MrBrownJay1: whether a man has money or not is IRRELEVANT to who has control in a r/ship... African society/culture and religion is very adamant about it. if you are a man, then you are the head of the family, whether you earn more than your wife and/or you are unemployed.
nobody, and i repeat, NOBODY should ever date/marry a woman who is A) disrespectful and or B) abusive physicaly/verbally to her man.... whether you are rich or broke. if that woman has a problem with you being the head of the family, tell her to go argue her case with Nigerian culture/society/religion.
you look for women who are respectful, caring, understanding etc and stop dating/marrying these liability women who value men upon how much money they have. if your woman's respect for you and your family is down to how much money you can bring, then that woman is a liability and should be discarded asap!
How can you tell whether a woman will disrespect you before you marry her?
Set priorities and realize that no one will check all the ridiculous boxes that we create to assess marital partners.
Also realize that women want financial stability and men want youthful wives. So if you're a man who keeps chasing women instead of building economiy wealth, you'll be disadvantaged. Same is a woman above 25 who keeps pursuing career goals to the exclusion of marriage.
And finally: you can want whatever it is that you want (seven packs, seven figures, seven inches) but can you get it?
Zigzagman: In Nigeria and across Africa today, women today are struggling to find men who earn as much as they do.
According to the young women in the trending video below, a good man is hard to find, especially in this economy. There is a shortage of economically attractive men and this has contributed to battles for control in relationships in which the women outearn their men.
Although we like to think marriage is based on love, they say, it “also is fundamentally an economic transaction,” and women want partners whom they can call their equals.
Two of the women on the panel confessed they'd fought with their partners, exchanging blows over money and control.
So, here are the questions for discussion within this thread:
1. Does a “lack of good jobs” for men contribute to loss of male control in a relationship?
2. Have you been in a romantic relationship in which a partner who had economic power over you, was tempted to control you or abuse you physically or verbally?
Jman06: Don't mind those career ladies. They'll continue getting used and dumped by men because they are fvcked up mentally regarding marriage.
Women should understand that the price they have to pay for seeking and gaining equal opportunities with men in education and employment is that they've got to give up hypergamy, otherwise, they'll continue to remain unmarried even in their 40s.
Some of this problems can never be solved. Every generation will forget some of the lessons advocated by that video and the clock starts all over again.
I just pity those who end up with the so called 'rejects' because you'll realize it's not love but fear that drives their decision
Quality20: Are they not supposed to be happy that their wives are not asking them for every penny they need?
The problem is, the more money a woman makes over her man, the more she begins to think she doesn't need her husband. That was included in the research they referenced.
Quality20: How can u be saying this even u refused advising men in the past to marry those ladies when they were 25 n younger? Abeg no pour sand for the garri of those ladies who are 30 and older
dealslip: Some of you are just really bitter people who think women are piece of wood with no direction for their life. If I told you to see women as fellow human being don't you think that is my mindset already. I believe you are not even married, yet you know people's type immediately. That's what we are telling you to stop seeing everyone through the prism of their body - see you talking about short, ugly, broke, rich. Stop seeing people by their looks and pocket.
I wish everyone could follow your advice. Unfortunately, we live in a world where people are judged by their utility. Young, pretty, slim women have an advantage in the dating pool.. so do accomplished, good looking men.
The summary of the video in this post is that people should take a hard long look at the point in life where they are, and make decisions that will hold up for years to come.
If you're young and pretty with tons of suitors, get the best deal you can, because the suitor pool will start to dry up as you get older.
Same for men. Young, unaccomplished men can't compete with wealthy older men in the marriage marketplace. Let each person tell him/herself the truth and live with the consequences of his actions/inactions.
Me too. I am interested in your take on the video particularly because you must be a very insightful person.
I wish I could take your post up there and convert into a cell broadcast. There's so many of my siblings who would have benefited from talking to someone like you years ago
Quality20: Maybe he was told that women from ur tribe ate too wise or easily prone to hookup. For instance, we from our side hardly marry from Benue or southern Kaduna because of their free prodtitution culture