₦airaland Forum

@OP
move to a better place

MrsChima:
You don come again bro? . Don't you remember that cartoon you made of me getting beaten and Koyoye came to my rescue...I think it is needed on this thread!

Men talked sh1t about beating other women but when it comes to beating other men you niggas wanna sing Kum ba yah and sh1t!

Punks!

yeah you are right that some men will be quick to beat a woman and become a biatch when a big man is doing the same thing...... this is certainly not my school of thought. any person who raise their hands on me , i will have to defend myself (its self defense) but, if my woman went and open her mouth and got herself in trouble, then she must be ready to deal with the consequences of HER BIG MOUTH!

lol, i dont remember where that pic is but here is one for you:

MrsChima:
These punk ass niggas!

we know your kind Mrs C.... women with poisonous tongues quick to insult everyone out there, also quick to beat down everyone or anyone around, and then (if needs be) ask your man to "save your honour". you do know that punk ass niggas live long healthy happy lives? lol!
i want to live a long healthy happy life!

Ayima:
This really surprises me, why would a man have two good wives at home but still go outside to look for sex? my uncle married two wives but his two wives always complain of him going outside for sex, i am still wondering if this kind of attitude is a curse or just a normal thing because sometimes i feel like confronting him. Please guys should i approach my uncle to really know why he does that?

the fact that you believe that marrying two wives means that a man wouldnt cheat, is the reason why you will always fail in understanding this issue.

FIRST you need to sit down and ask yourself why men cheat. the day you have an answer for that question is the day you will be closer to understand the problem here.

SECOND men are different.....dont you have men out there married to 5/6 wives? so, wouldnt you say that... if a man needs 5/6 wives to satisfy him in life then, the man who only has 2 is definitely lacking.

THIRD why would you even think that these "two good wives" provided for the sex that this man desired? they may be good in cooking and raising children, while being useless in bedroom acrobatics. if a woman is NOT the freak that a man desires in the bedroom, then this man will ALWAYS be sexually lacking, and miserable.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST do not confront this man EVER!!!! this is his life, his choice, his own cross to carry and none of your business what he decides to do with his own life. you may enquire about his life but thats about it. if you go ask his wives they will tell you what he says when THEY complain to him about it....and you will have the answers to all your questions.

BTW: have you ever consider the fact that this man may be cheating on his wives simply because HE CAN?!

midolian:
I think I ve watched this film b4...remind me abeg, What's the title of that movie again?

you want the Hollywood version, the Bollywood version or the Nollywood one? there are so many, lol!

although that man will end up in jail before that same evening, i wouldnt have to tell GF what to do, as she would be the one quickly dialling the cops numba. what lady in her right mind, that respects her man, would even want to see her man fist fight in the street like a common criminal?!

NONSENSE!!!!

@kinibigdeal

A lot of guys I know have basically given up trying to get women.

who should we settle with if we now give up on women?! haba bro, better clear your head because the obvious choice outside women is MEN o!!!!

Women are too choosy.

bro, i dont know about you but i want to feel special, i want to feel like the guy conquering mount Everest, i want to believe that dating that lady is not something that ANY man can achieve and its because of my "hardwork", and also who i am as a person, that i succeeded. so yes, i expect women to be choosy rather than settle for any donkeys that come their way, without a say in the matter.

Women aren't approachable.

raise your game bro and find a way to catch her attention. many are looking at their phones because they have nothing better to do. if you find something interesting to offer them to do instead, they might.

Women have a self-entitled attitude.

we ALL do man... and a woman can wish that you do whatever she wants, its down to you to decide if you want to do it or not. but hey, we all want to become the center of the universe for our chosen ladies.

Women want "jerks", "bad boys", etc.

be YOU, and if the man you are is NOT the type of man a lady is seeking then move on with your life seeking for a proper Cinderellas for yourslef. why put other people's problem in your own head simply because you wish to date a certain lady?
btw if "timid and passive" is the only choice apart from bad boys then maybe that is the reason why many of these ladies are choosing the bad boys.

so this thread is still up?!

as an avid Alonso Fan, and self proclaimed #1 Vettel hater, i have to say that this year is a disgrace (for me).

for Alonso to make that silly move to Mc Laren (we are still waiting for any sign that this will ever pay up), I CAN ACCEPT!
for Mc Laren to be as "really" bad as they are, I CAN ACCEPT!
to see Alonso retire over and over again, I CAN ACCEPT!
for Alonso to not even score a single point this year, I CAN ACCEPT!
for Vettel to move to Ferrari, I CAN ACCEPT!

BUT, for Ferrari "now" (after so many years) to have a great car that can challenge the leaders at the top, and its Vettel that will profit from that...... THAT, I CANT ACCEPT and its breaking my F1 fukcing heart!

instinctg:
the series is tied 2-2 as GS warriors won the latest game against the Cavaliers 103-82 with Iguodala impressing with 22 points.

although SC30 is Golden State "super" man, Iguodala was the man of the match last night! he was on FIIIIIIIRE!

A40:
Hahahaha couldn't have happened to a nicer person. I doubt Alonso would score a point this year. Ferrari has improved on Vettel's arrival, Red Bull has declined since Vettel's exit. Coincidence? I think not
The thread is still open check very well. I still posted about the last race in Montreal

Button did score some points so Alonso MUST score some points this yr....by fire or by force! i am going to seek fo that thread right away!

Truthfully I don't respond very well to ultimatums and emotional blackmail which is why if the guy is anything like me the girl might as well do like CeCe and keep on Walking. Women would be women and they all crave marriage at some point. I'm sure if it was a shorter relationship she wouldn't even be here asking this question, she would have since voted with her feet

exactly.....and communcication is all what is needed here, in order for all of them to be settled, once and for all.

Let's be clear I'm not saying the guy is at blame for anything. Same way the girl has every right to walk out of this relationship if its not going to have a desirable outcome for her. They should be willing to meet each other halfway.

i agree...... but sadly, sometimes the misplaced ego of men will get in the way, and thus, they would rather let go of that r/ship than live a life which is below their expectations. as i always say, it has to FEEL RIGHT for you before you do anything in this world, whether 3,7 or 20 yrs dating.

@JLM
you sound like a woman who is trying to sell a product that is getting closer to its sell by date? i suggest you women focus on being HAPPY first, it will do you a lot of good... because, if desperately seeking for a man to accept you as a bride, is solely what you do during these "prime" years of yours, then i am sorry to say that you are wasting them away. be happy with who you are as a person, be content with what you got and what you have achieved, count your blessings, focus on you etc.... and when you do, find someone who will possibly love you as much as you love yourself.... instead of seeking for someone to make you a "seemingly" valuable being.

if you believe that most r/ship must end up in marriage, then you do live in fantasyland.
if you believe that most r/ship over a certain period of time must end up in marriage then you are living in desperation land.
if you believe that marriage must be rushed because a woman gets older (aka body clock) then i can only weep for the miserable union you will end up into, as soon as you marry the donkey that decided to settle with you.

a man is not ready to marry a certain lady, he makes it CLEAR that he needs some foundations before he does (anyone thinking of marrying someone without any is a damn fool)....and therefore, he sticks to his goals/aim in life. how more of a clear picture do you think the OP needs here?! our forefathers had better foundations in their lives, better MINDSET, and they lived in a time where people valued each other for the RIGHT reasons. you cant compare these great people with the miserable ones who live today.

A40:
McLaren no try oo! Because of wetin dem do Alonso you no dey post for F1 section again.

bro, dont mention it, i have sleepless night when thinking of this BS move Alonso made this year, and as hard as i am telling myself it will be better eventually, every weekend it is getting worse and worse...especially when i now see Ferrari getting on the level of Mercedes (let alone Vettel moving there, KAI!!!!!). the thread is closed if not, i would have cried my eyes out on that thread, lol!

The goal of any person is to get a good job/business. I agree Nigeria of now is at the worst possible time to get married without a steady income. However I see nothing wrong with the girl trying to find out her position. I don't agree with biting your tongue for anybody and I don't think that's what the girl is suggesting but clearly she wants a commitment and I see nothing wrong with that. I've been there before only difference I tell these girls to do what works for them when they start acting funny or droning over and over about marriage. They are at two different places if you ask me

i fully understand that she must sit down and talk to her man FIRST, so she knows exactly where she stands in that union, but what i dont understand is the people blaming the guy for having goals in his life and following them. she cannot force something like that and it should come naturally. who would even want to be marrying someone who wouldnt say YES genuinely? this is no different than emotional blackmail (and some women are expert at it).

JLM:
Guy I am begining to suspect that you are the guy himself. Ladies should run from all guys with your type of mentality. My sista runnnnnnnnn!!! These are the types that love to eat their cake and still have it.

here is another confirmation of women and their low self esteem and insecurities. so, in your little world, a man who does not have the same goals as you "automatically" must be cheating?!

NO 1, I repeat No man who "loves" you will keep you hanging, u know y? cos love means he cares about your well being, and your future, and is concerned that you are a woman and your time is going.

what does love got to do with marriage?! are you saying that if you love someone you MUST marry them whenever YOU (women) are ready or/and desperate?! since when does 7yrs is the new limit for dating? funny how the care and wellbeing only matters when it is for women? (and we shouldnt care about the care and welbeing of men, right?)

Have seen guys who wen they are not ready for marriage, or they have a nice gal friend, and do not want to keep her waiting and frustrated, they call her and let her go , because they understand what it means for a woman to be kept waiting till her time is late
and cos they actually "love" her .

have we now become robots that we MUST act like all the other donkeys out there, like sheeps?!

the fact that you believe that a man should marry a lady simply because of her body clock is the most stoopid thing i have ever heard today, and i suggest you go and splash cold water on your face in order to get your senses back. any man or woman should use their HEAD/BRAIN into deciding if it is the right time to marry someone. they should NEVER use any other tool to evaluate whether they want to marry someone (or not). if all the necessary foundations are there, then they should plan on getting married, NOT BEFORE.

people like you have no RESPECT for marriage, and this is why you would think that anyone should get married for no damn reason, forget about their lifelong goals, and instead bring MISERABLE families into this world.

1) mum/dad
2) bank manager
3) boss
4) lover
5) ex

A40:
I'm not even a moralist or religious person but what is his commitment to her besides giving her his preeq? 7 years is not enough for her to find her level? Will you work for someone for 7 years without promotion?

bro A40
they started like that, grew up like that, and got down like that....for 7yrs. the lady's "assumptions" is what failed her, not this man. as she said, their goals was to ultimately have a good job, and obviously, this guy aint got one yet. would you rather he sets his goals aside in order to build a family with the wrong foundation? (to each their own as to what their foundations should be)

Majesty82:
Believe me, that guy will never marry you. Reasons.................... He is not afraid of losing you to other serious guys that may be your destined husband that's why he refuses to Discuss you future with you. 2 did i hear you shouting 7yrs of dating (sex) without marriage? Hmmm what a mistakes dear. What he is suppose to pay before getting it, he has gotten it b4 the payments so it will only take the grace of God before that guy discuss marriages with you. My advice to you is summon courage and quit now or..................

so let me get this straight, your woman that you dated for 7yrs starts to evaluate worthless strangers/donkeys that are asking her hand in marriage, and therefore out of fear of losing her to these puppets, you will now discuss marriage with her?! ahahahahahahaha come on bro!
if you can lose your woman to these deadbeat useless men, then this lady was never yours to begin with, and even if she was, she would have quickly given up on the union at the sight of the slightest problem. so no man should be afraid of losing such liability of a woman, NONE!

men will ALWAYS chat your woman up (if she is a dead banger) but the important point here is NOT for you to shield her from that, oh no, the important point is for her to RESPECT herself, RESPECT you and most importantly RESPECT your union. if she is using any of these useless donkey to try to blackmail you into doing anything you are not ready to do, then she is not fit to keep as your woman. you should have enough haterz in your life, rather than having a gf who is also working against you and your goals in life.

now if she wants you guys to get married, let her bring VALID, INTELLIGENT and WORTHY points to the table as to why imminent marriage is a must in your r/ship...... or let her be quiet (or go settle herself with these donkeys)!

lovemode:
and wats d guarantee dat after making d millions he will not dumb her and marry someone else?

there is no guarantee to that, but if we are now focus on guarantees and desperation because of body clock, INSTEAD OF love and being with someone that you can DIE for, then really....... whats the point of getting married then?

...we know ur type....millions can't be achieved with hard work alone its only gods blessing and favour dat last a life time

yet, in your mind, if "Gods blessings" dont come after 7yrs, you must look elsewhere?! what if it was "Gods decision" that this union dont have money, does that means this lady should go for greener pastures?

......am not just insupport of a lady waiting for a guy dats not on dsame page with her wen it comes to marriage.

dont you think that a lady should confirm what page her man his on before "assuming" that marriage after 7yrs is INEVITABLE, as the OP wrote?
remember, they never talked about marriage before.

millions can come anytime wether married or not...it depends on ur destiny......if u like work from now till 50years if u arnt destined to make millions u won't make it.

so what you are now saying is that not having money is ok so long as there is marriage? but what if someone DESIRES to have some financial stability before they get married and start a family, would you say it is wrong? why should it automatically be the desperate women's way and nothing else?!

although getting married could be free in 9ja, we all know what "getting married" in 9ja means. you ladies want the big wedding so you can boast to the whole world that you are "seemingly" happy, even if you aint. it is women's insecurity and desperation that have all of you act foolishly in the name of marriage.

if you REALLY love someone (as the OP said she did) then she wouldnt really care if they were married or not, and she would certainly "understand" her man.....and wait for him to be ready for marriage (why the rush anyway, if not body clock pressure?). just because she is ready after 7yrs, does NOT mean everyone should be. since when is 7yrs the benchmarks on dating limits before marriage? it is insecurity and desperation that have all you women marry the 1st donkeys out there, and then be miserable all your lives, instead of being reasonable about the issue. they both dreamed of a good job for 7 long yrs and, out of desperation, she now want them to marry (and subsequently have children) even if their goals are not met. yet you people are blaming the guy for sticking to their lifelong goals, haba!

no wonder the saying goes:" some women out there are just good at KILLING A MAN'S DREAM AND ASPIRATIONS!

of course, you MUST tell your wife, thats her home, thats the person who brought the maid, thats her issue... and you should never think of hiding such stuff from your spouse. possibly forgive your brothers for his horniness. the maid has got to go no questions about it, and the brotha better be finding another place to live asap, as you dont want him to corrupt every maid you will bring home.

if he can afford it and that was her prized/favourite possession, then let them be buried in a private jet if they want.
to each their own!

GS will recover and win.... no doubts about it!

lovemode:
why is it into u as such?....is d man in question ur relative?....and am also sure if she happen to be ur sister u 'll tell her these?

you didnt have to create a new profile just to reply to this thread (or ask me this silly question), you should have just be quiet instead, lol!
you see i dont sugarcoat shiit on NL, take my words for what they are and nothing more, whether you like it or die trying. my words are good for my sister, my mother or anyone related to me.

@thread
see as all you people are telling this confused lady to leave simply because you are all deluded with body clock and desperation to marry AT ALL COST, without for one second talking of what is important in life before you should remotely consider marrying anyone: LOVE/AFFECTION!!!!
here you lot are telling this lady to marry any of the donkeys (suitors) that are bothering her, then you will be the ones telling she is stupid when she open a thread a few yrs down the line because the man she married despises her guts and only used her in order to quench the pressures of marriage from family/church/friends etc.

then no wonder so many clueless men and women are marrying donkeys and thereafter curse the opposite gender because the person they married treated them like garbage.

if i ask all you deluded women (and men) if a man, who dont have a dime to call his own, can marry a lady, then you will all raise your arms and cry foulplay, but yet because this couple has spent 7yrs together, you now believe that they MUST marry, ahahahahahaha you bunch of hypocrites. this man hasnt even saved a mere $5000 (₦1million) to call his own, and you want this man to go and marry without a dime... of all places in 9JA.

desperate women would always try to cut corners in order to satisfy their desperate state of mind. see how the OP clearly wrote that: marriage was NEVER discussed, and that it was what she BELIEVED was inevitable.....now, body clock is ticking and you are here talking another language because of desperation (trying to force the guy to marry at all costs). the guy tells her what his stand on the issue is, and you now blame the guy for the situation.

i hate to be the bearer of bad news but you people should stop taking men for donkeys....as if we cant make any proper intelligent decision any longer just because we have spent 7yrs with a lady?! highly laughable!

another Harry Potter tale from good ol' 9ja!

abeg bro, dont forget to take your medicine!

15thMonica:

So which affordable countries can I recommend in such case

when you are going on a hustle, any country would do, yep even places like Irak etc.but as we can see that you want to go to a "funky" place, you should first let us know the following:
- how much money will you have available when you arrive there (wherever that may be)?
- have you ever hustled/lived on your own?
- what skills do you have?
- do you have the narrow minded foolish belief that in these places you can just plant money in your garden and water it, and the next day money will grow out of the ground?!
- WHY do you want to leave, really?

i suggest you choose a country where you have family or friends that will be able to support/guide you for a few weeks/months.

@believer01

A) for 7yrs you guys were seemingly happy with the r/ship you had... what status have you achieved today that makes you think that you must "upgrade" this r/ship to marriage?! do any of you guys have the GOOD JOB that you were dreaming about while dating for 7yrs?

B) sadly, many foolish Nigerians believe that having millions in their account will lead the way to a great union.....while we all know this is BS. it has all to do with 9ja men egos and how it will make them feel much better if they can (at least) AFFORD all the bs that comes with marrying someone in 9ja, aka expensive glitzy wedding to portray yourselves as a successful loving couple (even if they aint).

C) if you knew all along that he didnt believe in early marriage, why are you trying to change him now?

D) how often do you expect him to visit your family? shouldnt he do that whenever he feels like it?! he has already told you that he is going to do whats right "in due time", so you probably should stop trying to con/trick him into a corner with your family.

as for your questions:

1. should i wait till "forever" when he will be ready to discuss/ready for the marriage?

yes you should! dont you "LOVE" him?! you guys have already discussed the issue, so chill..... if you cant then you could always move on with your life with someone as desperate as you to get married.

2. i love him but now i have offers from different guys and i know the offers won't last forever(i have turn down 2 already). should i stay and pray he comes to his senses or leave him?

what you wrote above is a CLEAR indication that you have NO IDEA what love means.... so pls stop talking of what you do NOT know. if you loved your man, there is NO WAY you would have written the above stoopidity.

3. we are so closed to each other and understand each other so well that it will be difficult to understand anyone else like that.

so you understand him so well but yet dont understand why he asks you to wait until he will be ready for marriage?! why are you contradicting yourself? you dont understand the man because if you did, you wouldnt have opened this thread.

4. am not against him having millions of naira but "money is never enough" his friends that are not as okay as himself are getting married already.

then why dont you go and marry one of his friends?! lol! whether money is enough or NOT, is not the issue here....the issue is that it is his CHOICE, so stand by it, instead of comparing him with other people. you cant even stand by that man's choices and yet you are here talking about love and/or marriage. you have NO concept of what it takes to marry someone, especially when you are here comparing your lives with that of others.

5. am not trying to rush him into marriage but how am i to know i won't regret waiting until when he will be ready? what if he leaves me after the long wait?

oh lawd!!!!!! and you have the audacity to say you love the guy............. i guess its a selfish love where only your insecure self matters, right?

7years relationship now. plssss no insult we all do crazy things for love but we learn everyday and i believe this forum will give me the candid answer i seek

here is what you should do....... sit down, ask yourself what is the priority in your life TODAY, and if that man can give you what you desire TODAY. if he can then great, but if he cant then ask yourself if you can wait for it or not. if you cant wait for it then move on with your life and go marry the 1st donkey you will meet.

15thMonica:
India, Philippines

really?

Malta, kindly shed some light on how life is over dir..

i was just trying to give you places where they speak English, and therefore, where it would be easier for a Nigerian to settle/study etc
if you are going there to STUDY, then why should you care how life is there? you are going there to STUDY and thats all that matters. when you get you degree, you leave.

now, if you are looking for a place to ESCAPE Nigeria, through BS student visa then thats another question altogether.

these women from Venezuela are all part of a TV serie called GIVING THE NEWS NAKED, and they all give news naked.
you can see more of them directly on their website on www.dln.la

publicenemy:
Then the girl in question should be the fool.

dont get it twisted, if that guy had "unprotected" sex with such lady (as the examples i put up there) then he is equally a fool. he should never have had unprotected sex with such women.

publicenemy:
I don't understand this thread... I think every guy should accept if he gets a girl pregnant.especially if he loves her. If am in love with a girl and she tells me she is pregnant I'd be happy and prayin she'd love to keep it.

the important question you have to ask yourself IS: do all guys have unprotected sex with women they love?

- some guys out there have unprotected sex with women they just met the same night at the club
- some guys out there have unprotected sex with women they are only/simply using as sex mate
- some guys out there have unprotected sex with women they despise..... but konji is bastard
- some guys out there have unprotected sex with women who have unprotected sex with EVERYBODY
so as you can see, although a man may accept that he is the father of the child (after proper DNA testing), marrying that gal is OUT OF THE QUESTION!

15thMonica:
can u suggest a better one?

the expensive UK or USA ?

#noPon

so you actually think that France is cheaper?! also have you considered the language barrier?
you will be better off in an English speaking country, like Canada, Australia, Ireland, India, Philipines, Jamaica, Malta etc

MaziKachi:
Still doesnt answer my question.

here is the answer to your question about "miracles".....:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcpElp49nRE

i know about a great prophet who does fantastic miracles, his name is DAVID COPPERFIELD or better yet CRISS ANGEL.
miracles KO, walking on water NI!!!