₦airaland Forum

Let him find out for himself.
As time goes by they will go to the doc,carry out a fertility test and he shall find out the truth.How he reacts and what he does thereafter is not anybody's biz.
Never come between 2 married people unless the matter at hand is a grave one.

^^
is it ballgum!

If both of you were committed to this relationship this would not have happened.
It seems like he wasn't too sure about it the reason he didn't want to talk about the future.That wasn't good on his part cz he needed to at least given you some sense of assurance and security.With that in mind you would not have entertained this other dude.
I hate gaps in a relationship because its risky investing all your emotions on somebody and its not being reciprocated.Its a waste of time and tht's why its good to define it after a month of knowing each other.
Now take a step at a time.If he gets wind of it,clearly tell him your reasons for having done so and don't lie. This relationship may not even last so go slow.
But if he starts talking marriage please find a way of disclosing before somebody else spoils for you.At least if he ends up marrying you,he will be doing it fully aware of what transpired while he was in service.some people have a forgiving heart.
You don't want him thinking that you betrayed him after saying 'i do' cz he may find that hard to deal with.
Start your marriage on a clean page not with hidden skeletons.
ope all wl be well

This post smells of lust,deception and desperation.
Lust>>>You knew she was wayward but you went ahead and dated her
Deception>>>She got pregnant and aborted. Did you even confirm it was your baby she was carrying?
Desperation>> She has to get married at all costs including aborting baby you are not even sure was yours.
Her family has been made aware of the impending marriage !

You were led by lust.But listen a broken relationship is better than a pathetic marriage.
Enough sins have been committed so please don't add to your sorrows.
Call off that relationship and use one of those lines like ' you deserve a better person'.
Avoid carrying all the guilt cz shes also played a big part in 'trapping' you.
And as somebody said 'break it off in open space and leave town for a month to help her heal and overcome'

This is what happens when people fail to define their relationship right from the word go!
I am sure you entered into the 2 relationships cz u felt insecure holding on to a relationship that had no eyes or ears. You guys were to shallow then.

But op are you telling me that you slept with 2 dudes while the guy you considered 'friend' went for service? Wish you were just friends with them but going all the way with 2 dudes within such a short period speaks a lot.
See results.A guilty conscience. You need lots of wisdom here cz spilling the beans has consequences and so does silence.

You two are not even married so just be friends and see how things go cz theres cancer in it already.
Who knows what escapades he may have engaged in as well while he was away.
Do not hold on to the relationship cz hes good to you But;

Ask yourself whether he truly deserves being with a person like you.

[/quote]

5stardude:
OP bro ain't you suppose to be taking money from customers in your dad's church at this time?

your nasty.
[quote author=sexsinners link=topic=746348.msg9025543#msg9025543 date=1314521364]you treat someone elses family member like trash, guess what your family member will get it 10 times worse.

Read your bible well sinners.We dont leave under the law anymore where it was stone for stone and sword for sword.
Now stop all these holy water crap! its just water anything else is witchcraft. Instead of preaching Jesus you are talking about water.
Get this fact right.One time people wanted to stone some adulterous woman.Am sure you know the story. This is not a 'very unique case or the worst that can happen to any individual.
An adult is not 'forced to Be Intimate' That's called 'violation'.Now if it wasnt violation it was mutual,she gave in out of pressure otherwise she had options.
If it wasnt for the infection,she wouldn't have showed up in your dad's church for prayers! See how sin exposes us? She would still be doing it with the dude as we speak.
But now she sick and needs forgiveness.She should be happy she's alive.
That's why am telling you to forget your curses cz they are hitting the wall.
The gal is forgiven and am sure God's word for her is 'go and sin no more.
The dude is plotting his next move.What are you gonna do? There are worse people in the world you know.eg murderes,phaedophiles, etc.They will meet God stop carrying their headaches because you are not the 'saviour of mankind. It is finished!

[quote author=aloy-emeka link=topic=745623.msg9017725#msg9017725 date=1314409470]You love her and she loves you but she demands that for[b] your relationship to work,[/b] there will be no kissing/s3x/ hugging, etc for at least 5 years unless both of you get married before then. She doesn't have any problem spending your cash at will tho. Will you agree to such relationship where absolute celibacy rules?[/quote]There's no proof that failure to engage in all that will make the relationship work.It may even lead some to do it with other people. On the other hand I like it when sex come to seal everything that you know about each other.last, no matter how long/short it takes.

But why spend so much cash on somebody when she/he is not your wife?
Evrything you do before you say I do is a risk.With such a long relationship be careful with your spending! cz anything could happen so only risk what you would not feel bitter about incase the relationship fails.

sinners what exactly is troubling? I want to convince myself that you are a clown but you seem real!

sexsinners:
Today, i had witness the saddest thing ever, during my fathers church counselling there was one young lady who came into confess her unnatural sins.My father who is a pastor was advincing her, the thing is she was forced to Be Intimate with her boyfriend and now she is cursed with STD.Surprisingly, the boy she mentioned i happen to know him,and guess what he has a young sister  that he supposedly cares about, and he talks about how much he loves his mom.Yet he goes and does this devilish act to a poor Innocent young lady and ruin her life forever.

Does this boy know that worse will happen to his sister ,because of the foolish act he did. i myself the holy man will shower a girl with everything i had and give her all my love, because i would want a guy to do that to my sister.

so i will like to ask all the sinners who are cheaters, abusers,harassers,despoiler,control freaks, devilish players , everything of the devils work

do you have a sister?

1. I am sure people confide secretly with their pastors and you need to be careful as a 'pastor's son not go out gossiping about people's personal issues. It's like a doctor exposing his patient's files.

2. Theres a difference between curse and disease!.She has a disease! she not cursed!

3.I just cant seem to to relate the two.The boy having a sister and him infecting the gal with std! Are you implying that it would have been much better if he didnt have a sister or loved his mother?

4 Okay so what do u mean by 'something happening to his sister?' Are you planning to infect her as revenge or worse still kill her? What's your prediction? Guess what! Nothing will happen to his sister.
You know why? That is what human's wish for but God doesn't do stuff like that.He not crazy you know.

5.She wasnt violated!She gave in finally.That;s not like violation. So do not start cursing the silly guy.

6.'so i will like to ask all the sinners whocheaters, abusers,harassers,despoiler,control freaks, devilish players , everything of the devils work'

>>>>>Now Its words like those above that make me think you belong to some crazy cult.
Please dont take over your fathers church! If you are the representative,I hate to imagine how the other members are like!

7.Yes we have sisters/brothers .So how does having one relate to this 'story' of yours?

8. You are not a holy man 'ONLY GOD IS HOLY.


She has confessed her sins and God has forgiven her.She now needs to go see a 'human doctor' for treatment and move on with life.

You on the other hand forget about the matter. Your biz ends in the church after the counselling.

2buff:
That being said, the word hard to get has 2 meanings. There's Hard to get to know, and hard to get in bed. I'm speaking of the first one. I wouldn't even bring up the 2nd with her as no be my wife. Doing dumb poo like cancelling plans last minute, letting the guy's message sit too long in voicemail before answering, and general dissing of the guy's time  etc all just because she wants to act busy

Now that makes good sense. I think most people here have the second meaning in mind while replying to this topic.

2buff:
As an adult, who considers herself an adult, you should know what you want from someone without wasting their time when they ask you simple questions.
Now she should have the benefit of some time to think through it, but an answer to this kind of question should not take more than a week to answer if she is an acute-minded individual (and here comes the key) who respects the value of this unrenewable resource called TIME.

That again makes sense.There's no point pursuing somebody that you don't fancy at all.
A guy should be able to sense this and leave the gal alone not waste time like a hunter frantically chasing an antelope.
What I know is that a lady will give you her time and attention if she has a thing for you.
It takes less than 5 min for her to decide if you are worth her time and attention.
If she treats you like plague just go cz her mind has already said no.
Now If shes putting up 'a play hard to get' act  she will regret and come back running.Unfortunately the dude will have moved on.
Its therefore good to know what you want and save each other's time.

[quote author=Mrs.Chima link=topic=745550.msg9022611#msg9022611 date=1314472751]You guys didn't wasted no time. Now I see why he doesn't want you adding his relatives on your facebook page.[/quote]was wondering about the same. Don't know why hes overprotective all of a sudden.

Russialane:
@pendo89 that prenup way you wan draft nothing for you inside hope you are aware

Russialane:
i might even leave my properties for my mistresses will you sign?

Lets be clear here and this is just an example.
I dont meet a dude next thing is sign a pre and start living.Damn! I can only be a wife or single not mistress.
Prenups are mostly done by people that have wealth and want to safeguard it.
See,people come together with clear intentions but stuff happens and they go separate ways.
Then the battle for property begins.Now this is the kind of headache nobody wants to deal with.

For me to sign any prenup there must be something called marriage in the horizon. Not mistress.
That is too shallow.

Russialane:
My point exactly. . Why the heck do I got to lie of being faithful till death with one woman for the rest of my life when I knw I can't keep that promise plus other craps that comes from marriage? Nah.         QUESTION

Then you have 3 options.

Do not marry
Sign prenup and be safe
keep on cohabiting.

While you are at the 3rd option,rem that age is catching up with you and sooner or later you may not be 'all that'
Its also expensive in the long run.Dont you think so?

Russialane:
@pendo89 if i were to marry you and i give you a prenup to sign would you sign it.

And why not? I would infact draft it! I have no issues with prenups.People are just too greedy nowadays

Russialane:
My point exactly. . Why the heck do I got to lie of being faithful till death with one woman for the rest of my life when I knw I can't keep that promise plus other craps that comes from marriage? Nah. QUESTION

Am as real as one can get.
I once opened a thread asking if the marriage vows 'for better or for worse are a fallacy'
If you ask me I would say yes.
Things have changed soo much and sometimes things hit rock bottom so are u gonna wake up singing for better or worse till death even when its staring at you in the face?
Trust me yeah the death will surely happen like in that story I read here on nl about some lady banker plus a similar one involving a journalist.
But since people put money first nowdays then to be on the safe side.Sign the prenup!
Infact that will cause somebody to behave a bit and its a good way of testing somebody's real love if either party is loaded!

All that matters nowadays is peace of mind not status.

But that jumping in and out has its own faults as well.

Whatever the case.have peace.

5stardude:
Ma'am adoption is not on the list. . I expected you to suggest "contract marriage" make babies and bounce

I got a better suggestion for you.Get her to sign the Prenup. I see nothing wrong with that.
I guees its one and the same thing ,isnt it?

Nway stick to the thread.This we can discuss in the religious section but just know your assumptions are wrong.

back to thread pliz

I thought it was possible to have kids whether you married or not.You can even adopt if you need to.
Must you marry? Of course Not.
Why marry then ? That's your biz.Everybody's got their own reasons for doing so.

Children,Love, Faith/religious reasons,society pressure,money,status,old age,traditions/arranged and etc.
Pick your choice.

Good news is.Its a matter of choice!

Toba pliz. Not everything that Jesus did is recorded and you know that very well.
He was God in human body meaning he showered,went to the bathroom,etc.
But where do you come across JC going to take a shower or toilet?
Everywhere you read about somebody getting healed, something spiritual must have happened.
His healing power or virtue had to be transferred to the sick person for them to get well.
Just because its mentioned in that particular case and nowhere else does not mean that the same thing never happened.
Besides so what if it happened or not.The most important thing was the healing not the process.Thts God's biz.

toba:
in addition to your post, when the woman with the issue of blood touched Jesus, Jesus felt that something came out of him. Thats to tell u that the thing u people regard as just ordinary monthly discharge is something in spiritual ground.

Note:That something was His Healing virtue or power.
There's nothing spiritual about periods! neither is there anything spiritual with eating food or showering.

ok.cheers b4 it goes religious

lefulefu you are soo disgusting.
I now ensure that am not eating when about to read your posts.
why do you even bother about what they do when you already have a great ukranian gf that spoonfeeds you in bed?
your mind really needs a makeover.

toba:
Word
those things are heartless and wicked. Thats why im considering being a celibacy

You keep calling women 'things'
You cannot stand a woman that menstruates
Now tell me,what exactly are you looking for? Why not save yourself headache and become a Father.
Its the best way to avoid meeting and seeing 'menstruating things'

Russialane:
@pendo89 you are a woman you should know better losing ones job is ONE out of a thousand reasons for divorce

Its never the reason!! People love blaming the wrong things.Its how you behave after losing it.
Ok lemmie put it this way.If money is what seals your marriage then yeah it is correct to say IT IS the reason.
But if its real love,then its just a contributing factor cz how you behave after losing it will determine if the marriage will last or not.

You are too shallow minded. How many cases of divorce have hpnd as a result of one spouse losing a job?
You make divorce sound like a small game of cards.
Losing a job is one factor which may lead to manifestation of intolerable behaviour eventually resulting in divorce.
It's therefore not the 'reason' cz one may lose a job,remain and act sober and still have a loving/understanding and supporting spouse.
But some mad people create hell when they lose it.

I believe dreams come as a result of the day's activities or biz.
If I spend the day lusting and watching indecency then what d u expect my dreams to comprise off? definately not cooking food.
Do not therefore blame any spirit but your eyes and mind.

If you are into those crazy demonic and weird stuff then you are bound to encounter such things.
I avoid pple who like talking about witchcraft stuff cz they have away of rubbing onto you.

Love >>>  Death
Act >>> you die to self.

Ok this is what op. Call it what you want to.We do all sorts of crazy things and call it love.
The suicide bomber will call his actions love. So its vain trying to shove down everybody's throat the true meaning of that word
For me, love is lust,sacrifice and dying to self. Those lovelydovey feelings are characteristics of romantic love,but they don't define love. They qualify to be called lust.
Now the moment you understand somebody better and embrace them with all their weakneses and shortcomings and these defects fail to dilute those lovelydovey feelings(lust)you have then I call that love.
Its goes deeper than lust.
In other words love is a composition of both lust and sacrifice.When put in a kiln,the lusty feelings may disappear but the sacrifice remains.That is love.