₦airaland Forum

brocode:
Okay, first of all I know lots of people talk crap just to sound funny here. I get that, its good for the forum but this is a serious situation and am seeking real conversations and advice, possibly legal on this issue.

I am a young graduate working in Abuja after my service. It was tough but I rather be up to something than go stay with my folks back home. I work seven days a week and didnt have time much for dating any girl since I just started out at the labour market. I really wanted to get it right. I always give my best to everything I do. I graduated with flying colours and am used to been at the top of my game in every situation so thats why this is hard and I had to share.

Sometimes last year I was travelling out of Abuja to see some relatives and I met a girl on the bus. It was at least a 4-5 hours journey. She was sitting right next to me, so as not to make the journey boring we started a conversation. I could see immediately she likes me but I played it gently and kept it casual till our destination. Anyways, I value friendship particularly with a girl. I have been friends with some other girl since after secondary school and we still talk normally, nothing sexual. Just to paint a picture of my kind of person. Anyways I got her number, got a good peck and that was it.

She had said something about going to pay some visit but something told me she wasnt who she was painting herself as and that she was probably travelling out of town to get the D possibly for dough. I dont usually judge people so I made her comfortable even when I could see between her stories. I was full of energy and made her laugh a lot and she then even said she wants to travel to my part of the town to come see me but I didnt want her to as I only get a fews days out of town, I wanted to make the most of it with my relatives.

Long story short, I returned to Abuja and continued the hustles. She kept in touch on WhatsApp and with calls though. After much insistance I promised to let her come over when I came to town. Almost one months after I returned I still didnt find time and wasnt very keen on seeing her but I was still very nice and keep the conversations going on WhatsApp.

After a few weeks I had problems with my boss and had to quit my job because of unpaid salaries and the strain of the work. It was a very tough few weeks of my life. I didnt even have where to stay at some point but finally I was squarting with some guy. After a few days, he travelled out of town so I had the place to myself and doing nothing all day but sitting on my PC trying to build somethings or walk my way up to the next connect, I asked her to come over.

She did and spent the night. It was a way of getting my frustration of my unpaid salaries out of the way. As God would have it one of my hustles pulled through a few days after and I had to leave for Europe for further studies. I still kept in touch with this girl on WhatsApp just like other folks in my life. I wasnt expecting to travel so soon and had less than a week to prepare.

We exchanged a few messages everyday and it became less and less as the week goes by. But we still talk every now and then at least four out of seven day a week. We even exchanged pictures but while I send pictures I take like selfies she was sending me old pictures I have seen before on her phone. I asked her to take a picture of her she looked then and send to me. She did after much persuations. I noticed she was a bit plumpy and I asked her about it and she said she was fine and she was just eating a lot. I sensed she was pregnant, I asked her but she said no she wasnt. That was like five months after I left Nigeria. I was worried because I remember sometime in the morning while she was at my place, she was begging that since she didnt make me 'come' its wasnt fair as she cant even walk now and all and that I did a fantastic job and all... blah blah blah. I now had a run without condom after we had this weird conversation about the medical consequences but she brought out bitter kola and eat and said pregnancy wouldnt be it except something else. Long story short, I did it in the morning.

I was asking her about it for the next few days after I saw the pictures but she denied it saying we cant even be together so why would she keep my baby as am more of career guy and student now. I let matters lie. No need worrying myself so I thought. I need to focus on what brought me to Europe. I felt she was a bit hostile so I reduced the frequency of our conversations and also because I had switched my WhatsApp to a the foriegn number.

Then after a few weeks back I contacted her again on WhatsApp as I was on summer break and was trying to catch up with everybody back home. I was in a good mood so I joked with her that does she have a baby now. To my shock She said YES! and that she was sure it was my baby and she was sorry she hide it from me all this while but I dont have to worry about him as she was used to it now: surviving with the baby (or at least that what I think she meant). She asked weather I wanted to see a picture of this child. In my shocked I pleaded with her that that wasnt funny as am not ready to be a dad yet as I didnt want my child to go through what I had to go through and all. She got mad and said she knew I wasnt going to be with her and all and what kind of man doesnt even care about his family and all... so much blah blah blah.

Now I am nice guy. If I have a son, that means I have to step up to the responsiblity. I feel she is a very wicked person for doing this. I want my son to have the best up bringing. I could send all I have now to give him that but at the same time I dont know what to do. I dont what my son to grow up with her. My psychology and personality which my mum greatly help me build was what took me from a nobody to a fairly recognised person across the atlantic. I want my son to have that at least. And I know for sure she wouldnt give him that.

PLEASE ADVICE on what to do.
Thank You.

I doubt it's your baby, she wants to guilt trip you into sending Euros, do not fall for it

Dozzmani:
Hello friends

I have been a reader in this forum for a while now,usually see the help through advise being given to people,which made me to bring this issue here because at this point,I don't know what exactly to tell this my guy becuase this issue is beyond me.

My friend has been dating his girlfriend for two years now,the babe is know to us(his friends) and his family as the only woman for him. It was a no sex relationship as the girl said her virginity is her pride. My guy accepted to wait till when they get married as he truly love this babe. Last year ending, one guy moved into the compound of this girl, that was when stories entered their beautiful relationship.

To cut the long story short, recently my guy's girlfriend that never wanted sex started disturbing him of sex, he was surprised about it, later agreed as she made him promise her to indulge in it with her. Alarm blew on the supposed day they were meant to have the sex as he wanted to cover his white sheets because of possible blood stains, she told him blood won't come out. He went in and blood never came out. Since then, she had been lying and swearing she was a virgin which my guy persisted she was not.

She opened up to him of recent that she lost it to the new guy in their compound who as of then almost made them to break up but was pleaded with him not to break the relationship by her aunt and some good friends of hers'.

She doesn't have anything to do with that guy she lost it to because the issue went out of proportion then in their compound, which made my guy to start growing faith in her again upon knowing she slept with that guy in her compound few times when she cheated with him.

She recently confessed to him she knew blood won't come out as she slept with the compound guy once before the day they had sex. The twist now is that who he met a virgin could not hold on to it for him but gave it away to another guy.he is questioning the girl's love on how she could have done such.he still loves her but can't say if he can trust her not to try such if eventually he marries her.she begged for forgiveness.but to be honest,I don't know what to say to this guy.

Please, friends, your candid advise will go a long way in shaping someone's future here as of life partner as he plans on getting married by next year ending..

Why do you guys like being lied to?

luchy34:
A close friend of mine discussed this issue over the weekend. He said he needs an urgent advice so I decided to bring it up here. This is his story.
Michael (not real name). 28 years has been in a relationship with this girl for four years. According to him they are actually planning to get married next year. The girl in question resides in the states (united states) and she's working and also schooling there. But every year she spends her holidays down here in Nigeria, it was during one of her holidays that Michael met her. To cut a love story short they both fell in love, so much in love that the decided to take there relationship to the next level. Michael is a banker and he wants to settle down with this girl. According to him he has done a formal introduction to the girls parents and the agreed to accept him as their in-law. They have even fixed there wedding sometime next year after his fiancee graduation. Now he has a serious problem, during her last visit to Nigeria last month Michael noticed something different in her. He said that she suffers from chronic mood swings and sometimes extremely depressed. At first he wasn't bothered because he said that when they started dating initially he saw those traits in her but waved it off as her normal behaviour And he also said that it only happens to her whenever she's angry or the have a little bit of quarrel. But this her last visit revealed otherwise. This time according to him she gets a bit violent and needs a powerful subduing before she calms down. Then to his greatest shocker he noticed some pills she takes, when he went online to search what those pills are for he discovered it was for patients with Bi polar disorder...
Now my friend is really confused he doesn't know what to do. He truly loves this girl but he's afraid of her behaviour and since they're planning to get married there's no going back. What suitable advice can we give him because this is serious.

Mods abeg front page...

Question number one, did she inform him about this?

Tomjazzy2:
Having successfully concluded my one year compulsory service to the nation, I can categorically say here that, any girl/lady who doesn't cheat, or attempts to cheat on her partner/husband during her service year, will to a very large extent, remain loyal and faithful for the rest of her life; take it from me.

FACT

robedu:
thats not a good comment to make you know? that was not what i said

You just exposed your true profile dear

adewumiinioluwa:
good evening people I've been in the quandary of the course to pick as my first degree undergraduate course, as I cannot be admitted directly for law in the USA.......I'm wondering if you guyz might wanna help me out in evaluating which course is best as a first degree between Philosophy Psychology Political Science or Computer......thanks, I'll be so happy if u guys can help me out, really confused and stressed out

Computer science? They don't relate....

I suggest political science.... But na America, English sef go work for you

My brother, you see what we go through.....

mayorjosh:
Please this is not a blogging story


My brother actually came to me yesterday saying I should help him.I was actually confused and I thought I should be the one asking him for help.all of a sudden he burst into tears.it was then I knew had to have BoY talk


My bro is like a real normal bachelor.young,handsome,he's cool,got a cool ride,an apartment of his own,financially stable(not tryna hype him but just tryna explain what he is like so u can grab the story)


He's got this girl he has been dating since his final year.Trustme that girl is a hottie.she's so cute that most times I wished she was mine. But in the last 6 months she has been acting funny and I too have noticed



Their relationship is a very good one and I quite envy them esp when they kiss in front of me(that girls kiss sef ) .but since febuary to be precise she has changed ever since he forgot about valentine(due to the nature of his work; an mtn customer care attendant) but he made it up to her and she seemed happy.again he forgot about her birthday.but he also made up for it and the worth of the things he did to make up had pleased her(she had to be sef)


But on her Socials(fb,bbm,whatsapp,sc)its an entirely diff world.most times I begi ask whether she is a hoe.she uses other guys for her d.p like poo.she never updates a p.m/status about him instead its about other guys.in the last 3 years she has only used him as d.p once (since av had her pin).when I told him he thought I was just being jealous



Lemme spare u guys d reading,cutting d long story short she is a flirt and we don't even know if she's even had se x with other guys.he's confronted her like thrice now but she keeps denying it despite it being so obvious.the thing is that my mom,dad and sister were all against their relationship so I was the only one he could run to.I can feel his pain apart from that,he has actually invested a lot in her[b](the biggest one is that he got her a ride)[/b].he loves this girl and she loves him too but should they call it quits?...I relatively have no love-life experience fo I need ur help NLers


D funny thing is he gives her anything she asks for(I mean anything)me sef dey ask am for ordinary mtn #1500.it took him 1 week to answer me.he pampers her so iono what else to suggest him to do







What should he do?


THIS AINT A BLOG STORY ooo.tz real

I hope the car was bought in his name

Be a fool in love but don't be foolish because of love....

He should forget the babe, except he does not mind sharing

Darlingting:
i am writing this with heavy heart,broken heart,lonely mind and tears in my eyes.. its been 2weeks now and i hardly sleep nor eat. sleep is far away from me,my heart is heavy.i feel like committing suicide but again God wont be happy with me..just a period of two weeks im like a starved human being that havnt seen food for two years now..

This is my story,please i need the best advice i can get..
i met this girl in my final year and she was in 300l then,i asked her out and as time goes on we started dating, we have dated for two years now and the relationship has been like an average kind of relationship.. we have our good and bad times.. sometimes we fight,other time we settle.. before i started dating this girl who is in her mid 20s.. 24 to be precise.. before i started dating her, i carried out so many findings about her,stalked and monitor her to be sure she aint a cheat and without her knowing..she was really decent.. i find it hard to trust any lady but wit her i strted having second thoughts that all ladies aint same as people do say.. i find every way to make dis girl happy,even when i dont have enough i do stll support her.. i loved her to the extent that if 1000 naira is my last card i can give her 500 to keep up pending on when i get buzzes up.. all my friends knew her back in skul, i was kind of popular in school.. so through mr she was even known that they have to make make her MISS MASSCOMMUNICATION. in her department.. because i was an SUG official then.. so many people respected her cos of me,even guys that wanted to ask her out,saw her with me they back off.. she got respect even from lecturers and all..

After school things was moving cool.. i was settling her little bill to the extent i could afford.. she was loyal and caring also.. even her mum knows me..in the company im currently working.im working in the I.T department making some small cash waiting for when i will get a better job.just last five months the company needed some part time workers in the company for the post of assistant supervisor in the warehouse.. i decided to connect her.. she got the job which she meant to resumes by 8am and closes 3pm sometimes 2pm.. its like a shifting job..some days off some days on..

we dont work on the same site, her place of work is a different building..miles away from mine so we hardly sees eachother except when shes on break she come check on me or when im free i do go some times but she does most of the visiting.. i do call her if shes free so i can come meet her.
last 2weeks,i didnt hear from her for about 3 days and her pings aint delivering,so i decided to go visit her at the site.. only for me to discover she isnt around..i tried calling her the number wasnt reachable.i left.. on tuesday around 6pm we were asked to report our activites to the head of operation at the site,i went their,walked passed her table.thinking she has left work to school.. on my way back from were i went to drop my reports i saw someone dat looks like her walks into the Directors office.. my mind skipped a bit..i wasnt sure,i was curious so i chilled a little while.. and waited for the person to walk pass again.. after 5mins nobody passed.. this was around 6 geeting to 7pm.. i moved closer to the office, behold i heard her voice..i wasnt stll sure yet.. i had to move to look tru the door.. see my girl on my directors laps.. i was crazy.. i moved out..came back just to be sure behold she was d one.. i waited outside for her.. after like 40-50mins i saw her coming out form the site.. i hid myself and she and my director went into d car and drove off.. im weak and dead... my head rose high,.. dont kniw wat to do.. pls advice me.. im ill at the moment..infact i have switched my phone off and barred her line since then.. im still thinking on what to do..she has made and attempt to visit me in my office but i told the secretary to tell her anytime she comes that im not around.


NOTE : Im not posting this here to get pitied or get sorry from anyone,but i want everyone out their especially guys to know what they are going into before they venture into any of that shiit called "RELATIONSHIP" .
Dear guys please becareful,these girls are all same.. they pretend to good today,once they see the one that can offer more than you can do..you become an option to them..

First of all, no matter how much investigation you do; you can't catch them.... Secondly, as you concluded; all girls cheat so why are you surprised..... A boy becomes a man when he accepts that part of a woman

okhiai1:
HI guys i am in deep poo am a guy who is naturaly sacred of girls so thats why i did not date any girl till i was 19 so i went to my girlfriend place today and we where making out when during the bj section as I was so engrrosed engrossed in it closeing my eyes and enjoying the moment and by this time I was about to cum that was when my fucking babe decide to ride (alvin) and I pour my load inside her straight up.
I have given her postinor 2 but am still super scared and still team virgin so can she still get pregnant please guys mature answers

Wait, so you just inserted and came inside your girlfriend but you're still team virgin? Atlantic or airways?


PS: Postinor 2 works so stop being scared

Princejebs:
Hey guys,pls before I say anything, I need mature mind and Brain on this issue and not all these small folks that mess up around on every post.So let me not waist much of your time.There is this gal I hook up with last too month when I came back from school and the way I was looking at her I saw green light in her an I pass lol I chuk my head(sharp guy), although there's a time I wanted to date her but she refuse so I just let her go because she told me that guys are not trustworthy, broke his heart an never wanted love aqain.When I came back from skul,we both agreed an started dating an things are moving fine because I love really love her an she love me too but d problem is when ever we have a conversation in phone,she will be like somebody who want s*x because sometime she do tell me that she is not happy when ever she come to my side and I ask her why an she told me that anytime we rom*ance I always control her,I don't allow her to handle me .So I give her the chance an just last week I gave her the time an she did all she want,so when I wanted to enter the for*stry she remove my hand from there though she loves touching through p*nt and after some minutes I told her I want to use cond*m,hearing the word she stood up and started looking at me an after like 1 minute she told me she is a virgin and she is sad about been virgin and after that she was just looking at me for some minute and I ask her what happen but she refuse to tell me anything although I know she is angry cos I tourch everything.I want her cos am also a virgin an I really wana do that an am sure she also want it just that she is a virgin.....ladies and gentle men..can somebody advice me I love her so much am 21 and she is 20

https://www.nairaland.com/2572346/she-lied-me-virginity

For reference

xertyy:
I work in a technology firm where my colleague happens to be a female.. She's in her mid 20s, not too pretty but okay and goodlooking. Among all other staffs we both happens to be closer a bit that sometimes in our spare times we talk generally on relationships, love, heartbreak and all that..

Before those discussions kick starts something like a topic or an action relating to it has to take place.. So for the past one year + I have been working their with her, she's always telling me how Faithful and loyal she is to her boyfriend which happens to reside and work in other state within the south western part..

They talk on phone everyday at work and to some extent I do believe that these two are really in love and matured, even the fact she working, she told me her boyfriend even sends her allowance monthly..

And according to her they have been dating for 2 years+ and for the past 4-5 months they haven't seen.. This same lady got some toasters that do disturb her on phone and all that, in which lash them with harsh words and rejects them, her action in all makes me starts having a second thought of being faithful or even sticking with one girl.. I had a crush on her then,but due to this their lovey lovey lifestyle with the boyfriend, I decide to back off and keep my crush to myself instead of being rejected and all that..

Recently,earlier this week, our HRM sent for her,so she forgot her phone with me, usually she don't allow me to handle her phone,which was becoming obvious she's hiding something, not until she deletes or hides a particular chat or what then she can give me her phone to see her pictures.. So on this fateful day! On Tuesday to be precise, she forgot her phone with me,so I decided to go through her pics, fortunately I found one of my pics she took me with her phone,I decide to send the pics to mine phone via whatsapp, as I was about to do that, I discovered our MDs chats with her that she ended with "Love You Too" my curiosity increases which I opened to read..

What I saw was beyond my imagination, I didn't still believe what I saw.. From the whole conversation I can deduce that they have been sexing eachother and all that.. Early in the morning,she goes to the MDs office for quickie and all that.. I was shirt of words if this is really her or who.. Till this moment it seems I'm dreaming cos I never believed this girl can ever cheat on her guy.. I'm scared of Ladies! I'm scared of commitment, I'm scared of relationship! Right now I can't even put my trust on any lady! Ladies of these days are Something Else for Real!

There is a possibility I know this company, meaning I might also know you

When a girl tells me she's a virgin, I say good bye.... Because I can't stand liars

Aisha95:
My life force is gradually fading away. . .
Each moment, am alone, sitted in the confines of my room, I experience a sudden surge of suicidal rush. I have fought hard to defeat this feeling but its effect in me is overwhelming.
To me; life is meaningless. It's no longer worth living.
I don't know what else to do with my life.

From your username, I guess you're 20 years old.... I can not say you're too young to commit suicide but I feel you have your best years ahead of you to allow today's troubles to stress you this much...... I dunno the root of this thoughts but if it's school; then your story is not as bad as mine.... If it is relationship, still not as bad as mine.... But I overcame! I have not reached the top yet but when I remember those days when everything was working against me and I look at today, all I can say is that God did it for me and it was worth staying alive and weathering the storm....

Killing oneself should never be an option. You have too many things to achieve. Write a list of things you wanna do and work towards them

Now the kidnappers are in power, we don't hear noise about the girls anymore

Stewee:
Thank you for preaching the "Home work" story here!
Unfortunately most people who travel here are first time travelers and make more mistakes. Doing a quick online search about the city your gonna arrive to cannot be overemphasized, knowing how to move around, finding stores for immediate needs, making reservations and even where your church is located can all be super important. I remember when I arrived here,it was my first time in the U.S. But not my first time abroad... Settling down in Daytona beach wasn't so overwhelming because I had done some homework about how to solve my immediate needs...before I found my friend in the same school I had already settled in a hotel and had a 5hour sleep.

Daytona Beach, nice city.... Good Naija community (minus the rumors)....

@topic of accommodation,

I won't even bother looking for the genesis of the topic but will just throw this advice; before leaving Nigeria, research your options. Your first option should always be relatives, then school organized accommodation..... Thirdly look for available friends before approaching strangers....

Nigerians in America can be cruel, I have had relations desert me.... I have had strangers accommodate me

I have accommodated strangers and will continue to do so (But this is only for a short time).... But I always say not everyone is like me....

I really feel this issue should have been handled by both parties involved privately. (But IMHO, but of you were wrong)

godG:
To those in need of temporary accommodation, you should consider talking to them at the International Students' Office. When I got to Madison, I got an American family to accommodate me for free through the ISO. They gave me a bike, winter clothes, fed me, took me to get basic things, drove me round the city of Madison, etc. They get worried whenever I didn't eat their food.

Simply put, before leaving Nigeria, try to explore every temporary accommodation opportunities through your ISO. What I have noticed is that many of us don't read through the website of the school we intend going well enough. Right now, many of my friends here are even amazed I got such a deal. The difference: I did my homework from Nigeria.

Remember, whatever you are passing through isn't permanent. It shall pass. Nothing is permanent in this world; bliss, pain, triumph, etc. None is forever. Peace.

Well said! It's surprising how people rely on others for their research nowadays

Jeromejnr:
True.
But what I was tryna point out is, Iphon6=social media. And you will agree with me that the social media has done a lot of damage to relationships in our time.
The ancestors didn't have to contend with the social media.
But I still get your point tho.

Social media spoiling the fun in living

Seandexter:
This story has gone on for too long and it has taken its toll on me. I have been on and off with this girl for a while now. Nothing official though. I am based in jand and she in naija (uni lag). We met in naija and exchanged details. She came to jand on hols and we hooked up. I made the mistake of coming on too strong for sex early on and which apparently turned her off and we argued a lot on this. But this babe still dey come see me and i dey take her out and spent on her but we just kissed couple of times despite me wanting more. When she left i actually had a breakdown. It felt like her rejecting my sexual advances was like me getting slapped mentally. I eventually moved on and dated after that which she was aware of. She tried to come around when i was naija again but didn't let her as i was dating.

Me and my GF broke up and suddenly i am thinking of her again (to be fair i never really stopped). We reconnected and started talking again. She claims she likes me but cannot jump into anything due to me knowing some of her family members and our fight history. But she still comes around a lot n we talked nearly everyday. we make out, fingered her once but she won't let me go further. She still managed to bill me while doing all this. Now i am back in jand and i have let her know she is just taking advantage of my feelings for her. We aint talking right now. I still feel that she has the edge on me or something. I feel down on it which is why i keep going back i guess. The question is how do i break this hold? I know have sex right?? but i think she also knows this and is playing her cards right.

Also the chick says she likes me a lot but think she is just playing me cos why would u like a guy and not have sex with him after all this while. She is not a virgin and she is probably sexual active. I don't know why but for some reason i feel cheated. Everyone is telling me to move on now that this is taken too much out of me. Everytime you and this babe have anything u end up feeling bad. I am just confused cos moving on means losing and no way to recoup the investment made. I know i sound cheap or rude but i am just saying it now as i feel.

UNILAG, just forget her.... You're just a number in her list of boyfriends.... Maybe saved on her phone as Sean Jand

Better forget your investments, I have forgotten mine tey tey

namebdis4:
Please I want to apply for undergraduate admission in USA. I hereby need your help and advice may be you can help me with good university that pay low tuition fees and does not require IELTS or TOEFL or ACT etc. Please the whole house I need your advice and help.Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I will soon open business to do the work for all of you, simple research you want them to do for you....

jenns:
thanks bro..
my new i20 (summer 2015) has a different sevis number from the old i20 ( spring 2015) ., Hope that wouldnt be a problem at the POE ?
cc slimmy
cc kpoli
cc Kenny
cc kpoli
cc zezah & al d guru's

Wow, I am just seeing this (because you left out an "l", but following your posts you're already in USA (talkless of getting the visa).... All the best!

Gurgle:
If she had taken in successfully, this topic wouldn't even exist on Nairaland. Not expecting maybe, but hoping. Which sometimes is all anybody can do.

No, it would have delayed this topic.... It would have been how her menopause suddenly started in her mid 30s then they go to the doctor who reveals that she is way beyond 30....

Sigh!!!! That was very selfish of her, now brings of the question of if she lied because she loves you or to get you to marry her...

Honestly, do whatever your heart tells you to do.... Remember it's easier for people to tell you to forgive than to actually forgive....

But this lie is something else, was she expecting to get away with it?

The Nigerian rich man takes after the American rich man; they're the ones who spoil their kids rotten...

MrAnonTAC:
He should remember two wrongs dont make a right. Before taking any step to divorce her, let him finda week to gift her her favorite things and be at peace with her. once he is sure she seems happy, he should talk to her about what has been happening and seek for her opinion as to what to do to make things better. It might just be something little he needs to work on ...something as little as bad bed action.

Abeg what kinda advice is this?

Dapo777:
I feel windows 8.1 isn't prone to virus. Or if it is, I am thinkinof downloading bit defender or avast , suggest.

Windows 8.1 already comes with an anti-virus but installing another one won't hurt

Godswillnwaoma:
Hello nairaland especially the bodybuilders pls give me some ideas and exercise that will help me build muscles. I,m 6ft tall and handsome but i,m slim which i dont like at all.note, before you guys start bashing, i, m not looking for muscles to atract girl but i want it so that it make me look good and healthy.

Eat more protein and turn this into muscles by going to the gym and lifting weights....

PS: This isn't romantic

Is the groom meant to attend the bridal shower too?

greatiyk4u:
My friendship of about 20yrz is about going sour due 2 a situation dats almost beyond our control.......it all started last sunday n d situation has been giving me sleepless night as my friend is alleging dat I am not a friend IN NEED.

Dis guy in question has been my best friend 4rm primary tru secondary 2 higher institution n even till date n surprisingly we av never disagreed on any issue talk more of quarreling.......a reason many pple call us "oyi chi"....meaning "divine friendship"

We attended diff uni.....also different course of study....my guy has been lucky 2 secure a job wt oil servicing firm in Warri immediately after NYSC wt gud pay...........2 be sincere he has been massively providing most of my basic needs all dez while making me knw less d magnitude of frustration associated wt unemployment....

Straight 2 d point d guy has been married 4 5yrz now...a marriage he got in2 wen he was still an undergraduate cos he is d only son of his parents........so far d wife has never had miscarriage talk more of giving birth n d guy being a religious type had always left everytin 2 God until d pressure 4rm both his parents n in-laws became unbearable...

Wen he consulted me on d way 4wrd I advised him 2 go 4 fertility test wt his wife in a reputable hospital wch he obliged 2......d result 4rm Unizik teaching hospital testified dat my guy is impotent wt slight hope of impregnanting a woman........I av tried 2 form religious by telling my guy dat dia is nothing God cannot do n dat God's delay is not denial bt he has turned a deaf ear 2 my advice......

D problem is dat my guy n his wife invited me 2 dia house last sunday n after offering me presidential entertainment d wife told me dat after due consultation wt her husband dey re painfully begging me 2 sleep wt d irresistibly CHARMING wife 2 give him children......

Wen I told d woman 2 stop dat expensive joke my guy told me dat if I don't come 2 his aids he is gonna lose his wife cos d pressure 4rm her parents especially d mother who wasn't much happy wt d union was already unbearable.........he concluded by saying dat dis is d time 2 knw if am a friend indeed

My conscience has not actually accepted d plea bt @ d same time I can't sit n watch my main guy life turning miserable and am afraid of d aftermath of d action

Plz I need urgent advice cos am on a hot seat right now.

Best you can do is donate sperm but do not stick your thing into her

Yes it is, it's called indecent exposure

nasha1:
I want to talk about my experience and believe that many will learn.I started learning hand work(hair) when i was in university just to fall on something whenever i graduate and couldn't find a job and my parents were very supportive.After i graduated i opened a saloon with the help of my elder brother abroad and i am doing very well for a 25 years old. I started dating a guy that has been my friend for years and I was really happy I had him, though he wasn't rich nor didn't have any job but I believed he still has a future. Things went well for years and I help him also from the little I make, sometimes I even ignore my family needs just to make him happy and he promised that as soon as things gets better he will go and see my parents.I rejected many rich men who were married men anyway,even very promising suitors because of him,i never cheated on him,there were nothing i needed from a man that i didn't have.I wasn't rich but i had what i wanted in life and paid my bills.
On different occasions, I have given him some huge amount of money to start up something, even the kind of amount that I never dreamt that I could get when I was going for training years back.
He used some of it to fix his car, the remaining to do what God knows best and tell me afterwards that he has to fix his car because he cannot enter a bike (okada) because people will think that he is deadly broke meanwhile he is really broke which I never complained about, while I don't even have wheelbarrow to boast of.

After 4 years of courtship,he finally got a job then trouble started.He will sometimes ignore my calls then limiting his visit to my shop.I asked him many times what was the problem,he said it was nothing just job hectic.But after a year,he told me that he wants to settle down and that his family want him to marry a family friend blabla.i cried and went to his house to talk to his mother because they know me,she said she was not aware of anything and she will talk to him but the cousin told me that she doesn't know,it is the uncle that want him to marry the girl because he is doing business with her dad.she is 24 years old and lived in USA.i begged to the extent of falling sick.
he called me after 3 months just two weeks to his traditional wedding that he want to settle me for all i have done for him,that he loves me but the pressure is much.I abused him and left him in the hands of GOD.I am not hungry,the same money that took care of him and sometimes his mother for 4 years will take care of me.

I want to warn the ladies that they should Forget yam wey dey fire oh. Go for yam wey don done. Poor men will cheat when money comes in such a way that they will make up for their years of lack.
STOP following broke man with bright future. which future is bright when you dont have money. that is what we women have been using to deceive ourselves.
Pls stop giving him money. Dont give a man ur money. Its supposed to be the other way round
now i believe what my aunt has been saying that a woman that gives a man money is an unhappy woman.
Imagine if he's the one giving u money to expand... Won't u be happy? My dear wisen up, brace ur ego and keep ur head high. No man is worth all these. Broke men are always humble. Wait for him to be financially stable so that his true colours will show before you settle down with him.

Thanks.
cc farano,ishilove

Sorry dear for all that happened to you but sorry I have to blame you. You had a lazy boyfriend that was happy to collect money from you without even using it for its supposed use. Those are the kind of men that will dump you when the grass is greener... See how he is eager to jump ship because of green card, that kinda guy never loved any of you... Just looks for what he can get from you.... You should have seen the signs and walked away since

Not all poor men with potential are demons.... But some are!!!