₦airaland Forum

Jazzlite:
who call you okonkwor

LastMumu:
This _shit is not even remotely funny.

tohpahz:
So this morning i woke up to a txt on my phone.

Talking bla bla bla aby bvn whatever.
I normally ignore oo. Buh this time i decided to dig up the person behind it.

Don't be angry at d guy's bad English.. Naija's educational system is amazing

dahaz:
You have not changed since childhood

keepingmum:
i hope in the unfortunate event that his business is unsuccessful and/or doesnt do well - he will be able to count on those "friends" to pay his children fees, his house rent, build his personal house, feed his family, perform his responsibilities and that of his wife to their extended family members, change his and his wife's cars. Give his wife her monthly home allowance and monthly personal allowance.

Pay for their visits to the village, holiday trips with the family, recharge cards etc

If they decide to have more children, I hope the friends will foot the maternity bills and everything else.

Finally, as these "wonderful friends/advisers" of his are still around, i am sure the man should have no qualms sharing his wife's kitty with them seeing as they are her husband, by proxy. They make decisions regarding her home and the buffoon, sorry husband she married, is infact just the messenger

harsysky:
Your "I don't mind" should include childhood o. Don't leave that one aside.

dahaz:

Enypie:
I wouldn't want my kids doing that. It was cool though.

byvan03:
If people come to terms with this fact and realise that you don't have to stick out any bullshi*t, life will be easier for everyone. I have realised that there really is no correlation between age of marriage and quality of marriage too. Same challenges a young bride faced is what an older bride will face. I have no problem with someone that chose not to marry at all but for those that want, it's better to choose when you still have a larger pool to pick from. That way you settle for the desirable and not the available.

byvan03:
U



I totally agree, older women get married but there is a difference between marrying the man you want and the man that is available at the time. I know a lady about to get married, she is over 50 but the quality of the man is troubling from all ramifications . If she was younger, no family member will accept that man but now they just want her to get the hell away from house. The bad news is that the man is even stalling the whole progress, while she waits hopefully.


I totally agree with the rest of the post.

bukatyne:
@Women having mates past 30...

From my little observation, getting a man to marry is not the issue as much as indecisiveness and deciding to hold on to several 'unpotential' men due to reasons best known to them.

I marvel when a lady tells me she is 'single and searching' yet has several male 'friends' she keeps around her

How would the potential husband be able to decipher she is still available?

I again marvel when some give very funny characteristics such as he must have so in his account; must look like this etc. Etc.

I know someone who when in her late 40s got a divorcee to marry her and she wanted a big white wedding in addition to the heavy traditional wedding. The man obviously didn't want a big white but was willing to have vestry wedding. Years later, she got a widower to marry her and she said she couldn't deal with step kids. Several examples abound.

Some might say what about men but a older man who is not so rich will rush to his village to marry Nkechi or Titi; he wouldn't waste time courting/trying to court Tiwa Savage who he can't attain and Behind his Nkechi to Tiwa.

I told someone I married my boyfriend from university and she said I must be boring... Well, I agree.

I have seen older women marry but they all decided at that point they needed a break and wanted to get married and positioned themselves for marriage.

@Women feeling sex.y past 30..

I think women are more in-tuned with their sexuality as they grow older. I see women in their mid/late 30s in my office and I say have managed to look very good despite their kids and have the money, time and knowledge to look fresh than ladies in their 20s.

@ Marriage being the ultimate...
It is just a means to an end. It is important to have someone who is compelled to have your back, put you first and create mini yous with while you launch out into the world. The mini yous replace you when you exit.

I don't understand it as the hands wriggling institution where everything stands still or end the day you say 'I do'

It is even important to have your own pursuits and friends to enjoy your marriage. No man/woman can give you everything and there are some voids only God/vocation can feel.

It is also expected that people have their eyes open when entering so they don't jump out and they have spouses also committed to making/sustaining their happiness.

Cc:

Byvan, Mindfulness, crackhaus, HannefahRN.
[size=2pt]
Lilmax is becoming a prophet o![/size]

Mindfulness:
You have gotten all the answers needed and more.

By the way, it doesn't matter what age anyone marries.
Just last year, a relative was left by her husband after 25 years of marriage. She was 17 when she met him and 19 when they got married.

There is no guarantee in life!

Any man or woman who thinks that marriage will save them from misery or loneliness, is gullible and out of touch with reality.

Bolade005:
But you can make career sacrifices for your marriage to work? No?