₦airaland Forum

Why Nigerians like to paint their country people back is what I don't understand

How can you assumed that everyone here is criminal?

Why do we quick to say negative things about the people and you except other countries to see positive things here

Redeemed our image by seeing positive things and saying out loud

There are good and bad people in every country just that Nigerians like to only focus on negative things

#sayingpositivethings start with me

Good for them

May Almighty God Strengthen you Amen. Quick recovery

WomaninherPrime:
Good evening house. Kindly read patiently. I promise to be as honest as possible.

I'm a young woman in her mid-20s. I've been in three relationships so far... two were sexual, and one was purely celibate, though it didn't last beyond 6 months.

I recently got out of a 2-yr relationship with Dubem when we discovered our genotype isn't compatible. But the problem is that we're still doing a lot of back and forth. Dubem wants the relationship to continue because he's working on how we'd have our babies via IVF or chorionic villi testing to first determine the sex of the baby.

This has put me in a very confusing situation because I'm unable to move on while he's still holding on for us... and at the same time, I just keep thinking about how life would be a lot easier if I'd just marry a genotype compatible man and have children the regular way without the stress and huge financial cost of an IVF.

To fully move on from Dubem, I started seeing other people..

Nedu is a very great guy... has everything I want in a man, but he's having some financial challenges right now. He's cute, godly, very intelligent, good humour, communicates very well, respectful, sound family values, neat, and seems to me like someone who can take charge of his home. But his financial situation gives me cause for concern... he doesn't seem like he'd be comfortably ready to start a family in another 2/3 years. But that aside, his condition just dampens my enthusiasm to even visit him or start a committed relationship with him. No TV or fridge in his apartment. I feel embarrassed/sorry for him when he has to go watch TV at his friend's or neighbour's... Or I'm thinking of cooking stuff to take to him... but no fridge to store. Joykiller. Or the fact that he can't be a support system to me at the moment...

There's also Victor who comes off as a great guy but I've refused to pay him enough attention all these months because I'm still entangled with Dubem. Victor is doing quite well, and is passionate about his job, but he likes to talk about himself way too much, and seems a bit arrogant. The vibes I get off him is that he tries to be at his best behaviour when he's with me, just to impress, but maybe he's real. While I don't like like him at the moment, I feel if I gave him a chance, I'd see some other aspects of him that would make me love him.

There's Denver on the other hand. Denver is an absolute gentle man... and doing fairly well with his business. I almost said yes to him, but I felt it was coming from the place of pressure. He was putting me under a lot of pressure to say yes... he wants to get married in a minute, but I'm still not resolved on marrying him. Plus he's from a polygamous family, and his plan is for us to live in his disputed family house if/when we get married, and I feel that comes with a lot of drama. Also, he's a bit lackadaisical about his wellbeing. He doesn't seem very tidy. His car always has things strung about. I worry, too about his level of education. He has just a HND and is not in the corporate world whereas I have serious plans to get either a double masters plus lots of certifications or a Ph.D I fear there might be some sort of incompatibility years down the line. Other than these concerns, Denver is a great guy.

Then there's Bright... I've known Bright since I was in uni... he was planning a surprise engagement once, when we weren't even dating. He's the most inconsistent and confused man I've ever met. He's consistent for a aweek or two, then goes off-radar only to resurface again after a few months. But somehow he seems to believe I'm the one who's never agreed to take him seriously. But how do I take a man who's inconsistent seriously? Ideally, he shouldn't be on this list because I long cancelled him... but he called this morning and we had a very long conversation... which was short of him pleading that I calm down and take him seriously so we can move to the next level.

Now the reason I created this thread. I like having a linear focus when I'm in a relationship, but I'm unable to leave Dubem because all these other guys have one issue or the other. No, I'm not looking for a perfect guy. Dubem isn't perfect, but we've come a long way, and we love each other, and we've come to accept and understand each other as we are.
I've become impatient... I feel like I'm at the prime of my life as a woman, and I have other suitors to choose from but I'm holding on to a very precarious relationship. Dubem might as well just wake up one day and decide that our genotype incompatibility is a big deal and we should see other people... at that time, one year of my life would have gone by...these great guys would have probably moved on, too. A woman's hotcake period is fleeting. For my personal plans, I'd love to be married by next year.


Ohh. I mentioned the thing about my two sexual relationships because I made a hasty vow to God once that I wouldn't have sex with more than two men before getting married. I don't know ...God is a merciful God, yeah...But that vow still pops up in my mind now and again. So I can't go into any careless relationship, and now I can't choose.

I'm honestly confused �.

[color=#000099][/color] op please you need a break to clear your mind from all these things. First go on break for good one month and during this break don't call or pick call from them (inform them that you will like to be alone during this period)
Use this period to pray to God your heavenly father he will come to aid. Believe me

lacasera14:
In the bid to get out of your confusion, you ended up confusing everyone. It is well.

[color=#000099][/color] that is.. I don't even know where to start

hashtagged:
Thats what women are meant to be, so if women arent slaves, men shouldnt be breadwinners, you put it like women doing house work is slavery, the men doing the breadwinning what is that called?

In a home

A womans job: cooking, caring for kids, child bearing, maintaning the home

A mans job: breadwinning, making money and provision for the family.

Isnt it balanced, OP you are just a simp, ass licking women wont get you anywhere, so you want men to make money and care for the home as women sit down and watch you(their slave) do everything up to washing their undies. Nonsense

[color=#000099][/color] But you will also want the woman to get a job and support the family financially

Nuel19:
Oponu Oshi, I thought you guys said you're sophisticated not knowing you people are actually SUFFERSTICATED.

Sit there and be talking rubbish, the Chinese are making their way into Lagos and Ogun states where there are factories and govt owned assets.

You're no longer safe, if I were you, I would sharpally relocate to benin republic to avert the calamity that's about to befall you and your people.

When the Igbos were saying no to Buharis re election you and your people were busy chanting "Sai Baba, 4+4+4, and Eko Oni Baje".

[color=#000099][/color] lol you guys will not kill me oooo

[/color][quote author=Exodora post=92328278]You said real probably she is a Muslim but not a real one .
Tonto Dike and her likes are all Christians but not real christians ?[/quo[color=#550000]te]. � Thanks for that reply

I love this woman. She is very hard working and intelligent. She's my name sake I know one day I will attend if not more than her in life so God help me Amen

Our God is wonderful indeed

[quote author=MummyIMadeIt post=92248829][b]This nation has bigger problems, so many complains, but her leaders always get away with luxuries at the expense of her citizens foolery.

This is so un-warranted, I wonder what message and attributes are been passed unto the people..

What's the essence of Calm down?

All for show off!!

So many children are in the streets, orphanage homes, malnutritioned, abused and so much more who deserve help but nothing as such..



Please calm down

[quote author=juvewalex post=92234134]We nor serious for this country I swear.


Calm down

Chinkos99 Our company recently employed this guy, we worked in the same company before, then he was a manager and i was a junior staff.

I left the company years ago and joined another, so few months ago he got employed in my new office as a Director.

When he resumed, being that i knew him before, i started playing around with him, like when he was introduced to us, i was like oo, common, i hug him tightly and people were surprise at our closeness before i informed them that we have worked together before.

I am a jovial person, so each time i go around his office, i will call him boyfriend, my love, hope no girl is trespassing cos i will fight o and his subordinates will laugh and say you are not serious.

On the job, we get to work together at times cos i am a Manager now, we go for meetings etc, then some of his job includes doing some short production, even though i am not employed as a video producer, i told him i can do those for him personally, cos i recently learn those, he was surprise before but he decided to give me a try, i did it for him and he liked it, he became close and said i was helping him solve alot of problems.

Recently when he comes to my office, he will ask my PA where is my woman and that one will laugh knowing i started it but i just thought that was it though.

So last month when we went to the Palms Mall, to seek for permission to film their facilities in the short production work we had, we were together then he decided to do some shopping, i helped him carry the things he bought and just had fun, he took me to shoprite and ask me to shop, i just pick two things, drink and rice and he said is that all i said yes, he started showing me things, take this, take that i said i was okay, that it wasnt appropriate to come here and start shopping like its month end. So we left, in the car he said, you do have some very good attribute girl, i said like what, he said never mind and we drove off.

After that he started asking if we can have lunch but most time our lunch time dont sync, so i told him not to worry, then he asked for a dinner, i close late, im a workaholic, so most times i will agree but i will work till 9pm and he would have waited and get tired and left.

Finally i get to have a dinner date with him and he ask if we could do this more often, i said why not boyfriend jokingly, the next time we were having dinner, I said boyfriend let me greet that guy there, i really needed to meet him, he has a contact i need for work, he held me and said you call me boyfriend jokingly, i want you to mean it lol.

After i met with the guy, he started telling me how he loved me and how he will really love us to be in a relationship, he doesnt expect a yes and he knows its so wrong on all level because we work in the same place, but i can think about it and give him a response later that he will respect any decision i make.

I said thank you o, but since then, dude is so soft and nervous when he sees me, i can see the butterflies even when we are in a client meeting.

Even though he tries not to make it obvious at work, after work he is all over me

Last night we were together, i told him i am scared as he is almost 40 and not married, that i believe any guy who gets to that age, with enough money but has not married is a play boy lol. He couldn't say a word for like some minutes then he said, yes i am old enough to have been married and i had relationships, beautiful relationships with wonderful women, some didn't work because of my mistakes and because of things i neglected and some didn't work because it was not meant to work, but above all have learnt alot to be at least a better man and i am ready to make it work this time i promise, i have no doubt if you are the right girl because have known you for long and have never had a second thought about my woman, so forgive me for not making it work all these while, i want to make it right this time - MEHN THOSE WORDS RINGS IN MY HEAD LIKE KILODE, i loved the fact that he didnt put the blame on the ladies he's dated.

Now on my own side, I do not feel anything for him but i like him alot, i like that we should be hanging out, go out, do dinner and talk from morning tonight but i do not feel anything aside that. What do you guys advise.


What happened to the "marry your best friend"

Is like asking your elder to stand for you to sit is awkward
What I see here is cat and dog even before this event

For young boys and girls out there looking for these opportunities.... Destiny helper will locate you through Christ our Lord Amen

Chai see love. Love is a beautiful thing but seriously I can't do that

Whatever you do specially violent like this one please don't do it in front of your children. They learn very fast

Most important is that he delivers.

Our politicians with their selfish interest. It is well they can say or do undoable just to achieve their goal. Edo people vote the right person oooo

This politics everyone is going where he/she can be favored

[quote author=fwzolamide1 post=92110954]I'm still an undergraduate, I will hustle like the way you did throughout your service.
1) You have 500k . My brother you can start with a small scale business with 50k. E.g. buying Nigerian rice , beans and water melon onion from northern part of Nigeria,for instance you would buy rice @ 17 transport 1 k per bag , and be you seselli it @retail / wholesales price.
2 You can also do a live stock agriculture , which you would start buying, ram, goat cow, pig fog, rabbit , even snail.
3) is paga, data selling, cable subscription , collecting daily contribution,but it is not profitable.
My brother start that no 1 and no 2.
You can start both with 150k. Keep the remaining 350




Do you know how to start that 1 and 2 you mentioned above like where in northern part or any body into it that can guide me.

[quote author=engrkaz post=92043046]6 years older, extremely independent single mom of 2. First child is already a 400L university student. I just might pay her bride price.[/quote


That's good

[quote author=proxillin post=91987252]Make i no lie you, I still habour hate for her. U got me there. I remember those disgrace everyday.
At times, I mistreat her, she will go and still come back..

she wont just go away.

I was in love with her until I got to know her personality. I still remember those moment I fantasize about her. Her physique, beauty and all The moment that made me approach her. I think thats what is keeping me with her.[that's the problem]

Odoctor:
Listen bro, don't dump her. Ladies atimes reason that way. She may love you truly but imature in going about her material needs.

Just test her faithfulness and love by sending this msg:

"happy birthday sweetheart. May God grant you long life and prosperity, good health and more knowledge of him. How I wish I can get you Te best of gifts today, but financial constraints cannot allow me. But surely, the future is bright. Pls manage this 400 airtime"

Then u send her the 400 airtime. Her words, body language, attitude and reactions onwards will tell alot about her marriageability.

Pls quote me, and give me feedback.

Thank you.

Supported

Chai laugh out loud it is well

What is going on nah girls this girls that, women this woman that.
Are our men getting too lazy that they can no longer work hard to take care of their women. So you will rather date or settled down with someone you are not compatible with just because she's independent
Oh I will not blame you guys is because of situation of this country that is causing this

That I'm alive today is miracle from my Father in heaven, good health, my career, everything about me today is miracle from Father

Adunny07:
Please I just really need someone to talk to about this and I will like your candid advise..

So since my older sister got married I always come to her house and spend few weeks or months and go back. Al·through my university days, whenever school is not in session I always come down here to spend time with her and her husband.

Truth be told the husband is a very nice man and has helped me always financially, anytime I come here once my sister welcomes me the first day like this, from the second day she leaves all her house chores for me, I mean everything and she just relaxes. At times I get really tired and don't even feel like doing those chores but because most times when I come visiting she is heavy ( pregnant) so most times I just help her...

Thing is my sister doesn't appreciate all my effort, most times she complains self its the hubby that tells her that I am hardworking and at least she should give me credit for all I do.

Now the reason why am writing this is because am done with service (NYSC) and as it is its like I have to stay in her house because the state where she stays has more job opportunities compared to where our parents live... She stays in Abuja...I have been down with malaria for few days now and I have been on treatment, just because I can't do certain house chores because am not too strong my sis started complaining saying I can't be living in her house and be waking up whenever i like... Mind you I was always the first that wakes up when I wasn't sick, in fact I will wash the dishes, sweep, mop daily, cook food, bath her children and all those things.

The only thing she does is to bath her youngest baby, but now because for these few days she has been doing those work I do daily she is already saying she can't tolerate me sleeping and not waking up on time.

My question is this, does she have the right to be so angry at me because she is doing her house chores? I feel its her house and so she doing her house chores herself shouldn't be a problem since am not too strong to help her do it. She herself just sweep and doesn't mop, but she expects me to sweep and mop everyday.

Should i just go back to my parents house and get a job there? Me renting my own house is not an option because am a lady and am just 22...

Please i need you guys advice, what can I do?

My dear for you to get something you must sacrifice something, and this is what you must sacrifice for you to get that dream job. Please come down she is your elder sister for goodness sake is you that will serve her not the other way around.

You need her for now so you have to do her bidding she is your sister. Whatever you need to do to stay in her house in other to get the job do it. Some people went through the same process your own won't be different. You should thank God that she allowed to stay in her house. Just 22 and you are feeling this way haba.

Modify

Get a skill why waiting for job so that you will not always be available

Toks2008:
The outward beauty of a woman is measured by the degree to which it is aesthetically pleasing or beautiful in terms of sexual attractiveness or desirability. However, every lady is relatively attractive in a very unique way but there is no denying the fact that whilst some ladies are conspicuously attractive, some are just average in standard outward beauty assessment...

Nevertheless, I strongly believe that there are huge benefits for ladies with average physical beauty cos in most cases...

1. Most guys prefer to marry them.

2. They are more emotionally and physically available.

3. They give their men peace of mind cos they are naturally submissive and loyal.

4. Academically they are mostly at the top of their game and rarely get tangled in sex for grades since lecturers don't find them too attractive.

5. One fact no one can dispute is that they make it better in life cos they work extra hard with their brains...little wonder why most of the great achievers are of average beauty.

6. They are more productive cos they don't slay on social media or offline and are less prone to depression over lack of likes over their pics or display of nudity.

7. They usually have very good character and other great qualities the very attractive ladies lack...

8. Cheaper to maintain cos they don't get obsessed with trying to outlook other ladies in looks or spend foolishly on cosmetic enhancement...

9. They have very high self-esteem and confidence in themselves cos they don't have the pressure or fear over their beauty fading away...they have come to understand that "Lookism" is essentially the same as racism or sexism and nothing to do with reality at all So they care less what people think or say about how they look.

10. They are very good in the bedroom act. Whilst most very attractive ladies can be very boring in bed because they don't want to be roughly handled, the ladies with average physical beauty care less and would throw all caution to the wind ... I guess it is a way of making up for not being too hot and this is why many men find them sexually irresistible.

Do you agree with these?

N.B : This is a fun thread so no spoilers biko.

There's an an atom of truth in this but not all

Chai some people self

I'm ashamed with this kind of news from villa

[b][/b]

pocohantas:
And for ladies reading this, if you really desire marriage- BY ALL MEANS GO FOR IT.

I have seen men who said they are not interested in dating, they want courtship and marriage. 6mth-1yr. No one called it DESPERATION.

Men cannot be DESPERATE,
They only know what they want.

When it is a woman, it becomes DESPERATION.

If you want to marry in record time, leave guys in their 20s. Go straight to 33 and above. Trust me, their “DESPERATION“ would match yours.

I have friends, guys in their 30s with good jobs and one thing is common- THEY ALL WANT TO GET MARRIED.

One would even tell me “I am desperate. If I see a perfect one, I am marrying”. I will tell him I can’t see the desperation, he will tell me to shun.

Some girls are “lucky“ to meet men at this point, so they don’t have to be DESPERATE. You will see that same guy who dated his EX for 6yrs, get married to another lady in 3months.

Once again, if you desire marriage in record time, follow your heart and go for it.

These same guys will call you evening newspaper when you are 30.

There is nothing wrong with being VERY-pro marriage. Let no one blackmail you into running his model all because he is NOT ready. You don’t want to meet a man who is VERY ready, when you are not ready as a woman.

Go for what you want!