₦airaland Forum

Yes he was not rich, but he could provide a little. But dont compare. I love to get to know you and maybe from our interactions i will be able to ascertain, if you practice what you preach. Cos as a professional in my field, i have handled more divorce/matrimonial matters than i can remember, and ofcourse as a civil doctor, your client will always tell you the honest truth. From my experience, with couples, when i see those who have clocked 10,15 20 and above in marriage, i duff my hat for em. The crux of the gist is that its easier said than done. Talk is cheap, but when reality sets in, lips gets sealed.
Disclaimer: The aforementioned is said with prejudice to you personal ego or image.

missbronze:
Dear, quarrels, nagging, insults are bound to happen in marriage. Don't blame it on because the "man have no money again."


You used Job's wife as example, didn't your bible show you that Mary married Joseph ordinary capenter. He was so poor, no money for hospital, she have to deliver in a manger.

Yet, there was love and peace in their marriage.

The truth is in marriage, when the man has a good/ high paying job, or biz is doing fine, the man is always respected cos he can provide family needs/finance amongst others. But when things goes south, the wife is a very caring and understanding woman, she will endure for a while and bear with the man hoping things will bounce back, the longer it takes for things to bounce back, the more she is tired of waiting. She gradually losses her patience, quarrel, abuse and insults sets in, if not verbally, body language says it all.
Shortly verbal insult follows suit, comparism becomes the other of the day. Soon the man is forced to act as a man, hits her, she involves the already angry kids( who are already angry at their dad, becos like he cant provide for them like their friends dad). Soon she turns the kids against the man. The man becomes lonely, frustration and desperation sets in. Lets end it here today.
@ missbronze, still in doubt, ask Job's wife what happened to the love she once shared with the husband job when his affliction got worse. I rise

missbronze:
I read all wrote here.

If you make all this money, and confidently get married. along the line you have misfortune, and lost all your money. What will happen? will you stop being the man of the house? the head of the house?


Oga, It takes more than money in marriage for your woman to respect you. Respect comes from how you carry your home, your values, your morals, etc.

Our prayer should be God give us a peaceful home with the right partner.

When I was 14/15,my dad sat me down as a son and said"my son, the sooner you realise the fact that you are a man, the easier life will be for u. One day, you will marry & raise a family. You will have the sole responsibility of providing for your family and giving them the best of what life has to offer. If you do this, your wife will love and cherish you, she will forget your name and still call you honey, darling, sugar pie, daddy, baby, etc, at age 60.But remember, you must strive to make things better cos if you fail, you become"Mr. Man, papa John, she remembers your full names and always ask ; y did I marry you, the juju u used for me has failed and you become a useless, good for nothing man, she starts comparing you with your mates, forgetting the good times so soon. If she is totally heartless, she starts sleeping around with your friends and other men who can take care of her needs. She denies you everything the marriage has to offer and you feel worthless before her as she will turn the kids against you.
So my son work twice as hard as your mates, work while they work and work while they sleep. Remember you have loads of time to rest and sleep when you are dead. Even if you die young, make sure you leave enough to make your family comfortable. For in doing all these, you earn their respect even in death. # Our Fathers advice #no woman loves penniless man. #No money no love. #No money no honey. #in a woman world, it's God first, make money and don't stop, cos the only language they Understand is money.

Dear OP, all you need do, is to get a very senior lawyer to write him an official letter attaching the old document as exhibit, under the guise that he is doing it pro-borno, even if you might actually end up paying. The fear of him or his lawyer going against a very senior lawyer will make him think twice. Because for him to get a senior lawyer in the rank of yours, will cost him much and since he knows he is at fault, he will rather not take that chance. I am talking from experience. At the end of the day, you will get your money or something substantial. But rem to send me my share ooo

I love your resilience and decision to update your self . That was what God used in blessing you.Your additional skills paved the way and gave you the edge. A lesson for others to learn from and be wise. Don't just sit down and lament , continuously update your self. Shalom.
Congrats @ op

I saw this on Facebook and really felt the need to share it. I have NEVER seen a more perfect poem, written in the saddest way.
"I destroy homes, tear families apart - take your children, and that's just the start.
I'm more costly than diamonds, more costly than gold - the sorrow I bring is a sight to behold.
And if you need me, remember I'm easily found.
I live all around you, in schools and in town.
I live with the rich, I live with the poor, I live down the street, and maybe next door.
My power is awesome - try me you'll see.
But if you do, you may never break free.
Just try me once and I might let you go, but try me twice, and I'll own your soul.
When I possess you, you'll steal and you'll lie.
You'll do what you have to just to get high.
The crimes you'll commit, for my narcotic charms, will be worth the pleasure you'll feel in your arms.
You'll lie to your mother; you'll steal from your dad.
When you see their tears, you should feel sad.
But you'll forget your morals and how you were raised.
I'll be your conscience, I'll teach you my ways.
I take kids from parents, and parents from kids, I turn people from God, and separate from friends.
I'll take everything from you, your looks and your pride, I'll be with you always, right by your side.
You'll give up everything - your family, your home, your friends, your money, then you'll be alone.
I'll take and I'll take, till you have nothing more to give.
When I'm finished with you you'll be lucky to live.
If you try me be warned this is no game.
If given the chance, I'll drive you insane.
I'll ravish your body, I'll control your mind.
I'll own you completely; your soul will be mine.
The nightmares I'll give you while lying in bed.
The voices you'll hear from inside your head.
The sweats, the shakes, the visions you'll see.
I want you to know, these are all gifts from me.
But then it's too late, and you'll know in your heart, that you are mine, and we shall not part.
You'll regret that you tried me, they always do.
But you came to me, not I to you.
You knew this would happen.
Many times you were told, but you challenged my power, and chose to be bold.
You could have said no, and just walked away.
If you could live that day over, now what would you say?
I'll be your master; you will be my slave.
I'll even go with you, when you go to your grave.
Now that you have met me, what will you do?
Will you try me or not?
Its all up to you.
I can bring you more misery than words can tell.
Come take my hand, let me lead you to hell."
Signed
DRUGS

I posit we get another group, E.g whatapp or bbm group werein we can do as you have postulated without hindrance in any form whatsoever. This thread is too public for such.

Toks2008:
LOL! Funny enough so many ladies and guys are finding their way in stylishly without wanting to formerly introduce themselves.

I have written before that inasmuch as we are all friends here,it is practically impossible for each one of us to develop close friendship with everyone hence the ned to introduce ourselves properly and showing us a pics of you because some guys here may just love your pics and love to know yo
u more as close friend and if we can't see you,then we can be sure if you are not a robbot...so please ladies and gents lets try to put up our pics for at least 10mins when we join this responsible thread...this is a faceless forum but this thread consists of faceful people if there is anything like that...so abeg show ya face biko nu...Good night friends.

You just gotta be happy. They say you don't find love, love finds you & whether you believe it or not, eros will surely fire her arrow of love to melt your stoney heart. Quite funny right? But you know, you not a believer, you ve never believed in it. But suddenly you are caught in the web. You meet someone and u care for her , can't stop thinking about her. You just take time to ask why me? Whats love got to do with this friendship?
Truth, you ain't got no answer. You is in love baby. You realise, you is a God damn grown ass man who gotta take some responsibility. Often wonder why they say" love is like a wave but different on every shore"? Some fill you up and others erodes you. You is just gonna use ya head and do some grown ass motherfucking thinking, you know.
Just some grown ass loud thoughts. #another night in Soweto.

Hey this is really true and see it will work for you too..

If U were born on the 1st, 10th, 19th, 28th of any month U r number 1….
If U were born on the 2nd, 11th, 20th, 29th of any month then U r number 2…
If U were born on the 3rd, 12th, 21st, 30th of any month then U r number 3…
If U were born on the 4th, 13th, 22nd, 31st of any month then U r number 4…
If U were born on the 5th, 14th, 23rd of any month then U r number 5…
If U were born on the 6th, 15th, 24th of any month then U r number 6…
If U were born on the 7th, 16th, 25th of any month then U r number 7…
If U were born on the 8th,17th,26th of any month then U r number 8…
If U were born on the 9th,18th,27th of any month then U r number 9

Number 1
You are smart, straight talking, funny, stubborn, hardworking, honest,Jealous on competing basis, kind hearted, angry, friendly, authorities, Famous person… always want to be and regarded as first on people position, they are often like to be independent, will never be under others, self confident people!
You are most likely to fall in love in the younger age, but will get marry when you mature! You are likely to have problems with people who have opposite views
And you are most likely to take revenge over your enemies in a long time basis. You are a spender, but you will have a good profession in the future.
If you are guy you will be very popular that everybody will have mental attraction and respect at you. You can go anywhere from the local shop to the heart of the parliament because you are positive and well talented in numerous issues!! But in your life you will always have some people who will work hard to bring you & your name down. This is undercover!! Coz of your smart behavior you will be hated by some people too…
Your family life is very cool, you will have a very nice partner & wonderful children… You are pioneer, independent & original…
Your best match is 4,6,8 good match is 3,5,7 !!!

Number 2
No matter what, you will be loved by every one coz your ruler is the moon and every one loves the Moon. Well.. You are a person who day dream a lot, you have very low-self confidence, you need back up for every move in your life, you are very much unpredictable. Means you do change according to time and circumstances, kind a selfish, have a very strong sense of musical, artistic talent, verbal communication.
Your attitudes are like the Moon, comes to gloom and fade away so everybody can expect changes in you. You can be a next Mahatma Gandhi who does peace love or you can be a Hitler who wants to destroy the man kind and peace (I mean in the community and your own home).
If you really have a deep thought about your own believe in God you can feel the difference which will make you stronger! Most of the time your words are a kind of would be happening true! So without any knowledge you can predict the situation. You will become poets, writers, any Artistic business people!
You are not strong in love, so you will be there and here till you get marry.. If U r a girl you will be a responsible woman in the whole family. If U r a man you will involve in fights & arguments in the family or Vice-versa. Means you will sacrifice your life for the goodness sake of Your family…You are gentle , intuitive with a broad vision, a power behind the scenes, well balanced People!!!
Your best match is 2 ,5 ,9 no other people can put up with you !!!

Number 3
You are a person of hard hearted, selfish most of the times, religious, loves to climb up in your life. You always tend to have lots of problems within your family in the early stages but you will put up with everything.. You have the strong word power, pretty happy face.. So wherever you go always you have got what you wanted!!! And from the birth always wanted to work hard in order to achieve something.. You will not get anything without hardwork! When you reach a man/ woman age you want other younger once to listen to you because you want younger people to respect people older than them. You do set so many examples to others.
Generally you are not a cool person. It’s not easy thing dealing with you. A tough player you are! But once you like someone’s attitude then here you go, what can I say? It will be a lasting friendship. You always have respect from others.
Your life seems to have lots of worries and problems but sure they won’t be long.. you will always have brilliant kids!!! You love the money a bit too much so temptation will push you to endless trying and trying.. If you are a guy then it’s over. Looking after your family and help friends, so you will spend a life time just being generous and kind (except 21st born men). And number 3s you will
be such an example of how to be in the culture & life!!! If you are girl then you have good character and culture & hardworking attitude. You always follow.
You are a freedom lover, creative, ambition focused, a person who brings beauty , hope & joy to this world!!!
Your best match 6 ,9. Good match 1 ,3 ,5 !!!

Number 4
You are very stubborn too, very hard working but unlucky in important matters in life, very cool, helpful, you have rough word power.. Might put lots of people away from you, you may cause nuisance to others if you are a man, and you often understands others and their problems well. If you are a girl you are very good with studies and arts. If you are a guy you spend most of the time after girl friends (almost) at times, you will have sort of too much fun life with mates & girls. Your friends will spend your time & money and get away with their life and you will become empty handed and don’t know what to do… So be careful!! You love to spend anyway!!!
Your good will is you are always there to help family and friends. Tell you what you people are little gem! s, specially the girls.. You always fall in love in younger age as well. You often live with disappointments, for an example you have got a degree in some thing… but you will be unemployed.. or will do very ordinary jobs.
But you will take care of your family very well…All you need to be careful of people who will take advantage of your kind heart. And beware of your relations too..
You are radical, patient, persistent,a bit old-fashioned, you live with foundation & order…
Your best Match 1, 8. Good match 5 ,6 , 7 !!!

Number 5
You are very popular within the community, you can get things done by just chatting..to even enemies! You have a pretty good business mind, you are often have no-idea what is today is like, or tomorrow is like, you are a person who does anything when your head thinks “lets do this”. You will be famous if you open up a business, get involve in share dealings, music etc.. Very popular with sense of humor ,you are the one your friends and families will always ask for help, and you are the one actually get money on credit and help your friends. You will have more than 1 relationship, but when u get settle down you will be a bit selfish anyway. Coz your other half will have a pretty good amount of control in you, be careful! You tend to go for other relationships! Contacts even you are married at times ‘coz your popularity..
You are someone who get along with anyone coz the number 5 is the middle number.. Changes & freedom lovers you are! You are an explorer with magic on your face. You learn your life through experience and it’s your best teacher!!!
Your best match 1 ,2 ,9. Good match 6 ,8 !!!

Number 6
Ooopppss..you are born to enjoy.. You don’t care about others. I mean you are always want to enjoy your life time, you are a person.. You will be very good in either education or work wise or business management! You are talented, kind (but with only people who you think are nice), very beautiful girls and guys, popular and more than lucky with anything in your lives. All the goodness does come with you. Your mind and body is just made perfect for love.
You are lovable by any other numbers. But if you are a number 6 man, you will experience kind of looks from most girls and will involve in more than few relationships until you get married. If you are girl, most of you will get marry/engaged early. You are a caring person towards your family & friends .
If you miss the half-way mark then you are about to suffer physically and mentally. Generally you will lead a very good inner-home happiness with nothing short of. You are a person of compassion, comfort & fairness, domestic responsibility, good judgment, and after all you can heal this world wounds to make peace for every life coz you have the great power of caring talent to make this world of love one step further…
Your best match 1, 6, 9. Good match 4, 5 !!!

Number 7
You have got the attraction to anyone out there, you are realistic, very confident, happy, such a talented individual with your education, music, arts, singing, and most importantly acting too. You have real problems with bad temper! If you are a girl, you are popular with the subjects listed above.
You give up things for your parents. I mean you value your family status a lot, you will be in the top rank when you reach a certain age. If you are a guy you are popular with girls, you are a very talented too. Most of the number 7s face lots of problems with their marriage life.
Only a very few are happy. You have everything in your life, but still always number 7s have some sort of unfullfilness, such worries all their lifetime.
It’s probably the Lord given you all sort of over the standard humans talents and you are about to suffer in family life. So you need to get ready looking for a partner rather than waiting. If you don’t, then you might end-up single. So take care with this issue, ok?
You are wonderful, friendly, artistic, happy person.. You are born to contribute lots to this world!!!
Your best match is 2. Good matches are 1,4 !!!

Number 8
You are a very strong personality, there’s no one out there will understand you. You are very good at pointing your finger at some thing and say “this is what”.
You are more likely to suffer from the early ages. I mean poverty. If your times are not good you might lose either of your parent and end up looking after your entire family. You often suffer all the way in life.
The problems will not allow you to study further, but you will learn the life in a very practical way. You are the one who will fight for justice and may die in the war too. You are normally very reserved with handful of friends and most of the time live life lonely and always prepared to help others.
Well. once you get married (which is often late) then your bad lucks will go away a bit and you! u become safe. You will face un-expected problems such as :
the error, government, poisonous animals, accidents.
You are some one with great discipline, persistence, courage, strength which will take you to success. You are a great part of a family team. You are a fighter!
Your Best match 1 ,4, 8. Good match 5 !!!

Number 9
Hey…you guys are the incompatibles people in the world. You are so strong, physically and mentally… You are often have big-aims. You will work hard and hard to get there. Normally you suffer in the early age from family problems and generally you will have fighting life.. But when you achieve what you have done, it’s always a big task you have done! You are so much respected in the community, you are a person who can make a challenge and successfully finish the matter off.
You are very naughty in your younger age, often beaten up by your parents and involve in fights and you seemed to have lots of injuries in your life time. But when u grow you become calm and macho type.
Love is not an easy matter for you. You are good in engineering or banking jobs coz people always trust you.
Your family life is very good, but will have worries over your children.
Your such qualities are humanitarian, patient, very wise & compassionate.
You are born to achieve targets and serve every one all equally without any prejudice.
You are totally a role model to anybody in the world for a great inspiration.
Your Best match 3, 5, 6, 9. Good match 2

englishmart:
one of those fallacies we've always been told. Why no spiritual private jets and wealth so I won't wake again when I sleep

You need spiritual private jet or wealth? Enter Benin city or Ishan land , were u will see someone confess and say they have mansions in their coven whereas even a church rat is richer than em in reality. Some tell you they are pilots whereas ordinary bicycle spoke them nor get for real life. Nor dull ur self oooo.

Wawawi:
Jowei jowei izon jowei! Izon jowie mi hausa yei gha!,yoruba yei gha! Ijaw wei ke bini nana. Odo izon otu. Izon kimi emi ... Emi ooooo

My bone man from another Mother. Kiedelyo !!! Izon otu ado.

Massive shout out to my Fishermen brothers from the creeks. Hiaaaaaaan Izon!!!!!! Iya.
Rep Burutu

...And he was right to be afraid, because the man who had cleared his throat soon raised his machete and struck him. Okonkwo looked away; so I did too. We heard Ikemefuna scream, "My father, they have killed me" as he ran towards Okonkwo. Then Okonkwo raise his own machete and bring it down on the boy.
Still rem quotes from your favourite " things fall apart.
Remember ; the white man's horse, agbala shrine and amalize " the cat"... Hehehehehehehe good old days indeed.

Good morning good people. Hope you is cool. Always remember, if you don't take the necessary step to actualize em, dreams will remain a mirage that messes with ya head.

They only lead evidence in 18LGA which means the other 13 were okay. If you are a lawyer you know what that means. Your postulation below is based on pemutataions and speculations, remember speculation has no place in law, for the court does not speculate or make conjunctures nor a father xmas to give that which has not been proven by cogent and credible evidence. Won't say more, a lawyer should understand what I mean.

adeaks:
Some people are blaming APC or wondering why they are going to appeal without considering this case from a rational point of view.

If the tribunal can cancel the elections held in 18 local govts our of 31 (more than half of the total number of local govt) because of voter disenfranchisement, meaning that voting did not take place or people were not allowed to vote, then they have no reason to countenance or uphold the elections held in the other 13 local govt.

If a supposedly non-partisan election umpire can declare results in 18 local govt without election properly taking place, then the results declared in the other local govts are also automatically tainted. Even if voting took place in those 13 local govts, what's to say the right results were announced? An INEC who messed up 18 local govts has no business being believed in the others.

The tribunal should have nullified the while election and ordered a fresh rerun in the whole state.

Brain teaser,let's rack and crack brain.Nor be only marriage talks jare.

Sometimes our light goes out and hope is gone but polly comes alone with a spark to rekindle the burnt out flame. To each and everyone who has hitherto helped rekindled our flame consciously or unconsciously, I say thank you.
Most especially the magician with an icky wings, but with the smiles that burneth like the flames from alkcu'vacial, I say I am indebted. She knows when u are down, under pressure and/or worried.
She knows when a smile eludes you, then she performs her magic and thus transforms an old weary day into a young eventful one. If you are an angel I will strive to make heaven by any means possible. But if you be a vallian I shall willingly and willfully eat the vallians pie. # grateful heart.

Sometimes our light goes out and hope is gone but polly comes alone with a spark to rekindle the burnt out flame. To each and everyone who has hitherto helped rekindled our flame consciously or unconsciously, I say thank you.
Most especially the magician with an icky wings, but with the smiles that burneth like the flames from alkcu'vacial, I say I am indebted. She knows when u are down, under pressure and/or worried.
She knows when a smile eludes you, then she performs her magic and thus transforms an old weary day into a young eventful one. If you are an angel I will strive to make heaven by angel means possible. But if you be a vallian I shall willingly and willfully eat the vallians pie. # grateful heart.

Good morning good people. Hope ya all had a nice night.

@ Hi55, there is a disconnect and though I will not entirely blame you, but you take a chunk of the blame. When ladies get married, they stop taking care of the little details that mattered when they were courting. They tend to forget those little stuffs as minute as they are were the stuffs that brought out the animalistic (sexual) in their man.
Take a pen and paper write out 50things you did either alone, together or he did alone. Such as wearing sexy, skimpy and seductive dresses when u guys are alone. Send the kids out on weekends or holidays and bring out the fire in him.
How is the sex? Boring? Do you initiate more adventurous ways to please him sexually, like MouthAction, sex in the living room, kitchen, bathroom, balcony for a private apartment etc. Do you guys go to movies together and you dress in a way to make him and other men give u a second look? Dress decently but sexy. Book a dinner on a casual evening and take him out, have someone baby sit your kids cos u ain't coming home that night cos u end up in an hotel room which is a different place from home. Change of environment has a way of impacting positively on your sexual lives.
Furthermore, is he the clubbing type, even if it is once in while and did you guys club when you were dating? If yes, once in a while suggest you go to a club and deal with him like you use to those days. Rock his world even more than you use to those good old days.
Lastly, how well do you know about his job, its your duty to make research on his professional career, so you can advice him when he going thru though times at work. Make adequate research so you can make useful suggestions, this to a large extent takes him off his friends and reduces the pressure on him. Make him see this from a second pespective, make him crave your input and suggestions in his professional life. Create this ideal of " no matter how difficult it is, once I discuss it with my wife we must have answers, and not once I discuss it with my friends"
Lastly go to God in prayer on insight and ideals to build a better home and please him. He might not be cheating on you, but there is lack of adequate communication. For if he ain't taking to you, either he is processing it alone or talking to someone else. You can contact me for more info. My details are on my pros topic. Have a nice day.

...When God had made Man, he made him out of stuff that sung all the time and glittered all over. Some angels got jealous and chopped him into millions of pieces, but still he glittered and hummed. So they beat him down to nothing but sparks but each little spark had a shine and a song. So they covered each one over with mud. And the lonesomeness in the sparks make them hunt for one another.
To she who has sparkened up my crazy world I say thank you. She knows her self.

Before this week, few people knew about what went on inside the brick walls of the Word of Life Christian Church in the village of Chadwicks, within the town of New Hartford, New York. But the recent beating to death of Lucas Leonard, a teenage church member, has begun to pull back the veil on the mysterious group, and details from law enforcement of the incident are consistent with what academics call “religious abuse” and possibly cult-like practices.

Police say that following Sunday Mass on October 11, six church members, including the 19-year-old’s parents Bruce and Deborah Leonard, beat him so he would confess his sins during a “counseling session.” The beating was so bad that family members eventually took Lucas to a hospital, where he died from blunt force trauma to his abdomen, back, thighs and genitals. Law enforcement later found that his brother, Christopher, also showed signs of assault. He too was hospitalized.

Deborah and Bruce Leonard face manslaughter charges and are each being held in lieu of $100,000 bail. A felony hearing was scheduled for Friday. Four more church members, including the boys’ half sister, face assault charges.

Mary Alice Crapo, author of the nonfiction book Twisted Scriptures: Breaking Free From Churches That Abuse, says the details of the Word of Life incident are “absolutely” consistent with those from accounts she has studied and indicate a fringe or cult-like abusive church. “In their minds, they’re thinking they’re helping him. And even though the parents cringe, they really don’t want to do it, they feel bad about it, they’re also pressured by that group.”

In the early 1990s, around the time when about 80 people at a religious compound occupied by the Branch Davidians near Waco, Texas, died during a standoff with law enforcement, experts in psychology, sociology and religion began writing about what they called religious or spiritual abuse. Cult-like churches are not always as overt as the Branch Davidians. Such abuse can happen anywhere—from small Bible-study groups to mega-churches, the experts say.

In 1991, the Spiritual Counterfeits Project published a 37-question checklist to help people discern if their churches or religious groups were abusive, with questions like: “Does your church interact with other churches?” “Does your church staff avoid secrecy?” “Are your children happy to attend church?”

“If you’re in that church, it’s so subtle,” says Crapo, who is the survivor of what she describes as a New Age cult. “People don’t understand their minds. They think, Oh, my mind’s strong, I’d never believe that.”

The New England Institute of Religious Research describes “aberrational Christian or Bible-based” groups as following “some [religious] principle of greater strictness, more single-minded dedication, or more intense renunciation of the world and its attractions.” Such groups often take scripture out of context, the institute says, separate members from the outside world and practice “spiritual elitism.”

In his 1992 book Churches That Abuse, Ronald Enroth identifies several characteristics of abusive churches, including controlling leaders who manipulate members and impose on them rigid lifestyles, and who make it difficult for members to leave. One victim told Enroth she felt leaving the church would “endanger her salvation, as well as the salvation of her outside friends and family.”

Religious abuse “is inflicted by persons who are accorded respect and honor in our society by virtue of their role as religious leaders,” Enroth wrote. “The perversion of power that we see in abusive churches disrupts and divides families, fosters an unhealthy dependence of members on the leadership, and creates, ultimately, spiritual confusion in the lives of victims.”

Little is known about the Irwin family, which reportedly ran Word of Life in Chadwicks. But its mysterious practices are consistent with accounts in Enroth’s book.

“I had never heard of [the church] before, and I’ve lived here in the area for 67 years,” says an employee at a church in New Hartford, who asked Newsweek not to name her or her church because she did not have permission to speak to the press.

“The parishioners at my church have always been puzzled by what kind of a church that is,” says Reverend Terry Sheldon of St. George’s Episcopal Church in Chadwicks. “People said nobody came in, nobody went out. So it was quite a mystery building.”

According to The New York Times, a prosecutor said Thursday the beating may not have involved the confession of sins, but rather may have occurred because Lucas planned to defect.

Difficulty leaving is a key aspect of abusive churches, experts say. Lois Gibson, an abusive church survivor who now runs support groups through her website Spiritual Abuse, says the mentality is, “You will be doomed if you leave. They’re not like a healthy church where if somebody decided to leave for whatever reason, they wouldn’t feel like they were leaving the ‘truth’ or leaving God or something bad was going to happen to them.”

Since she started her website in 1997, Gibson says she has heard from hundreds of people who said they were the victims of abusive churches across the United States and abroad, including Canada, Australia and England.

If the beatings did in fact involve confession, that too could be a sign of cult-like practices. “Confessions are really, really powerful in the mind to control people,” Crapo says. Gibson agrees, saying sometimes church leaders will later use confessed information against members in order to blackmail them.

The lengthy Word of Life beating, as police have described it, matches victims’ accounts from Enroth’s book. One victim told Enroth, “‘There was punching, hitting, children were whipped with belts, women were whipped with belts.’ This behavior was defined as ‘love’ for the victim, because, ‘if you really love someone, then you're going to pay the price for that person to be set free.’”

Another account from Enroth’s book said public confessions would last “anywhere from four to 20 hours. These sessions usually usually took place at night.… These intimate details, including those related to one's sexual behavior, were [later] brought up over and over again to produce feelings of deep guilt.”

Even the lawyer for Deborah Leonard, Devin Garramone, says the signs point to cultlike practices, of which he says his client was a victim. “In my meeting with my client, right away I had the distinct feeling that this woman had some sort of trauma about her. She was very meek and timid.” She was a member of the church for decades, Garramone says, “so that’s a long time to get indoctrinated.”

Garramone adds, “She’s very distraught and she breaks down and cries sometimes when I get into what went on. She’s reckoning with a lot and I think this may be the first time in a long time that she's been on her own away from the church and she’s dealing with a lot. Maybe she’s realizing for the first time how manipulated she had become.”

Donald Gerace, a lawyer for Bruce Leonard, paints a different picture of the church and its practices: “Everything I’ve learned about the church...has indicated that the church has regular Sunday services: It has Bible study; it has an outreach program to provide food to disadvantaged individuals; it has regular annual events.”

Referring to his client, Gerace adds, “What had occurred was as a result of a revelation to him by his son regarding some of his son’s past behavior, and it’s an unfortunate and tragic event affecting the lives of many people now.”

If she is your wife is what will you do??

...ships at a distance have every man's wish on board. For some they come in with the tide. For others they sail forever on the horizon, never out of sight, never landing until the Watcher turns his eyes away in resignation, sometimes our dreams are mocked to death by time.

... my love for linton is like a folliage in the woods, my love for heathcliff is my source of invisible delight but necessary. For time changes things , as winter changes trees. And men do rise and fall like winters wheat but good deeds they say will never die.
When we die, who tells our story? Those never really loved us but loved what we had to offer them? Or those who are with us for one thing or another but for no true reason did befriend us?
What will keep us alive even in death? Our riches of the world or our good deed of the minds eye?
Once again I ask, where are all the billionaires during Shakespeare's era?
Death like winter comest to all men, wealth fades fast like a willow tree in winter,but what will you be remembered for?

NgeneUkwenu:
Is the said suit challenging his screening and confirmation? While did the Senate Pass of confidence on Saraki, when the graft allegation against him are pending before the court?

I don't think you understand what he is trying to tell you, from the legal perspective, the subject matter of the suit which are the petition against his ministerial nomination and allegation of fraud are all les pendis before a competent court of law. And as such, parties are to maintain status quo ante bulem, in other not destroy the res (which is the subject matter of the suit) and there fore render the judicial decision of the court nugatory and of no effect. You can eat your cake and have it, for he who come to equity must come with clean hands and submit to its equitable jurisdiction. If you still don't understand, ask your self why is CRA in court , why does he hope to achieve and why did woke take steps he took and why hasn't he commenced prosecution. If you answer this, then u grab the nitigrity of what we are saying. Thanks

For you prayer solves every problem abi?/

Sparkles003:
Most ladies when dating a man fail to pay attention to the very little details.
while befriending eachother except you are one that stands for no sex you would have noticed his fetish for "licking"either by actions or subtle telling thru his words.
Now to the question of if i can allow my man do the "licking"or not.
yes i can as i feel is vice versa.there is no where that the bible condems how you make love.rather it says that the two shall become one which is only possibe in flesh,sometimes in soul and very rare in spirit.all she can do now is to pray the demon out of him

xtervaganza:
you're lucky to have a fantastic boss


Not everybody can say the same



May the God your boss serve bless him for being nice to you

Kindly help me edit your post you did quote and remove the personal detail. Thanks

@ siamia without prejudice to your personality,dont you think marriage is over rated? Dont know just asking. You could give me a lesson on it.

A former Governor of Rivers State, Mr. Rotimi Amaechi, has written three letters on why the Senate should not stop his screening as a ministerial nominee.

He said the allegations against him were not only false but also made malafide with the intent to “solely irritate, embarrass and tarnish his hard-earned reputation.”

He said he should be presumed innocent until the contrary is proved.

He said since there are pending cases at the Federal High Court, Abuja and the Court of Appeal, any action by the Senate will be subjudice.

He asked the Senate to preserve its Standing Order which bars it from dabbling in any matter pending before a court.

Amaechi broke his silence in three separate letters to the President of the Senate, Dr. Bukola Saraki,and Senate Committee on Ethics, Privileges and Public Petitions.

The letters were written by his solicitor, Edward E. Pepple.

In the letters, he asked the Senate to “discard” the petition against him by the Integrity Group and the report of the Justice G. G. Omereji Judicial Commission of Inquiry.

Citing the case of ex-Vice President Atiku Abubakar, Amaechi said the Supreme Court had emphasized that an indictment by the Judicial Commission of Inquiry or Administrative Panel is not an “indictment” or sufficient for the purpose of preventing a person from holding a public office.

The October 12 letter to Saraki (EW/GC/CRA/15/012) reads in part: “ It has informally come to our client’s attention that the Judicial Commission of Inquiry set up by the Governor of Rivers State, Chief/Barr. Nyesom Ezenwo Wike, to judicially investigate our client and probe into some transactions of the Rivers State Government undertaken during the tenure of our client has purportedly come up with a report based on which the Governor and Government of Rivers State have supposedly also issued a White Paper, wherein it has proposed that certain steps and actions should be taken against our client.

“Of course, this is clearly in defiance of the pending suit at the Court of Appeal on the issue.

“It is important to mention that our client only became aware of this situation through a news bulletin aired on both the Channels Television and the Independent African Television (AIT). Apart from those, no other form of communication has been sent to our client, whether directly or indirectly.

“As had been mentioned in our earlier letters, our client is challenging the competence and validity of the Judicial Commission of Inquiry and its powers to make any valid or binding decision or pronouncement as it relates to him. The matter is pending at the Court of Appeal, Port Harcourt Division, in suit No. CA/PH/342/2015; Between Rt. Hon. Chibuike Rotimi Amaechi (claimant/appellant) and the Governor of Rivers State; Attorney General of Rivers State; Judicial Commission of Inquiry and 7 others (defendants/ respondents).

“On the 14th of July 2015, our client caused to be issued an originating summons against the Governor of Rivers State, the Attorney General of Rivers State, the Judicial Commission of Inquiry and 7 others before the High Court of Rivers State, presided over by Hon. Justice S.C. Amadi in suit No. PHC/189/2015 between Rt. Hon. Chibuike Rotimi Amaechi vs. The Governor Of Rivers State & 9 Others, wherein he challenged the competence and powers of the Hon. Justice G.O. Omereji Judicial Commission of Inquiry to carryout judicial function of investigating him and making pronouncements thereof, instead of the authorities established by law to do so. However, Hon Justice S.C. Amadi on the 20th of August 2015 dismissed the suit on very spurious and unjustifiable grounds. This led to the appeal referred to above.

“Much as we do not intend to canvas our arguments at the Court of Appeal before the Distinguish Senate, it is pertinent to highlight some salient provisions of the law and pronouncements of the Supreme Court of Nigeria on this issue and the rationale for our client’s challenge of the competence of the Judicial Commission of Inquiry.

“ The Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria is the grundnorm upon which every other law derives. Therefore, any law that is inconsistent with the Constitution is to the extent of the inconsistency void. Section 6 of the Constitution establishes the judicial powers of a state, which is vested in the courts, being courts established for a state pursuant to the Constitution. Section 272 of the Constitution provides for the jurisdiction of the High Court of a state, in this case, Rivers State. See the provisions of sections 1, 6, 36, 251 and 272 of the Constitution on the above propositions of the law.

“On the other hand, the summary of the provisions sections 7 (b-f), 12, 13, 14, 17, 18 and 21 of the Commission of Inquiry Law (Cap 30), Laws of Rivers State 1999 is to the effect that the commission under that law has the power to summon, issue warrants of arrest, impose fines, commit for contempt and summarily convict and impose terms of imprisonment. This is contrary to the express provisions of the constitution. These are obviously powers exercisable by the courts.

“This position of the law has been upheld and reaffirmed severally by the Supreme Court of Nigeria. In the case of Doherty V. Balewa (1961-1962) NSCC (page 248) at 257, lines 35-50, the Supreme Court in a similar situation with the instant case held as follows:

“The power of the commission to impose imprisonment is clearly contrary to the provisions of Section 20, and this was not disputed by the Attorney-General. This must also apply to the power to impose a fine, which is enforceable by imprisonment. In these circumstances, we would hold that Sections 8, 15 and 18 are invalid to the extent that they purport to empower a commissioner to inflict a punishment of a fine or imprisonment that the Sections should be ‘read down’ accordingly.”

Earlier in an October 9 letter to Saraki and the Senate Committee on Ethics, Privileges and Public Petitions (EW/GC/CRA/15/011), Amaechi said the petition against him by Integrity Group was heinous.

He said: Sir, following the receipt of the letter for and on behalf of the Distinguished Senate (Committee on Ethics, Privileges and Public Petitions)which was graciously served on our client today (9th October, 2015) with a copy of the petition, accordingly inviting him to appear before the committee, we wish to furnish you and the committee with some further and better particulars, hence this letter.

“ We make bold to say that as grievous, heinous and worrisome as the contents of the petition may seem on the face value, it is as malicious, dubious and libelous as it is falsehood.

“As we had stated in our earlier letter, whereas our client is very desirous of defending himself of these allegations made against him, we are sincerely afraid that he is, in this case, constrained and unable to do so before the distinguished Senate at this moment. This is because the subject matter of the petition is subjudice, being issues pending and subsisting before courts of competent jurisdiction. The cases include:

Suit No: CA/PH/342/2015; Between Rt. Hon. Chibuike Rotimi Amaechi (claimant/ appellant) and the Governor of Rivers State; Attorney General of Rivers State; Judicial Commission of Inquiry and 7 others (defendants/respondents), pending at the Court of Appeal, Port Harcourt Division. (ANNEXURE 1)
Suit No: FCT/HC/CV/2677/15; between Advante Consulting & Mgt Co Ltd; Result Import Export Co Ltd; Capital Index Ltd (plaintiffs) and Livingstone Wechie (for and on behalf of the Integrity Group), The Sun Publishing Ltd, Leaders and Company Ltd and Guardian Newspapers Ltd (defendants), pending at the High Court of the Federal Capital Territory, Abuja. (ANNEXURE 2)

“Sir, at the Court of Appeal, our client is challenging the competence and validity of the Judicial Commission of Inquiry and its powers to make any valid or binding decision or pronouncement against him.

“The issues for determination before the Court of Appeal therefore relate and pertain to the ‘wrongful allegations of corruption and corrupt practices’ levelled against our clients and the unlawful and unconstitutional procedure adopted by his accusers and indicters (which in this case includes the Governor and Government of Rivers State, the Petitioner, Mr. Livingstone Wechie, and the Judicial Commission of Inquiry) in what may seem as an attempt at establishing the ‘purported wrongful doings’ against our client.

“On the 14th of July 2015, our client issued an originating summons against the Governor of Rivers State, the Attorney General of Rivers State, the Judicial Commission of Inquiry and 7 others before the High Court of Rivers State, presided over by Hon. Justice S.C. Amadi in suit No. PHC/189/2015 Between Tr. Hon. Chibuike Rotimi Amaechi vs. The Governor of Rivers State & 9 others, wherein he challenged the competence and powers of the Hon. Justice G.O. Omereji Judicial Commission of Inquiry to carry out judicial functions of investigating him and making pronouncements thereof. However, Hon Justice S.C. Amadi on the 20th of August 2015 dismissed the suit on very spurious and unjustifiable grounds. This led to the appeal referred to above.

“ In suit No. FCT/HC/CV/2677/15 that is before the High Court of the Federal Capital Territory, Abuja, the issues relate directly and specifically to the contents and subject of this petition. The petitioner, Mr. Livingstone Wechie, between 3rd and 4th August, 2015, using the title ‘Looting of Rivers State Treasury’ caused to be published the same contents of this petition in some national newspapers (Thisday, The Guardian, Daily Sun, The Nation, etc), wherein he published that our client and Messers Advante Consulting &Mgt Co Ltd; Result Import Export Co. Ltd; Capital Index Ltd were involved in corrupt practices.

“He did, as in this present petition, also allege that the said companies were fraudulent and not registered with the Corporate Affairs Commission (CAC). Aggrieved by the libelous publications, these juristic persons (the companies) approached the court to challenge the veracity of the contents and subject matter of this petition and to seek damages for libel against the petitioner for the falsehoods published and circulated against them and our client. Find attached the bundle of court processes; including Writ of Summons, Statement of Claim, Order for Substituted Service on Mr. Livingstone and other defendants, etc.

“Mr. President, this suit is still pending and subsisting at the High Court of the Federal Capital Territory, Abuja. The court in order to come to the conclusion that the contents of that publication are false and libelous, for which damages should be paid must make findings and resolve some issues, including for instance:

whether or not our client was involved in any form of corrupt practices as alleged, be it stealing, unlawful enrichment and laundering of public funds through the plaintiffs in suit No: FCT/HC/CV/2677/15
whether or not the companies (Plaintiffs in suit No: FCT/HC/CV/2677/15) are registered with CAC, fake or authentic;

iii. whether or not there are glaring cases of corruption, criminal breach of trust, unlawful enrichment and wanton conversion of funds as it relates to the transactions between the Rivers State Government under our client and the plaintiffs in suit No: FCT/HC/CV/2677/15.

whether or not our client approved the sale of the Gas Turbines to NG Power-HPS Limited, and if he did, whether it was for the said amount and whether the proceeds were diverted by our client
whether or not there was any transactions between the Rivers State Government under our client and the plaintiffs in suit No: FCT/HC/CV/2677/15, and if so, whether there was any corrupt practices in the said transactions.

“ Mr. President, we have no doubt that the Senate being an Arm of Government established under the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria verily appreciates the general principle of the rule of law, hence the invitation extended to our client to respond to the petition.

“Whereas we appreciate the commitment of the Senate to be fair and just, especially in offering our client an opportunity to state his side of the matter, however we need to state, and most regrettably too, that our client is unable to comment or respond in specific terms to the allegations contained in the said petition, as that would amount to commenting on the subject matter before the court of law.

“Sir, we are afraid that there is no way the distinguished Senate can effectively, successfully and conclusively investigate and determine the allegations in this petition without making findings, decisions and pronouncements, one way or another, on the issues listed below, which would be substantially the same issues that the court needs to resolve.

“Some of the issues that this Senate would have to resolve for instance will include:

whether or not our client was involved in any form of corrupt practices as alleged, be it stealing, unlawful enrichment and laundering of public funds through the Plaintiffs in suit No: FCT/HC/CV/2677/15;
whether or not the companies (plaintiffs in suit No: FCT/HC/CV/2677/15) are registered with CAC, fake or authentic;

iii. whether or not there are glaring cases of corruption, criminal breach of trust, unlawful enrichment and wanton conversion of funds as it relates to the transactions between the Rivers State Government under our client and the plaintiffs in suit No: FCT/HC/CV/2677/15;

whether or not our client approved the sale of the Gas Turbines NG Power-HPS Limited, and if he did, whether it was for the said amount and whether the proceeds were diverted by our client;
whether or not there was any transactions between the Rivers State Government under our client and the plaintiffs in suit No: FCT/HC/CV/2677/15, and if so, whether there was any corrupt practices in the said transactions; and several others.

“Just as the general principle of law is that commentaries and other forms or outside-the-courtroom discussions should not be encouraged or engaged in relation to the subject matter of any judicial litigation, so as not to prejudice and prejudge a matter before a court, we have also realized that this distinguished Senate has not only adopted this principle of law, but has also made it a written code in its Rules and Standing Orders, which is the compass for the proceedings of the Senate.

“The Senate by so doing has debarred distinguished Senators from considering matters which are rightly or wrongly subjudice for the sake of ensuring the much-desired separation of powers and preventing possible loopholes that may exist or be created in an attempt at short-circuiting the process of justice and circumventing the stringent application of the laws of our land.

“Mr. President, needless to emphasise that it is one of the cardinal pillars of fair hearing that an accused person is presumed innocent until the contrary is proved. Again, this position is strengthened and reinforced by section 36 of the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria, 1999 (as Amended) (hereafter simply referred as the Constitution).

“As our client has indicated, the allegations are not only false, they are also made mala fide with the intent to solely irritate, embarrass and tarnish the hard-earned reputation of our client and maliciously represent him as a person not fit and proper to occupy public office.

Sir, this intention is borne out clearly from the conduct and restless activities of the petitioner who has expressly stated in his petition to the Senate that he had written same petition to the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) and the Independent Corrupt Practices and other related offence Commission (ICPC), the two foremost institutions in the country vested with the authority to prosecute financial and corrupt practices related offences. Except to speculate that the petitioner has no confidence in both the EFCC and ICPC, one would have thought that the petitioner should have awaited the outcome of the investigation of his allegations by these institutions. He did not do so because he has one goal, one mission: to malign and discredit the person of our client before the Nigerian people.

“Mr. President, we wish to resist the temptation of delving into the subject matter so as not to fall foul of the law and prejudice the case before the court.

“ In the circumstances, we most respectfully urge the Senate to invoke its powers and the Rules and Standing Orders to protect our client from commenting on the subject matter of the petition and any issues relating to or arising from the judicial commission of injury and/or the purported White Paper issued thereto.”

Source:http://thenationonlineng.net/ministerial-screening-amaechi-fights-back/