₦airaland Forum

damiso:
Very very well. Went to Nigeria so my exercise and food was disrupted a bit but I was able to manage my portions.have had a couple of 'off' days but as its a lifestyle change I quickly make amends.

My mum is so worried about me she thinks I look ill. I kept getting 'see all your bones' 'what is this ' . I never realised how much leaner I was until I had to put on a wrapper.

I have more 2 more KG to get to my target weight. I run a bit less now though and do a mix of abs/core,Strength training ,legs etc routines. I just find it harder to get motivated to hit the pavement when it's dark outside

Pic below is my progression from March up until September (L to R) and I am even leaner now.

Mama mia!! You look sexy girl!!

Damiso, I am so impressed. Well done to you and for keeping it real by understanding off-days / setbacks do happen but you always get right back up on that horse and continue. Determination & Consistency. You can never go wrong with that. Lovely pics. Me likey da one on da far right.

Hot mama.

bellong:
Are you sure it was his sister that called or he saved the number with my sister...

Bellong!

Smile4mee01:
I am a little depressed now. i came here to seek counsel. i am 31 yr old male, works in a bank. have my own apartment and car, Quite comfortable. i am not and never have been in a very serious relationship. the few ones i tried never just works out. most times the ladies dont measure up, the few ones that did measure up were so much in a hurry to marry (maybe because they were older than i was sha)
my friends too wonder, they say with my status ladies should be all over me. they say i dont take them serious. i am not gay and wil never be.
i agree my job leaves me little room to go out because i work almost every day. in fact in a whole month i have just 2 free weekends. 2 days out of which i still go to work.
is there something i can do to be in a healthy relationship. i desire to have a balance.
Thanks in anticipation

Maybe it's time you lowered your expectations. You probably also see yourself as being (for want of a better expression) "all that", while they think otherwise.

Mindfulness:
Do you mind telling me how you managed to have a baby with someone without noticing that they are not so clean?

@op: abeg start by answering this query first. The advice you seek depends on your response.

How could you miss knowing how dirty she was whilst climbing atop her?

beaubod:
Sis in law called my hubby last night and his response, "I'll call u back, am not where I can talk now". I felt insulted so I spoke so his sis could hear dat am d one there wt him. She cut off d phone and I believed they went chatting.
Few minutes later, another call, they started petty talk and he stood up from d sitting room entered d room closed d lobby door, closed d room door and entered d bathroom! Just cos he doesn't want me hearing there discussion. What's that!
When they were through, he started teasing and romancing me cos he clearly saw I was annoyed.
It's painful cos am so free I discuss everything going in my own family wt him.
Shouldn't he at least find a time when am not around to discuss thrr issue instead of making me feel like an outsider.
Am I overreacting or something

Well, you could download software from the internet to use in monitoring and eavesdropping on his calls. He'll be none the wiser.

See? life doesn't have to be that difficult.

babygirlfl:
coco read between the lines. Same old trick to teach married women how to take care of the man or someone else comes and does the job the wife refused to do.

Lmao!!

Yeah, we already knew that from the beginning. Just going with the flow.

It's an enjoyable story na,innit? I don't think Hints! was ever this good. Not by a long shot.

@op: ignore all dem haters on this thread. May the force be with you.

Mindfulness:
I am EXTREMELY happy with myself and so I have a lot of support to offer, tell me when you need it.

You are such a naughty stirrer. Good morning.

Godmother:
I probably should, but I never did as I never got involved with an inlaw . If I had I probably would have tackled my parents on it and insisted on having my way.

They do dig around to make sure the parties aren't related. That, I know - especially if the intendeds come from the same village.

Frommena:
No one is judging her, im thinking of the whole situation where she is in too.

She isn't your concern.

You, on the other hand, are her concern. You're a threat. And a dangerous one because it's just a matter of time before you start entertaining thoughts of how to get rid of the "competition".

Godmother:
In my place (I'm from Ovu close to warri and Agrara-oto(maternal) ) and a lot other urhobo villages I know of, its a taboo to marry an in-law, whether the inlaw is a close one like a brother-in-law or distant. My mum used to drum it into our ears growing up.

You should have asked her "why" though. I'm curious to know what makes it taboo, and what tradition says will happen if one commits this taboo.

bellong:
[size=3pt]Nah... She was accused of being Carefreewannabe... And this is not Ileoba's writing style.[/size]

[size=1pt]Pls, when you do find Ileobatojo, give me a shout. I miss her like crazy.[/size]

Godmother:
Dunno o, its just that way o

I'm Isoko and I've never heard of this.

@op: how did you reach the conclusion that they're identical twins? That certainly wasn't implied in the facebook comment.

Besides, one is visibly taller than the other.

Godmother:
Some cultures permit it. I think some parts of igbo are more flexible in this regard, but for a lot other tribes, its a big No-No. In urhoboland, you can't even think of it sef let alone try to carry it out.

Why not?

Captainswag225:
i dont know some people define love,,., they even see abuse as love,,, we should learn to draw e line btn love and violence. To e father's issue, i still hold him partly responsible for her death coz he should have at some point reported it to the cops. Since his daughter wasnt seeing reason he should have taken the neccesary action. Rip to the lady btw.

Yes, he should have.

In matters concerning life & death, you take firm actions and not dice around with indecisions. Life has no duplicates.

Sad story though, but hopefully, lessons have been learnt. Divorce is NOTHING compared to death.

armyofone:
I was wondering too. No blood ties, why not.
Just move far away and live your life.

Agreed.

thelish:
u help me pour my mind here o. This raining season, if u see people trekking inside mud under d rain, the only thing u wish for at dat particular time is" if only say I get car" car is a necessity for me, don't know bout others though.

Soooo true. Owning one shouldn't even be a topic for debate. It's a necessity.

apexquest:
Firstly I have revived my broiler poultry business so that the profit increases my income source. I Currently have 200 broiler birds being raised for this Xmas.

Secondly, my car has helped in alleviating a lot of stress like packing wood shavings to the farm, buy many bags of feed n other local runnings..

Thirdly I plan to fix my accommodation in 3 months time n discuss with my fiancee bout moving getting married further by a year.

Thanks for the advice. .

You're welcome. And good to know everything's on track.

CassieV:
Glad I came across this thread, I've been trying to loose weight and start eating healthy but it's so darn hard.. What do I do

Nothing good comes easy, CassieV. Start nice & easy.

Welcome

damiso:
Biko efe was that chicken cooked. I can just about do raw veg/smoothies but I draw the line at meat

Lol! I think it was.

Either way, t'was really tasty. And healthy. Anyway, how've you been mami? And more importantly, how've your exercise regime and clean eating been going?

Shiningmama:
So sorry for replying late, I've been so busy coupled with sickness. I was really sick for some weeks.
About my shop, I really want to bless God for his faithfulness.. got some people patronising me. At least for a start I am grateful to God.. though electricity is a major problem now.

Been wondering where you've been.

Sorry to hear you were ill. Hope you're better now? Good to know things have started picking up for you. Small baby steps - and you WILL get there eventually. Well done.

Sounds like you need a small, portable generator though. How much does one cost, Shiningmama? And secondly, do you have a separate bank account for your business? One which no-one else but you has access to?

lofty900:
do you have to quote everything to advise a hubby snatcher? Lol

"Revenge" eh, Lofty?

My condolences Mayfrank.

We'll always have questions on why our loved ones leave us when they do, but God knows best. Take heart and never stop forging ahead with life.

May your mum's beautiful soul rest in perfect peace.

Captainswag225:
not them but online support groups, ngo committed to helping victims of domestic violence, such people give genuine advice and not family and friends

Oh, okay. That's good then.

Captainswag225:
oh my word, so the dad is partly responsible for her death. Such attitudes must change, divorce is not a sin so divorcing an abuser shouldnt be frown upon by family and friends of victims of abuse. Life is important than it all

You're misinterpreting his post.

He said the lady's dad was aware of the abuse she was being subjected to, and advised her to LEAVE. She insisted on remaining, in the hope that her abusive husband would change.

Important lesson: It's foolhardy to think one can change another person. A person only changes when they themselves make that decision to change - and not because someone else want / expects them to.

RIP to the deceased lady.

thorpido:
For now,the support they can get will have to be groups against violence in marriages and women who have been through such.

That's a good one. I totally agree with you on this.

Captainswag225:
why yes and no?

Because even though I believe in second chances, it really depends on the circumstances surrounding the abuse / the level of abuse (not an excuse though).

Say for example, due to a spouse's rage / fit of anger, the partner sustains life-threatening or permanent damages. D'you think there should be room for any second chances? It is a lot more complex than just a simple "yes" or "no". The mitigating factors should be seriously taken into consideration.

Captainswag225:
why yes and no?

Yeah.

Captainswag225:
well society can let people down at times but there are other support groups that victims could go to for help rather than keeping it to themselves.

What support groups?

The spouses' family? Surely you know they'll tell them (the woman) to just "manage and bear" her cross by fasting and praying?

The church? Same thing as this ^^

The police? It won't be the first time they've said things in line of, "na domestic matter - make una settle amongst una selves".

The woman's "friends"? I already touched on that.

thorpido:
So true @ bolded.Society believes if she's divorced,then she's not a good woman and a patient one.
Many landlords don't want to let out their houses to divorced women also because they assume they are unstable.

My points precisely.

Divorcees need support. Unfortunately, that's the last thing our judgmental society would offer such people.

Captainswag225:
yep it does. Do u believe in second chance for abusers?

Yes and No.