₦airaland Forum

kindex:
I can see innoson motor.

That's the vehicle Anambra state govt procured for local vigilantee. On the driver's door is written AVS, meaning Anambra Vigilantee Service.

NigeriaB:
Wait o, wetin Una dey use garri do sef...?
Personally, I don't like eba swallow. I only drink garri once in a while..

I prefer semo to eba

Garri is the easiest swallow to make and it goes well with any kind of soup.
I love semo but I can't stand the time in making it when I'm really hungry plus I have to eat a very large quantity before I get full. But just one cup of garri and I'm ok.

Nomanlike:
Good morning Nairalanders..

There's this gal i want to break up with.. She has always been kind to me and we loved us.. But the thing is I'm a graduate who's trying to put his life in order and i don't think i can afford anything called concrete relationship right now.. She's in 200 level and y'all know how these students girlfriends can be especially when we are not assisting them financially.. At first i thought it was a fling until shiii got serious.. I want to remain focused and not have any gal emotional attached to me.. I want to break up with her but the thing is she loves me so much (i know cos she let me read chats of niggas asking her out, picks every call if we together and speak with freedom and she tell niggas I'm the main guy) and might not understand if i tell her the reason for break up is i want to stay fully focused and not think about my gal taking dick etc..
Brothers how best can i break this news to her ??!

Bros don't break up with dat girl. I see nothing wrong she has done. Most importantly, her love for u is greater than urs for her. That's the kind of girl sharp guys look out for, if u know.
I won't say much, but if u do break up with her I bet u dat u will someday wish u neva did.

Abfinest007:
i have said many times u can only train ur wife not ur gf

After she don born like 2-3 kids for you. That way u keep her committed and u also hav something to hold on to incase she messes up. School life can be so unpredictable. I don't trust any student be u man or woman when it comes to fidelity.

U see am now? when they tell u guys not to venture into a relationship while u are still struggling financially una no go hear. u ppl will be talking bullcrap of how love conquers all. Do u know what those small small money ranging from 2-5k u used to give her can do for u if saved overtime? Truth is u will struggle more if u dare venture into a relationship when u are not financially stable as a man. Too much pressure, no peace of mind, suspicion here and there. Infact if u were meant to stabilize in 2 years, it will take u additional 2-3 yrs becos of ur relationship. A lady can be 16, and broke but will still have a wonderful relationship but not so for a 30 yr old man. Get hold of ur emotions buddy. Na friends with benefits sure pass now cos body no be firewood. Friends with benefit too sweet abeg.

U see this one, na patience and humility u go use win am.

Oga no come and kill urself by urself. Ur wife must be contributing her own quota no matter how small. If she has no job let her find one. To be honest the burden u are carrying is the major reason u are not making much progress. If ur wife (helpmate) can't help out then who will? No die b4 ur time.

11. MINERS. Somebody will come and be digging his own grave....small thing,BOOM! earth don bury u be dat.

faithfull18:
In your mind abi

Nairaland is not faceless afterall. We have had cases like this before...may be this might just be another one.

faithfull18:
You know her right and you are in her mind

So u are the one ehn...? Good u showed up.

She is not into you. Move on.

cutegentility:
Thanks you for reply. It really helps a lot.

U are welcome. If it's possible, get back as member of that group. Apologize to them and carry on with the biz of the group without seeking for her attention. If she engages u, flow like nothing really happened. U need to take control of ur emotions. That's how real men do. Allow things to play out naturally, don't force things to happen.

Add her up on facebook,leave a comment on her post that is engaging. Do this on several occassions and the tension will ease up.(pls don't chat her up). I bet u next tym ur paths cross, both of would be smiling at each other. OR when next u see her, tell ur guy to strike a convo with her,then u tease her like "u dey carry face for me nah, etc" . OR when next u see her start teasing her like "U no dey talk to me nah cos I no reach ur level". Make her laugh while saying this. U need to first ease the tension between u two before u engage her in a convo. Trust me dat girl has noticed u and is waiting for u to open up first. Any wrong move will make things even harder.

So within this short stay with them u have already known their marital problems? U see why some partners don't like their in-laws visiting? Oga/madam my advice for u is to focus on ur job search and leave ur sister's marriage issues. Don't be the third party that will cause this marriage to break up. Ur sister knew her husband very well from the start and they hav been getting along notwithstanding. At least u didn't mention domestic violence even though the man had been an acoholic way before they got married. So what's the fuss about? U are now finding faults here and there cos u are close abi? Steer clear of this union. Find ur job in peace or better still go get married and handle it the best way u think and leave ur sister to handle her own. Thank you.

We all make mistakes in life. And u have done the honourable thing by apologizing. Her being uptight is her biz. Move on with ur life. Stop the endless apology cos that makes u needy, desperate and irritating. I bet u one day she would turn around and apologize for being uptight. What is so special about her by the way? Stop making ppl feel more imporant than they really are. Forget that lady.

[quote author=frowland post=86592440]Young lady, you have no idea! ...and it's me speaking for 98.939% of married men. Na man dey behind that moniker o!

Must u kill urself to stay fit? Ur body is telling u "no" and u are forcing it. What happened to other forms of exercise? How about cycling? Try cycling and u won't think of jogging again. Wholistic and fun-filled.

Once beaten twice shy. Until u quarrel with some ppl, they will always mess with u. If this is how u want ur work environment to be, then it's up to u. But if I were u, I will not take it cool wit her. Highest I will not get back my money but I will have my peace from henceforth and that's the most important thing if u must grow.

This is where u are required to act as the man. Getting emotional about the whole issue just like ur wife will ruin everything. Quit being emotional and device a practical way of solving ur marital problems. Real men are problem-solvers. And it takes a real man to build his family. Forget about whatever she had said. Women will always say hurtful things without considering the implication,that's their nature. Sit ur wife down and have a heart-to-heart talk with her. Maybe u've been overbearing all this while without knowing. Allow her to make suggestions on how to make things start working again. Then find a common ground between her opinion and urs. Relationship such as marriage is built on compromise. No marriage is perfect and most marriages just like any endeavour suffer many challenges from the beginning. Ur ability to manage these challenges will determine the longivity of such endeavours. U will grow past this phase if u are willing to work together. Mind u love is never enough.

Just get a job or start a small biz so u can take care of urself and ur baby. Once he notices dat u no longer depend on him for survival, he will start giving u ur respect as the wife. It may not make him to change and start loving u, but at least u will have ur respect in the house and dat's what u need right now. Stop folding ur hands and sitting at home complaining, get up and do something. Even if u hav no money or where to work, talk to ur people. There is no how u will explain ur predicament to at least 3 persons and u will not find help. God will surely use somebody to help u. The worst thing dat can happen to u is keeping silent. Open up!

Work from home then. There are a lot of businesses and services u can do/render from home. Find the one that suits u, get the skill and earn. Good thing is, a good number of them require little capital to set up. *** Change ur moniker to female as the poster above suggested so ppl can take u serious***

Jeep liberty, Jeep Cherokee, Mazda tribute

Social media can contribute to that. I don't hav insonia but it takes me longer time to sleep when I stay online after 10:pm. Know the time u normally feel sleepy and stay away from social media few hours to that. Instead download a boring movie and force urself to watch it or read a boring book,that can help too. Also take a cold bath shortly before ur bedtime and set ur phone at auto off.(mine goes off at 11:30 pm. by then i must have slept. I hate being woken by calls in the middle of the nite). I make it a rule not to chat,make or pick calls after 11 pm cos it interfers with my sleep. Study ur biological time and stick to what works for you. We all have different biological time.

RapistOnBail:
Even the internet self wen dem say money dey, I never know how.

Money dey internet true true but it's not for everybody. Some are cut out for online biz while others are meant for offline. Know where u belong and cast ur net,u will surely catch enof fish. Dangote no dey do online biz but look at where he is today. Man know thy self.

visijo:
January Is The Best Time To Pay Bride Prize...Right Now Families Will Accept Anything.

LOL.... I think I will consider this when the time comes. I'v always applied it in my shoppings, never knew it applies to marriage too.

When u keep silent expecting people to do the right thing,most times they don't and u end up feeling bad. Only a very few still hav a functional common sense to do the right thing without being told. So ur girlfriend/boyfriend is not reciprocating ur kind gesture and all u do is come on nairaland and whine that Nigerian ladies/men are stingy? So how does that change the situation? Why not confront ur partner? Personally, when I give,I expect u to give in return. And if u don't,I tell u straight up. If u however refuse to change, I let u go. SIMPLE! I don't have time for nonsense.

Your wife should start doing something to augument ur income. If she already has something doing, she should contribute meaningfully to ease to load otherwise you or that union would crash sooner or later. The responsibility is too much for one person that's why u are two. No kill ursef by ursef.

softwerk:


I see no actress here because I've never seen her movies, only a spent horse and a troop of old layers on a mission!

I'm not sure a lady is behind this moniker cos this bashing is so not lady-like. What happened to ladies having each others back? This is so typical of an uncouth nairaland male or probably an attention seeker.

luluosas:
Wow! This is a great piece of advice ahead of 2020.
But please, I have a request, and I don't know if you can help me. Thank you

Sure. Send me a mail,so long as money no dey involve. LOL!

DavidEsq:
Poverty nko?

Hahahaha....Omo u are right o... Na poverty be the primary cause. Every other factor is either directly or indirectly linked to poverty. Poverty na bastard las las.

I only assist ppl financially once. Ask me again and I tell u I don't hav. Adopt this approach and u see a big difference in ur dealings with ppl especially Nigerians. I hav com to realize dat Nigerians will continue to ask u for financial favour so long as u keep giving them. Learn how to say "NO" from today and see urself free from unnecessary troubles. I learnt it not too long ago and I bet u, it's one of the biggest lessons of my life.