₦airaland Forum

Chillisauce: TOTO

SEXKILLZ

CHAIRCOVER

BUSHYANUS

BLUETOOTH

BABAOSISI

Adrenaline123: wow nice one. Congrats. I want you to name him/her Tochukwu or Oluwatobi or Itoro Obong

dayokanu: Just one question. How much do they charge for dowry in your area?

bukatyne: That Hannah's example is not even right.

If Elkannah loved her so much, why did he marry the second wife?

He could have TTCed with her to prove his love

Connoisseur: Why would a man spend hours looking at his day old baby but refuse to carry her in his arms

jidegirl12: If I have my way, I will have 6 children as long as I can afford them but that wasn't the 'plan'.

@Topic NO, I will neither marry nor go ahead with the union again.

I Love children and I live for them, they give me hope and strength to go on.

I remembered when we were ttcing our first and our living room was spotless and I was glued to playhouse Disney network every-time we watch TV , we didn't like it atall , I just can't imagine myself without my copies.

Heck singles ( anti marriage) even want kids. Why do you think Brad Pitt bailed out from his first marriage? ( that's kinda lame example eh?)

I pray for the fruit of the womb for all TTC women out there , even as the holy month of fasting begins, The Lord will have mercy upon y'all.

jidegirl12: If I have my way, I will have 6 children as long as I can afford them but that wasn't the 'plan'.

@Topic NO, I will neither marry nor go ahead with the union again.

I Love children and I live for them, they give me hope and strength to go on.

I remembered when we were ttcing our first and our living room was spotless and I was glued to playhouse Disney network every-time we watch TV , we didn't like it atall , I just can't imagine myself without my copies.

Heck singles ( anti marriage) even want kids. Why do you think Brad Pitt bailed out from his first marriage? ( that's kinda lame example eh?)

I pray for the fruit of the womb for all TTC women out there , even as the holy month of fasting begins, The Lord will have mercy upon y'all.

k2039: I will (only reason, I could have been in her shoes if I was also born a female, so it won't be fair to let her go), but artificial insemination will be my own option for procreation. I can only adopt after I have given birth to my own kids, not before.

dayokanu: If they were both fertile and the man beats the kids the wife says abeg no kill my kids. It wont have any meaning then

But if it was through sperm donor or whatever and the wife says the same thing "Dont kill MY kids" thats when you would know that words have another meaning

ayans4u: @ Alwaystrue....Thank you....the truth is I have forgiven.....trying to forget and move ahead....can't keep my life on a "stand still".....though some "lost opportunities" still pain me.....but above all....I don't make mistakes in life....I only learn....though the lessons inherent in this experience are hard; but above all, I thank God because all the lessons are worth the pains......
and may I also request that you all do this.....
whether you have just read through, are reading through, have contributed or not.....just do this for me, him....."us" if you would say.....
help us "knock" at the door of heaven....on this issue.......tell it to God, ask him to direct my feet on whatever decision I eventually take and most importantly.....for his perfect healing on "him" whether I "remain" with him or not.....and if possible, ask your church to also put "us" in your prayers......cos I .....strongly believe in the healing power of God......am sure God will do something about it and save "us" all the pain, trouble etc.....
thank you all....God bless us all in Jesus name.....AMEN!

alutacontinua: Yes, I CAN!
I don't easily fall in love but when i do, it's always unconditional.
I don't mind adopting.

kunletiwoo: I'll go ahead and marry her! As long as I love her, nothing wey God no fit do. "There's miracle in love"

mike404: I FIT KII ONE GEH FOR THIS NAIRALAND IF DEM GIMME GUN

Siena: You're a brave man. I was in such a situation some years back. I knew about my wife's infertility issues prior to getting married, because she told me. We talked about adoption and surrogacy before we got married, and agreed those were the routes we'd take. Sadly, after we'd said "I do", she changed her mind.

We began taking Adoption classes through Barnardos. It can take up to a year for applicants to become approved to adopt. Part of the process is having your background checked, including any ex-partners. We were aware of this, and knew it would be intrusive to a degree, but we were okay with it - at least I was.

7 months into the process, we had a session one afternoon. I left work early, got home and found my wife wasn't home. I called our case workers to enquire why they were 25 minutes late. I was told my wife had cancelled, and wasn't I aware? I said no, I wasn't, so when was the rescheduled session? I was told there wasn't one, that my wife hadn't cancelled just this session, she'd pulled out altogether.

My wife got home, and I queried her on her decision to pull out, without discussing things with me? Her response? "I find the process too intrusive, I don't like the way they question us." I was shocked. I tried to reason with her, that children have to be protected, and the checks the authorities make are pretty valid, and expected. But she was adamant, so that ended the adoption route to children.

So we had just one route left - surrogacy, which we had agreed upon before getting married. Again, I was the only one carrying out research, calling hospitals in the UK and Europe, getting ideas on cost etc. While my wife did nothing, and showed very little interest.

Each time I tried to pin her down so we could discuss things, there was always an excuse -

It's very expensive.
It's a long process.
It might not work.
The surrogate mother might pull out.
Yada yada yada.

We had two houses at the time - one in France, and the one we lived in in the UK. I said if money was the issue, we could always remortgage the UK house, children are priceless, and if it meant even selling the house outright, that's what we should be doing!

This dragged on for 4 years - I would suggest we talked, she would say she had a lot on at work, we'd discuss things later. Things came to a head one day, she returned from work, and I told her outright we were going to thrash things out here and now, no more procrastinating. It was only then she told me bluntly she didn't want surrogacy either, she didn't want me to have a child with another woman's eggs womb, that the child would be mine, but not hers. So basically, she'd deceived me in the cruellest way possible, and was prepared to condemn me to a life of childlessness, through her own selfish desires?!

I took it hard. At first, I tried to put children out of my mind, and simply make the marriage work, but it was impossible. With each passing day, I resented my wife more. I began a series of blatant affairs, and didn't give a rat's árse if my wife found out or not, part of me did want her to catch me out, and she did, on several occasions, with different women. But I couldn't care less. And for those who may wish to attack me with scriptures, go shake your tambourine elsewhere, because I'm not interested. Until your thrust into a certain situation, you can't tell for sure how you'd react, at least not with any degree of accuracy.

For those who can cope with childlessness or deception, good luck, I sincerely wish you all the best.

Enangson: INEC will generate a criterea and I bet the APC Secretariat wont meet INEC standard and wont be approved.