has worked well for his consistuency and served me as my member of parliament so I am voting for him and not the party.

edwife:
Nigel Farage waste no time in bringing immigration issue regarding housing ,he did not even answer like the others.

Talk about solution and stop looking at the whys...

Everything always goes back to immigration with UKIP Sometimes though he is right.

Housing like a lot of pubblic amenities can be strained due to a to high influx of immigrants but his only solution is always leave the EU.

edwife:
Don't mind him,don't fall into his trap

Nicola Sturgeon doing it for me this night.But Ed still my boo

All of them just dey promise promise.

Nicola Sturgeon is doing well but I don't trust the SNP. Scottish independence is still their dream.

She certainly has more charisma than Your boo sha.


I think I am just voting for my MP jare.He is a lib den.

edwife:
Lol,yes

Let's hear their fairytales and promises.

Naijababe edwife David Cameron almost got me with the 30 hrs free childcare thing

Edwife are you watching your boyfriend poor Ed

quivah:
I understand ma...I'm just saying, even a filthy rich man wouldn't carry all the responsibility of his wife's family.

its not worth killing herself over if another guy doesn't come, at least its better than being stuck. but he will come

Which is why I think there is no need for the thread ( hence my saying no need for validation in my first post) She will just get further confused. Because some people (rightly so ) might not see her point and some will applaud her. So why does she not just face up to and stand by the decision she has taken and move on.

Except she is having regrets sha.(which again I am not condemning her for).

Now I am not saying people don't compromise for love( I know men who have relocated for marriage) but its an individual decision that is treated based on your OWN circumstances, ideals etc. I am that I am talking I resigned my job to join my husband in the UK but it was something that was done gradually. I know people both on my side and his that thought why did I go back to Nigeria when my visa expired( I still had a visiting visa) but that was my ideal( I did not want be stuck in the illegal immigrant web) again I am not judging those who do it .We were apart for about 3 years. I still did not resign until I was granted my Spouse Visa(which was Months after our wedding).

I know the issues I had in the early years of marriage esp when I thought I had given up something until I got to the point(or rather matured) where I learnt to stop yearning for what was but enjoy the now while striving to better the future.

Ewuro4:
All of you that quoted my post I only have one response: OK

The point still remained that she neither loved nor trusted the guy , end of.

And it's good to learn that abroad visa is the only ticket to certainty. What do I know, I'm a learner.

But sis if the guy too trusted and loved her why must it resign and pharmacy shop or nothing?

quivah:
I don't see why and how any filthy or no filthy rich man will and should take full responsibility of his wife's family while he's there taking care of his, their children and friends needs.. he will at some point complain bitterly..and yes! I won't blame him. gosh! what have we turned women too useless?!
reasons parents send their daughters (and sons) to school is to be successful,enlightened and be able to take care of their responsibility on them without necessarily depending on some one..any 'someone' else will be an advantage not the original source.
it is hard I must say

My dear I am not saying that they(men) should o I am just emphasising the fact that I kind of understand her predicament. Hard but she has made the decision she felt was best for her and her family at the time. No need to keep overthinking(except deep down she feels she has made a mistake).

Another guy will( or might not) come along.

Edwife spoke my thoughts . There should have been a middle ground esp as the distance in this case was not inter-country. One can even say Owerri and PH are around the same region. I can understand OP fears as the breadwinner in her family. How many men except filthy rich would want to take on their FULL(note I used FULL) responsibility for their wives family?

OP just move and don't seek validation, You have done what you think was right for you at the time.

bukatyne:
I agree that some research bring about advancement especially scientific and technological.

Besides, the OP brought a research conducted in America (no size of the sample population, no measuring index, no period etc.) and brought it to Nigeria where a lot of people are grappling with unemployment and underemployment.

Exactly how we bring AA's problems and try relating it with Nigerian society.

Nigerian women might be 'sadder' than their counterparts 35yrs ago however I will find it extremely difficult that it is because they are climbing the corporate ladder...

The popular ones do not seem sadder as they climb higher

Each to his/her own anyways.

Each to his own indeed.

However as I said in my intial post 'sadness' and 'happiness' are highly subjective and fluid states of mind/terms. There was one research that said Nigerians are the happiest people on earth but one week day in Idumota or Oshodi after having been harassed by car par touts and thoroughly insulted by the angry women who feels you disrupted her biscuit stall that was on the pavement that is meant for walking might leave you wondering where all the happy people are However go to a typical owambe on a Saturday and seeing people dance shoki like their lives depended on it would make you see the truth in that revelation .

Ewuro4:
So lemme get this straight as I can't possibly quote the entire OP, and pls correct my short layman summary if I'm wrong ; So modern day woman's unhappiness nature was because they mumbojumbled men's "God's given duty" with theirs which is to only pop children and cook?

Is that what the 182 back & forth all about?

As a man, I'm guessing you do understand the sense of completeness and accomplishment of your hardwork but what I don't understand is why you want to deny another gender to feel same.

Marriage is not a competition. It's a simple concept of Two heads working TOGETHER. It doesn't matter who rakes the most revenue into the family pot.

I come back from work everyday and yell into thin air 'I Love my life'! , that's how happy I am. My role model is an Alpha male YET would disown me in a flash if I decide to warm couch all day in guise of packing lunchboxes and balancing spreadsheets. I detest it with every molecule in my anatomy. Tuah!

You ehn.

Those 'people'( I don't want to mention the name cos I don't want to derail the thread ) don't warm couches all day o sis. You know I was 'one of them' ;Dfor a while and jokes apart I actually think going to work is easier sometimes.

Stopping off at Costa to get a latte with Boys 2 men in the ears while reading my kindle without hearing' mummy' for the 100th time can be bliss

bukatyne:
@bold true

I can't relate with a lot of these 'researches' jor.

Everyone should do whatever fits them.

You are right.

But we need research to progress civilization sha. A lot of advancements that have been made in the world today is down to research.

Scientific and technological research is a bit more conclusive. The social sciences/arts is a bit more open ended. Some 'researches'( especially if funded by a certain lobby group) tend to support the ideology of those who commissioned it . If a liberal left wing group /a conservative right wing group carry out research on a certain topic more often than not the conclusion on the same issue is always vastly different. e.g. If the Daily W(M)ail carries out research on Immigration, it would say immigrants are a drain on UK infrastructure and if The Guardian Carries out a similar one they would say that Immigrants bring a net benefit to the Uk economy.

So sometimes I dey use one kain eye look at some research.

freecocoa:
The real question should be,why be with a man undeserving of your care?

I mean, if him giving you a ring is all you care about and the yardstick for knowing/measuring a deserving man, then yawa dey o.

Bottomline is, try to be sure you are with a man who genuinely loves you and every other thing will follow.

It is trying to follow a certain guideline to get the ring that has left many women heart broken, be yourself and you'll have no problems, take care of a man who does same for you, husband or not.

Very well said.

bukatyne:
So your documentary says more men are depressed?

Elelehe!

Perhaps the OP can tell us why

I read Some stuffs here and I can't relate to real life.

Going by This thread, I would have thought only women feel fulfilled with Happy families.

Whatever.

Yes the premise was that females tend to feel more at ease talking about their feelings,share (over share sef )their hurts,trials and issues with others (both on a personal and professional level) than men who feel they need to put up a 'tough macho ' front even though they are suffering inside. Women also generally tend to seek professional help with depression than men.


I know researches are not necessarily always the reflection of wider society or life or exhaustive .But think this one is kinda true.Personally I know more young men who have committed suicide than young women. I don't think a truly happy person will be suicidal so that's I said there was a tad bit of over generalisation in the OP.

Funny enough I am watching a documentary right now that is based on research that says more young men suffer from depression and are 3 times more likely to commit suicide than females their age.The study reckons that because society tends to programme men not to talk about feelings or emotions they tend to internalise hurt and that is why they are more suicidal.

'Happiness' is a very vague and fleeting concept so I would say the there might be a tad bit of generalisations.That said though modern life with all its technological advancements in making life easier also has its attendant stresses esp in the west. You should have seen me panicking when I thought I would be unable to pick my son on time this evening.I am sure my blood pressure went up a notch If it was the old days we would be at the farm together or there would be a horde of relatives who would pick him up for me. And that is for someone who is married to a hands on man.

All in all except for the subset of women for whom career is EVERYTHING(and I am not saying that's a bad thing) work life balance is the key.And I think work life balance is essential for everyone not just women.

These are just a few pictures of how it looks.Not too sure of your location but mothercare stocks it. Try any other good mother and baby retailer. Or maybe some bigger pharmacies.

RashMe:
Yes, its pelvic pain combined with d injections I was given earlier

Then it is most likely is Pelvic Girdle Pain.. Sorry dear see your doctor and ask him for ways to manage the pain. Also ask if you can get the belt I spoke about will post a link or picture if I can find one. It really helps.

@ op is the pain around your pelvis? It could be pelvic girdle pain. I had it with my second pregnacy and it does cause limping. It was really bad and walking was really painful that I had to stop work at 7 months(with my previous I worked till about 8 days before delivery)


If it is really bad and PGP you could try seeing a physiotherapist.There is also this support belt that you could wear around your lower abdomen that helps with the pain.

Unfortunately if it is Pelvic girdle pain there is no clear cut way to stop until after delivery.So your doctor might be right. It's a condition that affects some women and is caused by a wide range of factors which includes the pregnancy hormones and the fact that the weight of the baby is pressing on your lower body.

Seek a second opinion though for your own peace of mind and see if you can be referred to a physioterapist. I wanted to try osteopathy but by the time I was able to get an appointment ,baby had been born.

There are some really severe cases and I remember reading about a woman that was wheelchair bound till delivery. I think that is called another name can't remember.

You can check on webmd or nhs.co.uk symptom checker p.s checking online does not mean you should still not seek a second medical opinion.

Happy weekend everyone

Kaboninc ntoor

I sincerely hope this children are returned home hale and hearty without any long lasting psychological trauma I can't just even begin to imagine the 11 month old without his mum( one of mine was still breast feeding at that age).

I hope the police can crack this ring ASAP because if not sadly these children might not be the last.

Pickabeau the comment/ad above yours had me laughing so hard don't want to quote without patronising

Probably thinks the Dudu by nature like yours truly who are moaning on this thread need help unfortunately I spend less than £10 a month on moisturisers (cocoa and Shea butter) so no market here.

Nice business sense sha must be an ijebu person like me

K

Ewuro4:
I didn't do anything dear and I'm sorry.

Just hear him out first.


#CC I miss you

cc.. Toonoisy ,Lyndaroyce, Tayour, Greatgod2012, Madame, Bebe2, Naijababe, Damiso, Efemenaxy, Edwife , coogar, TV01, Peakabeu(?) , Bellong

I honestly don't know what to say sis....others have given good advise though and that is to have a talk with him.