₦airaland Forum

JeffreyJamez:
If you see KT bank account, your balls go disappear ..behave!

oga, abeg na dat kind pesin i dey find to do gateman for, Abeg u fit hook me up with am?

Aunty i know say na cunny way to take advertise yourself be dis,

I no get money sha, i for don toast you,

But why your teeth come dey brown nah,
Na camera cause am, abi na because dem no dey sell toothpaste for una area?

Decibel:
That's what Buhari has caused. Inflicting hardship on his subjects. Smh

oga leave dat play oh,
Give honour to whom honour is due,
that's what hunger has caused not Buhari,


Am talking from experience oh,
I almost took that route one day were hunger almost kill me,
But on the road to the place where i wanted to commit the suicide,

I picked a wallet containing 2k,
Na so i take reverse come enter the nearest Mama Put chop with 500naira pocket 1500naira,
I still dey thank that guy were troway that wallet till now,
If not for him, my gone too soon posters for dey road now

One thing this thugs and thieves wrongly labelled Militants, haven't realised yet,
Is that, this is not a government ran by Two lecturers( Late President Yar'adua and Goodluck Jonathan)
who are afraid of spilling blood,
Buhari is not only an ex General in the army but from a warring tribe(fulani),
The so called militants will bomb oil installations,
And maybe kidnap a few white men,
In the ensuing war,
President Buhari will not relent or call for ceasefire, amnesty etc, until the are all dead,
I only pity the innocents who will be caught in the crossfire.

peterbello:
I hear you. Thank you. Make I give you work make you burst bottle for my head too, I think?

No sir,
Oga no be me been burst am the bottle sef na one of my co- workers,
I'm a very loyal and hardworking gateman Sir,
I'll always stand attention and salute when you driving in and out Sir,
But when armed robber come,
You are on your own Sir

Uchan4u:
Hard work pays

Oga hard work no dey pay abeg,
Na only brain work dey pay,
I'm talking from experience oh,

Just yesterday,
Na so so i go pack 200 blocks for building site carry dey climb upstairs for 2k,
This morning, i never fit still wake up sef, because of body pains,

Oga, don't ever use the term hardwork for guys were dey chop 10million a week for playing one match every weekend,

Make e no make stone boys like me vex oh

11)Contractors:this set of guys are always cheating either their clients or their workers or both,

Na so we go do gateman work for one contractor,
The company were give the contract dey put our salary for book as 40k,
The contractor come dey pay us 15k,
The day were we discover wetin the man dey do us,
We break bottle for him head resign leave the work,
Now sef i don dey regret my decision,
Because since then,
I never see another gateman work do,
Abeg in case una need gateman, abeg pm me,
Make una boy no die of hunger abeg

MrCork:
...she ain't lightskin...she ugly!!(no oofense)

bros,
Are you a robot ?

Pheals:
I remember when they kidnapped winners chaple pastor as oyedepo curse them ...and he refused to pay

Aunty what did the curse achieve?,


Aunty those boys are already cursed like Cain in bible,
Curse no dey work for dia body again,


If dat Pastor go reach dia, him no gree pay ransom, him come dey preach Bible give those boys,


Na for coffin dem go carry am come back oh

I pray he comes back in one piece,


This days were pastors don dey the drive latest Range Rover,

Criminals no dey fear say dem be man of God again oh,

If you be pastor were dey plan to use tithe money dey live opulent lifestyle,

Remember to hire bodyguard like Chris Okotie oh

Airforce1:
This year go make sense for me

I dey see the sign.

here is your sign,
My guy, i get building site were i wan go pack blocks tommorrow,
Na 1k dem dey pay if you fit pack hundred blocks,
Care to join me?,
you fit even succeed, sell atleast 2 of those your music cd join carry 1,200 naira dey go back house

Jesusfallsatan:
My Baby is finer! Just because she is a celebrity thats why dem they use her pikin.

Infact i don vex!

Aunty na the same thing i talk when i see Frank Ordega dey advertise for Etisalat,
Pesin were even as i wowo, him wowo pass my own,
Your vex no go change anything,

Na capitalism cause am


Even Solomon been don forsee am when him talk for Ecclesiastes 9:11 say
'The race is not to the swift

Nor the battle to the strong
Nor does food come to the wise,
Or wealth to the brilliant,
Or favour to the learned,
But time and chance happen to them all'

yinkus4u2c:
Fu*k-rape the artist

Aunty na me be the artist,

When can we see?

At that age,
I don't see President Buhari eating much food,
So instead of him letting our 146million naira go to waste,
He should employ a professional chopper(someone who gets paid to eat) like me,
Put me on the mininum wage,
And designate me Chopper Of The Federal Republic(COFR),

I'm inspired,
But truth is that you need money to be the next Dangote, and i have none,

Abeg in case you wish to contribute to my dream, my bank account is always available and am not afraid to use it

Street certified Blocks Carrier, building site Labourer and occasional gateman right here,
Mbok,
If you have a job for me, use the pm button

What to say on this kind of topic dey always confuse me,
Should i commend Mc Galaxy,
Should i bash him?,
Should i pretend to be happy for him?,
Should i say that's his business?,
Should i join the new craze and say all the Things Mc Galaxy has done has been a hit back to back?,
Abeg make una help me choose one

My guy,

You get luck sef say woman lure you free of charge go disvirgin you,

My own, na me take my leg waka go ashawo house go pay ashawo 1k make she disvirgin me,
I no even ask am her name sef,
The only conversation we had was,

Comot clothe,

Put your prick here,

You don release,

Come dey go,


Na so i take waka leave my virginity for ashawo house.

Lucialovely:
Handsome

Aunty bia,
You are not looking bad either,
You fine oh,
Abeg pm me let's mingle

The only thing were i lack na money, But you fit bring the money and i go bring the love

Boys no get joy dis January oh,


OP, abeg tell your brother make him no try to form Jet Li for dia oh,
If u no wan print gone too soon Posters,
to catch bullet for hand na only for film oh

Abandoned?,
That's an exaggeration,
Why do Nigerians always want to be rewarded financially for representing a country the claim the love?,
This guys were not forced to volunteer, the choosed to,
If you want to do good,
Do good because it's the right thing to do, not because you expect a reward in future.

Farnsworth:
BTW there should be a thread for all Akwa Ibom related gist, that mostly Akwa Ibom people can congregate in

awoden,
Mbok, is vacancy open for a gateman at that hospital?

.

Nubian113:
What are you on about!?. If all you see is hungry girls, and the world is a mirror of you, then the problem of hunger comes back to your doorstep. Hungryboy

see me see wahala oh,
I just dey on my own jeje, pesin come dey mention my name,

Aunty how far,

You wan give me food abi you wan dash me money?

Nice one Dija,
But why people dey always wait until something bad do pesin before dem wan help am,

Na so i dey hungry dey carry blocks for building site, nobody send me, until the day were i make mistake go thief bread chop were police arrest me,
Were my relatives come carry 100k come bail me,
The thing vex me eh,
I even wan return my sef go cell, dem come dey beg me make i come back house

blesoh:
Chisos are you this funny? Lol, u just make my day. Lol

Aunty no be joke i dey,
I be calabar boy and i dey find work,
In case you dey find gateman or pesin were go dey hold your money for you or pesin were you dey dash money were you no wan use,
Abeg pm me.

Ymodulus:
Ha-ha sent to Diamond. Check please or add me to send you alert.

Chairman,no be joke,
The Chairman,
Has delivered ,
I just saw the alert,
No be joke,

My money for food for the week realised,

No carrying of blocks tommorrow again

My oga,
The Solomon of our time,
May your money be uncountable like Bill Gate's,
Your riches never start, by the time you finish with riches, your name go become Rich,
May wealth be thy name always,
May your perfume be affluence,

Chairman,
In case you need gateman am on speed dial oh

Ymodulus:
Sent to your diamond.
Bye

na so chairman,
I never hear the alert, Abi you only send the money keep alert for yourself?

.