₦airaland Forum

Nothing has changed cos my expectations were never out of touch with reality to begin with.

EgunMogaji2:
From my point of view, the relationship is doomed and now just a waste of time. Without any judgement on morality it’s just best to move on.

That being said I did have a coworker many years ago in the USA whose wife was impregnated during an extra marital affair. They stayed together, he fought the other guy in court and won adoption of the baby.

So never say never.

that was a marriage in a western world, this is a casual bf/gf relationship in a third world country. Plus it was the man that was willing to fight for his marriage and willing to adopt the baby. Two different things.

AreaFada2:
So my dear na so we go just dey? We have just accepted that nothing will work?

Wait o, why are our refineries not working? Or why have we not built a new one so we can stop import fuel?

I guess for same reason. Corruption of subsidy money.

It's terrible situation.
Just sad that a beautiful and blessed country like Nigeria cannot get its acts together. The whole world is watching with dismay.

my brother, what would you have me do? Who dey cry dey see road o,but what do we do?

Fela said "if you die,you go die for nothing" because he saw it all.

There are too many saboteurs in the system,they don't mind setting the country ablaze just to fill their pockets ,the rot is too deep that even the people save for a few have become part of the rot.The fish started rotting at the head but that rot has spread to the body, go to government agencies,go to private sector ,go to the markets its all there. The rot stares at you in the face.

So all i can do is ask ,"brethren,what shall we do?".

AreaFada2:
Shebi dem say there is no subsidy that GEJ was fibbing? Is APC govt paying subsidy? On cray fish, bread on petrol?

If they want to start paying stipend, expect around 5 million people to come from Chad, Niger and other countries through wide open Northern borders into Nigeria. After govt officials chop their share, it will be billions of dollars spent on it yearly. With very few genuine Southern Nigerian jobless youth getting anything.

First ,they will give the project /contract to their party loyalist,family member or friend to execute as a way to share the national cake ,the said person will budget billions, give to 10 real jobless people then 200 of their friend's children and relatives who are likely studying or working abroad. The rest money will go to voice mail.

These bunch of dunderheads who have no brilliant ideas in their corrupt brains. Mteeeeeeeew

Butterscotch92:
I know I deserve all the bashing I'm receiving here and more. But I wonder why it's very difficult for most to believe that I'm actually repentant about the whole thing. I know I really hurt my man which is part of my pain. I can never repeat such action no matter the circumstances with what I've learnt and I believe if I am lucky enough to get a second chance I'll be a much better version of myself and be forever grateful. It happened in the car because I wouldn't have agreed to follow him elsewhere by then it would be premeditated. I rejected every of his attempt to meet him anywhere else. Those were moments of weakness although it cannot be justified.

You sef, it wasnt a mistake ,you slept with him more than once na, it means you liked the thrill and fun that goes with sex in the car.

Anyway,as a woman if you ever get caught cheating, if you are not married to him, leave that relationship for your own good, I call it self preservation. You see these men they are a classic case of "you cant take what you dish". A man can cheat on a woman several times and she will miraculously find a way to let it go and forgive, but you see men, they are not biologically built to be forgiving to cheating. A man cheating on you will likely even be more angry to find you cheating too ,you know why? They hate competition.

Now you are remorseful ,yes but are you willing to be used as a "go to girlfriend"? I must say that guy is an honest guy for even telling you he cant have a relationship with you,if it is some of this demented psychopaths they will continue wasting your time while they search for another ,some will even marry secretly and keep wasting your time. You loose some you win some move on for your own good.

You keep talking about helping him heal,do you know you need healing too? Your guilt can consume you if you dont forgive yourself ,it can even lower your self esteem and make you "over compensate" to the next guy you get in a relationship with which could be a very bad thing if there are red flags to be noticed ,this over compensation can make you blind to it. You should be more concerned about healing from your guilt else it will damage your self worth and turn you into a "man pleaser" in your subsequent relationships.

He said the has forgiven you, but the question now is my sister "have you forgiven yourself?".How long will you let this guilt consume you? How long will you beat yourself up for it? Na prick you fuk, you nor kill person,dont go and ruin your mental health for it. Even the chronic womanizers are the most jealous of them all. You better get yourself together,see it as water user the bridge and forge ahead and stop this pity party.

NwsBoy:
You are a very backward minded human being..

If you have been reported on several occasions, at least your brain should have told you that no one wants to watch sex video....but still you will create another NL account to post sex video..


Pls what is your goal..?

His goal is to fish for your account details. The links is just a smoke screen,it will lead you to a fishing site. That is how people get their saved passwords on their phone stolen.

They will go to another village and continue breeding cos no one knows their history there. This bannishing only makes it worse,prison would have been a better place for the old idiot and rehab for the stupid girl

10 years for killing 15 people,smh

wahles:
We are loud

very loud,it can be very annoying. The second picture proves just how loud we can be,the guy next to him is a contrast.

I hate it when parents send their kids to live with relatives. If you are dead its understandable not when you are alive you push your parental responsibility to another. Like he said,no matter how well you are treated you never feel you belong living with a relative .

I cant even raise a relative's child cos they will never see it as anything,there is always this void you can't fill, punishment is misinterpreted as maltreatment you will hear something like "oh its because they are not my parents", no matter how hard you try to integrate them into your family ,they will never accord you that "parent" love.once their parent comes into the picture in their adult stage,everything you did for them will be erased

IMAliyu:
The Northern Muslims are not Muslims, but fakes by Boko haram standards.
And they don't believe in Nigeria, they want to create their own country ruled by their own interpretations of sharia.

oh i see, they should divide the country na so the northerners can have their full Saudi arabia styled country. So long as they dont disturb other regions with their madness .

“We are saying to the soldiers of Nigeria, we will never spare those fighting people practicing the religion of Allah. Because of that we shall attack your barracks, wallahi we shall block you on your roads. The story is, what you hear is not what you see; what lies ahead is tougher and uglier than this, Allahu Akbar,” he said.

Who is holding the northerners from practicing their religion? They have sharia or is there something i am missing?

Martinez39:
I have been celibate all my life. I don't intend to get married or have children or form any short- or long-term romantic relationship till I die. I will just enjoyingly ride through my only shot at existence.

lol,i thought you denied what i called you the other time. Anyway your choice old man its good you dont corrupt the earth with your seed unlike the other one breeding bastards everywhere.lol

Toks2008:
Sometimes I wonder how so many people have subjected themselves to perpetual bondage all in the name of worrying their heads over what people will say...People that won't remember you after 24hours if you die this moment.

You want to look a certain way, dress in a certain way, go to certain places, do certain things and you just can't because you worry about how people will react to it...I PITY YOU.

Asides the fact that you have just confined yourself into serious avoidable bondage in this one life you have, you will also suffer from a terrible psychological sickness called suppressed expression syndrome which can make you look far older than your age and can lead to full-blown depression.

As long as what you do makes you happy and does not anger GOD, please go ahead. Anyone that has issues with what another person does to make him or herself happy is either satanic or is definitely suffering from self-imposed bitterness.

I hope this liberates someone out there.

lol ,liberates someone to become impulsive and rebellious,its a good thing to do what one wants but you cant force others to change their opinion if you look like a typical brothel resident be ready to be tagged so.If you can marry such a lady, good for you ,but i am sure she will not make a good duchess else where in civilised country tho.

Some parts of the world ,going completely nak3d is legal and normal ,why not advice them to do it too ,since they want to be liberated ,lol

Wow mr psychologist @bolded , i didn't know not being able to look like a dreg and a rebel could lead to depression ,tell us more about this theory of yours ,i am very interested.

Toks2008:
[img]https://media1./images/bfb10ae2ef6b745b0a933ecf56cc8ff4/tenor.gif?itemid=5875398[/img]

Chai! This one nah old fashioned woman.

where i live ,the only people who i have seen with nose piercings and leg chains and double piercings are prostitutes,female cultists ,dregs and extreme rebels its not a culture here to wear those things but an identify for prostitutes to identify themselves. I am sure the duchess and dukes look a certain way for a reason.


Old fashioned maybe ,but i am smart enough not to draw bad attention to myself and become a target of stereotype simply because i want to be seen as a non conformist.

And like i said, this is a marriage,If you dont like tattoos don't marry someone with tattoos and force them to clean it.The lady has a right to pierce her body all over ,but the op has a right to like what he likes. The question he should be asking himself is if he can handle her impulsive nature. A person who is not a teenager and still does impulsive things like that at her age is a ticking time bomb.

Toks2008:
Don't twist words Aunty 15th century.. I used that word to appeal your Judgemental mindset... as you read clearly,..even Wall street that is comprised of first class World CEOs LOVE his nose ring but it is old fashioned people like you that will see it as a weired hence my use of that sarcasm.

Talk true, don't you secretly find guys with earrings attractive?

nah, sorry i dont ,i see such guys as either Bleep boy,yahoo, wire wire or if na yankee returnee, na those factory workers wey when them wan return go take weeks off to looks fresh .

which is why the op needs to leave her so people like you who see nothing wrong in it can marry her. Atleast let her go and look for her 22nd century man that will marry her, a man like you. Atleast he reserves the right not to marry a woman with piercings ,lol

Toks2008:
Let me help your ranting ministry.
Asides from very successful bankers that wet earrings, here is even a weirder one...the famous Twitter CEO...the same Twitter you are I know does not wear a simple one ear earring but A NOSE RING.

Now you see that you are either a bush woman, old fashioned or you just want to live in the past so remain there.

I love the look of earring on the left ear but because I don't want to pierce my ear I got a clipped one that I use occasionally and I love the look whenever I wear it.

Only shallow minded people judge other people cos they put on what they feel comfy with.

You used a word i like ,the bolded, you just stereotyped him yourself ,lol . And like i said, if i saw him on the street ,i would think he is in your words "a wierd one".

Toks2008:
You just confirmed that you are not only a chronic ranter but very incoherent in your arguement.

So in your mind these people are not more respected and successful than your presumed CEOs.

Madam...i don hear, thanks for your insight.

lol , you said CEOs earlier,i wasnt the one who said it, you even mentioned bankers ,isnt that the picture you should have used as examples? Show us the CEOs and public figures outside the entertaiment industry,lol .Or you added that to make your comment sweet? Abeg show us the CEOs o mr exposure ,lol

Toks2008:
Just proving to you that you are a chronic ranter who chooses to live in the past.

Please remain there...this is the 21st century.

They are all connected with one thing entertainment,i was expecting the CEOs of popular brands or world inventions or something or maybe a resident or popular world figure or even a doctor . The people in the entertainment industry get a pass ,show me someone else .

Toks2008:
You are still ranting.

lol,out of breathe so soon?nor be fight, you dont have to become rude because you have run out of defense to use,this one you have resorted to pictures so . .

Toks2008:
Oga you need exposure. Leave so these rants.

actually i am a lady .And like i said,its all about preference ,i am sure a duchess will expected to act and look a certain way.

And they are not rants or you dont know what rants mean? Maybe you should check the meaning,and if after you know the meaning you call it a rant, then i think you are the one that needs the exposure ,OK bye then.

Toks2008:
Everyone should do what makes them happy and if you prefer a confirmed olosho with no ear piercing let alone the 9ne with earrings to a super decent babe with even tongue piercing nah your choice.

And I also guess it is all about exposure...in the western world there are countless corporate guys who are CEOs and bankers in suit with earrings.

I wonder why there are no tattoo wearing people especially those ones on the face or ear ring wearing people at G7 submit or at world leaders world conferences,or sagging jeans in certain board meetings .

If you want to look like a rock star, good for you by all means do you,but don't be angry if someone addresses you as a rock star.Even in the so called exposed world i don't think a doctor with a face tattoo will be hired even if he were the best,there are sterotypes everywhere,even in the so called exposed worlds, it might not be ear piercing but one form or the other there is, so you either suck it up or don't be the target if you cant take it.

A book is literally judged by its cover in the real world, people will look at you and form an opinion about you, most times you are not afforded the opportunity to interact with these people for them to get to know the real you. Same way people don't like you for no reason and you seem to flow well with others. If you choose to market yourself in a certain way,your choice not everyone will give you a chance to prove you are not what you look like,so why not give it your best first time.

Also there is something called environmental norm ,i am sure i wont find such CEOs,bankers etc wearing ear rings in an exposed and well organized country like Japan except in entertainment industry and triads gangs tho lol,even in the UK looking a certain way is seen as tasteless and not a sign of affluence and sophistication among certain social strata and class of people.

And like you said, everyone should do what makes them happy, if the op is not happy or wont be comfortable being seen in public with her, he should pull out let her find a man who will love her with her piercings, "a more exposed man like you".

Toks2008:
That is the beauty of life...everyone is entitled to his or her opinion...the irony is that you will see people smoking weed, nicotine and those who drink liquor like no tomorrow condemning people who do piercings or use earrings...CRAZY I must say.

I am personally allergic to smoke from cigarettes ,so i avoid them for my own good same way alcohol gives me headache so i would naturally not be a drinking buddy with a drunk. I am not condemning her but i reserve the right to form an impression about her based on her appearance. Same way you decide if someone is ugly or pretty based on their facial structure,its human nature.

So bros,

If you don't like drunks, dont marry a person that loves alcohol,
If you don't like tattoos,don't marry a person with tattoos and pressure them to clean it,
If you don't like piercings ,don't marry someone that likes it and force them to take it off,
If you don't like smokers ,dont marry a smoker and force them to quit the habit.

If not na so unnecessary wahala dey start for marriage.I am sure there are guys out there who dont mind her piecings .

oluwaahmed:
I agree, cos the Archbishop of Canterbury (the leader of the Anglican church) is buharis close friend, that he visits buhari every time he's in the UK? Its definitely not to convert him

anyway, las las it cannot be hidden for ever,who knows 50 years from now ,everything will be out.

Toks2008:
I use to have this mindset until recently.

Bro nah for naija una dey read bad meaning to all those things.

Just study her character and if you like it abeg marry her.

Tatoos tongue piercing nose piercing or multiple piercings may not look too good but it means nada.

Even me sef dey put on clipped earring on my left ear occasionally and I'm a definition of a total responsible guy and I mean 100% heaven bound holy ghost filled believer in Christ.

Anyway ,i cant say i blame people stereotyping piercings, it takes a minute to size up a person, and your physical appearance makes up 90% of this sizing. I will still not respect a guy from yankee putting on this kind of ear rings, cos na yahoo boy,pickup guys, drugs moles ,wire wire or even factory worker with no meaningful reputation i go add you join.


There is a saying that you should dress the way you want to be addressed there is a certain way people who are into metal music dress from hip hop same way what you do reflects on your dress sense hence engineers barely wear suits.

While i will say the sterotyping on double ear piercings might be too extreme, but leg chains, tattoos ,nipple piercings are never wrong to be sterotyped cos most times it turns out to be true about the people with this kind of appearance. I saw a lady the other day ,a mother with a tattoo and nose percing even what she was wearing , i just shook my head,her appearance alone was appalling while she might have a good heart but i dont go around with a microscope to know her inner heart(if there is even something like that sef),so i will forgive myself for that.

Also lets not forget the lady is not a teenager, the op didnt meet her with piercings, she is impulsive ,this is my fear for the OP, cos i cant ascertain just how far she will take this her impulsive nature to.

oluwaahmed:
Hmm, this is interesting. Cheek bone and jaw present in the old buhari but missing in the new one? No they are not the same person! No matter how old you get bones don't shrink.

it will shock you to know some foreign countries are vested in this scam too. The same britons who came as friends and turned land grabbers and artifacts stealers is where buhari goes for treatment. I guess the colonial masters are still trying to protect their pet project aka the niger- area.

Enemyofpeace:
God bless you real good. You are a very responsible and decent lady. Truth be told, op eyes dey outside, she still wan play away games. Her husband should take their children out for a DNA test.

e never reach like that. I think the problem here is that the op is not seeing things from her husband's perspective hence she outrightly believes she is not wrong and her husband is just being jealous. The reason she brought it here is so she can have different views which is why we should give her that instead of rushing to attack her.

The op needs to know when to draw the line. Honestly it annoys me when someone asks for a private picture,like why not just view it there ,even on whatsapp,that is why my picture is on my dp for crying out loud not to talk of someone's wife. Many guys dont know how to restrain themselves,its now up to her to set that boundary.

WildChild00:
Well ladies differs, when love is in the air, you can do anything, love @ first sight, it sweeps u off ur feet and u do crazy stuff.

Its all likeness,affection and sometimes lust, while it can sustain a temple and grow into love over time, its also likely to burn out easily depending on the emotional make up of the person. Some people get this dopamin rush derive less and less satisfaction from the source of the rush ,so with time the get less interested and move on.

So in other words ,there is nothing like love at first sight.

WildChild00:
Sometimes it does happens wen you are in love, the spirit moves faster than the soul, if you know wat I meant.

Being inlove doesn't mean you should throw etiquette out the window. By the way who falls inlove that fast? I dont even take such guys seriously. We just met and only chatted for two days.

Preciousgirl:
A friend requested my picture on Facebook and I sent him.

My hubby found it out and for three weeks he is not talking to me. I have apologised, tried everything but he is not talking. I am so confused and sad. Please what should I do?


Only sensible comments

its Facebook ,and your pictures are on Facebook so why will this friend request for a picture in private when your entire wall is filled with pictures? don't you have pictures on your Facebook wall?.

This happened to me a few days ago, a guy asked me for my picture ,and i obviously had a picture on my dp, i told him the picture on my dp is recent he insisted i sent him another one, i just ignored him. And i am not even married o. Madam, to what end will you send someone a picture when the said person should have gone to view it themselves?

Your husband has every reason to be angry, if the reverse was the case how will you feel about it? You have to go an apologize and hence forth know when to draw the line. I am not saying you should not have friends, but there should be a boundary. You are married ,and should respect that institution . If it were me ,i would not be comfortable seeing my husband send his picture to someone on Facebook. So he is not jealous ,you are just plain wrong.

ubunja:
Have you ever met me?

on this day no lie was told my me

ubunja:
are you drunk or something? Have you seen your own threads?

, atleast i am no baby mama, nor an old person wishing he could turn back the hands of time upon realizing he cant wants people to become a babydaddy just like him.