₦airaland Forum

As one-time Nigerian military tyrant and later head of a fraud-riddled petroleum fund mismanagement ministry, Weeping General Buhari embezzled and stole huge fortunes in hard currency, meaning that he has had no need to engage in any meaningful business for the past 40 years, besides signing checks against the national wealth hidden in his personal accounts.

In recent years, Buhari has also received funds from international terror organizations who hope to forcibly install Buhari as a feudal RULER over Nigeria, who will make the nation's oil wealth accessible to those "investor" terrorist networks in return. Those donations from terror groups, added to personal loot spent by Buhari himself, are the twin sources of cash being deployed to finance the ongoing war waged by invading mercenary fundamentalist gangs, against the Nigerian federation.

iykpeterz:
Am currently 5.1ft and have a job proposal in the state...with mininum height of 5.5ft....within 3 months time....thats y i need it....which pharmacy could u recommend for me...to be atleast 5.5ft within 3months

No drug on earth exists that will make you suddenly grow taller over a short period of time, but something tells me this a joke thread anyway, so by all means try ALL drugs until you find one that either works, or kills you.

It is hardly surprising that Nigeria's foremost organizer of anti-government war, Weeping General Buhari, would seek out Nigeria's foremost money-laundering miracle pastor, in search of blessings Buhari hopes will ensure an election win by hook or by crook. At least when Buhari again loses this next election, he can still return to that miracle pastor when there is a need to "spirit" money away from Nigeria, with the power of the holy ghost and the holy jet.

The momentary pairing of these two prominently ugly figures on the Nigerian landscape - the terrorist gang leader seeking to "rule" Nigeria, and the highway-blocking miracle pastor who fleeces the poor, makes for an appropriate chapter in the dark theater of the absurd that plays out whenever election fever takes hold in Africa's largest nation.

As for Weeping General Buhari himself, never in the history of mankind has so much unfounded hope been placed on a losing horse, and never before has such an utter buffoon managed to present himself as a presidential candidate for more times and to NO avail, than is the case with this cow-herding gentleman, Buhari, who is evidently a hopeless glutton for pain and failure.

torhuke:
Happy birthday sor..

May you leave long to witness the 2nd coming of president Goodluck jonathan and the second for years of the transformation agenda.

I wish you the best of tears predicated on your imminent trouncing at the 2015 polls.

Once again, accept my felicitation

Amen. The tears will fall as usual, and court appeals will be lost, as usual, after which the cycle of life will resume as before, and as always.

PRISTINEMUSCLES:
I hope you know what you are about to get yourself into. If i may ask what do you need human growth hormone pills for?

Body-builders use them, and then they die young, very young.

It is about time that Nigeria's wild baboon, Weeping General Buhari, joins expired war-lord Charles Taylor behind bars in Holland.

Like Liberian genocide organizer Charles Taylor, Buhari is another mass murdering bastard who deserves to feel the full weight of criminal justice, which can ONLY be applied by a powerful international enforcer based OUTSIDE Nigeria, such as the International Criminal Court.

Let the trial commence as soon as the arrest and extradition of this felonious monkey, Buhari, has been accomplished, and then let Buhari go to weep FOREVER behind bars in jail where he belongs, and is long overdue.

sweetbb:
.Why is he a monster?

I love easy questions. Buhari is known for threatening "bloodshed" each time another election defeat looms in his immediate future, and after the last election he lost, numerous Nigerian Youth Corps election volunteers were killed on the direct orders of Weeping General Buhari, who made NO attempt to calm his rampaging lynch mobs, and get them to stop their frenzy of post-election killing.

So, for organizing mass murder, Buhari IS a monster. Thank you for seeking clarification on this point, and I hope this explanation suffices.

The liquidated 50 year-old fundamentalist cleric, who perpetrated that totally evil and depraved attack on civilians, had already racked up an impressive police record in his adopted homeland of Australia, for crimes ranging from petty larceny, to terrorist hate-mongering, and, most telling of all, SERIAL sex offences.

There exists a school of thought that suggests a direct causative linkage between the forcible segregation of genders in some overly moralistic societies and cultures, and the propensity for random predatory violence by testosterone-addled males who grew up in such repressive cultures, where simply having a premarital girlfriend was forbidden by the whim ugly old men with long beards. Perhaps this dead terrorist is a product of such cultures, and the destabilizing internal conflict they create in the human mind.

Wow, now there is a woman who truly believes in taking care of her figure. I got dizzy just checking out her toned abdomen, luscious pert hooters and firm silky thighs toned to the sublime perfection that makes one contemplate a tight, slippery squeeze. Lord have mercy !

The fact that she is a super-intelligent over-achiever, as well as dangerously sexy, is simply mind blowing.

obuksjr:
Marijuana in its raw form cannot be therapeutically fit for the indications ascribed to it above but the active ingredients,the cannabinoids when extracted can be useful in clinical practice.

Please no one should go on marijuana spree or indulgence in the pretence of curing one form of disease or the other because the euphoria you will get from it can never outweigh the major adverse effect....Psychosis.

Psychosis is only a risk to marijuana users who are genetically predisposed to mental instability, and, given that such individuals constitute a tiny minority out of any population, your dire warning is NOT applicable across the board, EVEN if millions of new users suddenly do embark on a weed smoking spree, in the mistaken belief that the drug will serve as a panacea cure for all ailments.

Your warning that marijuana is CERTAIN to cause psychosis is as truthful as a declaration that getting into a motorized vehicle is BOUND to result in death or injury from an accident, that swimming for exercise is BOUND to result in death by drowning, or that having an occasional glass of wine with dinner is CERTAIN to result in cirrhosis of the liver.

In other words your stern warning to weed smokers amounts to little more than fear-mongering.

Great stuff. More of this sort of information is needed to enlighten the world. Thanks for this post.

The German Shepherd war dogs, that went into battle with US infantry forces during the Vietnam and Gulf Wars, were credited with saving MANY soldier's lives by fore-warning foot patrols about hidden ambushes, by sniffing out man-killer traps set in the path of advancing troops, and on occasion, by engaging armed enemy combatants in desperate do-or-die hand-to-bite combat.

Like their human warrior counterparts, war dogs earn promotion to higher military rank in reward for bravery under fire, and, when those war dogs die in the theater of war, they are buried with FULL military honors, while the brave men, so many of whose very lives were saved by their four legged platoon mates, shed tears of mourning as fighting canines are committed to mother Earth.

When the good pastor flies to the sky to consult with Jesus, do you expect him to invite God's Son to join him for those important discussions in the economy class of a commercial passenger flight, or do you expect the pastor to provide a more, ahem, conducive and bespoke environment, for such heavenly discussions to be conducted ?

Suljosh:
And which hole did you come out from? Are in this country with us? I doubt if not shut it up.

Who no know go know.

Youngzedd:
Oil


Picture or forget it.

Maybe coconut oil, but NOT crude oil.

The "oil rich" town in northern Nigeria must have earned its name from the availability of groundnut oil in that area, since there is no record of any petroleum resources ever having been discovered throughout the entire north of the country.

Trut:
Hi NL,

I want to buy 4 giant cows for my kinsmen in this coming Christmas, how can I meet Buhari to buy the cows from him? If you have his contact, please let me know.

Thank you in advance
Trut.

To qualify for the privilege of buying one of Boko Haram leader Buhari's cows, you will be expected to prove yourself in the field of battle against Nigerian troops shaking the ground of the Sambisa Forest. It is only when you return from that war front with wounds to prove the fact, that you can then APPLY to buy a Boko Cow from their leader.

Finally, be advised that Boko Haram now uses suicide cows to attack innocents, so check your cow very well IF you are allowed to make this purchase.

Please contact Weeping General Buhari for any further details that you might require on this subject.

Hopefully this monster's family will be spared, when the opportunity to liquidate him forever arises and is exploited with extreme prejudice.

banki:
God WILL PUNISH you people

You must be God's supervisor, at least in your confused mind, to be SO certain that God will punish people that YOU feel ought to be punished.

Returning to reality, the punishment that is already LONG overdue is that which the International Criminal Court will ultimately mete out to your Weeping General Buhari, the Boko Haram terrorist gang leader and professional genocide instigator, for his DIRECT role in the killings of civilians after EACH AND EVERY election defeat suffered by that sick, blood-thirsty demon called Buhari.

Of course, the International Criminal Court may yet be preempted by a more DIRECT and EXPLOSIVE form of justice directed at Buhari your cult leader, as a more fitting reward for his career of "secret" massacre organizing.

Bayswater:
Bro, it is hard to delete such memories. It is only God that can comfort yourself and his parents. I just hope they are coping well.

What happened in 2011 should not be allowed to repeat itself, it's better they cancel the forthcoming election.

There is no need to cancel the election brother, because there is NO chance in hell that terror gang leader Weeping General Buhari will win anything besides a train ticket back to his desert village, with his mangy tail between his legs, after yet another spectacular electoral defeat.

Terror gang leader, Weeping General Buhari, MUST be brought to book to face criminal trial at the International Criminal Court in Holland, where warlord Charles Taylor is languishing for life, since there is NO statute of limitations applicable to cases of capital murder, or incitement to murder, a crime which Buhari is guilty of committing MANY times over in 2011, and even before that time frame.

For all the good it will do him, Buhari can use his terrorist donation money to print his name large on balloons, toilet paper, dustbins and condoms, but all that wasted money will not avert the usual election DEFEAT that awaits the Boko Geezer Buhari, when the votes are finally counted in 2015.

Billyonaire:
If anyone knocks on my gate to opens his mouth to sell Buhari, I will drag him into the compound, lock the gates, and release the dogs at him. The dogs are best teachers for Boko Haram crusaders.

But if they go to Paradise after being savaged by dogs, will their eligibility for the promised 72 virgins not be adversely affected as a result ?

drss:
Just yesterday a CNN Analyst Christian Purefoy was insulted black and blue by Nairaland APC e Warriors because of his honest opinion about the acceptability of Buhari's candidature as APC's flag bearer. To them anyone that speaks against Buhari is a paid agent of Goodluck Jonathan. However, facts emerging from the just concluded APC Presidential primaries suggest that the CNN analyst was right after all. It was discovered that out of a total of 7250 accredited delegates to the primaries, 1,206 of them choose to stay away. Their actions could be interpreted as a clear case of rejection of Buhari's candidature.
On the other hand, a person like Buhari, whom the APC consider as the best Presidential material was expected to clear as much as 70% of the votes to boost his acceptability as the best candidate APC got to offer, but instead he cleared just 57.2% of the total votes cast. This is a clear message that all is not well within the APC.
If Buhari could struggle to get 57.2% to emerge as APC presidential flag bearer, then he has a very slim chance of winning the Presidential elections come 2015.
The analyst was right.

Weeping General Buhari's true value lies in the comedic relief he brings to every election conducted in Nigeria over the past decade. Everyone informed about the existence and diabolical character of terror gang leader Buhari will no doubt be aware that he is a masochist and career election loser who actually enjoys being defeated at national polls, so as to have a ready excuse to weep again in public like a malnourished infant housed in a refugee camp, therefore it stands to reason that Buhari is as essential a freak side-show to any Nigerian election as are dry banana leaves substituting for toilet paper in a public latrine.

Yazmin:
Go to the google play store and download to install the d*ck enlargement app.
If you are still unable to act, then you may suggest a panel beater to reshape and re size your wife's V to accommodate your midget m*nhood.....
Peace!!!!

This is a good idea, provided that the OP will have no objection to his wife bearing the child of the panel beater, and considering that offspring as his own.

IBROHIM:
may God punish you and ur progeny if you lie about anything in this post of urs! Amen 1000x!

I always thank individuals who re-post my submissions in this forum, because their quotations of my words draw the attention of more readers who might have otherwise overlooked my posts. Have a nice day sir, if you are in fact capable of spotting the difference between a a nice day and a bad one, and, may I take this opportunity to offer condolences on your state of mind.