₦airaland Forum

FriedPlantain:
I once tried using my phone to send a mail to my boss to confirm the receipt of xx million naira in our bank account from one of our major customers. I was really astonished when I uncharacteristically received a call from my boss minutes later demanding what "plantains" was doing in the company's bank account.
apparently Mr Itk autocorrect deemed it fit to change million to plantain for me.


Friedplaintain

and u think u got an autocorrect?...trust me, na autowrong dey ur device...

tchidi:

Baba, if you go like take Kunun gyeda, tamba, gero, dawa or even Zobo, ka kira waya na!

me kake cewa hala?...An ce ya kan sha coke,fanta da ruwa kawai...kana cewa wata abu...smh

#BabaWhyDidYouEat #BewareOfPoisons
#AishaWhyDidn'tYouCome #BewareOfSuspicion

Emptybrain:
Do you wana date him, i got his contacts?

too much preference to NL baes...who are they sef?...Imagine this guy am mentioning...if he likes any NL bae,what's the biggie coming straight to her...
Must you guys always seek their attention on every post...I can only imagine you were expecting some girls to comment on this post....like ur getting paid for it...shii!

Snake warriors

segtak25:
source : http://streetgist.com/cartoon-the-real-reason-kashamu-won/

in indonesia,they don't need fuel...they need gun!

Eberex:
We all know how Naija higher institutions are, especially when it comes to female students seducing male lecturers. Well not in all cases because the lecturers themselves are guilty of threatening a female student unless she sleeps with him. And i ends in fornication.

On the other hand we have pastors. Well i will call most fake. These are people who meet female members of the church whether it is for special anointing or breakthrough, and most times it ends up with either the pastor getting seduced or him initiating it. Whichever the case, it ends up with the same result. fornication.

These two professions are somewhat similar because these daughters of eve comes to them with their problems, hoping to get answers, but my question is: of the two professions which is the lesser evil?

And to their wives, i always wonder how they deal with these issues knowing fully well the dangers their husbands are facing at their work places. Either they accept it or find ways to curb it by monitoring or close-marking them or being with them ( this is easy for the pastor's wives ). But personally i think lecturers are more at risk especially those in the social sciences.

What's your take?

lecturers of course...they see the temptations virtually everyday...

JoeCutie:
I open doors; that's all.

I almost hate it when a lady opens doors herself while I'm with her. I'm so good at that. I mean if that's the criterion for the attainment of heaven, I'd be the Senate President of Heaven.

in fact you must be a potential gate keeper...

saaedlee:
Straight to the point, my HoD retired and a new one was transferred from a south-south state to take his position earlier this month. The problem is new boss is a young girl of about 30 years and during our first meeting, we stared @ each other for almost 5 minutes straight without saying "hi" nor "hello"! During the first week we would steal glances when the other wasn't watching.
My first field assignment under her command went smoothly that she put in a commendation for me and offered to buy me a drink to celebrate it, during the course of our drink she told me everything about her self and I fell in-love with her from that moment. Ever since, we cannot stay a day without seeing each other, apart from office hours, we have also coded it that no one in the office knows bout it; tho the service doesn't prohibit it!

Should I call it off or should I continue?

cc: Babyosisi, Falconey, eroticangelica etc

call it off and get fired...continue and be the silent boss...enjoy man!

RobinHez:
then just laugh

so your telling us the OP is a liar plus he's not smart enough...

nairation:
if you ask me...na who i go ask?

ask your source ofcus...or make you go ask Glo or etis whr dem dey see their own diesel...

bigproff:
In Ur own time, u meet d modern kind of it wia we draw d pitch on a white paper and tap d boton ball with a biro cover on d pitch

so in ur own time,there was tiles?...how old are u sef?

nairation:
Guys oya ooo...

it is happening..

first it was BEAT99.9 FM now MTN too will join soon

why mtn? Other networks get diesel stations or engage in bunkery?

crixlight2:
Where are the village boy like me... gone are the days

Once be a champion in our street
Like if you play this very well

we play on paper not tiles...

I would think the HR's mum sells akara...

No electricity,you can't charge your car,even if you would use gen,you must need fuel...so basically, your electric car is useless without fuel....

rightthing276:
If this # tag thing can be achieved, I'm sure it wud go a long way to help the suituation. Pls I'm not on twitter but I'd be glad if u guys can help me achieve this. #Access Bank fufil your promises to The Project ART DSAa. If dat can work

Taking to twitter right away....

#AccessBankFulfilOurPromises #ARTDSAsCryOut

olasmith10:
we should just create an hastag and expose dis heartless idiots called bank ceos...even if the economy is so bad. u shouldn't promise what u can't offer..

#WhyIsAccessBankLying

And they still need more people to use and dump...10mins recruitment...Maybe their fathers would apply...awon oloriburuku...

Sirolad:
gnld

u sef sabi dem

Sequel to your application to the HR, you are scheduled for an interview on WED 20th MAY, by 8AM at Zeoplus, 16 Akinremi str, New Garage, Ikeja. 0802-226-2505

There could be another Bode...why the clueless and rushy conclusion?
Angry mobs and lynchy justice sha

Setting down the camera like you were expecting the accident...#swiftcapture

Oluwabunmy:
Ve being tryin to log in since d 2nd day bt fortunately for me I got logged in d 4th day ...I entered wt my yahoomail acct n d question dey asked was" wat s d name of d cloth u wear to bed.....d option was Suit sleek,Pajamas,dress,suit,pyjamas...I picked Pyjamas n dey said ts wrong,.so I quickly log in wt anoda acct n dey asked same question n I picked Pajamas.....dey said am successful so dey took me to anoda stage n a msg was sent afta all dt dey wil get back to me.........dt was all about d test stuf

u smart...na to register with anoda acc sure pass nw...cos I was also a victim of both pyjamas and inferno questions...I even thought they were goina ask me that pyjamas que again d followg day,I go jus close eyes click pajamas...well,I dey wait for dem tomao sha...

Ask4bigneyo:
I was able to apply using Mozilla Firefox....I logged in to d site @ exactly 9:58 waiting for the count down time to finish..
i was able to log in with my e-mail add n phone nos....
A qstn pop-up and it goes thus:
What is the name given to the cloth u put on if u wanna go to bed @ nyt...
a. Pajamas
b. blanket
c. cant remember
d. ditto to c
e. pyjamas
if u choose d ryt ans, u wil see ur result instanta n a link to proceed to d next stage bt if u choose d wrong ans, u wil be given d chance to try again after 24 hours...
once u r able to scale tru d 1st n d 2nd stage, u r free to login at any point in time to complete ur data...
just 6 stages.
NOTE: The job is for 24yrs below wit 2.1..bt there is a link to applicant above 24 also just dt d chances of inviting dem for an interview is nt too certain...
I dd mine n my two frnds @ a go by using diff pages bt same qstn.
Thanks to Mozilla ,my mini lappy n etisalat ntwk.

for that very question...I chose "pyjamas",they said I was wrong....the following day I retried..they asked "which of the following relates to fire"? From the options I could see "Inferno" which I chose and yet I was still wrong...And that has actually kept me wondering as to why they kept rejecting the right answer choice...and funny enough,I think one can only retry twice after the first try...

sirr:
My brov, its almost everywhere, I've lost 3 r-ships all because of same reason, but I know soon, we'll find our best companion. Thanks bro, and One love

op,why now?...you have been truthful and straightforward all the way...why did you just lie?...you could have just told him "those shii happen,and not saying they happen ALMOST everywhere"...does that make him celibate?

ekiloui:
1.) Some women have very low libido
2.) Some feel that's how it should be (I.e the husband should always be the one to ask for it)
3.) Some think it makes them more desirable ( the more they hide it the more the man needs it)

The truth though is that as women we have a duty to satisfy our spouse, if he needs it simply give it to him except of course you have a reasonable excuse (e.g your period, fatigue, illness etc). And also you should be able to ask your husband for it too...men also like to feel desired, don't think you're the only one who wants to feel attractive, your husband will feel attractive whenever you ask, so stroke his ego.

If you want to hoard... Prepare for your husband to start playing away match.

this is the men's spokeswoman...you so nailed it!...trust me,without seeing ur dp,I love you...

Short Conversation Between Father & Daughter:

•DAUGHTER : Dad, My fiance is a hausa man.

•FATHER : God forbid! Boko haram people!? Nooo!

•DAUGHTER : He's Dangote's son.

•FATHER : Ahhhhhh, no problem, we are all Nigerians.

oluamid:
The OP says Burns boy doesn't show off.

What is he doing now?

he's not showing off,he's off showing!

agarawu23:
nice one rapmoney.

I am in support of your write up But I want us to look it from another angle.

I am not in support of a young hustling guy spending lavishly on a Lady he is yet to marry but that doesn't mean he should not fall in love.(he should apply sense)

If he finally forget about ladies, chase his dream and later succeed, how will he find true love ? (no be our girls of nowadays? Ferrari things )

What if the guy is not destined to be rich? I am sure he will still settle down with one (though she might not be his dream girl)

We have few ladies who don't care if a guy is rich or poor, all they want is true love (bros I still dey find them o )

mother to son
Son: how do I find a right woman for myself
Mother: be a right man and the right woman finds you
Moral: be successful and you'd find your woman effortlessly.
On a deviant note,how would you know if it's true love or money love? Be the bad guy every girl likes and she would feel a thing for you if it was money love, and loves you more if it was true love...

niceguy7:
Ladies and money, be like bread and butter.

confidence is BAMA

Your appearance most times gives the first impression followed by your confidence. And sometimes,the confident approach would come off as a turn on regardless of what your putting on....so,basically,confidence is the key.