₦airaland Forum

correct me if i am wrong, but is in not a 'black thing'? I have always wondered about the similarities btw naija yabbin and some black Americans/Caribean people. Comedians like Eddie, Chris Rock, Tucker, Bernie Mac (RIP) always yabbed people in their jokes. Listening to the typical american rap songs, tv shows, documentaries, movies, etc, the blacks are always at each other as well as the white guys - and anyone else that happens to rub them the wrong way!

What would you say about this?

Sholeyb:
I would start by saying that if this is the true version of events you are a victim of domestic violence/ abuse and you are not at fault no matter what anybody says. The person who abuses another is the one at fault, is it ok for me to kill somebody because they abused my mother? No, I will be sent to jail for it, or is it right to defraud someone of their money because they are greedy or have too much money anyhow? Wrong. So please do not let anyone tell you that it is your fault, that is rubbish.

I deal with victims of DV and it always starts with one incident and escalates further. I do not advocate that you divorce your husband, however you must recognise that this is a serous matter.
I am not of the opinion that you apologise and leave it at that, if you are a Christian apologise for the way you spoke to him but insist that he seeks counselling either from a professional or the church.

There must have been traces of this in his character before you got married but you probably ignored it, I am telling you for a fact that unless the Holy Spirit gets a hold of him, this will continue.

Please start to pray and seek help from a TRUSTED CHRISTIAN( no need confiding in someone who will tell the whole world your biz or does not have faith in God that he can heal your marriage)

God bless

Correct analysis!

The affected people and/or their friends should stand outside the embassy in which this diplomat is situated with plackards, VERY LARGE PLACKARDS.
Once BBC or CNN or any international media carries the headlines, Nigeria will have no other option but to remove the man. .
Shebi dem want make we shame ourselves first na!

I agree with Mark with my mind, body and soul, however, that does not mean i agree with the 419 boys sha!

@sholasys
@ Epiphany. Your calculus of  moral faculty of thinking is low. Indeed You lack cultural acumen. Your type cannot make a home. Are you Oyibo. Idiot. U fit count how many divource and collapes marriage in that Oyibo land. Ode

O boy, i am an Avrican man to the core, REAL AFRICAN, BORN AND BROUGHT UP IN NIGERIA. i grew up in a house where my dad NEVER EVEN RAISED HIS VOICE AT MY MOM, because he is a very educated man who knows that the woman is meant to be a partner in the home and not a servant or student.

I am a happily married man and have been for the past 4 years. We lived together in Nigeria for the first 3 years. I have never, and will never raise my voice at my wife, no matter what she does. She has upset me so many times - just like i assume i have upset her countless number of times. That has never made both of us resort to insults or worse still, physical assault. We both understand that it takes two to make a marriage work.

The same way you are resorting to hurl insults at me because you probably do not understand my arguement in favour of the poster, is the same way her husband resorted to slapping her. Probably, if i was near you at the time you read my reply, you would have SLAPPED ME TOO!

As far as i am concerned, under no circumstance in this world, should a man lay a finger on his wife. That is not acceptable. I dont care whether he is or was going through a tough patch or whether he lost his job - he should never, NEVER slap you, his wife, regardless of what you do. Once a man slaps or lays a finger on his wife and there are no repercussions, HE WILL CONTINUE TO DO IT. Prepare yourself for more beatings - if you dont stand your ground now.

I would advice you to STOP apologizing to him (since you have already done so) and do what you can to maintain and take care of yourself an honest way. Start praying about it (if you are a prayerful person) and ignore him. If there is a little food in the house, feed him. Clean the house, make the beds etc etc - continue doing your wifely duties for as long as you can. If money finish for house and there is no food, THEN THERE IS NO FOOD UNTIL HE GIVES YOU MONEY!

Haba! To be a woman does not mean that you should be a slave or that you should be foolish. If na oyibo land here, that man for dey cell by now - and will still be forced by law, to take care of you and the baby!

I am a man and can never even verbally insult my wife, talkless of beating her. If i have a sister that any man touches, God help me, i fit kill that guy o. I dont care if they are married or not.

@Proudly9ja

must_a_far has helped me out, and i totally agree

Yes, Dora is doing her job but others are not doing theirs - since we agree that both jobs (Dora's as well as the 'others') go together, that means that Dora is still GOING TO FAIL in her duty of trying to rebrand.

dgreatrock:
the missionaries gave us education health et al. how much did we pay then?

True, very very true. When i think of all the Baptist, Catholic, Methodist Schools and Hospitals of old, i wonder how much they actually charged for their services? Are those schools not where a lot of our big men and women attended in those days (for almost no money), when money was not easy to come by (i even suspect many of those business church CEO's who are establishing expensive schools today where educated in some of these schools). i wonder how much people Obj and MKO (they claim they grew up in poverty) paid when they attended Baptist Boys school Abeokuta.

It beats me these days when i see all these new 'church' universities charging an arm and a leg for fees, accomodation etc. We are not saying that education should be made cheap, but please, it should not be solely for the rich only.

KunleOshob:
This what jesus as to say about calling a pastor "daddy"

Matthew 23:6-10:
6 And they love to sit at the head table at banquets and in the seats of honor in the synagogues. 7 They love to receive respectful greetings as they walk in the marketplaces, and to be called ‘Rabbi.’
8 “Don’t let anyone call you ‘Rabbi,’ for you have only one teacher, and all of you are equal as brothers and sisters. 9 And don’t address anyone here on earth as ‘Father,’[daddy] for only God in heaven is your spiritual Father. 10 And don’t let anyone call you ‘Teacher,’ for you have only one teacher, the Messiah.

Redeemed members and other pastor idolators please note.

Man, i love your posts, you are someone that reads his bible properly. I've read your posts on TITHING and on THE BAPTIST CONVENTION AS WELL, THUMBS UP TO YOU!

chiomy4u:
i am really disapointed in many of u who have posted rubish here, That is the reason why this country is going from bad to worst, because of the likes of those who thinks they know better and can do better than those in position, Before Dora came into the helms of affairs at the information ministry, have u ever heard of anything meaningful from that ministry?? The problems with most nigerian is that, they dont have the knowlegde of wat they are saying before they open their smelling bucal cavity to talk rubish,
Rebranding Nigeria is for our own good, for those of us who do international business will understand what i am saying, there is a saying that says, 'a good name is better than silver and gold",
We have bad image outside, that is wat our dear minister is trying 2 clean up, and that bad image was created by we Nigerians, the woman is cleanin up our mess and we are complaining, wat rubish,

Before Dora came into that ministry, someone else tried to Rebrand Nigeria and his efforts failed. A former minister of information, Chukwuemeka Chikelu tried to do this, during the early Obasanjo era - hence what Dora is doing is not new.

Sorry to digress from the original topic, but Nigeria cannot be rebranded until certain things take place - things like education, health, infrastructure, corruption etc have to be tackled and sorted out, before any 'meaningful' rebranding can take place.

Let me use a little story that we may all understand:

Imagine a situation where a manufacturer of drinks (take Coca cola for example) has been blacklisted because certain impurities have been found in their drinks. Imagine finding cockroach eggs in a few bottles of coke. Imagine everyone in Nigeria hears about this and Coca cola is hit by a wave of people refusing to drink Coke. They are losing market share and decide to do something about it. They decide to REBRAND their image and inform people that they are now a new and improved coca cola company. They tell Nigerians that you can now trust coke and start drinking it again. They promise everyone that they have cleaned up their acts. People believe them and start drinking coke again, AND MANY MORE PEOPLE FIND THE SAME COCKROACH EGGS INSIDE MORE BOTTLES OF COKE. WILL THAT REBRANDING WORK? NO IT WILL NOT.

It is the same situation Nigeria finds herself in. Dora is rebranding Nigeria without taking care of the internal maggots first!

I totally agree.

Even speaking to the young adults and teenagers in the UK will make one understand that yes, they have a very good educational system and all that, but they really dont know much about other parts of the world and the things that are happening elsewhere. i think it may be a case of 'their country can meet all their needs' so why must they look outside to see and understand what happens elsewhere?

samparian:
You've never crossed the shores of this country. No wonder you think Naija is all bleeped up.
Try living in other countries and you'll long for Naija with all her ills.
My business has taken me to 12 countries and i've lived abroad for close to 3 years now so i know what i'm saying. There are more corrupt nations than naija, believe me.

Dear Sir,

While I agree that living in other countries still makes one long for Naija, i would like to know what countries you are speaking of, when you mention that 'there are more corrupt nations that Nigeria'. Are these countries other African countries? The reason i am asking is that if you are comparing Nigeria to other African countries, yes, it is possible to conclude that there are more corrupt nations.

I have been to enough foreign countries to speak authoritatively on the 'ill luck' my green passport brings! Entering through any immigration post in Europe and even parts of Africa is always challenging as i am ready to answer silly questions and endure unusual delays. Why? because the whole world thinks that ALL Nigerians are guilty of every evil they can think of!

I must go to Silverbird alone. I must also remember to dress well. I hope someone comes to ask me for popcorn too!

RichyBlacK:
Too many illiterates in Nigeria!

Real illiterates. How can this Okogwu man talk like this? He is just making a fool of himself and his family. Of course he will be in IBB's side. No be all of them chop nigeria money?

Stupid man!

tpia:
what's this state of origin certificate?

I've never heard of it.

Epiphany:
I dont think it is a state of origin certificate, its is more like a Local Government Certificate. At least i understand this from my own state perspective, each LGA can give you a certificate stating that you are from a particular LGA. Of course with that, you are a bonafide member of whatever state that LGA is located in.

Sorry, i forgot to state that i speak from my DELTA STATE EXPERIENCE. i dont know if it is the same in other states

tpia:
what's this state of origin certificate?

I've never heard of it.

I dont think it is a state of origin certificate, its is more like a Local Government Certificate. At least i understand this from my own state perspective, each LGA can give you a certificate stating that you are from a particular LGA. Of course with that, you are a bonafide member of whatever state that LGA is located in.

Dora Akunyili cannot rule Nigeria. She will either die or be killed within the first few weeks of her presidency.

This country does not need a Dora or Soludo or even an Okonjo - Iweala - these people are too 'professional' in what they do and in their understanding of issues. Too professional in the sense that Soludo and Iweala will mostly only understand economic issues. I mean, look at what Akunyili is doing now. Rebranding Nigeria. How can you rebrand a country that is rotten? A country that is not doing well, a country that is consistently at the bottom of the worlds corruption table. What kind of rebranding is that? If she was smart, she should not have accepted that portfolio.

What this country needs is an IBB like person but WITH VERY GOOD INTENTIONS. Someone who can be wicked (towards the wicked) and at the same time, be very tactful, compassionate and diplomatic. Someone whose words and utterances can sting and at the same time soothe.

Or maybe a Fashola kind of person, someone who has a vision and a goal and is very systematic in his/her trying to achieving them

Among the older generation: Oba Otudeko, Subomi Balogun, Felix Ohiwerei, the Ibru brothers. These are the 'old school' guys who i would not mind being apprenticed to

Among the young guys: Tony Elumelu (with all the past rumours, changing regulations, his sharp practices and cowboy moves, he is still standing. Beats my imagination), Fola Adeola and Aig-Imoukhuede of Access Bank

Wow, nice pictures. Its a pity that we did not build upon what the colonial masters did. I believe very strongly that if we did not 'throw' them out in 1960, we may be better off (structurally) than we are now.

I cant understand why Cecilia Ibru is on the list, when it is her husband (and his brothers) who own majority of the businesses, including Oceanic, Aero Contractors, Federal Palace etc etc.
Why are they not the ones on the list?

Dat boy na real man o, i wish i was him.

9jaganja:
There's nothing new under the sun. It's been done over a thousand times already. This whole portray Africa as a good place is ridiculous what's good? SA xenophobia, Niger Delta (the budget fund supplier of Nigeria) is still in shambles, I'm not even going to talk about Ghana. All those portray Africa as a better place is just bull shit cause right now, only nature of Africa is good not the people's lives and environment. I hope it's not the government that is spending money on this cause it would be a shame that they are trying to cover their inabilities with the media.

My brother, before i forget, it is not the govt spending money on this cause. I know one of these girls. She worked on VI for close to 4 years in an office behind Silverbird cinemas. She saved up money all that time and is also relying on individual donors: Parents, friends, well wishers (people in her office also contributed some amounts and are still contributing to her trip).

In all honesty, does this look like something our backward government (forgive the use of that word) will ever fund? Dem never chop money finish, na to sponsor some small girls wey dey waste time instead of going to marry (as some others have amusingly stated in not so many words)

Abeg leave the girls jare

I totally support what these girls are doing. It is a breath of fresh air, something new from Nigerians for once. This is something the westerners do daily and that is one reason they are far ahead of we africans. They (westerners) love to see the world - and that is why they have conquered the world too. Westerners see nothing in travellling around the world with nothing other than the backpack on their backs. That is what inspires them to write books, direct movies, tell stories, etc. Ewan McGregor (actor) did something similar? He rode around africa on his motorbike and the documentary he directed earned him millions of dollars (which he donated to charity, of course). Of course, we all know the stories of Marco Polo, Ferdinand Magellan, Vasco da Gama etc. They were all adventurers that made a name for themselves and their names still live on.

Secondly, these girls have already been profiled on Africannews.com (http://www.africanews.com/site/Nigerian_sisters_are_celebrating_Africa/list_messages/22306), BBC (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7921641.stm) and some other international news agency websites. They are slowly carving out a name for themselves. Let us not be surprised when they get nice jobs with international agencies as ambassadors or representatives. This is the kind of thing these agencies look out for in people.

Let us all look a bit deeper in ourselves. There are some of us too, who may be born explorers and adventurers. Let us not let the challenges of our 'sad' country hold us down. Let us not let the fear of the unknown or the 'lack of funds' discourage us.

Although i am a Christian and have had a lot to say against many statements given by Adeboye and some other 'Men of God', i can only conclude that regardless of what name we call these esteemed men of God, THEY ARE STILL HUMAN BEINGS. Being human beings makes them prone to the same cares and worries that we ourselves go through, worries about our future, families, finances, etc. They are prone to talk off point sometimes (who can really control the tongue), prone to self preservation, prone to the pleasures of power and fame etc.

Although Adeboye's relationship with Baba was/is questionable, he (Adeboye) as a mature man and human being may have made a mistake (whether he choses to admit it or not). His close relationship with OBJ may have been HIS own doing and not that of God. There are instances in the bible where God specifically told his prophets and servants not to do something, which they went ahead to do. That did not take away the fact that these dissobedient prophets or kings, were not God's children or servants? They still turned around to repent and God still accepted them.

Lastly, there is a part of the bible that states that 'Only the Lord knows those who are his'. Whether Daddy GO is doing God's work or not is not left to us to continually debate on. It is left to God to do whatever he wills with the GO. That said however, it is sometimes interesting to read people's views on these Men of God.

Afterall, did Jesus not ask his disciples, "who do people say i am?"

TYPICAL. Look for a scapegoat to blame for your inefficiency - sack the man in charge and make it look like he is the problem. Yar'Adua is just trying to PRETEND and make us (Nigerians) feel that he is doing something.

Permit me to say something though. i have always had the feeling that if you bring in 5 top British (or any other western country's) Energy consultants, give them 5 years to turn the Power/Energy sector around and most of all, GIVE THEM SOME FORM OF AUTONOMY, we will in no time, have our power supply all laid out and properly planned. I just have the feeling that our own people are tied down with so much politicking and too many people to please and answer to. We have had so many eminent people in the positions of Minister of Power and steel, MD of NEPA/PHCN etc and yet, nothing has happened.

I am not berating our own indigenous engineers and consultants. I just feel that we need people that do not have any allegiance to anyone and anything and are only in a position to do a particular job and once it is finished, leave. People who are not afraid to step on toes and re-organize an industry. Maybe if we allow the imperialists to show us the way, we can learn once again.

To be honest, I AM VERY IMPRESSED WITH MOST PEOPLES KNOWLEDGE IN THIS AREA.
One question though, what are we doing with this? Its amazing that you find Nigerians with all this knowledge and we do not have good autoengineering manufacturing companies or firms around. Tells a lot about our business environment and policies. We should be harnessing all this knowledge.
Keep it up guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BRF seems to be doing well. I sincerely hope that who ever is coming into the government house after him will continue like this. The reason is that 8 years will not be enough to finish up what he wants to do.

Ride on Guv, we are solidly behind you.

@labiyemmy:
@Epiphany

The problem with the embassy is nothing out of the ordinary, how is dog poo a government problem or a ministry of external affairs problem, how are unpacked gabage cars the problem of the government, how are these government problems - you said you went to the other embassies and you noticed the difference, dont you know how well behaved and well mannered those citizens are? it is the problem of the people, the Nigerians themselves, so unruly, I was at the same place you went, come and see how unruly these Nigerians were, rushing for their passports, never obeying instructions, etc - but these same Nigerians will go to these other embassies and behave very well, extremely well - so, whose problem is it? the government or the ill behaved Nigerians.

O boy, i bow for you o. In fact, i am still laughing. I see your point sha! It is a pity, real pity. Our people are sooooo unruly!

@poster. i feel you, i really do.
I was at the Nigeria High Commission in London and felt the same way too. I was there for the first time in April last year and what i saw was an eye sore. On getting to the embassy, the entrance was un-manned. There was no one to give directions as to where you should go and where you should not go. Other than that, there was a big pile of faeces just a few feet away from the door. Obviously, with no one to man the door and no security man in sight, someones dog must have poo'd by the door and the owner just left it there. Secondly, there was a pile of refuse waiting for collection just by the door too. This pile of refuse was still in the refuse bags and i can swear that there were about 20 bags waiting to be collected.

Well i got into the visa section and lo and behold, it was underground - meaning that there was not good ventilation inside the room. The walls were dirty, seats were not arranged properly, there was chaos everywhere. Crap. I was ashamed and upset. I vowed not to go there again unless i absolutely have to.

The reason i really felt very bad is that earlier on, i had been to the American, German and Italian and Thai embassy. These embassies were lovely and welcoming

This topic, whether na leader or na follower dey cause the problem is like asking which comes first: The egg or the chicken.
However, i would like to point out that the leaders have a greater share to bear in the rot that has entered the society today. Why?

There was a time when Nigeria was doing, 'okay' and had the opportunity of becoming a greater nation. Those who were artisans, were good and honest artisans. Traders were honest with their wares and did not dilute or contaminate their goods. Lecturers paid attention to what they were doing in their classes and did not give out handouts in place of teaching. Goods were relatively affordable and even the lower class could afford food to eat. What happened? We had some people who call themselves 'leaders' take the mace of power and ruin the whole country. They decided to steal large sums of money and turn the country into their own private playground.

How did this affect the ordinary man?

The ordinary man (all of us) became hustlers. We began to cut corners and cheat to make ends meet. We started asking for tips to get our work done. The artisans started putting too much turpentine in paint so that instead of one litre of paint, they can have four. The traders started diliting and contaminating their goods so that they will have a double portion to sell and make more money. Road users started 'bribing' the police and others so that they will turn a blind eye to unroad worthy vehicles. Of course, the police started asking for money to enable scrap worthy vehicles pass them by.

The whole country became a mess because of a few people.

There is no way you can really say that you do not blame the leaders because it is MOSTLY their fault. I can guarantee that should an honest, God fearing, dependable, visionary, accountable person come into power and decide to heal the land, things will change. It has been done elsewhere in the world. Will we not agree now that the leader is an important factor?

Hey Hotstepper and Kim890, my dissertation was on a similar topic. If you are interested, i can send it to you guys. Let me have your emails and will do so when you are ready.

I came up with a questionnaire and got about 45 respondents. The dissertation did not only focus on the Oil industry though, but on other industries too.

The funny thing is that while we are all shouting out against the idea and putting good reasons forth why this silly United States of Africa should not happen, our leaders may just go ahead and do something else. I remember the years of the OIC (Organization of Islamic Conference or so). Was there not a story that Nigeria joined this group or something, against the wishes of Nigerians?
Secondly, there was an AU summit somewhere where Gaddafi started this silly talk of USAfrica and only one or two people spoke against it. I actually think Yar'Adua was one of them.