₦airaland Forum

lilioj:
I'm a mother and I do spank my kids when necessary but.... I couldn't watch that video for long, the way the kid was crying uncontrollably made me feel like crying. Call me emotional, putting out a video like that was all shades of cringyyyy. Well what do I know my fellow Nigerians say he has has blown all thanks to the video!!

Usorohtheman:
That video protray some of the reasons, why Nigerians can't protest and fight for their rights. Most Nigerians were intimidated by their parents during the growing up stage and so, fear has sticked to their minds.

NerdyRudeGyal:
*Grabs plate and runs away*.

Akposy:
Happy new month! Wishing y'all the best

First meal of the month.. Inspired by cococandy Rice and stew

Mandela27:
Marriage does not cure lonliness anything.
Some bad marriages sef can make a once happy person feel lonely fa.
And it now happened that u've cut of from ur friends that used to keep u company so that u can focus on ur marriage.Lols,You will just be walking on the road and talking to ursef.
Please stay away from marriage.Stay away from anything u cannot walk away from without feeling used and cheated.

You can get kids without marrying anybody btw.

Acidosis:
Why are you trying so hard to "shrink" the definition of companionship?

Companionship serves many purposes, and loneliness is just one of those purposes. If companionship does not solve your loneliness, it is surely addressing other needs, e.g. someone to watch your back or save your a$$ when you're sick and unable to lift a finger, when you're downtrodden, incapacitated, etc.

If companionship is all that is required to solve loneliness, married people won't have the need for basic immaterial things like television, social media, phone, etc.


Why buy television when "companionship" can simply lift your spirit all day long?


People sef

UjuJoan2:
I don't know how you see this spanking of a thing. It's not like whenever they do something wrong we go all out to beat them up. IT doesn't really work that way. Most times I only resort to flogging after ALL other methods have failed. . . . And only for very grievous offenses that were repeated over and over again.

I know it's easy to assume any child being flogged is being abused, but it's not necessarily true. A lot of children need that flogging for their brains to reset. What is important is to know what works for each child, and try not to go beyond any boundaries.

I also had parents who knew how to use the cane, and I used to think they went too far. But now, raising kids of my own, I see now that you just have to do that for some kids, sometimes. And funny enough, somehow, I didn't get as much beating as my siblings. I knew what was expected of me, and I just did it. If I made a mistake, I showed true remorse and somehow I never got flogged as much. My siblings used to think I was favored, but the truth is, I was so eager to make my parents happy and proud that I never even considered doing anything that would upset them.

People are made differently, just because some children turned out well without being flogged doesn't mean others won't need the cane to be responsible.

pcguru1:
I feel the same way, I'm a quiet person and likes personal space, but my babe doesn't believe in that. Most times I just bottle my discomfort and learn to enjoy extroversy

Jullima:
Yes, he sounds normal to people that raise or are around children his age. They’ve seen it enough times not to judge another mother until they have a full context. They recognize that tears when they wake him up to bath, to eat his food, wear his clothes, you know when you tell him to do things he doesn’t want to do.

Where did you get your child psychology diploma from? You’re owed a refund.

Jullima:
I absolutely don’t care if you agree with me, not my objective.

Maybe because you are too passionate, you’re getting tunnel vision and you’ve become blind and can’t tell when a child is being abused. You begin to hear and see what you want to see to fit into your passionate agenda. It happens, you become too passionate in something you start to lose objectivity and rationality goes out the window.

Ladyhippolyta88:
It is really a sad situation no wonder some of the children grow up to become frustrated sadist because there is a communication gap and the only language they understand when it comes to correcting their children is beating

Jullima:
Apparently not! If you think any child crying means he/she is ‘terrified’ or being ‘brutalized’. Why do you think the video went viral? Because he behaved atypical of a Nigerian child that chops beating.

Jullima:
Okayy

There’s still NOTHING in the video that suggests the boy is an abused child. Personally, I also don’t believe in spanking, I am more of a ‘see the errors of your ways, actions have consequences’ kind of mother. So your posts are right in the right context but not this one. There’s absolutely nothing that proves he’s been abused, even the Western country you quoted, spanking is LEGAL as long as it doesn’t cause injury to the child. There’s spanking and there’s spanking. So do you know the kind of spanking this boy was going to receive?? I hate it when people judge others without context.

“He’s terrified” lol really?? Have you been around children?? You’ve not seen children act like they’ve been shot just because you tell them to eat their food?

That’s why I don’t post family on social media, so many judgy people on the internet.

Klass99:
@ Hathor5,

Your choice of words over this matter is truly baffling, very out of place and out of proportion too.

You've gone from abuse to violence to brutalizing. Haba! what will you now call real abuse, violence and brutality when you see it?

Did you see the thread where a deaconess physically burnt and scarred the flesh of a young girl in her care? Or the one where another foolish woman badly injured her maid and she ended up being arrested along with her husband? That's abuse, violence and brutality. What Boko Haram does is all of that and more too.

Jeez Hathor just give it a break already! You say let's agree to disagree but then you come back with more vitriol (bitter criticism) over this and Nigerians as a whole.

Like I said before I wasn't impressed by that video BUT I didn't see anything wrong with it either and what you're calling abuse, violence etc is nothing but discipline to me.

MrBrownJay1:
well spotted and fixed...

carpdiemz:
A lot has been going through my mind lately and I think it’s would be nice to share my take on this subject; with my social observations I noticed recently that there are a lot of single women all of over the states in Nigeria and lots of single mothers too.

Let start with single ladies :

have been on different social media and met a lot of girls on there and I can say it boldly that 90 percent of them are loookg for a guy to settle down with , with my observations about Nigeria men , some actually want to settle down ,but the economy situation can be very frustrating making the men to look like a player to some girls and this same issue has leads to so many baby mamas all around the states in Nigeria and it’s becoming a phenomenon just like the western countries, and I still think 40 percent of all this lies in the effect of bad economy , you can easily advised a man to settle down with little money but my dear yuh not the one that will be there when the struggle starts with more hardship and especially if the woman you get married to does not consider the economy situation and keeps giving birth to more children or don’t want to support .

Feel free to give your own view about this subject thanks

MrBrownJay1:
- you dont need to marry someone to get companionship
- many men [b]and women out there are NOT married but aint lonely either.
- loneliness/companionship has nothing to do with your marital status.
- a person dating can get the exact same rewards as a married person
- some married people are lonely[/b]

cococandy:
One waffle for a little girl

UjuJoan2:
Exactly.

I don't know why we like copying the westerners in everything. Look how their kids turn out. Teenage pregnancy is now a norm. Drug addicts and gangsters everywhere. Is that the ideal way of raising kids? Not 'abusing' them?

I'll "abuse" my kids anyday as far as they grow up to know right from wrong.

Jullima:
NO you can’t! And that’s mighty bold and presumptuous of you to judge the parenting skills of a mother you don’t know because of a few minute video you watched. Mothers make videos of their children all the time and send to family. From what someone said upthread, she didn’t post it herself.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Exactly.The boy was terrified to me.

And I did not find that video funny