₦airaland Forum

Khd95:
I have this feelings that ur hubby too is a nairalander,always with his phone to see if there is any news about lala and snakes,tonto dike,hush puppi and gucci buhari and london....the list is endless

suggestion;wait fo the elders of nairaland to arrive first

very funny!!!
three days ago I couldn't log out of NL and was very busy with it! I was in bed and my wife really thought I was chatting up someone (a babe maybe, you know they always feel it's babes)
See wetin NL dey cause!!

Christians don't become atheists ...they just become disbelievers or backsliders. take note of the difference

sammykess:
You know quiet well churches are guided by laws, some are biblical and others are self driven...

see Rom14:23 says whatever is not of faith is sin...what does ROM 17:10 say? faith comes by hearing the word of God. that means any law made by any church that's not found in the Bible is wrong and only made to accommodate the desire of the founders of that church. that's the reason you hear pastors telling you God "told" them...you will be too scared to question that won't you? that's how they trap people! do a survey and see.

sammykess:
Nice One, I don't know if it's biblical, because they will tel you that you must follow biblical standards. It's like this, the pastor will confront the sister with a mask identify of the brother and see if God has reveal the name of the brother to the sister

I'm sorry but there's no place in the bible where law of marriage is given as doctrine ... God made it a cultural thing as long as it does not violate the standards of God. no pastor has right to tell you to follow any laid down principle or rules like you mentioned above. most people REVERENCE pastor more than God. have you checked your Bible to find out what God says about marriage abi you think your pastor knows better.
if you like her tell her straight if she likes you great...plan together then for courtesy's sake tell your pastor. if he gets annoyed that you should have told him before making a move then you know its out of selfish reasons he's doing so. he can't make law for God where God has not made any!

while other African players are struggling to be signed for high amounts and are being recognized for their abilities on the pitch most Nigerian players are "stars" on low leagues and are star bench warmers! they make headlines on papers only! Mo Salah Elneny and others are climbing...our players are showing off wealth and women! go ahead!

July 7th

personal59:
hmmm, sincerely I lagged in this are because I don't know who her friends just because am not always around but will work better on that area

you should then find time and let her invite her friends home so you can also know them. with time you will then use an opportunity to talk with them. don't form a habit of telling her "I don't want to see you with this or that girl" even if that girl "looks" or "behaves" wayward. you may just be the change agent for that girls life... I'm now talking from experience.

personal59:
hmmm, sincerely I lagged in this are because I don't know who her friends just because am not always around but will work better on that area

ok...
make time and ask here to invite her friends then have a great time with them.
even if any of her friends is "looking" wayward never condemn her or say "I don't want to see you wit that girl!" that girl may just be lacking in guidance and you might just be the one to be the change agent!

Candybob:
Ruggedy is 100% on point..

Message Excellent

Construction Excellent

Delivery Excellent

now compare this very humble presentation to the ones who were just shooting from the hip! it takes good reasoning for development to be achieved not name calling! way to go ruggedman!

personal59:
thank you brother on closeness we are very close just don't know how to start or end nd the person in question is my junior sister 12-13yrs of age and will be in ss1 upon resumption since we all know how it all goes as far back 2001 wen I was in that class too am scared cos crush will start and abnormal exposure etc just post it as a parent so as to know hw to go about it.
thanks once again and on closeness we are way too close been the last born

I'm happy to hear you're close. its very vital.
well, break the ice and your wife should also be part of the discussion. always read for greater knowledge in advance so they will believe you know EVERYTHING!! that way they won't seek knowledge anywhere else.

mostly you will find that its not a topic for everyday. try to find a convenient time that has a relaxed atmosphere... then casually chip in one or two things...
subsequently you will graduate into ADVICE.
meaning you will now be in a better position to advice about what to do and how to cope with friends or peers who surround them daily.
one thing ...always allow their peers into your home so as to monitor their activities. be friendly to their pals too so they will always love to be around you...then you use the opportunity to discuss with them together. you will realize they (your kids and their pals) will bond to you better and always want to hear from you ...

good.
this usually is clumsy to most parents and most times procrastination comes in and the issue is shelved and the children are left to their own and whatever they learn about that may not be as worthy as when parents teach the children.
recently the need to start early has become necessary because the children themselves are exposed so early especially from movies and obscene music videos that have now become the norm.
if you have been friendly with your kids from onset it becomes easier to talk about sex to them without being shy or clumsy.
you may take the opportunity when for instance you're all watching a movie and a steamy scene is shown...use that as impulse to start the topics on sex and sex education. of course be sure that the younger crew are exempted.
soft questions like "do you know what happened between the man and woman in the movie as they lay in bed?"
their answers will generate more questions and make sure you assure them they're free to talk RESPECTFULLY about the topic.
never make jesting or scornful remarks about the subject or about anyone.
create in them the notion that sex is for adults and MARRIED adults. always in a gentle way tcondemn premarital sex.
mention the inherent consequences and be sure to always respect their comments and contributions.
try to also make them value their bodies and understand that flaunting and exposure of flesh doesn't glorify the MAKER rather debases the person and exposes such person to abuse and sex crimes...
like I said their comments and questions will help you chart the way you will also go about talking teaching and training them on the topic. cheers.

kai. the way you described the "average". Nigerian man weak me o! if you do have a boyfriend or husband or father or brother, are they above the average you mentioned?
i kmow you were trying to get us to see the sitiation but reducing us to that level in the language you used isnt proper please. if you dont mind you can rephrase your statements...thank you.

234GT:
That is not an excuse for me to cheat those who are not employed. I earn 7 times of what npower pays after tax. My conscience will not allow me rest if I cheat unemployed youths, because I was also unemployed at a time, and my getting my current job is by God's grace.

thank you God bless you. reading through the comments shows the mindset of most of us my brother, no matter how well the government means to alleviate the problems of the youth we will still remain sacarstic and indolent. yet the same are crying there's no work while brushing aside this opportunity. what else do we want for crying out loud?
maintain your integrity sir! I salute you!

Ehiscotch:
Whenever I see this kinda threads on NL and read its comments, I just weep for Nigeria.
Like aren't they ever tired of being tribalists all day.

my dear I tire o! when the names are mentioned their tribesmen never raise objection to these acts but rip the whole of NL down when the pendulum swings in another direction. what's our gain? suppose the secession succeeds is this the "glory" your fellows will give you internationally?
let's be reasonable and objective pls. somehow I'm getting fed up with NL.

most people just break simple rules for making comments on NL! they've nothing in their minds other than insults and spewing thrash. and funny enough these group seem to all come from a part of this country that's known for empty boasts...
my submission:
take a cue from Usain Bolt. he's decided that no endorsements or publicity or whatsoever that has him as centre will be done OUTSIDE Jamaica! ask him! he's said Jamaican youth need the jobs therefore all photoshoots etc must be done in Jamaica.... that's patriotism.
here we are on nairaland just embarrassing our Prez and our very selves ...

oh dear...I'm speechless! you mean a mother supports her own daughter in the act of exposure of private parts if this is true I expect women who still have virtue to come out and stage a very serious protest! if this is allowed to ride then I know 90% hope of sanity being restored is down the drain....
I'm very sorry to hear this from a mother!

once you become overprotective and don't give your child freedom to explore or express himself he will surely lie to avoid your beam .
again you're harsh and too judgemental of your child's work, words, friends, games, attitude and leisure that child will be under EXTREME pressure, then LYING becomes his second nature even if he has genuine intentions and purpose because he'll feel you won't approve or you don't trust his abilities!

it is quite abnormal. we're talking about adults here not children. are you saying if your parents or hers were around she'll feel so comfortable? not surprised though that it's the woman who's going unclad. if it were the guy the woman will never accept his explanation!
now imagine you have kids, should you expect them to see you unclad? would you expect them to accept it as "normal"? pls advice your wife, these scenes leads to porn and other unsavory sex crimes if one isn't careful.
cheers.

1234IKECHhukwu:
look at who is talking,how many ladies have u helped in ur life freely without having any ulterior motive in ur heart,one thing about helping this strange ladies without attaching anything to it is that they 'll see u as a mugu or tend to see it as their right which is very bad on their own side.

my guy I'm not here to boast about anything but from your name I'm not surprised that you speak like that cos that's your character.
whether they see you as mugu or not is irrelevant, do what you have to and keep your heart clean...if you can't then don't help just tell them in clear terms what they should expect and if they agree then....

congrats to them both, it's great challenge and they scaled through,! now, those that are able to do same, the ball is in your court. don't date slayers don't date for sex don't date for fun plan a life with a guy/girl and see how things go!!!

oh maaannn...when will we learn to freely give and not expect anything back? personally I hate to relate with men who feel they must taste the Lady they want to help. I get pissed off. that's why corruption will remain our guest for a long time to come. on the other hand females cause these problems. when you offer help to a Lady in distress they tend to "attach" a "I can also offer my body in support of your help" and this easily sends bad signals to the male folk. I'm talking from experience!! ladies PLEASE do the world a favour don't attach yourself as collateral just cos of help from a human!!! men, fear what God can do...if you don't believe in God...fear karma. I rest my case.

carammel:
In addition to this, once a woman starts running away from sex, then the man begins to threaten "i will go after other women o", some women do not care and from here,the man gets another woman pregnant and the population keeps increasing
I think government or bodies in charge of the family planning programme should make vasectomy compulsory for men's if they're actually want to control population :Did,a woman shouldn't be the only one to face the consequence of doing family planning.

right!
lots of times women don't help matters especially when the man hardly shows concern about impregnating his wife. a woman will run away from sex claiming tiredness or for frivolous reasons like "is sex food?"
I honestly believe that a couple should truly and wholly be one...in thoughts and deed especially in raising kids. so BOTH should discuss together and go together for counsel and when a choice of contraception is made they should also be there for each other. most men just feel its a woman's duty to determine how and when to protect herself from conception and unfortunately most women feel I should not tell my husband I'm not pregnant o after all we've been having sex regularly!
sort yourselves out!! that way no unwanted pregnancy no population explosion!

chii8:
Please, what are the side effects of these contraceptives? Don't tell me they don't have any, especially the IUCD (coil).

of course there are side effects but before you start on any contraception you must see your doctor first and he will advise accordingly. the IUCD I must say has the best performance with minimum stress but like I said see your Doc first. cheers.

sometimes "news" is based on sensationalism.
minna flooded- yet what we're seeing is low lying areas that are perennially flooded and are really swamps!
its 2:25pm now, minna looks like it never rained at all!! dry!!! why do people enjoy making things look as though we're a cursed nation? now with that "news" some guys have taking to bemoaning our "situation" blaming the President as though it's within his powers to stop rains!
the fires that consumed lives in England recently, were they sent as punishment to the English because they want to exit the EU? natural hazards are not because of one person or the other else Japan and Turkey would be extinct by now....
Nigerians. learn to appreciate where you live and follow simple constituted authority. haba!!!

not surprised anyway but I really don't think a girl irrespective of her age or status should put up a pic of this nature on the net. looking at her feet tells a lot about her state of wellbeing. slack slippers and the environment where this pic was taken shows you the calibre of her thoughts and maybe actions.
I don't want to sit in judgement but I think she's made herself vulnerable to lust, unwanted pregnancy and eventually poverty.
questions arise, where are here parents?
what's their opinion on socialization of youth?
have they ever cautioned their children on the evils of the society?
it's a difficult situation...

thanks for the throw back bro...
i remember that match as though it were yesterday...also watched it live with most of other games then
really he deserved the match but we know he was robbed.
hope we can see were we need to charge u our patrotism to enable us excel.

Rukkydelta:
Where can a find a man like you?

they are usually found when you are objective and a bit laid back
realistic and show dexterity
just keeo your eyes open

Legalbeing:
why will they learn to respect the father?

simple,if a man does all this to honour his wife and compliment her then it is the wifes duty to honour and respect him in turn by praising him often in the presence of his children and commenting to the children how lucky they are to have a father that loves his family enough to go even beyond his normal duties to keep the family together. Once she is also seen doing the chores alongside the man and including the children in the house work and not dishing out orders the children will definitely grow up witrh a sense of responsibility and respect for their dad.

Legalbeing:
I use to wake up 5.am everyday sometimes before my wife.
Am absolutely happy doing lovely thing for my wife. I enjoy cooking breakfast, washing dishes, sweeping the restroom bath the children and many more. During weekends i use to wash all the cloths willingly, If the child poo i dont wait for my wife to take it off, i know how to do it...

Several occasion i over heard my Neighbour Jonah telling my friend that am a woman wrapper. Many will gossip at my back, my front and everywhere. my wife sometimes out of what people will say started to refuse my help even when she is exausted, she will try not to show a sign..

Why is it that men dont help out in doing home chores?...
Is it a law that when a man marries he is immune and he's not suppose to do home chores? Am tired and i think i want to stop

My dear... We're in same situation o! No difference between us! Keep it up ...your kids will learn to respect you...kudos once more.

DonEd:
Its high time we stopped posting and commenting on pictures of women and their curves or what not. What happened to promoting women to be better wives, better mothers or better members of a corporate organisation or even the society?

Nairaland is used to be one stop for a whole lot of informative topics but now a haven for irrelevant stuffs.

Over and out.

Seconded! All this display of private parts does not equate to common sense or business acumen. Why don't the oyibos stress all this? Because they're working night and day to improve! This "parts" will lose their appeal soon and the babe discarded like used toilet paper...let's make nairaland a thinktank of ideas and progress...I rest my case

DanXplore:
Yes...i see your point. There is also a thin line between correct discipline and over protectiveness. wisdom is needed to operate within the limits of appropriate discipline. I trust you will find a way to explain to your wife. Another thing is one should always let the child know and understand his wrong else the so called discipline will be misconstrued by the child

Thank you sir for the advice...and yes I always let them know when they're wrong and let them know how to feel when correction is administered strongly. Thanks again.