₦airaland Forum

Please guys, don't let this thread degenerate to just scoring personal points and insults. There is no need for all that.


@Topic

Ladies should learn to cook for their families or at least attempt to learn.

However, not all ladies want this and as long as they let their intended spouses know or thier families are ok with the decision, then each to his/her own.

I personally know a few Igbo and Yoruba marriages but then i believe people should be able to marry within  their preferences. I know of Hausa and Yoruba marriages especially when both partners are muslims. The least likely match are Hausa and Igbo marriages. More Research needed

If Igbo men are known for marrying within their ethnic groups, then there is no problem with that as long as they don't lead ladies from other cultures on. If people want to marry within their comfort zones and are happy, surely that is better than marrying someone from another tribe just to prove a point.

At the end of the day, for all the words and debates people like to engage themselves in, Nigerians are very tribalistic especially the three major groups. Intermarriage is supposed to be a way of bridging gaps between people and promoting unity, however, nigerians are not very united, are they?

TYNN2:
I know this yoruba lady that told me she was 17 when a married yoruba man of 40 with children in Nigeria uses all whatever in his possition to lured her into having children and practically demonstrated readiness to have her as the second wive. Having manage to immigrate into Europe she still turn down most of my Ibo friends (well to do single guys) that attracted to her (with excuses that she need time to think) only to start dating another Yoruba man that has a wife with children back home in Nigeria.

The lady in question probably suffers from low self esteem. Why would any normal lady be a second wife twice? Sometimes people just make bad judgement calls.

However, how many single nigerian men (no matter the tribe) will want to marry a divorced woman with children?

McKren:
@Imani

Let me gossip a little, heard President Yaradua's daughter is in your school.
Is that true?

I am not aware of such information.  Though while i was at Manchester, there were lots of big men's children around

I think the reason why some women are rebelling may be due to the attitude of some men who think that women should just be about domestic activities.

With regards to cooking, ladies seriously should know how to cook. Except it is impossible due to a medical condition, there is no excuse not to learn to cook at least the basics. The food just needs to be well cooked and not necessarily gourmet style. While men shouldn't be about food, the same also goes to the women. Everyone wants to eat good food and healthy and also cheaply. Having a chef is ok if you can afford it but i have the feeling that not many will be able to employ a chef abroad at least. . . . it is just too expensive.

Family values are fast breaking down with so many problems with relationships. Like someone pointed out, what about the kids? at least they should be enough motivation to want to cook. I am sure most of us can remember when we came home tired from school and food was ready of course prepared by mum! What will be the point in trying to be superior to your husband by refusing to cook. I hope ladies are not thinking being a single mother is fun. Someone also acknowledged that inability to cook may lead to the man's unfaithfulness, well if your husband means a lot to you then you do all you can to keep him. There are lots of single ladies around. Cooking can also be fun and not the hard task it is being made out to be.

While I am all for women being able to express themselves in the workplace and have a voice in the society, however the home and basic family values must not be neglected.

dakmanzero:
Nigerians find it hard to accept that they are probably the most prejudiced and racist people on the planet- they sneer at and look down on EVERYONE, Arabs,chinese, other africans, other Nigerian tribes,indians(this one is horribly prevalent), all except whites, who they worship as though they were gods (except when it comes to scamming them. The prevailing idea is that 'oyinbos are intelligent but not "sharp"')

You are right. Nigerians are quite prejudiced, tribalistic and to an extent racist towards other races. Nigerians also use derogatory names for other tribes such as jamo, chinco, paki etc. Of course other nationalities also do the same so it is not just a nigerian issue.

Even in our own backyard, we have the so called osu that are regarded less than human beings due to some atrocity committed by some ancestors that died ages ago. All this in a land known for so much religiousity.  And then there is the initial troubles when there is a prospect of intermarriage with other tribes.

Back to topic,

While some people may be have some excuse to an extent, especially if there have not been exposed to other tribes and have lived in rural settings most of their lives, those that still insist on lumping all other people together as igbo, hausa or yoruba even after much exposure are just plainly tribalistic.

The Festival was cancelled ?   Hope you got to go for at least one of the days?


That is very annoying but then nigerians sha. . . . .  we too dey like too much owambe

Even if Owen wants to come, he is becoming a spent force. He is injury prone and he doesnt look like he is in the right frame of mind to play competitive football yet.

He has been through a lot especially with the now ill advised move to Real Madrid and then a career stunting move to Newcastle who are not challenging for anything serious.

A major benefit of cooking apart from being safer and healthier as already suggested is the fact that it is cheaper. It is a lot cheaper to cook that to eat out or do take aways, even more so, in this era of ogranic and genetically modified food.

It is important for a woman or a man to at least learn to do some basic cooking of a narrow range of meals if possible. There are lots of recipe books to be used that is where creativity comes in. No one is a custodian of knowledge so learning from books can also be helpful.  But then Oga Iman may complain that the "trial" food is not well cooked.

9ja4eva:
The Way I Are

Abeg my sister, which kind oyibo be dat?

naijaking1:
I agree with you Imani, but I mean a variation on a theme of the traditional concept. You know I'm not referring to a pre-Things Fall Apart society. If there a reasonable reciprocal variation between bread winning and bread making, then you'd understand that[b] it really doesn't matter who wins the loaf and who bakes it.[/b]

Exactly!!!

That is what i have been trying to say that my mouth hand began to ache

99% of Nollywood

No plot, silly storylines that could as well have been thought up by a 10 year old, very monotonous acting by actors and actresses,  no editing, grammatical errors and so on and so forth.

naijaking1:
@Imani

If the couple plans a traditional african family where the man works his ass off every day contributing his 100% to provide food for the family, the best the woman could do is at least try to learn how to bring the food on the table.

Who does that these days? The costs and standard of living is a lot higher these days for a man to be the sole bread winner.

Seriously, will you allow your wife to be a housewife and just do housework all day for the rest of her life? [s]considering must men want to marry female graduates[/s].

Katie Melua - Closest thing to crazy

mukina2:
Mustay am still here

any astray posts . i'll take out my gun

so Imani you actually clicked on his link

Having lived in the UK for many years, i knew it was a joke used by non-Arsenal fans.


@Iman,

Mind your own business. Abi something else dey there

Stop taking medicine for Arsenal's headaches

ogbdcm:
any woman that can't cook got no value and shes not worth being called a woman

Oga @nigerdelta, take ya time o

What exactly do you want from a woman? Don't worry, you can say all that is on your mind

[quote author=I-man link=topic=58825.msg1190059#msg1190059 date=1181515234]Non-Nigerians? You mean those ones with a sky high divorce rate? You mean those ones with record levels of signle parenthood? Give me a break  . . . .very few non-Nigerians have much to teach us when  it comes to stable and long lasting relationships.

Women look at vain issues when deciding whether to date a man . . . income,good looks,phallic lenght,e.t.c(last one was a joke) when we simply ask whether they can cook . . we are supposed to be embarrassed?Utter drivel![/quote]Not all women are concerned with such trivial issues. You are right, some place unrealistic value on fickle things like money. However, some consider character, personality, attitudes to life and maturity as more important.

There is a great deal of pride in being able to cook for one's family. However, we just have to accept not all women will be able to do so. However, that doesn't make her less a women. As long as it doesn't become an issue in the home and the woman is creative and comes up with other idea to compensate for this "anomaly" there really shouldn't be a problem. But ladies should make sure they let their intended spouses know of their cooking ability especially if they are african men

[quote author=I-man link=topic=16992.msg1190024#msg1190024 date=1181514680]The weapon of 4th place   is prospering already 

Hey!Look,you guys are Number 1  -http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/eng_prem/fixtures/default.stm    [/quote]Well else what can i expect from a muppets man united fan?


Don't worry, we will give you guys a run for your money. The title race will be a 4 horse horse race if liverpool can keep up.  I have to accept that this season was terrible but we will bounce back. We always do. So write us off at your own expense. [s]remember we did the double over united in our worst season.[/s]

naijaking1:
@all

before we substitute the question with our individual bias and opinions, the poster was not saying he wants to marry anybody---, he simply wanted to know what to do about a lady who can't cook.

Why do we have to read into every small topic?

@poster
It depends on your long term plans.
If you're planing a traditional naija/african family where you, the man intends to the fetcher of water, hewer of wood and 100% bread winner, then you might like to know if your lady is interested in the 100% house keeping part of the equation which includes cooking for the man, the kids, etc.

Note % may be reciprocaly variable with duties and plans. Your lady can always learn.

However if you don't plan a traditional naija family, or you have no long term plan for this lady, then there is no reason to worry.

Just go for the ride, and enjoy each other with Mr. Biggs.

What will it mean, if he has long term plans and intends to have a traditional setting, but the lady won't/can't learn to cook? Will she still be of any value?

What do you suggest?

[quote author=I-man link=topic=16992.msg1190006#msg1190006 date=1181514398]Didn't someone say yesterday that the News Of the World will publish news about Henry's committment to Arse-anal? What happened?

Henry still hasn't made up his mind yet but he is seriously considering leaving.Can I get some loff from the Gunners? [/quote]No you cannot.


No weapons formed against the mighty Arsenal shall prosper

otoidea:
that ure not gettin some
an advice i like givn grls that go "LMAO" id u laff your ass out, market wont move like before again ooo

continuing to be a nigerian you want to give me some?

nnenneigbo:
buhahahaha
ok muki, i see what u mean, hate is more fun lol

but i love

Like Yoko Ono and John Lennon said, Lets make love not war or hate

davidylan:
thalassemia patients could be AA or AS. It doesnt matter.
Unfortunately most of the hemoglobin mutations seem to have a peculiar affinity for africans 

alpha thalasemia is prevalent among africans and some parts of asia
Beta thalasemia is prevalent among africans and sometimes greeks too. Some other race that i forget now.

Wikipedia has a good write up on thalasemic diseases that you can read up if you need some more detailed info.

Thanks for the information.

@vicjustice, papabrowne, vikiviko, mrpataki


^singing


Let their be love shared amongst us, let their be love in our hearts

There is nothing like a united Nigeria and Nigerians

otoidea:
mani , is that true?

like a typical nigerian , is what true?

davidylan:
thalassaemia is very different from sickle cell disease. while sickle cell disease results from a specific mutation to the beta chain of hemoglobin, thalasemias could be as a result of formation or deletion of one or more of 4 alpha chains and/or one or 2 of the beta chains that encode hemoglobin.
The net effect is the individual generates some abnormal hemoglobin-containing red blood cells thus leading to anaemia/poor oxygen delivery to the tissues.

In most cases, the mild form is prevalent and can be treated with drugs and the patient lives a healthy life.

In order words, someone with thalasemia could still be AA or AS right?

Isn't thalassemia not also prevalent in some parts of the Arab world and certain parts of europe such as greece and turkey?

[quote author=I-man link=topic=58825.msg1189946#msg1189946 date=1181512693]I be Jamie Oliver! One taste of my cooking and you will be hooked  Few women can cook like I can  [/quote]How come i have only be managing all what you have been cooking out of politeness assuming i am who you think i am