Rihanna's umbrella song, Especially the ella, ella,ella part.

and bobby V's anonymous

most violent movie that left me disturbed is -SAW I, II & III
now that is violent

action packed- Boon dock saints, 3oo, kill bill, All the DIE HARD movies, Apocalypto, lord of the rings.

Get on the right diet and stomach crunches.

thats the only way to go cos even if u can afford liposuction, its just a jump start u still have to do crunches (situps).

try swimming as well its good ab exercise.

A blood test is 100% accurate darling, so go get one.
do u have any symptoms like excessive eating, laziness, tender boobs, vomiting and so on? check urself honey, and always use protection, we always forget there are worse things than getting pregnant from unprotected sex.

@ Tranquil, where have u been girl, long time no post ur sobby stories about u and ur loverman. i can see ur getting over the pain and self pity and the and hate is coming out.

You forgot to remind the nairalanders feeling soryy for you that the guy that has finally dumped you is ur married boss from work. Maybe he has decided to go back to his family and be faithful to his wife.

Sorry girl if it was a single jerk u were sobbing over i would have been more nicer but knowing its a married man that has been treating u like shit from ur former posts dating back about 2 months, ur on ur own on this one babe.

Move on to single guys. and as someone said "hope u chop belle full"?

First of all, NEVER marry any man that doesnt have a job, cos no he will not get one and he only wants u to take care of his lazy arse.

NEVER stay with a man that hits u. first a slap, then a punch, soon it will be a gun down ur throat.

Bw EXTRA CAREFUL with BLACK men. i'm sorryu to say this but we all know truthfully they are usually just scamming a way to get stay or citizenship.  

And him being a man, yes he will CHEAT on u. U aint gotta arse like a black girl and they still cheat on us with all the junk in our trunk.

Just watch some oprah, cry a little and get over it. Not all black nigerian men are D*ICK heads.

Hiya peoples,

I'm looking for a really good tailor. One that is very creative and can re-make styles exactly from catalogues or magazines. i recently purchased alot of ankara and woodin materials and i dont want any tailor to mess it up. Pls if u have any ideas or contacts for really good tailors that are very stylish and should i say "know whats up" (contemporary) pls post his/her contact info. thanks

ps- Preferably in the lagos axis.

What about giving the first salary of the year (January). is that also a way of giving first fruit. Paying tithes is quite clear, thats giving a tenth of whatever income u get and its more of a command or order by God, unlike giving offerings that is optional.

But i'm still not quite clear of this first fruit issue. do i have to give my first salary of every year as my first fruit?

What about giving the first salary of the year (January). is that also a way of giving first fruit. Paying tithes is quite clear, thats giving a tenth of whatever income u get and its more of a command or order by God, unlike giving offerings that is optional.

But i'm still not quite clear of this first fruit issue. do i have to give my first salary of every year as my first fruit?

Just curious, so does this mean those that fall under the 2.2 and 3rd class are to be left unemployed since they are the undesirables? now we know why so many people are unemployed in nigeria.

Maybe the guy is gay!!!

But seriously i know what u must be going thru, been there, done that, wrote the book. its very painful, because u feel rejected at the end. i'm not going to preach the usual "he's not worth it" speech, all i can say is with time u'll get over him and move on to people who can appreciate u.

but also i mjust add that sadly, u dont always get over all of them.

first of all, ur cousin's sister is also ur cousin silly!

and that makes it incest. as long as you share some kind of blood link between you, its incest. try a second cousin.

Not if he doesnt want to get bankrupted.

Once upon a time, there lived a beautiful Queen with voluptuous breasts. Nick the Dragon Slayer obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to touch them, but he had to try.

One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, the King's chief doctor. Horatio thought about this and said that he could arrange for Nick to more than satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange it. Without pause Nick readily agreed to the scheme.

The next day, Horatio made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's brassiere while she bathed.
Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had shown that only the saliva of Nick would work as the antidote to cure the itch.

The King quickly summoned Nick. Horatio then slipped Nick the antidote for the itching powder, which he put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Nick worked passionately on the Queen's voluptuous and magnificent breasts.

The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick left satisfied and hailed as a hero. Upon returning to his chamber, Nick found Horatio demanding his payment of 1,000 gold coins.

With his obsession now satisfied, Nick couldn't have cared less and, knowing that Horatio could never report this matter to the King, and with a laugh told him to get lost. The next day, Horatio slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned Nick and…………….

This blessed me. I hope it does the same for you…,



Hi,
Some years ago on a hot summer day in south Florida, a little boy
decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole behind his house.
He flew into the water, not realizing that as he swam toward the

middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore.
His father, ran toward the water, yelling to his son as loudly as he
could.
Hearing his voice, the little boy became alarmed and made a U-turn to
swim to his father. It was too late . Just as he reached his father,
the alligator reached him. From the dock, the father grabbed his little boy by the
arms just as the alligator snatched his legs. That began an incredible tug-of-war
between the two. The alligator was much stronger than the father, but the father was much too passionate to let go. A farmer happened to drive by, heard his screams, raced from his truck, took aim and shot the alligator.

Remarkably, after weeks and weeks in the hospital, the little boy
survived. His legs were extremely scarred by the vicious attack of
the animal. And, on his arms, were deep scratches where his father's fingernails dug into his flesh in his effort to hang on to the son he loved.

The newspaper reporter who interviewed the boy after the trauma,
asked if he would show him his scars. The boy lifted his pant legs. And
then, with obvious pride , he said to the reporter, " But look at my arms. I
have great scars on my arms, too. I have them because " My Dad " wouldn't let go. "

You and I can identify with that little boy. We have scars, too. No,

not from an alligator, but the scars of a painful past . Some of
those scars are unsightly and have caused us deep regret But, some wounds, my friend, are because God has refused to let go In the midst of your struggle, He 's been there holding on to you.
You are a child of God. He wants to protect you and provide for you
in every way. But sometimes we foolishly wade into dangerous situations,
not knowing what lies ahead. The swimming hole of life is filled with
peril- and we forget that the enemy is waiting to attack. That's when the
tug-of-war begins - and if you have the scars of His love on your
arms be very, very grateful.
He did not and will not ever let you go.
Please pass this on to those you love. God has blessed you, so that
you can be a blessing to others. You just never know where a person
is in his/her life and what they are going through.

Never judge another persons scars, because you don't know how they
got them. Also, it is so important that we are not selfish to receive
the blessings of these messages without forwarding them to someone else.

Right now, someone needs to know that God loves them, and you love
them too enough to not let them go.

You are more than sparrows.

The following are not my words nor are they sacrosant. But they are a compelling read to me. All rights to the original owner.]



When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and

said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly.

Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know

what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.



She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly,

why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the

chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't

talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what

had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory

answer, she had lost my heart to Dew. I did'nt love her anymore, I

just pitied her!



With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated

that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She

glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten

years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her

wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had

said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of

me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a

kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several

weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.



The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something

at the table. I did'nt have supper but went straight to sleep and fell

asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did

not care so I turned over and was asleep again.



In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want

anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She

requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a

life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a

months time and she did'nt want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.



This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to

recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of

our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going

crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd

request.



I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and

thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to

face the divorce, she said scornfully.



My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was

explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we

both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy

in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. >From the bedroom to

the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in

my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, don't tell our son about

the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside

the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the

office.



On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my

chest, I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I

hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realised she

was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair

was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I

wondered what I had done to her.



On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy

returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to

me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy

was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to

carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me

stronger.







She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few

dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my

dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so

thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly

it hit me, , she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.

Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.



Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum

out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an

essential part of his life. My wife

gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my

face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last

minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through

the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and

naturally. I held her body tightly, it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held

her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I

held her tightly and said, I had'nt noticed that our life lacked

intimacy.



I drove to office, jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the

door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind, I walked

upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not

want the divorce anymore.



She looked at me, astonished. Then touched my forehead. Do you have a

fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I

won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I

didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each

other any more. Now I realise that since I carried her into my home on

our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Dew

seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the

door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.



At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my

wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and

wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.



The small details of your lives are what really matter in a

relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property , the money in

the bank, blah, blah, blah. These create an environment conducive for

happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be

your spouse's friend

and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have

a real happy marriage!

I'd confront him about it and let him know that i'm willing to forgive him this time since its a known fact all men are d*ck brains, and it must not happen again, or he should learn how to code it very well. Next time he wont get off this easy . Then give him a kiss and cook his favourite meal and later give him a nice Mouth Action.

Gay or not, everyone should have freedom of expression. if u feel like hugging a guy, go for it. Whats anyones bizness if ur gay, others should learn not to discriminate against others.

under what circumstances were you raped? The sympathy u get will be determined by this question. If it was a situation you could have avoided, dont bet on it.

As much as i'd like to tell you to share your issues with ur bf, the sad truth of the matter is he will never look at u the same way, and mite even leave u. DO NOT tell ur boyfriend u were raped. its really hard for guys to look passed that and sympathise with u.
Try telling ur best friend or a sister. but never ur boyfriend, unless it happened b4 he ever met u.

iTS APPAULING!!!!!

An ex-boyfriend once told me that it was almost like tradition now for the women in his town to be pregnant. they want to be sure the girls st6ill have wombs and that they themselves are not shooting blanks.

some girls do it to force men to marry them, but wheres the joy or happiness in that? in skool there were a few girls that got pregnant and the guys bailed on them. now they are young single mothers and no young guy wants to even look at them at all.

i cant imagine not looking fit and sexy in my wedding dress. and as for the churches that condole this behaviour, shame on them.

Lagoschic:
God forgives so who am i

Word!!!

Cards that should be available



1. I always wanted to have someone, someone to love. And now that you've come into my life,
(Inside card) - I've changed my mind.

2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life,
(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you.

3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am,
(Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin it for me ,

4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go,
(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need it again.

5. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age,
(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!

6. When we were together, you said you'd die for me,
(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

7. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy,
(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father was?

8. You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket,
(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you often .

9. Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday,
(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.

10. Looking back over the years that we have been together, I can't help but wonder,
(Inside card) - What the hell was I thinking

11. I'm so miserable without you,
(Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.

12. Thank you for being part of my life,
(Inside card) - I never knew what evil was until I met you!

13. Congratulations on your wedding day!
(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband.

14. How can I say this,
(Inside card) - Your cooking kills me

15. Hooray,
(Inside card) - You're divorced.

16. I just want you to know that I'm sorry for what happened,
(Inside card) - Especially since you survived.

17. Congrats on getting married,
(Inside card) - It's not everyday you decide to ruin your life.

18. Someday I hope to marry,
(inside card) - Someone other than you.

19. We have been friends for a very long time,
(inside card) - What do you say we stop?

A woman who died found herself standing outside the Pearly Gates, being greeted by St. Peter.

She asked him, "Oh, is this place what I really think it is? It's so beautiful.

Did I really make it to heaven?"

To which St. Peter replied, "Yes, my dear, these are the Gates to Heaven. But you must do one more thing before you can enter." The woman was very excited, and asked of St. Peter what she must do to pass through the gates. "Spell a word," St. Peter replied. "What word?" she asked.

"Any word," answered St. Peter. "It's your choice." The woman promptly replied, "Then the word I will spell is love. L-o-v-e."

St. Peter congratulated her on her good fortune to have made it to Heaven, and asked her if she would mind taking his place at the gates for a few minutes while he went to the bathroom.

"I'd be honored," she said, "but what should I do if someone comes while you are gone?"

St. Peter reassured her, and instructed the woman to simply have any newcomers to the Pearly Gates to spell a word as she had done.

So the woman is left sitting in St. Peter's chair and watching the beautiful angels soaring around her when a man approaches the gates. She realizes it is her loser husband.

"What happened?" she cried, "Why are you here?"

Her husband stared at her for a moment, then said, "I was so drunk when I left your funeral, I was in an accident. And now I am here? Did I really make it to Heaven?"

To which the woman replied, "Not yet. You must spell a word first."

"What word?" he asked.

The woman responded, "Czechoslovakia."

Marriage is an expression of love, respect, trust and faith in the future. But the union of husband and wife is also an alliance against the challenges and tragedies of life. it is a promise that with me by your side, you will never stand alone.

it is also the dire need to have someone bear witness to ur life. at the end, no one wants to be alone. You live alone, u die alone. Even the bravest men are scared shiless of lonliness.

Foerever. Ever heard oof adoption?

I am from northern nigeria and a christian by faith.

My sisters schooled in the north (ABU Zaria) and i often heard stories of all the religious riots there. its amazing the number of people filled with so much aggression and hatred, waiting for the opportunity to lynch someone or kill. and they have the perfect excuse, their beliefs.

i think islam supports discrimination in a way, becos even the term "infidel" is very derrogatory. why call someone that becos they have different beliefs. We all need more love and tolerance in out hearts. its a sad situation.

May God give the lady's family comfort and the heart to bear their loss.

Its either he's got haemohrroids? pile, or he's gay and having anal sex in an uncomfortable way.

Either way, go see a doctor.

Largest erect penis: 13"
Smallest erect: 1.75"

The Caramoja tribe of northern Uganda tie a weight the end of their joysticks to enlongate them sometimes to such a degree that the men literally have to knot them up.

In 1609 a doctor named Wecker found a corpse in Bologna with 2 joysticks. Since then, there have been 80 documented cases of men with the same.

During pre-intimacy, a woman's breast can increase in up to 25%.

The maximum depth at which vaginal stimulation occurs is only 2".

In the 1950s, it was found out that 75% of men cum within 2 minutes of penetration, with the orgasm lasting no longer than a few seconds. The longest documented for a women is one minute.

Among the Mangaians of Polynesia, 18 year old couples make love an average of 3 times a night, every night, until they're in their 30s, when the weekly average drops to a mere 14.

The maximum speed at which the erotic sensations travel from the skin to the brain has been clocked 156 MPH.

Women are 30% more sexually active during a full moon, and the most common love making time in the US is 11:00pm.
Intercourse peaks in July.

Except for the 1/2 dozen men who've shown up in emergency rooms over the years because they got too intimate with a vacuum cleaner, women are the more creative auto-eroticists, and they masturbate most frequently when in a stable relationship.
Women are also better self-starters. 60% claiming to have discovered orgasm on their own, as opposed to only 25% of men.

Castrated men live an average of 13 years longer than those not castrated. And nuns live longest of all

If all women must know how to cook and it is their sole duty in marriage or union with a man, then by all means all men must be rich, it is their sole duty to go and fend for all the needs of the family.

Thus she gives you a fantastic meal and you can show ur gratitude by giving her a big diamond.

After all what's the value of a man, if he cant afford a fabulous life for his woman.