₦airaland Forum

mmb:
sheriff visited jonathan in his Abuja house today monday

source: daily corredpondents

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A man who cannot save himself cannot save PDP.

For Sheriff, a drowning man will clutch at a straw.

There is no such thing as PDP or APC. All Nigeria has are politicians that run to each winning side in times of trouble. No ideology. No principles.

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ipreach:
I have been thinking since afternoon because of somethings I have being experiencing. I had a pregnant colleague in the office whom I always tell that she was carrying a baby boy in her womb but she blatantly told me that scam showed that it was the opposite but I refuse to accept the scam result, reason being that anytime I saw her I feel the presence of a boy.

Guess what.

Today she called that my prophesy has came to pass. She has given birth to a handsome BBB.

This is the fourth time I am predicting the gender in a pregnant woman and non has failed.

I have also predicted events, different type of sporting activities and all have been perfect.

My question now is.

Have I been called by God to be a prophet or is it just normal to other people?

Should I go and open a prophetic ministry?

Please, advice me.

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Why not?

No one says you have to be right.

Just say it like you mean it.
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Erngie:
God Has blessed this man. If you continue to judge him, you might not get one-tenth of he's got till you leave this earth. Allow God to deal with pastors..they aren't your business

LOL.

I forgot that Nigerians only count blessings in pounds and dollars.

Heck! That's why they give national honorary awards to looters and criminals.

Get money (even if from the poor and downtrodden) and it is God's blessing.

The MMM dude will tell you that God blessed him after scamming many Nigerians--afterall the evidence is there: More money in the bank!

You guys are nuts!

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Underlying all the brouhaha is the lack of trust among Nigerians. Most people are out to scam one another thus exacerbating what is already a precarious situation.

Do you need dollars from BDC? Of course not. But with fraudsters around, it is the safest bet. There are many ways of accessing forex below parallel market rates but the Nigerian factors are big hinderance.
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spyder880:
I am setting them aside for multi service use, people who will live here will need schools for their children. 3 plots of land can build a good school. There must be space set aside for one or two medical centres, at least a health/fitness area where a field or green are will be positioned for outdoor sports or events. Then we shall need corner plots where we can set up shops or malls, bars, restaurants, beauty shops and salons serving the needs of those who live in the estate.

Then some plots will be used to build the administrative offices, security posts and waiting area. If we do not mark them out now, it will be almost impossible to do when the plots are all sold out.

Thanks for clarifications

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Ultimate test:

Give money to the pastor.

If he/she returns it and tells you to go in peace, then he is
up to something greater than him/her.
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They chose a man who had expended the better part of life on earth to lead the future. As we speak, they are warming up to throw up another grandpa to rule Nigeria. The youths are not raising eyebrows. They believe that an elder must be respected and not be challenged, even if the elder leads them to hell.
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nwabobo:
This is pathetic. Some of you guys that have sharp mouth should go there to the page and defend your country instead of killing each other here on Nairaland.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10155227472216842&substory_index=19&id=100001201493891

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As abhorable as it is, I don't know why Nigerians find it difficult to believe that people can fight against oppression unlike in Nigeria where everyone is docile.

Nigerians love suffering and smiling. Indians, Lebanese, Asians, etc come to Nigeria and enslave Nigerians. They commit all sorts of atrocities and Nigerians bend over backwards and take it with smile.

Sorry. But the citizens of other countries have their elastic limits and will snap back when pushed. I guess it is the fighting back against machination of a few that is alien to Nigerians.
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Ponzi scheme is a good business.
The greatest challenge is knowing when to quit.
Greed had always nailed the best of the best.
The two most powerful emotions in life: Greed and fear.
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They should have ignored Deji.

It is not every statement that deserves a response.

What can he do?

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Spyder880:

Just out of curiosity. Or perhaps real estate business in Nigeria is different: What is Real Estate services that will take 12 out of 82 plots. Are those for administrative offices?

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Hopefully they won't leave him there overnight.

There could be gay folks around.

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SalamRushdie:
Believe me that guy and his boys are not any different..Dem dey spoil cars pass sef

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Central District Abuja: There is an auto workshop there owned by some guy that lives in Washington DC. It turns out to be the dumping ground for exotic cars. The owner showed up in a fancy car and twisted American accent, the so-called Abuja big men got sold. Someone took his Cadillac Escalade there and abandoned it there out of frustration. That is 6 years and counting.

The guy he mentioned may be good. But then you think about it, it doesn't take much to impress Nigerians. If in doubt, think about all the accolades they pour on the Engineering students that weld pieces of scrap metals together and call it a race car.

There is no such thing as the "best mechanic in Nigeria". If he fixes all cars, that's the more reason to stay away from him. If he doesn't, what qualifies him and by whose assessment is he the best? Coming from a guy who didn't know that engine oil mixing with coolant was the cause of the white smoke from his car, I give up.
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spectator2001:
1. I am not a mechanic but I could have diagnosed the problem with your car.

Diagnosis wasn't the problem, that was done and supposedly "fixed" by the authorized dealership as mentioned in my post.

2. ROlls Royce cars have specific and special diagnostic tools.

You guys should stop making these shits look like some rocket science. An Olympian in Australia here, my neighbor ONLY consult Ferrari for parts! Dude fixes EVERY GODDAMN PROBLEM of his Enzo by himself although with a clear caveat transferring all risks to him, does that make his Rari "undriveable" afterwards? For sure not!

3. They will direct you straight to RR's licensed dealership.

yeah, if they do not possess the necessary skill sets required in undertaking such task, they'd absolutely refer. I don't see why a well grounded mechanic who's acquired optimal level of experience from these luxurious dealership shouldn't set up a personal workshop if he's got the resources. Such workshop would surely close in no time if his services are deemed poor or mediocre by his patrons.

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1.Authorized dealers in Nigeria will still hire those half-baked mechanics to cut costs. Although even in developed nations, dealerships mess up as well.

2. It is not rocket science. But developed countries (due to liability issues) will not fix what they are not equipped or trained to fix. Nigerians will put a golf engine in a Mercedes. Will Australians do that? Your neighbour might be an Olympian, but do you know his other background? Is Olympian a profession?

3. Talk about fixing cars and things. Some people do it as a hobby. A typical oga in Nigeria will not do it because it doesn't support or bestow a toga of "bigmanism". Besides the guy in Australia can easily go out and rent the needed tools to fix his enzo. Can you do that in Nigeria? Some mechanics do show up with chisel and hammer to loosen bolts in a car in Nigeria. Accept the fact.

Oyibo do not fix cars. They diagnose, find out what the problem is, replace the parts and off you go. Mechanics in Nigeria will glue, re-glue, weld, unweld and re-weld before the owner decides to buy a replacement part. If Tokunbo parts don't make the cut per affordability, they modify an existing part. There are better ways of doing things. Of course, there are witches and wizards to blame when the inevitable happens.
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Reference:
Well, I have said it as I see it. If you are going to repair a car that cost me 100 million to buy, I will simply not tolerate this especially if my bill will be six figures. There is no way the paint on that Phantom will not be scratched with the pictures I am seeing. A simple N20,000 cozy around the engine bay of such a car is mandatory to any work on that engine. But as it is with many Nigerian businesses THEY KNOW that people with such cars DONOT HAVE ALTERNATIVES so there is no incentive to upgrade. You go to the clinic of the only specialist in a locality and you are likely going to be treated badly. My own idea of things is that when one creates a model of things well and properly done it attracts more business and those who will ordinarily not buy these exotic cars because they cannot be maintained will do so. It makes more sense to upgrade. These mechanics will be making a bucket load of money. Let us see it. That black looking, scruffy wall behind looks....one kind abeg. Have you seen Julius Berger's auto workshop... mind you cars is not their primary business.

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That is the more reason foreigners take over major projects in Nigeria. From Arabs and Lebanese in road construction to Togolese and Ghanaians in building construction. God forbid a typical Nigerian puts finesse in his/her work. Everything ends with "good enough". No creativity, no innovations.
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spectator2001:
Odu-B!

No jokes, this is the best auto-mechanic in Nigeria! When I drove a really luxurious Mercedes Benz back in my days in Unilag. I had issues with some overheating problems. I proceeded to some Mercedes Benz well-recognized autoshop on Lekki-Epe expressway. Yes, they supposedly 'fixed" the problem for some outrageous fees. Two weeks later same problem again, I called to inform them that right now I can't even move out of my premises, the smoke popping out of the engine became scary like some movie!

Then someone introduced this young man to me, I called and informed him of my location, he drove down in this really sleek E-Class- his personal car too! He checked the vehicle and I told him of what they did at Benz place and all, he just laughed and he called some guy on the phone to send one or two parts down- THAT FIXED IT FOR ETERNITY! I drove the car to Abuja and Ilorin four times in 2 weeks instead of flying as usual. The engine was cool as sh.it!

For those of you calling him "Kazeem", I forgive you for you don't know what you are saying! He is the personal auto-mechanic to most first class monarchs in South West and South South and also top politicians in these states too. They fly him to their states, for your information. I've gone to the airport to pick him most times! Their exotic Benzes, Maybachs, Range Rovers, RR Phantoms are well serviced and maintained by this dude. Lol, Odu-B nor vex, I don cast you!

Odu_B, since I comot Naija, Popsy don complain say you dey scarce these days, you nor dey quick carry phone self! lol, Continue!

God bless you bro!

I am not a mechanic but I could have diagnosed the problem with your car. Folks buy cars for the look and pose without taking a minute to understand the machine.
ROlls Royce cars have specific and special diagnostic tools. The owner is probably looking for a quick fix to get the car home to retire in the garage for eternity.
Most Nigerians do not pay attention to details. Will the RR drive after the butched surgery? Probably. But the difference will be clear. For the guy talking about mechanics in US, 99.9999% of them will not even open the hood. They will direct you straight to RR's licensed dealership. Nigerians hate specialization. One has to be jack of all trade and then take glory in churning out mediocrity.

If you want to buy a used car in Nigeria, a good sales pitch is that the car has not been touched by a mechanic in Nigeria. That statement tells all the stories.

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GossipHeart:

How ignorant are people ??

In the USA, auto mechanics all have license and went to school for about 1 year before they can fix cars and they still use machine to detect the faults on the car

Come to Nigeria, the guy you call kazeem who never went to primary school will fix a Ferrari without the help of any machine

Who do you want to fix cars ?? A guy in suit who has an auto repair shop in Eko hotel ??

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Yeah.

Take a newer car to those mechanics and learn the hard way.

The picture shown by OP is depicted to capture the joke.

Don't be surprised that the mechanic will crawl under, com
e out with a part and try to convince the owner that the part doesn't do anything. That's why a N20k fix ends up gulping N200k. It doesn't help that a lot of the so-called big men cannot differentiate between a spark plug and oxygen sensor.
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MrMcJay:
They were shot by soldiers.

The official reports stated that they were short by a combined team of police, army and DSS.
The CP had to be aware before such atrocities are carried out.

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The spirits of murdered innocent IPOB fellas at work?

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Nigerians are dealing with the unknown.

A bus heading from Lagos to Abuja, got to Lokoja and another driver took over and got it to the final destination.
Yet the passengers are claiming that they didn't know the destination is Abuja.

GEJ supervised the squander of your commonwealth. What you are living now is the aftermath. $2.1b given to Dasuki alone is more than the 2016 budgetary allocations of Abia, Adamawa, Anambra, Bauchi, Enugu, Ekiti, Gombe, Katsina, Kogi, Kwara, Niger and Nasarawa states combined.

Yet some of you pretend that they don't know the truth.
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BMW 7 series-- worst car money can buy.

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enshi:
It was exactly two years yesterday since i started reconstructing my body... Here is how far i have gone with my chest.. . Pls comment ur reserve

+ any one here who needs an experinced, Corporate bouncer, body guard (private and public) can call...

That's my problem with bodybuilding.

Their only aspiration is to guard other people with money.

Onyejemechimere:
This just came in From Emotional Chioma, she said she is caught between two men, one she loves but broke her heart and the other she is dating but does not love. She wants your advice on who to choose.

Read her story below


"I am 29 years old. I need your candid advice in terms of my relationship."

"I used to date a black guy who I fell in love with but he broke up with me because he said I was a bit stubborn and he thinks I’m self centered. I pleaded with him not to end the relationship, even family members intervened all to no avail. He still ended it and I was really heartbroken. He has got three kids (white kids) and he is still single."

"During our breakup I met a 34 year old white guy who I started dating. This guy is nice, caring and he loves me but he said he is not ready to get married yet but we can have babies together. Now the black guy whom I’m still in love with is back and asking for a new beginning all over again. He wants us to settle down together."

"My problem is I’m so confused about him because of the way he acted. I’m still in love with him not minding the fact that he has kids already but I still have the white guy who I am dating but I don’t love him. I don’t know who to settle with for life."

What do you think she should do?

The answer is simple.

She needs to work on herself to stop attracting only losers.

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Tonto said that Igbo guys did not consider her a wife material.

So she ran to Yoruba guys. She got her prince charming.

Oh well...what an elders sees sitting down, a boy cannot see standing up.

Jibril659:
I can't put on a bag branded ABA FOR ICPC How are we supposed to grow the naira when we cannot even give our products a proper brand.

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They have target customers--those who can afford it and those with common sense.

You can continue with Chinese products laced with carcinogenic materials. Feel free.
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lonelydora:
And he forgot that the saying "touch not my anointed and do my prophet no harm"

I hate this Daddy Freeze.

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You believe that he is anointed because he said so?

No wonder every Dick and Harry claim to be "annointed". Yet they are all over the place committing atrocities.

Free yourself from mental slavery. They are businessmen masquerading as men of God.
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Soleymania:
Nigerians are always funny.... U are aware of professionals, to pay a service fee is the problem.. You have money to buy land, but to engage a professional in the field ,u don't have money.. Pls build 10 ( 4 bedroom duplex) on the plot.

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LOL.

OP: There you have it!
I no wan hear collapsed building bc you are too cheap to do the right thing.
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toprealman:
That's why he is here so that professionals will help out.

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Someone who has a 50x100 plot that he intends to develop knows the steps to follow. You can testify to the seriousness of the question from the jokes he is getting in replies.

Architects are "paid" professionals. If he can afford to develop a 50x100 plot, he sure can afford a professional guidance.
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jesus500:
I salute his doggedness but many of them are after fame. Nothing else. Is he really a crusader or a rabble rouser?

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You are educated.
You can read and write.
Why don't you start your own investigative journalism?
You people are quick to criticize when you can't even lift a finger to save yourself even if your life depends on it.
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Washing off mud from your car after use on Nigeria roads is the same as using sandpaper on your car. Some car wash places up it a notch by using plastic sponges to wash cars.

bulakos:
Mr common sense If you no get anything to contribute make common use of your sense

I am glad he is getting all the mock answers he needs.

He knows what to do if he is serious.

Why not talk to an architect?

I would think it is a common sense.