₦airaland Forum

Name one thing men can do that women can't equally do?

They believe in the west that women are smarter than men( even though women act dumb mostimes in the affairs of the heart) and they also believe in Africa that men are smarter than women. Is there any real difference in performance on both sexes?

By Oyb
i wonder why these crusaders keep entertaining the delusion that they are wildly attractive and that , like them peopl have nothing better to do than obsess,

I also  wonder why it's difficult for some people to feel good about themselves and also leave those of us that are happy to express our joy and God's marvelous work in us. Is it a crime to say I am beautiful? If glorifying God for making me look and feel good is delusional in your line of thought, then, I can cormfortably say, Nigeria,  we have a problem.

by Brawss
No disrespect but they opted to be house wives didn't they? Otherwise they'd have found means to earn some an income no matter how meagre.

Some of them became housewives on their husbands orders. I've met lots of women that really want to work and earn a living but their husbands insisted they should stay home only to come back with a second wife one year later and relegate the older wife to poverty with her kids. Some are kicked out from their homes and are still homeless after years of building a big business empire with their husbands.


I remember years ago when Lagos eminent divorce lawyer, Morenike Ransome Kuti wrote articles to educate women on how to protect themselves from being mistreated like this but our male dominated society shoved her under the carpet.

see wetin liberation and civilisation don cause. all these lifestyle we copy from the west no go help us at all.

Are you suggesting that we hold  on to laws made by our ancestors that never saw light? Why accept cell phones, cars, electricity but find it difficult to accept a process that will make life easier for our women? Lots of housewives have been used and tossed to the gutter in Nigeria because they work at home. Even the westerners change their laws from time to time to adjust to the changing times. Now, ask yourself why women should not be able to kick their husbands out of their home @ night if he indulges in adultery like men do to women that commit the same crime since they both own the house?

lo @babycool, no feminism abeg. Just that the efforts of women in that country are underated by most men.

Housewives in Nigeria are yet to be remunerated by some husbands because they don't feel their work at home is[b] that[/b] valuable because it has no monetary reward. What is the best way to protect a housewife financially in case her husband decide to divorce her or take a second wife? Will you like Nigeria to make such laws that will either make housewives contribution at home equal to her husbands outside work that pays the bills?

Men: What about house husbands? will you sit tight at home and take care of the kids as a househusband especially if your wife is making more than you and both of you cannot afford a maid?

By oyb
er. . . i seem to remeber you were the one who referred to your fellow women as 'commodities'. perhaps you should go back to the era of the  slave trade where you belong.!

Where did I refer to women as commodities? or did I say that men like you take women as commodities as you've been doing here all these while?

the sooner your likes (quasi hypocritical feminists) get your acts in order and stop looking for the easy life, the sooner polygamy may become a thing of the past.

i hope you aren't into serial mongamy. (with a name like hotfunmi, you sound more like a nightclub crawler than a social crusader)

You are now throwing tantrums. Are you that frustrated on your bid to pass polygamy to the faint hearted? What has my log in name got to do with my opinion? FYI: i am funmilayo that is as hot as ever, hotter than any woman in your HAREM and you can't have it, so get lost. It's like you prey women that crawl the night clubs? no wonder you've been hitting on Italian Nigerians, university undergrads etc. Sugar daddying is out of fashion abeg.

as to being polygamy being' ungodly and unethical' are you implying  that Abraham and Solomon( the wisest of men) had those characteristics.!

You are jumping into christianity from the window. There is something called the new covenant and old covenant.

for your information,  i am in a monogamous marriage. i dated (solely) my wife for 5 years( a long distance relationship lagos- kogi, lagos -  abuja lagos  - kano)  before we got married.i work in a private company, not in government . your quick pigeon holing of me comments reflect the level of intellect you attach to your thinking, and explains the inane comments you've been posting.)

Why not try polygamy? why are you still with one woman? is it money? we can start a polygamy foundation for you like kanu  nwanko heart foundation that do raise money for heart patients.

go back to the slum where you reside with your maiguard and okada rider neighbours.( and keep spying on them and reporting back here) .!

At least they have a job and work hard everyday to earn a living. i love them and hold them to high esteem than the so called govt officials that steal theirs. Next?

as to loving and respecting women, you must first learn to respect yourselves. i will reiterarte a bitter truth - the second wives start out as girlfriends. why are so many of you so into ' big girl /oppressing ' that you prefer to stick with sugar daddies?.!

Isn't women a compound word? children should be the utmost factor here because they are victims of the mayhem brought by polygamy.

you women are the one's who often choose to be stupid. you know a guy is randy and can't keep it in his pants, but because of 'love', or desperation or whatever , you marry him anyway. the moment he hits the $ he marries a new wife, or trades you in for a nubile, upscale model( my favorite quote is from will smith -success doesn't change people, it only amplifies what is already there. polygamists and serial monogamists have always been like that, and on some level, the women in their lives have always known, but have chosen to ignore it. ?.!

Since you want to try that angle, I hope you know that men over the years have lost their lives or their dignity  because of their quest to see beyond  the "stupid" womans undies? Samson in the bible,  Bill Clinton, Abacha, Abiola and most  recently Obasanjo whom shamefacedly slept with his own sons wife etc. Who is more stupid now?

and for your information, you tribalist in crusader's clothing - i reside in lagos!

Whatever rocks your boat.

maybe if you read the news more instead of gossiping about your okada rider neighbours( where do you live?)!

Where I live? so you can stalk me? I guess you sleep everynight dreaming on how to get me in your bed. Dream on,mallam.


[quote][/quote]

ok, murder and rape is common in all societies - chinese, indian, african, european and all. . .so we should therefore accept it?

you'll have to come up with something better than that my friend!

Some animals such as penguins even practice monogamy, one mate for life, and you're coming here to say that it is right?

So God 'made' man promiscuous now huh?

In case you don't know (thank goodness my seniors like millie mama are here  ) women can be just as promiscuous as men, if not more. It is simply the shackles of a male dominated society that has led them to be restricted as such, with practices such as cutting off the clitoris used to reduce sexual urge.

We might as well cut off parts of men's jimmys if that will make them monogamous 

7 generations from Adam no polygamy

Adam was not 'polygamous' in the real sense, Hagar was his maidservant, not his 'wife'

Jacob's polygamy was his uncle's trickery - giving him Leah first, then Rachel

Solo boy was abnormal to say the least.

God tolerating our sins and not striking us dead the minute we do wrong does not mean he accepts it, He is patient and slow to anger.

5 star response by debosky.

Since when did polygamy stop a man from being promiscuous?

stop all this foolish conclusions.

Please my dear women don't let the devil decieve you by saying
guys are polygamous by nature.
God created one man for one wife
Eve for Adam
He didnt take other parts out of Adam to form Evette, Yvette, Shevette for Adam

Please don't be deceived

Notin Wonderful about Polygamy

Ask them my sister. Thank you for the hilarious insight.

hmmm. . .

one wonders why God didn't strike down abraham and solomon

one also wonders why God made man promiscuous.

(polygamy exists or has existed in some form in virtually every society, muslim , christian, chinese, hindu, etc )


the devil has nothing to do with it.or was it the devil they worshipped in the old testamant? nigerians should stop the ridiculous practice of blaming the devil for their failings.[font=Lucida Sans Unicode][/font]

So you agree now that polygamy is a virus and a social vice eating Nigeria up? irrespective of who practices it, it's not only ungody but unethical. There is no prejudice against Islam here, they were mentioned because they champion the crusade because its a part of their religion or should that be denied? You can paint it either way on christians but God vehemently said in the bible that not all those that call me father are for me. This implies that christians who supoort and practice polygamy may be calling God father but God isnot happy with them. The truth may be bitter to swallow but it must be said. The sooner your likes and other Nigerian polygamists learn to love and respect women in Nigeria, the better our pathway towards achieving glory in that country. Hold on to your multiple marriages under one roof and let me see how you'll break the poverty barrier unless you are planning to loot more funds from your state. I hope it'll not be a western state. Go back to north where you belong.

By Oyb
@ hot funmi,
are you sure you live in nigeria? or are you ust naive? was stella obasanjo low profile? or marwa's wife? or abiola's wives? 


women with low self esteem are those who choose to become second wive? hahahahaha

lwomen who choose to become second wives have a lot in common with a lot of women  on nairaland - who keep talking about how a man must b paid( actually, they call it hardworking) before they can marry him. they don't want any stress, they simply want an easy life.

Is that all you can remember? polygamous wives of rich government looters? I hope you know that low profile or low self esteem does not only apply to the poor but it attacks the rich also. Because stella Obasanjo was sorrounded by wealth and power does not make her secure with a high self esteem especially for somebody that died trying to look like a 20 yr old.

If you remember two years ago, Obasanjo tried to replace Stella with oyenka onwenu but she turned his ugly behind down because she has respect for herself anda very  high self esteem. Doesn't that surprise you that a single mother that had such an opportunity but turned it down when some of the so called rich women will jump at it? 

First of all, there is no indication that those polygamous women were high profile when they were married and even if they were, they still fall into the category of the high and mighty that loves to meddle with mud. Because Abiola married a PHD holder{that she got after marrying him} and marwa married a notice me lady does not mean those women are high profile.

Again, no woman that knows her salt will agree to polygamy. 90% of the second and third wives already had a comma in their lives and instead of taking the hard way to achieve success, they decided to take the easy way out  which is marrying a man to take care of thier problems. So, lets not be deluded about this.

by oyb
so er. . .  solomon and abraham, what are they?er - muslims   and those -   Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, the Latter-day Church of Christ and the Apostolic United Brethren? are they reading a different bible?

Of course none of the people or group you mentioned above are christians. Have you forgotten that christians are followers of christ? Did Abraham or solomon follow christ and His teachings? The latter day saints(mormons)too have their own holy book known as the mormon bible and will answer to anything but christian , do more research abeg before coming here with your wikipedia argument.

@poster

re - write the bible then.

Why? marriage is not a must in the bible. It's an option given to children of God to help alleviate the passion that may lead to fornication but not a must for every adult if you can control yourself.

by Ayinba
To the males who vehemently oppose Polygamy and give examples of thie okada driver with two wives, I sense jealousy.
For the females, hmmnnn, I wonder if they are married (first wives with 2nd wife), their husbands are planning to marry a 2nd wife, or they are actually attracted to it. Some women will actually prefer to have their husbands cheat on them than to have a 2nd wife.
Some of the guys here are only listing sexual advantages, there is alot more to polygamy than having extra women to sleep with. This is the mindset that makes polygamy bad. SO it is the men really, not the practice

You nee serious help. In Nigeria, most 2nd and 3rd place women are not only low profile but very easy to acquire so I dont see the reason why men should jealous what they can easily get. Polygamous men prey on mostly low self esteemed women because its ludicruos that a woman that knows her salt in this time and age will subscribe to polygamy. On the isssue of women prefering a cheating husband to a polygamous man, well, its like asking for a pick between HIV and Lung Cancer. Not all men cheat on their wives.

I had that question in my too,she told us her mom was the third wife.
Most likely the most beloved.
I wish we could hear from first wives and their kids

Doesn't that surprise you that in this age and time, some people are still clamouring for polygamy claiming that it reduces the number of single women looking for a husband.

Up till now, no on can put a finger on the advantages of polygamy but it's disadvantages abounds. Imagine what first wives go through in Nigeria after toiling so hard to help build their husbands and he comes home one weekend with a younger woman in the name of polygamy and before you know it, she and her kids will be left with nothing. If Bebe's mum went through that, she won't be clapping for polygamy by now.

no matter what aspect of life u look at it polygamy has got no really good advantage that makes it worth practicing!
i come from one loving big polygamous home and i know what i,m talking about,
all might look well and okay to an outsider but inside all is not well because no mortal
man can love two women equally no matter how much u try to cover it.

God bless you samira

by ojoabidemi

to hotfunmi
i may not give u an advantage of polygamy but polygamy itself isn.t the real cause of our woes.
education and most importantly proper implementation of the solutions to our problems is,.(examples abound in our socio-politico-economic life)
so don't hammer on polygamy as if its the culprit.
by the way which statistics agency informed you that poverty reduces by 20% witrh the eradication of polygamy,
please consider saudi arabia and other pure arab states as examples.at least they are over 90%polygamous.)
eastern europeans are monogamous yet they are not the richest countries in the world,romania is en example)

SUBMISSION:lets educate all and implement policies rightly and see our life change for the better.

My claim that poverty will be eradicated by at least 20% came from  what I see around me. Everybody keep talking about education as the only way out of abject poverty. How true is this? afterall, India has lots of educated people that still wallow in their poverty. Assuming education is the only way out, ask yourself and be honest, how many polygamous homes in Nigeria can afford training all their kids to tertiary level?  If there are not many of them, then my claim may be true afterall that polygamy and poverty are correlated and nutured  by Islam.

By olabowale
You title your Thread very wrong. You need to remove Islam from it. From your initial entry, you doubt if it is Islamic compartable. then from what i quoted from you in this response, you confirmed it that you know this is a Christian thing; initially the catholics and now adding, the protestants.

Let me tell you, I knew few Ogonis in my youth, Awolowo, Ajasin, etc. None of them was Muslim. And no one with Muslim name, even if he/she is pretending to be observing the 5 pillars of Islam, upon additing anything in worship, expressed or implied, of Allah the Almighty, is out of the fold of Islam. That a one, is Muslim in name only. You can not be Babalawo or oracle person (if thats what they are called) and say for sure that you are a Muslim. Inlam does not even permits what the african people, wearing as armlet or whatever, verses of Qur'an, or writing it and then washing it off from the tablet and collecting the water to drink.

Since Muhammad did not do it, ad did not permit it for anyone, then there is no basis for it. From your Oro thing, I begin to lean on the believe that you are from Owo. But hey, if am wrong, then forgive me.

I never accused muslims for ogboni cult, I rather said they are ostracized from the cult as well as roman catholics.

bY hAFEES
I AM FROM A POLYGAMOUS FAMILY. i am happy about it, i am prou of my father. if there is something i will request for in another world i will ask for the same family setting. for hotfunmi and the rest of them stop your blackmail and pretence, a man can not stay with only one woman for a long time ,a man is polygamous by nature, every animal is. Why break your wife's heart after your death when she discovers she's not the only mother of your children, why not bring the other woman home and marry her properly.

Let me tell you that it is not easy for a man with 4 wives to cheat continually or he must need to take performance enhancer, unlike a man with a wife who he is tired of marking her register and whose roamy instruments would still be angry.

Hotfunmi is a woman i understand they don't like other women to come into their homes, thats why she is screaming and employing all sort of blackmail mechanism. i am from a polygamous family, we all happy, very close,we are muslims, and very educated, at least if Phds and masters are considered good education, and my father is not extremely rich. I support it for those who wants to do it without apology to no bagger!

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO WITH 9 OUT OF TEN WOMEN WHO DONT GET MARRIED FOR LACK OF MEN, WOULD YOU RATHER THEY BECOME YOUR HUSBAND'S SECRET LOVERS OR WIVES.

i JUST DO NOT KNOW THE APPROPRIATE ANSWER FOR YOU. gONE ARE THE DAYS WHEN MEN CHEAT WITH AN EXCUSE. yOU CAN CONTROL IT AND THAT IS WHY YOU ARE NOT AN ANIMAL UNLESS YOU RATHER BE CALLED DOGS. Why should 9/10 women stay unmarried? we will have men almost going into extinction for that to happen.

by truecomments
MISS OR MRS HOTFUNMI,, YOU POSTED A VERY IMPORTANT TOPIC WHICH I HAVE NO FURTHER DOUBT AFTER READING THIS RESPONSE FROM YOU AS A VEILED ATTACK ON AN OTHERWISE CONTEMPORARY ISLAMIC JURISPUNDENCE.FOR YOUR INFORMATION,THERE ARE CERTAIN CONDITIONS THAT NECESSITATES A MUSLIM MAN TAKING MORE THAN ONE WIFE,IF THESE CONDITIONS EXIST AND ARE MET,THEN ITS GOOD FOR THE MAN AND HIS FAMILY VICE VERSA.

Conditions like what?

BUT I MUST INFORM YOUR OTHERWISE MYOPIC VIEW THAT NO ONE WOULD PROBABLY GO TO ''HELL FIRE'' FOR TAKING MORE THAN ONE WIFE.WHAT IF SOMEONE TAKES ANOTHER WIFE IN OTHER TO STOP HIMSELF FROM ENGAGING IN ADULTERY??

According to the holy bible, you are already guilty of adultery by indulging in polygamy. You cannot live on sex alone.

THINK!AND WISE UP MISS!!YOU HAVE PROBABLY ''SUCESSFULLY'' DIVIDED THE WORLD INTO TWO IN YOUR VIRTUAL MIND INTO GOOD AND EVIL, GOOD PROBABLY REPRESENTING  'CHRISTIANITY' AND EVIL CERTAINLY 'ISLAM' IN YOUR MIND. AND JUST FOR THE RECORD I USED TO LIVE IN THE SAME BUILDING WITH A DEACON WHO HAS THREE WIVES ALL UNDER THE SAME ROOF

Lol, we are just mere fans of either islam or chritianity by choice. For the records though, the quran advocates polygamy but the bible prohibits it so whomever is the hypocritical deacon you lived with should read his bible more often than playboy magazine or ikebe super.


.

AND FOR YOUR INFORMATION I AM NOT A PACIFIST,I AM LIBERAL MINDED BUT WHEN PEOPLE LIKE YOUR SELF SPEAK VOLUMES OF UNTRUE STATEMENTS, (LINKING ISLAM,POVERTY,ILLITERACY AND POLYGAMY  TOGETHER) I HAVE NO CHOICE THAN TO ASSUME THAT YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN WITH NOTHING ELSE TO FLAUNT.

We cannot all be liberals. I am not linking Islam with anything, all I did was point to the facts on polygamy.  You and I can at least agree that it's more prevalent among moslems thats why the northerners lead in that sector in Nigeria  followed by the moslem  yorubas.
That does not mean that there are no polygamists among the christian yorubas or other southeasterners, but the rate is small and is going down daily.
thanks for noticing my beauty.

.ILLITERACY IS NOT DEFINED ONLY BY ONES INABILITY TO SEEK WESTERN STYLED EDUCATION!!DAMN

[quote][/quote]Illiteracy means 'not literate' and is strictly related to the ability/inability  to read and write  unless you are talking about ignorance.

by Purestboy
Polygamy is not good. Too common among uneducated moslems. Imagine an Okada man named Sule having 2 wives. They are my neighbour and I know what the wives go through before they feed their children.

I think the okada man has control. Most of these maiguards have 5-6 wives and manufacture children in dozens and these children not only receive no education, they are also supplied as almajiris to the streets to beg for their survival. How do you curtail poverty in a society that chants for a thing like this?

Funmi, with all due respect, please withdraw your post and try modifying it! It makes absolutely no sense!
What do you mean " Abiola had thirty something children born for him by various men"
And this,
"It also affords the man to legally savour the spice of early death and troublesome life"
FYI!
Having a troublesome life is not exclusive to polygamy! You could be married to one woman and still
have a troublesome & very unhappy life!
GET IT RIGHT PLEASE!
Monogamy does not guarantee marital bliss! Don't be disillusioned!

1. Polygamy is usually the precursor to early death because 9 out of 10 polygamous homes are always in tumoil and disarray.

2. A man that has no peace in his life is knocking on deaths door because You and I know that men cannot survive stress like women. So, polygamy is a recipe for early death.

3. Although monogamy does not guarantee happiness, but you have a high chance of achieving happiness and tranquility to polygamy besides the children are happier because they usually have more for themselves.{one advantage of polygamy}

4. Didn't you read from the newstands that about 33 or more of Abiolas children tested negative to his DNA? where do you live? la la land? Do you think he fathered all those kids? Stop living in la la land and move to Agege abeg.

@ Topic (strictly),

I would say an advantage of polygamy is that it affords the man to legally savour the spice of life which is variety! simple!!

Is this really an advantage? It also affords the man to legally savour the spice of early death and troublesome life. Lets not talk about the sries of children that were born by who knows their father. Abiola had thirty something children born for him by various men and he still believed he had his women under control till death. I wish you men can do DNA test on your children to ascertain those that are really yours. If you think Nigerian women are dumb, think again.

Men that hate to take pictures are usually players because they don't want women they play to see his photo and recognise that they are being played. Why are Nigerian men so randy?

@pilgrim,
I am interested because i want to know the rationale for ostracizing them from their cult. Is ogboni a protestant christian cult?