₦airaland Forum

Ghost01:
Nigerians and our attitude sha. There is nothing wrong with what Mr Mohammed said. He is only talking about the potentials of the country in terms of tourism. I must admit that the masquerade example he gave is quite funny, but then we can't throw away the baby with the water. And if the masquerades turn into big business, those dressing them will surely get paid for their troubles. Seasonal employment, yes, but employment all the same.

You cannot plan tourism without safety and infrastructure. So I'll be in a village in Enugu, taking pictures of dancing masquerades and Fulani Herdsmen attack. Or I'll fly into Benin City with my family to watch a festival and guess what, chronic fuel scarcity, my budget cannot cover the new hikes prices of transport. The only state that can reasonably do festivals is Lagos state because they use public holidays to provide free buses for people to watch them and it's relatively safe. South American countries with a high crime rate make sure they keep it down during events where tourists come or they isolate the tourist areas (example: Mexico, horrendous crime and corruption rate and a bustling tourist centre far from the crime-ridden cities). Nigeria doesn't have that yet.

Stop liking my comment and help me please! If you had seen my darling on that horse, you'd have cried tears of pride, she looked so pretty!! So graceful and elegant. It was a white mare too, just like a Khaleesi. I'd post pictures but it would break Nairaland from its sheer awesomeness and Seun won't like that.

Please come to my aid. I use Access Bank account, nothing is too small

Abeg I need help: my 10 month old baby likes horseriding and she looks fantastic doing it. We are determined that she will marry Prince George of Britain and you know English people like hunting and horseriding. We need to buy Baby E a pony and it will cost several millions of Naira to maintain it (horses and grooming are freaking expensive and eating grass is for poor horses). I'm asking for your help, nairalanders. No amount is too little, help my daughter be great, help her be the first Black Queen of England!

No amount is too little, please donate generously. Can I post my account number please?

otokx:
Some comments on this thread made me to laugh out loud.

Nigerians know how to yab ehn.

The man is saying that Tourism is big business; look beyond the masquerade.

I'm a huge fan of Tourism and Culture as a business but this is all shades of wrong. Example, most of the SE masquerades are not danced in the cities but in the villages. Would you in this time of Fulani Herdsmen, willingly take your kids to a village in Enugu to watch this festival? Most of the Rhinoceros are in Benue, but will you take your parents around there in these times of Fulani Herdsmen? Manbilla Plains in Jos is gorgeous, but can you see yourself peacefully booking a ticket to fly toJos, not knowing if a religious riot may break out anytime? Even Osogbo Festival that is relatively safe, how has Lai Mohammed promoted it?

There are a million ideas he could have said and not sounded like a f00l.

I voted Buhari because Osinbanjo has so much to offer, if only Buhari would step back and chase corruption and leave running the country to the VP! Not for this rubbish. Buhari's govt sounds more and more elitist ("if you can't afford it, don't aspire to a better life, like us" seems to be their mantra).

Hmm i just realised I'm speaking too much English but you understand shebi?

A dunghill co.ck is a rooster, very proud of himself, crowing like a lion (forgetting he's a chicken) and ignoring the fact that he is standing on top of a pile of poo. When your pride outstrips your reality. Also.known as the King of the Jungle in Ajegunle.

Example: Kanu Nwankwo in his single days,used to drive a white Escalade (which was once an expensive car). He came to see some chics. 2 guys on the queue waiting for public tranport (whom he had done absolutely nothing to) began to insult the girls and talk smack about Kanu Nwankwo and his car. I repeat, the guys were waiting for danfo. Now, i hope those guys bought cars in their future, but they're still not Kanu Nwankwo.

There are several dunghill co.cks in this Nairaland

Acidosis:
I still maintain my stance that MONEY is not enough reason to switch roles. I'd gladly shift roles for better reasons like ILLNESS, PREGNANCY, etc. I can be anything, I could cook and even knee to beg a 10 year old girl, but what I won't do is to become a slave to MONEY.

The heavy weight dude you described may be lost in love. As you rightly said, he's successful, so all he did wasn't based on the fact that his girlfriend his wealthy and 'too big' to clean or cook for herself.

We shouldn't allow temporary circumstances dictate stuffs like ROLES. What if the said man bounces back tomorrow? To the extent that he gets too busy to even spend a day in 1 full month with his family? Should he be a slave to his job/money, or put his family FIRST?

Btw, I've never addressed idle men in any of my posts. I only talked about men who earn less. Some people are actually ALWAYS busy, but they earn little. I could name 3 notable companies in Nigeria, especially in the insurance sector, who have not paid any salary since January, 2016. These firms have married men working day and night, yet without pay. I don't think it is right to treat such men the way y'all suggested.

Some work-at-home folks earn more than the corporate guys. So it shouldn't be a factor of MONEY. The one who has more spare time can help out with tedious tasks in the home. I don't like it when we place too much emphasis on money.

It's not only about money. Those family guys who haven't been paid in 5 months, will be treated as how they earned it: those who were kind in the time of plenty should expect kindness (and I as a woman will fight their wives on their behalf if I hear she's not supporting him). Those who treated their wives like chattel in their time of plenty, please, you made your bed, now take your pillow and lie on it. Earning less is not a crime, earning less and acting like a Dunghill Co.ck, well you deserve whatever humble-pie-eating faceplant you get.

pcguru1:
What do mean by feminine roles am curious ?

You define it. Any role that comes to your mind and you immediately feel "that's a girl's job", that a feminine role to you.

I can't read minds.

Acidosis:
Feminists like you expects that as soon as a woman earns more than her husband, the man (who y'all consider as weakling) should immediately pick up the culinary, washing, dishing and sweeping roles. This cannot be considered as societal pressure. It is evil based on a lustful and uncontrollable desire and love of MONEY. It is a breach of marital contract. Why switch roles when you're in already?

Eh, you messed it up right here. Why shouldn't she expect it? If a man's traditional role is to provide and a woman's role is to nurture, why are women suddenly carrying the burden of providing? There is no escaping a woman's role but why do women have to also assume the men's role and play her traditional part? You can't eat your cake and have it. Either she's a nurturer or she's a provider but to expect her to be both whilst you get a break and play "Da Man", dude that's just selfishness.

The sad thing is that most of the females you guys get your pants in a bunch, are actually not feminists. They usually just want people to be treated right, be they male or female. But when you take the above stance and then expect some sympathy, no-one cares.

Why is it that a nurturing role is seen as subordination, when did Nurturing become a shameful and degrading thing that guys now use it to look down upon people?

If you knew how much easier life was when you say "get lost" to societal pressure is, you'd let go. I won't mind a man who cries, sadness let's me know that you need me because all is not well.

If you meet your spouse or a girl and say "I'm worried and tired. It's hard to be a superman and sometimes I'm scared I will fail and not impress you", if she's a good person, she will support you. But you have to support her. Let go of all these daft notions about how you, as a man, are supposed to act and be you: if you're gentle be firm and gentle, if you're strong be kind and strong. Be you because God didn't give you the personality you have, just so you could deny thyself and act like an Bullying Arse.

I posit it that it's because you're constantly fighting your natural self that you're depressed and unhappy. In your quest to keep up appearances, your misery shines through.

I've never met a man who died from assuming some feminine roles. In fact, to fight desperately against is a sign of a man who is unsure of himself. I know a man who the first day he went to his gf's house, he vacuumed. He does dishes and she sits (after cooking). He's one of the most secure men I've ever met and very educated too. He's masculine (dude is a heavyweight and fights mixed martial arts) and successful. He's content in himself because he gave up worrying about what the world defines for him at every stage in his life (he's black, not physically attractive as a young man, started from the bottom).

cococandy:
he couldn't just answer

Some posters on this forum are plain ridiculous.
Even when the answer is staring them in the face.

I guess there's no situation where it's okay for a woman to leave her marriage. Even in the face of death, she's supposed to sit fold her arms and wait to be killed.
Yeye things.

M'dear...

Domestic Violence is NOT ABOUT ANGER, it is about CONTROL. They are not hitting you because they are angry, they are beating you up because they have lost control and they feel that is the best way to exert it back upon you.

One lady commented on one of these blogs that her husband would punch her for replying him so her pastor advised her to keep quiet and walk away. The next fight happened and she kept shut and walked away rather than exchange words. Her husband picked a chair and smashed it on her back, screaming "how dare you ignore me". Even in silence, the abuser will slap you and say you were using your silence to mock him (I've seen it happen and the next thing you know, the victim tried to leave the room and she was knocked down and being choked whilst we tried to save her). And once the victim of Domestic Violence tries to leave, the abuser immediately does his best to make her stay: either with apologies or threats.

If it were truly about Anger, the abuser would be beating up even a stranger over a trivial matter. But we know that does not happen often. If it were truly about disliking bad habits or being tired of the victim, the abuser would be relieved when the victim leaves. But we know that the abuser tends to fight against that happening. We see, time and time again, that the abuser is described as a "nice guy" outside the family unit and we erroneously think that perhaps it is the victim's fault. Nope.

Abusive people are manipulative and will do all they can to isolate their victim against the world. All in a bid to control them even more and when they cannot control their victim, resort to violence.

Domestic Violence is never about Anger, it is about Control.

Zaynie, thank you. This is why I don't us like stating names of meds here because people will go the pharmacy and buy it without checking to see first if they are treating the illness or the symptoms of the illness. You may end up treating just the symptoms of that cough or cold but have no idea what caused it in the first place and it will keep coming back. Doctors are not infallible but at least it is a start. God gave Mankind brains and intelligence to develop Modern Medicine. A pharmacist is not a doctor even though they went to med school. Most pharmacists I know actually don't like prescribing medicine sef.

You're not going about this the right way. I would send you a proposal on what to do and how to package yourself but those cost money. So let me give you free advice: rethink the way you're selling your business.

ice4u999:
You I feel so sorry for a lot of Nigerians that threw their money into time shares with the thought that they were investing. I know a lot of people that have benefited from time shares but that Dubai own is the worst money grabbing skim ever. First, you are only allowed to stay in the hotel for only 3 weeks in a year after paying millions to buy that time shares and then the maintainance fee is ridiculously high. Shoo 700 US dollars for a month is equivalent to 3 nights stay in a good hotel in Dubai. There why will somebody pay almost 8400 dollars to maintain a place you can only stay for 2-3 weeks. This don't make any sense. Time shares in the states makes more sense becos most are cheap to maintain and they have so many other affiliated hotels in the world one could use as a suppliment. I knew their game as soon as they approach my wife and I at the airport and we went to their office becos my wife wanted to take a picture close to the tallest hotel in the world ( free cab ride) and free ticket to a boat dinner. But boy the Lebanese man was angry becos he could not get us to invest our money and their cab man dropped us half in the middle of Dubai but who cares it was all fun to us being our first time in Dubai.

They are all flocking to Nigeria offering all sorts of time-shares and holiday packages around the world. They got my FiL to pay millions for one that he has never used. One of these companies approached hubby and I and invited us for their meeting. Halfway through, I just started telling him to forget it. Paying so much to maintain something you can't use well. It's much more sensible to get a time-share in a location you like to travel to a lot (a cousin has a time-share in Marbella and I'd like to join that) and when you have a proper schedule (no joining a timeshare when your kids don't have a proper school calendar or your work isn't regular and routine).

d33types:
meanwhile,most of Nairalanders don't know what time sharing means.

it's a method of partly owning houses for only a specific time.the time could be just 2weeks,meaning for every 2weeks in the year, different persons own the houses.this means that a house can be used by 26 persons a year.

i believe it wan not intended for scam initially.

Business just got awry because of greed..

Thank you. Most of them don't know this. Time-shares exist in several countries and is a cheaper way to take holidays. The people who got scammed are average earners or middle income people. So why you guys are laughing at people who got scammed of their hard-earned money, I don't know.

HaneefahRN:
Let me sha book space here.

How much will you sell the space please?

But I don't understand: why is a lawyer contacting Ifedayo, Freeze, about Tiwa Savage? Is Ifedayo her manager or representative? Is there any SAN that is this hungry (SAN is not for small boys o, all the SANs I know are rich men who handle big cases).

creamyzone:
Vex ke. Why will I be angry. I only replied to your comment because you thought it was an ordinary chemist. My sister calm down please and how can you say I should ignore your comment. You later added to the comment I quoted. We all came to learn here. And as I noted in my post that this is my first time on this thread so I expect you to be more patient ehn.

There's a paste that can mixed from some leaves that will help with the skin (i can't remember it but Red acalypha is one of the ingredients). Griseofulvin can be taken for a while because Ringworm takes time to clear. A doctor should be able to tell you how long to give it for. Antifungal shampoo can help clear the skin but won't treat the ringworm and neither will creams. Bleach her comb and wash anything fabric she had come in contact with. Dont share her towel and there's no need to cut her hair. A pharmacist really shouldn't be prescribing (my sibling always tells me to check with the Doctor before I take her advice) but if you wanna do that, it's your choice.

I'm going to quote an old post from 2013 from another mama on this thread:

sweettweet:
I was advised by a consultant paed @ BMH in PH not to use piccan for baby. She said the long term effect is terrible for baby.

That's why I advise that we search for answers. So you can get the full conversation on all sides.

creamyzone:
She is a trained pharmacist from a reputable university. The chemist man is just the front cashier that works for her. Ampiclox was prescribed by the same pharmacist when her eyes was swollen during teething and it worked and cleared in two days. I am not a fan of hospitals really as long as its not malaria or any feverish conditions. Even "baby centre", a renowned american website said you can consult your pharmacist for certain drugs. I came here just to hear out other mums that may have experienced similar condition...

Ah, sorry no vex. I merely asked a dermatologist, a pharmacist and consultant paeditrician because we were gisting online. Please ignore my comment.

Original comment modified by me.

For heat rashes, rather than using powder (i actually bought Agnesia powder based on all pf your recommendations here. It's good but don't fling it all over your baby, rather please pour in hand, pat together and gently press it into baby's skin, avoiding nose and mouth). Please UnCloth baby all through the day, give towel baths with rapid water or put baby in bathtub (or big bowl) with water to play or go swimming (very recommended for babies). Also, soak a washcloths in cool water and give baby to suck on. Helps their gums. The bad side effect of all that water is that baby will really like pouring water everywhere so that instead of drinking their water, they will pour it on the carpet, inside the DSTV box, on the bed, on the chair, on your phone...

It's a sad case, even her child knew what was going on was wrong.

EgunMogaji:
You don't know what I believe and neither do you even have the capacity to process my thoughts.

It's also not my job to educate you.

If you have a sane and lucid opinion to make, then please make it within antagonizing and shove off.

EgunMogaji:
Unless you have a court order granting you full custody then madam you kidnapped your kids. Why have kids with a man that abuses you?

Just think of the children and what's best for them rationally.

I dunno, maybe it's just me sha, but if someone is pouring petrol over you to burn you, the rational thing to do is to leave with your children. But I'm sure you believe there's a better solution for a situation such as this. I know, why not share it with us!

Go on...

supermum01:
Morning mamas. For those mamas battling wt their LO's cough here's a recipe my grandma tought me which is very very effective nd would clear d cough in 3 days. Dat was wat I used 4 my LO after d hopital prescription no work. D ingredient ar bitter leaf, lemon and honey. Squeeze out d bitter leaf juice and lemon juice and add honey den mix very well and start giving a teaspoon morning nd night do not refrigerate if after 3 days d cough no go add small palm oil. To d mixture and giv once daily. HTH

Honey is raw and cannot be pasteurized. Sometimes it can carry Botulism. Which can sometimes kills babies. So no doctor in the world will recommend it to a baby under the age of 12 Calendar months or 1 year. A mum in this group came out and stated that she lost her child to Botulism in honey. It does not matter how pure or how clean the honey is, it carries Botulism and is fatal in attacking babies.

Please I would like to mention something quickly about all this "my baby is swallowing this-and-that medication" especially Paracetamol, Ibruprofen, antibiotics, Acetaminophen and most cold and cough syrups:

Please stop it. You are building up a drug resistance in your child (which means that one day very soon, maybe at the age of 5, your child will require very strong medications to treat a minor ailment) and that happens especially in Antibiotics. Doctors complain a lot about parents abusing drugs especially Antibiotics. The same goes with painkillers of any sort. You are harming your child's kidneys with consistent dosing of painkillers, even if you give the right dosage, as long as you give it for a prolonged time, you are endangering their kidneys. Same with Antifungal or Antibacterial (steriod) creams, you're removing the upper epidermis (top layer of their skin). There is a reason that day on the back of medications "after 3 days, consult your doctor".

Speak to your doctor and if you see no improvement after a certain number of days, go back and tell for doctor and if you're not satisfied, get a 2nd opinion from another doctor.

Neverquit:
Guys, biko, remove the thoughts of cheating from your mind. It is very disrespectful. And yes, some women have mastered the act of cheating that you will never have an inclination talk less of catching them.

How high are the chances that the apprentice the OP's brother was sleeping with is a member of her church choir or teaches in children's church and has a steady boyfriend

The last 2 (the Brophyllum) is more commonly known as a Kalanchoe plant. That's what gardeners call them here.

Jahblessme, thanks for your kind words. I'm a naturally curious person, I love learning for the joy of it and I like seeing kids do the same. Try and make time for these moments with your kid. It's a deliberate choice. One of my brothers always say "you need money to buy stuff, not to do things". In Nigeria, there are a lot of affordable safe things to do but people don't do it because they think that don't have time. For example, I've always picked seashells from childhood. I decided to do it with my baby and nephews and niece and we want to the (very dirty) beach in Lagos and got some, cleaned it and I gave them some to paint. We also played in the waves and I tried to teach a little about Tidal waves and how the moon affects the waves (They now say "the sun and the moon aren't friends so they don't hang out but the moon and the waves are friends so the waves come out stronger when the moon is out"). Little moments like that. Try and make time for those. Your toddler would love seashells and love playing cooking with flowers. I know because I did. And you need calming-down time.

cococandy:
I see what you mean.

That's true though. But My DH is the culprit in that one. He even bought some things I don't know what their functions are

All fathers do. I walk behind mine removing things from the cart. And he wants to buy everything pink, instead of unisex!

byvan03:
The hurt that comes with infidelity can't be wiped by a thousand cars, except where the man was never loved .

Well, let me speak some pidgin, "ashually, 3 brand new 2016 model card can wipe the tears away". a lot of women are married still because it is financially prudent and they need the support with the kids and "what will people say". If you ask them about hair husband's needs and his inner state of mind, they will look at you blankly. So yeah, an expensive gift works. When I was a child (like age 10!), my mum's friends always told me to make sure I got property in my name from my husband. No matter what.

cococandy:
lol. What made it weird?
They do have an entire section dedicated to carter's at babies R Us. (If that's the brand you swear by) Plus other good brands too. I love that I don't get distracted by other stuff when I'm there. I can never go to Macy's without buying something for myself even if I didn't plan to.

I've heard so much about this balogun market.

Babies R Us just encourages Consumer greed, when I went shopping, I nearly bought the whole store but one of my brothers went with me and he kept asking "do you need all this crap, did you not grow up normal without the fancy $150 diaper bag and $200 Graco Playard?" The issue with a store like that is that's it's so easy to over-buy. Even in Nigeria, when you go to Balogun, once you enter the children's section, they will sell you special baby plate set for N2500. Literally a plastic plate and 2 plastic spoons. And don't even get me started on the toys at Babies R Us: I fell like a maga and got a Sophie the Giraffe. It got lost at a wedding we attended at Radisson Blu $25 (N8,000) for a teething toy...

cococandy:
I'll Google and see if there's any restaurant supply stores around here.


the ones from Lagos, are they good quality too?
I could ask my mom for some when she's coming over.

I like Macy's because of their product standards. But I've never bought any baby stuff there before. Didn't even know they have a baby section.

babies 'r' us is usually the way to go when shopping for my baby. I've a baby registry there.

We got a ton of cute onesies from Macy's and they were good quality. I found a Carter's store and picked up plain white onesies from there. Babies R Us was weird for me. The headbands are decent.I want to Balogun market and chartered a lot and now I want more...

MetroTee

Red acalypha plant. Scientifically proven to help with most fungal infections. If you can buy it and plant outdoors in your house, it's a good plant to grow and use fresh. Or go to those gardeners at the side of the road as ask for cuttings. Carry a small bucket or bowl filled with water with you. As soon as you cut the plant, put it immediately in the bowl of water so it stays freah. Don't let them give you Green Acalypha, it's not as effective.

https://www.nairaland.com/2894705/hibiscus-flower-society-calling-all/5

cococandy:
Amen and amen. Same to you and yours.

I'll check it out. I have a Macy's account so I'm sure to get good stuff at great prices. Thank you

Macy's is great but don't waste money buying their headbands. Headbands can be pricey over there (i saw one on Etsy for $25 ) I bought some and my mum told me to wait till I get back to Lagos and she was right. 12 cute headbands for N1000 (less than $10). If you know anyone coming over, we can send you some.

cococandy:
i think I need to get me one of those. So many recipes that need that steamer and I just don't make them because I don't have it. Like those tummy steamed buns/

Go earthy! I felt like Rachel Roy or one of the cooks on BBC Food using mine. And they're relatively cheap (i got mine from a restaurant supply store in Cali last year). And for one strange reason I have no pots with dreamers in-built. Ewuro4, the only Nigerian food that is steamed is moin-moin.