₦airaland Forum

@OP

You're on point.

The took this photograph at Chief Orji Uzo Kalu's house at Igbere. That was about 8 years ago.

hope4black:
Your words motivates me, thanks.
Life is not just fair on my side, whether I believe in God or not.
There was a time in my life that I stop putting all my mind on God trying to do all my best ,like just being good. For about two to three years I stopped praying. Not that I don't believe or have the feeling that there is God out there but the issue then was that whenever I go to church and listen to sermons I do felt in my heart that I'm doing the wrong thing,that I have to change, I will condemning myself that I have to put God totally in charge of my life.

The moment I start to have a change of mind and trusting in God again with all my body ,spirit and soul, frustration, lack , sorrow ,depression will come in again.

My point is that, whether I believe in God or not, is still all the same, life has been unfair, I count myself among the unlucky ones.

I wonder how you're unable to decode an answer to your problem even when I repeatedly laid it bare for you in my previous submissions.

hope4black:
Thanks, how will it be possible for me to start living this way without hoping and believing in God.

And of cause if God doesn't care I will stop believing about any God out there, if that's how I'm going to be successful.

Foremost, I never said that there's no God/Allah/creator. I'm simply spiritual but not religious. For all I care and know, the presence of subconscious makes every homo sapiens a spiritual being.

Now, to your inquires: (1) The possibility of you living and believing but not hoping in God: Before I go on, like I said earlier on, he's already given human beings all we need to exist and succeed independent of his minute interventions. Whatever you lack, there's someone somewhere that has it, so learn how to become a good deal maker. And remember that honesty remains the best policy in business. So, the possibility of you living and believing but not hoping in God is by way of embracing altruism. Altruism simply means being of goodness towards anything and everything without an ulterior motive of gaining anything in return. I am talking about selflessness. . . This doesn't mean that good things will elude you or that when people extend goodness to you that you shouldn't accept it or that you shouldn't aim for profit/wage in business, no. It simply meanings that you aren't going to be an opportunist like 99.9% of all religious proponents and practitioners are. By the way, opportunity is different from opportunism. While there's nothing wrong with the former there's everything wrong with the latter.

(2) God cares. He remains a perfect being. We human beings are just imperfect manifestation of a perfect him, so stop trying to dissect him, because no person can comprehend and validate something beyond his understanding.

Meanwhile, kindly get insight on something valuable, commercialize it and see yourself succeeding. Become success conscious rather than money conscious. Avoid conceit at all cost, because it remains the bane of poverty among very many formally educated folks. Conceited people knows everything but understand nothing - I term them inarticulate incompetents.

VULCAN:
...and if she hasn't been faithful?

If she hasn't been faithful to him, he should be witty enough to grab an unsolicited fact to nail her instead of being suspicious against her, and then take a decisive and bold step by walking out of her life. It's an insult to mete out suspicions towards anyone no matter the circumstance.

If you've been faithful to him, don't give him and also kindly walkout of the relationship. Such a guy can never make a good partner in the long run. If at all you want to give it to him it should be strictly on your volition, not because he coercively demanded for it.

It hurts when someone you've been loyal to, continually metes out distrust or unappreciation towards you. Obviously you're dealing with a domineering guy. . . Prejudice, jealousy and insatiableness are some of their major hallmarks.

You owe him loyalty not servility. A healthy relationship never drain's either of the parties involved.

Feeble-minded people and superficiality is like 5 and 6.

We need a leader not a ruler. However, where s/he comes from, and generational, social and economic classes are irrelevant as far as I'm concerned.

Besides, power is never given rather its fought for. He who need power should fight for it.

michaelwestern:
An unsentimental person wont call daddy Adeboye a predator.

Calling him a predator already shows that he has a bias against him.

About the statement, daddy Adeboye didn't say that no woman is better than his wife. The person you're supporting made a personal interpretation of the statement but is refusing to accept the conclusion anybody else draws from the statement, that is sentiment.

Just shut up sheeple. I know you and your ilks.

@OP

Your problems are self inflicted, just like 99.9 percent of other religious proponents and practitioners. You all sees God as a trade by barter platform, thus, the reason why you have failed to accept responsibility of your actions and inaction.

Kindly redefine your concept about God - forget about whatever religion has taught you about God, take yourself to a default state of a day old child, one that's witty.

After you achieved the above feat, consider to embrace a thought line that sees God as being just, one who has given human beings all they need to exist independent of his minute interventions. One who neither expect prayers nor praises from you. He whom the only means you reverence him is through your good deeds towards your fellow human beings.

The next stage will be for you to embrace a thorough change of ethical leanings. Embrace diplomatic ethical leanings and discard manipulative ethical leanings. While the latter will always win you instant admiration which you will lose within a twinkle on an eye the former will always earn you respect. As the saying goes manipulators lose credibility diplomats gain it.

Well, I'll stop here for now to say more later. But I assure of success in a no distant time, if you can make the necessary changes.

Most of you always like to inconvenient yourselves intentionally. Before you enter into any relationship, set your standard (principles) and make sure you exhibits them, then, if your partner's behavior doesn't fall within your set standard, you walkout of the relationship in good faith. You're whining because she's opposite of what you need, so why not take a walk.

A healthy relationship never drain's either of the parties involved.

DrayZee:
You only assumed what you wanted to assume.
No two people can be the same. That's another way of looking at what he said.
He never said no woman could be better than his wife.

Calm down and see properly before reaching a conclusion.

You're a typical sheeple. You and your ilks are always ready to sell your mothers to defend mere predators. The subject and body of the thread says it all, so keep your myopic and biased thought to yourself. Kindly look for your mates elsewhere, because I don't join issue with people, least of all a feeble-minded person like you and your ilk.

juwoonn:
May God forgive you because you don't know what you're doing.

I don't join issue with a nincompoop, so vamoose from my mention. I know that a small-minded person like you would be ready to deny your mother, sister(s) and other virtuous women in your life just to validate a spite of a statement like this from a mere predator.

Nonsense. A humble person wouldn't be caught condescending against others just to have a good feel. If he had said "it's impossible to find for myself another good woman like my wife" that would be understandable. But saying that "it's impossible to find a woman like his wife" is an outright insult to every good woman out there.

Believe you me, the actual reason why most fathers are neglected at old age, despite given all their best to cater for their households in their primes, are because they have frenemies as wives. Most evil women has the habit of poisoning their children's heart, against their father's, through evil acts like belittling and denigrating them ( the husbands) in their absences. This gets worse when such an evil woman become the breadwinner of her household, and gets worst if the children are feeble-minded even at adult stage. Only evil men deserves such evil treatments.

Be you either a good woman or man, who's unmarried, avoid marrying a domineering, selfish, greedy, insatiable, self-centered and disingenuous person, to avoid stories that touches. These are the common attributes women that causes such havocs against their husbands do possess.

Meanwhile, in some rare cases, it can be vice versa. A case study is Emeka Ike and his wife.

pocohantas:
Ehen! Now you come. You should have used this word..."domineering". The 'too' confident got you misunderstood.

How far! Actually domineeringness is different from overconfidence (too confident). All domineering people are too confident but not all too confident people are domineering. While major hallmarks of domineering people are both pride and greed (or greed's cousin covetousness) that of too confident people is strictly pride, and the pride is always induced by inferiority complex - more like empty vessels. They're always feeble-minded despite their seemingly boisterous and coercive persona.

Confidence itself is sure a good attribute. All the confident people I know are humble and principled, so its congenital.

Do have a lovely weekend.

Your friend has a frenemy as a wife. It's unfortunate that he didn't know her well enough before contracting the marriage with her. Her actions and inaction as you have narrated has nothing to do with her lack of business acumen. She's self-centered, compassionless and disingenuous.

Solution; foremost, this is not a matter of separation or divorcing - at least not for now. He should know what he need himself, moral-wise, practice same and preach same to his wife - citing your submissions, he's already practicing some good moral acts. If she has an atom of compassion and wish to live in a happy home with her husband, she'll take the choice to learn good morals and act same. However, if she fails to embrace a change in morality, he should do the needful. Living with a frenemy in the guise of a wife/friend is very dangerous. Enemy within is the worst form of enemy.

Overconfidence (too confident lady/person) isn't a good attribute no matter the gender of the person that possess it. Intellectually and Literally, they knows everything but understand almost nothing. Wittily, they're too clever by half but never clever. It gets worse when you meet one that equally possesses boisterous personality.

A confident lady sure pass.

I neither hear nor see any evil in the woman's action. A man that has a cute child and wife is indeed lucky.

FG should really look into this deadly matter of building collapses here and there. Even though builders aren't to be spared, but the cement manufactures has to share major part of the blame.

Meanwhile, experience has shown me that most informal trained builders are more reliable and competent than majority of the formally trained ones - the articulate incompetents. I wager a formally trained builder was in charge of the collapsed building.

erico2k2:
The definition of trafficking as moving people from A to B by deceit and payment being made is no applicable in the Nigerian Context . I worked with an NGO from the UK for 3 month in Niger Republic . .2009
Though I had to be empathetic , the vast majority of them knew what they where getting into.they had an agreement with thier trolley . (Traffickers )most of the guys think N400k will get them to Europe . Now tell me what did a girl of 22 thinks she is going to do in Italy ? Most or some of these guys buy maps and directions b4 they embark on the journey . Everyone throws in the trafficking card to gain sympathy from officials when stranded . Cos if you claimed you traveled at your own accord you ain't getting nothing . Only the vonorable are exempt .

There's no point arguing further because my last submission is clear and direct, of which you corroborated it by half. For your information I'm in a position that puts me in the know of the happenstances on issues of this nature.

erico2k2:
In as much I love to believe what you wrote I can asure you %99 of them knew what they where getting into.not trafficked . Nah the Adoro level be traffic back here E nor dey work.

If you accuse majority of the victims of ignorance induced by conceit or greed I'll agree with you. But saying that the traffickers are not evil and shouldn't be blamed, I won't agree with you.

A trafficker is like a typical predator - a fraudster or ungodly religious leader - he'll pretentiously make you to believe that paradise awaits you once you gratify him upfront and he led you to a specific destination/country. It takes a perfidious person to be a trafficker.

The perpetrators of this evil should be brought to book.

Hmm! Even though I'm irreligious, but I'm spiritual. And I know that every human being is spiritual too, because presence of subconscious makes every homo sapiens a spiritual being.

With regards to the caption of the thread, which is opposite of the thread content, if God/creator doesn't make sense to anyone, it's obviously from the prism the person is seeing him. Such a person should redefined his concept of God, on his own by putting religion and all the so called holy books aside - because any unassuming analytical but non insightful mind, would sure take the stance of atheists, after practicing for sometime any form of religion and reading the so called holy books (words of God) and experiencing real life firsthand. To achieve this feat, such a person have to consciously take himself to the default state of a day old child but a witty one.

There's God, he's just and he lives in everyone. He gave everyone all that one need to exist independent of his minute interventions. He neither expect anyone's prayers nor praises. To do good towards others is to reverence him.

OBJ is always consciously pretentious.

There's fairness in equality and equality doesn't negate first among equals philosophy. I've no regret being an egalitarian.

I love real feminists because they understand the importance of fairness and by extension they know that there's something like first among equals in marriage or any other romantic affair. And of course, at work place or any other public affairs, the best and most prepared automatically assumes first among equals role, irrespective of gender.

However, I loathe wannabe feminists because they always misconstrue what feminism is all about - they're not just misandrists but also oppressive. They aren't different from misogynists or oppressive men.

A typical oppressive man would always mistake submissiveness for servitude and as such expects the latter from his wife always. So also, an oppressive woman would always take or try to take advantage of her man's loyalty to mete out all sorts of shenanigans towards him.

I've neither regards for misogynists/oppressive men nor misandrists/oppressive women - these classes of people sees loyalty as a sign of weakness. I doff my hat for all fairness proponents and practitioners while extending my utmost respect to all goodness proponents and practitioners.

Show me a self-acclaimed perfectionist and I will point to you a hypocrite of the highest order. I've always have them around me in most of my endeavors and my diplomatic prowess always help me to have them under my submission in the long run of associating with them.

Their major attributes are conceitedness and disingenuousness, so when you come across them mete out an effacing and conscientious attitudes towards them and see them come to your submission.

Perfectionist shouldn't be mistaken for conscientious/principled people. No human being is gifted enough to be perfect.

Nnamdi Kanu is obviously suffering from environmental delusion. A wise man doesn't stand in front of a moving trailer to stop it in order to register his displeasure against the driver.

Yes. Personally, I can proudly cook for a girlfriend or wife and such can never make me less a man. What makes a man or a woman an Alpha isn't trivial things like stature, economic, academic and social stratas, or arrogance, rudeness or any other negative attitude. Alphas are what they are because they command respect of many people that crosses their paths; including insane but most importantly sane and sound ones of their gender species more especially and people of opposite gender in general. This they earn as a result of their goodness devoid of avoidable servility and evil towards others.

I can even cook for a stranger - irrespective of stratum - if need be, and since I can do such for a stranger, I don't see an inhibition in proudly doing so for a girlfriend or wife.

Small-minded people and suspicion, conceit and prejudice are like 5 and 6. You have no dominion over him, thus he owe you no obligation, therefore it amount to nuisance for you to become a source of negative energy towards him through your negative attitude.

Stop being hypocritically righteous.

He was rather metaphoric with that statement. It's all about diplomacy. My statement however doesn't nullify the obvious impact - either good or bad - of the pastor on his followers.

Hello! Have you found solution to your business need?