₦airaland Forum

I would beat u back but you would probably enjoy it too much.

fstranger3:
^^^

Whats your problem?

If you were my wife, the probability that you'e be beaten is 1

If u were my husband I would beat myself.

Men are goats and don't listen until you walk away. The average woman leaves her abuser 8 times before finally cutting him off. The cycle of abuse only gets worse. Don't tell me BS about "He was so good for the first couple of years, and everything was sooo perfect". Examine your relationship and find tmes when he belittled you, put you down, made you feel like less of a person. Run away as fast as you can!!! Do you want to wait until you get married to him so that your children can see this coward putting his hand on you? Statistics show that boys often follow right in their abusive fathers' footsteps. At least 3 women in the US are killed every day by their so called lovers/boyfriends/husbands.

Are you going to allow yourself to be the next victim of a cowardly killer? Forget your wasted time and be greatful he didn't wait until you two were married before showing his true colors.

fstranger3:
You deserve it


If i were him, i'd do the same thing

Women are goats, they dont listen until you beat the shyyt out of them

MRbrownJAY:
@nekai
Lol ok mrs devils advocate:
A lie is a lie regardless of how why when or where it was delivered. If what was concealed was no biggie then they would have told the truth. That little piece of information would have saved OP a lot grief, money and probably embarrassment.

How can he ever trust her? How can he build a loving union when trust is gone out the window? How can he be a loving father when he hates mummy through his guts?

Well, you are right, he probably will never trust her fully again. The deceit in lying about the abortions are probably causing more grief than knowing she had abortions in the first place. I was going to give a senario in which the wife comes clean about the abortions after 10 years of marriage and 5 kids. I was going argue that the man wouldn't be as upset about it after 10 years of marital bliss.

However, what you say about trust is very important. If this had been a case of cheating, where the wife suspected her future husband was cheating with a specific girl before they got married and he denied it, I don't think the wife would ever trust him again, whether she finds out a few montrhs into the marriage, or 10 years. She will feel like a fool and also will question the husband's fidelity during the marriage.

Chaircover says it best when she say that they may want to consider counseling, because to dissolve a marriage shouldn't be taken lightly. The lack of trust is very difficult to overcome, but not impossible. 

MRbrownJAY:
@nekai
Are you claiming that lying is right?! It doesn't matter how many do it or for whatever reason: TO LIE TO YOUR PARTNER IS WRONG.

If I listen to you then if a gal aint a virgin and know damn well that her future husband will only marry a virgin, its ok to lie?
The OP wanted to know her sexual history because it was VERY important to him and the only reason she lied is because her hubby would have A) known she was a H O E B) probably not married her.

No, it's not ok to be dishonest. The OP suggested that some issues came up that caused her to confess, and it suggested fertility issues. Lying was dead wrong, but she doesn't have to be especially loose to have had this situation happen. The abortions could be from one or two guys. (It happens). If she lied about her virginity that is wrong in a whole other way, but he knew she was sexually active, and everytime a woman has sex there is a possibility of pregnancy. No pill, cream, patch, shot, or condom is 100% effective.

MRbrownJAY:
Is having a child gonna erase the shame of being duped in marrying the neighborhood skank?!

What if the neighborhood skank is now reformed? Many loose girls were once victims of sexual abuse, causing them to make unwise decisions before they 'saw the light'.



(I'm playing devil's advocate here )

OAM4J:
You applied too late Dayo.

The plan is for Uju to marry one very rich money-miss-road showing interest on her now, after which she will retire form her work and be a liability wife.

2 years down the line, she will divorce the man make Millions$$$$ from him , marry me and we'll both be liability husband and wife till death do us part or till the money finishes (which ever happens 1st)

LOL!

Let's look at the situation as if the abortions are not the cause of her fertility issues. I will explain why in a min.

OP, I think she is dead wrong for concealing her past from you, especially when you asked her. However, (and I could be dead wrong here) not everyone discloses the exact nature of everything that they have been through in the past. I'm sure you haven't told your wife about every single woman you have been with, and if you have, I'm sure you didn't tell her how "sweet" this one was, or how many of them were great lovers, or how many of them you cheated on back in your young days. Even if your wife asked you if 'Samantha' was better in the bedroom, I'm sure you wouldn't say, "Oh yeah!" even if it happened to be true, likewise, if you ask your wife if you are the best lover she has ever had, you don't expect her to say no.

Although I am personally pro-life, I can understand how overwhelmed she must have felt when she made the choice to have an abortion. I don't know why she would put herself in the situation so many times, but she was probably just being young and silly. Everyone has skeletons in their closet, some may not be as bad as others. She may have changed her life around and didn't want her past being used against her. Which brings me to the issues of fertility.

Do you know that stress can prevent a couple from conceiving? Many couples struggling with problems in this area consult many doctors, even turning to fertility specialists, and adoption only to give up and fall pregnant soon thereafter. It's possible that this could be your wife's problem. She may be feeling so much guilt about her past it may be causing her body too much stress. Your wife is feeling a great deal of pressure now. She conceived those other times when she least expected it, so she wasn't stressed out at the time.

You guys should go get all the fertility testing done and find out if this is a physical problem or a psychological one. If it's not a physical problem, then just support her, and trust that she wasn't trying to decieve you. Now that she doesn't have to be scared of being found out, with your love and support she may relax enough to let nature take it's course.

SEFAGO:
Those guys are daft. They must be AA.

Just curious, what was the methodology-

Size, shape (concentric, banana-like, Pole) , and hope you took race into your statistical analysis. Its not fair to compare say Indian men to AA men. Its kind of like an apples to oranges kind of comparison

I don't know where most of the girls were from. I wasn't there. I don't drink (which the drinking probably played a part in the madness), and like I told my cousin, I would never ever do something like that. I don't think any guys that are in my phone would actually send me a pic, and if they did they would probably want something in return, or think I was whorish for asking. [quote author=ekt_bear link=topic=645677.msg8123105#msg8123105 date=1302761605]Haha. That is pretty hilarious I'm a bit surprised though. . . I assume they texted dudes they kind of know, or were involved with somewhat in the past? Cannot be coworker/some dude from class, right?

Otherwise. . . kind of weird. Then again, most dudes will do anything if they think there will be some poon at the end of it[/quote]One of my cousins pics was from an ex and the other from a long time friend. The ex lives out of the country now. She told him what it was for and he was ok with sending the pic., But the bad thing is he wanted to talk to some of the girls, which resulted in a BB pin exchange and my cousin wasn't too happy about it. The friend is now thinking she wants to be intimate with him. (I told her it was a silly thing to do.)

[quote author=ekt_bear link=topic=645677.msg8123045#msg8123045 date=1302760459]They probably don't use #s or anything like that, tho? Just "Hot", "cute", etc? [/quote]Lol, let me tell you what my cousin and a group of 5 her friends did the other day. They were all sitting around hanging out and drinking. Someone came up with the brilliant idea to see who could get the most 'dik pics'. They frantically text messaged guys asking them to send a pic of their member. Between the 6 girls they came up with 18 'dik pics'. My cousin actually got two and I think the winner got 5 or 6. They rated the pics from 1-10 as they came in.

I think women are more likely to rate guys when we are in group settings.

jay bee:
u haven't answered the OP's question
Do you?

It depends. . . I don't think certain guys are in my league, but it's not ususally because of physical things. More like, if a guy approaches me and he is blasting certain music in his car, I know that we will not have very many things in common.

kandiikane:
nekai,are you Igbo?

Maybe. Or maybe I'm Yoruba. Or maybe AA. Or maybe an obese 60 year old white guy.  (Singing: I'll never tell. . .)  

[quote author=ekt_bear link=topic=645677.msg8122963#msg8122963 date=1302759183]I think it should be mandatory on this forum for everyone to have YIM

Since there is no private messaging  

Oga Seun badly needs to upgrade his forum software. . . this is an outrage[/quote]Imagine the insults that I would miss out on learning? I heard a guy on here call someone a moronic bush-piglet once.  

Pweety4me:
[color=#550077]These are not men sweetie, or the rather their women are 'products' [/color]

:p

:p

:p

TheCongo:
The black guy had brought this case to court NOT because he was ignored by the white guy but mostly because he believes HR had mishandled the case. As a matter of fact, the black guy is deeply sorry for his misdeed and he had even tried to reach out to the white guy to apologize.  Nevertheless, this doesn’t let HR off the hook.

But in his case, the black guy’s apprehension of racism is met with “You can’t call someone a racist without proof”

The black guy is in court because he believes that he had been a victim of subtle discrimination.

Nairaland, let go back again to the black guy original question “Is it because I am black that you are ignoring me”
Do you think that this question was unwarranted?

Yes, the question was unwarranted. He could have been ignoring him for a multitude of reasons. There was nothing to gain from asking the question. If the white guy isn't racist, then he will feel very offended, and upset because the black guy is trying to pull 'the race card'. If the white guy is racist, then he can still pretend to be shocked and offended and since he never said anything to the black guy that could be considered racist, then he will get the sympathy of his colleagues, racist ones and even ones that are not racist since they would hate to be misunderstood.

Will the black guy win in court? Probably.

So, because of biology, women are 'ready' earlier and earlier, and because of the financial crisis men are 'ready' later and later.

OgaMadam- I have a serious question for you. . . . I'm inquiring about something you posted a while back, and I wanted to know what the outcome was.

LOLOL!!!

PhysicsMHD:


Here's some Naija c[i]o[/i]ck, like you asked for:







































Stick that in your mouth for a while and you'll calm down and stop snapping at me.


Notice the green white and green.



[size=4pt]shameless ho [/size]

Deal!

[quote author=Inked_Nerd link=topic=637722.msg8111752#msg8111752 date=1302627855]Oya, pass him over when your done. In fact, direct me to any male relative he may have who are like him. What country is this man from anyway? Hopefully i can go find his countrymen and see if there are more like him [/quote]

peelovee:
You are 100% correct.

My experience
I took postonor 2 within 24hrs of unprotected sex,  expecting to get 95% efficacy.
After 2 weeks there was nothing like mentral cycle, since it Curtail/prolong MC i was having the full assurance that my MC must surely come. After one month there was nothing like MC so i decided to go for PT, I was shocked when the  Doctor confirmed that I was 4weeks pregnant .

Please avoid POSTONOR 2, GO 4 GOLD CYCLE .

I read recently that a study showed that girls are maturing earlier and earlier, with 1 in 5 AA girls reaching puberty by age 7. Can you imagine the implications? By 18 years old these women will be biologically feel ready to settle down, maybe menopause will come by 28. 

Many women only see their gynaecologist once a year for a checkup. Many women go only when are having 'problems'. So if you are getting turned on by warts, herpes blisters, yeast infections, and focal place lice, something would be very wrong.

jaephoenix:
Look dude,am a doc practising for 6 yrs.i ll b honest wit u
I have been sexually excited while examining a womans only twice.as in my snake was straining against its cage.n d ladies were enjoying it(one was a bosom exam n d other was a womanly.there could b some Hot chicks).

Jaephoenix, was this you? 

"Gynaecologist gave patient two heavenly feelings in under two minutes"
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/6817680/Gynaecologist-gave-patient-two-orgasms-in-under-two-minutes.html

This guy is taking advantage of your vulnerability, which he can smell from a mile away.

Sure! The man can stay home wash the clothes, do the dishes, clean the kitchen, scrub the toilets, scrub the floors, was the linens, make the beds, and cook the food. He can watch ESPN while doing some of these things. Then the wife can come home to paradise. I'm sure many women wouldn't mind.

dayokanu:
The women that work also go to gym, get their hairs done, Do their laundry somehow, get grocery and food for their family somehow

True, but then she is more stressed out. She could transform into the dreaded "Nagging Wife" if she starts finding it difficult to cope. Maybe not. Many women are Superwoman and manage to handle it all!

“Is it because I am black that you are ignoring me?”

Does this question insinuate the black guy was referring to the white guy as a racist?

My answer is yes.

What he should have said was "Is there any special reason that you only ignore me?"

Your attitude determines your aptitude, so now even though it's possible that the white guys was racist (especially if he would respond to everyone elses greetings), the black guy was unprofessional by engaging the white guy and HR in a heated argument. The white guy and HR have no reason to be very upset, so it seems the black guy was the aggressor.

Thus, reinforcing the 'Angry Black Man' stereotype, and giving the white guy validation that he was right to ignore the black guy in the first place. I hate to see black people reinforce racist stereotypes because it makes it harder for the rest of us.

Blazay:
Heeeeeeeeeeeellll Nooooooooooooo!!!

I can sit on my bed and be a better lover than any man by 'doing' ma-self with ma fingers or 'dil-dee-oh'. . .so why go woo a man to be my lover?
In this 21st century?


Never have and never will.
You have to 'warm' me up to get my attention.
I may flirt with you or engage in phone/cyber sexing. . .

It does not mean I wanno woo ya.
You really have to make me know how bad you wannit!

According to the gospel of Jimmy Cliff. . .

You can gerrit if you really want. . . but you must try. . .try and try! Period!




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18EAqHx2lMk&feature=related

LOL!
(Btw u and your hubby are a match made in heaven!  )

dayokanu:
When the kids are in school from 8am to 3pm what would you be doing at home?

Part time employment, Laundry and dry cleaning, Cooking, going to the gym, getting hair done, house cleaning, grocery shopping, ect. I'm sure it would be nice not to have to do these things after work, because you could spend more time with the hubby and more time with the kids instead of running around town and the house trying to get everything done after work.

Can you picture the scene: You come home after a hard day's work, open the door and you are met with the aroma of a nice meal, the sight of an immaculately clean home, a wife that looks relaxed and children that look happy, maybe waiting for daddy to help with some homework.

Now try to picture the opposite senario: You come home to a cold empty house, maybe slightly disheveled since there was a rush to get everyone out the house in time this morning. Your wife stumbles in the door with an arm full of groceries, The kids run in and scatter, your wife starts to straighten up so dinner can be prepared, she is thinking of the deep house cleaning that needs to be done, the load of laundry that she will be putting in while dinner is on the stove. The hair appointment that is long overdue.  In this senario the kids are not old enough to help yet, so they are being normal kids and getting in the way, maybe frazzling your wife.

My point is that it there are things for a stay at home mom to do. For some women, they would prefer the interaction and the satisfaction from full-time employment. In some families it works out better becasue with both parents working full time, the family can have a better financial situation. Many working women have their lives organized much better than the wife in the second senario.

**I am totally against the assertion that a husband can 'not allow' their wife to go to work. The stay at home life isn't for everyone.**